₦airaland Forum

dollyjoy:
It's improperly abnormal

Why is it abnormal? I believe if my friend dated a girl and later left her! It makes the girl readily available! That's what I think though!


Readily Available!!

HenryDion:
I remember crying daily in bed, wishing he hadn't said that. Just a word can ruin a wonderful day. just a word can cut so deep into the heart like a double double edge sword. People tends to overlook emotions always and I wonder why.

I'm telling you Bro, Emotional abuse is more damaging!

I am presently getting information for my new blog post, and I feel Romance section of Nairaland will go a long way in giving me heads up based on the huge level of diversity in here!

Is it right to date your friend's ex?

If Yes, Why?

If No, Why Not?



www.deedeesblog.com

I see people voicing cases of domestic abuse on the social media, wives being battered by their husbands, even cases of sexual abuse is now everywhere. When people talk of abuse, what comes to mind is the case of battery and physical assault on women.



The truth of the matter is that not all abusive relationship are filled with violence. Just because you have not been punched, beaten, battered or raped doesn’t mean you are not being abused. A lot of people suffer from some other form of abuse known as emotional abuse. This type of abuse is even more dangerous and a slow killer than the pronounced one we see and hear about every day.

In Nigeria unfortunately, we overlook the symptoms. Even the person being abused does not know until the emotional damage has been done.

The ultimate aim of emotional abuse is to kill your confidence. What it does in most cases is to destroy your self-worth and make you think you can never get out of the relationship.

People think physical abuse is usually more terrible than emotional abuse since you end up with physical scars, maybe even in the hospital. The scars from emotional abuse are even more surreal and they are inflicted more deeply than physical abuse. In some instances, emotional abuse can even be more damaging than physical abuse.

People usually say in an intimate relationship, the man is usually the abuser and the lady the victim. The funny thing is man and woman abuse each other in cases of emotional abuse, in fact it can occur between family – mother and child, friends and even relatives.

Emotional abuse involves a consistent model of verbal abuse, hounding and consistent condemnation as well as some more clever tactics like intimidation and exploitation. The abuse is used most times to control and hold back the other party.

In recent polls, and interviews with people, so many do not even realize that they are suffering from emotional abuse until it is late and then there is the psychological effect of whatever actions has been caused by the abuse.

Here are most 10 notable signs of emotional abuse:

1. Regularly pointing out flaws of everything you do

2. Consistent ridicule of your achievements, and your dreams

3. They always make it look like they are always right and you are wrong

4. They always try to control your finances and attempt to control how you spend money as well.

5. Constant chastising and criticizing of your actions

6. Giving of condescending body language to your opinion

7. Always casting blames on you as the originator of their problems and life difficulties

8. They don’t take personal responsibility. They play victim and then blame you rather than take personal responsibility.

9. They disengage or use neglect or abandonment to punish or frighten you.

10. They withhold sex as a way to manipulate and control you.

What is very important to you is to read and understand the signs of emotional abuse. If you recognize it, then you need to get it stopped so as not to destroy what you have taken so long to build. You can also attempt to see a counselor because emotional abuse is as psychological as physical abuse.

For those on the suffering end of emotional abuse, please attempt to consult a counselor as well. Such person(s) will help you deal with the trauma and pain if you eventually decide to leave the already fraught relationship.

Finally, note that an emotional abuser can really change if he/she desires to , only if! Emotional abusers enjoy the psychological advantage they have over their victims and most of them do not intend to turn themselves in as expected.

Emotional abuse breaks to the center of your crucial self, which can create eternal mental scars and disturbing ache.

Voice out if you are being victimized, talk to a professional: let them get you out. If there are no available professionals around you, please SCRAM! Nothing is more precious than your life!

I hope I made some sense, please drop your comments and opinions. It drives us to do better!




Read more at http://deedeesblog.com/2016/06/06/emotional-abuse/#1cGPMCqHy7KLYOmp.99

Secondary Entry!

Where you work
Is where you chop....

My Workshop! The Computer!

This challenge though!

Guess what she was doing?

Hey Guys, been a while!

So I decided to share these shots I took on a boat at CMS

UjSizzle:


You know what, that was rude. So I take back everything I said about wanting you to stay. You can go.

