|
Career / Re: Japa: From Bank Manager To Skyscraper Cleaner by ashjay001(m): 9:52pm On Dec 16, 2023 |
Iamzik:
What do you mean by "earn more"? Does he pay his bills in dollars or naira?
How long will he need to work that factory job to pay off a home mortgage? He has access to a mortgage?! They both could afford cars and comfortable accommodation within months of getting there, on a menial salary. Whatever bills they're paying, what is leftover is more than thier Naija salary |
Career / Re: Japa: From Bank Manager To Skyscraper Cleaner by ashjay001(m): 3:54pm On Dec 16, 2023 |
planetx: Trust me deep inside they are not happy doing care work and factory work, a big step down from their position in NIG. Forget whatever lies they are telling you, deep inside they knew they fvcked up They're not happy but they won't come back home, given the choice. Instead, they continue to hope for a better offer. Infact, one is still employed as a remote worker with his former org. Yet, they continue to find ways to extend their stay and make it permanent. We're real with ourselves. A care worker earning 2 times his salary without the loans, with flexible timing? As much as they miss the status they had in Nigeria, they still wont exchange jaapaa for anything |
Career / Re: Japa: From Bank Manager To Skyscraper Cleaner by ashjay001(m): 3:38pm On Dec 16, 2023 |
bolabizzle: Just got word from a friend about someone who made the move from being a bank manager in Nigeria to working as a skyscraper cleaner in the UK. 😕
Smart move or not?
Fortunately, he's earning more. Though, a more physical job. 2 of my friends too. 1 a bank manager too, in a major location, is doing care job. Currently earns more than he ever did as a bank worker and has more access to a soft life. The 2nd one worked for an international organization. Big boy life in Naija. Now a factory worker but actually earns more than he ever did. Kids education is more quality than what he was getting in Nigeria, even with the high school fees he was paying. 400k/kid. As long as they're coping, God speed 9 Likes |
Family / Re: Am I Being Unreasonable Or Is My Wife Selfish? by ashjay001(m): 11:44am On Sep 17, 2023 |
EkelediliBuhari: Let’s agree this is my story….
Pardon my long write up but I needed to get a perspective from a fresh eye/mind. I’m married for 3 years now with 2infants.
Am I overthinking or does my wife have other plans?
My dad is an established accountant with over 3 decades of experience at the highest level of his occupation in 2 multinationals. He is now retired and consults. Presently, he lives a day at a times cos he barely has plans for his firm (he is over 70 and doesn’t have anybody he’s training his my mom).
I have a good career earning almost a million monthly with side gigs that keeps me liquid (meeting all my family’s basic needs). Monthly upkeep of 200k mainly for feeding while I pay utilities and still bring out cash (no fixed amount) from time to time. Presently am setting up a firm for contracting and consultancy.
My wife is a caterer (she loves cooking and baking) whom I have supported over the years. She has gotten much better and I have invested in her business. Presently she has all the basic requirements for her work and she works from home. We live in a 4 bed and converted one to her studio (fully furnished - AC tables shelves etc).
Over the years I have encouraged her to focus on entrepreneurship. This will give her total control of her time. This way the kids get her attention while she handles business which I hope to one day retire into. I make sure she doesn’t contribute her personal funds to the home as I advise her to save for rain days. I have encouraged her to work closely with my dad to earn experience as they share same profession hopefully take over the firm in time while I groom mine for which she is the major shareholder (I’m not even a shareholder).
Overall, do not look for a 9-5 like me, let’s grow a business.
However, she applies for jobs here and there. Just this morning she woke up as early as 4:30am applying for a customer service position and had to wake me up to correct her cover note.
At this point I feel like giving up on her. I feel she just wants to have a paying Job for whatever reason. But I know know the downsides; no time for the kids, 40-80% of income goes on expenses, work stress, regrets - now you can’t quit because you have to prove you can do it.
Am I being unreasonable telling her not to work and focus on developing her business skills?
NB: I have never discouraged her in her business rather encouraged/ advised and funded.
Modified: for those insisting I let her be, how do we plan our future if we share separate visions?? When has working ever made anyone rich??
