₦airaland Forum

This post ended up quite long, but I had to just make the comments.

Some people will never LEARN and they just spew stupidity from their mouth when they talk:

tkb417:
Those not connected are making it
when did you leave Nigeria? have you heard about the emergence of the middle class in Nigeria?
I'm in Nigeria and not a politician and i can stand anybody anywhere in the world. Ive not stolen a kobo and there are thousands of people like me.
Mind you, i havent said ure wrong about people going abroad if they want, but i strongly object to your latter tune
I have friends who work in good coys abroad who would like to join the Nigerian arm of the company . as a matter of fact, they are increasing day in day out

except your defination of success stories in Nigeria means having billions in bank accounts, then ure right. If what i see when i go abroad amongst our fellas abroad is what you call success stories, then you need a trip down to Lagos, PH and Abuja Nigeria to have a feel of our upwardly mobile professionals

uve been abroad for too long
? zero game of survival?
ask the IFC, IBRD, Chevron, Shell, Haliburton, Rencap, vectis  boiz and gurls if they'll swap their jobs for a livin abroad
as for me, its a NO

where you are suits you, where i am is fine by me.
I can claim to be big here, i doubt u can claim a big boi wherever u are

nice submissions tho
just wanna downplay the whole schitzo
no need to attack one another. Na God know where everybody go make am
our models cant be same

Look mister, you make very stupid, convoluted and insane statements because of the blindness of your mind. Let me respond to some of your foolishness, perhaps your vain pride will let you get some understanding:

1. Lagos, Abuja and PH do not constitute the whole country, doofus! Yet you are grandstanding on mere ignorance?? The success of a nation is not measured by their best (strongest of them), but an appraisal of the weakest of them. In any of those places you mentioned, life is ". . .poor, nasty, brutish and short. . .", take this from someone who has lived and worked in Abuja even before you got your pathetic job, lived in Lagos, and visited more parts of Nigeria than your sorry ass. Guess what? There are places over here which you haven't heard about. . .not New York, LA, London, Paris, Toronto,  Madrid. . .but life here is way, way, way, way much better than you will ever know. Believe that people who work here as welders (nothing wrong with that job), they make more money and live a better quality of life than you will ever know. If you make millions from your suffer-head white collar job and you can go to the malls and buy imported goods and flaunt it in the face of your less fortunate neighbor, but can you buy good roads, electricity (not generator killing you with noise and pollution), freedom without harassment from politicians, thugs and robbers, justice and fair hearing (almost 100% of the time), health care that you can bank on (remember your president will not even vouch for his life after spending N2B to import equipment for his personal use, and the list goes on. . .endlessly). This is not in a popular city and this is even for less than average people who can only have an ordinary job. Now, think of people who actually aim very high in their vocations and create the technologies the company you work for sells or markets in Nigeria.

2. Those companies you mention (Chevron, Shell, Haliburton, etc) are only paying you slave wages for all I care. How much do you earn that you think it is representative of everyone in Nigeria? Guess what? In a proper, fair and functioning system, although people will work for these companies you boast about, a lot of people will not. Some will finish their high school, start on a bright idea and make more money you could never dream about. You are talking of a job like you will keep the job forever. . .you must be demented. Look at the worst cases in the villages and smaller towns where real people face serious challenges foisted on them mostly by a system that is designed to limit them from the day they were born. The salary you get per year is what some students will get here on a scholarship in one year and you are flexing muscle? The least privileged person here will still enjoy the roads you cannot, the power you cannot, the peace you cannot, the stability you cannot, better health care than Yaradua can buy for billions in Germany! I am talking about the least privileged in a small town ad your are boasting about a failed system operating in the "best" places in Nigeria?

