₦airaland Forum

Who initiated this yeye stupid topic anyway?

Hotstepper,
abeg who's this lucky guy?
Isn't it funny that while you may be dying to say it, this guy may be running mental for you too?
That's life oo. So, let the cat outta the bag.

Increase your daily water intake.
Brush your teeth and tongue first thing in the morning and before you go to bed at night
Minty chewing gum helps too

Like some have rightly pointed out, marriage insitutionalises a partnership between a man and a woman (man & man or woman and woman as has become the case recently )

It accords legality to such a partnership so that either partner can seek redress should anything go wrong.
Children from illegal marriages are termed bastards. Not a nice title to bear

I know of such a partnership. The man is extremely rich and educated. He is also a playa playa. He never got married to the partner. She just moved in and they started proliferating kids. They literally banged their way into the partnership.

She can only sit back and look. There's no divorce nor settlement in this case. She can only (should she choose to) walk out from his house like any other friday-night-one-night-stander. Only this time, we are talking of more than 15 years.

So marriage is essential. It is sacred and should be regarded as such.

They are also considerate and receptive

Typical Nigerian behaviours

Throwing out stuffs from moving cars
Jumping queues especially at the airport
Disobeying traffic lights
Spraying money at social gatherings
Fashion parade in church
Borrowing without ever paying back (bad debt)
Turning up late for every event (African time)
Fixing appointments that can never be met (popular with arisans-tailors, mechanics etc)

jafar:
What Happens To Women's Figure 8 When They Get Married?

Why would a woman get married as a slim, beautiful figured lady and all of a sudden get married and blow up looking so fat? Yet when the husbands go looking for figure 8 ladies, the fat wife begins to get upset.

So what is wrong with women that they watch this happen to them?

Reason is simple. They are feeding more than they did as single, probably because they can twice afford to do so.

On a more serious note (considering my previous posts)

No one really cares what colour your wedding gown is, so long as it's a wedding gown. Priest these days are more concerned at the fitting/style of gown than the colour. Some churches are rather strict as regards what should be displayed/miraged through a wedding gown.

We are living in a world where a lot of things have changed.

In a world where "can I have a fork please" now raises an eyebrow;
a world where cats are no longer called pussy or puuussssss
a world where John means more than the apostle

I guess a white wedding gown could as well denote an x-rated virgin (six blow jobs and two heads)

sage:
I have a friend who has given 6 different guys head and has recieved head from two of them
( but her hymen is still there because one of the guys tried to penetrate her suddenly and could not). I want to know if she deserves a white weeding too ( because she is still a 'virgin')

Yeye posts

It's very easy to decipher from the tone with ehich your posts are composed that some people are:

proud to be ;
non-chalant about not being ;
wishing they could still be ;

Get the picutre?

shawna:
i think it doesnt matter these days women wear watever color regardless of whether they are virgins or not but one thing i do know is that am definitely wearing a white wedding dress

Hovering on the fence

kellorah:
lol

Bisanke:
lol SAY WHATTTTTT hahahaha lol *screaming*

Bisanke & Kellorah,

Congrats!
You just passed the test
Well done!

I bet my b***s someone's gonna fall for it (and head first too)

By their fruits posts, you shall know them (virgins and non virgins)

Most of the comments made here in support of Orji Kalu's bid for president have been made by people who may never have set foot on Abia state since the beginning of this century.

Before we start clamouring and supporting and campaigning for him, let's take a trip to Aba and see the wonder that his administration has created there. I can outline the following as some of his administration's achievements:

1. Converting Aba to the "refuse dump of the nation".
2. There is hardly any motorable road in Aba as of today.
3. Almost every bank in Aba was robbed last month (June).

Yes, he started off well by building roads. These roads don't exist anymore.

Whoever is clamouring for his candidature should kindly take a trip to Aba. While Aba is not the only city in Abia, it can generate enoguh revenue to cater for its needs if properly managed.

