ngoziwrites: Yes. I don't sound desperate. I have never even mentioned any of these things. Anytime he says things like marriage is hardwork or probably any topic related to marriage, I don't say anything at all.
I just think I should ask now, so we are sure we are looking in the same direction.
Usually, people start relationships with asking a lot of questions. But we didn't start that way. I thought we would even ask basic questions when we see. But we didn't.
He hasn't asked my goals, my plans etc. I want to ask to but he is the one with more power in the relationship. It's his call. So, I can't ask him.
Seeing this comment will make me advise you like a brother and an experienced guy in his 30s that I am as well.
ASKING a guy when he wants to get married after TWO MONTHs is a red flag and absurd! If this must happen so quick, it must come from the GUY not you. If u like ask him from now till tomorrow, if it’s not you, it’s not you!
Let the relationship flow madam ure still 25, u missed the opportunity to ask him before you rushed and Bleep him for three days! So what were you guys discussing for two weeks before you finally met him in person? You knew marriage is paramount to you YET you didn’t prioritize it in your discussion before meeting him in person. Asking him now is DEsPeration. Let things flow at least 6months then u can ask. Then it will make more sense why you’re asking and infact, you might not need to ask again because his actions will most likely tell you all you need to know in that period of 6months except you are not honest with yourself. Good luck!
ngoziwrites: ... I mentioned those things he has just to let u all know he is financially ready. So that part is out. I have never asked him for ordinary 1k and I don't intend. I make my own money. I only want someone with sense.
Women desperate for marriage is a red flag! It’s not bad to want to get married but your desperation at 25 is such a red flag that I can’t even advise you
larryking540: exactly alot of red flags,the mistake the op will do is getting pregnant for him ,that settles it all welcome to baby mamas world without a ring on the middle finger
dear op ,I kw say marriage day shark you ,it's a good thing atleast u desire to be married ,yes life no easy for one person to roll on ,it requires 2person ,,,but truth be told ,that bigger never ready for marriage ,,,,date with a purpose ,say after me ,date with a purpose ,6 months is half a year ,has he made interest to hello your family ,if not hmmmmmmm,,,,,,u just day build marriage for your heart ,,,dear op ,,,we sleep for hotel no be say e go marry you oo,,and pls op can you stop emphasising on what this young man got ,,,it says alot about you ,you want a rich dude but I can smell run away lady from you when calamity falls on that guy.....
Working class lady that earns that figure she earns always believe men should jump at them because they earn well.. They also make emphasis on a guy’s pocket and they do not settle for guys doing less than them financially. All i STATED is the reason why many of them do not get the marriage thing right early OR not get it right at all because they rather go for what they WANT and not what they NEED
Ebubechuwku: All I see here is desperation to get married and if things keep going like this, your decision will hunt you in future...
You are ready financially,mentally and physically, but your partner is not ready, he is not responsible, he still want his freedom.
Another one, don't use money as a criteria for love, unless you just wanna waste ur money. If you like send him all your savings, send him all your parents property document, and you are thinking that he will love you the more, it wil shock you na household he go impregnate las las.
You are 26, don't be in a hurry, look before you leap, there is lot to marriage, than love, so that you won't later rush out of it....
#ire o
Azzin ehn, I wonder why a 25years old babe is this desperate to get married.
Jodha: I don't know why I'm being dragged for making sense.....
Nairaland guys will not cease to amuse me...
Madam u made no sense and ure being dragged for the right reason. Ur post only applies to non existent 1% of women hence why it’s invalidated. 99% of women will date a guy with money first before anything. Money will also attract almost all women. Stop living in denial and start speaking for the majority and not the alomost non existent minority
hashtagged: 95% of women want money everyone wants money stop being a hypocrite, if you don't need money go and marry a broke poor boy, you would probably say no deep down.
And it's true have money and ladies would come like flies
Are you minding her with her mumu talk. Women that have money are even worse, they’re the ones that wants a guy that has money the most.
Iyaebe: Okay keep your money in your pocket and don't spend it on women and let women close their legs too. Let's see if erection will let you rest. Stop downplaying sex,men cannot live without sex while women can live their whole life without it.So its a great favour whether you accept it or not.