3. I bet you can never quit or resign this job you worship except you die or are incapacitated, can you? I see your are even talking about the fact that you are a "big boy". . .utter FOOLISHNESS. Look, it is only in failed and failing states like Nigeria that how big you are is important. When you visited somewhere outside Nigeria, did anyone notice your clothes, your jewelery or that you are a big boy? Did you not join a queue, wait for your turn and address even a receptionist with respect and courtesy? If you disagreed with someone, did you just slap them and insist on YOUR way? Look, in a functioning system, a much higher paying job will be resigned and the person goes back to school or quits to take his life in another direction. Can anyone in Nigeria (average Joe the Plumber) resign his job and be confident of his next steps?

luizworld:
@ PHUCK NL  Please imagine this scenario, A person is doing well in Nigeria, he has a good business in nigeria and good qualifications also. he decides to relocate abroad only to find out that things are even worst down there.
I the processs  of hustling to survive he does menial Jobs.
Isn,t he better of in Nigeria where he pays no TAX and Utility bills etc

So, you think tax evasion is a good thing? Shame on YOU! Not paying utility bills? I see you are indeed part of the problem like I insinuated in my previous post. Is that not what the useless government and government houses one of which you live in do? Not paying utility bills? Well, you WILL NEVER FIT IN where normal people do what is right and play by the RULES. Indeed life (and the minds of Nigerians) who think this way is "poor, nasty, short and brutish. . .". In Nigeria, the biggest thieves are the "big boys" and they obey no rules and oppress the unfortunate majority. In a functioning society, there are rules of behavior that do not respect your size, your pathetic job, your family/father's name or how much money you have. Paying taxes is your DUTY and not paying it will land you in serious trouble, so expensive. . .you will rather wish you had paid it ab initio. Come to think about it, you are not being asked for money you did not make as income and they are not asking for your life savings! In a real society, you don't need millions to live decently and the good life Nigerians are dying to find abroad was built and is being maintained by the taxes people pay as well as the taxes that the Utility company you don't wish to pay their bills have paid to the government! Nigeria is a JOKE. . .and it saddens me so much. Nevertheless, I will be in Nigeria soon for the holidays and if anyone wants to have a conversation, I will oblige if we have a chance of accessing each other.

This post is about ILLEGAL IMMIGRANTS so if you are "legal and doing well" like someone said, this topic is not for you. Please create yours and give it whatever title you desire.

@Poster. . .it is a most difficult thing for an illegal immigrant to survive running from the law over here. Unlike Nigeria where anything goes, that is not the case here. If you are illegal, forget about landing a "good" job because the system knows everyone who is legal and your status automatically disqualifies you. But I find it difficult to completely blame the aspiring illegal immigrant. . .as he is only trying to make his life better.

Believe it or not, this problem is created by the so called GOVERNMENT of Nigeria that is totally inept and providing no semblance of true governance. If Nigeria was only 40% of what it is out here (and improving genuinely), very few Nigerians would be interested in living outside the country. In fact, people over here will seek to go back home but since this is far from reality, everyone would rather live Nigeria.

The exception are the thieves in government in Nigeria and curiously, the poster claims to "be in government house". . .so he/she may be part of the problem. There is no one who will leave Nigeria of today as an average Joe with just a regular job and a normal life, visit over here and stay for like a month and would be inclined to go back. Nigerians in Nigeria (indeed Africans) are really suffering, some know it, some deny it, but how many people who have lived in Nigeria all their life can say they have seen anything work very efficiently?? (Electricity, good roads, affordable and good health care like Yara fool spends money buying in Germany, peace, social security, decently paid jobs, good potable water, protection of your rights, freedom, opportunity to dream and aspire to whatever you want, etc). As it is, Nigeria is a joke as a result of the kleptomaniac buffoons parading themselves as leaders.

[quote author=*Hauwa* link=topic=10065.msg4892635#msg4892635 date=1257812943]paining you cuz your belle is too big from beer and you cant ski, eyaaa [/quote]Well, not all NL guys have big belle like you said and I guess you only wanted to introduce some humor, so I won't tackle you! So, as per skiing, well this is not a function of color but where you grew up in and your environment. I have tried skiing and is fun only so much 'cos if you've got no hang of this shit, you gotta wipe-out like a sucker! Sometime, I went skiing with some of my cousins and friends and boy that was some hard body work-out! . If you ain't fit, walahi you no go almost wake-up the next day. . .as the body-aches were brutal. Of course, it is freaking cold also, so you gotta be able to put up with that.

If you are scared of heights, don't try it 'cos you will have to ski off steep snow at top speed as you clear the mounds of snow. Well, after that last encounter, I never get time (even the liver) to try it again! Abeg, where is a soccer ball??

