₦airaland Forum

Nonywendy:
I have been dating this my girl friend since 2017. She made me fall and believe in love, she ticked all the qualities I desire in a woman. When I we started dating she was in her 200L, and everything was going on smoothly. Now this is where the issue lies,
When she went for service in another state, I started noticing some changes, wen she comes back home during holidays I used to go through her phone.(note: she has access to my phone and I too).
So one of those period I realised she is seeing another guy in the state where she is serving. I confronted her and she opened up to me and confessed. I forgave her.

Then after like 4months again, I later noticed she is also seeing another guy different from the initial one I noticed, she denied that but I had to do my deep investigation and got an evidence, she opened up again, at this point I broke up with her and moved on. After like one month she came back begging for forgiveness, It took me time to heal and I forgave her.

Then this last one that broke the camel's back, I noticed she traveled to the state where she did her youth service for something and all this while I thought she was staying with her sister, not knowing she was staying with the first guy she dated while serving whch she apologised. She stayed with her for three good weeks. How I realized was, I called her line one early morning arnd 3am and a guy picked the call asking me who I am. At first, I froze cos I haven't been in that kind of situation, I calmed down and explained everything to the guy, and the guy also told me she has been with her for the past three weeks and that's the girl friend too. I was shocked. I have broken up with her finally cos I don't think forgiving a cheating partner is worth it.
The first time she cheated, 90% of my friends advised me to dump her ass and move on but I had to forgive on the basis of nobody is perfect, but this third time is a no no.
Now she has been begging and asking for forgiveness that she has really learnt her lessons. At this point I'm just so mad that I don't want to forgive her.
Now the big problem is that I'm always seeing her in my dream, I have not really moved on cos it's not easy for me. I have loved her for solid 6 yrs plus.
Note: all the family members from my side and her side are fully aware of our relationship and have approved but they are not aware that I have broken up. If you are my shoes will you forgive her for this very last time or will her cheating continues?
Your advise and suggestions will be well appreciated. Thank you

u b weyre. Person wey you suppose dump d first time. Continue till she gives u disease

pandax:
1. Normal IVF Procedure for compatible couples(AA/AS, AA/AA, AA/SS, AA/AC )= ovarian stimulation, egg retrieval, sperm retrieval, fertilization and embryo transfer

2. IVF Procedure for non-compatible couples (AS/AS, AS/AC, AC/AC) = ovarian stimulation, egg retrieval, sperm retrieval, fertilization, pre-implantation genetic screening (PGS), gender/sex selection and embryo transfer

a) PGS = Preimplantation genetic screening (PGS) is a screening test that can be performed on embryos created via in vitro fertilization (IVF) to genetically analyze the embryos prior to transfer. Couples who are at risk of having a child affected with an inherited genetic disease
are perfect candidates for the procedure

b) Gender/Sex Selection = This is a process by which the Clinic performing the IVF, will test to know the Sex of the embryos according to your request before the embryo transfer. I chose 2 Boys & 1 Girl.

did you do it in Nigeria? We’re the eggs retrieved much?

pandax:
I am sure you are an Apostle of Evolution Theory of Charles Darwin. One day S might turn to Z and we will have AZ as a kind of genotype . After all, we also have AC now as a genotype

Folks, if you have money and both of you are AS, please go and do Pre-Implantation Genetic Screening (PGS) with Gender Selection for circa 6m now. I did it and had all my healthy children at once. Amniocentesis and chorionic villus sampling (CVS) are cheaper options, but it could be emotionally draining for the parties involved.

that’s my plan ooo. I done Dey keep money for am ooo. I can be searching for AA like gold. I have everything I want in a woman that is AS. The money much ooo, but I have this feeling she would be worth it

AllenSpencer:
I want to believe the girl is hungry and why you had the effrontery to throw such proposal at her!

She should become a baby mama because of dual citizenship? Does dual citizenship guarantee her love, affection, or marriage. Will same dual citizenship put food on her table in an eventuality?

Location does not “GUARANTEE” that kids will be a blessing. There are records of kids becoming very successful within Nigeria and internationally.

