₦airaland Forum

@OP, ARE YOU TRYING TO MAKE AN INVESTMENT OF HER?? U guys never learn. I have said it here: INVEST IN A WIFE, AND NOT A GIRLFRIEND. Do not feel you have any sort of responsibility toward a girlfriend. Her parents brought her to de world, and have dat sole responsibility. That's why most of you will continue to be termed mugu, maga, etc, cos u don't hear.

Lol. See them advertizing themselves. . NAIRALAND.
@OP, these days, QUALITY is not seen/determined by the way a lady dresses, hairdo, church going, make-up or lack of it, prayer warrior, etc. Remember: Man looks @ de outward appearance, GOD looks @ de heart. Involve Him in ur search & let Him direct you. Cos so many things hav gone wrong- an innocent look no longer means innocence, where teenagers can sleep wit old men & LOOK innocent. So be not deceived. Take time to study anyone dat catches ur interest-do not be carried away by physical beauty. Never let ur feelings show. Hide it at first. Also interact wit the person. DO NOT come off at first as searching-everyone wil start pretending around you. Try to be just friends with girls. That way u get to know them well.

mikuz:
And you're the chief mumu!!
DID I TELL YOU I AM MORE INTELLIGENT THAN HE IS?
Can't i advice someone who's more intelligent than i am?
There's also a thin line between knowledge and wisdom!

Since u know u're not more intelligent, next time don't point accusing finger at someone's mistake when u're not better.

mikuz:
@OP
what your peers have been saying about you might be true! I think you overhype yourself. Someone must have been deceiving you! Making you believe that you are more intelligent than you really are. The truth is, you are not that INTELLIGENT as you think(no offense).
Ask my why.
How come you spelt "mixed" as "missed"?
*don't tell me it's a mistake 'cause i aint going to fall for it*
matter of fact you remind me of an acronym in school-ITK!
Don't get me wrong i aint tryna say i am more INTELLIGENT than you with this post,but the truth has to be told!
Check your post, maybe this is where your problem is emanating from : you're elevating yourself higher than you really are.(you aint that brilliant as you and peeps around you believe ok?)
*smh*

Daft comment

49cents:
Yet every 'Hero/heroine" demands/craves 100% from spouse later as though a leopard will suddenly loose their spot because a ring was slipped down the finger SMH

so true. There's no high value attached to cheap commodities.

@OP, THERE WILL BE NO 'iku aka n'uzo' IF YOUR PARENTS HAVE NOT GIVEN THEIR BLESSING. So, FOR HIM TO BE COMING MEANS THEY HAVE AGREED. SO, WAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE DE ONLY ONE AGAINST IT.

@OP, THERE WILL BE NO 'iku aka n'uzo' IF YOUR PARENTS HAVE NOT GIVEN THEIR BLESSING. So, FOR HIM TO BE COMING MEANS THEY HAVE AGREED. SO, WAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT. LOOKS LIKE YOU'RE DE ONLY ONE AGAINST IT.

@OP, THERE WILL BE NO 'iku aka n'uzo' IF YOUR PARENTS HAVE NOT GIVEN THEIR BLESSING. So, FOR HIM TO BE COMING MEANS THEY HAVE AGREED. SO, WAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT.

Zahnda:
Do what makes you happy dude. Even with the best intentions, life happens, poo happens. A marriage shouldn't be a hostage situation. Walk.

''A marriage shouldn't be a hostage situation, ,'' bla bla bla. Are u right in de head?? Was he in chains wen he took her to the altar before God? Now you want him to commit a great sin before God by abandoning his family-when his wife has not in any way been unfaithful to him?? It is statements like dis that make me question de sanity of some african countries where 'civilization' has eaten up every fibre of dignity!

Beaf:
I thought these primitive "prayers" ended with the equally primitive CPC pogroms in the North.
We used to have decent conversations before the election season brought in a bunch of intellectual queers. But hey! Every village has its fool.