Lots of STUPID comments from women who have LOST (or, in the process of losing) the dating, relationship or marriage game! Life must suck for y'all so bad to come over here and stand logic on its head!

How can your "success" be the "bad" thing that makes men afraid of you? Think about it and see that is really a foolish suggestion to attribute your failed attempts at having a husband / boyfriend to such ridiculousness. As for me (and for most >= "normal" guys) your "success" is only an addition to OUR success (in a relationship) as I am not only successful but have been successful for a long time (before we met). I am NOT OLD so this has got nothing to do with age.

The poster giving "examples" should realize that her examples are not definitive of all possibilities as everyone's life experience is different. If a guy likes/loves you enough, the last thing on his mind is your bank account, material wealth or your so called "success". So, get yourself a real guy otherwise, marry your "success", adopt children and give us a break to deal with more objective viewpoints about issues of life.

Virgins should marry only virgins!

We no want someone who is tainted! Angry Angry Angry

@Platinum,

Hahaha. . .I laugh in SWAHILI. . .seriously? We?? LWKMD

(Memo to: Conference of Nigerian Political Parties (CNPP),Campaign Against Corrupt Leaders (CACOL),Association of Nigerian Professional Bodies, National Association of Nigerian Students, Nigerian Labour Congress).


This is an invitation to you to deploy, together, a nationwide mass demonstration against the corruption, hypocrisy and indifferent leadership that has run Nigeria aground.

The time is right. A sprint of Usain Bolt dimensions is required just to bring Nigeria abreast of where nations of our potential were 10 or 20 years ago, but our leaders are still waving only clichés they have neither intention nor imagination to pursue.

The Rule of law. Vision 20-2020. Seven-point plan. Electoral reform. One of the world’s most advanced. Development. Rebranding.

We know: you and me, that they are all empty. We know because while they spew those banal concepts and insult those who actually pursue work, their own conduct warns us the future is in jeopardy.

What confidence did the Ekiti re-run election teach you?

What are you learning from the trial of James Ibori in Asaba, at the hands of a judge of his own choosing?

What have you learnt from the government’s award of billions in contracts weekly that it conveniently neglects to implement?

What do you make of the current bragging of the People’s Democratic Party that it intends to “win” all non-PDP states over the next couple of years?

What have you learnt from the fact that when our president is ailing, he flees abroad, leaving ordinary Nigerians to die in our local hospitals everyday?

What are you learning from the magic show that passes for politics in PDP-Anambra?

Compatriots: it is all before our eyes: nothing has changed, and the past is our future.

I know you all know this. I have read public petitions, articles and statements authored by you.

It is all well-intentioned, but misplaced. You are showing the glory of the village full moon to Stevie Wonder. The leadership to which you send your messages neither reads nor cares. It is either unchanging, or unchangeable.

My message to you, therefore, is: Stop scratching your heads. Put down the pen. Fifty years of memo-writing has yielded no progress. Let us rise, and seize the history of this nation in our hands.

And I say the time is now because only two weeks ago, our Spectator-Leader, Umaru Yar’Adua, rose to disclaim a federal order issued in his name that, he claimed, violated our constitution.

The man lives. And whatever was the cause, he rose in some defence of his name. This would be a good time to send him an even more important message: a Gani Fawehinmi-inspired scream.

I should know. I have written about Nigeria from teenage to grey hair. I understand now why many that took the same path have surrendered their bylines and retreated: in Nigeria, criticism leads only to starvation. Critics are dismissed as people who have not had a chance at the buffet.

Something else: Nigeria drifts also because our leaders find us easy to manipulate. They prey on our divisions, our vanities, our simplistic hopes that they will look down and see us, Lazarus, dying for a drop of water. They prey on us while we pray. In effect, we drift not because they are strong, but because we permit them the knowledge we are weak.

Think about it: despite the evil governments and the mess they have made of us in the past generation, the authors of our plight remain among our nation’s most powerful today. The monsters they created are responsible for our financial collapse, our political nightmare, our economic doldrums, and our ethical wasteland.

