Are we able to trust Chaka at this rate? Anyone with sincere thoughts on their fairly frequent downtimes?

Marriage should not be age dependent. But the patriarch all married younger wifes, I mean Abraham, Isaac and Jacob.

They also married submissive and hospitable wifes. Abraham could rush to Sarah and say "prepare a meal for visitors" in the evening, and she did not grumble or ask him to do it himself.

Marriage is not primarily about what the woman wants, every kind human will be interested in make the next person comfortable anyway. Marriage is actually about the woman who is now bearing your name, bending to your way of life, being submissive and finding out what the husband likes and wants. In the absence of this, this so-called marriages become legalized cohabitation or partnership where one person wants the comfort of Marriage, yet the freedom of being single. You cannot have it both ways.

It's easy for women to decide as they obviously see what they can put up with and what they cannot, but many ladies go ahead hoping they can either bend the guys rules, or even impose their ways on the man.

I am reminded of a guy who smokes and took his girl friend to clubs. The girl never brought up not smoking and not clubbing if they get married, yet after they had kids, she is nagging him to death about his smoking . She obviously assumed she can control him when she gets married.

Most importantly, one of the most important times when you need to be closest to God is when making a marriage decision. It is one of the most important decisions you will ever make. It can make you the happiest man on earth or leave you broken beyond human repair. Hold on to God pray, don't make any decision based on your human situation or circumstances. Introverted guys still marry young, kind, submissive and beautiful wifes.

If you read the above and follow through, you can come up with a decision.

God bless you.

If it the Nigerian Government, then follow the civil service policy.

If it is a private company, then follow your company policy, as every company have their own policy.

Mine count only working days, but subtract some public holidays.


All the best

AskNgige2:


That means we go soon start Jungle Justice..

If u are caught... Na fuel and tyre

Hi Chief . I said capital punishment, not jungle justice.

Killers had to be tried in Moses' day. There had to be two or three witnesses, and there were dedicated executioners.

Even manslaughter was not excused, they were however allowed to escape to a land of manslaughterers, and did not have to face death as it was mans slaughter.

Our modern legal system is based on the above law fine tuned into modern times, but are quickly drifting from God's standard. The wrath of God is coming on them. If Nigeria adopts their policy then I see a worsening of crime and I see convicted murderers being granted state pardon by corrupt leaders. For as it stands now very few governors are even signing off death sentence, but at least it leave murderers behind bars.

The God of the Jew is the only God there is and holds human life sacred. Its approximately 2000 years since those laws were given yet He has not changed His mind or His feeling about murders and taking a life we cannot create.


Kindest regards.

A killer deserves death as well . God is against blood shed, anyone opposing capital punishment is opposing God's rule.

They are your kids. Soon they'll become adults, and support will seize.

There is always a consequence for marrying the wrong spouse, and many times divorce or separation cannot solve the pain or strain that comes with that decision. Narcissistist ladies make it their ambition to poison the mind of their kids against their dads when separation happens. You may fund the children's housing and education, yet they look at you as the devil.

Men should never learn from their own experience, but should learn from the experience of others. Never marry a lady assuming she will change. Never say yes to a man hoping you can train him either.

In the end only God heal broken hearts, and out of seemingly chaotic situations Men and women who know God have become so successful, that funding their children's care becomes the very least of their trouble. People's ex send them regret messages hoping they can mend things when their ex partners make real quantum leaps in life. That's what you should pray for.

PonziHater

DeepSight:


Mostly fair points I would say, but still life is too complex and variegated for this simplicity. A man is like this, a woman is like that - my dear, the truth is that people are simply different from individual to individual, such that all of the various traits you touched upon can randomly be found in both single mother homes and dual parent homes, and in fact even in single father homes. In fact you will find such traits scattered among children of the same single mother home - i.e: in that same home, there will be an emotional child and there will be a stoic child.

That is the true natural complexity of people.

When it is suggested that children from single parent homes tend to be deviant, I would strongly suggest that greater attention is paid to the usual socio-economic difficulty that attends such homes, rather than the mere fact that they are single parent homes.