I don’t see a single thing she has to gain. If she was selling the babies to you, that would have been better. She has absolutely nothing to gain. All promises made are not guaranteed. Moreover, the proposal is insultive.

for Christ sake she is already a baby mama

OGHENAOGIE:
see Ina mentality u de chop like na food she be... Na say d Lady de stay with am dats if she de her own and choose to even be discreet ll he Kno that's she's relating with other guys...

did you read dat stuff to the end? How can a lady be in your house and man Dey come pick am. It’s better she is discrete make I no know dan make I know abeg. You know Wetin you Dey talk. This is disrespect of the highest order.

Supreme145:
On point...shes trying to guilt trip me that I am threatening her with break up because she goes to work from my place but that's not my concern at the moment, told her to go stay with one of the numroues guys she's flirting with

the one wey burst my head na guy go come pick am
From your house, or she Dey go date with boy. Until you throw her out, she wld feel u cnt do without her

Supreme145:
I've been dating my girlfriend for over 18 months now and it has been a bumpy ride. One major I issue I have had with her has been her relationship with other men. She spends a lot of time in my place and each time we have issues her one stop solution is to go out and see other guys.

In fact 90% of our issues have come from this same relations with other men. When I complain she makes it look like I am insecure and overly jealous. I have made it known to her that it's wrong to go on dates with other guys when you are in my place especially when we have issues. She would always insist that they are just friends.

She recently got a job close to my house so she had to move in though she's barely at home cos the work is a 8am to 8pm job. She insisted on the job cos she would be able to learn her desired skills while been paid though the pay is very poor.

She would come home and gist me about how guys have been asking her out in her work place and all. Yesterday she even showed a number that a guy wrote for her on a piece of paper and asked her to call him. We later had a minor disagreement cos I saw her sitting on the floor trying to burst a boil on her laps, she started scolding me that I shouldn't be starting at a woman's private part like that, I pointed out that she had panties on and I was just concerned cos I saw something that looked like a drop of blood on the tiles. This resulted in an argument so I just ignored her.

I later observed her copying out the number given to her on her phone amidst other giggles while chatting with other guys online. I overheard her talking to a guy she just met about him coming to pick her up today so she could follow him to church and then go to work from there. This is someone that have never attended church anytime she costs even though a Catholic church is just a stone throw from my house. I voiced out my displeasure and she said I had no right to interfere in her business since I was giving her attitude.

It rained this morning so she couldn't go to church as planned but I am worried that I am dating a terrible flirt and this is someone I am thinking of getting married to. I had to chat her up at work to complain but she still saw nothing wrong with her relationship with other male folks and told me that I am just being insecure and anytime we have issues she would still leave the house cos she can't stay in a house with someone giving her attitude.

I told her I would no longer continue with the relationship since she sees her attitude as normal and she dosen't give me peace of mind which every man craves for. She started guilt tripping me and talking plenty but I already made up my mind. I can't deal with am unrepentant flirt.

Do you guys think I am over reacting?

how men take these things is what I don’t still understand. The last time I misbehaved like this for woman na when I do my
Nysc and I was still just 21. The moment I notice u r that kinda of person, na to just put u on cruise Dey chop you ooooo, while I Dey find better person. When I find d person I discard u

shyenar999:
Base on any job Would one be employed on a visit visa without much stress?

you won’t be employed legally to any job in Canada with a visit visa

Munachimso30:
You mean LMIA job ?

Normal jobs

Mis3man:
Please house what province is more affordable and have reasonable amount of job opportunities in Canada I'm looking out for a province one can easily settle in and not too expensive also if anyone care to share apartment to split rent
If anybody know any social media group where we have a VV community like this please link me up I want to keep in touch with people already inside Canda for first hand information

manitoba no bad. Na where I Dey. There are jobs sha but e fit take time. But if you are ready to do any kinda job pending when God do am for you, no p.

squash47:
Lately, I have been reading posts about men saying their women must provide something for their family. Like, help pay children's school fees, feedings, house rents and other stuffs.
And I got curious.

So, as a man, if you marry a woman and God forbid, she dies and leave you alone with the kids, won't you be able to take good care of yourself and your children without her support?

