3cycle:
sorry but not all women get there by sleeping with every dik and harry
I suggest you upgrade ans stop working in a brothel

I saw u there that is why I quote u.

Mondisweets: so are you going to be one of those "not so rich guys" that will add misery to these women's lives?

I actually dont get that question.

Mondisweets: exactly what you said. She is raised and taught on how to become a good mother and wife, but later she will be expected to be a career driven woman, who somehow has superpowers to balance everything out.

abi o..this life is kinda complicated o...

jpphilips:

Market buisness does not bring the money that runs the home, it just supports and keeps the woman busy,it is a form of enterprenuer ship where the woman has time for the kids, she can decide when to sell, where and how to sell, she can decide to leave shop to go get the kids, she can as well leave the shop to go make food for her husband, is that what you are comparing with our present day office jobs?
So as my employee, you seriously think you will get those luxury while on my pay roll? bros; how old are you?

where the husband is incapacitated like the case of your grad father, the wife can step in, but the onus here is that the intervention will be absolutely unnecessary if your grand dad was upto your dad's fees. The Op seem not to understand the challenges of independent young women.

you just said at least the market money keeps up,I used the market as an argument for women having something to offer in those days. ... yea , fine.these days there are women doing big in their business thats helps to settle bills . I mean pay feees of children abroad.... I can seee life has given you hard knock. yes my grandfather might not be so rich but he could comfortably have taken care of his kids , with the assistance of his wife they were able to do something better to make a better generation. oga , not every one will be rich , it takes the help of ur partner to make you generation better ... no dey talk like say you have all it takes to care of ten generations to come.

Wooooooow!

Not a great society to live in...smart women will organize and raise their daughter to b independent minded!

Mondisweets: its hard out there for a woman trust me!

it aint hard .... you got the thinking already , thats why may seem so.

jpphilips:

you guys are still saying the same thing, even if she made a first class, ambitious and eager to work but no emplyment, what do you advise? the few that invite her for interview want to sleep with her before anything, what do you suggest?
yet she has a suitor who wants to settle down with her, are you saying she should turn down the proposal because she doesnt have a job? not to be termed a liability?
the OP is just too young to see the big picture, for her to even think that one fifth of the girls in her hostel will smell a wealthy man, how many are they in Naija? a divorcee or second wife perhaps!!

No, you don't turn down a suitor and if we are being totally honest, there are women out there who have actually made a path for themselves and are excelling, so let's not make it look like there's no hope whatsoever.

Even if an ambitious woman doesn't get a job at a company or wherever, whatever happened to being your own boss or even seeking an alternative?Emphasis is on those women who wouldn't bother at all.

50calibre:
Hahahahahahaha I see you've detonated the first nuke, I can see the radioactive fallout looool you already know what my opinions are.

I was ferociously attacked once when I said Nigerian women serve no purpose apart from breeding. It's refreshing to this thread coming from a Nigerian female, and it's the same Safarigirl of the previous thread, apparently I judged her too hastily. We might disagree on certain issues, but she's shown her ability to reason higher than your average naija chic.

I got leech killer bruv, a woman who can't bring something significant to the table isn't worth my time, & just like Kanye west said, I'm kicking bit*hes out like pam!!! Nigga

Lmao...I just dropped a little neutron bomb in there - you've the button to the nukes.

That's why I honestly don't take women seriously when they play the blame game. You can't expect someone who sees you as a mere appendage to respect, especially when you have absolutely nothing to offer - and he's your claim to fame. To deserve respect, you've to earn it, and that comes with the territory and what you bring to the table. Hence I always remind most women that I know that it's a woman's world, but most women are too emotional and illogical, to understand the game. The society puts a lot of responsibilities on men - but if women can think like men, be driven and start aiming higher, that will tilt the balance of power. And men would have no choice but to respect you. However, when you sit your fat ars.es there - fighting men and demanding respect when you are non-achievers - then that's problematic. Nobody respects a pest and a mere appendage.

Safarigirl is like one in a million. And I think that's because she reads a lot, tries to understand what she reads and applies it to real life situations, and she's tom-boyish (she thinks like a guy). Definitely a different breed from the norm.

Bruv, I just vet them - and with my cognitive skills, I see through people easily. And once I see you have nothing to offer, apart from making noise everywhere, ya ti.ts, batty, and pum - I just throw the heffa in a garbage can. No time for time wasters. Too hot to be around cold mofos.