If she gets an IOC opportunity I’ll definitely support tho, but these are not the toes she’s applying for 100k -300k Allow her biko. When she faces the stress for a month or 2 for minimal pay, she go get brain reset. By the time she removes tp and other expenses, dem no dey tell person. 1 Like |
Politics / Re: El Rufai, Hadiza Bala Usman And Bola Tinubu by ashjay001(m): 5:40am On Jun 20, 2023 |
BABANGBALI: El Rufai, Hadiza Bala Usman and Bola Tinubu
El-Rufai appointed Hadiza Bala Usman as his SA when he was Minister of FCT under OBJ. He brought along when he became governor as his SA. El Rufai then pushed the woman to Buhari to be appointed as Managing Director of Nigeria Ports Authority. Hadiza Bala Usman has zero academic and professional experience in port management or administration, zero senior management experience, zero experience in managing any cooperate entity: These does not matter to Buhari and El- Rufai. What they cared about are: tribe, religion and personal relationships Hadiza Bala Usman as MD of NPA was accused of outstanding unremitted balance of N165 billion (N165, 320, 962, 697) yes you read that right. Over 165 billion naira Hadiza Bala I Usman was suspended as MD of NPA and the then President Buhari set up a ministerial probe panel to investigate her. Note that the EFCC should have been called to investigate the fraud. More than two years after the probe panel was set up, the report has not seen the light of the day. Hadiza was never charged for any fraud. Now El Rufai has pushed the same Hadiza Bala Usman to Aso Rock as Tinubu Special Assistant How a people think they can pray a nation that celebrate and rewards thieves with higher offices into greatness should be a study in madness
Copied Fortunately, she was cleared of fraud. Get your facts right. That you don't rate El Rufai, doesn't mean you should transfer your hatred unto his me tee. She was actually a very good administrator, maybe not experienced enough but a good one and a patriotic Nigerian. https://www.arise.tv/amaechis-panel-clears-hadiza-bala-usman-of-fraud-trending-with-ojy-okpe/ 6 Likes 1 Share |
Religion / Re: The Journey Of Soul by ashjay001(m): 6:14pm On Jun 07, 2023 |
Templee333: hi! are you still available? How is the search now? Same old, same old. Trying to be at peace with myself. 1day at a time |
Family / Re: My Parents Destroyed My Life In Guise Of Love, I'm Now Depressed Daily by ashjay001(m): 9:34pm On Sep 13, 2022 |
Ablemed:
Making friends is not issue, the thing is even you as a person, a boring friend will bore you out that's just how my relationship with my friends are atm, I've got no vibe to maintain a discussion. in short I'll literally bore you out and that's just my case. About work, I bet you any manager will sack me after 2weeks or a month highest, there are some ethics that i'm seriously lacking
Bro I swear you won't and can't understand me You're a very smart guy. Now, can you make the sacrifice to make things work? Pple are worse than you and still get things done?! Like someone suggested, get accommodation. If possible, get with a friend, you can't live alone yet, too depressing, esp as you won't likely gell with the neighbors well. Rent in a rough environment, slum sef. Get any kind of job or apprenticeship. Or, you can even be going to your family shop to work. Make dem employ you. A clean break will not do anyone any favors, that I promise you. It will just make everything worse |
Family / Re: Help! Am I Wrong Asking My Wife To Talk To Her Mum by ashjay001(m): 3:10pm On Aug 29, 2022 |
UncleDaddy2017: My wife recently put to bed our first child. While at the hospital, it's been my wife's godmother who travelled down from another state specifically to be with my wife. Infact, she came straight to the hospital and she has been the one sleeping there with her at night. While I stay with her by day. When am at the hospital to relieve her, she goes to our house to sleep.
My wife's mom and my mom (both live few streets away from ours) do come to the hospital during the day ... So fast forward to yesterday Sunday.
My mother-in-law told my wife she will come after church... Hours after church closed we still didn't see her. Only for her to show up with a big traveling bag. And she knew quite well that my wife's godmother put up at our house.
My house is a one bedroom apartment.
