₦airaland Forum

But wait o,
Why will a girl be spending money on a guy in a relationship?
Am I that old fashioned?

Ok sequel to my first thread. And no, I'm not trolling.
I've had it up to here with girls taking advantage of a brother.
Ok she came over and started talking yada yada how she needs money for this and that and how i should help her with some lab tests and drugs. I asked about her bf cos I know he's a well-to-do guy and can easily do all this stuff she is asking for. She said she doesnt want to bother him that's why she's asking me as a friend. I said she doesn't need to come to me as her guy is more than capable to sort this out. I can help with the lab tests and no more.
She starts playing around and touching me and stuff and am like OK its on , I touch back and next thing she's taking offence that she doesn't want sex that she has a fiancee. I tell her to go to him then. She said she needs money from me. I said OK then no sex no money.

I know it was mean but I just can't stomach the nonsense anymore. Why will she be coming to me for help when her bf is there? Now she's vexing that I want her only for sex, me I don bone dey browse with my phone. She looks like she wants to cry but Na she sabi. I feel she's been taking advantage of me and I've had enough of it.


Am I still being wicked?

There was this girl I was interested in, we actually met at the hospital and she was damn hot and sexy. I asked her out and she complied and we went for a couple of dates during which things began to get more serious. However, on one of the dates she let it slip that she had a boyfriend but she wouldn't mind double-dating. Me, I don't do that stuff, I noticed it always ends up messy. So I pulled back from the relationship and when she asked why I stated my reasons. Even if I want to continue that kind of relationship I would never take her serious and it would be mainly for the sex. She thanked me for my honesty and as far as I know we parted ways in good terms.

The thing is now she keeps calling and asking for one favour or the other, financial, medical, etc. I feel such things can be handled by her boyfriend who she has even fixed a wedding date with, and so I keep telling her I can't help her, she should go meet her man but she no wan hear.

Ok Now she's asking for us to meet at my place and I'm wary about meeting her in a lonely place so I won't be tempted cos she is damn tempting and am seeing green light everywhere. I told her to keep away from me and she said am too uptight and wicked. That I don't want to help her. But I feel since she's already in a serious relationship any help she needs should come from her bf, even if I can render that help.
Am I really being wicked?

Sorry for any typos, this was typed in a hurry.

coolh3ad:
As in ehn...Not just Africa......Asia, Australia and Europe included

Lol

Lol

Lolol

sweetcocoa:
I see you Mr busy bee, I hope whatever 's taking al your time is raining cheddar o.

My sista,
You know this government of change has left many Changeless.
So we need to work hard to make more Change to survive this change . No time

.

sweetcocoa:
Somebody please help me out here, ever since I was a teenager, having all those endless fights with my brother over chores, like I never really understood why he would want to eat noodles and because I or my sisters were there, we should be the ones to cook it for him, when he had two hands and legs like us, eh! For what na? and when I refuse ,physical combat don start, with him mostly yelling things like, "don't you know you are a girl, nobody will marry you this stubborn Ogbanje girl if you continue like this"

My point is, what does doing these chores take from you men? Just how does it change you from being who you are? I really want to know because I still don't get why it's such a big deal. It's not like women don't/can't do those jobs considered 'hard' I and so many other women, washed cars growing up, turned on the gen, weeded compounds, climbed trees to pluck fruits, etc, so why do you people find it so difficult to do dishes or cook, just why?

Cc
Crackhaus, 5minsmadness, Acidosis etc.

Let me start by apologising. My response is going to be brief, brittle and brisk.

You're a woman. I'm a man. These terms have social as well as biological and even psychological definitions. I cook, clean, wash, sew my own clothes when torn as well as change the flat tire and repair the gen. There is literally nothing in the kitchen that you can do that I can't (except maybe keep it a little tidier...lol) and maybe even a little better in some (I make pounded yam so smooth you'd think you'd died and gone to heaven when u taste it with my goat meat egusi soup).


However all those feminine chores stop when I get married. I want to make sure the woman I marry can be nurturing. I want to make sure she can take care of me and more especially my kids. Her primary role is to nurture. Mine is to protect. Simples. Most of the nurturing takes place in the kitchen i.e cooking, washing plates etc. Any woman that cooks and cleans for a man has already warmed her way into his heart (hence so much infidelity with even ugly housemaids... matter for anothe day).