I used average man and average woman. And science and psychology has validated the facts. I cringe when i see women trying to teach men how to be men, especially when they have not worked in a man's shoe, and when women where actually made for men and not the other way round. A women will always do a bad job teaching a boy to be a man 100%, she is better off using that energy to train her daughters to the homely, caring and marriage fit, and not a feminist.

No matter the individual differences which I absolutely agree with, when averaged out, the differences are glaring. It takes a whole day highlighting this differences so I would not bore anyone

Should we ignore the glaring fact and Effects of Fatherlessness –

63% of all youth suicides,
70% of all teen pregnancies,
71% of all adolescent chemical/substance abusers,
80% of all prison inmates, and
90% of all homeless and runaway children, came from single mother homes.

Should we ignore the above empirical fact and chase the one woman that is stronger than the men in her village? The obvious choice is yours.

Finally this is what the bible instructs older women to do, this absolutely settles it for me:

"These older women must train the younger women to love their husbands and their children, to live wisely and be pure, to work in their homes, to do good, and to be submissive to their husbands"

PonziHater

If you allegedly crush people's motor cycles, close night and day time market, and make C of O millions of naira, and threaten to displace the poor from their own home, then you can only expect insecurity to worsen.

When leader make decision without thinking about the poor and needy, then expect the poor to revolt.

The North is far different from the south, where people shout more than act., or people see a wrong decision and say 'it will favour my family ".

Its time the government started paying real attention to the deprived mass of the society, which in reality makes up majority of people.

PonziHater

When people ask what if? They simply want to argue, and do no deserve an answer.

The average man is stronger, taller and more muscular than the average woman. However, there are some women who could be stronger than a man. The what if group focus on that one woman in their village that used to beat men up.

However, we know from science and sports that men and women should not compete together due to the average male being stronger than the average female.

The average female is emotional and more focused on love and emotion, that why a woman will mostly will stick to her child even though he is a murderer, rapist, drug addict, or fraudster. She will rather give all excuses for him, and even claim society failed him. That's the heart of the average woman. She is 100% loving, but truth and discipline is not her forte. Some women try to be hard on their children especially in the absence of a father, but they take the control to excessive form, they were not created for this, so never find a balance. Other just pamper their child to stupor.

The average man However is less emotional and more focused on truth and fact. That's why men take time to make decision, as opposed to women who can make instinctive decision.

A child, especially male needs a good balance of love and truth to navigate life appropriately. We say I know a man raised by a woman that ended up well, however most people saying ended up well, are only looking at life in terms of money, and think if you have money then you are balanced and have ended up well. That's how depraved our society has become, a society that measure people in terms of finances alone.

I know a big brother star with cars and houses, raised by a woman. He was all over the house crying like a woman at every instance. People say he ended up well, however he is not an emotionally balanced man, as men do not cry at the blink of an eyes. Another owner of a Nigerian movie streaming app always rushes to social media to either boast of his children school fees being high or taking x number of holidays, then ends up making an apology, people say he ended up well because he earns well, but his obvious gaffs are not masculine.


PonziHater

We don't have one in our church, if we did why not.

Obviously stabbing multiple times is not self defense. Both her and those who support those who take fellow lives, have blood on their hands.

People who took lives mistakenly were given the opportunity to flee to a land of fellow killers, whether manslaughter or not such people were to be ostracised from others. Until the priest was dead. However, murder meant instant death.

Nigeria is a land soiled with blood. People can see black and call it white for tribal, gender or other sentimental affiliation. If we don't repent, then we have a country with God's wrath boiling over it.

In same vein a man who abandones the vow he made to his spouse, and engages in extramarital sex is walking on a slippery slope, and in danger of suffering harm or even death.

PonziHater

BlackfyreRebell:
Please advice me
My ex husband and I are divorced 2 years ago. He recently acquired an European citizenship, he also wants to extend the citizenship to our son. Though I thought it a good idea but I can't shake the feeling that he is trying to use that to take him away from me.
He told me our son will need to come over there to finish the process of his citizenship. But when I went to submit the "application" what I saw on it is different from what he told me. The paper read that I am consenting to my son to go and reunite with his father. Or is that the way they process it?
Please those that have gone through same should please come to my aid, this is my only child and I can't afford to lose my child this way.

If you don't extend parental responsibility to the dad by signing above, then he is unlikely to be granted a visa.

