₦airaland Forum

Welcome, Guest: RegisterLoginWith GoogleTrendingRecentNew

Stats: 3,331,404 members, 8,450,176 topics. Date: Wednesday, 22 July 2026 at 09:52 PM

Toggle theme

5minsmadness's Posts

Nairaland Forum5minsmadness's Profile5minsmadness's Posts

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 (of 187 pages)

RomanceRe: Why Don't U Use Deodorant??? by 5minsmadness(op): 5:42pm On Jun 12, 2016
SAINTSAMURAII:
Five minutes madness indeed. people like OP is why sango kill people with thunder.
What is ya own? Abi u smell as well? What is madness about telling people to be considerate of thier neighbour's noses? angry
RomanceRe: Why Don't U Use Deodorant??? by 5minsmadness(op): 5:40pm On Jun 12, 2016
PrincessAnna:
speak for yourself, not everyone smells like dead rat
Oh, so you don't use deodorant as well? Chai angry
RomanceWhy Don't U Use Deodorant??? by 5minsmadness(op): 5:31pm On Jun 12, 2016
And yes you, I mean you browsing nairaland right now! Why don't u use deodorant?

Smelling like something that was left out to die the night before, haba!
I have been enduring your revolting stench from asaba down to Abuja, and I have to say in case no one ever told you, you stink!!!

And you're sitting there wearing your red shirt and browsing nairaland with the look on your face like someone that is pleasuring himself. Uuuugh!

Guy you are browsing the romance section right now and I thot I'd say it like this to get your attention. The driver offed the Air conditioner in the car cos of you in case you dont know. We can't breathe! Deodorant is N150 in the market for goodness sake.

If u know u have body odour go and get it treated or better still, mask it with purple rose, na n200 dem dey sell am!
FamilyRe: Statutory Rape. Who Should Be Charged To Court? by 5minsmadness(op): 2:20pm On Jun 11, 2016
Why is everyone blaming the parents huh Wouldn't u react the same way if it was your child?
FamilyRe: Statutory Rape. Who Should Be Charged To Court? by 5minsmadness(op): 2:19pm On Jun 11, 2016
VictorRomanov:
You see Nigerian parents! Nigerian parents need courses on parenting. Seriously! Instead of getting to the root of the problem - why under age children would be having sex, they are throwing blames like through passes. The result: the children will learn to do it without being caught; maybe go to a friends place or rent a room at a cheap hotel. From there they will go places while forming good children at home.

They have money to throw away in court. The lawyers will laugh at this!

Nigerian parents end up making their children professional hypocrites.
How will getting to the root of the problem help? They are kids and they are having sex! They should be stopped and severely punished. C'est finis.
FamilyRe: Statutory Rape. Who Should Be Charged To Court? by 5minsmadness(op): 2:17pm On Jun 11, 2016
Amplitron:
Statutory rape is the case only if one of them is at least 18. In the case they are both minors.
So it's perfectly legal what they have done by sleeping with each other?
FamilyRe: His Wife Want Him To Stop Working On Sunday by 5minsmadness: 2:15pm On Jun 11, 2016
silvoice:
With the current economic hardship, he goes to work on sundays, after church. But his wife wants him to stop working on sunday, because she feels lonely at home and thinks that it's not right as a christian. But he had to take care of the accumulating bills, especially now that she's pregnant. Pls is he being insensitive to her feeling or is she just being foolish as she's not working herself.
She's being a woman, that's all.
She misses his company and her emotions are going haywire now that she's pregnant.
He should reassure her and spend some extra time with her whenever he has the chance, but he doesn't have to stop working on Sunday.
FamilyRe: What To Do If You Are Married To A Phlegmatic Husband Or Wife. by 5minsmadness: 2:11pm On Jun 11, 2016
Op when will you write on melancholics
FamilyRe: Why Dont Nigerian Parent Apologize To Their Children? by 5minsmadness: 2:09pm On Jun 11, 2016
I think it has to do with them being an authority figure.
I can only remember my father apologising once in his life, and am still not sure if it was in my dream.
FamilyRe: A Topic For The Ladies? by 5minsmadness: 2:08pm On Jun 11, 2016
ayogabriel:
Hello All,

So couple of time, friends have come to visit me, and after eating, the guys just go to kitchen and drop the plates, I don't even care if they wash it or not, I do it my self and sometimes I tease them to doing there dishes. So coming to girls, they come over, and after eating they drop there plates( unwashed) some gfs just end up clearing the kitchen and some just drop the plate, few that slept over wakes up in the morning without the thought of clearing the kitchen.