50calibre:



Hahahahahahaha I see you've detonated the first nuke, I can see the radioactive fallout looool you already know what my opinions are.

I was ferociously attacked once when I said Nigerian women serve no purpose apart from breeding. It's refreshing to this thread coming from a Nigerian female, and it's the same Safarigirl of the previous thread, apparently I judged her too hastily. We might disagree on certain issues, but she's shown her ability to reason higher than your average naija chic.


I got leech killer bruv, a woman who can't bring something significant to the table isn't worth my time, & just like Kanye west said, I'm kicking bit*hes out like pam!!! Nigga

You called it 'breeding' . WOMEN(proud of motherhood) are many in Nigeria,you value them not.It is when you go to USA and Australia, where they eat and drink feminism, that is when you begin to value them. Our ability to manage the RAW women we have, and make them who we want is what makes us a man.SWALLOW YOUR WORDS.

xp17: oboy, see as you serious for the matter.

my question is "do women really need too much" ?
a woman would have heaven and earth, but still wait for the man to pay all the bills, even if the man is making close to nothing.

there's this very ambitious couple I know. the man pays all bills, he extends to the friends and family of the lady, but when the man lost his job, the woman picked up the responsibility as the bread winner. but each time there is little altercation, the man would go on hunger strike, because the woman would exclude his stomach from the food of that day.

women are very aggressive and get intoxicated when handling too much power or money. I'd rather a woman balances her work with her family responsibility.

-celidion gave up her musical career for her sick husband and kids.

snoop dog's wife is a full time house wife, irrespective of his notorious nature for drug, but there is still a full time wife to manage him. there was a time his wife spoke about her husband, she said "at home my husband is the best and anything he does outside, I don't care".

most over ambitious women are abysmal in marriages. forget omotola this, omotola that. you guys really think her husband is okay not seeing his wife for weeks, certainly not. they might be struggling inside, but portrait what you wanna see, same goes to all other over ambitious women.

there is this lady I know, everytime I always see her hiking with her dog around the community park, one day I asked her about her kids and she said she has none , that she and her husband were too busy and couldn't afford the time to raise One. what a dumb excuse!. modesty is always the way my dear.

talking your wife to pay more attention on the family, has nothing to do with insecurity, it's just a way to balance the situation. setting a flexible schedule to fit into the family should not be too demanding from the husband to his beloved wife

here are some questions:
1- how many men know how to bathe little kids?
2- how many men can cook very well?
3- how many men can stand the kids when they are misbehaving?
4- how many men can handle sensitive issues?
5- how many men can go to the market to shop?
6- how many men can clean the house (except their cars)
7- how many men can wash their kids clothes?
8- how many men have time to suggest what ll work better in the family?
9- how many men really have enough time to stay indoor ?
10- how many men can do from 1-9?


women really need to be closer to their home , because, leaving men with the list above, is like pushing your marriage to a disaster. men have a lot come short, you ladies better keep to that and stop trying to change the uncertainty.

honestly i don't know why you are directing this to me when i liked your first post sef
If u read my first post you would realize that i am still in support of those ladies who do little to improve society, but do a whole lot to make sure their families are taken care of. As you can see many men on this thread are bashing women who would rather stay at home, give birth and stay in the kitchen, as if their mothers didn't do the exact same things in their marriages. If they think childbearing and rearing is insignificant, how about they grow vaginas, and give birth themselves then come back and tell us how insignificant of a role it is.

With regards to the post you quoted. He said that some ladies will end up living miserable lives because they didn't get married to rich guys, so what I'm now trying to understand is if he would be the same guy who will end up with these so called "ladies living miserable lives"

Those women to organize feminist organizations.

The OP is so right but also wrong on some aspects. Most Nigerian women do not have ambition, but not all. I know of a few who do have ambition ans many more who don't.

Rollback to my final year in Uni in Nigeria, one of my friends was asking me what I wanted to do when I graduate and I told her "Get a master's degree and hopefully a PhD". She was adamant and kinda annoying that day. She told me "Won't your parents ask you to bring your husband? Won't you get married? Won't you look for a husband? " I calmly told her, my parents encourage us to pursue out ambitions, so no, they won't ask me to be bringing husband of I'm not ready to. What baffled me was that we both studied Physics, a hard sciences major and I knew how hard I struggled to pass my classes and graduate, so why will I throw all the sweat and toil under the bed all on the name of looking for a suitor?