When she came, I asked my wife that now that her mom is here, how will all of us sleep in this house as my wife, our baby and the godmother will sleep in the room, while I stay in the sitting room. She became angry and said they will all stay in the room. But that if I don't want her mom to stay in the house, she will just tell her to go away.
So I told her that the proper thing to do is tell her mom to wait till Wednesday when the godmother lives, then she can come. Besides her house is only few streets away. She can be coming during the day and go back home.
So this night now, the mom has bathed and has gone to stay in the room. The godmother who's now feeling sleepy, had to stay in the living room as she can't go to the room bc her mom is there. Me on the other hand, can't sleep in the living room bc her godmother is in the sitting room.... So I sat at the veranda until 11pm. The cloth I had on was the one I wore since morning. I can't go to the room to change as the mom is there. Neither the living room bc the other woman is there.
My wife later came to me outside and was annoyed that I dont welcome her mother in my house.
Do you think I'm wrong to have told my wife to tell her to wait till Wednesday before she comes?
NB: my mother inlaw and I, live like mother and son until she came yesterday Sunday. Go and stay with a friend till one of them leaves. You too, can come in during the day. The drama dey too much already |
Family / Re: I Messed Up. by ashjay001(m): 8:21pm On Aug 18, 2022 |
Kobojunkie: OP claims his breaking point was when his wife said his wife was responsible. So how does telling your boy or previously revealed to you that his karate skills were only to be used when in fact defending himself, that it is ok to use said skills when he is pushed to his breaking point? Don't you see how that is akin to telling him to do as OP did when he doesn't like what others say to him?
You are actually encouraging the boy to perpetrate violence against those who push his buttons even in a nonviolent way and you don't see how that is not advice given from a place of love but hate?
When and if the boy comes home one day telling you he used the karate skills you bought for him to destroy someone else's child for saying too much, be sure to celebrate him and his accomplishment, not try to blame his mother for what is your foolishness. Brother, I will celebrate him! That's my point to op. How can I go out of my way to be a gentleman, train my son to be a gentleman and a badly brought up individual thinks they can do shit and get away with it? They ride roughshod over you, threaten your mental health, cause like op you, you start questioning your sanity, can even get into depression because of their nonsense behavior! It was exactly for reasons like this, I got him that training and I'll be damned, if he doesn't use it. Some pple, kids or adults, just don't deserve to be humoured 1 Like |
Family / Re: I Messed Up. by ashjay001(m): 7:22pm On Aug 18, 2022 |
Kobojunkie: Wait a second.... are you telling us that you adviced your teenage son to hit others even when there was no violent provocation to begin with?
Seems you don't like your son at all. Read what I wrote again, slowly though. (unreplied*) |
Family / Re: I Messed Up. by ashjay001(m): 6:56pm On Aug 18, 2022 |
Troubledman: I do not support gender violence.
I do not support dometice violence.
I don't even spank kids.
We can and should all be better human beings. Better man up and stop simping. Was having a talk with my teenage son just yesterday. About being a man. I'm divorced from his mom and he's staying with her. He asked me, what should he do, when pple hit him in class, even when he told them he doesn't like it. I asked him, why did I put him in karate classes? He answered to defend himself. So, why are you now allowing pple to hit you unreplied? There're some mad pple that just don't know when to stop. When enough is enough. They see you as a gentleman/simp and then take advantage. Press you to breaking point and turn around and still blame you. Same thing his mom did, though I didn't categorically say that. He's getting to the age, when he will have an enlightening. Dont feel sorry for hitting her. That's the only language they understand, you just need to move on with your life. Things will only get worse, they don't show remorse a bit. I'm sure this will feel very familiar. https://twitter.com/jon_d_doe/status/1559810357295710208?t=efYLxEhr35oFGVMwm8-22Q&s=19 |
Career / Re: Should I Use My Life Savings To Learn Solar Installation? by ashjay001(m): 5:37pm On Apr 08, 2022 |
zenith4biz:
Are you based in kano Based in Abuja but a lot of my projects are in the North. |
Family / Re: I Denied My Wife Food This Night, Are My Right Or Wrong. by ashjay001(m): 8:52am On Mar 31, 2022 |
yinkaOdutuyo:
But am having a conscience like am starving my wife or being wicked. Na so women be. Very entitled beings. Once you act responsible like this, they turn it to work. You go cope nooni, cos she will repeat it. Na their way. Just move in from it, hopefully she will learn from it too |
Foreign Affairs / Re: Ukrainain Soldiers Execute & Shoot The Legs Of Russian Prisoners Of War (Video) by ashjay001(m): 11:15am On Mar 28, 2022 |
Dalil8: It won't be long before these mfs get nuked.
