₦airaland Forum

Baddo101:
it may not really mean anything if the daughter is at a tender age

that baby there is up to 3, if not more.children these days are wiser.besides your private properties as parents should be kept private.

tpiah2:
your point being?

my point is that it's not appropriate to expose your genitals to young children.if she mistakenly grabs his privates...?

Baddo101:
u mean Father n Daughter? or Old man to an underaged? or Brother to his younger sister??

i mean father and daughter

For me o, it's not but let's have your view.

Aareonakakanfo:
Why won't cultureless,wrapper-tying people try to denigrate a yoruba culture that is unrivalled in its flamboyance and popularity in the whole of Africa. people with no history nor heritage to cling to, people without historical poems or oriki, people with no precious values and virtues to hold on to. you should understand that this is just an exhibition of extremely deep jealousy by people who feel culturally inferior and will do anything to smear their percieved enemy. you look at togo, benin, brazil, trinidad.cuba, haiti, and you keep seeing aso-ebis, geles, and bata drums appearing like nothing else exists with everyone willing to learn the language. People whose culture is the most influential,most-studied sub-saharan culture outside africa and its popularity keeps spreading like a wild fire. Yorubas should know that the abobaku thing is not something to be taken too seriously especially when we know the people fuelling it

your point is made and noted but the 'people' you described is non- existent.i mean that the description you gave does not match any group. as you have your culture, others do have theirs.if you refer to a people as nothing( no matter how aggrieved you are) does that not equal you to such people? we are all equal in the prescence of our maker, irrespective of how superior we feel.let love lead.it's very important please.

prettyangel10:
But on a more serious note, why will a responsible girl agrees to live with a guy without getting married to him or him paying the dowry?

Toh!! shebi 'na open-eye'?

bobbiekrantz:
Highly unnecessary!!

You think so?? Don't you know we are where we are because of the likes of that boy.if we don't examine ourselves and make the necessary changes then there is no need of hoping for a better Nigeria.

I went to the filling station yesterday evening to buy fuel for my gen.While waiting to be attended to, this lovely looking woman drove in with her Honda SUV and asked for 10 liters of fuel which sells for 110 per liter.when the attendant noticed she was not paying attention to the meter, he stopped at 9.02 liters.whatttt? 9.02? my head swole.in the first place everyone knows that the pump is adjusted and this chap did this? the wonan paid 1100 naira and he collected.while attending to me, i politely said" what you did to that woman is very wrong" he pretended not to hear.when it was time to pay him, i made sure we had eye contact and i repeated myself and he gave ne this " abeg ming your business" look.
Since then i've been thinking about it and realised that what we all need is attitudinal change.if that chap eventually assumes any public office in the future he will still exhibit the same corruption in a higher magnitude even if he's under 'holy party'
My ponit is : let's all look inwards and correct our wrong deeds before seeking to crucify our politicians.do you cut corners, give, receive or / and condone bribery/ bribe.do you boycott due process with your 'long leg'?you pay for special center for your children/ ward/sibling to write exams? the list is long but these are the little foxes that spoil the vine! we all ought to check our behaviors and examine how faithful we are in the discharge of our duties in the little offices we handle presently before we attack our corrupt politicians.for if we do our homework well, the next generation of politicians will be better.Cheers.

gidjah:
Sister chidoks, i hope u know CURIOSITY KILLS D CAT?!hahahahah!my hubby na expert Monitor!,she tells me 'even in your dreams ,if u cheat, i will get u'!,can u bet that?

bros na correct babe you marry so.check am naw, why will she not regulary check up on her investments? if you are the stock market type, don't you check the prices everyday even when the dividends don't accrue daily.

5minsmadness:
Ok ,another example, I happened to chance upon my gf's phone messages one day (not something i do, I think reading other people's messages is very immature. I should note however that she doesnt feel the same way about my phone ) and in the course of it I saw a message addressed to her with "You know I'll always love you my darling."

I caught my breath and went through the rest of the conversation. It was neither here nor there but still there were some incriminating words. I saved the guy's number and looked him up through some apps,got his address and place of work etc. I stored the information and waited for her. When she came I cautiously confronted her with the information. She waved it off and said it was her sister who happened to be living with us at the time, that her sister had used her phone to text her boyfriend. I didnt totally accept it but decided to dig deeper. Lo and behold she was right. Her sister's boyfriend came to visit us a few days later and took the girl out. It was the same guy I had dug up his info. My gf doent know I searched him out though and I admonished her to delete such texts in the future.