I usually don’t do this but this is a very STUPID comment. Women can do without sex while men cannot. Very STUPID and naive statement
virginprincess: If she doesn't call you call her, it as simple as that or you buy her airtime for her to call you, i personally can stay a month without calling anybody maybe she's that type of person.
Without looking at the gender, the moment i saw this fish brain comment I knew it must be a girl
Omihanifa: Let me tell you the truth from personal experience, the girl doesn't love you. She's just catching cruise. When you no get bar again, or you can't meet up with her needs she will leave you and move on to the next tree way get enough bananas.
One of the easiest ways to even know if a girl is into you is through phone calls or chats. When you see a girl calling you repeatedly asking you if you don chop, good morning, good evening etc it simply shows she likes you.
As for this one that you say is your babe and she doesn't call you, you better dump her
Very right! A girl that loves u will always call. Even if i meet a girl fresh fresh and she misses my call and didn’t call or text back, I delete her number instantly. That’s the standard I’ve set for myself. Bad relationships is simply as a result of taking bullshit from onset and trust me bullshit will only generate to something worse and unbearable overtime. Hence the best thing is to curb it from the start even if its difficult
I met this girl sometimes in 2018. She was living with her aunt who was not being nice, and early 2020 she returned to her mom. Im fact it was so terrible that and she survived several abuses from her aunt's husband, which she told me. I was actually the main force behind her eventual liberation and relocation to her mom. We've been together all through.
Then, mid this year, things went rough with her mom, and the poor woman returned to the village. Then she landed with this family friend of theirs(not related, but their mothers are old friends). This family lives a stone throw to her mom's place.
She's told me before she joined this family how their last son was troubling her for a date, but she has been refusing. Then mid this year she moves in with same family. It is a family of 3 boys. She would always be the one cooking for the family. Sometimes, she would have to cook and wash for the same boy and take food it to his house (which is a short distance from d family house). It did not stop there, anytime they are broke, the mother would send her to go and beg the same guy for money (teasing her that she has a way of collecting money from her son).
If I had d means I'd have also gotten an apartment so we could have more time together, but things neva set..I dey hustle nor be say I lazy, but soon sha God go perfect am.
I know what and what could have happened in all this drama but I want to gear from my agbas in the building - how should I go about this matter. Thank u.
Don't worry u can yab me
Three questions for you before I proceed.
1. Do you stay with ur parents ? 2. Does your hustle generate monthly income? 3. When last did u see her and where?
I met this girl sometimes in 2018. She was living with her aunt who was not being nice, and early 2020 she returned to her mom. Im fact it was so terrible that and she survived several abuses from her aunt's husband, which she told me. I was actually the main force behind her eventual liberation and relocation to her mom. We've been together all through.
Then, mid this year, things went rough with her mom, and the poor woman returned to the village. Then she landed with this family friend of theirs(not related, but their mothers are old friends). This family lives a stone throw to her mom's place.
She's told me before she joined this family how their last son was troubling her for a date, but she has been refusing. Then mid this year she moves in with same family. It is a family of 3 boys. She would always be the one cooking for the family. Sometimes, she would have to cook and wash for the same boy and take food it to his house (which is a short distance from d family house). It did not stop there, anytime they are broke, the mother would send her to go and beg the same guy for money (teasing her that she has a way of collecting money from her son).
If I had d means I'd have also gotten an apartment so we could have more time together, but things neva set..I dey hustle nor be say I lazy, but soon sha God go perfect am.
I know what and what could have happened in all this drama but I want to gear from my agbas in the building - how should I go about this matter. Thank u.
Don't worry u can yab me
Three questions for you before I proceed.
1. Do you stay with ur parents ? 3. Does your hustle generate monthly income?
Malory: Can you imagine. If she truly loves you more than the guy nothing will make her remove your photos from the background. As for you saying you don't want to look like a heartbreaker, Don't let her blackmail you emotionally. Women are good at manipulating men. They will be the cause of a problem but will turn around and start crying and playing the victim. Toughen up
That one pain you, women will even be cheating and be accussing their bf or husband of cheating because they weren’t caught lolss
Malory: They have been doing it already. Forget long story
Honestly, that’s the sad truth. I really will not blame the girl sha, financial incapacitation makes women vulnerable. The girl needs to date someone who can be there financially and also provide shelter so it’s inevitable the family friend son will sleep with her and she will leave the bf eventually
soundOsonic: I met a lady last year, we talked well and vibed well. Later on I would go to her shop to discuss and I would have this eye contact with her and I thought I felt something like a spark though. Even the Lady with her suspected we had a thing together but I just recently knew her. We both talked as if we know each otherfor like forever.
