₦airaland Forum

the truth of the matter is that most young people these days celebrate elaborate weddings rather than sitting back to understand the responsibilities and obligations that come with marriage.when you listen to a couple planning for wedding;all you hear us the cost of venue,cost of wedding gown,cake,food,and other inconsequentual attachments.nobody really sits down to analize their behavioral pattern and how to make adjustments.
back to your question:i watched my mum struggle with the issues that arose in her marriage(one advantage of marrying as a matured person).how she handled rejection,maltreatments and threats of divorce.i judged her ,applauded her,cried with her,blamed her,,pitied her and understood her at times flew by.
I appriciate her right deeds and mistakes,i learnt from her actions and inactions.and resolved to conquer marital obstacles no matter how much i have to stoop.
for me divorce is not a word!
it baffles me when couples threaten each other with divorce at the slightest provocation.the question is : why venture into marriage when you cannot endure the challenges therfrom.you enjoy all benefits from it but cannot withstand the challenges? every coin has two sides and marriage is not an exception.
of course it's not by my might for i my good is insufficient but the grace of God keeps me going even when i feel i'm exploited.
i appriciate marriage and the bliss that comes with it, i love my hubby and i'm a jealous lover .i have caught him cheating, i reacted. yes, i did but i dropped it and focused on praying for him and doing my bit at making him a better man!am i a weak woman?i don't know but all i know is; if i leave and hop unto another man,he will do same.yes all men are categorically the same! thus, i will never expose him to ridicle.he is my lord. God help me i will try to be the best i can be.and to God be the glory he is gradually becoming the man i want him to be without even knowing it...

mine only sweeps when he's in the spirit which is once in a blue moon.the guy sabi sweep sha.he has never cooked in my prescence.not even to boil water.if i pack stew and soup when he's travelling he calls with the wonderful testimony of how he threw them away becsuse they got bad.if i travell, he eats out and wouldn't touch my kitchen.the only time he did dishes was when we had a fight over the phone ( i travelled) i came back to meet him in the kitchen washing ! omo na so i start to dey apologise o because the thing pain am o..

Fixation:
This woman works too! Infact her salary is a little bigger than the husband sef, so she is d one taking care of rent,food,cloths,nepa and the rest outside from the kids skul fees

nna eee is this kind of man real?

lofty900:
do u know how hard it is to bring money home, these women no dey pity person oooo

did you read the story? the woman shoulders more financial responsibilities

Fixation:
According to her.. She has tried every means to ask him to atleast be helping her in home works.. She used seductive styles,normal bedroom talk and fight sef, the man kept saying all that are ladies duty..the duty of a wife and all dat..

my pain is that the man is not fully taking financial responsibility of the home.school fees alone ? no they should rearrange with the man shouldering most of the financial responsibilities mbok

kids first

not guilty

DDeliverer:
IF YOUR MAMA NA WITCH....I SEE NOTHING WRONG IN WHAT UR WIFE DID..

IF UR MAMA NO BE WITCH....THEN UR WIFE IS A WITCH..

BUT BROS O...WHY ARE YOU SURROUNDED BY WITCHES? OLD WITCH..YOUNG WITCH..WHY?

you are the deliverer;abeg deliver them witches.i don laugh tire o

thanks.this is a good reminder.most of us actually started out like this but along the line stress,familiarity and other factors crop up to 'change' us.yeah you got it right! most men will be controlled with gentility but the moment you as much as raise your voice a bit,he sees you as a competitor and brings out the demons in him.little wonder the bible admonishes that wise women build their homes.you advice is divine.thanks again.
** eno dey easy sha but what else can a good woman do...

ToroJah:
yes have always feel like ending it once and for all, the only thing keeping me is the easiest and fastest way to go about it. I know of the sniper and rope approach but I feel it won't be easy and fast as I want. I overhead people talk about pumpkin leave roots as one of the fastest maybe will consider that.
p

of what use is life when even your immediate family desert you, no love nor care, no job, everyone ready to take advantage of your condition. people keep saying pray, for four years now have been praying no difference, then i'm force to conclude that He's a partial God, since I got no one I'm living for I better be dead than live in pain and mockery!