Do you think it's cool to approach the said ladies at least the courtesy of the guy cooking and they dropping the plates for him to clear up because the apartment belongs to him. Or I should just quietly, do my thing, and next time I pay them back, by the decree of cook and wash your food and plate. (lol)

Back to been serious, do you guys think it's expected of ladies to always clear up the kitchen at the host place, which of course depends on the relationship between the guy and the lady or there isn't a big deal about it. It's just dirty dishes right? But we all see it as one of the tedious of kitchen duties.
One of the qualities of a good well brought up girl is that she is domestic i.e she knows on instinct that she should cook and clean up in the kitchen, more so if she is your gf and is planning to be with you for the long haul i.e considering marriage. Unless you don't mind washing and cooking while your wife sits and waits for her meals, now is the time to start weeding the chaff from the good seed. You may think it's cool now when she's sexy and beautiful but she doesn't know how to do simple house chores but trust me all that sexiness will fade after a few years and you realise you married someone that cant take care of you homewise.

A girl is supposed to be able to take care of such things. So watch those your girlfriends well and start picking which ones will be good for just sex and the special one u will want to proudly take home to mother.
FamilyRe: Sex Fatigue by 5minsmadness: 2:31pm On Jun 10, 2016
ifisco:
its better to abstain and keep all the fun for your spouse
Thanks ma, but we are talking bout married couples here.
FamilyRe: Sex Fatigue by 5minsmadness: 2:14pm On Jun 10, 2016
Obaino84:
Please, throw more light
First things first.
Has the man forgiven her for her past? Is the man holding anything in his mind against her?
FamilyRe: Sex Fatigue by 5minsmadness: 1:57pm On Jun 10, 2016
Obaino84:
Good day , my fellow Nairalanders.
Please what could be the cause of loss
of interest in sex coming from the man in less than a year of marriage despite the interest shown by his wife. This man in question is very healthy, loves his wife and is not cheating on her with any other woman. They are financially comfortable and also expecting their 1st child.
Please, I need useful suggestions.
Thanks in anticipation
Stress
Anxiety
Poor sleep
Unresolved quarrels
Adjusting to new environment
Overenthusiasm in early sex life.
Fear of the pregnant form of the wife
Illness - malaria, typhoid fever, diabetes, etc.
FamilyRe: Sex Fatigue by 5minsmadness: 1:55pm On Jun 10, 2016
.
Modified**pls whoever liked this post should like the one under as av deleted this one. angry
Thanks kiss
EducationRe: Convert These Questions To Pidgin English And Receive A Reward..part 2. by 5minsmadness(op): 11:02am On Jun 10, 2016
hahn:
You got mail bro

The 2h own no enter wink
shocked
FamilyStatutory Rape. Who Should Be Charged To Court? by 5minsmadness(op):
A very interesting case was brought to my desk a few weeks ago and I thought it would be interesting to hear your views on it. Here goes.

A couple brought thier daughter to hospital for us to examine if she was still a virgin. I honestly don't know what exactly people want us to do when they make such a request. Should we stick our fingers in and break the hymen to prove she's a virgin or what huh Anyway they reported that their 15 yrs old daughter had been caught in bed doing amazing acrobatics with the next door neighbor. As expected her parents were freaking out with the mother weeping and the father calling the army, the navy, the President etc. When further questioned under a calmer environment the girl admitted this wasn't the first time, that she and the guy had been having sex for the past three months. She said she loved the boy and didn't want any wahala and her parents were "embarrassing her"(yayyy for westernization)

After a while there was some commotion outside and then the parents of the boy came in. The situation exploded with both parents shouting in each other. It was during the calming down process I saw the culprit.

A 16yr old boy. Looking extremely guilty grin

The issue now is that the boy's parents are accusing the girl of seducing the boy. Always coming to the house at odd hours, trying to catch the boy alone when they are not at home. The boys parents were the first to mention statutory rape, that thier son was underage and vulnerable while the other neighbours' daughter "don tear eye finish".