Now, the woman can earn money for the house yes, but that still is not her primary duty. A family in which the woman is the breadwinner is a failed /dysfunctional family. It might be a temporary in certain cases but should be corrected as soon as possible.

Back to your question: the chores mentioned up there are chores for the female folk. It doesnt mean the men can't do it but it is expected for the women to do it. You don't expect us to have a family meeting and the men will go to the market and cook food. You don't expect to be home with your brother and he'll enter kitchen to cook when u r there. That's a social dysfunction. Just like no one expects u to go and put on the generator or push the car or clear the bush at the backyard when your brother is there. The social order has defined what is appropriate for the men and women to do.

And both sexes should take pride in doing thier duties.

Even in the western world men who constantly do the dishes are said to be hen-pecked. Sure he may help once in a while but it is not by force. In fact a man cooking or doing the dishes during or after a date is so appreciated in the west it is seen as being romantic.

What you r trying to question here is the social order of things. Well, go ahead. Nothing stops you. There has been relative peace in the world for so long people have time to question even the basest of things.



On a lighter note your Bros said u no go find man marry if u continue your Agbero ways... You don find the man so?

You see? He was right

sweetcocoa:
Okay, I agree you can't force him.

I will go with b but he has to accept, there's no way he'll refuse and have peace in that house, my persuasive skills na die so I don correct the option.

End of story.


Came in late. Been busy.

Wait o, Una come dey fight again?







Can't we all just get along?

analice107:
But seriously, if there's war, will these effeminates be conscripted as soldiers or will they say " No we cant fight, we are now women?"

Hehehe
They wont have a choice.
It is then you'll see man crying and getting in touch with thier inner feelings as they r being handed a gun

Mindfulness:
So do I.

14yrs imprisonment. Just saying.

Ishilove:
I've let it go, Monsieur Postmann. When I said he should shove his forgiveness where the sun don't shine, that's my way of waving the white flag with my middle finger .

And you should know where to stick that middle finger

postmann:
My man, I understand your point perfectly. Just try and look beyond it. Remember you've forgiven. There's just one more great step ahead which I know you're capable of taking -to forget. Let's make progress as men. I saw your debate with _swtcocoa and I know you're far from being irrational.

You know as men, when we say we've forgiven, we mean it. Let's show them we mean and do what we say.

Lol
Just responding to her diatribe is all. She thinks I'm one of those teenage romancelanders she frolics with.

Was watching Voltron, Superted and Thundersub while she was still having her diapers changed

Ok av left it alone. Just catching some innocent fun.

Guy u no dey sleep? Or are u balancing books like me?

MrsNimat:
Gud afternoon mamas it is dis ur ftm again pls I need quick response and God bless yu,here is the issueWhen I went fr six weeks immunisation my baby was weighing her birth weight 3.2 and then she was tkin aptamil fomula nd breast milk, nd she poos 3-4 times daily so I changed her milk to enfamil nd she was nw pooin once daily that ia like 10 days agao but since five days I noticed she has been pooin a dark gren poo so.much nd watery,so I decided to taste the enfamil nd discovered it was a bit bitter unlike the aptamil,pls help me with suggeations please am confused

Why are you not breastfeeding your baby? You would have avoided all this wahala if u did exclusive breastfeeding.
Greenish watery stool is a sign of infection maybe even an enteritis. For goodness sake take that kid to hospital before it gets worse.

If you don't have HIV pls for the love of Mike, breastfeed that child exclusively.

gonkraziiiiii:
OK so I have ma room n hubby has his but we sleep together everynight in his room...ma room is for ma clothes cos its plenty oooo ....dey r things to be discussed by 3am,moves to be made by 4am...d sweetest is d bed is not so big so if we quarrel body must touch each other o n Before u say jack,d quarrel is over but when u quarrel n u sleep in ur room,negative tots,pride n prolonged quarrel starts....my opinion ooo

Hmmmm. Nice.

I'm back.
Postmann ignore that elderly Primip.
This is her knee-jerk response to the scores of people who have called her out for wrongful banning so much so that she had to resign/was fired from her job (for bigger things )

This might be an anonymous online forum but I believe it also mirrors to an extent the kind of person you are or you will turn out to be if given the power to act without consequences.