In the past few weeks, notable Nigerians have spoken about where we go from here: Balarabe Musa, Chinua Achebe, Olu Falae, Patrick Utomi. Your organizations too.

Despite this, the federal government still lacks a gear by which true justice is dispensed and everyone is the same before the law. Brazenness and impunity remain the rule. State power is not being used to power the state or defend the weak. As we speak, the laughable House of Reps is pursuing a law that would place its members above the law. The privileged are providing for themselves.

In other words, even if it does seem we can go no lower, we are.

In recent public statements, some of you have spoken eloquently about these. I will not paraphrase you. I will not quote you. I will not even celebrate your sharp turns of phrase or outbursts of oratory until you admit that words and petitions are no longer enough.

That is why I urge you to develop a strategy of taking our collective destiny to the streets—peacefully—to deliver a clear, proactive message to the government about our collapse. In subsequent weeks or months, depending on what your tactics you agree, demonstrators can picket specific institutions or offices and demand justice and accountability. They can merely sit in front of specific buildings and eat guguru and epa for days, until the occupants beg to be allowed to run away.

Compatriots: History assures us there is power in the streets. There is untold power in the readiness of the disadvantaged and the exploited and the weak to walk together and talk together and sing a common song together. On the contrary, there is only weakness where they permit themselves only scared whispering and grumbling and writing in their corners and individual little groups.

Let us, one and all, strip to our most active attire and walk the streets in search of justice. This is particularly important now: halfway from our last false start and the eve of another belt of elections. It is the eve of Nigeria inflicting the ‘Rebrand Nigeria’ buffoonery internationally. It is the eve of Nigeria’s 2010 arrival at the United Nations Security Council to make a case abroad it refuses to make at home. It is the eve of Nigeria trying to convince the world there is nothing wrong in doing nothing to implement the Millennium Development Goals.

And yes, Yar’Adua is currently in Nigeria, not Germany or Saudi Arabia, and reportedly breathing on his own. We must take this opportunity to make an impression on him and the regression he has superintended.

We are tired of whimpering in our little corners, such as your bedroom and this column, and getting nowhere. Let us advance outdoors and scream together, in the streets. You have the organizations that can inspire every Nigerian to join a peaceful demonstration of your definition. Let us announce that Nigerians are no longer content to leave Nigeria to travel unsupervised. We have the power, in peaceful protests, to paralyze in order to energize.

This is in our hands. Let politicians and professionals and trade unionists and students join hands with housewives and teachers and drivers and nurses and journalists and clerks and doctors and drivers and policemen and artisans and lawyers and the unemployed so we can unchain each other, and speak with one irrepressible voice. I will be there.

It is time. Let us seize it and determine the future, or shut up.

• sonala.olumhense@gmail.com

Source: http://www.saharareporters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=4058:a-scream-in-the-streets-the-guardiansonala-olumhense&catid=91:sonala&Itemid=289

Farida Waziri’s Friday afternoon’s visit to New York to give a Big Apple flavour to her job promises to be memorable as she will be met by a protest group.

Following this afternoon’s Saharareporters’ the Chairperson of Nigeria’s Economic and Financial Crimes Commission (EFCC) will speak at the Council on Foreign Relations (CFR), Nigerian groups on both sides of the Atlantic began to mobilize, saying that Mrs. Waziri should not be claiming a battle she has been working hard to frustrate.

In New York, members of the Nigeria Democratic Liberty Forum (NDLF) said they would be on ground at the CFR’s 58 East 68th Street Headquarters to protest her presence. And in London, the Nigeria Liberty Forum (NLF), adjourned to the Internet to mobilize members to organize e-mail and phone protests to CFR officials in New York and Washington DC, urgeing that the event be cancelled

Their e-mail protest was sent to such officials as Richard N. Haas, who is the President of CFR, and Princeton N. Lyman, a former United States Ambassador to Nigeria who is a CFR Adjunct Senior Fellow for Africa Policy Studies.

They said that since assuming leadership of the EFCC, Mrs. Waziri has done more to protect corrupt former government officials than prosecute graft. “She has destroyed any semblance of a war against corruption in Nigeria,” the e-mail said.

