₦airaland Forum

^sure, the rat appears to be donko********

One year a Brazilian lady happened to win the miss world beauty pageantry. And was invited by the organizers of the English Premier League for some ceremonial kickoff after which a gala night followed. At the end of the event, she had the opportunity to express her appreciation. Hear her: "Izz my pleazure to come here today to kickoff ya ball. I will be happy to be available to kickoff ya balls anytime you call me in future."

>>where's the joke?

^I need the address to police section.

mikuz:
somebody is going to get hurt!

*mikuz starts beating ayo*

I'll call police for u.

kwel, more than a joke. It's a comedy.

mikuz:
and eke,
my hand dey do me like say make i break coke bottle for person head.
You notice am?

fire down bro. am by your side, I'd be carrying the crate in case u need more.

nellycul28:
@eke, u re 15 yrs & all u re concerned wit is bosom,

After u'll say u re a leader of 2moro,



U re a FARM ANIMAL!!

ur father, mother, grand parents and all ur family members are f**kTARDS. If u don't have respect for yourself I'd teach u to have for others. HEEDIOT! In fact your level of insanity got no appropriate classification, Doctors are still carrying out a research on it. You just don't let me think of you after I finish typing this comment.

I wish I could see u physically to ascertain how old u are, it's u who should be thinking of being a leader of tomorrow. in case u don't know am already a leader. Your entire generation is a disgrace to humanity. I wish I knew you physically, I'd get the boys to humble u in front of your family compound. NONSENSE.

You just jump into what u don't know & u want to be the F**kn hero. No wonder trigger happy men finish some fools easily. You could be the next watch ur back.

mikuz:
eke,
its about time i brought in the coconut water and the koboko!
Cos Somebody dey try em self for here!

I believe u bro., pls come fast we can bring fufu water too so that in case one fails the other will step in. LMFAO
(mbre fiyafi)

Idowuogbo, please commenting on my thread ain't compulsory and if you don't joke with people please don't abuse me. I don't know you and you don't know me. I think this is a place for fun and not fighting. Never you call me stupid or fool again please for our peaceful coexistence or I WILL make you hate the internet. Trust me, I mean every single bit of it.

mikuz:
alright,
keep on posting her

I will post her, but see u've just aggravated the issue, the women are after me. Haba mikuz for God's sake.

Idowuogbo:
Now dis wot we get wen some mothers overdose on paraga while pregnant.

Poster its not ur fault I understand,jus visit d LuNa section in LUTH u hia.

Idowu u must have visited that place before and I learnt u're their newest recruitment officer. Could kindly tell us about your experience?

AYODEJI4LOVE:
I guess this op is still a novice, or maybe, i just wonder why some people jump around and post anywhere they feel like

*sighs* Mikuz pls somebody needs cele water sprinkling here and some koboko

it's meant to be posted here mikuz, no explanation section.

@mikuz am 15yrs old, what next?

anybody who thinks am not permitted to post herE should go hug an electric transformer.

^ it's an explanation mikuz

A man and his wife got into the habit of calling making love 'phone calls'. This was purely so that nobody including their kids would understand them.
One day the man while in the bedroom with his son sent him to tell mummy that daddy wants to make calls. But the woman through the boy replied that mummy has gone out of service(she didn't want to be screwed at least for the time being). The man sent his son to go and tell mummy that daddy would go make calls outside if she says that again. When the boy passed the message to his mother, she burst saying "IF YOUR DADDY EVER GOES OUT TO MAKE A CALL, I'D TURN THIS HOUSE INTO A CENTRAL CONTROL TELEPHONY EXCHANGE UNIT FOR THIS ZONE".

mikuz:
eke,
you are lucky the kind of mods we have here are akin to Nigerian politicians!

@mikuz what mods are u talking about

nellycul28:
its like Dame Patience Goodluck Jonathan taught u english in ur nursery school, OLODO!!

who are u referring to pls.

mikuz:
then why don't you take it to food or favourite section?
This is jokes section in case you cant read!


#occupy ben-10

I must post here.

otooro:
what a thread! so boring

Well, if it's boring u can wear skirt take a snap shot and show us, no probs it could make this thread interesting.

Meanwhile nobody's telling that 3nrest guy to go to xerox section where he could dispplay his talent better.

pls u guys shld tell this fellow to obtain copyrights before copying my jokes. So sad.
https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-850747.0.html#msg10008560

There are many way to identify people who were or are still excellent xerox machines in school. Infact where's the joke
Follow the link to figure who's copying who.

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-850089.0.html

ty Boo, I wish I could give u a k*SS.
As for Mikuz, Bright, Bumioguns, we're not gonna vote for ya. Ben-10's my man, if subsidy refuses to come back we'll get a Camel to go and bring him back, I can't betray him.

just passing, ,my dear as I was saying people who always talk about underwear are serious threat to the society. Beware!!

**YAWNS**

this looks like where the okada men, truck pushers, labourers, snuff sellers usually have their annual dinner

@Otoor, Mikuz, boo, bright007 pls check if this's a joke or not

https://www.nairaland.com/nigeria/topic-850799.0.html

We are sad to announce that NJPC have decided to unleash terror to unsuspecting victims via the joke section of Nairaland and are truly sorry to do so. But with the warning, you are covered. Now here's the reason why we decided you come with your own handcuff.

1. First time, Port Harcourt was the location -24 persons went mad. We were there with only 10 handcuffs, we ended using it on 20 persons.

2. Next we tried it in Benin -60 persons went mad. We had 20 handcuffs for only 40 persons.

3. We went on to Lagos -73 persons went mad. We had only 30 handcuffs.

4. Aba was the next port of call -88 went mad. We had only 40 handcuffs.

We decided to stop this shows but the Federal mental health organization threatened to drag us to court, Yaba left threatened to strangle us. With this predicament, we are tired of buying handcuffs, hence we decided to inform you in advance.

Benefits of attending:

1. No gate fees.
2. You can meet your mate here.
3. You could lose your mate here.
4. You could be signed into our record label.
5. You are allowed to repost our jokes outside nairaland(free copyrights) at your risk though.

Yours truly,
For: NJPC

~~Let the Terror begin, grrrrrrrr~~

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RELEASE DATE : January 1, 2012
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, nAIJA AIN'T SAFE FOR THE pOOR,
CHECK FILLING STATIONS AND WATERSIDES TO GRAB YOUR COPY NOW!!!!

mikuz:
eke,
me too,
i dont understand what the topic is all about.
If its a waec question or a joke,
na only God know!!

am just telling u my best food or is it a sin to share your privatecy with nairalanders?

tnx boo, with pple like u we're more than ever determined to tell more jokes.

I seriously don't understand Mikuz. By the way I thought we only had #Occupy Nigeria, who's #Occupy ben-10?

NTA or Silverbird report.
No u mean report card.

sorry, who is reporting who?

Not really, it's like a humor. What do u think?

@Otooro, I think we can sprinkle Toto water on Mikuz. That'll do, I heard it produces enough itching to even cure a properly demon possessed fellow. Just a suggestion

OMG! these guyses are damn funny. LMFAO

Last night I was in the restaurant and after having meal I decided to have a cup of coffee and enjoy the music being played.
Now I needed to fart but was enjoying the music and couldn't go. So the music got better and was really loud. So I timed my
fart with the beats of the music and started releasing it accordingly while nodding my head.

Suddenly people started gathering around me, it was then I realized I had my ipod on and no music was there in the restaurant.

mikuz:
eke,
now your last post was the joke!

thanks bro (bow)
watch out for the next joke in a few minutes.

nice ones but omg! I forgot