1st moral of the story: Not all texts are what they seem. ITs better you delete troublesome texts to avoid unnecessary wahala or giving your gf or bf unnecessary bp.

2nd moral; Stop peeping into people's phone. You can give yourself unnecessary heartache when what you think is a flirtatious tryst is simply a misunderstanding or a stubborn or obnoxious but innocent friend.

My take.

thanks for this explaination.i'm loving you already! that was how one silly girl marketting orgango tea( or something like that) nearly put me into trouble with hubby.she took hid number to invite him for a workshop which she dif but after wards started sending suggestive texts as per the peformance of the tea as the tea is capable of doing stuffs to men and expressely suggested he tried her.i went mad .i wasn't as cool as you were.i confronted him before thinking.the guy brought the phone and we studied her words carefully till i just started apologising like a goat.sha that was my early days of snooping.now i'm a professional.i think thrice and view it from different angles before acting.BUT if he had deleted that text, it have caused us the stress.

2chainz:
I'm a student too & i know its not easy being in school if you don't have a sponsor. Really wish i could help in anyway. I believe God will send a helper, just have FATE!!

'FAITH' my dear.

juman:
You think so?

yes naw!

Donbasi:
I absolutely disagree with Op on Number 7, I stay in abj and I haven't visited lag before! Shu! Na that one make my school fees waste? Ok Op school fees and 4 yrs wasted if u don't knw millenium park

he said if you didn't know it's in lagos.you don't necessarily need to be a lagosian before knowing that. the same applies to zuma rock.every body should know where it is situated

**if you cannot type a sentence without informal abbreviation **if all you do in Nairaland is to look for trouble and insult/ abuse people

crackhaus:
The picture denotes a situation where there is evidence of correspondence between both people.

not necessarily, and speaking from a wonan's angle leaving those text messages spells interrogations and explainations.
how will hubby react when a toaster starts with i misd you.to him he hasn't seen you for a while or you've warned him to keep of which had been doing but couldn't resist coming on you again.some even send a text to describe how well your clothes fitted and how it defined your curves.show hubby today, tommorrow and the next day the question will be" are you the only female in that office, if they aren't going after others then there is something that is attracting them to you" you will think it's a joke until you will start answering questions on " who was that?" each time your phone rings or "what does he want" if it happens to be a colleague at work...

Dearie if you can just forget those gifts and face your front.( like you've been adviced)
Do not speak when they are discussing each other not to talk of when the topic is not open for discussion.share your toughts with your husband alone.they will readily forgive him but you? your roots never mature for that .
Overlook a lot of things.don't complain about them to your hubby; it may make him react on them, they in turn will accuse you.once he quarells with them over an issue concerning you, they will accuse you, he will also feel you are making them quarell.na so wahala de start o.

oh such a happy looking lad.may he be found in Jesus name(amen)

I read through all the comments and wondered why some women talk in razz manner.like seriously? your husband baby factory is a public property?? what does that make your own? you accuse decent women of praying & fasting,plus making excuses for their husbands yet you liken their( and your) most private property to a stairway.this is not the will of God o! you people should learn to fear God.don't go about confusing and corrupting young ladies and newly married women
** If you are about to marry or are newly married please disregard most comments here.be humble.a good wife is not the one that jumps out of marriage at the slightest provocation.a good wife is that one that takes the pain , makes the sacrifices to be meek, humble and submissive.my people the kind of beating this 'open-eye' women receive on a daily basis from their husbands and even strangers no get part two..the truth is that if you cannot keep one man, you cannot keep the next.
** Op talk to him.let him know you feel disappointed.he's yours , you know how to reach out to him.continue loving him.look inwards too.could there be anything that is capable of putting him off? address such.it may not even be your fault.it could be psychological.the poor man may not have come to terms as to how a head could pass through 'there' .may God grant you the wisdom you need.(amen)

BluStreak:
Can a man ask for a more virtuous wife? God bless you woman and the products of your womb. Abeg buy me oga one bottle of origin. He is a lucky guy for picking right.

Your mama train you wella.

my head is swelling ooooooo.thanks for your blesdings.Honestly , i'm humbled sir, some ladies think i'm weak but when they come out with black eyes ( due to their hubby's 'impartation') i just thank God for my weakness.

5minsmadness:
@bolded, that's totally up to you isn't it?

If the guy has erred before and you decided to forgive him then what are you doing snooping through his phone again? If you can't trust him ever again then why did you make up and get back together with him in the first place?

If you feel you can't'trust' him then its better you pack your bags and leave. Snooping through his phone to see if you will catch him, how long will you do that? A month? a year? ten years into your marriage?