He is also the father of your son. A boy without a father is a liability to the society. He needs a father as a compass to navigate the maze-hole of masculinity, as well as a mother to comfort him. No woman can teach a boy to be a man, as a woman has never walked in the shoes of a man.

If your ex is not a criminal, drug smuggler or dangerous person, I don't see why you are hiding his boy from him. His boy is the figure of his strength, his hope that his name will linger to the next generation.

All the best to your son, and the Lord be with him.

First fruit sounds like a Jewish custom. Gentile Christians were not burdened by any of the practices of Jews. No where are Christians asked to give first fruits or even tithe.

However, if you feel like tithing or giving first fruit very well go ahead. However all Christians should give cheerfully to things that sincerely advance the kingdom.

Christians are free to feast and free to fast, free to tithe and free not to, free to give first fruits and free not to. Never again should disciples of Christ bind themselves by any custom.

What Christians are However instructed to do is love their neighbour as themselves, flee sexual immorality, have respect for everyone, submit to authority, avoid pride, lies and boastfullness, lead a modest life and avoid food sacrificed to idols.

Christianity is ethical and not ritual based. You are no good giving all your money to God or to the poor, but being disrespectful or spiteful to your neighbour or disloyal to your spouse or a thorne in the flesh of your boss at work. True Christianity leads to a change of heart, and the way we live.

The cattle on a thousand hills belong to God, if He were hungry he'll slaughter some and have a feast. The most high God is definitely not out for our money.

PonziHater

Congrats great job

Wow great job from BAT. Allowing creatives lead their industry. In a previous dispensation a pharmacology professor was made director of arts and culture.

The God of the Jews is the only God there is, all other Gods are the figment of human imagination. Any believe that seeks to elevate man beyond being a creature is of the devil.

There is only one creator and God, we as humans are His subject and creation.

Trampling God under foot in a quest for higher power walking on a slippery slope.

Benin started the era of dishing out honorary PHD's to stars of questionable character or those who have barely stracthed the surface of making any impact. Cubana chief priest, Frodd, Tim Godfrey, Ik Ogbonna etc all recieved Honourary Doctorates, in an ideal world this shouldn't be.

Despite Hilary Clinton's exemplary career she only received a honorary Degree in 2021, and Lionel Richie in 2017. But Benin dishes out degree to big brother Naija participants.

Someday soon, when are the so called super stars fade and are remembered no more, only one star will remain, He is the bright and morning star, the king of glory, the saviour of my soul, and its the degree and award He gives me at the resurrection that matters most to me. Not these paper qualification that will burn when this old earth is consumed with fire. Because true History, is His story and not the distorted view men of this world dish out to outplay themselves.

Feminist and humanist will say "why doesn't he pack his own lunch, cooking is a survival skill". But they forget that woman was made for man and not the man for the woman. Leadership is male and will remain male. An unsubmissive wife is a wandering star on a collision course. She can seem to be making progress, but someday the Lord and Judge will set her right, and throw her into hell fire, silencing her nagging for eternity.

It's a moral universe and the earth is only for good people. One day unrepentant self seeking people who cheat, lie and cause pain to people will be found out. They will be thrown into the fire that will burn for eternity, shut out from God's new earth, facing evalasting torment and eternal separation from the King eternal and His chosen people.

To Him alone be glory, majesty, dominion and authority forever and ever. Amen

aremso:
Guys don't miss this FSR, this could turned big before the end of the year. Tesla was $1.05 in 2010



Your DD applies!

Happy new year Chief, all the best this new year.

mrjojo:
if you can't be vulnerable, poor in peace among your own family then maybe you need a new family.

True.

That's the culture of those whose real god is money. They claim to worship the most high, but their real allegiance is to the god called marmon.

We are where we are today because all our values have been substituted for money.

God have mercy!

Jega2000:
I made around 1.5 to 1.8million ...But I was only able to save 800k..

That's a lot of money save compared to how much made. May next year be better for you.

I currently have almost nothing saved, though I earned alot, but the new year bring much better for us all.

PonziHater

Giftedhand47:
I have a chronic anger problem I've tried not to get angry and overlook things but this demonic spirit will just do his thing
Pls help me i really need tips from Nairaland family.don't know I may get help here . Thanks

Demons don't need advise, they need casting out in Christs name and power.