She asked me for my number, I gave her. I never asked her for her number simply because I wanted to make sure that the signal we are getting from each other was purely romantic and not platonic and I wanted to take things slow.
I felt that her asking for my number was that she needed to spend more time with me if I am not available physically. So we started chatting. The chats was going smoothly and to my surprise we do chat all through the day we literally chats all hours of the day. Then I did what all single Hot guy will do, out but apart from the Hot which I am not most times; I asked her out. I was not after sex perse I just wanted enough closure bridging through the platonic platform to a more romantic setting.
But she replied with this exact same words "I am not ready for a relationship, I want to complete my schooling and be focus with my education."
Well despite her reply killed my envisioned sun setting romantic bliss; I understood as she was a good girl, a virgin and someone very focus with academics. I know this because she tells me everything about her things happening each day, minutes and seconds.
I was contented with the platonic relationship, I thought I would wait maybe 2 or 3 years as that's what she was indirectly telling me. A month later from the time I asked her out and was turned down, that time was December: Christmas period. I took my sister out to a nice eatery and I asked her if she could come along as a friend. She obliged but told me she would be going some place after that I said ok.
So after she left to her place of wherever. My sister told me she is worried, I asked her why, she said she went to her guy's place. I was shocked this is a lady that is not ready for relationship. This guy in question is a Yahoo guy by the appearance and all. The guy later broke her heart as that's the first time she is dating I think at 21. Another guy in the area too was like dating her as well after that guy, at the point of dating he got another girl pregnant and broke her heart (same Yahoo guy).
I thought why did she ever chose not to date me. If at all you were not physically attracted to me why didn't you just tell me instead of all these mumbo jumbo. I am actually an average looking guy. Maybe a 6 or even a 7 based on world standard.
My question is why do girls always refuse to date me, I am not a good guy neither am I a bad guy. The one I am asking out says I am not in her level, that she is in a very low level for me to look at her or ask her out. She believes I am after sex.
The next one said I am too low for her. Though she was older. The one I confessed my feelings for her heart isn't even with me but another but she started catching feelings but sometimes she gets to her senses and she convince herself she belongs with another.
The girl who I don't even know that keeps greeting me Everytime but I keep ignoring her, I later went for her after a year she turned me down. I just tire o.
Edit: Not every woman I meet, I ask out. I have a particular type of lady I ask out that depicts my taste. Any Lady beyond or below I show zero interest.
People saying I should move on, I have already. I was never pained o. And those calling me a simp I no even understand, where did you read any simpish move from me? Or do you at all know what SIMP is? My problem isn't sex o. If I wanted sex I would get it easily from those low class street girls without spending a dime. I am after my kind of girls but they are saying NO.
Stop toasting women. You will Bleep more women without toasting. Only the real OGs will understand this
metalgear11: We have been inseparable ever since. I realized I cared for her more and more every day, and though we’ve only had sex thrice in the two months since that first time, each of those times seem to have brought us much closer. I won’t lie, I’m happy I have her again, but every now and then I find my mind judging me. I wonder why I allowed her back into my heart. Agreed, she is a different person now, and she is much more mature, loving, and caring - things I will always hold dear - but the thought of her with my brother still floats around in my mind and makes me wonder what I’m doing. I try to hide my struggling conscience when we are together, as the happiness in her eyes and manner always makes me feel guilty that I harbor such thoughts in my head. On the other hand, I don’t want to let her go and lose her again, and this two-mindedness bothers me a lot.
