₦airaland Forum

Beutiful thread.

Like you OP, I actually learn a lot of lessons in films. E.g. learnt forgiveness from Daniella's husband in the series Daniella etc.

But for some reason, I do not like Gwen Arthur's wife. She has this slickness around her.

Arthur was also very fair to Merlin & loved him making his work easier.

He was also a leader who was humble, easy to access/talk to and leads by example.

Still talk to him to find out the motive/reason why

If he has not binded it, he can still amend the acknowlegdement

divalishis: @all
Thank you all for your inputs.

It's not like I feel he has to acknowledge me just Because. Truth is that I am more worried about the motive. Is he beginning to have the mentality of what has She done for me? Or what did She do for me?

Inspite of what I wrote in my first post, things were not bad all the time. We had some pretty good times too and we loved each other.

If we could go two years in time, I'd remedy things. Not to get a mention, But to show him that what is important to him is to me too. Truth is I am proud of what he has achieved. The day he told me about his struggle to finish and the stress of squeezing time against all odds, How he almost missed his flight for the defence and How he felt when he was graded an A, I felt very proud of him.

The work is already submitted, what is done is done.

freakcin: @ OP, simply try to o be the best you can and continue to support him.This is your penance for your past deeds.

Funny thing is that, dude will regret this action of his years from now. There're things we just have to overlook, not for now but for posterity!

My point especially if they get married and he truly loves her

bellong: This your definition is ambiguous... .

However, the OP's definition or understanding may be different .

I get where the OP is coming from.

In school, we acknowlegded those that did not know our project title as far they were/are our friends, boyfriends/girlfriends, roommates, reading partners etc.

The guy should just add her, she has learnt a big lesson.

I am also curious to know why he reconciled with her

bellong: OP,

In an academic thesis, what does "ACKNOWLEDGEMENT" means?

Those who helped you through your school and your friends.

@OP:

Lucky you that he was interested in starting again. However if I were to be the OP, I will try to find out why he did not add my name in the acknowledgement.

Yes, I was not supportive but he should have added me as a new step since I have changed and he is just writing his thesis.

If he does not add it and they get married, each time she sees the thesis, she will feel bad.

If they came back together after his entire program, it is a different kettle of fish.

And if he still insists on not putting your name after you asked him & sort it out; weigh if he has other negatives you can/cannot live with and take a decision

Lastly, if you decide to get married to him, make sure you prove that you have his back and he can count on you before you marry o. I no sabi wear red pant& blackbra advice o.

Goodluck

Traditional wedding is enough in itself however, Christianity & Islam brought about the confusion.

I wanted a trad & change into my gown for reception or do the white joining during reception and my pastor told me that

1. Nobody will join us outside a church

2. You are not the bonafide member of a church witthout their wedding cert

3. You are not allowed to sleep together after trad if you still want to do white wedding.

Basially, most christians do not see court &trad as proper weddings. To them, only white is white. Funny enough, in my church, you cannot do court &white; they recognize court wedding as wedding proper but not holy enough as if God can be limited by space.

I kuku told my pastor that based on point one, open air crusades are invalid

Later did trad & full white

prettyboi1989: A diva z more lyk a bossy chick who can only be pleased by getting wateva she wants no mata d cost. She wunt care if ha actions hurt d other person. Dats d kind of chick guys shud be weary of.

THanks

prettyboi1989: There's always dat perfect guy in som1 u see dat has traits of wat u yearn for in a man. There can only be one. Dats y its gud 2 pray 4 God's guidiance 2 meet dat ryt person.

I was even responding to estyvino

I agree with you

Kanwulia: Amen!

The feminism angle still baffles me though!

There is really none to it

BananaBender: Only after one person dies, can we consider the marriage an achievement?? LMAO!!

You are going to kill me with laugh

Then you die happy!

Lets say at the death bed, old age or death of a spouse.

And there is no feminist angle to this. It is more of individual

Mother Theresa might have been a non feminist but she never considered marriage at any stage an achievement and did not bother with it.

red101: I didn't say that husbands have to "work wonders and fill all void."
I see marriage as a partnership where both husband and wife contribute positively to each others life.

If you see marriage as the above then you will know that a lonely miserable single person has nothing positive to contribute to another person's life.

You cannot give what you do not have

BananaBender: @Bukatyne: You disagree with red101 and in the same breath agreed with Kanwulia.

I just want to ask you guys how many years or months must both parties have this "good" marriage/supporting spouse before they can consider their marriage an achievement.

A Year 1 student has achieved nothing though we all might celebrate with him or her.

A final year student who graduates with flying colours is said to have achieved.

Honesty, marriage should be considered an achievement at a successful end though there are milestones of birth, anniversaries etc.

Becoming a Mrs. is not an achievement; been able to have a beautiful marriage with a supportive spouse is an achievement in one's life at the end (Death)

Funny story

What I find intriguing is that he reported to the police and not depend on praying the woman away

Thank God for victory over the strange woman

red101: it's ok to celebrate your achievement when you find and marry your spouse.
If marriage is not for you, that's also ok.

This is not about me, it is a statement of fact.

Just as you are expecting your husband to work wonders and fill all void, he is also expecting same of you.

@ kanwulia,

Beautiful post including subsequent ones. You saved me a great deal of typing

Kanwulia: Feminists do not see marriage as an achievement.
We only see GOOD MARRIAGES TO SUPPORTIVE HUSBANDS AS AN ACHIEVEMENT!
Big difference.