I tell u my brother, some tongues are so loose they re almost falling off. Lol.

enyojo:
[size=15pt] @BEAF, May your life be transformed d way you are sure GEJ will transform Nigeria- Good or Bad.
If u get liver say AMEN[/size]

Is this the same person that said, May someone's life be rigged the way he helped rig election

MsSophista:
OP
What strength of character for a MAN to get help when he is struggling!!!!! How many others would pursue this and feast at the table of sin? Well, my husband did and now he is begging daily to be reunited. Like him, I also advise you to pray and get with the christian brothers for support. Your wife should know if she is a praying, mature woman. But we all face temptation even Jesus did, but we don't have to partake. Believe me the grass is not always greener on the other side and stolen melons is sweet for a brief moment. Once you have bitten into that forbidden fruit the effects are universal and for a lifetime. Draw closer to your wife, spice up your marriage. God's spirit and anointing will even be with you in your times of intimacy. Yes, pray works and God has given us the Holy Spirit, the Comforter, to come along side of us to help us in ANY matter. Every christian on this forum who has faith should be praying and agreeing that this man, his marriage, and seed/child be kept from the trappings of a seductive spirit and be preserved for God's glory. In Jesus' name. Amen!

Amen Amen Amen. But, have you reconciled with your husband? Pls if u are a christian like u profess, find a place in ur heart to forgive like Christ himself will do. It's indeed painful, BUT, , ,Make him sweat a bit, so he'll learn to appreciate wat he has, but for ur sake and the children, forgive.

Boxer007:
only if you are offering: YES

YES to hit & run, or YES u mean it? Lol

Boxer007:
I wish I could find a good wifey material from Nairaland

Really? Or u mean hit & run?

By the way, where is mobo?

SIN ke? Or u mean CRIME? Hmmmmmm

sbeezy8:
lol where is stillwater I said some igbo babes get big egos and like to hear thing like " yea yoruba guys like marrying igbo babes". HAHAH

Yoruba guys like babes in general they dont even care to look for particualar tribe cause they can date a yoruba chick, calibar gal, urhobo babe, ijaw, American lady or ANY babe and do the same thing.

and I dont know any guy that is "given an inch and wont take more" - that is any non homo guy.

I dont blame chicks tho yoruba guys talk ALOT of shiot to get or try to get with babes. If a yoruba guy is dating an igbo babe he'll say all types of shiot like

" ohh beautiful igbo gals blah blah you knw i wanna marry an igbo gal"
If he dates a urhobo chick he'll say " yea mehn you urhobo babes are too much and very beautiful blah blah we go live in sapele our first pikin name go be efe"
etc.

Im a yoruba guy I DO IT ALL THE TIME.

QUIT TRYING TO SAVE FACE. THAT IS THE BLUNT TRUTH. I AIN'T TALKING ABOUT 2 WEEKS, 1 MONTH, BUT YEARS HERE, AND WIT MARRIAGE ON THE CARDS. SEE YOU. IF U WONT LIE, YOU KNOW WHY U LOVE IGBO LADIES. I DONT HAVE ANY GLORIFIED EGO. BUT YOU DO. QUIT SAVING FACE AND SPEAK DE TRUTH. LOL.

deniyor:
Wake up and stop dreaming

Na you dey dream. Lol

@OP, YOU HAVE LOW SELF ESTEEM. AND YOU SOUND LIKE THE TYPE THAT DONT LISTEN TO SOUND ADVICE, BUT WILL WAIT TO EXPERIENCE HEADACHES IN MARRIAGE BEFORE THEIR SENSES COME BACK. IF AFTER EVERYONE HAS GIVEN YOU SOUND ADVICE, YOU DECIDE TO ALLOW ENVIRONMENT, WHAT PEOPLE WILL SAY, I DONT WANNA BE SINGLE AGAIN BECLOUD YOUR SENSE OF REASONING, THEN YOU DESERVE WHATEVER YOU GET. Your cousins etc have stable relationships, is yours stable? Why do you compare yourself to them? Are their boyfriends your boyfriend? Someone degrades you, and you come here sayin he cares, he's nice.lol. PLS MARRY HIM YOU HEAR?? BUT MAKE SURE IF AT ALL THIS CONTINUES, TAKE IT TO UR MUM AND COUSINS AND ALL AROUND YOU, AND SLAP YOURSELF. I hate it wen people are given eyes to see, ears to hear and brain to reason, yet behave like, , SMH