No one prays for evil, but let's be real, bad things happen.
So, men,if your wife dies now leaving you and the kids, how are you going to manage the situation ?

Mynd44, Nlfpmod, please push this to the right section.

nonsense reasoning. What is the man die? She no go take care of pikin

Anny69:
What course did you study and what's your GPA? I'm just curious.

na by dat one?

Chironks:
Love is beautiful, however, it can be challenging to manage.

How can one look past the partners' flaws and love them regardless?

Flaws in this context is when a partner lacks common sense.

you don’t

Rtk4:
Before i narrate everything, I would like to say that i swear I'm not a SIMP, I was just trying to be a good husband right from the beginning not knowing it was gonna lead to this.

I'm married with three children and my wife is not working for the past 7 years of our marriage. I'm responsible for everything in the house. I'm not complaining about the too much responsibilities but i really wanna end the marriage due to the following reasons, my wife lacks respect for me as a husband sometimes the way she talks to me as if I'm her boy or her mate. This woman called my wife is also very ungrateful. She never appreciate anything. I can't correct her when she's wrong without her getting angry, most times when i send her to buy something, her mood changes or she starts complaining, i can't tell her to cook what my appetite yearns for without her complaining especially swallow. The only thing this woman does consistently are as follows;

**Please could you stay with the kids i was called that my cousin is sick and they are in the hospital

**Please could you stay with the kids my mum's sister is sick and I want to go greet them

**Please could you stay with the kids we just lost our uncle

**Please could you stay with the kids my father's brother wants to see me

**Please could you stay with the kids, this, that and that.... I'm so angry because it doesn't allow me go out to Hussle. One of the most annoying part is when i have an important place to go, i'll have look for where to drop the kids or go with them? Sometimes you need to see the shame in me due to how people always look at me carrying 3kids up and down everywhere as if i don't have a wife. Even if i want to go and watch ball alot of times i'll have to go with them. She has 5 female elder siblings who are all married, why don't they behave like that to their husbands? Sometimes she'll be sitting or maybe she's doing something and one of the kid tells her he/she wants to poo, she'll tell the child go and meet your father, I'll have to go put the child on potty. The frustration is too much. I really wanna end the marriage. Most times when i report some things to the mother, the mother always looks for a way to cover for her daughter, the mother never sees anything wrong in what her daughter does. Do you know one of the thing she does that has gotten me fed up? I'll be in the middle of a very important work or meeting. This woman will start calling and calling, you will think it's something very important, the next thing she'll start texting me that won't you come home? She wants to go and check on her this or that who is in the hospital. So i should leave something very important which will give me money just to come and stay with the children so you could go visit a family member? This is a place you can go with the children. Please guys how do i go about ending this marriage because she is very violent and i don't want to create a scene because she likes creating scenes.

I don’t see marriage as a cage ooo. If e no work, separate

Hassanmaye:
The site is blocked Oga now, you can't visit it via there website

maybe na different one you go.

SmartPolician:
Una get mind oh - Sleeping with public toilets!

The biggest lie men have been told is that prostitutes take care of themselves more than regular ladies.

oga if your babe has slept with more than 2 people, no difference. Just be say one Dey monetize am, the other Dey do love.

Jazzman01:
But you know this doesn't make sense. How can you have a wife at home and still keep spending heavily on sex outside.

so what should he do in ds case, still suffer?

C2Ok:
You had to quote the whole thing?

is that a problem?

addmole:
I and My wife have been married for 5 years. We are based here in Lagos. She's 35 years old. We are doing very okay and living comfortably. Since we got married, my wife hated sex so much. I am not even trying to sugarcoat this. She doesn't want to hear you talk about it or she does it. There's no one in the family that haven't tried to settle our differences since we got married. She was never like this when we were dating. It's been 1 issue to the other. She doesn't initiate sex, and when she does accept you to have sex, it's missionary style and it's just 1 round. Ah, me wey dey like knack wella. This woman begin change am for me. Lol. She doesn't want to hear you discuss sex.

Anyway sha, lets move on...