One girl always refers to me as "Prof" whenever she chats me up on Facebook simply because I'm getting an ordinary masters degree. She told me she doesn't understand why I would go back for two more years of graduate school when I could be bearing children in my husband's house

Fast forward, five years now, I'm almost done with my masters degree and hopefully will enroll for a PhD (Undecided) and my college girlfriend? Well, she has a baby and is a full time housewife. I look at her and shake my head, cos it was just a waste of five years in college. I had some friends back then whose sole purpose of coming to the Uni was to get any degree just so they can also refer to themselves as graduates. Smh.

So OP, yeah, some girls/women have no ambition but I and some of my friends do. Most of my girlfriends here are not doing masters but PhD and the ones that are not in school, work really good jobs while also having families. They had a goal and went for it. They pursued their dreams. I am pursuing mine. And yeah, I have a supporting dude.

There needs to b feminist movement in naija

Mondisweets:
honestly i don't know why you are directing this to me when i liked your first post sef
If u read my first post you would realize that i am still in support of those ladies who do little to improve society, but do a whole lot to make sure their families are taken care of. As you can see many men on this thread are bashing women who would rather stay at home, give birth and stay in the kitchen, as if their mothers didn't do the exact same things in their marriages. If they think childbearing and rearing is insignificant, how about they grow vaginas, and give birth themselves then come back and tell us how insignificant of a role it is.

With regards to the post you quoted. He said that some ladies will end up living miserable lives because they didn't get married to rich guys, so what I'm now trying to understand is if he would be the same guy who will end up with these so called "ladies living miserable lives"

I yam ferryy sorry.

Oooooh.
The men n women need to change mentality...
Quick!

freecocoa: No, you don't turn down a suitor and if we are being totally honest, there are women out there who have actually made a path for themselves and are excelling, so let's not make it look like there's no hope whatsoever.

Even if an ambitious woman doesn't get a job at a company or wherever, whatever happened to being your own boss or even seeking an alternative?Emphasis is on those women who wouldn't bother at all.

Thank you jare ... this dude has really had it hard.... emphasis is , what are you offering .is it all companies they harrass ladies .... its the thinking really where a lady sees herself as the less privleged being.

Reading this the only fear I have is people derailing the topic to the level where the actions of these girls become acceptable

shymexx:

Lmao...I just dropped a little neutron bomb in there - you've the button to the nukes.

That's why I honestly don't take women seriously when they play the blame game. You can't expect someone who sees you as a mere appendage to respect, especially when you have absolutely nothing to offer - and he's your claim to fame. To deserve respect, you've to earn it, and that comes with the territory and what you bring to the table. Hence I always remind most women that I know that it's a woman's world, but most women are too emotional and illogical, to understand the game. The society puts a lot of responsibilities on men - but if women can think like men, be driven and start aiming higher, that will tilt the balance of power. And men would have no choice but to respect you. However, when you sit your fat ars.es there - fighting men and demanding respect when you are non-achievers - then that's problematic. Nobody respects a pest and a mere appendage.

Safarigirl is like one in a million. And I think that's because she reads a lot, tries to understand what she reads and applies it to real life situations, and she's tom-boyish (she thinks like a guy). Definitely a different breed from the norm.

Bruv, I just vet them - and with my cognitive skills, I see through people easily. And once I see you have nothing to offer, apart from making noise everywhere, ya ti.ts, batty, and pum - I just throw the heffa in a garbage can. No time for time wasters. Too hot to be around cold mofos.

What exactly is ur point?You are just talking tongue in cheek, writing babble.Yes women should assist and stop being over dependant, making sure it doesn't affect their motherhood.Every other point is no point.Going further to call it a woman's world, shows how off point you are.Woman wrapper,forming as if he is a man.The stupidest of women will throw you into garbage can.

jennylove7575: abi o..this life is kinda complicated o...

Women need to demand more out themselves n their men.

majekdom2: Thank you jare ... this dude has really had it hard.... emphasis is , what are you offering .is it all companies they harrass ladies .... its the thinking really where a lady sees herself as the less privleged being.

Thats just it.

How can u exist in a world n not kno how it works.. .women need to b educated!!!!

Emmalot121: What exactly is ur point?You are just talking tongue in cheek, writing babble.Yes women should assist and stop being over dependant, making sure it doesn't affect their motherhood.Every other point is no point.Going further to call it a woman's world, shows how off point you are.Woman wrapper,forming as if he is a man.The stupidest of women will throw you into garbage can.