Most people dont know what real love is.

If you love him and feel the need to continue monitoring him then you dont really love him, rather you chose to stay with him cos there is something else in him you are looking for or that has kept you.

What you should know my friend is that forgiving is easy but the scar is always there.it may fade with time but if you heal naturally, the scar will gradually fade and trust is rebuilt.
pack and leave? mbanu!! biko i love him o.so much so so much.to the extent that i can give up treasures for him.i'm here because i love the guy like kilode! I check his phone to know the latest and he has improved!

I don't live in Nnewi but I am born, bred and buttered in Nnewi.The greatest town ever.i'm so so proud of my of my father's town .m Marriage took me away sha .God dey!

op snap more pics and caption them.mofify the topic.it's living not leaving.if possible capture igwe's palace, the 3 obis' Nkwo Market.Chikason's factory,Ibeto's factory etc
let's show Nigerians what they are missing by not living in Nnewi!

5minsmadness:
It's not everything that happens to you that you tell your partner. Some things are irrelevant and will only stir the waters unnecessarily.

It can be also quite irritating for you to be following your spouse all over the place and monitoring his/her every call and text. It's a strong sign of insecurity and you'll most likely drive your spouse further from you rather than draw him or her closer.

Love should be about trust, not about monitoring spirits.

you are on point but on the issue of trust:if the guy had erred before, dont you think the woman will constantly be drawn to the phone or is she not to wonder/ worry about what her husband does.
to me it's always good to check once in a while to know what he's up to.
love is about trust but once that trust is abused total healing and restoration is almost impossible

5minsmadness:
It's not everything u see that you must talk.
Doing so is immaturity.

sorry, i didn't get that.

5minsmadness:
Very false.

any explainations?

[quote author=vouriotp post=36848099][/quote]Dearest men are like that. i don't know why they enjoy dirty chats with women they wouldn't dare stand with in the public.
however the silence treatment is not the best nither is a fight better.
my solution: i suggest you do what i did.. one blessed sunday morning i woke up too early and immediately my mind went to his phone..i snuck to the sitting room to read.oh yes i read all his sms, all his badoo chats and they are really bad and dirty..even his face book chats weren't good.he was flriting like mad and i went cray with jealousy.what God d granted me the grace to control myself.i just started scrubbing the house after i corrected his badoo profile. When his majesty woke up i demanded to speak to him and he sat.i brought his phone and showed him all i saw.oga no talk pim; The guy just kept quiet .after some minutes he got up and went inside .i went mad i followed him to the room and told him how much he hurt me, how no man had never slept with me and i swore unto death if i ever allow another man have sex with me while married to him.i wad broken.i went to church afterwards and was relieved by the word of God.
my tactics paid off. after church he explained he indulged in those chats 'cos he was bored.i fidn't believe him but i didn't argue.he later deactivated his badoo account ..i healed faster than i thought.i even visited his phone this morning.i do it regulary.he doesn't even know because i see things but don't react till i see what will make me to
try talking to him.pretend you believe hie explaination. and keep loving him...and pray too

wisdomiskey:
so yuh r one of doose monitoring
typezz

bros i be chairlady for that club o.it makes me know what he's up to.it has paid off severally! this your "monitoring spirit" is so classic.can't just stop laughing

dptrix:
to safeguard the relationship....

If our parents have showed their sms, chats, pictures etc to each other, they would have all being divorced.

Example: some of ur coworkers send u Sex / flirting sms with nude pix of themselves. In Your right senses should you keep it, "no"... delete the rubbish and call your coworker never to try it.

It ends there, no harm done... your relationship keep moving forward...

yeah people may send raw stuffs to you and expect you to enjoy it because you are supposed to be 'matured'.the wise thing is to de is to delete it instead of having to explain to hubby because no matter how hard you you explain he will keep asking why the person sent it if you hadn't been the usual practice

wisdomiskey:
buh datz wat yuh ladiezz do na
and at d end of the day, na una dey cheat pass

the monitoring ladies hardly cheat.yes we monitor die.infact i monitor on per second basis and it has made me stronger.

wisdomiskey:
i dont even nid 2 show ha anythin
i already kno she checkz
ma fone lyk d monitoring
spirit she iz

no biggie

hahahahahahahaha! but why won't she? you guys are always up to something..lol @ "monitoring spirit"

wisdomiskey:
do yuh honestly expect
peeeple 2 cum here nd admit
if dey r cheating

do you show your partner all the messages you get?my question is how true is the statement?

How true is this:

noooo! the future is most important o!