Forget what the websites say. Come to Aba and see for yourself. Personally I will not vote for him. He is a complete disgrace as a governor. Abia State is an oil-producing state. Yet states like Enugu and Ebonyi with no such luxury have fared better.

No need to ask for the gifts.

Even if she returns 70% of them (which won't happen)

What about the time you spent together?
Can you get that back too?

Isn't that worth more than all the gifts in the world,

two-folds??

Are there still nice guys out there?

Yes there are.

But sometimes they sound boring, antiquated, outdated and old-fashioned.
They aren't always denzel washington, taye diggs or morris chestnut.
You will have to read between the lines to fish them out.

But they are very much around the corner.

Closer than you may ever imagine.

Going back to reality

Every playa has one special person who has his heart.

So, a man can love a woman and still cheat on her.
And what does this say?

It implies that sex is an over-emphasised and misconstrued way of expressing love.

However, a man can still love his wife and remain faithful to her. Not every man cheats on his wife/girlfriend. The percentage may be so small, but they are still out there.

Rottweiler:
Some banks pay higher than some oil companies when the comparison is on the basis of monthly take home. But in between, there are several huge lumpsum payments that are made like: Rent, Security, Vehicle grant, Vehicle maintenance, generator maintenance, Fuel subsidy, market performance, Clothing, Education assistance, etc.

Another point to note is that the banking industry does not operate a pension scheme. Once a banker retires, at whatever age, he's paid off once and for all.

There is an annual union/management negotiation in the oil industry and the benchmark is always the highest paying company. This means that SHELL can lead this year but another company will take over the following depending on the outcome of its negotiations. The present order is: SHELL, ELF, MOBIL, CHEVRON, AGIP,

NNPC, NAPIMS, DPR, PETROCHEMICAL are more or less in the civil service category.

spoken like an insider

Rhodalyn:
Sumtymes U guys tend to act too Clingy, girls hate that!!! it gets annoying

Myspecs
You have a tender heart.
Time will harden it.
Rhodalyn just said it all
It's about time you became a playa playa

Eustace:
I WILL LEAVE TO CANADA NEXT MONTH.

Why not launch your search in canada or wait till you return.
Abi you wan marry by proxy?

Anyway, best of luck

0911 numbers are international numbers. Nothing to be scared of. It comes with the shanty connections we get in Naija.

What if they are 419 people??

Can they swindle you straight from your mobile?
Unless you're one greedy person.

Could it be a call from a witch/wizard etc etc
C'mon guys!

Infatuation:
A foolish, unreasoning, or extravagant passion or attraction.

Is every first love foolish, unreasoning or extravagant? I would say no.

Your first love may appear foolish 10 years later because you've grown more mature, and your way of reasoning has changed. However, you could have fallen in love for a good motive.

Part of what I did for my first love was to write love letters and spray some perfume on the paper.
I would also mark a section of the letter and ask my hearthrob to kiss kiss kiss . Those were the days. And they were well-intended.

Is that foolish?

Nope. Funny, maybe; but not foolish. Today i would pass for romantic.

seguncool:
Hi everybody
i want us to creat a forum for flashers and people that loves
sending text messages,
so, submit your phone number,
my phone number is 08066632958

See levels,
Bros wan obtain phone number from babes
U too mush ooo!

25 pounds just packed neatly behind is not bad at all. That should surely send your angel back to heaven every time he comes around.

luciano80:
I Want Real Testimonies: Not Hear-says

I have being to Warri and Port-harcourt and schooled in Uniben. I've never heard about Shell employing fresh graduates. They might hold all kinds of tests, but never hire. Abi I dey lie ma people?

Luciano for life.

Luciano,
You lie small.

Shell in Nigeria recruits fresh graduates through three different processes.

1. SITP 1 & 2: The advert is placed in the dailies every year and is open to technical graduates from any Nigerian university with at least a second class-lower.

2. Overseas Graduate: If you have an MSc in an petroleum related discipline from a recognised university in Europe/USA, then you are eligible for recruitment under this scheme. If you fall under this category, then contact Shell directly.

