₦airaland Forum

Ginaz:
yes, he has a big heart.

Very rare. Lucky wife.

Ginaz:
Some people doesn't even know the true meaning of love, I know its very hard to forgive a cheating partner but that's when love comes in. We're all humans, none is beyond temptation or below it. It can happen in any situations and a lot of things might trigger it.

Now let me give you an example of a lovely couple I had the chance of knowing, while trying to sort out my relationship problem I went to him for advise. What he asked me was, why are you truly in this relationship? What do you understand by forgiveness?

He told me a story about how when he was dating his wife, she cheated twice but he forgave her and helped her put an end to it. He said, he would have left her but for the sake of LOVE and what he saw in her far out weight any flaws. People called him stupid and foolish, but he never weaver. And today, he's the happiest man on earth because he's very happy with his 10 year marriage.
He said to me, you dont make love, you create it.

He said if he had left his wife, she would have lost herself and wouldn't have been the kind of woman she is today. When I see both of them, I see the meaning of the word love. Indeed, you can create love.

I left him feeling filled with wisdom, and I wanna take his advise seriously and apply it in my life. What I'm trying to say to whomever that is reading this, if your spouse cheated on you and is truly repentant, you should take them back. Love can do the impossible, I so much believe in that.

Marriage is not made up of two perfect creatures, NO! It is two imperfect creatures that makes it perfect. If your spouse is lacking behind, you can help them be a better person. Cheating is bad, I'm not supporting it but for those that are TRULY REPENTANT forgive. Afterall, God still cares for us upon all sins.

if your friends calls you fool and foolish cos you're thinking of taking that poor girl that has been begging for forgiveness, you are the one that is a fool. Cos you are not man enough to be a man of your own self.

Your saying love is "overlooking the flaws of someone". What if my flaw was not being able to forgive and her flaw was cheating. COMPATIBILITY is just as important as love. The guy you mentioned, forgiveness was his strength. So his strength compensated for her flaws. I'm pretty sure it was vice versa too. Imagine if both of them had the problem of cheating, wouldn't the relationship br pointless? I advise COMPATIBILITY then LOVE.

The phrase "my daughter's mother" means ME (if I were female). Then saying Teresa's daughter is "my daughter's mother" means Teresa's daughter is ME (answer is C, I am Teresa's daughter). No long story.

JustTara:
you know. I have a friend who's a big time player, he has sooooo many girls. And most of them know he's a playing asshole. This post summarizes one reason why they are with him irrespective of who he is. Sounds dumb right? A point to note though is that while making a post, I write with the first person narrative. So whether it's me or not, my readers will never know.

True. My response was based on the the reason given in the post. The world isn't 1 dimensional. There are different reasons for an action, you get? Some girls do bad boys because he's adventurous, some do it for his drama (these set of girls get easily bored), some girls for his sweet lyrics (a good flirt turns them on), some for his experience in boinking ( he has been with loads) etc. I think majority of girls especially the sharp ones do it for the thrill BUT don't get emotionally attached (the naive ones commit to bad boys). In essence, they just using him like he's using them i.e. the feeling is mutual. At the end, the part ways, no strings attached. I'm experienced, so I know at a certain stage, girls just wanna have fun. Unlike nice guys that wanna "love" and be "loved". Nice guys make the worst wingmen, they ruin the mysterious vibe. They need to save the cling for their wives. HAVE FUN DAMMIT!

Because "romance" involves money being spent on her to make her feel "special". At the end of the day, she gets both, your money first, then your shlong. You'll be there thinking you hammered.

Another thing, can people just answer the bloody question?! If you don't wanna, why bother coming here to be useless?

LISTEN OP! I get where you're heading at:

The nice guys always give the "you are special to me" right from the get go, like they do to every girl they meet. They're emotionally cheap. They seem weak and emotionally submissive to every single attractive women they like. Females who are always surrounded by the nice guys (i.e. the hot girls) don't value them because just like the nice guys, the hot females what someone who's hard to get. It's natural that we all want someone that will make us say "DAMN! I must be special for someone like this to commit to me".

