₦airaland Forum

Greatzeus:
So you think people are insultive because they are half baked graduates. Ain't you been insultive to those who ain't educated to tertiary level In your shredded mind,a graduate won't insult? What has been insultive got to do with being a graduate? Shouldn't it be as a result of their character and level of maturity

I quite agree with your opinion on this but sometimes you see some comments and insult and you wonder if the person can be called a graduate. Your character and behavior should also show that you are educated.

UyaiIncomparabl:
Why should I focus my search on physical attributes which of course are transient and just by walking down the road, I get to see another better definition of what I think is perfect. Just don't be ugly, and be tall. Dark skin preferably.

Lasting attributes will attract and keep me. Thus;
1. Extremely caring. I love a man who adores me.
2. Should be confident. Not opinionated. I'm opinionated and can't bear to have a house of arguments and fights.
3. Should be a listener (An attentive one).
4. Domesticated. Don't just sit there and be forming macho around the house.
5. Hard working, have a great sense of purpose, not docile, understands sarcasm, be willing to accept constructive criticisms, and corrections. Should be willing to sacrifice for oneself and another. Be supportive. I love team work.
6. I detest forgetful men. Should be Honest, truthful and upright in all his deeds even if it means hurting me with the truth. I detest cheats. Loyalty is key.
7. Should be a leader and not bossy. They're two different things.
8. Must be Eloquent (no bleeped up accents), and highly intelligent than me. Being street smart is a PLUS.
9. Shouldn't be religious. Just be upright.
10. Have a life.
11. Don't be CHOLERIC please, I hate them.
12. Be mysterious, like me.
13. I don't want a traditional man.
14. Should be financially stable, not necessarily wealthy. If he's wealthy, fine then.
15. Tolerant. Tolerant. Tolerant. Be calm and collected, I'm very stubborn.
16. Neatness is key. I'm a neat freak and can't bear to have you ruin my sanity.
17. Should be good in bed.

I can go on and on, but these are fair and not demanding, and in return, I'll give you the world.

Hahaha ha believe me sister..... God is yet to create your own kind of man... Maybe in the future.

You are here enjoying your youthfulness by smashing hoe.. Ss. What I won't tolerate is for you to come here tomorrow and start complaining how you married olosho as wife. Remember the same yardstick you are using now to deceive a lady might be the same yardstick that will be used to deceive you when you want to marry. Get ready to eats what you have prepared... Gbam

See sometimes we beat about the bush when it comes to relationships instead of hitting the nail on the head. I was having issues with my lady about how she behaves and handle things. I noticed it continued till I realized that I have to tell her what I wanted. I called her and asked for a listening ears. I asked what she wants from me as a man and let me see if I can offer that according to my abilities, then I told her what I expect her to offer in the relationship. I made it sound and clear to her that if she is okay with what I am bringing to the table and yet she cannot offer me what I want in the relationship then we should go our separate ways. I made her understand that is better not to marry each other than to get married and not happy in the marriage. After all this, she sit up and adjusted drastically with immediate effect. So my brother hit the nail on the head so you know where you stand.

Winning the ucl is not certain for Liverpool. Their best bet is the premier league which is very much on sight. So just lose purposely and focus on winning the premier league.

AntiBrutus:
Oh pls... Na who no know the person in question you go tell this one. His mentioning me was obviously confrontational and he deserves whatever comes to him.

I am uninterested in his opinion, give him all the advice up there. Thank you.

I think both of you started on the wrong foot....thats my opinion though

Lightangel65:
You are weak, what are women worth, nothing, Even my PlayStation is worth more.
Then why do you guys keep clinging to trash, there are better things to do.

Gaming
Movies
Work.

Men, you guys are weak.

Why do you marry, fornicate. Can't you guys just live your lives without sex. You guys are slaves.

Now I know the angle you are viewing from. You are putting the desires or wants of almost 8 billion people in the world in a small box and conclude that we should all have a certain way we accept things. My brother am sorry, the world is too big to be put inside a box by one person. People will sure behave differently even beyond your comprehension. You will be surprised if you know what is going on right now in U.S.A, England, Kenya, Brazil, Congo, Ghana and so on. see..the world is just too big..there is never a certain way for everyone.

Durentt:
Hitherto a first year university student, I'm going to my 1st semester 200 level in the university.
I'm on a 4.11 CGPA after just a year on campus annd have 8 semesters left. I'm 20.
I ardently covet graduating with a 4.57 final cgpa, so I decided to be profusely prudent this semester and cut off superfluous distraction. Would a sexual relationship preclude me from my first class goal? Or not?