“In particular, Mrs. Waziri:

• has shielded the former governor of Delta State, James Ibori, by participating in a sham trial in which Mr. Ibori was allowed to select his lawyers, the commission's prosecutor and the trial judge;
• has fired all the major investigators and prosecutors involved in Ibori's case as well as other former governors;
• received a gift of a huge parcel of land from the former minister of the Federal Capital Territory, Dr. Aliyu Modibbo Umar, to stop investigations of corruption against him; she later transferred the land to her daughter using her paraphernalia of office. You can read these allegations, which she has never denied, at www.saharareporters.com.”

The e-mail also drew attention to her relationship with several corrupt former governors before she was appointed to the EFCC. “Her role was that of a bounty-hunter: to secure bail from the EFCC, for a fee,” the NLF said.

Source: http://www.saharareporters.com/index.php?option=com_content&view=article&id=4043:farida-waziri-at-the-cfr-nigerians-in-new-york-to-protest-her-presence-on-friday-&catid=1:latest-news&Itemid=18

One observation about comments regarding this issue (and many others that relate to governance in Nigeria) can be summarized:

1. Yar'adua's health is his problem, he should quit, Nigeria is bigger than 1 man and he shouldn't hold the whole country down. (Most Nigerians who have seen and live in countries where things run very efficiently with no deference to one individual usually adopt this position)

2. Yar'adua's health is not his fault, it is God that gives health, he is already there though we are not making progress but let us just leave him alone. One day he will be healed and Nigeria can and should wait. After all, the country is making progress, rule of law, re-branding, etc. (Most Nigerians who live in Nigeria and have never seen anything run efficiently adopt this stupid, lackadaisical, physically and mentally lazy position).

My opinion? Yar'adua is playing way way out of his league! His infirmity of the mind and body can only leave him at the mercy of his puppet masters: Ibori, Andoakaa and co. Whether he is sick or not, we are NOT officially aware and even if we were, he his supposed to have resigned a long time ago after stealing himself into a seat he has no clue as to how to run a local government talk less of a country. With no fear of contradiction, this dumbass bottom-sucker of a man will not even rule my street because there are many more competent people. But this joker was the governor of a state in Nigeria. . .not through an meritorious yardstick but parochial reasons?? Only in Nigeria is where you see people praying for everything: electricity, water, good roads, food to eat (when there is fertile land), clothes, money. . .while refusing to use their brains! The church and mosque is full all the time but industry and production centers are dwindling very fast. . .yet people are told to only PRAY!

All the several billions of naira taken as unsecured loans from the banks to do dubious business have since been shipped to the banks in other countries of the world. Yes, that includes your money! The CBN "bails-out" banks (private enterprise) with hundreds of billions (oil money because Nigeria has no other significant source of income) which is most like already being stolen again, yet the struggling man is a mere spectator as their commonwealth is glad-handed to more privileged and richer people! The solution: Just pray to God so they can stop! All the big thieves will congregate in church and mosque shaking the hands of the big pastors and getting photo-ops, but you are told to pray. . .keep praying. . .pray some more!! Nigeria has completely missed it and there's no hope in sight for redemption if our only game plan is to pray for a sick man who should have quit a long time ago.

In other places where a country runs like a country, people choose to fight and die for their country. . .but in Nigeria the ones who have benefited most can install N2Billion equipment for 1 person (and maybe his nuclear family), travel to the ends of the earth running away from death but have built no new hospital for the common people and people are told to keep praying for this man while you cannot afford N20,000 medical treatment for a year? Has it occurred to anyone that even the sickness is a result of how the man has lived his past life and while he enjoyed destroying his bodily organs, he did not remember to even pray for himself or stop? Only in Nigeria this sort of madness can happen!

Kai. . .I no blame this guy. . .I remember I was once in a similar situation. I think my reaction was most drastic as I actually saw the babe at close range and she saw me too. She was all smiling. . . but MEEEENNNNN. . .the WOWO no get part 2! Kia. . .I just close the car trunk, got into my car and drove off instantly! Yeah, I know it could be painful for the lady but the WOWO too much!  

Kudos to the posters who have raised very salient but important observations regarding this phony statement by the imbecilic governor strutting like a cock marked for slaughter speaking through his smelly ass! This sucker called governor is surely full of beans!