Last weekend I took a trip to talk about it with my former roommate (whom I mentioned earlier is also here in Canada, but in a different province), and though he was surprised to hear that Yewande and I reconnected, he told me to follow my heart. I told him my heart is the problem – deep down I know I still want her and I’m happy I have her again, but I can’t seem to get past what happened as it always creeps up in my mind. His wife told me that from what I had explained, and being a woman herself, she knows Yewande is truly repentant. Her behaviour shows that clearly – no girl will go to the extent she had gone. She told me everyone makes mistakes, and Yewande has clearly learned from hers. The only problem she sees that worries me is the whole issue started with my brother. If it were anyone else, she said, I would have forgiven her and taken her back without a second thought. She told me to give her another chance, as she does not see her recovering from the heartbreak if I abandon her after all the pain and agony she went through to reconcile with me. God had a reason to bring us back together, she concluded.
This is a tough one to be honest. A very tough one BUT my brother, life is short. Hence Happiness is key at all times. A changed person for good is better than an awaiting disaster of a person, therefore please take her back and start a family ASAP
Oh I see the picture clearer now. He deserves better. He actually dumped you and not the other way round like you made me believe. Forget the calling to ask you why you had to leave him, he doesn't want you anymore. I'm speaking his mind.
For me, I can't even date you talk more of saying I cheated on you. In a world of looking sexy on the street, pepper them gang and the rest, you'll now keep me from having sex? No na. Or do you pay his bills? Like do you cloth, house and feed him? What is that that you do for him that his mum or sister can't do for him? You should know better, he left you. You didn't leave him.
Will you want the same fate for him if he's your brother? You people have mind o, you're even bragging that you left him clueless and you don't give second chance, lol. Will the second chance change anything? Please allow him love whoever she is he cheated on you with. I'll have problem with him if he doesn't appreciate his newly found love more than he has ever thought of loving you.
God will provide you a simp and pray his family members will simp like him too cos I can't imagine you being dumped cos some people perceived you to have used juju to tie their son in the name of marriage.
Omo! High 5 bro! I followed your thread with this self acclaimed virgin girl and you finished work patapata. YOU DELIVERED knock out blow���It’s her audacity for me���Nonsense and Rubbish!
Break up with that girl and save yourself of future heart ache and depression. She is a cheating bastard with guts. Also, collect your phone back! I repeat collect your phone back. How do u collect it? Arrange for a meeting and snatch the phone from her. Do not ask her to give you!
chocolateme: it was not really a heartbreak, it was a mutual decision to part ways.. said he wants to be sure to know what he really wants while I do the same. Maybe to really ascertain if eventually we are going to end up together, to be sure it's not infatuation and all that exhaberances. It seems we were choking each other. We kinda needed a break. It's not because of any woman or man. But it was a crazy decision. I am already exhausted
I don’t mean to hurt u more but when a guy or lady says this, simply means they don’t want the relationship again and that’s their own way of saying it. Just move on, nothing helps to move on except TIME to be candid. Was he ur first bf? how long did u guys date?
chocolateme: It's been 3 months now but the feelings refused to wear off. Every attempt for distraction and positive mindedness plus deleting and blocking from all social media avenues all proved abortive.
I have observed that there is a Degree to feelings. Going to another state, sightseeing, swimming, gym, sports, movies, interactions with the opposite sex not necessarily having intimacy still did not change anything. Took a week of therapy and didn't remember him for a second. But after all said and done, here we are back to square one.
Days back,, absent mindedly stumbled upon a picture of his I never knew was there, guess what? My heart jumped into my stomach and kept beating faster, I deleted it immediately.
If there is any other thing I can do to get over this, I will do. Its really a torture and invasion in my peace if mind. Wondering if its possible to sue him for emotional unrest. I am already exhausted.
Speak with someone about it alot you’d get over it, don’t bottle up your emotions.
However, can u share what caused the heartbreak or what his excuses were?
WOMEN are ruthless, callous and immature whenever they do not want you again.
This is WHY I do not pity them when in crisis.
That girl is seeing and fucking someone else. The only reason she will come back to her senses and reality is, if the guy fall her hand bigtime!
So my advice for you is, LET GO OF HER totally and never call or reach out again. If she makes a u-turn to come back, she will be the one pulling the strings and you wouldn’t have to stress.
Find another babe and move on! If you deem your new babe better off to spend your forever, do not take that idiot back out of sentiment even if she comes back. Else na regret becoz gals like this have the 99% tendencies of repeating same and cheating in marriage. Enough said.
Money2000: Hello NLers... Sometimes ago, I was in dilemma to leave my loyal and faithful girlfriend... Guess what? I finally caught her cheating. She was double dating for 3 months (dating myself and one other guy).