5 YEARS ago, her mum came to my house to kneel down and tell me I am stressing her daughter that I should not kill her with sex. Her then-unmarried sister then asked if I ama dog? Ah, insult. Anyway, I don forgive her. I spoke to my wife and told her what is the meaning of this? What kind of lies are you feeding your family with? This is the same person who happens to make just 1 round of sex. Just 1 round. She lies flat on her back. Once you are done, she quickly pushes you away if you stay on top of her for more than 10 to 15 minutes. There were times she would hit me if I try to initiate sex. I reported to her elder brother. He elder brother warned her. She stopped. She moved to kicking me anytime we initiate sex on bed, i reported to my pastor, he spoke to her and then, she stopped. My pastor told me i have to be patient with her. I said OK.

Omo...
The only time we make love is just 1 round, missionary style and that's it. She says she has pain on her stomach. I have been patient for 7 years with her. I told her anytime she's strong enough, we can make out. That there's no problem.

I have been pressured to cheat on her many times. i HAVE BEEN REALLY PRESSURED. Its just not easy. Her family have insulted me for demanding sex from her. Lol. The thing tire me. I see no where i am demanding. We don't do any other position apart from the missionary style. We do not even kiss. This is a woman that doesn't want you to kiss in in anyway. Even sometimes, she shouts at you when you try to be romantic to kiss her unexpectedly just to spies up our love life. She doesn't even want you to cuddle her on bed. She wants to be alone. Make money, attend to her business, vibes, laugh with friends and family and that's it. When it comes to sex, don't go there discussing that with her about making out.

I even had to retort to preparing her mind for sex by sending her a position we would try on WhatsApp, she would leave the message on read and not respond. When you talk to her about what you sent to her, she would just tell you, she's not strong to make love.

ANOTHER PART OF HER:
My wife is a very bitter person full of anger. If you try to tickle her when she's cooking in the kitchen to play with her, she gets angry and warns you not to try such. My wife doesn't want you to play with her. I am not writing all these to make it look I am a victim here. But all these are my experiences. I have to pour it out. I NEED SOME ADVICE.

There were many times, we agreed on separating. But we have already children and we used to think about these because the quarrels and the disrespect, sex and everything is causing a whole lot on us.

We do not have any form of healthy discussion very well. Before you know it, we are quarrelling over the place, she's shouting. There was a time we quarrelled that after throwing a Gotv remote at her, she fainted. She woke up before we got to the hospital. She almost died. I told her, she needs to stop her anger and control herself and enjoy her marriage. She just won't listen. She's an Edo woman.

I have tried many times to leave the marriage because it's affecting my mental health. Sometimes I regret about getting married to her. Sometimes, I just feel, maybe I CAN TRY MORE and give her a chance. When you call her to discuss our sex life, about her anger and bitterness, she doesn't apologise. She hardly apologise. Even when I get to explain her part on why she was wrong, she claims she's right until maybe someone hears us arguing before she would reluctantly apologise.

I have been battling a really starved sex life, full of a woman with bitterness, anger and pride who never apologise. She's quick to advice other women on Facebook, She would video call friends, give them advice and her family how they need to maintain peace with their relationship. But she never seem to give me respect in anyway in her own own. Hmmmm.

Recently, my wife brought out another timetable that she cannot cope making out with me the way she does. Which is 3 times a week. That she can only be available to make love 2 times a week. This 2 times is just 1 round each. This is how she wants it. I immediately responded to her that I feel her pain. I understand. She cannot be pressured just to make it look like she wants to please me that I would rather get a side chic. Yes, i know this was wrong to tell her, but i am frustrated. She disrespects me and starve me of sex and she's even bending the rules again. She responded that 'ok that I am free to do what i LIKE'.

i decided to bring this here to know the comments from people. I would like to get advice from persons who are going through similar things like this and advice me on what to do.

Some of you might say, call her and talk to her. I have done that several times since in the last 5years. I did it last night and twice today. I have spoken to her. She promised she would change, she would not only repeat the same thing but make things worst the next time.

She disrespects me a lot. I have sometimes left the house but come back after families get to call me. She would change for a week and return to her old self.

What do I DO? Please make your responses constructive enough.

I wonder how this is even an issue. Find side chicks or visit codedruns.com. Na u Dey stress ur self ooo

sgtponzihater1:
No problem bro.

