₦airaland Forum

I want to quit the relationship, but some friends told me to forgive her. So, I need all your sincere & mature advice on this. What should I do?

If Nairaland didnt exist what would you have done?What if you didn't have friends? Listen and obey your conscience.Advice comes in all forms but ONLY YOU knows what is best and good for your life.

A relationship without trust is no relationship.

DONDAV! Thread is about a beautiful girl! Your pics are scattered on all NL threads.
Put in on ur profile.

aha acid it's well. Hope she comments.

And what are you waiting for?
Give her the honour of opening a thread and start the intros before another grabs the chance.You never know.
Send her a PM.Do not be shy.
and true she's pretty.

poster don't be ignorant.
Facts.

S.Sudan must be the most expensive place in Africa to live in right now.Used to be Angola. You can't afford S.Sudan.
S.Sudanese are very rich.Go there and see how big they live.If you expect to see them show off you are dreaming.
The S.Sudanese can be very hostile to foreigners. DO NOT risk going there to do biz on your own except you have connections with an NGO who can gurantee ur security.
They know many foreigners are flocking there for new biz opportunities and they are'nt taking that with eyes closed.
Almost every S.Sudanese male you see on the streets is an officer.Chances of you getting killed easy are high.
If you think they are starving and suffering you are soo misguided! The place is fertile.
I see nothing wrong in being black.Are you not a black man? They are dark and very tall.
DO NOT TRY to mess up or con one cz ul be dead in min.
Above all,keep up with latest news! Infrastructure is coming up and at this rate it may overtake some of these African countries who feel soo ahead~
Oil they have in abundance.They are co=perating with neighbouring countries 4 development and everything is happening.
From Banks,Hospitals,Schools etc.
Give it few years and see.

I stumbled upon a good evidence that one of her ex lovers is a reverend father. She is vey close to this priest who constantly bombard her with phone calls even at odd hours in the night.

When did you say you tied the knot again? This year??
Seems you got ur mind made up and you are both seeking for ways out of this union.
It's not even out of the weaning period and major issues are crippling it.Evaluate this before you bring kids into this union, cz I got a feeling this was a pressure marriage.Either society or age.

Why do people marry hoping that they will change their partner's beliefs? These are things to iron out before you say I do.
It's really sad to note how religious affiliations can cause a marriage to break.Seems like you have your mind made up.
That your wife is a tough woman.She is not converting to salvage this marriage, but again at 36, just married and with no kids she's at a cross road.
It's up to you.If you make religion a big issue here, then that's your problem since you have described her earlier as a great and lovely lady.
What if you dump her for an anglican one,then she ends up giving you hell in marriage.What grounds will you use to dump her? Cruelty? You could turn into a serial divorcee.
Weigh both options and pick the one with less disastrous consequences.I see no big deal in 'religion', otherwise tell me which religion Jesus followed.

I hear wedding bells ringing for slimyem.
Nway I am married because I found me a prince.
Why I wasn't married then was cz I was meeting frogs instead of men.

I enjoy Rokiatu's threads. They contain substance and are funny.
mmh song? lemmie think of a good one.

why i shouldn't contact an ex? well because he's axed.
honestly,when you have a cool,loving,caring guy by your side,a guy that fills your world and satisfies you well,why would you want to contact your ex? just why?
exes have a way of vanishing out of your mind very fast when you are showered with love.
now that i really love.

deleted rpt.

slimyem: pendo,i get all of that...
I've actually never seen a God-fearing man in every sense of the word...or maybe our definitions of the word 'God-fearing' just vary according to our beliefs and exposure...
..i don't get the part of the attributes being cultivated over time though...
If he doesn't have those qualities,then he doesn't have them!
I have always believed one can't change a grown man and i still do!
I wouldn't even enter into a relationship with the hopes/plans of changing a man into what i want...
Above all...you have spoken well..
Thanks!!

you sure have a point.
Say u meet a guy today and he's fine in all aspects but tolerance. Reason? circumstances may have nurtured this in him.
The mentioned imo are attributes that can be worked upon to 'reduce' their levels, because we are not born with humility,patience kindness or God fearing.
They are only refined by life's situations, so if one is dating and choose to face stuff together,the rugged edges on them are made straight.
They become better people.The people we desire to have as mates.
There are exceptions I must add which one must never embrace.

slimyem: Some say i am choosy.
Choosy?
Oh yes,i am choosy...
I want to marry a man that has been raised almost like me or preferably better than me-with the same kind of values...
Does he exist??
That honest,kind-hearted,loving,hard-working,respectful,responsible,dilligent,God-fearing man.
Are there any of them left or am i just deluded?

Had to read through again.
It's fine to know and go for what you want, but I just never get the God fearing.The kindest of men I have come across are almost non religious.
Girls scream God fearing, making it very easy for evil guys to act as one for a while.
A balanced guy is okay but most of these attributes you desire are cultivated over time.Give time and chance is all i can say.If he doesn't change for the better then you are free.
Lastly look at urself as a tool to help sharpen and bring out these attributes in a man.Some of us ladies have the ability to create a monster out of a man.
Iron sharpens iron

yes they do.even on this very forum they do.

firs pic- girlish
second pic- cool and manly
third pic-emaciated.

Gosh!
Does it take all that text to know how?
I don't think I should struggle to know at all.Let nature takes it course.Don't push,force,sweat etc.
If it's real love,the person draws near without much struggle.Must be the emotional connection.
If that doesn't happen he /she wasn't meant for you.

I analyse a lot.I ask a lot of questions.I am extremely extremely wary and switch off very fast.

[quote author=Okija_juju]firewood.[/quote] people can be soo funny.

Knife,scissor,blender,fork,anything with sharp edge,shredder,dustbin ok may I go outside the kitchen??

heheh Nl is very funny.
The more people criticise a thread the longer it becomes. 6 pages now.

aaw. sweet encounter

.

methodman: Though u abandoned me and my elder sister even b4 i clocked 1year....i used to curse u but i have decided to forgive u. Dont know what u look like...Dont know if u are still alive.... But pls dont ever turn up on my wedding day cuz i really dont wanna see u. I grew up in Pains...But against all odds, i have learned to live in harmony with a kindly friend or foe.

omg.This drove me to tears. Be grateful to God for this far. Find a place in ur heart to forgive her so that u can be blessed.
But hey,you are here and alive.Some were never given a chance to see daylight by their mothers so count yourself blessed. That is what matters.

discipline
so much respect for God.
no condition is permanent.
there is reward in persevearance and humility
patience.
to stay focused.never move with the crowd.

open thread ' xyz will u marry me'
login in while together make sure u got ur profile pic up.
Ensure the thread is in very large fonts and ask killz to push it to front page.
have ring ready. if she rejects we shall offer solace.
if she accepts we rejoice together.

the nl proposal

This story is just complex. am eager to know what exactly happened.
flying over mt.kenya requires skills cz the weather is crazy up there and requires exp.
kenya military fly above there with ease and so do private individuals.

3/4 of men replying ask their girlfriends to send them unclad pics.

I used to receive such yet am female.
Its just a scam imo.

[quote author=tpia!]i think about 90% of the posters on nl are weed smokers.

the figure is probably higher- that's a conservative estimate.

i'd say about 97% for the men, and possibly 75% for the women.[/quote]

if only i could understand what you are saying. but i will just repeat wht killz said.
don't force things esp love.allow it to come and flow naturally.you will be at peace.