Checked out your blog already! I'm in love with everything about you!....Do you really laugh a lot? You can check me out at www.deedeesblog.com

androsurf:
Am so glad you've came to drop your testimony.

Here's another video i just made for DEEDEESBLOG. Watch below

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TvItAkrbE9s

Fantastic job done androsurf! You are talented no doubt. God bless our hustles Man! Cheers!

Na wa oh!...come and see influx of people.

Where is Victoriousvic and SmoothCHN

EMEKA1MILLION:
My view

This is classic! My love for water!

I call her Electra because she sure electrifies!

#CanonLover!#editedwithsnapseed#iphone6shotit

This was taken last week at the Space Legend Series, at the Oriental Hotels where I went to photoblog! I was mad hungry after standing for 7 hours!

Don't yab the eater of the food. Yab the picture! Lol

Taken with iphone6, edited with snapseed

Hi please can you help review my blog www.deedeesblog.com

I'd appreciate. Thanks

jamilkb:
Thanks for this awesome piece. Check out my blog www.techrogers..com

Would do that right away Sir!

Can someone help me review this blog, www.deedeesblog.com

I need as much reviews as i can get. Thanks

Since I started blogging in January this year, I kept this on my bedroom wall to motivate me as a professional photographer and blogger. I decided to drop it here in the hope that it motivates other new and professional bloggers as well.

If you think that blogs are too long in the short word world of social media, then think again – blogging allows you to share yourself vividly or establish yourself as an expert in a certain topic, says Blogging expert Hana Jay.

Hana has been blogging for 9 years, both for her own online magazines and two other companies. Two years ago, she started teaching courses on how to blog in London under the name “Zero to Blog”. It is a good way to share her knowledge and skills.

Anything is possible for you out of blogging – a fulfilling career, flexible schedule, travelling, collaborations, turning it into a business – anything you really want.

HERE ARE HER TIPS ON HOW TO DO IT RIGHT

1. You don’t ‘NEED’ to be an expert to start with. All you need is to be open to learning something new; you’ll become one. ( I learned photography to become a professional, I hope I become a veteran someday)

2. The key to success is to write regularly. If there is no content, there are no readers. No readers means your blog is dead. It’s that simple and that hard. (This area is not easy men! I struggle with my schedules sometimes LOL! )

3. Write in a way that your readers likes to read, not in the way you like to write. Get in their world – what do they want, need or want to solve ( For me though, I want to solve relationship problems, cover events and blog about it) What about you?

4. Get your domain name. It looks professional and will make your website stand out. ( this cannot be re-emphasized enough)

5. Share about your blog everywhere – not just on social media, but also in person. Give out business cards, make connections, create events or give aways. Engaging with people is the way to grow your name. ( I remember last month, some guest asked me for my business card, and I’m like..business card? Do I need one? LOL)

6. Turn your blog into a career. You need 1000 true fans and a good product or service that goes along with your blog. ( What service/ product are you offering, check your blog again critically. That could be your career)

7. ENJOY IT! Be fearless and unstoppable! These are the three ingredients that will get you whatever you really want from blogging. (This is my favorite part)

I know you would have read about these over and over again! But I just hope this will motivate someone just starting to blog or about to start. Just like it motivated me.

I am a new lifestyle and events blogger, www.deedeesblog.com and I just want to make common sense!

VocalWalls:
I've been to your blog before, and I didn't enjoy it as I did the first time.

You have too many tags, I was too careful while reading, everything seemed like a link to somewhere else.

2. Always proofread, and Ctrl + J, after typing.

Tags? My web designer told me they were key words kind of! Like an SEO thingy!

Was that why you did not enjoy it? Winks?

brianromel:
Nice site bruv.

But I bother that your in a niche that's already over flogged and flooded.

The lifestyle, event and entertainment niche in Nigeria is just over covered by too many people. Making it a lot of work for a blogger to try and catch up with number 1-10 on Google.

You could do a lot of social share, but it will only work were your content is new and exclusive to you, before its then copied by the other thousand and one other blogs that cover the same niche.

But it's brings in the daily traffic, just not the traffic that will click ads.

Still, love the site setup and theme arrangement.

Thanks for your heads up! Well the idea is to get exclusive content though! I sent you a DM already!

