₦airaland Forum

Rgade:
No no sir. I don’t think you should use Nairaland as a metric, you know the kind of rabble that frequent this place. My own opinion is drawn from Twitter and there’s no negative energy towards ladies in tech at all.
The only negative I can even think of is that ladies in tech are more prone to being patronized by their male counterparts, which might prevent them from getting helpful feedback and constructive criticism.

It's interesting to see that for pages boys in tech have refused to read comments, and only comment on things that support their assumptions on women in tech, based on arguments that are frequent in the romance section of the forum. Imagine a tech thread carrying red pill talk points and the word "simp" and long posts about the military and other trash. Yet they say there's no discrimination, but display it at such an ingrained level so adamantly. A lot can work with tech but are not educated in any form. On Twitter they pretend then come here to express their true inclinations.

The fact that these male users keep looking for evidence of women in tech when it's right in front of them, because they don't want to believe it is possible without trivializing women as incompetent, is enough reason this thread should be closed. The pit level of testosterone oozing from it is booming.

Ridiculous, devalued thread.

Blessedmercy8:
I get to ask this same question too that why do people keep putting up with someone who hits and abuses them at will? Still can't wrap my head around such gullible decision to continuing cohabiting with such a person.

In this man's case I cited, he has asked the woman go on several occasion but she'll stubbornly refuse. Then behave normal na, no way.

The man had thrown her things and locked her out, she will still bring the things in and force her way in again. Tufia!

Lol.. .

But you are the one prescribing the man flogs the back of her legs, like she's an animal. Then you're here asking why anyone would put up with that.

Mindlog:
Impregnating a woman you no longer want in your life, does that make sense to you? If he fathers their child, he will continue to be liinked to her for life through that child.

If you impregnate a woman, you can't force her to carry it to term ....she has the final decision or will you get the police to arrest her when she says she has had a "miscarriage"?

After thoroughly beating her, you bundle her to her family...see mouth, your type would be looking so sober when paraded by the police wearing only boxers.

What did you think you would read from bottom feeders? By their posts you will know the depth of the barrel in which they seep.

oldienavie:
I am sorry OP for what you are experiencing, I can only pray that God will bring peace to your home.

But how do men marry this kind of women ?
Is it because of big boobs or sex blinding them that you will not know what the person you are marrying is capable of ?

1 year is enough to identify these kind of traits, why do men in Nigeria, where women are so plenty and the odds are in favour of the men, yet men still end up marrying these kind of women ?

What is wrong with you men ?

I know women can pretend, but 1 year of dating is more than enough to know if you are marrying a devil or angel....

When men choose to marry SU sisters, it is because of things like this, no matter how bad a SU sister is, her craze cannot be as bad as these retired oloshos running around, dey full churches like COZA, Winners chapel etc....
Once you enter their trap your life is ruined.

It's simple, if you would care to look at his side of the equation: the OP isn't the saint he's portrayed himself to be in his tale. When he's ready to say the truth, you may feel too embarrassed to change your post.

Kobojunkie:
If you were here in the States, your neighbours would probably have called the cops on you, and you would have spent the night in jail. Your story about your wife provoking you would not have mattered because you raised your hand in violence against her, and her retaliation would easily.... The law and society is too lapse as far as violence is concerned in Nigeria.

Anyways, the deed has been done and you both cannot continue as you are. Provided your wife has no intentions of seeing you charged for violating her right as a human being, you both should probably engage a professional marriage counselor asap. Whatever it is that has been eating at you both, you should talk about, and maybe decide from there whether your union is worth keeping or not.

Your mum should also probably leave the environment, so husband and wife can have time alone to marinade on what has finally happened to their marriage as well.

I would also like to add that you can both benefit individually from some mental health counselling if there are anger issues apparent. You make your wife sound like she has anger issues she is dealing with, but since she isn't the one speaking, there isn't a way of really telling. However, for you, don't hesitate to get some anger management counseling for future.

You suggest a marriage counselor for all manner of atrocities. It's your new mantra.

Maybe next time he will come and tell us that he did bad by killing his wife, but that he has a back story to it. Maybe he will get more pampering and feel justified.

"There's always a back story" aka I don't support violence/battery/murder of/against women BUT... Paragraphs about why you support it.

Save your lengthy justification so called troubledman. If your wife had self esteem, you would be in jail by now. Back story indeed.

Raxxye:
So you know for sure that he has an outdoor girlfriend, you know the girlfriend and you also know she sells food!
I hope there are concrete proofs for these allegations!

What else would make a man behave that way? Don't you all advocate polygamy again?

There's only one thing that keeps a man outside, disrespectful and eating foods he claims he doesn't like: cheating. That's all that will make him talk crap at his wife.

99thEnemy:
How about Catholic priests maam?

