₦airaland Forum

Sweetnecta:
@Deols; Most nigerian muslims I know, yorubas included [i am a yoruba man] have their wives bear the names of their fathers. My wife bears her father's name. she wanted to make her last name compound though; solely her choice. Her money is hers. And almost all the men I know do house chores, too.

Deols; are you ready for such a husband who will let you bear your father's name and let you keep all your gains and get involve in house chores? I have eligible bachelors, always around me. You may need to write to galadimalou At AOL dot com.

And women can make proposals, too. Khadijah [ra] did.

Actually, I do know there are some Nigerian men who would allow it but not many of them, I believe. I hope some peeps would change their minds after reading this.

Yeah! am ready for such a husband. About the eligible bachelors, am an eligible spinster myself . So u know, theyve got to be some great deal of a man to  woo me . . lol.

I havent got the liver to make proposals o.  that would have been phenomenal

tbaba1234:
Personally, I would insist that my wife keeps her fathers name:: That is more Just!!

thanks brother. This isnt supposed to be difficult especially for pple who have a good understanding of Islam. But unfortunately, many people who are aware of this go ahead either because of ego or because they'r afraid of what pple might say or think, the thought that they are 'not man enough'.

maclatunji:
Who defines logic for you? Try not to let me get to you, it is hate-in-reverse  .

Okay, back to topic. You know that we live in a society that is not fully integrated with Islam. Hence, my wife not bearing my name would not be a problem for me but to her- [b]she would have to explain to my relatives and the society at large why she is not bearing my name. [/b]Personally, I have no problem with Mrs. Maclatunji deciding she wants to keep her father's name.

I think the sensible thing to do is to adopt a compound name Mrs. Myfathersdaughter-Maclatunji would be the best for her I believe. she wouldn't have to answer awkward questions from the society. Barka Jumat!

If that becomes a problem, I think there's something wrong. One of the roles of a man is to be the protector of his family. explaining things to your family should be your duty as regards the above IMO. The society shouldnt be a problem either. Who cares about what the society thinks anyway.

maclatunji:
^ I am not telling 

This your extensive research is getting interesting. Don't worry, I am working on genetically engineering 'your perfect man' in a Lab somewhere. He will be gift-wrapped and delivered to you on your 'X' birthday.     

can you stay on topic please. very obviously, I didnt talk of a 'perfect man' and if you meant that as a joke, I wasn't joking either.

NB. I'd be too ready to ignore any illogical comment from you.

Now, thanks and God bless

The surname issue.

I wonder how many men and especially Yoruba men would allow their wives bear her father's name. It is even supposed to be a non-issue among Muslims since Islam is A WAY OF LIFE. In fact, this definition is most likely the one to prop up when anyone asks you what Islam is. How then hard is it for our brothers o to accept what Allah says in the following verse-

"Call them after their fathers. That is most just in the sight of Allah. . . (suratul Ahzab,33:5)

It is also apparent in the traditions of the prophet that women be called by their fathers' names. Aisha(the wife of the prophet) is known as Aisha, the daughter of Abu bakr. And hafsa as hafsa, the daughter of Umar. Also, Khadijah bnt khuwaylid.

How about living our lives the way of the prophet all the time and not only when it suits us??

Muslim men, any objection to the above??

This is about the issues I have with Naija men. U probably have issues with them too. or are you a man with issues with the women? bring them here.

Many of these are not peculiar to the Muslims. They might in fact have more to do with our culture than religion or in other cases, religion than culture. let me also add that I am not generalising But talking of what I see in a large percentage of them.

lemme start -

^thanks for the compliment bro. how av u bn?

hmmn! thank u for this reminder. about a week ago, I saw the picture of an eight months old baby. the last time I saw her was a few weeks after her birth. She now looks very beautiful and could sit and play . I started to think of how much had happened since I saw her. she'd raised her head, learnt to sit with support, without support, to recognise faces, to smile at people, etc. then, I started to think of what I had achieved in the last six months. It moved me.

may Allah forgive us o! and help us to spend our time well.

Jum'ah karreemah.

can those who attend jum'ah service always tell us what they hear after the service? it would make this thread more beneficial.

^^ wa alaykum salam.

alhamdulillah. how are you too?

*because it is what the almighty wants. Allah says-

"This day have I perfected your religion for you, completed My favor upon you, and have chosen for you Islam as your religion". (Surah Al-Ma'idah 5:3)


*it affords you the honor of an after life of bliss

"Gardens of perpetual bliss – they shall enter them as well as the righteous among their fathers, their spouses and their offspring. And angels shall enter upon them from every gate.”
[Surah al-Rad, 13: 23]

“This is a reminder. Verily, for the righteous is a beautiful place of final return – garden of eternity, whose doors will always be open to them.”
[Surah Saad, 38: 49-50]

“And those who feared their Lord will be led to the Garden in crowds until behold, they arrive there. Its gates will be opened, and its keepers will say, ‘Peace be upon you! Well have you done, so enter it, abiding in it eternally.’”
[Surah Al Zumar, 39: 73]