At your age it will surely be a distraction. Just focus on studies for now..then maybe in your final year you can decide to enter a relationship that will be fruitful.

ubunja:
stop this thing you're doing
Just stop it.

okay sir, have heard you.

Lightangel65:
I kinda love that she suffered you know. But he shouldn't have married, marriage is disgusting.
Women are not worth having a man. And he is a big idiot for always sleeping with women, he was sleeping with poo. Why can't men just live their lives without women in it.

I think paul answered your question in Corinthians and also advise those of us that cannot hold ourselves to get a wife so we can flee fornication.

ubunja:
didn't pocohantas tell you to stop fighting on her behalf?

I think you are not getting my points. I am not defending her rather putting you on high regard when it comes to both of you insulting each other. Firstly I will approach you any day any time and speak with you to not insult her or let her be even if she choose to insult you. I will just advice you to ignore her. Ofcos you are a man and would put a woman like her at home one day..how do you cope with her if she starts giving you attitude?? I have learnt to deal with women in a more matured ways, and one of it is ignore them if they want to start making trouble with you.

ubunja:
someone please take the phone from this kid.
He's gonna hurt himself.

aaahahahhaa

AntiBrutus:
Oga, use your upper. "Useless" is an adjective...

Unlike guys that say girls love bad guys, I do not think girls just love bad guys. I believe girls stay with bad guys for several reasons, one being fix-him-mentality.

Ubunja, always read and comprehend before quoting. It will save us all your trouble.

Please mind the use of language with him..atleast you can see all he has posted so far just to show that he wasn't insulting you deliberately. Both of you should learn to accept each other's opinion without insult.That is the only way civility will thrive in our society. A friend defines it as "minding your business and seeing how minding your business does not affect other person's business"...this will create a better world for everyone to live in.

ubunja:
It appears mentally you are unsound.

what is the abuse all about na? I thought we are making progress already..then this one..pls explain what I have done wrong, let me correct myself

victorian:
No be by collecting ring sharp sharp, I want my marriage to last biko!
I don't really fancy him , I had terrible migraine thinking about his proposal all through last night and I was so sad .sighs

But nah I will think about it very well first !

Comfort is a criteria to me at this time o! Abeg! Its not like I need a millionaire but the guy must , I mean must be comfortable . Starting from a flat , to maybe duplex . I can come and suffer and wither during marriage at this age . God forbid!
Looking a shadow of my self , later its people like you that will be saying , why my hubby no younger lady , see as I don old just how many years of marriage . abeg!

I don't need it . I'm serious .


When we are done with court marriage , and am settled in his home , he has free Acess any time any day to my vitamins and proteins . is his rights afterwards .

you are so funny

sacramento1212:
vicky vicky vickies

If you sure say that man propose true true, kuku ma collect ring sharp sharp oooo.

Forget matter of 4 bedroom flat or duplex because that shouldn't be a criteria for you at this time. I even forgot sef, shey you are a princess na so it's a welcome development.

But the question now is, after the man do everything finish,will he be allowed to taste all the vitamins anytime he wants it?

Well I like her view on marriage as long as she plays her own part well and knows what she is doing...then am okay by that.

ubunja:
so you agree you don't view it as an insult.

How about you now then respond to Saffi on my behalf and tell her to guard her words?

hmmm I can see you are ready to make peace with Saffi, I wish she was here now to see this. But seriously you might like her if you get to meet her physically instead of this on-line shiit we got ourselves into. Most times what we appear here is not what defines us out there. Some people cannot just cope with negative comments on social media platforms.

ubunja:
and in what world is the statement "go kill yourself an insult?"

if you use such words for me..I might not respond to it as insult. But someone else might see that as an insult and the reply you will get will look as if you throw an hammer on the person's head. Let's learn to be cautious with our words.

victorian:
If I meet such guy and he stays in a miniflat , he has a job . I will tell him we can date for 6months , see how compatible we are , then afterwards head for court marriage , and forestall having kids. At least with 15k or thereabout one is married . Then we can be planning our finances and life gradually together .
And during the 6months , he won't be fucvking me like his life depends on it o! No way , I won't allow such . if he wants sex that badly , every second every day? Then put a ring on it and marry me properly .

That's if he truly does not want to miss me but if he's squatting with friends Biko I Don Japa! If he likes , let him look like Enrique the Spanish musician ! I ain't staying no shit!

I no get body wey man go use enjoy for years , without him doing the needful . heavens forbid. That's why am this fresh . No man will suck all my vitamins and proteins dry and dump me because of love . abeggi!
A guy wanted to try that shit with me , I bounce him off !