Christ thinks divorce is bad and gave only one exception for it. No one should go into marriage with divorce in mind. God hates it, and it complicates life not just for the parties, but children if they are involved. This is for a Christian marriage, and does not account for all marriages.

That said, I would still advice people to desist from marrying a man or woman against their parents will, as there is generally wisdom with old age. As smart as believe I am, I am humble enough to accept that my parents have seen much more than I have. This is my opinion and people can choose to accept it or run along with what they feel.

All the best

no one wished for divorce. But please reply to this question. Would you still remain in a marriage dat wants to kill you? Well maybe you are a church person but I am not

sgtponzihater1:
If your mum does not support a marriage, the most prudent thing is to let go of it. Someone else will come along.

An only suggestion is if the Lord almighty specifically ask you to go ahead. Otherwise avoid this route.

I still don’t understand why a parent will tell u who not to marry. For Christ sake, marry who you want, if it doesn’t work, it’s fine. You are not the first. Divorce is not bad. You guys talk like dis marriage thing na do or die affair. If I marry a woman that wants to kill me, I go divorce am straight. Let him make his mistake and learn

omejeb:
I have done about two tests within the window periods..the first was 3weeks after exposure then the other one I did was 10weeks after the exposure but all came out negative..but the lab scientist told me I have to come back for a confirmatory test in three months time and that should be next month...i don't know the chances of it still going to show negative...fear wants to kill me here 😪😪😪😪

wait till 12 weeks to confirm. E fit still Dey form

Lewisjohnson:
Mosies Caicedo signed for Chelsea Recently.

"I can't date a guy that's still hustling" bla bla bla.

Hope Nigerian girls will learn from this two photos??

oga better go hustle. This is just one of the successful ones. What of people wey go blow leave the babe nko? Abeg make everyone do Wetin dem like n forget this cheap blackmail. Nobody wan suffer

BelittlePaul:
FELLOW NAIRALANDERS,Abeg i need una help oooo, my girlfiriend went for a scan this week and it was revealed that she is pregnant
Na boredom sef cause make we do the thing oo and i don't even have a job now, please i need una help make God provide job before she born as ABORTION IS NOT EVEN IN MY AGENDA AT ALLLLL,
Abeg nothing is too small to support from my good heart
PalmPay
9113038350
Adiela Messiah
Thank you

thunder fire you. You no get money you go Bleep raw. U come social media say make we contribute for u because you feel you no wan do abortion. Better go do am

Puss360:
Do you date every friend??

would every friend take u shopping?

Puss360:
I've had the unfortunate encounter of my life happen like dis....
Mine sef was birthday...
Met two weeks before my birthday, we began chatting, so I decided to use my birthday to meet..
Lol, we went shopping o, we ate...he really spent sha...
It was December...
January came, new year resolution, I decided to cut off, lol he became angry...oo..
Said many things, I couldn't recall, but he mentioned the birthday outing..
But we weren't dating, I told him...

So Nigerians guys has this "I spend on you, you are mine" mentality

why would you even agree to go on a date with someone you dnt want to date

Puss360:
After seeing this topic -https://www.nairaland.com/7803848/leave-good-woman-man-because -
I decided to ask when does "We are dating" officially starts in a relationship..

Assuming a guy exchange number with a girl on Friday, they began chatting, on Friday the following week, they met for lunch...

Fast forward to a month later, the guy discovered that Tuesday before the Friday they met for lunch, the girl had sex with a frnd..

Can the guy claim the girl cheated while they were dating??