This is were your thread comes off as shallow...no offense. You sound SUPER NAIVE to think changing a "bad boy" is what makes you special. That shows you have low self-esteem. What makes you special is the work you put into yourself, your goals, your achievements, knowing you have family and real friends that love the REAL you, the positive impacts you have on people around etc. I tell people, if you need to be in a relationship to feel special then it means you know you're NOT SPECIAL. That goes for the "nice guys" too. When you finally turn the bad guy to a nice guy, the relationship is technically over because you got into the relationship to change him. The challenge is over, it gets boring, then you want to meet another bad boy to transform. Be in a relationship for companionship not validation of your worth.

LISTEN OP, I personally advice you start seeing someone else...or even more (as in, date ). Usually the main reason people find it hard to break up from an even bad relationship is FEAR OF LONELINESS. A part of you two doesn't wanna start from the scratch again. You keep telling yourself "but we've come this far". I advice you to become very social with other girls because you can't just tell yourself "there are many fishes in the sea". That won't do much. You have to make yourself know FOR A FACT there are other babes.

Good luck.

DebbyChris:
A fat lady turned down your proposal no wonder you came here to pour your frustration. Have you ever created anything? That u are here condeming God's creation.

Please stop all this talk. God created ADAM AND EVE and said THEY SHOULD MULTIPLE. Stop accusing God for people's laziness. It is human nature to find too much of something repulsive. If you fall into the "too fat" category, it's up to you to say "I want to lose weight, I want to be more attractive".

I was very very skinny (plus the tallness again) growing up. When the opportunity to gym came my way, I took it. Now I look better than I was (still not there tho). It's about setting goals and accomplishing them.

I doubt you'll care if a broke guy is chyking you and says "What's this attitude for now? God made me like this. Stop condemning God's creation and accept me for me".

OP, it's naij girls. They still backwards...no offense. In Jand, it's pretty normal. In fact, the naij girls there had to adapt and turn up back when I was in uni. It's just like you mentioned, they don't throw themselves at you and be like "you're really hot, I want you" NAH! They become friendly by making eye contact and saying "hello" when they see you, SIMPLE! As a sharp guyz you'll go with the flow because she has built a welcoming atmosphere. No awkwardness, no pressure.

Naij girls underestimate the power of "hi" and a smile. Look it up, the idea of hard-to-get is about not agreeing easily to dates, sex or not being readily available. Hard-to-get has nothing to do with being FREAKIN RUDE. RAZZ GIRLS!!!

It's the law. How can he be sentenced without solid evidence?

Judging from his reaction when he caught 'em in the act, he doesn't or can't satisfy her. Probably doesn't even love her because, obviously, love is jealous.

Also, judging from the fact that she committed suicide, she was suffering from extreme guilt. This means she had values, she knew adultery was an utterly shameful act and in fact, she loved her husband. But konji nah bastad...THE KONJI WAS DEEEEEEEEEEEEP!

Whatz ma point sef?!

Yeah, the law should be unbiased and fair in dealing with domestic violence.

LISTEN THO! This only works when you made a good first impression (well dressed, scent, posture etc)...and she's single. Guys never want to understand an attractive babe already has a main nigga, side niggas and friendzoned niggas. Please tell me the magic you wanna pull off that would make you her number 1. Always remember you're joining a queue and more guys will join behind you. At the end of the day, whether you like it or not, she's gonna do the choosing no matter how wicked your game is.

If you are already in the friendzone because you were being HER FRIEND, forget it bro. You've lost that sex appeal, you're like a brother now (except she's not very attractive and you are a good catch to her, try your luck). Next time, start your game from the 1st time you meet. From the very 1st time you meet her and you are attracted to her (at this stage, no emotional attachment ), tell yourself "let's see if she's attracted to ME, if she flows with ME, if she gets MY jokes, if she enjoys MY company". BE THE SUBJECT!!! Forget about showing her you're interested, one million other guys are.

Mistakes guys make is they make it about HER at the first time, which makes them attached to her not the other way around. Asking her 101 questions, interviewing her: "do you like this place?" "which song do you like?" "what do you think about what happened to Tonto Dike yesterday?" "are you enjoying your food?" "when are you going home?" FORGET QUESTIONS! Most of the time talk about you. "I love this song the DJ is playing", "I remember when I was...", "I find that funny because...", "I can cook better than what they're serving", "I loved today's sermon, especially the part about...", "i find you very shy" (good one if she's forming), "I heard Will Smith punched Pete Edochie", "I've never had this kinda birthday...". Let her be the one to comment, disagree, ask questions etc If she's not flowing with you, MOVE ON!