I'm not gullible !

Well you are matured and have some experience already. Not all ladies will take this your path though. So you are saying if a guy comes to you now and give you a duration of two years before marriage..that he needs to know you better and see if things will work,you wont agree

victorian:
Its a huge crime ! Its even catastrophic!

Sorry to say , Men are confused beings !

There is enough time for a guy to meet up Meet up in what exactly?

Okay let assume you meet a guy who you deem fit with good potentials and a bright future. If he ask you to be committed to him that he sees a future for you two. will you accept him or dump him and move on? Now bear it in mind that he is not buoyant yet financially and it may take time to come good...are you saying you are not ready to spend that time with him to have with it takes to take you to the alter and wife you.. Note this, not all ladies will meet a man who is already successful.

ubunja:
White Knight, since the time I told you to "read my signature" did you see me say Pocohantas insulted me? You clearly saw Saffi yet now you acting like you just lost your brain. What the hell is wrong with you?

If I was not supposed to respond to Saffi coz she wasn't talking to me then you were not supposed to respond to ZinolyOnlineHeIp because he didn't insult you.

I didn't imply not responding to her but insulting her is what am against. See sometimes we see comments that are insane or abusive but then you just ignore it and move on, or better you can correct the person without insult. You will get married someday and I believe you won't be nagging with your wife she she decides to nag because you offended her.Some of these ladies have faced alot in the hands of guys all because they want to be faithful. So when they now see a guy trying to paint all ladies bad or who***ressss, it pains them and make them flare up to such guys and ready to insult them at any given opportunity.

victorian:
Immediately I read they were dating for almost 9 years , I just hissed.

Who dates a guy for 9 years biko? how much more even a year , without tying the knot .

If he's giving u stories ? My sister move on! Quickly ! Don't waste your time on the morrafucker!

Op op! Op! Bdchange! You and your sister dey make me vex! I swear!

hahha abge don't be annoyed . But seriously you meet a guy and want things to work between you two, is it a crime to give him time to meet up

sacramento1212:
A guy i was close to was involved with 2 ladies at the same time. 1 was an undergraduate while the other was already an OND holder and working with a company.

The same guy made it known to me that he doesn't see marriage happening between him and the undergraduate despite her having very good qualities. His words, "that the undergraduate isn't exposed but very good in domestic activities while the other is exposed but not domesticated" I was close to the undergraduate and called to warn her about the development because she mentioned that there was a guy asking her out but she never gave green light because she's involved with this my guy.

After advising the foolish girl to apply wisdom that her relationship with my guy doesn't have a future, she confronted her lover and told him exactly what i said and i became the subject of discussion. At the end, they settled and continued fuc-king around. Today, after about 7 yrs of relationship, the guy married the one the exposed one and dumped the one i advised.

So sometimes, i don't pity them when issues like that happens.

See you have to pity some of them. I have come across some ladies and I see why guys will always take advantage of them. They are too emotional when it comes to deciding factor in relationship and otherwise. The society also add alot of injuries to their esteem.Some years back a friend was dating this beautiful faithful girl yet has other 5 girls he date and sleeps with. He doesn't bring them around his home which makes this faithful girl to trust him and believe she is the only one. But my surprise is how this girl wouldn't figure out how cunning this guy is, because evidence is there for her to see...yet she can't. So it is hard for a young lady with open heart and ready to love not to fall victim to some guys who have perfected their deceit and taken it to the sky. The matured ones know better and she is hardly deceived.

ubunja:
Fair enough.
She started with this. Directed to OP not me:



I responded to her:





And she exploded with this:

I thought we are talking about pocochantas not Saffi... except you are saying they are same person. Moreover the quotes you pasted now shows you started the attack on her because she wasn't referring to you in her post. So my assertion still stand.

ubunja:
Oh please!!! these chicks say worse things about us. Just read my signature.
Edit:
Here is the full message for your reading pleasure:

hahah I read all through and laughed my ass out...The truth is you have shown me what she wrote about you. Now can you also show me what You wrote about her, because I know most fire always comes with smoke. I will only accept her to be insane if she just attack you for no reason without a cause from you....Haba na you too think about that..

sacramento1212:
And what is it that you have witnessed that has not happened to many out there? Just say you are not comfortable marrying her. If you see more essential qualities in her than the aspect of sex, i believe your story would change.

