₦airaland Forum

izeek:
do u know how many people on here have their bf/gf's here on NL.
[b]the trick is to remain anonymous, act like u dont know each other and only reply to post like neutral person.
don't even let ppl know who he is, [/b]but the only snag is he might fall in love with some other forumite.
there lies your problem.

gaby no. dont let him.  my sister inlaw is here but my brother wont come. i have close friends and family members here too like you said we want to remain anonymous.   i think that should be agreed before he comes on if he must come

personally, i wont encourage my other half to become a member even though she read some pages i visit.  there is too much unnecessary abuse and childishness on NL that some people need shielding from especially non Nigerians.

estrella:
i hope this helps!! i have been in a long distance relationship for almost four years and we have managed to keep the flame alive although at some point, it gets really tiring especially when i see my girlfriends around me trooping off to see their men after work and i''m hauling my tired ass home all alone, or when they get to hang out weekends and i go home to spend the weekend with my parents, it can be extremely challenging and several time i''ve broken up with him because of it but we always get back together because i know that i have a good thing in that man, when you get tired or challenged by what you see around you,remember what made you fall in love wiht him in the first place, take yourself to a point where you remind yourself why he is worth it, its like my mother always says, NO CONDITION IS PERMANENT!!, you may be apart today but the tides of fate have a way of turning in your favor when you hold on and persevere, Just be open with him about how u feel and don't allow pple around you influence u, defy the norm, dont follow it!! [b]With God, all things are possible.! in the meantime, keep yourself busy, when youre not busy,the tendency for temptation increases, youre obviously single, so focus on becoming a better wife material who adds value to everyone around so that when you do get married,your man won't regret it and neither will you, cheers!![/b]

you are so true and right.

funmi def sells on NL

observer status

stbaby:
If you the wife knows exactly what to do your husband will be the baby that he is meant to be in your hands,

visit www.gethimbacktips..com for details

didnt they say wisdom is too expensive for the fool?

Fhemmmy:
That isn't what the Bible said.
If there is Adultery involved, u can divorce.
If the man/woman is suffering the other with sex, u can divorce

how can u divorce when bible talk more on forgiveness than divorce. yesterday you were throwing bible like confettis now it is divorce. how old are u and are u married at all?

24volts:
hello guys,
iam very grateful to all you support and advice, my prayer is that you all shall never see this kind of issue.
Iam back in Nigeria, I have been playing with my lovely son.
my wife parents came in with her and she starts to beg and made a confession that through me into more confusion,
she said " that he knew the guy from university, that the guy proposed marriage to her and she accepted. but somewhere along the line the guy relocated to PH and they keep communicating, until the guy stopped calling her. this happened before I met her four years ago. the guy came back to Lagos early this year and found her in the Church and they both exchanged phone numbers again. this time around Ihave married her. she said that both of them took an oath " not to leave each other" and that the guy threatened to kill her if she leaves her, based on the oath they took far back in the university. she even mentioned the name of the Babalawo that prepared the oath in Ibadan, somewhere in Bodija according to her.
the issue at hand is getting complicated every time.
well my plan now is to go to police 2morow to bail the guy and call his family for meeting.
this shows my initial plan for my wife is on hold for now.
Tears rolled down my cheek, when my son on sighting the mother screamed a loud happy noise that attracted my tenant.
Guys like i said please pray every day that God should not bring this kind of trouble in your life. I read some people saying it is not real, please for the doughting Thomas es
you can visit

1. Ajao Est Police comm. and make enquiry
if not for security reason I would have disclosed my house add ,

anything is possible in that brothel called nigeria.
so what happens if she has covenant with another guy?
you wont travel again abi?
how many more security cameras do you need?
why is the bobo locked up?