Habits can be changed and you can make a resolution to break the habit by doing an anger fast. First for a few days, then 40days , then months.

Find out which you have and smash it head on.

PonziHater

Hope-filled

FanRong:
I'm sorry, this post is going to be a long one. But you're saving a soul if you read through and advice candidly.


My story
We've dated for 6months and we've lived together for the 6months.

On our 3rd month, I found her interesting and told her I'll like to marry her. She accepted but no engagement ring or anything to show. We just accepted by word of mouth.

Since then, I've worked towards it. I've told her to call her mum and eldest brother(dad is late) to relate my idea and understand their feeling since it won't be that easy to marry. (same state, but my people and her people are highly selective in marriage)

After several persuasion, and threat that I'll throw her out if she doesn't relate the circumstances to her family, she called the mum. And again I had to force her to call the eldest brother. She claimed she did. And that's enough. I'm ok.

Meanwhile, there's this guy(her ex) she claims helped her when she came to Lagos. It was when I started accommodating her that I found out in her chats that she was living with this guy, but lied to me she was living with her Aunt and the aunt's husband was harassing her sexually and she wants to leave. She later told me the guy, though provides for him but has never had sex with her, even when she was living in his house. These stories doesn't move me since everyone, who is not a virgin has an ex. So I forgave all that and we moved on.

She wasn't everything I need in a women, but I told myself I could train her the way I want. We continued adjusting to each others likes and dislikes.

I feed her this 6 months, provide comfortable shelter, buy her things she needs,(not want). Told her I'll do more and open a shop for her, if we get married, but she still confronts me asking why should I wait till after marriage? . I didn't allow the words move me cos Its my decision and my money and also, I'm used to gold diggers.

A good number of times, I see her as being selfish. If things doesn't benefit her, she'll not get bothered even if I'm involved.

Just this week, It became obvious to me that she argues everything I request her to do. From 24th Dec, we've been on holiday, we're always at home.
1. I'll wake her up at 9 and ask her to prepare breakfast for the family, she'll prefer to roll on the bed than do it. I'll finally have to do it myself so I can get things done and get busy.

2. I detest girls on eye lashes. I've repeatedly told her how I dislike it, but when she went to fix herself for the Christmas, she fixed the eyelashes, Contrary to my demand.

3. I got her some sneakers to upgrade her fashion style and look smarter, instead of the usual slippers and sandals she wears.
When we prepared to go to the beach few days ago, I requested her to put on the sneakers to look more fashionable, but she refused buttressing that she must wear what she wants, sandals.

4. Few days ago, we had a heated argument and she said that if I'm not happy that she's living with me, that she can go, afterall, she has somewhere to stay. I asked her to go and she immediately called that her ex bf to come to my house. I immediately swung into action, took all her belongings out, before the ex will arrive, at the same time, retrieving the items I gifted her.
While she was struggling to have her gifted items back, our neighbours heard the struggle and had to come and settle for us. She apologized and I forgave her. we were back into the house.

5. Just yesterday , we left home together, and I locked the door and I took the keys with me. We walked down the street together to the Busstop, I have almost no friend and seldomly greet. But there's this my ex girlfriend by the roadside, she saw me and yelled my name, I went to greet her and my Fiancée picked offence, left me without waiting for me. After that I chased her and told her it's nothing because I've told her everything about this ex.
Before we could get to the Busstop, she demanded for the house keys and I gave her since she might come back earlier than me.
We couldn't say bye. The anger was clear on her face and we parted ways.

After about 15mins, I got to where I wanted to make payment for the items I picked only to notice I am not with my transaction phone. I was confused where could I have kept it, the seller insisted I may not have come to his shop with the phone, and the phone rang as I called with my second phone. so I had to call my Fiancée for assistance since she's with the keys.
At first, she said she was still around the Busstop but when I told her I needed her to go home and confirm my phones whereabout, she said she can't go back that she has gone far, shouted on me and hung the phone.

I called and called and called, but she didn't pick. Many thoughts ran into me. Who took this phone? My money? , my phone? , my sim card? . I had to find my way and trekked back about 4km to the house since I had no cash with me. And finally saw the phone ringing in my house. I was relieved.