It's easy to read thru and compare our posts and see who's the barbarian-ess.

If one person tells you something's on your face u have the liberty of ignoring the person. But if more than two people tell u the same thing then common sense behooves you to take a look in the mirror to see if they are really telling the truth.

She was powerdrunk. She bit off more than she could chew. She got fired/quit.

She's the one who should learn her lesson and move on.

postmann:

My man, pls forgive.

[s] I no get her time.
She thot she was MTN, that she can never be brought down.
Always talking about nyash and capish and banning indiscriminately and with bias. Imagine if she is given power in real life.
Mtcheeew. [/s]


Anyway.
Forgiven.

It's the forgetting part that's the problem.

Ishilove:
I am yet to meet the fellow who can rip Ishilove to shreds. Seriously.

I am no longer a mod. I resigned since July 31 last year, so feel free to attempt to rip me to shreds. I will likely ignore you and report you though, because I am in a very light mood this evening.

And so you know, I will quote whoever I please, WHENEVER I please on this forum, capish?

Not interested in ripping u to shreds. Not my thing. And u certainly aren't worth the effort.

Lol. So you r no longer a MOD. That's karma. You were too powerdrunk anyway.

You can quote me as much as u like. It's my choice to decide wether u deserve an answer, capish?

sweetcocoa:
like I didn't know you'd say something like this, anyways it doesn't matter how long we argue over it, the fact remains that you cant prove that this little girl may not turn out better than her counterpart with hetro parents, simples.


You miss it, anyone who supports a little girl dancing the way you describe is mentally unstable, kids should be protected from anything sexual.

Sure, sure. There's no advantage in having a grown woman in the house who can relate to her esp when she hits puberty. No disadvantage in seeing two men kissing each other in her presence. No emotional turmoil in going to school and realising everyone has a mommy and daddy except her.
No emotional or psychological trauma at all. She's going to be fine and grow up well adjusted. Google has said so.


Ah, dont u know I must be a sexual pervert in seeing something wrong with a little girl pointing at her genitals while the mothers here cheer her on?

Ishilove:
This is just putting it mildly.

Postmann, I told ya you have poetry in you, didn't I?

You make a fine poet, yet. O yes you will.

How I wish I had the vocal ferocity of our mutual friend, I would have ripped u to shreds for quoting me.

U r the only MOD to have ever banned me for no reason whatsoever.

sweetcocoa:
But it's funny o, how a person types all this much nonsense in the name of insult and somehow believes it affects the other person in any way whatsoever.


5minsmadness, you decided to show up, how are you?

I dey like dele.

All these kind of arguments give me mental fatigue, we r arguing wether two men (gay or not) will be able to raise a child better than a heterosexual couple? Seriously?

I was going to pass through the thread but then was caught up by the sheer poetry in postman's verbal upheavals. The way in which he fluidly lacerates his victims in a hail of hilarious and yet deep-witted colloquiality leaves one stunned in...in... I can't find the words


Currently attending a children's party where a 6yr old girl is dancing lewdly while gesticulating at her vagina, but I guess our in-house liberals will find nothing wrong with it. After all, she isn't hurting anybody.


I digress.

postmann:
I never saw this, I would have put a virtual handcuff on your wrist so you type no further and spare humanity your grotesque ignorance.

England wasn't even the first country where English was spoken. It was Denmark according to some sources. Neither is English the original language of the British. English is a borrowed language from several other languages, some as a result of colonisation.

Is Christianity the whiteman's religion? Or because the whiteman brought Christianity to Africa, that makes it his? Hmmmmm. Intellectual slavery!!!

And of course to you technology is the whiteman's invention? Yeh kpa!!!

Little wonder you see the white man as a god. You remind me of the movie 50 shades of gray.

You must have spreaded your legs as wide as the East is from the West to have him drive you like a black slave, while you moan in foolish ignorance that you were been pummelled by a god.

You need intellectual rehab.

That's the name of your history teacher, who didn't put in extra work to mentally emancipate you from slavery.

Dude!

postmann:
Your point sound reasonable and sophisticated but, I'm sorry it has no bearing to truth and reality.