Epiphany:
Let us also remember, my friends, that whatever venture anyone engages in [within the boundaries of our country, Nigeria] is bound to be tainted in one way or the other. If the government as an institution is not involved in that venture, people will be involved. Whichever way you look at it, someone is always trying to cheat, outsmart or use you. In trying to guard against being used by the government, other institutions or the people, you may end up breaking one or two rules and regulations, which will one day speak out against you. Yes, this happens in other countries, where you have to be smart when running a business. However, the problem in Nigeria is that because most big businesses want to survive successive government rules and regulations, they always, ALWAYS end up doing business with the government and/or promoting one regime or the other. This becomes a problem because since there is no continuity in our governments, every successive government finds fault with what happened in the previous dispensations.

This is where wahala starts!

you are so right.  that was why i mentioned being " caught up in nigeria's business politics ".  nigeria is one corrupt place to do anything in.  these guys got caught up in political and ethnic power fights.  the RKO i know will never do anything wrong but i know too the presure to sign away 9 figure loans like pure water in nigeria just to keep your job let alone keep your bank. go see the amount of rural branches that are created in th emost unprofitable locations only becos some big man or woman came from there and you begin to see what i mean.

nigeria is one big corrupt failed state

nmadi:
My beautiful sister, I say beautiful because that is what God says about you. I had something similar to that, but I am fully back on my feet. let me tell you the secret, I got closer to God, I fell in love with Him, He didnt disapoint me, infact He made WAYS for me. I will advise you to do likewise, get closer to Him.

God loves you more than any man could ever do.

thank you for being a star

brother in law don dey join MIL's and friends for naija.

hausa, islam and polygamy? bed fellows

will watch this one even though it a repeat  thread now

L jay:
see lady let me ask you some questions.

at what age do you think a guy would finish his BACHELOR'S DEGREE in NIGERIA?

Before a guy can have all what you have mentioned all by himself, at least he would have his MASTER'S DEGREE.

At what age would that be?

Only if it is INHERITED, MONEY RITUALS, SMUGGLING, ASSASSINATION, YAHOO.

ONE MORE QUESTION

DO YOU WANT TO MARRY FOR HIS MONEY OR FOR HIS LOVE.

i beg most naija marriage na for convinience so wetin be all this shouting for.  the girl talk true  una wan tear her to pieces the ones wey no talk true na una like.  typical  naija

Ujujoan:
'Let he who has no sin be the first to cast the Stone'!!

I know I sounded a lil bit ambitious, but I also know 90% of you all talking here wants comfort as well.

Guys date girls for being beautiful or even rich. What's wrong in me wanting a rich guy?

What I have to offer in return is totally irrelevant; and the fact that I dont date broke guys does not make me a Golddigger!

I dont intend to settle for an abusive or demeaning relationshiop with my hubby, but I dont intend to settle for a broke one either.

I'm not naive enough not to realize that money corrupts, but I also know that a corrupt man will be corrupt with or without the money.

Now I made this post because I got tired of my family and friends telling me that letting that young man go because he dosent stay in his own house is a wrong decision. And that dating that rich guy is trouble in disguise. I just need to feel a sense of financial security for me to be content in a relationship or even in marriage. Otherwise I'm just going to feel the guy's not man enough!!

I'm prepared to build a future with a guy, I just dont want to start from the scratch!!

you are right in your thinking most people telling you otherwise here are wrong becos they will definately prefer life the way you stated it here.

i am beginning to sence political correctness come to NL.

poverty is a curse. i dont know when nigerians started taking vows for poverty

ade2kay:
Kai, this is getting personal.
Na wa o

@op
You called for insults, you will receive it in abundance.

To list qualities of a man you'd like to marry like u'd list a horse's qualities for a horse race, you're in for serious insults

ade2kay:
Kai, this is getting personal.
Na wa o

@op
You called for insults, you will receive it in abundance.

To list qualities of a man you'd like to marry like u'd list a horse's qualities for a horse race, you're in for serious insults

why must she be insulted for saying she do not want to marry por?  if you guys like poverty by all means pick as much as you want  why must she live for you?  

why would you insult someone for wanting a better life she didnt say she wants to go and steal and this from you guys celebrating thieves and giving them chieftancy titles

r231:
thats not true  

wetin no be true for wetin she talk?