The parents of the girl were outraged of course and threatened fire and brimstone. The parents of the boy are not holding back either. Both kids have agreed the sex was consensual.

So who do we blame for this palaver?
FamilyRe: Adorable Moment Groom Breaks Down In Tears As Bride Arrives by 5minsmadness: 8:14am On Jun 10, 2016
No going back now cry
FamilyRe: Shocking! Man Posted Bedroom Video Of His Nigeria Pregnant Mistress To His Wife by 5minsmadness: 2:31pm On Jun 09, 2016
The wife must have really done some serious shit for him to behave like this.

The man has no honour.

The pregnant woman is brazenly shameless to allow this to be done to her fellow woman.
FamilyRe: Hit Or Miss: Checkout The Cake She Made For Someone's Daugther's Birthday.'s by 5minsmadness: 9:07am On Jun 09, 2016
Practice makes perfect.
She'll get there.
FamilyRe: Your Advices Are Highly Valued by 5minsmadness:
Whyterose:
I av been married 4 2years now, but My hubby is addicted to chatting with random girl's on any social network.This I noticed jst a month in2 our marriage.I av cried n begged dat he stops by seems l'm pouring water on a rock. He goes as far as hooking up with some. I got 2find out wen he spends hours in d bathroom chatting .These girls also send me abusive facebook msgs at times. The most recent of all is dat a friend of mine visited last week n l used her fone to call my hubby cos l was out of airtym only 2resume work on Monday n was shown d conversation BTW her n my hubby cos it happens dat he called her n still went ahead 2search her out on whatsapp n started his shameless chats with her asking 4 her pics n dat the hook up. All along he never knew d lady in question knows him. She jst showed me d chats as l got 2d office. I was so ashamed and embarrassed,infact my day was ruined. I Leta confronted him n since den he's been acting remorseful and all dat. I Jst can't seem 2 4give him this time around cos l strongly believe he's begging now cos l got 2know abt it. Eva since Monday I haven't spoken 2him after d confrontation. pls l'm I on track? your advices is Wat I look forward 2 as l prepare 4 work. Thnx
Ok, I was kinda joking before. On a more serious note:

You married a womanizer.
It's ok though, nobody's perfect.
Some here advising you married wife-beaters, others married thieves, others married men that cant give them babies, others married men they KNOW dont love them.
Like some here have rightly told you, a womanizer will continue to cheat until something drastic happens, either he is caught in the act or acquires an illness or something (not necessarily HIV).
Your husband for once (and according to you) appears to be remorseful over this recent episode. Most likely because he was caught completely red-handed.

Milk it for all it's worth. Make it an issue he wont forget in a hurry. Don't over-do it but make sure he learns his lesson. Tell him you wont resume sexual relations until he goes for HIV test. In the meantime use a condom. Tell him its cos you want to protect yourself, not necessarily cos you are angry with him. That statement will make him think logically about his actions and make him regret that you can no longer trust him. Pls dont do this forever o, just until he gets a HIV test done.

Tell him about all the women that have sent you abusive faceboook messages. Read it out aloud to him in the dead of night, just before he is about to sleep. then leave him to ponder on those words.

At the end of all this pls forgive him. Your marriage is still young and both of you are still growing. He will need to grow out of his womanizing habits. Its sad that this happens a lot in marriage, but in time the man learns to be more responsible and faithful. Dont let it fester in your heart and bring bitterness. That wont help anybody.

All the best.
FamilyRe: Your Advices Are Highly Valued by 5minsmadness: 7:59am On Jun 08, 2016
thesicilian:
You ladies should stop the habit of going through your spouses' phones
But she needs to monitor him na
How will she catch him being unfaithful if she doesn't go through his phone as often as possible?
All women should go through thier husbands phone constantly so they can catch them being unfaithful and divorce them!
EducationRe: Convert These Questions To Pidgin English And Receive A Reward..part 2. by 5minsmadness(op): 11:41am On Jun 07, 2016
hahn:
"She"? undecided
Babe reply your email jo grin
EducationRe: Convert These Questions To Pidgin English And Receive A Reward..part 2. by 5minsmadness(op): 10:45pm On Jun 06, 2016
Lezzlie:
[b]2 of A : Talk/write how e hard you before you take get help for the hospital .