*by being a Muslim and working righteous deeds, you are saved from hell fire

“(Here is)A parable of the Garden which the righteous are promised. In it are rivers of water, incorruptible; rivers of milk of which the taste never changes; rivers of wine, delicious to those who drink; and rivers of honey, pure and clear. In it there are for them all kinds of fruits and forgiveness from their Lord. Can those in such bliss be compared to such as shall dwell forever in the Fire? Those whom shall be given boiling water to drink, it will be so hot that it cuts up their bowels to pieces.”
[Surah Muhammad, 47:15]

from my lil kowledge of such matters,

a woman is to obey her husband except when he is asking her to do things that are against Islam in which case she gets to disobey him. That he gets angry shouldnt deter her from observing her salaat at the right time. if at all anyone shld be angry, she should be.

^^and that some people use it makes it right?? how old are u sef. simple reasoning is all that takes for G's sake. some of u just keep arguing for arguing sake

Abujabir24:
Salam. Please what is kufr duna kufr? Who indulged the aqeedah of kufr duna kufr? What is the da'awah methodology of kufr duna kufr? And lastly please i want to learn speaking arabic, how do i start? I have memorised the Qur'an so i have the basis, i jst need to be a fluent speaker. Thanks

wa alaykum salam. Your questions are deep mashaALlah. But, it would be better you open a new thread for them as answering them here would mean derailing this thread and people who might be able to answer you would more easily find it out of here.

NB. many of us here are learners like you. In fact, I have a feeling we might be learning so so much from you.   bring them on and discussions might find us disagreeing and agreeing.

zhirinmai:
Salam! I'm new on the forum and I must say it feels very delightful being amongst you guys. I'll also lyk to say that am most happy with this initiative and pray Allah (SWT) rewards you all amply. Ma Salam!

wa alaekum salam. you are welcome 

A graduate should have known not to walk the streets of nija, under the scorching sun so suited. haba!! his own education isnt doing him musch good

pounded yam o jare, if some1 else is making it

^^^ 9ceeeeeee. I likeyyy

1 million. *just passing by*

the internet came too late to Nigerians that the grievances of old took this long to be spoken of #jokes


I really didnt think Yorubas had any problem with Igbos or vice versa until I started seeing tribalist comments on NL. I wonder how much effects such have had on my psyche and that of many others. Even though there's much to learn from history, which in itself is determined by who is telling it, I'd rather want much unsaid.

can we possibly let bygones be? It would save us a lot of stress, I think.

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=879400.msg10295153#msg10295153 date=1330465886]@ deols

thank you but dem go discipline you if you bring in someone like me.
As i pointed out before.

Waka jeje to some nice, safe person abeg.[/quote]you are welcome ma. to d rest, I say hmmmn!!!!

It is a delusion and is annoying. EVen the most uninformed ones think they'r better than you

good.

Many of us in my family wanted my younger sis to go for the sciences. We wanted her to study medicine but she said she wanted to be a journalist.
why? she went for a camping and a career talk was given. She loved the journalist who spoke with them and decided the career she wanted. And you know what, she went into art class. The first exam she wrote in SS1, she got six A's out of nine subjects. We were all happy for her. she is more enthusiastic than ever about what she does and happy at it.

[quote author=tpia@ link=topic=879400.msg10294329#msg10294329 date=1330457125]not the first time someone will say that.


I'll just give my usual reply:

if i even so much as look in that direction, na koboko una/dem go take chase me comot.

Its not my type people are looking for when they say they want converts! [/quote]@bold, the first I prolly dont understand. Who runs after an agbalagba with koboko these days?

and as to d second, I doubt that the mercy of God is for a particular type of people. So, once again, it would be a pleasure . .

it is an appeal. not an insult.

be careful not to interprete things the wrong way. The prophet spoke against pple who attribute what he didnt say to him. I wonder what he'd say to those who interprete the Qur'an the wrong way. Once again, It is only an admonition.

you dont have to agree with me. It is ok that I made my position clear.

it is a tough situation and the husband isnt making it any better. The boy is twenty. if you got married some nine months ago, u'r most probably in ur early/mid twenties. if so, making friends wv him shouldnt be too hard. In fact, that is what you should do. You sure dont want your mother-in-law involved in this. Any action your husband takes on him would backfire and do more harm than good.

it is just what I'd do to a bad neighbour. if friendship wouldnt help, then the silent treatment should.

so Ibori had a thieving history while contesting for governorship in Nigeria?? too bad!

Not allowing a thief in the first place would have prevented all of these, I guess. Anyways, thank God justice is being served

those are just AMAZING!!

What makes him able to whereas you can is simply Kunfayakun.

When Allah desires something, He says to it, BE! and it Is.

^^ you'r now giving your own tafsir. be careful of that pls.

^ it wld be a great pleasure

when would that degree be of importance to him. At that age, I'd rather be spending time wv my loved ones. grands and greats and working so hard for paradise . . .