₦airaland Forum

Neddstark:
When women get married, they believe they have the perfect landing and can do whatever the fûck they want.
It is left for you to let them know that this marriage of exploitation can end and nothing will happen. If you after this, she doesn't improve then bros go back to single and searching than forever unhappiness.

exactly.

Luvibk:
Hello everyone
Please I need help with affordable accommodation in Winnipeg

you coming with family? What kinda accommodation

Lifeinlight:
why can't you tell us how things change without going into full details? At least it'd give OP and so many people going through one difficulty or the other sort of hope. I don't think what you said is convincing enough for him and others not to give up and probably keep pushing

I am not trying to convince anyone. I just want him to believe.

hookupagent1:
I just think I have failed in life, each day I wake up the first thought on my mind is always sucide, how to end it all because I feel hopeless and think I can't make it or that I'm cursed, I have been unemployed since I graduated and no skill, I'm 29, will be 30 this year but I don't know what to do with my life, I'm clueless and don't know how to fix mylife, I don't have passion or zeal to learn any Skill because I don't think at my age I can cope, with the high cost of living now, who will I depend on while learning or what best to do just Pity my family because with the level of the depression in me now I don't think I can survive it beyond this year if nothing changes.I just feel I should go on exile I just don't know how to help my self and I don't speak up or seek for help.

6 years ago. I was almost in same shoe. I even made a whole thread her on nairaland about my frustration. Fast forward till today, things changed. Believe bro.

gaby:
He should continue paying her loans. Indulging and reinforcing her borrowing like our government is a very good way to love his mother.

no mind am

Nwatulee:
Hi guys am not a good writer and will try to keep this post as short as possible.... I met a girl 5 years ago at first year we are just fiends and bedmates, a year after we decided to take things serious.. First forward to covid 19 she moved in with me a year after my precious business collapse due to China scam.. She tried her best to contribute the little she have even upto changing my boxers and money for hair cut she provided... The relationship has been good with the off and on.. But my gf have a bad habit that she is quickly to adapt to things both good or bad things.. Which to me I worry a lot... she cheats on me with other guys one time I hacked her WhatsApp I saw all her sexpades with other guys... I talk to her about it.... she begged but to no avail she refuse to change.... Fast forward till last week I keep complaining how she always come back late.. Snext 2 days after complaining she texted me with a picture that she is out chilling with her girls.. I was so angry because we just hard a semilar argument about, late nights days ago I told her if she didn't drive home next 30min she should just remain there.. She replied she is on way.. I was so angry and tell not to worry omo this girl stayed back.. Went clubbing and stayed in the hotel next morning she sent me a video of her and the girls in the hotel.. I didn't reply because I was angry.. Talking to you like this she is yet to come back to the house since Friday called all her siblings.. She was with none of them. .. and I began to wonder na person wey I Wan marry be this? what if we get married and it got worst? Thank God I got back on my feet in business and now am doing all possible best we get married this year and relocate to abroad next year.. One part of me have actually decided to let go and just block her off the other part is not willing.. What should I do guys.. Because me am am 33 years and trying to settle down..

how do you think she will change. How do you guys even forgive who cheats on you. I just dnt understand. Better dump her and find another person

Yugoslavia247:
Are you sure it's the man that owns the children

do you think it’s every child you born must be SS. Please note, you have a 75% chance of giving birth to a healthy child

Enemyofpeace:
I was wondering if it’s ok to finally invoice my kids for all the expenses incurred when I subscribed to being their mother?

dem no beg to b born oo. Na you go born them when dem no send u

shortgun:
Better Stay with your dad.
You will get tired of that freedom you are looking for
You want to decide how your father scolds you?
An African father?

shu

PewpewS32:
Nairaland,

Yes, I'm Canadian looking to semi-permanently move to Nigeria for ministry opportunity.

Reading online tells me I'll be fine, but would love to hear a local perspective.

I'll be selling my home, vehicles, furniture... everything and starting over in Nigeria (Lekki, Lagos area).