I have dated this babe for 4 years, until I caught her cheating. I was so angry that I ended the relationship. I am in a new relationship anyway, but I can’t seem to find the friendship I had with my ex.
I sometimes feel I go extra miles to impress this new girl (not like she bills me, but I caught her one time receiving money gift from a guy, whom she claims that they are just friends, and that she would stop talking to him) although she appreciates every little thing I do. She has also been supportive.
My ex apologized and beg me to reconcile things with her, but I thought I love this new babe more than her... so I told her to move on. After like 2 months, she has finally moved on oh.
The problem now is that, I am beginning to miss my ex so much, the friendship we had, the mind blowing s*x and some other experience we had together, how we have helped each other grow in life financially (my ex was with me when I was broke and had nothing) P.S: my new gf is kind of boring in bed, her pre-intimacy game and s*x is nothing compared to my ex (I prefer my ex)...
These days, any small thing, I am dreaming of my ex, seeing her in my dream, which makes me very happy... but when I wake up to reality, I become sad because it’s just a dream.
I have taken this my new gf to family, and I’ve also met her family too...
Now, I am in a dilemma if to go beg my ex for reconciliation because I miss her so much... I think I have actually not moved on...
I need your advice pls
You should have continued dating her and this new babe to ascertain your exact decision. Most people here will tell you that the best decision was firing your ex immediately but trust me, real life circumstances differs and you might need to make some difficult decisions not necessarily accepted by many but if that’s what works for you and makes you happy. You can also always review your decision, it’s never too late to do anything at this our youthful age.
Finally, do not bother begging your ex to come back, that babe has moved on! Don’t go and ridicule yourself, except she was still calling or chatting you all this while, if not, just let her be! Once a woman stops calling, man! They have truly moved on, any attempt to force them back will end in ridicule and/or regret!
I told my wife that I don't wish to have another baby, because 3 is okay by me, but she insisted that she wants another baby, she has been on my neck for the past few days because of this issue.
We have 3 (three) beautiful babies already - 2 boys and a girl, which is ok for me. I ain't financially strong, and I don't want to bring any child into this world to suffer.
married and matured folks please help me out. Thanks
You did not marry your wife bros. Na anoda peson wife u marry
SilverNorGold: .. The cowardly DJ dun switch country.. Why not finish what you started? You evil DJ of destruction! The blood of all the innocent people killed as a result of your propaganda will haunt you for all eternity!
You and all the evil celebrities will pay dearly for this! You wanted fame so badly to the extent of sacrificing innocent lives to the Devil. Enjoy your fame.. But remember.. The wicked will never go Scot-free. God's judgment will locate and consume you all!
Nigeria must be great. Whether you evil enemies of Nigeria like it or not!
Congrats you have succeeded in saying rubbish. So it was the celebs that invited Army and Policr to shoot. Congrats once again for saying trash
Neddstark: Below is a video of DJ Switch during the Endsars Saga before the shooting where she was as usual inciting the protests to go on. She actually said that there is nowhere in the world that change has taken place without sacrifice.. This failed artist was actually pushing people to still keep protesting and fighting the government, knowing it may end in blood. The only thing I salute about her is her bravery and that she was there untill the last minute unlike the rest of influencers who ran away knowing shit may hit the roof. Now she has seen how bad things can get, she has chosen to run. I thought she wanted sacrifice.
Please Nigerian youths, you cannot fight a government. Nigeria is not Peru, where a president will resign over a protest. Even calm GEJ will never do it. However, you can only change a government through your PVC. Come 2023 let us form a strong youth force that can put in better candidates than the ones there is. Any insurrection against the government will always be met with force. And in this part of the world force is always brutal, look at what happened in Oyigbo, Rivers state. Let us be wise. Anarchy will definitely not pay us.
For those as usual who want to insult and rain curses on me, go and continue protesting endsars in front of police stations.
Romance › Re: I Am Scared To Ask Him When He Wants To Get Married. Help!!! by instinct57vm(m): 5:06am On Dec 10, 2021
.. The cowardly DJ dun switch country.. Why not finish what you started? You evil DJ of destruction! The blood of all the innocent people killed as a result of your propaganda will haunt you for all eternity!