Guys date girls for being beautiful or even rich. What's wrong in me wanting a rich guy?

you didnt answer your question. me i just praise the Lord for her

Basildon1:
How can you say he had no business aborting?It was part of his training.In most countries,it is legal as long the foetus is under 24 wks and a doctor determines that it could damage the physical or MENTAL state of the female. A doctor has a responsibilty to disregard sentiment and do what is right! Go and read about how mothers treat their supporter of APC children in Sudan!

mr essex, i know too that most civilized people will give a doctor the right to folow his/ her instincts. what is right is not presurising a doctor to violate his/ her conscience. there are many other doctors who will gladly do this in nigeria so why only this doctor. as i have said before the abortion industry in nigeria is one big industry so why force this guy to do it.

[size=28pt]Husband or Dictator?[/size]
By J. Lee Grady

Does the Bible really say for husbands to be "priests" to their wives? Some men claim this to validate their authoritarian behavior.

As a Bible-believing Christian, Mike was the spiritual leader of his home. He believed that in order to be a faithful man of God he must always "be in charge." His wife, Jill, and their four children graciously submitted to his authority.

Mike insisted on controlling every aspect of home life. Jill was not allowed to handle any aspect of the family finances.

Jill felt God wouldn't be pleased if she didn't respect Mike's headship, so she eventually became numb to her husband's demands. Mike was never physically abusive, but his constant criticism made Jill feel like a worthless spiritual zombie.

It all erupted one day when their 5-year-old son, Tyler*, got the flu. Usually Mike and Jill tried natural remedies before seeing a doctor, but in this instance Tyler didn't seem to be responding to the natural products. After he'd had a high fever for several days, Jill took the boy to the doctor, who told her Tyler had a respiratory infection that required antibiotics.

Jill had a prescription filled and intended to give a dose to Tyler immediately. But when Mike learned about the doctor's report, he told Jill not to give Tyler the medicine.

No matter how much Jill pleaded, he refused—saying that the antibiotics might have negative side effects. Jill was so concerned for her son's safety that she threatened to give the medicine to Tyler anyway. Mike then shot back: "I am the head of this house! You have to do what I say!"

Jill felt she'd been pushed into a corner by her husband's ironclad demands. Finally she placed the matter in God's hands.

The next morning Tyler was so sick he couldn't get up to the table to eat. Jill was desperate and dared to express her concerns. "Is it right to withhold something from him that you know will alleviate his symptoms and help him get well?" she asked.

Mike finally gave in. Within 24 hours Tyler had improved, and in only a few days he was well.

Mike and Jill, meanwhile, were nursing the wounds that had resulted from this quarrel. Mike's pride was hurt because he felt his leadership had been challenged.

Jill felt exhausted from having to push so hard to help her son. Their marriage was frayed in the process—and they eventually had to seek counseling.

These kinds of disagreements occur in Christian homes every day. In many cases, husbands and wives who argue over an issue agree to sit down, listen to each other, try to understand the other spouse's perspective and then decide on a resolution. That's the way conflict management is supposed to work.

But domestic strife can't be resolved if the husband believes: (1) that he is always right; (2) that it is wrong for him to defer to his wife; or (3) that his masculinity is weakened if he admits a mistake. If he believes all three of these fallacies, he qualifies as a first-degree tyrant.

Patriarchs Don't Live Here Anymore
When I preach about gender equality in the church, many women come to me and say, "But I have been taught that my husband is the priest of the home." I challenge them to look up that phrase in the Bible. Show me one verse that says husbands should serve as priests for their wives!

Many Christian traditionalists maintain that women should live in the background and allow their husbands to represent them to the church and to God. They also teach that the husband is responsible for the wife's behavior, as if she were some kind of puppet on a string whom he must manipulate.

They have the audacity to use this unbiblical concept of the priestly husband to justify abusive, authoritarian behavior. This is emotionally crippling to women—and it is heresy!

The Bible tells us that under the old covenant, before the redemptive work of Christ and the advent of the Holy Spirit, God dealt with men through priests. But now that Jesus has secured our access into the presence of God, we all have been qualified to be priests unto God.