Lmao...you're obviously a troll. I know naija women wear a trad called, "wrapper" - but "woman wrapper" is definitely a new one. So, you mean I wrap myself around women, no? Well, I'm not gay - I do this thing whenever I need to. You mad, bro?

It's a woman's world - and women make life. Men came from women, and women make all the rules...they just need to understand how powerful they're.

fightforchange1: There needs to b feminist movement in naija

hehehe u posted this on NL. Wait till they e-murder you

Onegai: Try telling this to even men of nowadays.

I got a job last year (very prestigious if not big on salary, could make my career) that took me out of Lagos for less than 2 months. My bf started avoiding my calls and broke up with me on the phone after, saying "oh I can't give you what you want, you were gone, I felt neglected, blah blah". I hissed (okay I pretended to be upset to make him feel guilty ) and moved on.

Next guy who came toasting, I was working long hours on and off in Lagos, maybe 2-3 days a week, other days I'd be home. He started complainig about "so is this how it will be after marriage??" We were not even dating sef.

Current bobo, I'm slowly training him to leave me over weekends to give me space, he's not too happy.

Everyone asks women "when are you getting married?" One relative declared to me (when I told her about something I had achieved) "the crown on a woman's head is Marriage".

When Society and Nigerian men expect you as a woman to be constantly available at their beck-and-call, you're not going to be motivated to achieve much.

You cannot have it all. Every hour you spend worrying about your business is an hour away from your loved ones, every hour you spend with your loved ones is an hour away from making money. What you can do is achieve a balance, maybe 60-40 in whatever way you choose.

Most realistic response so far!!! Makes better sense it's from a lady's point of view!!!

@op nice post!!! But I think Nigerian women r gradually changing, look around you, essp. The active workforce, u can see that the number of women who work is rapidly competing with their male counterparts, business world not excluded. I work with a government organization, and you need to see my boss, she is at her late 50(s) am yet to see a man who works as hard as that woman! Yet still a wife and forever a mum!!!

fightforchange1: Not a great society to live in...smart women will organize and raise their daughter to b independent minded!

After independence, what next You talk as if we are in an even world, where everything goes as you plan.

Emmalot121: After independence, what next You talk as if we are in an even world, where everything goes as you plan.

I do not exist on the same world u live in!!!

Mondisweets: hehehe u posted this on NL. Wait till they e-murder you

Huh??
R u serious?
Lmao.

MsNas: The OP is so right but also wrong on some aspects. Most Nigerian women do not have ambition, but not all. I know of a few who do have ambition ans many more who don't.

Rollback to my final year in Uni in Nigeria, one of my friends was asking me what I wanted to do when I graduate and I told her "Get a master's degree and hopefully a PhD". She was adamant and kinda annoying that day. She told me "Won't your parents ask you to bring your husband? Won't you get married? Won't you look for a husband? " I calmly told her, my parents encourage us to pursue out ambitions, so no, they won't ask me to be bringing husband of I'm not ready to. What baffled me was that we both studied Physics, a hard sciences major and I knew how hard I struggled to pass my classes and graduate, so why will I throw all those sweat and toilet under the bed all on the name of looking for a suitor?

One girl always refers to me as "Prof" whenever she chats me up on Facebook simply because I'm getting an ordinary masters degree. She told me she doesn't understand why I would go back for two more years of graduate school when I could be bearing children in my husband's house

Fast forward, five years now, I'm almost done with my masters degree and hopefully will enroll for a PhD (Undecided) and she has a baby and is a full time housewife. I look at her and shake my head, cos it was just a waste of five years in college. I had some friends back then whose sole purpose of coming to the Uni was to get any degree just so they can also refer to themselves as graduates. Smh.

So OP, yeah, some girls/women have no ambition but I and some of my friends do. Most of my girlfriends here are not doing masters but PhD and the ones that are not in school, work really good jobs while also having families. They had a goal and went for it. They pursued their dreams. I am pursuing mine. And yeah, I have a supporting dude.

sweethat have fallen in love with u already

Those organizations will ensure that women recieve equal employment benefits.

Safarigirl or @op what's is wrong with being a housewife A lot of men loves their women that way . For your info a lot of women in Yankee are happy housewives. Wait till you start having babies and u will know how difficult it is already being a wife n mother .

Fightforchange I see u, u are a darling......