Marrying a cow IS NOT AN ACHIEVEMENT!

Being single is not an achievement.
Being single, happy and productive in life is an achievement.
Big difference!
Being single and spreading misery all over the world because of depression is not an achievement!

red101: how is it not an achievement if you accomplish your goal to get married? so you are saying that people should not set a goal to get married? Maybe they are lonely and not happy being single so the change of status to having a partner is a cause for celebration.
Divorce parties and ceremonies are on the rise now. you can google it. if it makes you feel any better to see people celebrating singleness and new found freedom.LOL

Marriage is not an achievement

And a miserable single person will be a miserable spouse.

There is the vacuum only God can fill; only you can fill and only a spouse can fill

If a single was not filled vacuum 1 & 2 and expects 3 to fill it all, there will be serious trouble

Slitz: Islam is the most practical religion! this women would give anything just to have a LEGAL husband provide for them..some women would rather have their husbands commit adultery which is a grave sin than let them take a second wife..I do not advocate that everyman takes a second wife as God forbids that it is done if the man fears that he would be unjust! but a sincere heart would acknowledge that there is immense wisdom in the injunctions of God.. "should He who created not know? And He is the Most Kind and Courteous(to his slaves) All Aware(of everything).(Qur67-14)

And it not occur to you that if a man in a polgamous home dies, he leaves more widows behind or are muslim men immune to sudden death?

The moment we all decide to live our personal lives based on what works for us, the better.

There is no major religion in Ngeria against the remarrying of widows if they so desire and find a right spouse. Infact, the Bible advices widows below 60 to remarry because of sex and companionship and as such, there is no medal for them depriving themselves of sex or sewing their va.ginas as it were

I am also wondering what a woman married for 5yrs is doing with 5kids or doing without a source of income or investment.

I just pray that these women especially the younger ones don't turn to terrible mother in laws after living their lives for their kids and are unable to let go.

It is well

Agrika: Please marry this girl jor...age is just a number...at least pay money on top her head first...me I think she is God consolation for you.

17 40 God's consolation?

I hope you don't mind if it is your daughter in this position or God selects consolation prizes?

@OP: you took advantage of a very vulunrable girl

Just send her to school and let her be

If you both are still interested in your love after her first/second year, you can reconsider

Congrats

God bless your home

@OP:

I have never been a fan of huge age difference

Hubby is 4yrs older

And that 4yrs? Like 20 to me

lanrefront1: this omotola and pilot husband story has been so romantized......... the fact is that Ekehinde impregnated an underaged girl, then went ahead and marry her probably because he had to.

As a teenager, omotola must have been good looking, so he thought what the hell....make I just Kuku marry her joor

She had her first child a year after she got married

Beautiful thread here

But OP, I thought a diva is more like a woman who has her acts together or is she the female of the alpha male?

estyvino: Mr perfect right? they don't exist!

Where is Mr. Perfect?

Beautiful writeup

Missy89: So the Americans were transported to their country and are now in full recovery while dead bodies keep piling up on the streets of Liberia and suspected patients are on the run in Nigeria. ignorant citizens are consuming too much salt and running to churches. mediocre comedians are making meaningless jokes while evil entrepreneurs are making fake products. Africa is really a basket case

Begging for drugs like beggars. while doctors are on their heels (incredible!!!)

In few months you will see some fuvktards talking about one imaginary Africans that built empires and started civilizations

LOL! @last paragraph

Or how Africa has the best family system.

The same family system that bred these f.oo.ls

@OP:

A warrant should be issued for their arrest.

Anyone tested negative should be imprisoned
Anyone tested positive killed straight up

unmask: I love the part where obama said

" “We’ve got to let the science guide us and I don’t think all the
information is in on whether this drug is helpful. The Ebola virus,
both currently and in the past, is controllable if you have a strong
public health infrastructure in place."

Beautiful statement by Obama

I cannot understand why we Nigerians think we are entitled to the drug the Americans used their God given brain to develop.

For those saying it is conspiracy, what is stopping Nigeria from developing its own virus, inflict America and sell the antivirus to them?

Why can't we use our God given brain to do something to find the cure or relief for Ebola?

Afterall the lab have given hints even if they might not have given it all. Why can't we progress from there?

Don't be surprised that if a research team is set up and funded, some cursed people will still siphon the funds into their pockets.

Sometimes, I am tempted to think that Africa is cursed and the whites have better brains than we do.

beeevan: Still yet to understand it too.

It is well

aisha2: How will you understand? You are an "Internet wife" Fight oh, it doesnt matter if the man wants you or not you must fight and fight and fight both seen and unseen to keep him and ya home. Blows and STDs are minor, a "home" is what is most important more important than life itself

More powers to their elbows

aisha2: Am sure this was abroad, here the case go turn on her for exposing her husbands "secrets"she will become the bad wife who wont protect and "fight " for her home. She will end up kneeling down and begging the adulterous man.

Na we do ourselves, if we have standards and stick to them rather than excuse pathetic mediocrity no be wetin we go dey face. Shebi she dey beg the man since. Na she dem dey cheat on na she dey beg. Leave matter

If I tell you that I understand what fighting for your home under these circumstances mean, I am a liar

kingthreat: She must have hated him completely to set him on fire. Why will you be married to someone you hate. When you notice your hubby is a paedo, there are better steps that you could take. Why not report him to the authorities or expose his paedophilla?

Keep quiet

@Godmystrenght + damiso,

You guys did justice to the subject matter