Peter says we are part of a "royal priesthood" (1 Pet. 2:9, NKJV). He does not say that this priesthood is exclusively male or that it refers to husbands. There is no reference to gender because "there is neither male nor female, in Christ" (Gal. 3:28).

Women have been clothed with the priestly garments of holiness, and they have been commissioned to exercise His authority. No husband has the biblical right to stand in his wife's way, and no wife should use "male headship" to excuse herself from fulfilling God's call on her life.

"Headship" is another popular word thrown around in conservative religious circles. Many Christian men believe their spirituality is measured by the level of control they exert over their wives through "male headship."

These guys think they are being "real men of God" if they refuse to listen to their wives' counsel. Where did we get the idea that an authoritarian style of leadership is even remotely Christlike?

The rigid view of the Christian family says that men have been placed in the God-ordained role of full-time boss. The husband's role, according to the conservative religious model, is to lead and protect his wife, while her role is to trust him and submit to his authority at all times without question. Since he is supposedly smarter, stronger and more spiritually capable, the woman has no option but to accept this arrangement.

This view has been derived by misreading the words of Paul in Ephesians 5:23–24: "For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything."

We must remember that at the time Paul penned these words (probably A.D. 60), women had no rights and were viewed as the property of either their fathers or their husbands. In Ephesus during New Testament times, a man's idea of "ruling the family" was to keep his wife shut away in the house to do backbreaking chores, tend the family farm, provide sexual gratification and bear as many children as possible.

If she died in childbirth, he found another wife. If she didn't please him in bed, he paid a younger woman outside the home to meet his sexual needs. If his wife shamed him, he beat her.

Historian Ruth Tucker notes that in ancient Greek society, most men considered their homebound wives boring—so they typically sought the companionship of heterae, or professional Follows. Yet when Paul introduced the Christian message to the Ephesians, he came with a radically new model of family that went to the very core of what was wrong with the world: "Husbands, love your wives" (Eph. 5:25).

Perhaps we don't realize what a revolutionary concept these four words were in the first century! It was even more radical when Paul told the men of Ephesus to love their wives "as their own bodies" (v. 28).

This meant that men and women were equals. It meant that Christian men would have to break out of their pagan Middle Eastern mind-set and stop looking down on the wives as if they were brainless, inferior animals. Paul's simple words shattered gender prejudice at its core.

And when Paul told the men to love their wives "as Christ also loved the church" (v. 25), he implied something even more revolutionary: Women are just as deserving of the grace of God as men are. We find in these tender verses the bedrock foundation for the Christian idea of gender equality.

Two Kinds of Christian Husbands
Paul's words to the Ephesians blatantly contradicted the worldly philosophy of the ancient world, which taught that men and women live in two different social strata. In the kingdom of God, Paul declared, men don't beat their wives, rule their homes like despots or threaten divorce as a means to manipulate or control. In God's kingdom, husbands treat their wives with respect—yes, even as equals.

Paul was declaring in this passage that men are no longer "over" women. Husbands can no longer dominate their wives or treat them like chattel.

Now that Jesus Christ has come, the curse of male domination over females that began in the Garden of Eden has been broken. Women have been restored to a place of respect and dignity! This was good news for the women of Ephesus; it is good news for all women today.

But if this is true, then why does Paul still say the husband should function as the "head" of his wife? (See Eph. 5:23.) Does this not give him the right to dominate her? That depends on whether we want a Christian model of leadership or a worldly one.

The husband does function as a leader. But the gospel of Jesus Christ—who was the ultimate example of the compassionate "servant leader"—does not allow men to impose leadership in an authoritarian way, nor can men view their role as "head" as part of a God-sanctioned hierarchy that places them over their wives to domineer them or to deny their rights.

Ephesians 5 is not about hierarchy; it is about equality. But if we read Paul's words through a warped lens, it's easy to impose our own misconceptions about male-female relationships on the text. That's why we need the Holy Spirit to help us when we read the Scriptures.

Rebecca Merrill Groothuis, in her book, Good News for Women (Baker), explains that there are really two kinds of male headship from which to choose. One is what she calls "life-giving headship," which was instituted by God in the Garden of Eden when He took Eve out of Adam's side.

