Negro_Ntns:

Much respect to the poster. . .but this conclusion is ambigous. Responsibility is a value but on this one issue, what dimension or measure of that value is adequate would be subjective. Can someone please help nail down what a "Responsible Bachelor" should look, smell, taste and sound like?

A man of his word. He doesn't say what he cannot do. He doesn't boast by what he doesn't have.
Someone who will never take pride in being a "player" aka male prostitute or derives pleasure in being the socalled puerile description---> "bad boy".
Neither should the friends he keeps be the kind that pats him on the back because he's leading a string of girlfriends along.
He's focused (knows what he wants out of life and not easily swayed by the latest fads just to feel "among" and literate not only in terms of education but of the mind and soul which translates into him having a good heart.
And most important he's family oriented.

That's a responsible man to me.

well responsible chics are even harder to come by.

So who's a responsible chic to you?

^^
A woman of her word. sHe doesn't say what she cannot do. sHe doesn't boast by what she doesn't have.
Someone who will never take pride in being a "player" aka female prostitute or derives pleasure in being the socalled puerile description---> "bad girl".
Neither should the friends she keeps be the kind that pats her on the back because she's leading a string of boifriends along.
sHe's focused (knows what she wants out of life and not easily swayed by the latest fads just to feel "among" and literate not only in terms of education but of the mind and soul which translates into her having a good heart.
And most important she's family oriented.

That's a responsible woman to me.

Shola2009:

^^
A woman of her word. sHe doesn't say what she cannot do. sHe doesn't boast by what she doesn't have.
Someone who will never take pride in being a "player" aka female prostitute or derives pleasure in being the socalled puerile description---> "bad girl".
Neither should the friends she keeps be the kind that pats her on the back because she's leading a string of boifriends along.
sHe's focused (knows what she wants out of life and not easily swayed by the latest fads just to feel "among" and literate not only in terms of education but of the mind and soul which translates into her having a good heart.
And most important she's family oriented.

That's a responsible woman to me.

ROFLMAO

davidylan:

well responsible chics are even harder to come by.

Omo You hit the nail on the head.

See this copycat o. Roflmao!

Finding a good man these days is like a needle in a haystack! Some of us have given up on the whole thing. It is such a shame at the amount of men that are willing to run around and play little games. Also, at the women who enable them do so. I don comot my hand for the whole thing.

^^^^ Same applies to women

chika98:

Finding a good man these days is like a needle in a haystack! Some of us have given up on the whole thing. It is such a shame at the amount of men that are willing to run around and play little games. Also, at the women who enable them do so. I don comot my hand for the whole thing.

Can you try to be specific? Good man or Good Nigerian Man?

chic2pimp:

^^^^ Same applies to women

They won't accept or believe that or did you see anyone of them here throwing the blame at themselves? No they just like to play the victim part and forgeting that you have to remove the bug in your eyes first before you can clearly blame the men otherwise they are just missing the main point.

Me thinks the OP is spot on. But let me say what he forgot to add: Most so called responsible girls here have a major attitude that just drives them down the pecking order when a naija guy is choosing whom to date. Very few naija guys will tolerate from a naija woman, the kind of life that white women subject their men to.
Its the same reason why naija guys in the UK flood naija when its time to pick a bride, its that naijaness in us that just wont stoop that low. As a bachelor, i do my own stuff, heck! I may spend the whole day in the kitchen cooking just a pot of stew and a pot of soup, but i still cook my own food - and only cos i have to do that to survive. . . It would be a totally different story if i was married today - my affair with the kitchen would all but be over.
Unfortunately, our girls change when they come over here, they forget how they woke up every morning in naija to sweep the house and clean. . . and although you'll probably have to use a hoover and washing machine to do that here, the laziness just takes over.

I was embarrassed for a naija man on the train the other day, he was screaming at the top of his voice on the phone, asking his wife to get off her lazy butt and make some food for herself. The nature of his job means he is not always at home, but his wife refuses to eat the eba or rice she used to eat at home if it is not nandos rice or kfc chicken. . . The man was speaking in yoruba so loudly that people were angry, only to start apologising for his outburst and narrating to the people around him that his wife is giving him hell when she was sorrounded by uncooked food. . . I wondered what sort of impression that would give.

I can see the Naija bachelors in jand defending themselves with all they've got!! LOL!

What does the poster mean by "Responsible men in UK"? As if the problem is only peculiar to UK. Whitelexi has actually stolen my thunder in that the problem lies in how naija women are soon transformed the moment they enter jand, besides the fact that some (and that is just being nice) have very little home training, cant cook, dont have a clue about domestics have no identity whatsoever, its kinda hard for ppl like me to settle down with such a person hence most guys tend to resort to naija for wifey material.
While, i agree some naija guys in UK are nothing short of "useless", the same can be said of guys back home, so one just have to "open eye" well well to find the good ones. Ultimately, most of these girls get what they deserve,

debest1:

What does the poster mean by "Responsible men in UK"? As if the problem is only peculiar to UK. Whitelexi has actually stolen my thunder in that the problem lies in how naija women are soon transformed the moment they enter jand, besides the fact that some (and that is just being nice) have very little home training, cant cook, dont have a clue about domestics have no identity whatsoever, its kinda hard for ppl like me to settle down with such a person hence most guys tend to resort to naija for wifey material.
While, i agree some naija guys in UK are nothing short of "useless", the same can be said of guys back home, so one just have to "open eye" well well to find the good ones. Ultimately, most of these girls get what they deserve,

*rooooolz eyez*

debest1:

What does the poster mean by "Responsible men in UK"? As if the problem is only peculiar to UK. Whitelexi has actually stolen my thunder in that the problem lies in how naija women are soon transformed the moment they enter jand, besides the fact that some (and that is just being nice) have very little home training, cant cook, dont have a clue about domestics have no identity whatsoever, its kinda hard for ppl like me to settle down with such a person hence most guys tend to resort to naija for wifey material.
While, i agree some naija guys in UK are nothing short of "useless", the same can be said of guys back home, so one just have to "open eye" well well to find the good ones. Ultimately, most of these girls get what they deserve

They are worse back home

tboy1:

They are worse back home

not in my village, they are very docile,

Ujujoan:

I can see the Naija bachelors in jand defending themselves with all they've got!! LOL!