God is all you need to have all your needs met.the only way to access God is through prayers..sincere a genuine prayers.prayers of faith.when praying to God ,you must do it on his terms to see results.what are his terms:
1>you must be born again.you must consciously and genuinely eschew evil and all wrong doing.God loves us but hates sin thus he sacrificed his son to reconnect us to him.His hands are not shortened,his ears are not deafened to our cries,He is not partial but sin frustrates His efforts at helping us.genuine repentance,and death to sin clears the ways for his blessings to stream in.praying now to commit sins later weakens and renders the prayers ineffective.
*at repentance you find peace.Christ comes in,all mountains are levelled by his blood and every valley is filled.
2>At this point you have the right to pray.the blood of Jesus Christ cleanses the path.you can even worship God with songs a start pleading the blood of Christ.it works wonders.it has worked for me severally.plead the blood against all adversities of life.mix prayers with faith and see God work wonders
3>Marry your bible.search the scriptures.everything pertaining life is addressed in the bible.the word of God will comfort and give you solace.
4>Confront your issues.the word of God willl assist you here.what is that issue bugging you?speak to it.let it know that you are greater than it.is it rejection,unemployment,death of a loved one,poverty,sickness...whatever it is speak to it every day.tell it that you are more than it..then seek help.if unemployed; get up,go out there,package your CV.distribute with a smile and all confidence then find something doing no matter how meaner like labour.i once worked as a steward in a hotel.there is dignity in labour.you can serve at an eatry for the mean time.once God sees your committement He presents a bigger thing to you
*if you are mocked or rejected;face your front.you don't need any man's approval or discouragement to live.get busy with your hands and brain,make sure you are exhausted from work everyday and i bet you would not have the time to think of people...
May God bless,keep and see you through.amen!
**Make sure you stay strong a lot of destinies are tied to yours

1,3,15,17,29,31,32,42,48-50,52. most importantly 3! blank cheque?i will so love him...

17 th february...

Seun:
We are not rich. Though we have many natural resources, we also have a really large population so there's not enough to go around. Countries with very large populations cannot become rich just by exploiting natural resources. We must increase our productivity massively.

good point.human capital developement is lacking over here.this is where education comes in .by education u nean formal and informal education .the government should bring back our technical schools.they should out number the grammer schools.let skill acquisation be the in thing.
our youths shoukd also be re-oriented.they must realize that you cannot makecit in life by betting.100 naira can never,will never and must never fetch 1000000 naira.it is preposterous.the government should do thw next generation the favour of banning those football betting centers.it is a corruption.let no man dash anybody money.let every kobo in your pocket be earned.we need attitudinal change all of us especiakly the youths.come to akwa ibom nobody is ready to work.they wouldn't go to school.they wouln't settle down to learn a trade.i'm sorry i mentioned a place but i have never seen such laxity before.yes hausas' beg, but the ones that are not ready to beg do business or work .while here, only few work and the rest indulge in 'sharp practices' , intimidations, and petty thievery for survival. (sorry i deviated a bit).the koko be say we all , the govetnment the citizens need serious attitudinal change. ka Chineke mezie okwu!

chibic:
so who are the sugar mummies? Are they not married women? Abi married women no dey taste another diick? Some of them even have agents online looking for young men. Lol.

i see those adverts but most of them are fake iniaiated by con men. not that there are no sugar mummies o .but i think they would be discreet about it.does it really make sense for a rich marrird / divorced/widowed woman to post her real picture on the internet looking for lovers whe she could easily br identified by friends/relatives/co-workers/neighbours . i even saw one good/decent looking womans picture on face book and i felt really bad 'cos that is one of the disadvantaged of uploading yourvpictures on the internet;any monkey(exuse my language)can lay hold of it for ulterior purposes.