1 Billion dollars?? What objective yardstick was employed to arrive at such a figure which is only achievable in his tallest dreams?? How many tourists with their hard currency will visit the domain of this slowpoke after watching the torture video? Roads? Security? And more begging for answers and this fool talks about $1 Billion in revenue? He thinks everyone steals their way into riches?? Mother'effing Joker!

I only wish YarSTUPID could see a video of the celebration that will follow his imminent kicking of the bucket! But alas, the sucker will be stone dead and unable to see that the Turaya leach of a wife and co wouldn't give a rat's behind! As for me. . .I will gladly send him off with curses such that he will be unrecognizable to his brother, evil Abacha when he reaches yonder! In fact, I will hope that the thousands of Nigerians who have died unjustly in Gbaramatu and all over the country under his watch will mess him so badly. . .even his god that he has visited under pretext in Saudi will be unable to recognize the bastard! Shege banza!!

Whales are marine creatures already. . .but what if Noah took small whales easy enough to carry?? They can grow up in time. . .I LIE??

@Mitchelin. . .

I didn't want to re-hash the past in the post hence, I did not add that part of the story. It's not hard to figure out if you have been good to someone and I think I was. . . but you know, it is quite possible that it is interpreted as a right. . . when clearly the particular situation (request) could not be a right. So, at that time. . . she was demanding money to make her hair. . .the money was not an issue as more had been spent on her in the past. However, the "demand" and "its my right" attitude were the problems and I put my foot down, plus she was acting all bitchy and difficult. Then, I walked.

@Posakosa. . .

Well, that part is one that I don't know as I mentioned there are other ladies in my life at the moment. . . with the potential to become more significant. I alluded to that in my original post. One thing I keep thinking about is if I will leave the present trio of ladies (non-Naijas) and all of them are beautiful for her. In fact, I was thinking why is this happening now? Why not a few months ago?? Anyways. . . thanks to all for making a post on this topic.

I ran into my ex-girlfriend a few days ago. Long story, but I will keep it short. After the initial re-acquaintance and the initial "forming". . . we started talking. . .how she had deleted my number and how she was mad. . .yada yada. .

Well, I already kinda put things behind me so I was just having a good time chatting with an old friend. She made a comment on how I was really looking good, etc. . . I ignored the statement. She had said she wanted to leave, etc. . . but she missed her bus three times (I think) and on one occasion, she asked if I will get on the bus with her. . .I said no, I don't have a pass and I will be driving elsewhere shortly. She told the driver to leave and we sat down, again, talked, chatted, took my phone number again (I made sure she typed it in herself), gave me hers and then called the number. She said she won't be calling me. Whatever. It was quite a nice and cordial meeting and trust me. . .(Naija guys too much ). . .I just kinda talked and played with her there.

Next day, I was at a party, she calls me. . .and asked why I hadn't called. . .I told her I am busy and I will talk to her later. Later that day, I called her and talked to her shortly as I was driving home and we ended with have a "good evening", etc. On getting home, she sends me a text about some program on TV, etc. . .before I could respond to the text, she calls me. We talked for a bit and ended the conversation. Next day, she calls (I missed the call the first time as I was not in the room. . .then about half an hour later she calls again. . .I miss that too but called her right back.

In talking, she suggests that she just want to be friends. . .meanwhile she has asked for my Facebook and to talk on Skype. . .and some other things along those lines. Ladies. . .you know yourselves. . . can you decipher this a bit? I think I know what is going on but another opinion is never a bad idea. In the meantime, there are some other ladies under consideration. . .White, Ugandan and Indian but kai, I like our Naija chicks no be small. . .could there be any good reasons to take an ex back?

rubi:
I beg to differ you sound a little bit desperate it turns men off. It is not compulsory that you must be in a relationship if one comes fine if doesn't come fine too.

Have confident in yourself, groom yourself very well and educate yourself. Let him struggle alittle not too much ooooo for your attension

A man who loves you will stay even in your shortcomings but the one who don't love you will always fine fault in you.
It is not whom you love but who loves you.