I laugh at those comparing Ukraine with Afghanistan, Syria or Iraq. Ukraine has a quite sizable, NATO trained modern army with enough weaponry. Coupled with Ukraine's massive landmass. Ukraine is Germany and half of France put together.
Plus the terrible weather conditions in Ukraine isn't really helping the Russian troops. Many Russian soldiers have lost their fingers or toes to frostbite.
It took the US over $3 trillion and 20 years to achieve anything meaningful in Afghanistan but just look at what Russia has achieved in just a month in Ukraine. It's impressive. If Russia is winning, why does it still need to nuke them then? You sef reason am, not just talking |
Foreign Affairs / Re: Russian Tank Regiment Commander Kills Himself Over Unserviceable Vehicles by ashjay001(m): 7:50am On Mar 27, 2022 |
Built2last: If you have any inch of brain cell left in you, never believe anything published by western media.
Don't forget, propaganda is part of war.
Don't fall into that negative cognitive entrapment of the war being painted. Dey there dey whine yourself. If after a month, Russia has not progressed nor succeeded in even the most basic of indices, do you need the western media to tell you Russia has failed? The comedian has outwitted Putin! |
Family / Re: My Son's Behavior Is Getting Out Of Hand by ashjay001(m): 1:20pm On Mar 26, 2022 |
klassyguy:
I see nothing wrong in buying a game console for my kids. Besides he only plays train simulators, overcooked, and lego jurassic world. And they know they only get to play it on weekends for a few hours, which they adhere to. So the PS5 is not the issue. He's bored in class. Expose him to a more higher/difficult curriculum. |
Romance / Re: I Told My Girlfriend That I Am Getting Married & She Burst Into Tears by ashjay001(m): 8:22am On Mar 25, 2022 |
funshint: Why didn't you just tell her point blank since you noticed all these but you chose to lead her on. Don't worry you'll meet your match. Just pray the one you're about to marry isn't pretending to you. I hate users Users how? Have tried breaking up with a toxic partner? They refuse to leave and always believe you can be manipulated into changing your mind! Still doesn't stop his fiancee from being a pretender or a witch |
Foreign Affairs / Re: Russia Claims To Use A Hypersonic Missile In Attack On Arms Depot In Ukraine. by ashjay001(m): 12:27pm On Mar 20, 2022 |
KingOfAmebo: The Russians have fired a Missile the United States are still budgeting to research, The Russians are just testing their microphone on the kind of badass advanced weapons they have in stock...the other day it was a "misterious bomb" and now a hypersonic missile...
Little wonder, America the self acclaimed "World Police" cannot arrest Russia...The West are really scared of engaging Russia in a battle. Broke assed Russia? Make we hear 1 Like |
Romance / Re: I Regret Being A Kind, Naive And Nice Guy by ashjay001(m): 11:07am On Mar 01, 2022 |
Wallteck: For been naive, nice and kind. I have being a victim of bully because I can't defend myself. Have lose a lot of respect. I wish God can recreate me to be a tough guy. Have been call fool for my behaviour.
I just wish people can understand. This world we live people are just too ruthless. The moment they see a weak guy they will start using and riding him anyhow. If I decide to change my ways I swear I will be so Wicked to the extent I won't have love for humanity.
Right now, I don't make friends too much because I know my weakness. I just want to be a lonely and marry a lady who understands me. People are just too Wicked.