The way she shouted to me on the phone got me unbalanced, I felt she would be fire if I get this girl as a wife.

We finally traveled to our home state today and I paid the bills for the traveling. My major plan of traveling was to see her people and do the needful before I mistakenly get her pregnant. But I'm seriously contemplating of canceling this plan and throw her out come January. I need peace.

Dear nairalanders, I'm really in the middle of the deep blue sea and the devil.

I need mature and candid advice please.
Should I continue with the marriage plans or the redflags are obvious?

You are in the middle of nothing. Better go your way now, if you get married, you'll most likely be in for trouble. These odd entitled behaviour gets amplified in marriage.

All the best

Marriage is not a contract. It is a convenant with God as the principal witness.

Men are to love their wives sacrificially and unconditionally, and women are to submit to their husbands just as they would to God. One of the actual proof that a woman loves God is how she regards and treats her husband. Its easy to sing, shout and crying we love God, but the proof of loving God is how we treat others, even beyond family.

If these critical aspects are missing then both parties are in error and the marriage is on a slippery slope.

No one wants to talk about sacrificial and unconditional love anymore, while submission is now top most hated word, especially by women.

Jesus come!

PonziHater

Do whatever you want. You are not there to be a teacher to a man, but a wife and a help. If you feel you need to teach him or correct him frequently, because you believe you are wiser, then leave him alone, as he will have more peace. If whichever team he supports is biting you up and you can even go to the extent of asking him to change club then call it quit, as you will end up with another child at home that you think you can instruct and influence his decisions.

All the best you and him.

Long term investors think of a healthy mix of growth and dividend funds. The ultimate aim is getting to that stage where your dividends can cover your expenses. This requires patience, sacrifice and letting go of quick but risky trades.

Meanwhile, the uninformed day time traders think of making all the gains in one day only to loose it the next minute. It's taking 10 steps forward and 20 step backwards, over a decade you find yourself far behind from where you started.

Stay the course.

PonziHater

Naijagram:
Seeking your thoughts, everyone!!!

I work as a salaried individual and earn around 400k monthly.

However, my girlfriend constantly asks for money. I give her almost 100k every month and she feels it's not enough for her. She's even voiced discontent, suggesting I only send her money when she explicitly requests it.

I'm beginning to suspect her motives, as she seems solely focused on my income.

She never suggests saving or helps in cutting costs; her primary interest lies in spending everything.
Despite my genuine love for her, I can't keep up with her demands. I had hopes for our future together, but it seems unlikely now.

I'm considering a breakup as a solution.

Has anyone navigated a similar situation?

You know what to do boss. You probably need people to validate this.
Lucky she is your girlfriend, when she becomes a wife you'll have almost no one to run to for help.

God be with you.

Condolences. May the Lord comfort his family.

Donkogbe:
I decided to buy myself this gift for christmass and its means so much to me.

Congrats. Approximately one year ago, I bought an NIV bible, and was determined to read the pages of the new testament all through a day at a time. Boy! I never knew what lay in store for me. That alone changed my life and I believe forever. Now I have started from Genesis, and I hope to read the book all through again .

I suggest you read that great book one book at a time, to get its full story. Don't pick and choose verses as that quickly leads to misinformation, as you can proof anything by picking verses out of the overall context.

The God of the Jews is the God of the whole world and the only God there is. All other Gods her figment of human imagination.

To Him to glory, honour, majesty and authority forever.

I don't believe Christians should be celebrating Christmas. There is nothing to indicate that the early Church celebrated Christmas.

Both the book of Galatian and Colossians clearly states that Christians should not be observing calenders or special days. The sabbath law has been fulfilled in Christ and we are under no obligation to idolise a particular day. So celebrating Christmas negates the teaching of the early Church.

That said, I do not believe that those who don't celebrate have the right to impose their believe on those who do, and vice versa. We have been freed from religion and should never be dragged back to the legalism that comes with religion, nor be dragged into the licence that come with flesh and love for the world. What we need is the true liberty to be free from human rules and from the flesh, to serve the living God with the power of the Holy spirit that we have received freely.


We are baptised into one spirit and should maintain the Unity of that spirit until we attain the Unity of the faith.

May Christ alone be praised and celebrated every single day of the week, month and year.

PonziHater