They made a choice to follow their God. And those are less than 5% the population of men.

meedoLock:
It was during one of the fuel scarcity in GEJ tenure, public vehicles were scarce, I've waited for long at bus stop, a bus eventually stopped in my rear. I was going to hopp in but was stopped by the bus conductor. He in lie allowed another passenger coming behind me to occupy the vacant seat, I was really annoyed and disturbed for the deprivation. I waited for another and was lucky to get one in due time, we moved for just 5 minutes and met this bus (the one that denied me a chance) had lost his break and got spill over some barricade iron. I was amused at the view, many people at the entrance of the door were seriously injured. I could only stand and watch with my wide opened mouth. Ofcourse we live to die sometimes, but death can be very selective at times
We give thanks to our creator

That must've been really amusing to you.

Waste of Apple products. It's not helped in any way. Nigerians and Indians are in the business of open defecation, as it's a pressing matter to them.

BloomingDale:
I deleted it because a lot of African men are not ready for the truth, so I don’t want to put other peoples life at risk. The evidence was left in the man’s throat known as Adam’s apple, because we all know who is forever casting blame and lying on the innocent.

I never saw @bolded that way before. I'm going to explain that one to somebody that has a very prominent Adam's apple.

You're right, though. We can't expect the caliber of men who denigrate women on the forum to have understanding or true intellect. They're just sheep. Sheep in the trenches.

airsaylongcome:
I really wish we could hear from tech sisters as well. I maybe wrong in my earlier opinions but I'd really like to hear from them here.

They really don't want to hear. Otherwise they would've listened from that thread that day. They now claim they have never heard from a tech sis before.

It's only the ghost of Hitler that will save tech bros, because they're a lost cause.

Esseite:
Its still deregulated diesel that would power the generator to charge it or increased electricity tariff to power the charge station..... there is no running from bills, its eternal.. moreover just a battery change of $20,000/200,000miles (N14.2m) is no joke..

Do you think a person who buys a Tesla does all these calculations you're generously doing?

Raxxye:
Forgive him, Dear sis; he didn't mean what he said. It was just anger outburst!
Forgive him,pls!

Yeah, while he goes to buy the food he doesn't eat at home from his outdoor girlfriend.

Nigerian women are coping with a lot. SMH.

[quote author=BloomingDale post=115828088][/quote]

imagrg:
You appear so uncaring!

If you want your marriage to work out, you should better stoop low to your husband's demands and treat him with affection like it was before the kids came.

You seem to have diverted your attention to your kids by recognising their demands and attending to them first before your husband's.
The poor man doesn't want to pick quarrels with you, is the reason why he goes out often.

My Advice is that you pet him like your baby. Give him what he desires. And for goodness sake, dress yourself up in sexy looking clothes to catch his fancy.

Give him the do and the food he craves for and you will see him stay at home often and that glitter would return!

Lol.

The kind of advice on this forum. She should cook twice a day to please him, as his cooking unit. And then open wide for him. And then he'll graciously tell her that she's for cooking and sex only, after doing what he'll never do for her. He's going out because he's cheating and doesn't care.

Your advice is so warped and one-sided. Have you asked what the man is doing for her and should do? Or is marriage only for women? Marriages are destroyed by men with hate and ego. Men need advice and to change.

Kobojunkie:
Stop that nonsense! The man eats moi-moi outside but bullies his wife over the same.On top of that, he speaks down to her telling her she is only for sex and cooking. Don't need to be a rocket scientist to realize this is more than just about beans and moi-moi.

Are you implying she married an old woman-hater?

If you tell women that men will remain contemptuous of them, regardless of how many bills women handle, they will tell you it's about adding value to yourself as a woman to gain his "respect". The thing is: a man who is a misogynist will remain one regardless of how much women do to impress him. Meanwhile he will do nothing except bring out money (when he feels like it), and expect the world from her, things he will never do for her. Get married to normal men, not men that are in constant bitterness and hurt and anger at women.

It's not like she didn't know this about him when dating. This man is much older than she is, if she will share. He would've pretended to be principled, meanwhile he was just desperate for a family.

siofra:
LAST BUT NOT THE LEAST, THEY ARE ON NAIRALAND.

Lol.

This was a good break. So many (m) viewing lol

They haven't remembered their culture that they can never kneel to propose.

Romanoff:
For a woman who is financially stable and is not driven by hunger to settle for anyhow guy, yes, I agree.

It's not only hunger that makes women settle for any kind of man. Women aren't as hungry as portrayed.

A lot of bitter, pained lonely men trying to transfer their failures on this thread. This is research they will hate to accept, but want to force they're assumptions down females throats.

Men are desperate and lonely without women. All their validations revolve around women.

airsaylongcome:
I have some screenshots from those threads and I have purposely left out the monikers so it doesn't seem like I am throwing them under the bus

It's pathetic that these guys actually think females in tech don't know anything. It's almost as if they are angry that the tech cookie has been shared and they can't leave smelly socks on the breakfast table any more.