Respect to those tough guys out there. I will make sure all my child not suffer the same faith I suffer. People are just too wicked. She will pretend to understand you until you marry her, then show you pepper 29 Likes 3 Shares |
Celebrities / Re: The Man For the Job: Temi Odetola Lands Second Movie Role (Photos) by ashjay001(m): 10:09am On Feb 06, 2022 |
Antoeni: You Give Her Money, She Cheats Because of Sex, You Give Her Sex, She Cheats Because of Money. What Does This Gender Need Exactly? You give him sex and money, he cheats because of attention. You give him sex, money and attention, he still cheats, just because 1 Like |
Career / Re: Should I Use My Life Savings To Learn Solar Installation? by ashjay001(m): 11:20pm On Jan 25, 2022 |
Alfa123: Am based in d north am interested Where in the north are you? Do you have an engineering/science background? I doesn't matter though. I'm currently in the north, hoping to round up by weekend. |
Romance / Re: I'm Deeply In Love With Him But He's Not Divorced Yet! by ashjay001(m): 3:05am On Jan 25, 2022 |
Rita005:
Note: He said he has talked about divorce with his wife but she's refusing it. This is where my concerns come in. Now, I'm scared of going into a relationship with him knowing that he's not divorced yet.
To be honest, I can hardly concentrate these days because the thought of this guy has occupied my mind. Can I go ahead with him or the implications would be overwhelming? To be honest, I've not met a guy has coolheaded and admirable as this guy but I'm scared. please I need advice on how to handle this situation.
Thanks 1. You divorce, when you want to divorce, you don't need permission from anyone. She can let her disapproval known in court, and the court will decide if settlement will work or not. But, one partner must initiate proceedings. 2. You're already using sex as a bargaining chip, for someone you claim to love? For that kind of guy, you Don fail already. 3. He's probably looking for a baby mama 2 Likes 1 Share |
Career / Re: Should I Use My Life Savings To Learn Solar Installation? by ashjay001(m): 2:54am On Jan 25, 2022 |
DantataIsMyGuy: Hello all. I'm a 25year old unemployed graduate. I finished my NYSC last year and i was able to save less than 50k. After spending 6months without any forthcoming job, I've used about 20k out of the money and all I'm left with in this life is 30k. I was introduced to a solar installation class during Nysc and i decided to give it a try.
The registration is about 21k plus transport to the venue will cost me about 30k for the 6months. I was told there would be a certificate after the training, but I'm still a bit skeptical about the course because i don't know how lucrative the skill is, because i once read a nairaland post on how a guy bought his panels and fixed it himself after going through the manuals.
So my question now is, should i invest my life savings on this course? Is it lucrative? Will the certificate matter at all? Can i build a career from it?
I just opened this account to hide my identity. Please lalasticlala help me move this to front page please If you're based in the north, speak hausa and you're trustworthy, I can feed you while teaching you for free. It's free labour for me, though I will tip u. Nothing like hands on training sha and I'm currently on a job. For every diy, we have 100s of non-technical individuals who will pay you to get it done. 2 Likes 1 Share |
Pets / Re: Why Is My Dog Like This? She Has Abandoned Me by ashjay001(m): 12:43pm On Jan 15, 2022 |
Maks27:
Done this bro I am just sad Dash your neighbor and buy another dog. Very simple something. Nothing is important, until you attach importance to it 1 Like |
Travel / Re: Fire Guts New Warri-Itakpe Train (Photo, Video) by ashjay001(m): 9:16am On Jan 12, 2022 |
Brokeloser: Not a single fire extinguisher on sight.Someone remind me how many millions was spent looted on this project. Sai failure. Check the ground outside, there're used fire extinguisher. Probably wasn't enough 1 Like 1 Share |
Family / Re: What You Should Do As A Father, So That Your Kids Don't Love You Any Less by ashjay001(m): 6:08pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
Kingpele: Hahaha ,well am a man with kids ,if u don't want to have problems with your family members try to show real love to your wife and be faithful to her,especially during the early years of your marriage before she start to make her own money or before the kids grow up into Adults,she will be the person promoting you before your kids behind your back, because a woman can never talk ill of the real love of her life ,I travel to village for meetings and community elections for two weeks when I came back i saw that my kids really missed me cos my wife missed me ,out of the blues my second boy said to me u are the best dad in the world, I knew my wife taught him to say that while I was away ,so love your wife and take care of her needs according to your capacity u will have a peaceful life and your kids will love you and take care of you in your old age.. Congrats, like say you marry better wife. Pamper her till kingdom come, witch wife go still dey sabotage your efforts 1 Like |
Family / Re: Having A Male Child by ashjay001(m): 12:00pm On Jan 10, 2022 |
okine4real: Fathers and Mothers. Pls ohh. Myself and my wife, we trying to have a child this year, and we want a Male child. Male Child or nothing else. In fact i just Pray this time it works because trouble FIT dey.