The opposing model is what she refers to as "ruling headship," which began with the fall, when man and woman came under the curse of sin. Christian men today often view ruling headship as the godly way to lead a family—but it is the wrong model.

Writes Groothuis: "The biblical headship of the husband described in Ephesians 5 is redemptive, in that it mitigates the effect of the fall which places the woman under male rule, and it helps to reinstate woman in her creational place of cultural responsibility alongside man. In life-giving headship, the social privilege and power of maleness is shared by the husband with the wife, and utilized by him according to the terms of love rather than of male conquest and demand."

Some Christian husbands have made a lifestyle out of being benevolent dictators—and they quote portions of Ephesians 5 to defend their behavior. Tragically, many women have embraced the idea of being Christian doormats, and they have made their subservience such a part of their identity as women that it has become a place of security for them that they cannot abandon.

I pray you will not let a false concept of "male headship" stop you from fulfilling your high calling in Christ.

J. Lee Grady is the editor of Charisma magazine and author of 10 Lies the Church Tells Women, from which this article is adapted. He and his wife, Deborah, recently celebrated their 25th wedding anniversary.

http://www.newmanmag.com/e-magazine/081709/story5.php

nigeria and politricks

[quote author=ola_ide link=topic=311416.msg4373826#msg4373826 date=1250601149]Na wao! So, a girl can't have a vibrator in this country? I would have gotten one the last time i travelled abroad but i was so occupied with my son i totally forgot.
Since i don't have a man now i decided to get one. Abeg someone should come to my rescue with the requested info.[/quote]after all your body nor be fire wood abi?

Godalone:
God will forgive them if they ask for forgiveness but leaving those wives will not be a solution.My father has 7 wives are you saying he should leave the women he married over 40 years ago? Never.

7 wives ke?

God help us.

lucabrasi:
its not workable at all,for the ones already in it,i think they should be working more on prevention of a future occurence of such cases,another thing is that  they shouldnt turn a blind eye to it when it involves rich/eminent people in the church,when these ppl know that the church wouldnt allow it then it ll be eradicated in the church

why is this not workable?

sheniqua:
[size=28pt]that's why people should not complicate their lives in the first instance.[/size]

true words my dear sister.

me likey:
WHO THE HECK IS THIS 'SISSY' OF A PERSON, U MUST FEEL LIKE U HAVE AN ABUNDANCE OF WISDOM, I CAN UNDERSTAND THE SO CALLED 'ETHICS', BUT MISS I M HOLIER THAN THOU, ARENT WE ALL SINNERS IN ONE WAY OR THE OTHER, I M GONNA BE VERY BLUNT BE CAUSE I THINK SEUN AND BASILDON HAVE SAID IT ALL AND SINCE U ARE NOT EVEN THE POSTER I WOULDNT WASTE MY TIME ON U

DRHARRY, I M NOT GOD AND NEITHER AM I THE DEVIL BUT SOME REAL SITUATIONS ARISE IN LIFE THAT REALLY PUT US IN A TIGHT CORNER AND WE COULD DAMN RIGHT BE ASKING WHY ME, IF ACCORDING TO UR WORK ETHICS U CANT DO IT, WOULD UR CONSCIENCE ALLOW U REFER HER TO SOMEONE ELSEWHO IS CAPABLE OR MAYBE ALLOW HER OUT OF SHAME AND FRUSTRATION TAK HER OWN LIFE, AND IF U THINK DEEPLY AND U KNOW WITHIN U THAT U CAN DO THIS AND SAVE A LIFE, PLEASE DO AND HOWEVER TERRIBLE IT MAY SOUND, ASK GOD FOR FORGIVENESS COS I KNOW DAMN WELL THAT IF THAT 15 YEAR OLD GIRL ISNT RESCUED, SHE'S GONNA END UP GETTING REED OF THAT PREGNANCY EITHER BY DAMAGING HER REPRODCTV ORGANS/ENDING HER LIFE OR THE PREGNANCY WOULD END UP RUINING HER LIFE ONE WAY OR THE OTHER