I'm confused here ..

you don go fk, conscience come Dey hold u

Adeoye11:
Have a friend in this case, but his is somehow.
This my friend had a girlfriend that they dated for three months and then had a misunderstanding in the third month of dating each other which makes them to block each other on all socials but my friend told me that they do always see in church and that he still likes the girl.
So my guy called the girl in church one day and the girl was so happy to respond so they settled their misunderstanding.
After about three months of coming back my friend discovered that this said girl is fucking one rich sugar daddy in this same church.
Which this man really used to take care of this girl by taking her to shopping, expensive restaurants and buying her provisions that even sometimes the man used to deny himself of his place of work so as to carry this girl to market and going home late to his family.
When my friend enquired from his babe why she is doing that the girl said because my friend left him.
And so when they came back together, the girl said the sugar daddy is not fucking her again but they always do the rest of sexual thing and that he still pays her bills, that it is hard for her to let the sugar daddy go quick because he has exposed the girl to some good life and that the man bought her an electric sewing machine of about 200k.
My guy told me that the girl really confessed alot she did with the sugar daddy in the period they had their own misunderstanding and that she apologized to this my guy but the girl has still not cut communication with this man, that at some point when the girl is with him this man still calls.
So of recent my guy told me that kasala don burst for some members of the church that this sugar daddy is Fucking the girl and so the girl is trying to seek solace in my guy and trying to avoid church cos of shame.

In this kind of case what can my friend do? And why did this said girl tells my friend everything she did with the man.
My friend said he still loves the girl and that the girl loves him too.
And that he plans to marry the girl

your friend is sick in the head. How can you still plan to marry her

Lutherblaq:
They say Forgiveness is the firs step to fixing relationship issues. It gives you a window to understand the reason behind your partner’s actions.

Being cheated on is one of the most traumatic feelings one can go through in any relationship. There are times when the love and affection between two people decrease due to various factors.

Cuddles, romance, and communication become less frequent with time. It is in times like these either of the partners may search for love outside.

As a man/woman, tell us;
Can You Leave A Good Woman/Man Because They Slept With
Someone By Mistake?

which one is by mistake? Did the preen enter by mistake?

NairalandSARS:
Hello fam.

Please I am in urgent need for 70000 Naira to go for NYSC camp this week 🙏

I will pay back N11000 every month for 7 months, making a total of N77000.

Please, if you are interested, PM me for more details or WhatsApp me at

why not use a loan app

Temporaryacc:
I have a well-known acc by the way but needed to post with this with a new one due to the dark nature of my story. Don't want anyone judging me unnecessarily.

Everything I'm putting below is real and actually happened to me, regardless of how difficult it is to believe.


Will be a tad lengthy, but please bear with me.




My fiancé and I are settling down soon


Recently, I discovered that she slept with not one, but two persons in the first two months of our relationship which we've been in for a year.

She swears that she didn't know what came over her at the time. Until this discovery, there were more than enough indicators that she has been loyal to me. She doesn't do anything shady and has been a very supportive woman. I would naturally have trust issues with a girl with her beauty and killer body, but she's just trustworthy.


Now, she wants to swear in the traditional way that it was only those two and that it happened in the early days our relationship just so I can believe her. She also wants to take a oath for me to be assured that she's mine. I didn't bring any of this up; she did.


I told her I would think about it but lied to her that in my family, a girl must be cleansed when she cheats before the relationship can continue. I just came up with this to know the lengths she's willing to go to prove herself to me. She agreed without hesitation.

The cleansing, which I made up, involves eating bitter kola and receiving 11 heavy lashes on the back while she's naked. I was surprised she still wanted to go ahead with it. At this point, I couldn't even retract my words and come plain that's it's all a lie.

Four days ago that she visited, she had already bought the items herself — a very thick cane and bitter kola. I told her to strip naked and lie on the bed. I said some useless things into the kola and gave her to chew. The force with which each stroke landed on her back, I didn't know where they came from. I watched as she screamed and bawled while I her continually beat her. The last stroke was with all my might and she screamed the entire house down.

She cried into my arms after everything and begged me to forgive her. What I did doesn't make sense by the way, and I know it. Now she's ready to swear and also take an oath, but I don't want any of that. I actually trusted her before all these issues. And I don't even believe in swearing. I've forgiven her, but I feel guilty for what I did.


What do you guys suggest I do?

mumu. I wonder why she even did all ds things to try n please mumu. Dem suppose arrest you for domestic violence

OlawaleBammie:
Sir advise me, want to relocate to Canada, then switch to tech at entry level or internship...

The only problem I am having is that I don't have anybody over there to give me headlight or clue about the job market for my level(entry level) if its feasible or not.

do you already have a path to coming to Canada or you just Dey start