Now my question is, as anybody in the house every tried the method of making love to you wife on the day of her Ovulation and the sex happens to be a Male child?
I have read to much article and the one that got my attention the most was, IF YOU WANT A MALE CHILD, MAKE LOVE TO YOUR WIFE A DAY TO HER OVULATION DAY OR ON HER EXACT OVULATION DAY. Please whom have tired this method and what is the success rate? I nor get money for IVF, so dont tell me say make i go do am ohh, because i heard its not cheap.
Regards
Abeg help save this marriage. Male sperms have a short life, so having sex as close to ovulation as possible gives them the opportunity to fertilize the egg. Female sperms are longer lived and are likely to be around 7days before ovulation sef. Read everything you can on it and do all you can afford to do, one sha go work |
Family / Re: We Caught My 16-Year-Old Brother Smoking In His Room by ashjay001(m): 7:44pm On Jan 08, 2022 |
Guest2008: How Can I Help My Brother Out Of This Mess
Good afternoon nairalanders. As I'm typing this, my mum is not herself and she's been crying since morning because she caught my younger one smoking in his room..
He locked himself in the room for a very long time and my mum decided to go check on him. After a while, he sprayed his room and opened the door.
The room was filled with this hard drug smell, she called me and we decided to check the room even though he denied ever smoking.. We saw a light brown paper that he probably tears from, a nylon containing something like sand and a lighter behind the toilet seat. Despite all this, he still denied it claiming the smell is probably from the next compound. My brother just clocked 16 and he's in SS2..
How can I advise and help him stop because I believe he was actually smoking even though he denied it? Just tell your mom to chill biko. Obama smoked. Elon Musk too and several successful men. Don't ostracize him and thereby make him join the dregs of society |
European Football (EPL, UEFA, La Liga) / Re: Chelsea Vs Tottenham Hotspur EFL Cup (2 - 0) On 5th January 2022 by ashjay001(m): 10:23pm On Jan 05, 2022 |
1 Like |
Politics / Re: Detained Security Guards, Widow Didn’t Deny CP Entry,Lagos Estate Tackles Police by ashjay001(m): 5:30pm On Jan 04, 2022 |
lexy2014:
Bro, u didn't answer my questions:
How and why is it wrong for "mere security men/protesters to delay the head of a law enforcement agency for whatever reasons" in a 3rd world country?
Why are the security men "mere security men"?
Based on what u said above, is it therefore right for "mere security men/protesters to delay the head of a law enforcement agency for whatever reasons" in a first world country? You sef think am na. The official head of policing in lagos state, is being questioned by civilian/private security operatives?! What so difficult to understand about that? No where in the world is that acceptable! 1st world or 5th world |
Politics / Re: Detained Security Guards, Widow Didn’t Deny CP Entry,Lagos Estate Tackles Police by ashjay001(m): 1:24pm On Jan 04, 2022 |
lexy2014:
How and why is it wrong for "mere security men/protesters to delay the head of a law enforcement agency for whatever reasons" in a 3rd world country?
Why are the security men "mere security men"?
Based on what u said above, is it therefore right for "mere security men/protesters to delay the head of a law enforcement agency for whatever reasons" in a first world country? In 1st world countries, such blatant disrespect for rights are not commonplace, though they happen. It happening in a 3rd country shouldn't be a surprise. It is wrong for those security men, to delay the CP for whatever reasons. Using the excuse of giving him directions is stupid, allow him go and at worst, send a detail to monitor him. He over reacted too. Personally, I believe when you start a fight with a knife, don't act victimized or shocked when your victim pulls out a gun! You don't get to dictate |