Yes I have experience in the field. I have enough experience to know that men dilly dally when it comes to checking their reproductive and sexual health even in the face of infertility.
They prefer the wives undergoing all the checkup and no men aren't busiest species on the face of the earth. So that excuse is moot.
Ngwa move along.
5minsmadness: Do you have experience in this field?
I do.
I'm not just whistling dixie. I'm telling you facts. Check out the hypertensives and diabetics and rheumatism and arthritis and occular deficient patients. MEN ALWAYS PRESENT LATER THAN WOMEN. Its not just a fertility thing, its a general health issue.
The bold is the summary. Leave the other long talks
5minsmadness: Still going though the thread. However.
I have been privileged to work in many fertility counselling clinics all over southern nigeria and Kwara.
For the majority of men it is almost an act of War asking them to come for fertility tests. The usual scenario is that the woman comes first and then we insist the tests won't continue until she is accompanied by her husband. Same with HIV screening tests and counselling.
Reason might be traditional i.e men feeling they have nothing wrong with them and that the issue lies with the women . But most times it appears the men just don't have the time to take care f thier own health. They are usually busy at work and only agree to come when the counselling unit sends them a formal or informal invitation. It is the same with most other kinds of illness. Men are poor health seekers while women come to hospital at the sign of the littlest headache.
Most of the factors leading to infertility in women have to do with infection. Long standing pelvic infections, blocked tubes etc etc abound, but usually the main cause stems from infection. And this is relatively easy to treat when caught early.
For the men however, their bad lifestyle habits contribute to poor fertility e.g drinking, smoking, multiple sexual partners, travelling long distances wearing tight pants thus exposing the testes to inhumane conditions etc etc all contribute to making the man more prone to having low spérm count and hence increased risk of infertility.
The interesting thing though is that it is usually easier to treat an infertile man than an infertile woman. But that doesn't mean men shouldn't present themselves to the doctor when there is a case of infertility among the couples. In fact, being the head of the house, he should lead by example and be the first to see the doctor to know if the problem is coming from him.
bukatyne: @Bold: I have never read any Good thing attributed to African culture on NL.
yet we have so many beautiful aspects of African culture that other people find fascinating.
Instead of promoting those, all I see folks do online is use culture to justify all sorts of bad things. Why not condemn bad behavior when found in an individual rather than sweep it under the carpet because 'it's African way' Promiscuity. Anything you can think of is justified with culture. When someone is mean and rude to their younger ones, it is ok because our culture says the elders must be right.
If I wasn't African I may have misgivings about visiting because I'd imagine that it is horrible.
babygirlfl: It does not matter how intelligent a lie sounds. It's still a lie. How can somebody actually believe that Africa never denied women education. We don't need history books to prove that indeed women were denied education because some women who were affected still happen to be alive. Most people have grandmas and Auntys who will tell you that their father denied them education simply because they were women.
anybody that begins a contrary argument against feminism by saying women were never marginalized immediately loses my attention. If your starting line is a lie, the rest is not worth reading. So I Skip and pass.
Imagine o. There's nothing they won't accuse African culture of. As if we are all made up of beasts and apes. I don't know why people like to use culture as an excuse for condoning bad things.
Will heaven fall the day something good is said to happen because it is African culture?
Mumu journalism
Stillfire: Bloody hell! Which African culture condoned and told you to cope with inbreeding and raping one's daughters? All these fake and demonic, I must be a Mrs by force marriage, using culture to hide her own insecurities. Such things are TABOO in African culture. Such a man would have been killed off because he has desecrated the land. Even our forefathers were not this stupid and morally decrepit. What da heck!
All the anti-feminism and gay thread on this section is mostly about Americans.
Funny how they won't sit down to discuss about the paedophilia and violation of girl child rights in their country. smh for the ridiculous old one(I noe mention name ) that left his dear country to live where divorce is prevalent(In their opinion) and sexuality he abhor so much, is legalised.
according to him , the ten- year - old came to visit him but suddenly grabbed him and dragged him into the room from the passage and put his manhood into her private part .
He said Tawa , in an attempt to implicate him, started screaming after some minutes of sexual intercourse and he strangled her .
Hear him : “Tawa (Bilawu) met me at the passage of my house when she came. Then I asked her where she was going and she said that somebody sent her on an errand ; then she dragged me inside my room where she removed my trouser while both of us were on bed, then Tawa Bilawu put my joystick into her private part and started shouting.
Where did this fool keep his brain when he was telling this story?
Idowuogbo: omg!!! I know I loooooove my long nails but, these are a no no for me. Too gothic looking for me. They'll cool if I was going to nail art exhibition tho.
how about same style in another color? It's not the Gothic look that has me going. It's just the art of it.
Truckpusher: The Hausas and Yorubas are the most ungrateful kind of people I have ever seen in my life but a time will come when this nonsense must stop and it must stop with this generation.
If they believe that it was an act of cowardice to keep quiet all this while, then it's high time they better start changing that silly mentality because it will soon bounce.
This is the land of the people y'all love to hate with passion ,but one day just one day we'll end this nonsense either way.