Everything sold and done I would be coming with around N450,000,000.00 to N500,000,000.00. I know this is a lot in Nigeria. For real, I know. What I would like to know is let's say I don't make any money whatsoever, how long will that last after paying for a 3 bdrm house, car, furniture etc there? Believe me, here in Canada this isn't that much... it's not below poverty, but also not rich either. (Middle Class).

Where do I stand in Nigeria with this much?

Thanks,
Pewpew

what do you mean semi permanently move

yakson84:
Hypocrates of highest order. You enjoy to watch strippers at clubs but dnt want to marry them. Who do you want to marry them. If you wont marry strippers, dnt go to clubs.

you funny. It’s simple, we enjoy watching those things, but we know is not morally right. So who will marry dem is their problem not mine

Elzazzi:
I will try and make this brief and please ignore the errors.

I was with my close friend yesterday evening. While we were chilling together, a call came in on his phone. it was his cousin that called telling what had happened and also seeking his advice. Now this is what happened, this his cousin has been dating this lady for about a year I think and he has already proposed to her and even took her to his parents and siblings. He also visited the lady family and did some introduction. Now April this year has been chosen for the wedding ceremony proper and a date has been fixed. This is where trouble started.

My friend cousin created a WhatsApp group for his wedding ceremony, he added all his friends and some of his classmates to this group so they can join hands and make his wedding day memorable. He posted his wedding IV to the group and some pictures of him and the lady, one of his old time classmate recognized her and immediately called him for a private meeting for urgent discussions.


He visited him the next day and this guy told him everything about his fiancée. How she used to be a stripper in Lagos clubs years back and how he and his friends had wild 3some with her. She used to base in Lagos as a call girl but relocated to Abuja and that’s where she met my friend cousin. After all these revelation this guy was in deep pain as he had already gone far with the weeding preparations. Of course his old time classmate advised him not to marry her, but this guy loves her so much and he is in a big dilemma of what to do next. As he thinking of leaving the country and go start life with her elsewhere.

Can such past truly be overlooked?

After my friend explained everything to me, I was just short of words but of course I advised he shouldn’t marry her. What advice would you give him in such a situation my fellow Nlanders ?

olosho no Dey stop. Na break dem Dey take. Na dis girls wey dem go Dey advice to calm down that time, but they will tell you it is their live. Make you guy no go be simp

AtoningBlood:
Thanks, I have decided on what to do. Thanks to everyone who gave meaningful thoughts.

tell us

Mindlog:
If he must relocate back to the urban area, get him a "self-contain" apartment as he needs go through the phase of 'mea culpa, mea culpa, mea maxima culpa.

I even pity am say 1 bedroom. Just imagine, person wey no Dey bring d money Dey demand 3 bedroom. I wonder how nice people are. Me, God forbid I succumb. It’s cus he knows this one pays attention na why him Dey demand

AtoningBlood:
My story is long, please read and advise if you experience something similar with your retired parent, or how do you create a balance.

I can't just believe this will happen to him so quickly when it was just 2020 I told him never to go to the village. Ohhh,

na cus you Dey ans am na why him Dey make such demands. Be like ur other siblings. Tell him you can rent just 1 bedroom, if he needs 3, he should add money. Na you Dey enable am

Imotman:
Hello.

I'm 35 and right now I'm a little bit lost on choosing a potential life partner.. I went through a slight delay career-wise, but God came through and things picked up within the past 1 year. I met a lady also during this time and we've been dating. We both love each other with the mindset of getting married soon.. I was looking forward to tell my mom who I hadn't seen in almost a year about her.

The twist now is my aunt (a very close confidant) whom I told before anyone is trying to pitch me to another lady abroad. (I don't know how she looks or who she is as I write)...

My mum is also tilting in that direction and urging me to consider the other lady abroad, based on my aunt's positive recommendation.