The text below was culled from the internet. It makes quite an interesting read and could serve as a guide for those about to settle down.

A relationships coach lays out his 5 golden rules for evaluating the
prospects of long-term marital success.  When it comes to making the decision
about choosing a life partner, no one wants to make a mistake.
Yet, with a divorce rate of close to 50percent, it appears that many
are making serious mistakes in their approach to finding Mr, /Ms.Right!

If you ask most couples who are engaged why they're getting
married,they'll say:
"We're in love."

I believe this is the #1 mistake people make when they date. Choosing a
life partner should never be based on love. Though this may sound not
politically correct, there's a profound truth here.

Love is not the basis for getting married. Rather, love is the result
of a good marriage. When the other ingredients are right, then the love will
come.

Let me say it again: You can't build a lifetime relationship on love
alone. You need a lot more.

Here are five questions you must ask yourself if you're serious about
finding and keeping a life partner.

QUESTION #1:

Do we share a common life purpose?

Why is this so important? Let me put it this way: If you're married for
20 or 30 years, that's a long time to live with someone. What do you plan to do
with each
other all that time? Travel, eat and jog together? You need to share
something deeper and more meaningful.

You need a common life purpose. Two things can happen in a marriage.
You can grow together, or you can grow apart. 50 percent of the people out
there are growing apart. To make a marriage work, you need to know what you want
out of life bottom line-and marry someone who wants the same thing.

QUESTION #2:

Do I feel safe expressing my feelings and thoughts with this person?
This question goes to the core of the quality of your relationship.

Feeling safe means you can communicate openly with this person. The
basis of having good communication is trust - i.e. trust that I won't get
"punished" or hurt for expressing my honest thoughts and feelings.

A colleague of mine defines an abusive person as someone with whom you
feel afraid to express your thoughts and feelings. Be honest with yourself
on this one. Make sure you feel emotionally safe with the person you plan to
marry.

QUESTION #3:

Is he/she a mensch?

A mensch is someone who is a refined and sensitive person. How can you
test?

Here are some suggestions. Do they work on personal growth on a regular
basis? Are they serious about improving themselves?

A teacher of mine defines a good person as "someone who is always
striving to be good and do the right thing." So ask about your significant other: What
do they do with their time? Is this person materialistic? Usually a
materialistic person is not someone whose top priority is character refinement.

There are essentially two types of people in the world:

People who are dedicated to personal growth and people who are
dedicated to seeking comfort. Someone whose goal in life is to be comfortable will
put personal comfort ahead of doing the right thing. You need to know that
before walking down the aisle.

QUESTION #4:

How does he/she treat other people?

The one most important thing that makes any relationship work is the
ability to give. By giving, we mean the ability to give another person pleasure.

Ask: Is this someone who enjoys giving pleasure to others or are they
wrapped up in themselves and self- absorbed?

To measure this, think about the following:

How do they treat people whom they do not have to be nice to, such as a
waiters, bus boy, taxi driver, etc?

How do they treat parents and siblings? Do they have gratitude and
appreciation? If they don't have gratitude for the people who have given them
everything, you cannot you --who can't do nearly as much for them!

Do they gossip and speak badly about others? Someone who gossips cannot
be someone who loves others.

You can be sure that someone who treats others poorly
will eventually treat you poorly as well.

QUESTION #5:

Is there anything I'm hoping to change about this person after we're
married?

Too many people make the mistake of marrying someone with the intention
of trying to "improve" them after they're married.

As a colleague of mine puts it, "You can probably expect someone to
change after marriage , for the worse!" If you cannot fully accept this person the
way they are now, then you are not ready to marry them.

In conclusion, dating doesn't have to be difficult and treacherous. The
key is to try leading a little more with your head and less with your heart.

It pays to be as objective as possible when you are dating, to be sure
to ask questions that will help you get to the key issues.

Falling in love is a great feeling, but when you wake up with a ring on
your finger, you don't want to find yourself in trouble because you didn't
do your homework.