Thank you @190. It's indeed a pity that foreign men appreciate and value Nigerian women, while some of our own men dont. They bad mouth us, yet think highly of themselves. If it's so much paining some of you guys, why do u stil come back from ur 'travels' to marry your women? Smhidatr

190:
[color=deeppink]Hope u aint trying to bash the female gender here

cos most times, i tend to think its a global problem and not necessarily directed towards one of the gender

I would like to date a lady for at least a year before thinkin of marrying her

she could have other idea's but i guess the innocence was what sustained our parents marriages

rite now, the males and the female go head on head on who should be the head of the house and this result in such relationships

hitting the rocks  [/color]

Also, wat is supposed to be enjoyed IN marriage is enjoyed OUT OF it, cooking,cleaning, wat have u, So, wat makes it intriguing or new?
Thirdly, the full understanding of or respect toward marriage doesn't seem to be there.
Fourth, we marry for the wrong reasons- she's busty, fat behind, figure eight, etc. And not for quality-can keep house and home, from a good, reputable family, respectful,etc.

190:
^excuse me sir,

I dont know what side u woke up on today

But this thread is an insult to Nigerian women

Thank you.

REALITY101:
Ladies do you really need to offer your choochie to a brother simply because he gave you a ride? ^Thank you^ should be enough. SMH @ Ladies love for flashy car's + handsome homies. Don't ask me who please

Though dat's uncalled for, maybe u should consider/say she likes you and not cos of de ride. Smh

tosyne09:
I'm in a frdship like relatnshpwh started last year. I n d gal in questn ar in same skul.I've neva bn to her hostel but each time i called her dat i want to see her, she would find d time no mata wot to see me. sm days bk now she told me she needed sm money of wh i tried as much as posble to get d money 4 her. Now she needed anoda cash. I told her dat am a stdnt just like her n she said, 'i just want u to know my problem not dat u're obligated to me'. Evritin i did 4 her includn d text n cal, she has a way of appreciatn them n if i do not cal her 4 sm days, she would say am not a true frd. D issue is dis,each time we meet she's use to saying dis "if she does not say am frustrating, she would say am 2 local n to worsn d situatn she may said, i should GROW UP". To thoes dat hv bn in reltnship 4 long or had sm experience.Pls help me unravel al dis statements above. Wot does she want?

FRUSTRATING: I dont know wat to do wit u. Am not in a 'normal' relationship here.
LOCAL: U dont bring light. U dont do wat ur fellow guys do, u're not current. No spending, no swags.
GROW UP: If u wanna be in a relationship, get to know how other guys treat girls & do same to me.
Young man, pls face ur studies, u dont need any negative distractions. U dont need such derogatory words: if she wants a made & ready-to-spend man, she should find one.

@OP, Ask ur mum. I believ she'll tell u why, de type to approach and how u approach them to avoid embarrassment. LOL

@OP, Ur husband is probably still bitter he wasn't de one u gave yourself to first, instead it was to SOMEONE HE KNOWS. Seeing such person or remembering their face could play a real trick on the mind. In his sub conscious he hasn't really forgotten/ completely forgiven you for dat. If it had been wit someone he doesn't know, it would hav been totally different, but with a familiar figure? Could be tricky. Men have ego. He still hates it being someone he knows, and probably feels small anytime he sees de guy. That is why it is not wise/advisable to re-enter a relationship where such mistakes hav been made. Cos, even if de man says he has forgiven, dat is his mouth talking. His sub conscious? Another matter.