As long as any other lady you will meet isn't a virgin, a lot may have happened to her because i know your very reason is because of the aspect of Sex and nothing more.

my brother everyone is different so is our desires. If I end up marrying her and I remember somethings that intimately happened between her and my friend. my mind might not be at rest and I might want to use it against her in the future. See, it is better I don't know somethings about a lady I want to marry than me witnessing it first hand and still go ahead to marry her. No body is all saint likewise me. There is alot I can't share here. The bottom line is what is good and acceptable by you might not be good and acceptable by me. Make your choice and let me make mine.

ZinolyOnlineHeIp:
ubunja abeg recommend me good books.. i found the manipulated man interesting

please remove that write up in your signature about pocochantas. Because you did not agree with her opinion should not change what you make of her or her personality. Most times I don't also agree on her opinion but it wont make me see her less or more. Everybody opinion should count. How it matters to our life depends on how will receive it.

TaminaliaCatapa:
This has been worrisome abeg, I don’t like the idea of bringing any gf from Naija come marry, they mess up real bad.

The Naija girls wey dem born abroad sef, they ain’t any way different from foreigners wey go dey tell you to start sharing house chores 50:50 with dem. There is nothing bad if I do those chores in my own volition, but making it a duty for me is a no-no.

Reason why I cant marry white is obvious, the very immediate point I just made up there, some won’t even let you take your kids back to naija coz it’s shîthole

Please, if you are a
1. Naija married man in a foreign land
2. Didn’t marry here in naija but abroad

How did you get married and what type of woman is she.


Please we wanna learn

I don't know how you created this unimaginable ideology in your head about ladies home and abroad. So you chose to believe that there are no good ladies anywhere you reside. Well I want to tell you that you are wrong and can get a good lady if you place yourself in the position to meet a good lady in abroad or here in naija.

daisy004:
I think the girl let the guy your friend get too comfortable in the relationship
As a lady you should never make it your duty to do house chores for your boyfriend, you can always help out but it should not be an everyday affair.secondly
Secondly cohabiting with a guy makes him relax in the relationship he wouldn't want to put a ring on your finger after all he is getting all the benefits of a married man.so why marry at all?

Thirdly the fact that you are dating a particular guy doesn't mean u should not have a social life
learn to live outside your relationship.
learn to be happy without him,meet new people
#my 2cents#

She wasn't cohabiting with the guy because she wants to, but she was having accommodation problem as of then.
And I believe you know that some people are not sociable. Not because they choose to but that is how they live their life.

rex444:
you wished you could have a lady like her and here God has given her to you on a platter, are you waiting for God to call you from heaven and say " Peter kill and eat"?

So after all that I have witnessed you think it will be easy for me to just go to her and marry her.. Haba easy na

DukeofNZ:
sharap deer. dere are more responsible men dan women everywhere

there is no assertion for this. it is just mere speculations. Both gender are guilty of this.

LordKO:
@OP

I don't agree with you. Actually, one who neither knows how to lose honorably nor hasn't conquered self (irrespective of gender), is the one that has a lot to lose in a relationship. Let's use your submission as a case study: Before I go on, I don't hold brief for the guy in the story - he's a typical small-minded man. However, the girl has herself to blame - she's a typical small-minded person too - because she'd have lose honorably had it been she left the very moment the guy betrayed her confidence on him. . . . Trust remains a justified confidence, this is while an aristocrat will neither give trust/expect faithfulness to/from someone that didn't justify confidence reposed on him/her nor reward mediocrity. She didn't leave when she ought to, not because she was literally forgiven, rather because "she'd invested a lot in the relationship" - according to you - and this means she wasn't altruistic in whatever investment she made. Her inability to act conscientiously when needed is what gave her out as a typical small-minded person. One in her stead, who has conquered self, wouldn't have waited and allowed the guy to eat his cake and have it... one who doesn't believe in something will always fall for anything.

One thing with people who operate on principle rather expediency (aristocrats) - those who believe that s/he who comes into equity must come with clean hands - is that as much as they're never detrimental to others, yet, they never use servility to sustain a relationship with a small-minded person. And when they take to volitional slavery to sustain a relationship where and when needed - because it's an ultimate price of love - they do so altruistically, to avoid bitter cry in the end. Because the last thing to expect from any beneficiary of another person(s) volitional slavery - one that accepts such with full happiness - is faithfulness.

hahah you nearly broke my skull with your articulated grammar. But I guess it is easier to speak from the male perspective than the female. The society we live in give the man room to jump from one woman to another striving to get a better woman, but same can't be done by the woman because she has alot to lose if she does that. If a woman comes to nairaland today and say I have left 5 guys in space of 3 years because they are cheat. Believe me, most people here will criticize, chastise and throw all sort of dirty languages on her. abi no be nairaland wey I know again