My family absolutely mean well for me. Right now I'm a bit lost on the whole situation as my main goal for the new year is to get married and relocate abroad.

I'm concerned if I'll be able to get on well with this 'other' lady in question or should I just insist on settling with the current person I'm seeing.. this is the real dilemma.

now , let’s reverse the case. If this lady whom you claim to love has a suitor from abroad, and she was considering it, how will you feel.

Thisisvenuz:
I met this lady early last year and we fell in love we were Soo close and she was like the type of woman I wanted at that time so instead of playing with our future I proposed to her and she accepted then we started planning marriage. Then I noticed after the proposal this lady started being to demanding she wants this she wants that which I try my best and provide but when I don't this lady will call me names this and that the wrist chain this lady wears alone is about 150k but she always tells me I did nothing so I decided to end it all yesterday. Did I took the right decision?

omo you did the right thing ooo. I wonder how people insult people for things they can’t even provide for themselves

BondRiv:
Yours must be ashamed of you. Continue observing.

weyre

BondRiv:
Confused sheep.

ur mom

BondRiv:
UN observer, don't bring any child to this world to suffer because of your selfishness and wilful ignorance.

It is also a cause for concern that you guys are many. The government has to carry out massive orientation.

cow. Wetin concern you. If I bring na your problem?

duduade:
If you both are not ready to leave each then you follow through with the alternative... I personally know couples who did and are happily married and blessed with one/two kids ..


Like I said

If you both truly truly are ready to walk and work all the way

If you know you can't then separate.. same with the OP


This matter has been treated several times on nairaland

ok

Anwons:
There is this saying that missed or escaped animal from a trap are always big.
Relationship that has issues bothering on genotype and disagreement from parents are the most amazing and interesting ones for the people involved.

Very difficult for any of the partner to call it off, if the man mentions it, the lady will act as if that's the end of the world. All infatuation and inability to live up to responsibility.

Over all, be strong and decisive, same to ladies, you won't regret it later

break this down well to me. What is the message

efembaba:
What ways have you found out in your research please?

checking the pregnancy in the womb

efembaba:
My fiancée and I have been engaged for about 7 months now. About when we started, she told me her genotype was AA of which she showed me the test result so I never really took it upon myself to confirm mine which I had been believing as AA.

Recently I went to confirm mine and it turned out to be AS. In shock, I asked her to recheck hers since the result she'd been working with was from when she was a baby. She checked at the first hospital and it surprisingly turned out to be AS. Immediately she did another one at another hospital/lab and it still came out as AS.

I know what most people will say is that that's the right test and we are not compatible medically (which though gruesomely painful, I understand).
but my questions are then these:

1. How do genotype test results change over time? I know they don't since it's based on genetics but how on earth was it possible that she tested AA before but not now (my head is so messed up right now).

2. I know the plain, straightforward answer for situations like this, for most people, is that we path ways due to the outcome of our genotype and I get it. But I want to ask, is there any possibility of an alternative at all? Maybe something that's not so conventional that some people in such situations have done to help them still marry and bear children without issues.
I understand if you think this question is stupid but I'm am a possibility thinker and I know that the world/internet is filled with possibilities.

If you know, please kindly help out. Thank you....

we many wey Dey your shoe bro, I have been thinking my next step for almost a year now cus d thought of losing her kills me. I have made research and there are ways, however, they are really emotional and traumatic. So for now, I just Dey observe

Legendguy:
The rate at which girls involve in prostitution ( olosho, ashawo, hook up, sugar daddy, friends with benefit, girl friend sexual relationship) is at alarming rate.
I was passing through a road side and I saw girls calling my attention for a night.
I'm afraid of getting married because lots of girls are involved in this manace.
I'm just afraid of marrying girl with high body count higher than our ages combined

Can someone advise on how to navigate these girls and get a good and decent girl marry?