@Poster. . .this post ^^^^^ is BS. . . the sure way to failure. . .she is propagating the "the loser theorem".

Gabry's suggestion is right on the money. . .but it's your choice.

I am not encouraging the poster to do something illegal but hey, use your brain before you end-up locked-up!

On the other hand. . .the 16-year babe is MOST likely already getting banged by some guy, maybe in her class. . .and them friends share stories of their sexcapades in school after the weekend! I find it funny when the girls being "protected" drop out of school and start pushing baby around in the trolley. . .asking for a "smoke" or a lighter! Seriously. . .who doesn't know that these girls taste the forbidden fruit at about 13! Oops. . .I let the cat out of the bag. . .my BAD!

Emarie. . .

Let's face it: the pickings of ladies who really wish to get married AND stay married are VERY small. Look at the statistics in the US and Canada alone. In fact, I saw a poll not too long ago where a list of 10 "bad" things that happen in the society and the respondents were asked to rank them from the WORST to BAD (more acceptable). I think it was about 10 items which included DIVORCE and other things. Guess what?? It was number 9 on the list. . .meaning it was more acceptable than the 8 other things which I don't remember entirely now but I took note of the majority opinion: DIVORCE is really NO BIG DEAL.

Growing-up in a family and seeing, in my experience, the best husband and wife together (my parents), it is extremely difficult to even contemplate divorce. I am quite certain a lot of Nigerians have similar pleasant experiences in their family. Now, when he finds himself in a society where for just about ANY reason (so far as the wife wants it), a marital disaster (divorce) will inevitably visit his life, do you think he should just write it off as "NOTHING"? How many women make bogus claims just to strip a successful man of everything he has worked hard to have the things and be in the place he is in life? Most Nigerian men (though you may disagree) are not just talented but ambitious and daring. They come over here and in a few short years, they not only get advanced degrees but succeed in their chosen careers or business. Now imagine if you knew that the odds of losing everything in a divorce to a wife (including divorce lawyers), how easily would you wanna put a ring on her finger? Let us even choose to not reckon the notion that some wives wouldn't want their husbands to go back home again, take their kids to visit Nigeria or even mix with the family? (I write these not that I am an old man who has been in this situation but I have close relatives who have lived here for 40+ years, etc). If you could understand this proverb (like my mum used to say), it will summarize: Iku ti o pa oju gba eni, owe n la lo pa fun mi. Interpretation is difficult for me but I like the proverb and I will try: The disaster that killed someone, and you saw it, is only trying to send a fat message?? (Please NL, help straighten this interpretation to a better one accordingly!).

I know that real Nigerian ladies (not gold-digging, fair-weather leeches) BUILD and STAY in their home with their husband and kids. They are not looking to have another person "on the side". These are not the ladies who are only after a man for money (a lot do it, some don't), material things but for the real business for which a marriage is contracted and a family is started. Without generalizing everyone in America, how many ladies are quick to remind you they are "independent", "strong woman", "don't really need a man" or only there when the "going is good"?? Facts don't lie, check the divorce rate. I am in no way implying that it is the fault of the woman. . .we men have our own faults and yes, Nigerian men have lots of faults, ask the ladies . But truth be told, the American society sees marriage as "dispensable". . .after all when the bubble bursts, she knows that a bigger cut of the man's sweat will be given to her. For a man who really has nothing, no plans, no success, he couldn't care one bit. . .but most Nigerian men (and I can generalize on this one, even, just from my circle of Nigerian friends here) are successful and doing well for themselves. . .they wouldn't want to have disaster visit them when they are 40+ or 50+ and then having to start again!

It is terrible though that the guy was not honest with you and resorted to such cowardliness.

ThoniaSlim:
them go just kill you, kno go find work.

LOL

xqwysyte:
Haha, u lot have just been rolling with the wrong girls,

Y'all need to step up your game. Recognize the real ladies. Thats we.

The real money makers not money borrowers.

@xqwsyste. . .how person go pronounce this wey teeth no go "throway" for mouth?? Sha, me I want a real lady, but no, not because of money! So, whatsup real lady?

@Poster. . .


Sure, why not? What is behind this question because with your open-ended question, you probably will get mostly Yes / No answers?