A good example is this. Daddy is home with you and mommy. And there's a greedy covetous armed robber who broke into the home at night, but daddy was apt and swift to knock him off his balls. Will you tell daddy that you won't be grateful for his intervention and protection because the assailant was a man?

There would always be an aggressor. There will always be a threat to peace and security and men who risk their lives selflessly to preserve their society deserve a heros' gratitude for all time.

The world has been deceived to think this peace will last forever. But a time of war and chaos and total disorder is approaching. Driven by famine, severe hunger, lawlessness and greed. And men will be highly sought after to defend their homes and community.

Which men?
Men that have lost their masculinity such that they think they no longer need to be the head of the house?
Men that believe in being equal to women?
Men that cry?
Men that jump to defend a woman even when she's is overwhelmingingly and blatantly wrong just because they want to be noticed by her?
Men that see nothing wrong in fvcking themselves?
Men that see nothing wrong in letting the woman pay the bill cos after all we are all equal?
Men that will do anything including humiliating themselves so they can get a little puccy?

A time of war is indeed coming when people will no longer have the luxury of discussing such stupid things as feminism, gay and freedom to do whatever you like 'as long as you are not hurting anybody'.

I pity the sissified men that will be called to duty then.

obiksam:
She have finally sue her husband to customary court after abandoning him and the kids after a year plus demanding for desolution of there marriage, refunding of bride prize, custody of the kids packing of properties and car. Please kindly comment an advice to my friend he have gone for first hearing but the only question his wife and she comfortably tell the chief judge that she dose not want the marriage she came with her father and that she have gotten a private job in lagos and hv two bedroom apartment. Pls dose customary have jurisdiction to Handel this case when they did white wedding but did not do court marriage? I believe that there is some thing wrong with her wife and family. After one year she just manifested from no were demanding for children you don't even no how they where. God forbids bad thing.

He marry person wey strong pass am.
Men should learn to be men and stop allowing all these modern day misbehaviour by women.
She left your house for a year, and u didn't demandyour bride-price back after 6weeks becos of what? If she no gree marry u u go die? Mtcheeew.

What kind of sissified men is this generation producing?

U see things like "she broke my heart". A girl can break your heart? You be oyibo man?

Nonsense.

Ok Now the parents have finally convinced her to leave him and worse than that, they want to use oyibo method and take away the little he has worked for. Money to hire a good lawyer to sue the lady for abandoning her kids for one year he no get. Family to back him up emotionally and financially he no get. Becos he wan marry fine girl.

Rubbish.

Men of this generation had better wake up else the women will sh1t all over you and you will smile and eat it all in the name of 'I am a modern man, a woman is my equal and I see nothing wrong in doing the dishes'. If u get breastmilk u for breastfeed the pikin sef.

Idiot.

Some men can die ontop womam matter as if puccy no dey everywhere.

Abeg make I comot before I vex.

DragonReborn:
Am I the only one seeing this person holding a severed human hand? Are you sure he didn't hack Hauwa to bits and had her name branded into his arm as punishment?

H0ly sh1t, I see it too

Lesbians

pet4ril:
girls like this hardly gets unwanted pregnancy, because they already know their way before the act

Oh, so we should encourage all girls to be like this na, so they will 'know their way' very well.

pet4ril:
Hehehheheh her own even pass the parents own sharp girl

Early pregnancy girl

Ioannes:
nice write up. could you please direct me to the book or link where you got this from. Thanks.

Thanks.
It was forwarded to a group I'm in. Don't know the source.

Acceptance phase: Check.

EfemenaXY:
I still don't get you 5minsmadness. Are you indirectly trying to tell us that married women cook for you outside of formal occasions?

Anyway, the reason I ask if this question is meant for the newly married or those that have been married for several years is because, a newly wedded woman is likely to have more single male friends than her counterpart whose been married for donkey years.

So, the likelyhood of her cooking for them would be more. I struggle to imagine under what scenario, but maybe if the single guy is a family friend perhaps?

No he is not a family friend. I doubt the husband knows about him, maybe he does but on a very casual note. Like she asks him what to eat at work and he tells her and she goes to prepare it.


That your second paragraph doesn't sound right, but I'm constrained for time now.