vivian chinaza:

You know what? You are right! I want my man to be a man, the same way he wants me to be a woman.
But the only way this would work is when we forget who and what we are, especially in private, and just seek to make each other happy.
But for a man to come in here, and beat his chest in pride? I'm gonna bring him down to his kneels, with every strength of a woman in me. And when I do, I'm gonna tell him then kick him out.

baba dey:

Wow and wow again.... Sorry for ma inquisition madamoiselle, Are you from Mbaise,imo state?

baba dey: "I'M GONNA BRING HIM DOWN TO HIS KNEELS, WITH EVERY STRENGHT OF A WOMAN IN ME. AND WHEN I DO, I'M GONNA TELL HIM THEN KICK HIM OUT"

That's what is wowing me.

vivian chinaza:

You know what? You are right! I want my man to be a man, the same way he wants me to be a woman.
But the only way this would work is when we forget who and what we are, especially in private, and just seek to make each other happy.
But for a man to come in here, and beat his chest in pride? I'm gonna bring him down to his kneels, with every strength of a woman in me. And when I do, I'm gonna tell him then kick him out.

IZUKWU: and that's what marriage should be about? Do me, i do you ?

Fhemmmy: I have done it oh . . . Doing that does not make me less of a man.

vivian chinaza:

oh u bet I will!
But fortunately, I'm also stuck with guys who don't give me the reason to.
I'm also stuck with guys who help me clean my shoes, paint my nails, do MY LAUNDRY and comb my hair once in while. So I don't need to bother myself about bringing them down. I just bother myself about loving them more and giving anything in the world to make them happy.

vivian chinaza:

Izu, I don't know ok, I'm not married, never been married. But one thing I know is, I cannot always be at the receiving end, ok.
I know men have ego, pride and all and it is my duty to protect those, same way it is his duty to protect my vulnerability. But we can't do this if we don't completely trust each other ok.

Most times men let pride and ego get into the way, I understand they are wired that way, but I'd be more forgiving if letting this pride come in the way is unintentional. But when a man intentionally beats his chest in pride for me? I'm gonna stick with this proverb then; ita m aru n'isi na asoghi ntutu m, aga m ata gi aru n'ike na asoghi nshi gi. I'm sure u understand that, sweetheart. *winks*

IZUKWU: i hear you,i have come of age and i know my people are expecting to bring the person and even me too have begin to look at my female friends beneath the facade and see the substance. I would not be comfortable continuing a r/ship bond for the alter with you , if i overhear you state the above, have backlisted a ladyfriend last feb. Because of a similar statement,she said if she ever caught with another woman ,she would burst bottle for my head. The statement caused to kill wherever the the association was heading to,despite many calls from her, my heart has grown cold. I need someone who would calm me,when am hot,not who will stoke the fire and drag headship with me.

vivian chinaza: And again, I do not want to be an "alter-bound" relationship kinda girl, I want to be a "happy-bound" relationship kinda girl where the man will set his ego aside.

Come to think of it, why are igbo guys obsessed with "headship?" in marriage?

Exponental: Never have I, and never will I. My ego still overrides even wen I'm wrong and she' right.

chikk:

Will make a good topic for a new thread. Try it and you'll find out why

alutacontinua:

I pity your wife or wife-to-be! SMH...seriously, do you guys think we don't have feelings or ego too? What do you even take ladies for? Even our grandfathers would do better than this, i guess!

vivian chinaza:

That is eh, if u follow wetin these guys dey yarn for NL, you will never be good to any man out there.

vivian chinaza:

But seriously, am I the only one that has noticed?

chikk:

Well, I don't think its just Igbos. We're Africans and no matter what western culture or mentality we borrow/adopt, somethings can't just change.

Both in tradition and religion, Women are supposed/expected to be submissive. They submit to their men and that makes them(men) the 'head'. Its just how it is, tho' that doesn't mean that women should cower at their men and/sell their rights out o.

vivian chinaza:

I completely agree with you.

But are you saying a man kneeling for a woman when its necessary makes his less a man and less 'head' of a family?

And I don't think you understand me. Men have ego and pride, I dispute that fact. But igbo guys are obsessed with "headship." I igbo too, but I stay in the niger/delta region and their men are not like that.

Do you know what an igbo guy told me? He was asking for my hand in marriage, so we got talking and he told that I cannot bring any of my properties to 'HIS' house. That whatever property that I have should be left in my parents house. *emphasis on HIS o*
Can you imagine that this guy's ego wouldn't let him stomach the feeling that maybe me bringing my properties would mean dragging the 'headship' with him.
I just kept quiet while he went on and on, when he was done, I told him NOT A CHANCE IN HELL!

Donalð Genes:


I know when we men are sooo Hot,we can do anythinq just enter there pants....its not easy quys...punny is the most powerful tin that can pull a man down if Not The Grace of God mehn

vivian chinaza: And again, I do not want to be an "alter-bound" relationship kinda girl, I want to be a "happy-bound" relationship kinda girl where the man will set his ego aside.

Come to think of it, why are igbo guys obsessed with "headship?" in marriage?

alutacontinua:

vivian chinaza:

babe, you check that kind thing na, e good?

vivian chinaza:

I completely agree with you.

But are you saying a man kneeling for a woman when its necessary makes his less a man and less 'head' of a family?


And I don't think you understand me. Men have ego and pride, I dispute that fact. But igbo guys are obsessed with "headship." I igbo too, but I stay in the niger/delta region and their men are not like that.

Do you know what an igbo guy told me? He was asking for my hand in marriage, so we got talking and he told that I cannot bring any of my properties to 'HIS' house. That whatever property that I have should be left in my parents house. *emphasis on HIS o*
Can you imagine that this guy's ego wouldn't let him stomach the feeling that maybe me bringing my properties would mean dragging the 'headship' with him.
I just kept quiet while he went on and on, when he was done, I told him NOT A CHANCE IN HELL!