2 of B: How you see the time when the nurse waste before she take come attend to you after you don' get your card?

3 of B: How you see the time you waste before the doctor come see you when the nurse don' check you finish?

4 of B : How you see the time when the laboratory dey take attend to you?

5 of B: How you see the way the pharmacy people dey waste time to give person drug?

1 of C : How you see the behaviour of those people when dey keep your file for the hospital ?

3of C : How you see the way the doctors dem dey behave?

4 of C: How you see the way those lab people for the hospital dey behave?

5 of C: How you take see the way the drug people for the hospital dey behave?


1 of D: How you see the way the people when dey records dey answer your questions and give tell you things about the hospital?

2 of D: how you see the way the nurses dem treat you and answer your questions and tell you things about the hospital?

3 of D: How you see the way the doctors dem dey treat you and answer your questions and tell you things?

4 of D: how you see the way the lab people dey treat you and answer your question and tell you things?

5 of D: how you see the way the pharmacy people treat you and answer your questions and tell you things you suppose know?


1 of E: How you see the hospital compound, how e clean reach?

2 of E: How you take see that place when people dey wait, e clean?

3 of E: the place when people dey wait, e balance well, E dey comfortable?

4 of E: How you see the doctor office, E clean, E dey comfortable?


1 of F: How you see the way to take get hospital card?

2of F : how you see d hustle to take go see doctor ?

3 of F: How you see the way to take go get lab result?

4 of F: How you see the way dem dey take collect drugs for the pharmacy?[/b]


My pidgin na the Warri/Delta version
lol, thanks lezz! I jus see hahn own come dey run like craze person to printer. Na now i dey peruse your own o!
EducationRe: Convert These Questions To Pidgin English And Receive A Reward..part 2. by 5minsmadness(op): 10:44pm On Jun 06, 2016
hahn:
Good luck! smiley
Just got back bro! check your email.
EducationRe: Convert These Questions To Pidgin English And Receive A Reward..part 2. by 5minsmadness(op): 10:39pm On Jun 06, 2016
kenkenn:
Bros,e hard o
Lol!
AgricultureRe: Farming Explode:over 2000 Hectas Of Farm Land For Sale In OGUN State by 5minsmadness: 2:07pm On Jun 06, 2016
olayemifisayo:
quote author=AreFada2 post=42140616]

Thank you sir.

What's the cost involved in managing one acre for example: clearing, ploughing, seedlings, planting, weeding, harvesting, marketing & your commission? For plants like Watermelon, Plantain, Cassava, cucumber.

That would be used to see how much for more acres if necessary.[/quotep
I am also interested in this offer.
nkpablo@yahoo.com
Urgent reply plz. And if u have a new offer kindly let me know about it. Thanks.
EducationRe: Convert These Questions To Pidgin English And Receive A Reward..part 2. by 5minsmadness(op): 10:15am On Jun 06, 2016
hahn:
E dey easy for you to get access to the different services wey we get for the hospital?
Abeg tell us how e take easy reach. Like say from 1-5?



E dey tey before you collect your card for our Records Department? Rate am 1-5
E dey tey before the nurse they check you after you collect the card? Rate am 1-5
E dey tey before doctor see you after the nurse don check your card? Rate am 1-5
E dey tey before dem attend to you for the lab? Rate am 1-5
E dey tey before dem give you your drugs? Rate am 1-5




How you take see the way wey the medical records staff dey behave?
How you take see the behavior of the nursing staff?
How you take see the behavior of the medical doctor?
How you take see the behavior of the lab staff?
How you take see the behavior of the pharmacy staff



You dey satisfied with the way wey the records staff give you information and take attend to you when you ask am about our services for the hospital?
You dey satisfied with the way wey the doctor take attend to you, as dem take answer your questions and give you information?
You dey satisfied with the way wey the lab staff take attend to you, as dem take answer your questions and give you information?
You dey satisfied with the way wey the pharmacist take attend to you, as dem take answer your questions and give you information?