Basildon1:
WHY the hell are nigerians hypocrites? Put yourself in her shoes of havin the child of a rapist. It's traumatic enough, not to think of having a baby to remind you all your life

I guess you wil be celebrating at the naming ceremony and inviting your friends,abi, Do people think at all? A 15yr old to start living a life of disgrace early? No offence, some ppl on NL lack common sense!!

i not fot argue. so a 15 y/o should not suffer but a doctor should suffer the angusih of violating his own principles. what is right in that? it should be on his conscience he aborted a child that he has no busines aborting. have you heard the word blood on your hands?

Jarus:
The same goes for his friend, Femi Adekanye, who I also know closely.

tks. maybe that is why they got along then apart from their love for banking.
where are they now? what do they do now?

candyshore:
most african men esp. first sons are mamas boy so the best  is to try be freinds with her.  moreover-
'ifyalways"- has said it all. but for me i dont think any mother in law can chase me out of my house except i ve really done somthin really bad.
and no mother in law can really be like ur mother they will just try to be.

my ma inlaw has 6 daughter in laws. they all worship the ground she walk on. truth is that many nigerian look for trouble too much and dont know the colour of peaceful living.

presido1:
never new u are this intelligent, are u married? can i know you? infact can u marry me?

what can i say?

Jarus:
I followed the two men(Femi Adekanye and Ralph Osayameh) in the 1990s. Femi Adekanye was my role model then when my sole ambition, as a young Junior secondary student was to grow up and become a banker like Adekanye and I actually knew him personally. I have spoken with him a couple of times after his release from prison. I have read the two books he wrote while in prison, DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL and PRESUMED GUILTY.

He was a philantropist to the core. In his account of his ordeals, as I read in his 'PRESUMED GUILTY', he claimed IBB and Abacha witchhunted him for associating with MKO. Another account had it that it was because he refused to sell his bank, Commerce bank, to Abiola.

But sentiments apart, I struggle to accept his ordeal was political. Even if it was political, I think they were the ones that took a petrol bath, making it easy for their enemies to roast them. I read his book but struggled to get convinced that the Ile-Oluji loan deal was not recklessness on Adekanye's and Osayameh's side.

On the part in bold, are you sure being gentle and morally upright make one immune from recklessness? Remember they did not steal, they only mismanaged.

thanks.  you missed

caught up in nigeria's business politics

part.   i didnt read the books but i know ile-oluji was originally a UBA loan facility so that was technically osayamehs baby because he knew the facility having been area manager for UBA benin/ ondo earlier .  dont forget he is an ondo man too. he is from a  little village called ijagba off benin/ ifon road.

there were people like UBA's alhaji mutallab, mallam tukur and baffa were always ready to make an example of him for bailing out of UBA.

yes he took one already bad and doubtfull debt does that make him evil or wicked?  he made an error of judgement how many other nigerian goest to jail for making error of judgement?.  mr osayameh was one thorough human being but you need to know the political and tribal pressures that comes with every project of the types you are mentioning here.  are we not talking about nigeria here?.  i worked in commercial dept. as loans and credits was called in those days.  i know the voice of some obas and powerful sons/ daughters of the soils pursuing approval of loans/ facilities for questionable projects for thier places. some of these facilities were signed at head office levels before regional offices knew about them.  

most nigeria's business succeed or fail on political or tribal patronage and nothing more.  you need to navigate many land mines when doing business in naija than most people care to know.

having said that i still choose to believe he is a very nice man.  he is not one of those greedy arrogant nigerians.  he is a man of great humility and respect for everyone he came accross it doesnt matter who you are he respected you. that was the RKO i knew and choose to remember. a fine decent man

boobsy:
@ francis nwaeze, Am very flaterred to know women like me are very rare to come by, thanks for letting me know. It makes me feel special but, i have to start all over again by taking the right steps. I hope to keep in touch anyway.