Just wanna ask 1 or 2 personal questions. But wait oh! Do I have entertainment niche? I thought I was doing just lifestyle! LOL!

Later on though, when the blog becomes elf-sustaining, I intend to move into photo evangelism! It is capital intensive, so I'm keeping it on a low!

Hi Guys, I must say this is one of the best threads I've seen in this section.

I've definitely learned a lot. Please i'd need a detailed review of this blog as I am a new blogger, www.deedeesblog.com!

I'd appreciate the feedback. Thanks

Hi Guys, please can you help me review this blog? www.deedeesblog.com

The new IG logo is somehow to me, i still prefer the oldone. Please what does this mean for the app and its business in general.

Where are the graphic designers, brand advertisers in the house...

Let's talk about this and the importance of re-branding for business sustainability. Biko, I want to learn!

SirWere:
I never really understood Booty Calls

You can read about it here!

http://deedeesblog.com/2016/04/28/deedees-musings-friends-with-benefit-or-booty-call/

MRBrownJ:
it all depends on the guidelines and rules that you guys put up for yourselves.... and sticking by them at ALL cost. there is no shame in telling them NO, every time they want to deviate from the rules.

i believe that such r/ship can last forever, so long as both still get that sexual connection, especially if you dont meet as often.

I like the fact that you highlighted the 'all' in the cost! Have you thought about the fact that as humans that we are, No matter the 'all' in the cost! The sexual activity sometimes tend to deflate our very sense of objectivity!

That's why I'm saying that, if it were a purely platonic relationship, it will be easier for the 'all' to be enforcible!

Last week, we tried analyzing the difference between Booty Calls and Friends with benefit. I also mentioned the fact that there should be guidelines in place in order to avoid emotional strings, if both parties intend to keep the friendship as sane as possible.

Some people may believe that friends with benefit can work for as long as they want it. The question is for how long do you think you can have sex without emotional strings, you think you can stay so long without that feeling of togetherness and longing?

For me though, my best bet is six months, really. After six months, you should begin to re analyse what you signed up for because bet it with me, it really starts to get confusing.

Most times, I have noticed that women may want to renege from what they signed for to want something more committed, however the guy tries everything to want to be out of total and absolute commitment. He may eventually crumble when he realizes that he is over dependent on the woman. The woman being very smart realizes that over-dependence and she begins to seek a more structured relationship.

At this point, the onus lies on the man to either join the train, hit the road or scram almost immediately. Man, sometimes being a very insatiable human will (most times) go for the ride, because you cannot imagine me having a great sexual union for 6 months and just hop off like that! Mba! It will be highly implausible that the average man would give up.

Now the point here is not to draw into a relationship if you don’t want one. If what you seek is strictly a friendship that is beneficial. Then I would suggest you re-evaluate the togetherness after 6 months.

Certain inside questions need to be asked, Do we discuss other personal issues apart from sex?, Do I miss her more than just having sex? If the answers to these questions are in the affirmative, Ask yourself a final one, if you would like her to be your girlfriend, If the answer to this final is Yes! Oh Boy!, just go ahead and make it official.

If your answers are negative though, cut it off straight away. Be very fast about it, Yoruba people will say ‘Do not attempt to even smell what you do not intend to eat’ Easy does it, aye?

Casual sex, booty calls, friends with benefit are not like relationships. They don’t last forever. Be smart about it, if you don’t want it to elevate to a level where you never intended it to be. Cut it short!

How long have you gone on casual sex with a lady before...How long did you stay on a friends with benefit thingy before it turned into something else! Let's have you speak!

At www.deedeesblog.com, we look at lifestyle through romance, events and photography! Check us out today!

buskie13:
#sackyourgf if she ff the Teebillz n Tiwas saga and start telling u how billz was a coke sniffer..she can as well use that line on u

Hahahahaha.... I'm telling you...

SmooshCHN:
This challenge is really challenging. I can't seem to wrap my arms around it.

Lol!

H2Ossss:
before you write the letter finish 1 sharp guy don bleep her 3 rounds... crush cor, grind ni.

Na you be the sharp guy?

obiorathesubtle:
bloody goose shït I didn't read..

Lazy!