Jorussia:
.please let's us not conclude with this incident that all our police officers are bad.I trust the IGP the officers in this crime will not go unpunished.

all police officrts in this country all bad.moat are corrupt some are demonized but all are bad.running my business i've had 3 encounters with them but justice is akways given to the paying criminal.i have vowed that i will never part with my money to favoyr any police officer.NEVER.i will not befriend them .i shall never even knowingly sut beside them in church God forbid.people thatbwill see the truth but promote and uphold lies.again i say Olorun maje!!

for wetin na?

daey118:
MVP!!!!

meaning pls?

pickabeau1:
Let her open up one more time She should let him know calmly
In addition they can set up a Me time. Anything after 730/8 pm No phones, no tabs etc
Just family time

i like this one

i know that feeling and still need the same advice.mine will not just stop.i srarted frequenting nairaland because of him and his phone..last night i mentioned it again because i prefer him to all the social networks combined.fine, most times he shares with me the stuff he reads but i want to play and talk with him instead joor.
once i held his precious phone in the air ( as high as my arm can carry) and dropped it.the silly phone did not spoil nither did the screen break.i haven't had the liver to repeat the exercise again.maybe i will try it again tonight,at least for me and op's friend...

yorubadelta:
Lol, your friend is crying because of that?
What of all the so called "married" nairalanders that spend all day on this website? imagine how their spouses feel
... technology is slowly killing our social lives and relationships

you are so right

meimoks:
I really feel for your friend but she allowed it, now it's going to be a Herculean task to correct it

how did she allow it please?

[quote author=Jollyjoy post=36185084]sori i forgot you lack comprehensive skill so fvck out.[/quot



shuo!!;

yorubadelta:
Of course na..
But, won't you find it a lil cringe-worthy? uno.. just the mere fact that your parents are under the same roof..
I would definitely feel some way about it just out of reverence for my folks ...

just give it a try and you'll find it fun.you almost feel you are stealing something y'know 'cos you are being discreet about the exercise.i can't fully explain it but there is this silly joy attached to the whole show

They are good with fixing weaves and stuffs likevthat but when it comes tovgrooming thevnatural hair i prefer the females.besides most if them behave like gay.i also hate the way they play with their customers as if they are girls.they even make face( disgusting) just be a bit friendly and they will see you on the road tomorrow and call you 'my friend' not minding you are someone alse's ( what's that?) oh yes they want and engineer body contact.they purposely brush their hands or other body parts against your body( imagine?) and when you successfully draw the line you will see a chick finer than you are breeze in and practically throw herself on him.!

oh dear wahala dey o. but there is hope...
take care of yourself as weight, clothing and make up..if you have added trim.dunlop elite kind of body ris no longer attractive.tease him when you guys arr alone strip to your understuffs and wear high heel shoes and catwalk in front of him.think of silly and crazy stuffs that will make him do the normal thing and pray for God to make your efforts yield the desired fruites.God help you

crackhaus:
I think what you meant to type was normally or matrimonially... because legally, it's now possible in some places.

thanks.in what places please before i embarass myself elsewhere.

Lord have mercy!
may the souls of the departed find rest( amen)
may the rest of them survive this o Lord i beg thee...
i don't even know if i should blame the father for not listening to the son but i've learnt to accomodate advices from folks i'm supposedly wiser than.

pickabeau1:
Really bad..
You mean married women also patronize badoo?

nooooo! i don't think so.it's you men! the bimbos are call girls!

pickabeau1:
You dey mind our resident brainwashed people

Anything white is good..lol

some of them are surprised when u tell them cheating is an english word

37m what?



cc: naijababe edwife kimoni crackhaus Timbuktou coogar Nonso23

the most annoying thing is that we blacks have started copying them in their corruption ( of family life) they came up with homosexuality,indecency,they will soon legalize infidelity.our young gurls aren't helping matters.visit badoo and see married folks advertise themselves alongside demonic half-dressed bimbos and floxies

lomomike:
Motherhood... The love a mother has for her child even when he strays away for long still remains a mystery.

Wait o! Na only mothers, what of fathers some are very closely bonded to their children too!

hahaha! well, being a man you know you wouldn't be tripped with such a 'romantic' night out. a day out with a grandsond may do for the men...

legally, i don't think a man can rape his wife .

freshvine:
Seriously you will fight your husband and make his life miserable because you use your money to save the life of your mother?

How old are you?

darling no need for such questions.read my comments again.i did not advocate for that.what is your take on the issue..in every disagreement there has to be compromise for there to be resolution.i mentioned she was silly and o yes she is.the mothers has been saved and all she is asking for is a refund.let me say it again; she is silly.but then let her husband give her a bit of the total sum in order to placate her.
leave my age out of the discussion.