The hospital clean for your eye? How you go take rate am 1-5?
etc




Shey to collect your card give you wahala? Rate am 1-5
Shey to see doctor give you wahala? Rate am 1-5
Shey to collect your lab result give you wahala? Rate am 1-5
Shey to collect your drugs give you wahala? Rate am 1-5




Hope I am on time smiley
LIFESAVER! thanks!! Brb
EducationRe: Convert These Questions To Pidgin English And Receive A Reward..part 2. by 5minsmadness(op): 9:43am On Jun 06, 2016
Lezzlie:
Lolz, those questions actually have no direct pidgin equivalents in my opinion.


But as a Warri boy, make I try sma' grin


A. How you take see the way this hospital service dey work, how you grade am?

B. How you see the time when the hospital card people waste before them give you your hospital card ?

C How you see the way the hospital nurses them behave sef ?
Choi.
Na only 3 questions u fit help me with out of the 25?
Am in soup cry
EducationConvert These Questions To Pidgin English And Receive A Reward..part 2. by 5minsmadness(op): 8:54am On Jun 06, 2016
I'm back again o grin https://www.nairaland.com/2642141/convert-these-questions-pidgin-english#38648292
Pls I need someone to urgently convert these questions to pidgin english before 10am. A reward awaits you if you do. Thanks!

A
How do you rate your satisfaction with the level of ease at which you are able to locate the service windows of the hospital?
Indicate the level of ease with which you are able to access care at the service windows of the hospital?

B
How do you rate your satisfaction with the waiting time at the Records Department before you get your card?
How do you rate your satisfaction with the waiting time to get checked by the nurse after you have gotten your card?
How do you rate your satisfaction with the waiting time to see the doctor after being checked by the nurse?
How do you rate your satisfaction with the waiting time at the laboratory?
How do you rate your satisfaction with the waiting time to get your drugs at the pharmacy?


C
How satisfied are you at the attitude/behaviour of the medical records staff?
How do you rate your satisfaction with the attitude/behaviour of the nursing staff?
How do you rate your satisfaction with the attitude/behaviour of the medical doctor?
How do you rate your satisfaction with the attitude/behaviour of the laboratory staff?
How do you rate your satisfaction with the attitude/behaviour of the pharmacy staff?

D
What is your level of satisfaction with the way in which the records staff gave you information and responded to your questions about the hospital services?
What is your level of satisfaction with the way the nurses attended to you, gave you information and answered your questions?
What is your level of satisfaction with the way the doctor attended to you, gave you information and answered your questions?
What is your level of satisfaction with the way the laboratory staff attended to you, gave you information and answered your questions?
What is your level of satisfaction with the way the pharmacist attended to you, gave you information and answered your questions?


E
How would you rate the cleanliness of the hospital surroundings?
How would you rate the cleanliness of the waiting area?
How would you rate the comfort of the hospital waiting area?
How would you rate the cleanliness and comfort of the doctors consultation room?


F
How would you rate your satisfaction with the processes involved in getting your card?
How would you rate your satisfaction with the processes involved in seeing the doctor?
How would you rate your satisfaction with the processes involved in getting your laboratory results?
How would you rate your satisfaction with the processes involved in collecting your drugs?


Pls I need this before 10am, First person to complete the questions will receive my sincere gratitude and humble reward. Anything after is null and void, thanks!

cc hahn, lezz, Lezzlie AM in soup again, pls help!
FamilyRe: 10 Things That Are Too Real For Nigerians Who Have Ever Used A Public Toilet by 5minsmadness:
Let us know when u r thru...

Modified

grin grin grin
FamilyRe: The Pros And Cons Of A Virgin Wife by 5minsmadness: 7:10am On Jun 06, 2016
What Op has written up there is the truth.
As usual there will be one or two exceptions but that does not negate the majority.
FamilyRe: I'm Married, But... Could This Be My Soulmate? by 5minsmadness: 12:31pm On Jun 05, 2016
valentineIK:
Thank you for your opinion, am still confuse, but il try my best.

Pls, is that you in the profile picture? If is you, you are very beautiful. Can we be friends? So you can give me more advises on this issues. I would really luv 2 befriend you.
SMH.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 ... 30 31 32 33 34 35 36 37 38 (of 187 pages)