Henrygirl:
I am not a Nigerian woman. I am not African either. I am AA and I really don't feel any right to comment, but I want to anyways. Most of the women in America are women who bring home the bacon and clean the house. Alot of us are educated and independent. In the end, we want what any woman in the world desires in the heart of hearts, a man who loves us and stands by us. Women in America have the careers, houses, cars, etc., but when the day is done, there is no man to go home to. It can be a dismal kind of life. I am a AA with Christian beliefs and I don't have any problem with my man being the MAN in our home. The man in my life is one who understands me and intuitively knows what I need, when I need it. That kind of man, I will follow and call him "Lord and Master" (I do call him that). If he wants me to stay at home, I will. I prefer to have career or own a business to "help" him provide for our home financially. I want him to be able to enjoy the "fruit of his labor" and his family. If he wants me to bring him meals, I will, If he wants me to take a bath with him and wash his back, I will,  I will do whatever he wants me to do. I will even rock his world in the bedroom. I will never embarrass him or degrade him in public or in private because I understand that I will answer to God for dishonoring my husband.  So, AA women are just women, when it all boils down. We are no better than any other woman.

What I will say to Naija women is pray to the Lord and have faith that He will send your man to you. In getting educated, never forget that there is a heavenly Father who wants you to be happy in life. No good thing will He withhold from you, if you truly believe. I will pray for you all. I deeply desire that God brings a good African man to any woman who desires to have one. Know that I will pray for the one who is right for you, one who will honor you like you will honor him. Good luck and God bless you beautiful African ladies. Be blessed and happy.

@Henry. . .

na2day? asked if you have a clone, I say ONE clone is not ENOUGH! I am up here in CA and long lines of REAL men (my buddies) waiting to be "WIFED" to such ladies!  Kai. . .SCARY how a MAN may have achieved (mostly) everything he ever wants but no (REAL) woman left?? Is there a photocopier for churning out CLONES?? 

@Londoner. . .

You agree or disagree?? It think we are making the same exact point on the aging issue.

"one part is not overly-pronounced" . . . I meant that fat white women will usually have a big fat stomach that is struggling to jump out of the tight jeans while the ass is just flight. . .(usually, no hips). . .but a similar fat African woman will (usually) have some nice good ass to balance the stomach, plus usually, some nice hips to even out the scenario.

Another observation, it seems fat white women have stomachs that sag more than African women. I may be wrong but this is what I have seen so far.

@Post. . .

Like any other race. . .some are ugly and some are fine. The only thing you might wanna think about is white people don't age very well. . .mostly. Check out the way their skin looks as soon as they clock late 30's, 40+. . .it seems to sag kind off, marks, folding, etc. However, this is not the case for some other races. . .and even in their 60s. . .absolutely no sagging. But, hey, that will also depend on their genes and of course, their lifestyle as they grew-up.

Also, it seems that fat white women are much much uglier than an equally fat African woman. Fat, sagging tummies in a tight piece of jeans pants spotting a flat ass is just really ugly! Anyone has a contrary opinion? Plus, such fatness is rarely dimensional on the white women, Africans seem to have more uniformity so the effect of the fatness seem to be all round and you have a more even shape, one part is not overly-pronounced.

Why is it that it is killing someone is what comes from Posa all the time? You get serious issues o this woman. . .you seem to forget that when the deed is done and you get carted to jail. . .no NLanders will be there to share in your shame and life time of imprisonment?? Plus, all these insane posts about killing are easily found via a google search and they are actually traceable to a physical address. . .but beware lets you ruin yourself with this vain obsession that may be your waterloo!

countrygrl:
What can I say, I thought that he was a genuine person. But, hey life goes on. Is this how African men choose to see a African American woman as (a green card provider)? Are there any African men that are seriously, truly, honestly interested in African American women?

@Countrygrl. . .well, like you will suspect, there are a LOT of genuine people, Nigerians and Africans, who care about AA women and NOT because of green cards, money or material things. You will just have to find such a person or wait to be found by such a guy! I know people who are just looking for a REAL lady and not looking for a "green card provider"!

Hope you don`t see your girlfriend getting married to someone else on your wedding day!