You win and win it all for once and for all.
Shameless people
i've lived in okrika for a year. Their air is not even breathable. There's no 'investing heavily' in that area that will solve the problem. As long as mining of those resources continues.
I feel really bad for them. Polluted water, land and air.
Although they don't even help themselves with all those bunkering activities.
Hello everyone. I must say a big thank you to so many wonderful people on this thread. I started from page 0 to this level and I must say I have learnt a whole lot. I wish I can call every one's name but its not possible. Even people who posted issues here ended up encouraging me as well.
Now straight to my issue (that’s if I have one) I have been married for a little over 3 years. I got married as a virgin and my first full blown sexual experience was on the wedding night (you'll soon understand why I'm explaining all this) in a short while. Hubby was sort of a rookie as well although he had his fair share with girls but he said he wouldnt really have called himself a stud then. He was quite reserved and he claims he probably did it twice, thrice or so (dont really know about that and i don't care about it honestly) Lets just say we both learnt on the marriage bed.
Before then the boyfriend (now hubby) and I did a lot of petting, necking and the whole 9 yard apart from penetration. I liked what we did then and still do. I can say we have an okay sex life but …
I am satisfied sexually but sometimes I notice he comes rather quickly (let's say if we have sex 4 times in a week, he'll come quickly twice) Let me quickly add he makes up with good fo.replay session and he is not a selfish lover. I will be a bit explicit please pardon me here. Most times he makes sure I come (as in o.rgasm) before the penetration itself. However the penetration act is usually short. I don’t really really mind because most times when he makes me cum, I am actually tired at that point. However, I read somewhere a while back that the average sex act (penetration itself) is 5 minutes or so. Then women on that blog went on and on about 6, 7, 10 minutes. Someone said if your man is averaging 2 to 3 minutes that’s an indomie guy!
I swear by God on that day, I was mildly stunned. That was the first time it occurred to me that perhaps just perhaps what I always thought was okay was not. I will say hubby averages 2 to 3 minutes on most occasions. Even though I knew he could be a bit quick at times, I never bothered because he satisfies me nearly ALL THE TIME. Another thing that raised a red flag for me is this - I have never ever had him say he wants a second helping after the first act. I thought this was a bit odd after the first year but I never thought too much of it. Like I say I am generally content with the sex life because it is frequent and he makes me come. He initiates sex nearly all the time and I do sometimes though he beats me hands down.
Please mature women be honest with me. Am I fishing for trouble where there is none? Is this normal sexual behaviour? Could there be something here? I once tried to make him go a second time not because i was starved on that day but to kill my own curiosity. As usual, he was fagged out (after 2 minutes penetration) and I couldn't really care less though I would have wanted it to prove a point and put my mind at ease.
In the over 3 years no second helping so should I be concerned. I'm not a sex freak or anything but I'm beginning to wonder if my man's engine is truly working at full capacity. (where is the sweat pouring out of face icon?)
Please feel free to be brutally honest with me. I opened this moniker for this purpose and I intend to deactivate once I am sated. We are both in our early thirties and we work.
CC: Babyosisi, Bukatyne, Mutter, Efemenaxyz, Thorpido (I really really need the men to talk here) Floodgater, Forexmart and all you wonderful contributors. Thanks
@ colored, exactly.
You're satisfied. He's satisfied. What else are you 'wanting' For him to fit the stories you hear? Some people embellish tales of their lives to suit their fantasies. Don't go comparing yourself and what you have to what you hear.
If you're satisfied and you're sure he is. Drop the matter. Full stop
shaybebaby: The general myth is that men are usually predatory when it comes to sex and simply cannot get enough whilst it's the women who have reduced libido. However speaking to a few friends in relationships/ marriages has revealed that this not necessarily the case. It appears that there are many instances where women are unhappy because their men aren't just giving it up often enough and in some cases not at all. Before anyone cites infidelity on the part of the male, this is not the reason as in those relationships, their men do not philander, always home, make time for their women etc ... Do everything a man is supposed to do apart from wanting intimacy. The usual reasons, they are tired, stressed, not in the mood and the list goes on. Obviously it is not as simplistic in all cases as some men have erectile dysfunction, retarded ejaculation and other medical issues. The bottom line is they are not meeting the sexual needs of their partners and are reluctant to discuss this. So ladies, in an ideal relationship where all is well, how important is sex or the lack of to you? Is it a deal breaker?
yes I'd consider that a deal breaker. Maybe not to the point of divorce, but we would SURELY need to do something about it. I can't imagine having to 'endure' for the rest of my life. Maybe if I was 50 or close to that age and such problem sets in, then of course I may consider enduring it given that at the age I probably won't even have as much drive as I do now. But speaking from a young person's POV, enduring it from now until forever seems like torture. So yes it would be a deal breaker.
Family › Re: Bombshell As Fertility Study In Nigeria Shows Male Infertility Rates Higher by cococandy(f): 9:31pm On Jun 01, 2015
I'll grow by a accepting that some of those guys are too busy to check out their health?
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