Another perspective,

There are some people in your life that need to be loved from a
distance. It's amazing what you can accomplish when you let go of or at least minimize
your time with draining, negative, incompatible, not-going anywhere
relationships.
Observe the relationships around you.

Pay attention.

Which ones lift and which ones lean?

Which ones encourage and which ones discourage?

Which ones are on a path of growth uphill and which ones are going
downhill?

When you leave certain people do you feel better or feel worse?

Which ones always have drama or don't really understand, know, or
appreciate you?

The more you seek quality, respect, growth, peace of mind, love and
truth around you, the easier it will become for you to decide who gets to sit in
the front row and who should be moved to the balcony of your life.

An African proverb states, "Before you get married, keep both eyes
open, and after you marry, close one eye."

Before you get involved and make a commitment to someone, don't let
lust, desperation, immaturity, ignorance, pressure from others or a low
self-esteem make you blind to warning signs.

Keep your eyes open, and don't fool yourself that you can change
someone or that what you see as faults isn't really that important.

Once you decide to commit to someone, over time their flaws,
vulnerabilities, pet-peeves and differences will become more obvious.

If you love your mate and want the relationship to grow and evolve,
you've got to learn how to close one eye and not let every little thing bother
you.

You and your mate have many different expectations, emotional needs,
values, dreams, weaknesses and strengths.

You are two unique individual children of God who have decided to share
a life together.

Neither one of you is perfect, but are you perfect for each other?

Do you bring out the best in each other?

Do you compliment and compromise with each other, or do you compete,
compare and control?

What do you bring to the relationship?

Do you bring past relationships, past hurt, past
mistrust, past pain?

You can't take someone to the altar to alter them. You can't make
someone love you or make someone stay.

If you develop self-esteem, spiritual discernment, and "a life" you
won't find yourself making someone else responsible for your happiness or
responsible for your pain.

Manipulation, control, jealousy, neediness and selfishness are not the
ingredients of a thriving, healthy, loving and lasting relationship.

Seeking status, sex, and security are the wrong reasons to be in a
relationship.

WHAT KEEPS A RELATIONSHIP STRONG IS:

1. TRUST

2. COMMUNICATION

3. INTIMACY

4. A SENSE OF HUMOR

5. SHARING TASKS

6. SOME GETAWAY TIME WITHOUT BUSINESS OR CHILDREN

7. DAILY EXCHANGES (a meal, shared activity, a hug, a call, a touch, a
note)

8. SHARING COMMON GOALS AND INTERESTS

9. GIVING EACH OTHER SPACE TO GROW WITHOUT FEELING INSECURE

10. GIVING EACH OTHER A SENSE OF BELONGING AND ASSURANCES OF COMMITMENT

If these qualities are missing, the relationship will erode as
resentment, withdrawal, abuse, neglect, dishonesty and pain WILL replace the
passion.

" In order to move forward, you sometimes have to take a  step back"

Unless you have a specific reason to serve in Kaduna, I suggest you choose Abuja. It seems to be a popular choice for overseas graduates who choose to return home for their NYSC.

kajad:
Maki, I have sent it 2 you.
You know any of the babes

Any comments from Maki?

VOR:
Coco

Why do two people in a relationship have to be discrete about farting in front of each other.
I have never heard of anyone dieing from fart.

Some fart have been known to set off the smoke alarm.
So for those who think your lover's fart is Channel No.5
Beware!

michy:
Really u are from the coal city
are u in Nigeria

Yes I am.

gbengaijot:
@ rhea, , i am looking to gain weight as well, i have tried all your remedy, i wish they could help me to geain weight, but i didnt.
it got to a stage that my percentagee of junk food increased to 80- percent over a three month period and there wasnt any noticeable changes!

I suggest you go into body building. Start off on a mild note. A couple of push ups everyday. A bit of weight lifting (don't use excessive weights).

Back it up with increase in your beef intake (suya etc). In 2 monthos or less you should notice some changes.