Mind you, I haven't spoiled or disvirgin any girl

you never even see anything. Go to codedruns.com and see regular girls ad for ashawo.

jsp0:
she cheat on me and i told her not to call me again last week

since days now i can't stop thinking about her, I have even lose appetite a bit,i just can't get her out of my mind

although i have cheated on her wit her friend b4 and i begged her


I don't have the courage to woo girl

i can't stop thinking about her should i continue the no contact rule maybe she will call me to beg or i should rather call her, please

you can call her back but just know, she will do it again

Duyt1798:
Hi guys!

I hope this my post gets to the FP, so I can get insights from a wider audience; even I know some might not make sense, but one thing I've learnt from the short time I joined this platform, is that - sense dey inside nonsense.

Pardon me, my write fit dey a bit lengthy.

I currently work with a multi-national startup coy. My net pay is a bit above 400k naira (this's at the moment), I've worked for about 2 years. I'm married with two kids and expecting the third.

Now my dilemma is that, I've not been able to save up funds, I feel like my living condition doesn't reflect what I earn. Shingbai like this, I no get for account. The last I could remember, I go deep hand for forex, e nearly give me hypertension (I lost about 2m). I still dey pay debt wey I incur as a result.

Now where I need assistance is, looking at the amount I'm earning, how do I spend? Please for those that will be kind enough to give suggestions, let it practically explained, as in help me break am down to the amount wey I suppose spend, how I suppose spend am, and wetin I suppose save.

I believe say many family people dey here wey get better experiences.

Thanks 🙏.

because u dey earn 400k u go dey born 3.

Salasa:
Ladies and Gentlemen. 😃

I was not a chronic masturbator, I just did it once in a while. Sometimes once in a week, twice or thrice at max. Sometimes a week off...

I just did it when I was bored and felt the need to pleasure myself sexually as I have had no sex.

Long story short, I found out I was always urinating frequently, I thought it was normal but something kept telling me it may be as a result of masturbation.

Because, each time I release, I must be forced to urinate, it was as if releasing means urination as the next thing.

I would urinate every 3 hours or so.

Ladies and gentlemen, ever since this year, I've not beat my meat and I don't feel the need to urinate every now and then. Like today, I've urinated only twice since morning.

Please who has experience this? I'm forced to believe masturbation makes one prone to frequent urination which is embarrassing and inconveniencing.

This masturbation sef, not like it's sweet, na babe I no get.

you will still beat your meat again

kelvinakproko:
Thank You Nairalanders for the counsel offered on my previous thread (link below).
So yesterday I threatened to quit the relationship if she doesn't tell the truth about the movement I spoke about in detail in the previous thread. She confessed that there's been a sugar daddy (he already has a wife). She said she didn't know what came over her. She had spent a whole week before with him some months earlier unknowing to me before the last movement that made me suspect something wasn't fine.

Now I guess where the financial support was coming from then. They both discuss me and the sugar daddy even give her tips on how to cover up after meeting him. From the chats she showed me, the sugar daddy always ask after me. She said he's been asking her out before we even began the relationship and that it was difficult for her to stop. From the chats she showed me, she had severally told the man that she wants to stop and she ain't cool with the games anymore that she loves her boyfriend.

I also discovered that since the day I suspected her movement, she hasn't been seeing him anymore and evidences from their chat thereafter supports that. She told him her guy is already suspecting her and that she doesn't want to lose her relationship because of several support or help he has given her in the past.

It's been hard to swallow the revelation but she's been crying since yesterday that I should forgive her that she's stopped everything with the man. She called the man that she's already told me about everything that's been going on. And she told him he's disconnecting from him in anyway and she blocked him on all communication channels she has with him.

I couldn't sleep last night. I really want to end it all up despite the fact that there's evidence she stopped the whole thing with the man after I suspected her movement. What do you think I should do?

Link To Previous Thread
https://www.nairaland.com/7961986/forgive-when-she-hasnt-said

I know deep down you want to forgive her but let me tell you something, she would do it again I promise you. She would just get smarter about it

Fahvvy:
Clearly, you don't ...

na y I ask for clarity na