Did u expect us to lie on our backs and ignore stuff like this when it directly concerns us? No? Good.

debest1:

not in my village, they are very docile,  

What the name of your village(with directions abeg) I have a couple of female friends looking for husbands including one who recently got divorced after 8 months of marriage

tboy1:

What the name of your village(with directions abeg) I have a couple of female friends looking for husbands including one who recently got divorced after 8 months of marriage

cant tell u until ive married my full quota of 4 wives, then u guys can have your turn,

davidylan:

well responsible chics are even harder to come by.

true

Me thinks the OP is spot on. But let me say what he forgot to add: Most so called responsible girls here have a major attitude that just drives them down the pecking order when a naija guy is choosing whom to date. Very few naija guys will tolerate from a naija woman, the kind of life that white women subject their men to.
Its the same reason why naija guys in the UK flood naija when its time to pick a bride, its that naijaness in us that just wont stoop that low. As a bachelor, i do my own stuff, heck! I may spend the whole day in the kitchen cooking just a pot of stew and a pot of soup, but i still cook my own food - and only cos i have to do that to survive. . . It would be a totally different story if i was married today - my affair with the kitchen would all but be over.
Unfortunately, our girls change when they come over here, they forget how they woke up every morning in naija to sweep the house and clean. . . and although you'll probably have to use a hoover and washing machine to do that here, the laziness just takes over.

I was embarrassed for a naija man on the train the other day, he was screaming at the top of his voice on the phone, asking his wife to get off her lazy butt and make some food for herself. The nature of his job means he is not always at home, but his wife refuses to eat the eba or rice she used to eat at home if it is not nandos rice or kfc chicken. . . The man was speaking in yoruba so loudly that people were angry, only to start apologising for his outburst and narrating to the people around him that his wife is giving him hell when she was sorrounded by uncooked food. . . I wondered what sort of impression that would give.

Very correct and a further dimension to the issue at hand!

newdeal:

Very correct and a further dimension to the issue at hand!

The truth is the serious minded girls here work and live that corporate life that many dream of. . .  They drive and can afford literally anything they really want [Although they'll prefer u to buy it for them]
But with this self sufficiency, comes a pattern of self delusion and gross neglect when they get into a relationship. I dunno whether it feels like they're talking to their subordinates in the office when they talk to their boyfriends. . .  There is no respect, and any conversation turns into a challenge - always reeking of that "I cant be bothered" tone and attitude.

I wont be surprised if most naija guys in jand end up eating out with their girlfriends each time they visit the girls. Personally, we can decide to meet outside on a date and eat out, but when you come to my house, u go chop my cooking just so u know that i can cook and it wont be a big deal in future if we end up together   It truly is a sad situation and is often under-estimated.

Men are same thing. but there are still responsible once and they are easy to know if the lasy is very sensitive and if she is not in haste.

visit www.perfectsdate..com for real tips on dating

goodness85:

Men are same thing. but there are still responsible once and they are easy to know if the lasy is very sensitive and if she is not in haste.

visit www.perfectsdate..com for real tips on dating

I find the highlighted words very needlessly reckless and brutally thoughtless

whitelexi:

[b]The truth is the serious minded girls here work and live that corporate life that many dream of. . .  They drive and can afford literally anything they really want[b] [Although they'll prefer u to buy it for them]
But with this self sufficiency, comes a pattern of self delusion and gross neglect when they get into a relationship. I dunno whether it feels like they're talking to their subordinates in the office when they talk to their boyfriends. . .  There is no respect, and any conversation turns into a challenge - always reeking of that "I cant be bothered" tone and attitude.

I wont be surprised if most naija guys in jand end up eating out with their girlfriends each time they visit the girls. Personally, we can decide to meet outside on a date and eat out, but when you come to my house, u go chop my cooking just so u know that i can cook and it wont be a big deal in future if we end up together  It truly is a sad situation and is often under-estimated.

Are you seriously suggesting that it's only in jand you find such girls    

whitelexi:

I find the highlighted words very needlessly reckless and brutally thoughtless

Taking this a lil bit personal . .  aint u hon?

Ujujoan:

Taking this a lil bit personal . . aint u hon?

How can she say all men are same thing?

All men are equal, but some are still more equal than the others. . . Period!

That aside, now that you're here, abeg give me some TLC

^^^^

whitelexi:

How can she say all men are same thing?

All men are equal, but some are still more equal than the others. . . Period!

That aside, now that you're here, abeg give me some TLC

gbam, nice move my guy, at least show her sey jand guys no be all mouth

debest1:

gbam, nice move my guy, at least show her sey jand guys no be all mouth

*roooooooolz eyez*

Ujujoan:

^^^^

Geee, thanks boo

Dont worry, i don kool down.

But i was never under pressure. . .

See, 'em Vs me, is like cats Vs a pitbull

whitelexi:

Geee, thanks boo

Dont worry, i don kool down.

But i was never under pressure. . .

See, 'em Vs me, is like cats Vs a pitbull

LOL

Good to know!

Well in my opinion I think there a lot of women in the uk very beautiful ones as well, hence men are very picky and might not be too keen on nigerian girls educated or not,