I've actually thought about my life all over and realiazed what lucy_p said about killing myself and maybe those around me is very true.I've decided to take a vacation next month by the Grace of God. Am starting my life all over but this time, with Christ leading me.

lucy_p think am soooooooooooo dummbbbbbbbbbb, smile. That, I never knew until i ended up with a slowpoke like my ex. Thank God now i know.


Thanks so much y'all. God bless you

dont mind her you are not dumb you got taken in by another foolish liar nigerian man. get over him and seek God to heal you. you might just find your right man. and please dont become a lesbian cos it is not worth it. they disappoint too what will you become then sleeping with animals? me think you are more than that.

your life cannot be over. who is the silly boy that is capable of taking your life?

Sisi Jinx:
So the gist of this is that you went out with a guy with No job, No Money, No Roof over his head who ended up cheating on you and infecting you with STD?

Sigh!

I don't know what to say, except you are a GOOD PERSON. How else can you explain dating a guy who is so beneath you?

Girls like you make me wish I was a better person. See, my thinking is this, If I'm gonna go through all the normal nonsense with a guy (i.e the cheating, the lying, the breaking your heart, the having no respect for you, etc) then the guy had better be SOMETHING OF WORTH. . .that's the least he can do.

Basically you bought the STD and heartbreak with your hard earned money!!!!

Sigh!

Good Person, that's what you are. . . I tells ya.

again another failure on your part. if you taught her how to be a good girl this idot wont have taken advantage to this extent. imagive sleep, STD, give belle and abortion.

how much can a young girl take?

Gentlelady:
I cannot believe you wasted two good years of your life because of a worthless man like your ex bf!     Please forget the loser and move on.  I know there are lot of bad guys out there but there are still some good ones to pick. In your next relationship do not be so  desperate ^{(for lack of a better word).}.      All the best!

nice one thanks

ifyalways:
Marriage needs not just love bla bla to survive but lots of wisdom and patience.The lady shld have allowed her MIL to go with her to the mkt and bore the woman so much that she wud run back home herself.She went too far telling the MIL shes old school,wud she have told her mother same if she made such a request?.Sometimes we really dont understand the bond btw mothers and their children,Boys esp till u have one,so i guess she really hurt the MIL with that statement.
Well,if she wants to keep her home,she shld find a way to make peace to the MIL even if it means apologising,Lets face the facts,it wud really be difficult for a man to take sides with the wife over the mother,even if he does today . . . .he wud still one day go back to his mum esp African men.If u want a happy home,plsssss try as much as possible to see ur MIL as ur mother and be at good terms with her.Sometimes,one stoops to conquer.

why cant we make things simple kill every woman immediately first son marries like that we will all be happy no ma in law wahala.

Jarus:
Anyone followed the failed banks proceedings of the mid-90s?
Anyone knew Commerce bank?
Anyone knew Drs Femi Adekanye and Ralph Osayameh?

Well, the failed banks saga of the 1990s erupted from the enforcement of the failed bank decree of 1991 that swept away top bank chiefs of that period, just as Sanusi's invocation of BOFIA is sweeping off some reckless bank chiefs of today.
Commerce Bank Ltd was one of the banks licensed in 1989, alongside Intercontinental, Zenith,IBTC and a host of others, and the bank was owned by Chief Femi Adekanye and Dr Ralph Osayameh. These banks, later dubbed second generation banks, began what is now known as glamorous banking. They revolutionized banking with perks and flamboyant living by bank executives and all the First and Union banks of this world suddenly became old school, the ugly bride.

For reasons, which a decade later some people still believe was political, the military government's axe dangled on some of these bank chiefs, most prominently Dr. Femi Adekanye and Ralph Osayameh, Vice Chairman/CEO and Chairman respectively of the then Commerce bank. The then John Ebodaghe-led NDIC accused them of breaching lending principles in giving loans to Ile Oluji company(a company that later went under) and they were imprisoned in additon to their banks being liquidated.

Dr. Femi Adekanye FCIB was a seasoned banker and author of books on Finance. He was the President of the Chartered Institute of Bankers of Nigeria(CIBN) 1991-93 and President of the West African Bankers Association.The guy he co-founded Commerce Bank with, Dr. Ralph Osayameh, was also a past president of CIBN. In fact the fall of their bank is still being used in Finance lessons as reference point in how professional banking certificates/qualifications do not translate to proper management of bank. Imagine a bank run by two former CIBN presidents failing!