When she's flowing with you, cut it short so you leave her wanting more, get her number. Then follow OP's tips after making a confam 1st impression.

AmakaDNBStories:
It was more a fun comment.

Ah! My bad.

AmakaDNBStories:
I'm just being practical ... If I like a man, chances are there other women that like him too. The reason behind the attraction is not important. What's more important is to be sure you are on the top of the list. Same goes for ladies too.

I get you. I'm just wondering why KNOWING other women are after your man is essential to the relationship (your comment I initially replied). Perhaps, you love the thrill. Enjoy!

AmakaDNBStories:
If I'm attracted to him, most likely other women are too. Knowing this, I will be more patient with him.

So you're only down with the typical good looking, made men. Hope you know men who fit in that category can't be held down, too many babes. So, yeah, you'll get your wish and have a hell of a ride...that's if your his main chick tho.

AmakaDNBStories:
Kinda true though...oops! Can't bliv I just said that. But really it is the accusations and drama that spice up the relationship. Can't date a man no woman wants.

So you prefer a relationship that's doomed to fail. Female logic...SIGH!

So its not primarily who you're attracted to but who other women chase. You'll have a very happy marriage.

Nothing ruins a marriage more than a hubby's brokeness or a wife's overstretched coochie. Haven't you noticed men are more likely to cheat after she has had kids cos her cooch has been mutilated beyond recovery. Now imagine this happening at the start of the marriage cos in the past, she loved riding huge ones regs (I wonder why they never care about the damage s). The marriage would be a DISASTER! For guys on the other hand, money can be regained and there are meds for low sperm count.

Poor girls. Keep riding ehn. Enjoy it well.

You niggas and ass. So, because she has a big ass, we should forget that she might have:
- an ugly face
- bad body odour
- bad mouth odour
- tiny sagging breasts
- a potbelly
- horrible dentition
- a repulsive hairdo

Because of "big yansh" she makes a perfectly attractive woman, abi?

I never understand why you African men think like this...NEVER!

So, she should basically turn to an actress for you? Dude, you're on your own.

Joy1706:
I agree. I'm proud of it

Lmao. You're such an attention whor£.

Funny thing is when I treat a female friend like a "homie" and show zero attraction or zero intention she starts showing disappointment. It's very obvious when I'm on her finer friend's 'p'. Why should you be jealous when we just friends? She'll now be cockblocking me and her friend, start being aggressive about little things. I've cut most of em off. Maybe like two very matured female friends left.

If you're wondering and even asking strangers which one to pick them, then I suggest you choose neither. When you meet YOUR OTHER HALF (not an option) you won't come down here to put a life changing decision in the hands of strangers. Every cell in your body will want only her.

About the mannered one though, you'll never know the true nature of someone when they're dependent on you or put you on a pedestal (submissive). When they upgrade and know they can do without you, that's when the real personality shows. There's more to a wife than doing house chores. You need someone you can spend all day with or else the marriage will get boring real fast. Then frustration sets in. She'll be those weak, dependent wives you can slap around the house and get away with. Boredom ruins almost all relationships and marriages. Choose companionship.

I'm too huge for condoms...So I wrap my huge shlong with nylon bag and tape it tight. It's been working so far.

redgem:
Lol.... Just see who is talking!!! Hahaha smh

Listen to the message not the messenger. Hearken to my wise words and save yourself. A word is enough...

Asking for a "real man" when you a just a typical relationship-dependent small girl makes you come off as very selfish. Are you perfect yourself? You deserve a "real man" but does a "real man" deserve you? Cause some razz desperate boys toast you on your street abi, you're now feeling classy with yourself.

I pity all you little girls always needing some pointless relationship because it's too hard for you to close your legs. Wasting your bloody time and getting distracted instead of working on being the best version of yourself before it's time to settle down. GUYS GUYS GUYS!!! Go n si' down my friend and face your studies!