I don't even believe those posts, because they aren't true to begin with. A lady who couldn't add and subtract was made a ... Because she is a lady. And she survives years like that. Low-grade fantasy.

daylay7:
I was in love with this guy so much that we do everything together. Aside from the fact that we share the same goals, religion put us far from each other. He was a muslim and I, a christian. I loss my virginity to him (we were both naive in that practice anyway). My parents forbid me and we drifted apart but I loved him still.

I met another guy afterward who shares the same belief with me and we got married three years later. Infact, my ex came for the wedding and celebrated me even during the reception( my husband already know his story and was not surprised when he saw him at the wedding).

A year after the birth of my son, I had an official assignment in another location where my ex's sister resided and because I could not complete the assignment that day, I decided to sleep over at her place. But on getting there, I saw my ex sitting in the living room. It was already late as at that time and I couldn't go back or book for a hotel and I decided to chilled out, telling myself that nothing must happen between us that day. My greatest mistake!

The apartment was just 3 bedroom. A master bedroom for the sister, a room for the children and the other for a visitor. Now we are having two visitors who once shared a thing for each other. My ex invited me into the room but I declined telling him I would rather sleep on the floor in the living room or he should bring a matrass for me. He brought the mattress in the visitors room into the living room and we both slept on it. One thing led to another in the middle of the night.... . And it happened! Coincidentally, my husband called at that time. I had to switched off my phone.

When I got back home the next day, I apologized to my husband that I had a flat battery and he didn't say anything but my husband never looked at me the same again. He never quarreled or said anything even after couple of years later. But the way he talks sometimes as if he kws I am hiding a secret from him and he wants me to open up to him. My fear is that if I should open up, I might lose my marriage and my family. What happened between my ex and I was a one time thing. I never went back or saw him again. It has been 10 years now and I am still feeling bad about it especially when he talked about cheating couple.

This feeling is eating me up. I don't know if I should still open up to him or I should forever remain silent about it....

cc: Relationship matters

Fiction.


Are you gay or what? Lol. What won't one read on this forum.

airsaylongcome:
So a lot of people seem agitated about my use of the word "misogyny". The below outlines my use of the word.

I have seen to many threads were makes whine that ladies in tech (in Nigeria at least) got their roles because they are females and not necessarily because they were competent. I have read loads of comments here were people moan about female-focused boot camps and the so-called advantages females get as regards empowering them.

Bratislava, please do you remember the thread(s) that were "trending" on this programming section were prominent monikers were suggesting that females in tech get preferential treatment because they were female

I remember those threads, especially that catalyst thread. The one in which the bias against women in tech was pathetic. The one in which none of my questions were answered—instead I was given the usual dose of "I can't come down to your level, are you a tech bro? Well, I don't have answers to your question, so I'm going to pretend you don't exist and continue to propagate baseless assumptions because that's what we want to chest bump on" from people who seemed so aggrieved that women should be given a chance as much as quota system black male immigrants in foreign countries.

They were asked for how it was preferential treatment and kept coming up with misogyny instead.

The good news is that those fringe views—from people who actually post woman abusing drivel on other threads (I decided to see if they were being impartial and alas they tend towards the worst spectrum of misogyny)—those fringe views can't stop the alleged "preferential treatment" of females.

airsaylongcome:
Come out in their true identity and get roasted? Even here in Nairaland I know how many threads I've been on were females in tech are denigrated. A lot of the guys hint that it's their feminity that got them their tech jobs. That's euphemism for sleeping around. Until the male folks learn to accept that females in tech (whether programming or otherwise) are equally as competent as males, the females will continue to disguise and leave us males to have our testosterone fuelled arguments

If I didn't see that, I would be pretending.

There's a long way to go in the tech community when it comes to the superiority complexes of tech bros and the usual knuckle dragging. All the testosterone is enough to keep many females out of it. The fact that these bros only know what they think—and only want to believe that the thing they're thinking is always and only right—is repelling and unenlightened.

Civilization and development go beyond knowing how to code, yet being deeply backward in thought and sentiment.

TimmyTen:
Most times u can use a person's antecedents to predict his/future actions. Kim is not new to break up. They want to control and decide everything that happens.

Let us guess, you've willfully refused to use the antecedents of Pete at his tender age. If you did, you would know that she's more faithful and into long-term relationships than he can ever be. Your investigation only goes in onedirection .

Unsurprising—seeing as this is the home of your type of assumptions.

Many Nigerians are lenient with rapists, you'll hear stupid things like "body no be firewood, why was she there", so your soldiers are now firewood?

PerfectStranger:
Some people take relationships as a do or die affair. I don’t support violent but most girls love toxic men.

Clearly you DO justify and support them. We know, so no need to go "I don't support xyz, BUT..." Because that "but" already tells anyone reading that you really do.

The day naira land men become sincere in what they support, the better for them. No need to pretend.

bisqit:
baboon show your face. I hear you are ugly.

Keep barking. This is your bone.

Farfalla:
"Wife material".

Lol!

This is the best set of models. They look good.

Adrian98:
This is definitely love because love is wicked. Love is stupid and love is sweet

LMAO

The love they want on this forum.