While Adekanye and Osayameh were among the superbankers of that era(like the Jim Ovia and Tony Elumelu of today), Akingbola was in a lower class then. He was the youngest bank CEO when those banks were licensed in 1989. By 1994-96 when Adekanye and co were on trial, Akingbola, though still lower than these more renowned bank chiefs, was already a member of CIBN board. Recall Adekanye and Osayameh were past presidents. The two folk, seeing that their free fall was on the way, contacted Akingbola to save their bank from imminent collapse by accepting their merger proposal. Akingbola refused and watched his senior colleagues and their banks crumble. That was the end of their banking career that had spanned four decades. From men that people looked at in awe in Nigeria's financial and social circles, the two men found themselves in Ikoyi prison, in white prison uniform. You know the military. They spent four years in prison. The men soon paled into insignificance in the list of Who's who in Nigeria. one of them is now a lecturer in South Africa.

Fourteen years later, the then young Akingbola now came of age. He rose to positions these men were in 1991-94. He became CIBN president like them. He became NSE Vice-President. He was made Pro-Chancellor of a university. The ovation was loudest. Every young banker was looking forward to become Erastus Akingbola, just as the young bankers of the 90s looked forward to become Femi Adekanye or Ralph Osayameh. That was the peak of his career.

And suddenly, the bubble burst. Akingbola was sent the way of Adekanye and Osayameh, but thank God this is not a military era, he was sent home while the Adekanyes were sent to Ikoyi prison. . . . someone is saying this is retribution for Akingbola's refusal to accept Commerce bank's merger proposal to save his two falling senior colleagues!!!! I do not totally agree.

Like Fola Adeola, I believe Akingbola should have left the scene long ago. My 5 cent.

NB: This is just for the records. I'm not celebrating the fall of anybody. Even if the fall is due to their recklessness and greed, I don't think it's moral to celebrate the fall of another man.

i dont know the other 2 but i know ralph osayameh personally. he is one fine morally upright man that got caught up in nigeria's business politics. unfortunately he is not a politician. i have not heard of him recently cos i dont reside in nigeria. ask anyne who know the man personally they will tell you who he is a fine gengtleman.

he didnt know there was more to banking than knowing figures and being inteligent. everything is politics. tribalism in nigeria

Sisi Jinx:
Lmao. . .I. . .I don't know what to say.

I can't respond to this topic.

how can you dissapoint me like this? i beg talk something nice. tell me it is okay for daughter inlaw to insult mothers and ma inlaws to send her paxcking

thank God for mercies

[quote author=,amebo no1 link=topic=304611.msg4370928#msg4370928 date=1250565272]thank you ,atleast i sabi other foreign languages , what do you know? were you not the same person saying sardines isnt a type of fish?buahahahahahaha i laugh in arochukwu

Madam bushest gurl in nairaland [/quote]you are def something else. is anything worth all these agro?

[quote author=,amebo no1 link=topic=311241.msg4372467#msg4372467 date=1250588317]he is too young t take life seriously, he is not ready for it, which hes showed to the girl alot of times

my 21 yr old son, wouldnt be in this mess by the grace OF GOD, if it werer a woman ehen no problem, women start handling tough issues at an early stage, i am not saying men dont too, but thins guy falls in the category of the unserious ones

He is not ready for marriage, does that guy sound like hes ready for marriage

shes over clouding him, let her give him some space, she wants to make him responsible by force but he is not ready to become responsible[/quote]tot ur trouble making days were over

what a shame

bilms:
i keep wondering,  after getting married,old men still chase young girl,  these men are old enough to be their father,


i wonder why,  this act is bad, and they keep doing it in d name of aristo,

also aristo mothers too

demand and supply.  
you can hardly stay in hotels in naija without bumping into young hookers will you say the men are looking for them there or they make themselves readily available?
which one be aristo mothers?