BeastOfNoNation:
Okay. I agree 100% with your explanation. A relationship is a partnership based on mutual respect, emotional attachment, Sex (Before nko?), being each other's best friend, and GOOD TIMES

DAMMIT, GIRL! Are we soul mates? I crave a rare kind.

BeastOfNoNation:
Of course intellectualism is part of the traits that are appealing in guys but it doesn't seem to be the other way round in regards to women

And I also don't want to think Hollywood because it's not reality. There are many women who work and have good relationships and marriages. I have a question for you too. would YOU prefer a girl who is smart and goals-driven or would you rather feel dominant in a relationship where the girl is emotionally and financially dependent on you?

*Heads up. I'm not attacking you at allll! just curious to know your answer

WHAT?! Sharp guys know the value of intelligent women. We know the value of simply talking and falling into the depth of the persons mind.

Yeah, nowadays there are loads of hustling women. I'm happy for them not only because they're making their money but because they are more respectable. They attract only equally respectable men, the fake guys get intimidated easily.

Good question. At this stage of my life I can't be dating a financially dependent chick. About being emotionally dependent, both parties have to be or else it won't feel like a relationship. Although, males tend to be more sexual than emotional unlike females. So I'll say, a working, ambitious babe who's emotionally...and sexually () dependent on moi. Best combo!

Gimme your own combo.

forix4u:
U b guy wey sabi jare no mind dat johnydon wey dey form caring man like say him get iron dick. Well, sha among all d ladies I've meet only dis one girl has refused to orgasms no matter how much I tried so I'd to give it up abeg I won't kill myself over a woman pls. I later understood d easiest way to make a woman come is "feeling" simple u don't need to do much work. She seeing u alone or a tough can even mk her come. Its that simple

Yeah, making her feeling emotional. Ma guy, they too complex. I don tire.

BeastOfNoNation:
I also commend you for arguing logically and respectfully. you have a point but Feminism is still very important. Misandry and Misogyny should be completely eradicated from all societies.

On an additional note, I suppose Nigeria's backwardness is too complex. I personally do not dedicate my entire life to fighting the for the Feminist Movement because Nigeria has bigger problems BUT I am still a feminist. If everyone was feminist, there would be no reason for women to shout FEMALE INEQUALITY because it wouldn't be a problem. Also please Sir when you see a woman, try not to assume that she is without ambition because she knows about the last episode of the kardashians. That same woman may know every single detail of the current oil crisis and may better Nigeria in the future.

I have enjoyed this argument so far.

I get you and I'm pretty sure I would have been a feminist if I was Swedish. Maybe in Sweden, women are enjoying equal rights in workplaces because women are equally driven professionally NOT because they simply ranted about it on YouTube lol. Hope you get my point.

You sef, you should know your fellow naija gals and being typically too dependent on her man. Feminist movement in naij is a big joke on a crack ya ribs level lol. No offense. This brings me to a good question though. In Nigeria, do you think women being equally financially capable will be good for relationships/marriages? Think Hollywood before you answer.

Do you find smart guys like me attractive? I mean, a guy that can challenge you the way I'm doing now has to be appealing somehow.

forix4u:
Which one b squirting again na Guy abeg notin concern me weather woman come abeg... If she life make she cumme if she like make she go all I care if fire her down well till I sweat all d water for me body finish. Simpke!!! Women wey one d*ick no dey reach dem....mtceeeew!!! That she cummes means she won't go service another dude with d higher pay Abegi leave

Abi o! How many men don suffer heart attack on top kerewa? I'll tell her straight up "l'm giving you 20 pumps tonight. You better be almost there!" Na by force?

ribbit:
suqirting is not climax and can be faked too after drinking liquid ...

Lol. Then the last option is asking her at gunpoint or using a lie detector.

forix4u:
Don't bliv dt abeg... Thou I've never heard of dat b4 but I'm 100% sure it can also b faked ok. So u mean to say no reflect action can b faked Lies... My ex dat I knw very well I always no wen she comes n wen she doesn't. One best n easiest way is she feels very tired to even stand up or sleeps off, or staggers if she tries to take a walk immediately.. Simple method, hard to fake any of dos.

Lmao! I'm pretty sure she knew you knew when she really came. Then she started faking falling asleep, feeling tired and staggering. My guy, everything can be faked except squirting. Only 100% confirmation.