₦airaland Forum

KanwuliaExtra:
You must be :

1. Very lucky
2. Very naive
3. NEVER BEEN MARRIED



Marriage is divine huhn?
Glad to have this “revelation”.
Extremely “refreshing”.

Make sure your spouse-to-be is a “DIVINITY” o!

oh yea!!!
maybe you're:
a)unlucky
b)experienced (in getting it wrong)
c)married before and divorced!
marriage is divine... sure! did you create yourself?
how did the "idea" to come together as man and wife come into existence?
and I dated my wife for 8 years before getting married 15 years ago!
let me tell you something important... we've both made mistakes on lots of things that spring up when two people come to live together, some are quite very upsetting some very ridiculous some others very necessary.
...and we move on knowing that all this are bound to occur ..
of course we seek ways to also avoid the situations that may cause disaffections knowing these lead to breakdown in relationship!
every marriage is unique in it's character depending on the couple's approach!

IAMSASHY:
ladies listen, u hv so many guys, both black and white physically around u, y wud u take such a risky risk to travel jst 2 see a stranger? Some ladies embarked on such journey and neva made it bak alive. If u hvnt trust d physical guys around u, hw den do tink u cn trust a stranger? . Sumone may say Dat some ladies met dia husbands online, fine, but dey did bt do u no hw many guys she has met online, visited and dey al ended up disappointing her b4 she actually met her man? Wat if u take such route bt wsnt as lucky as she is and neva made it bak alive? If u ar nt wise, u wl always b used.

good advice!
let me add that if there should be any travelling it's a guy's duty to come to you rather than the other way round. how busy is he? should you be the one to stake your pride and value for an unknown entity? think he will add any value to you? don't be ridiculous
unfortunately ladies won't listen.

EfemenaXY:
Now this, I can relate to.

Year 0 - 5: Honeymoon stage. You made the absolute right choice. Hardly any arguments. You can't seem to get enough of each other.
Sex drive: "abnormally" high (depending on the number of kids you already have).

Year 5 - 15: "Scales" have fallen (a few years and a couple of kids later) arguments do erupt. Heated ones. You almost even dislike your spouse for not seeing things YOUR WAY. You're almost always at loggerheads because of your very different outlook, approach to handling certain situations, etc. You think you start seeing things crystal clear and even start wondering why you ever got hitched in the first place especially as your background / upbringing seem poles apart. At this stage all you seem to see are differences, Differences, and more DIFFERENCES between you both. Stretched finances. Never enough money. Careers sacrificed or kept on hold to raise kids. Frustration and feeling "I'm better than this!"
Sex drive: very cool. Almost cold.

Year 15 - 20: Arguments are few and far between. Kids are grown and start heading off to uni. (yay!) A bit more spare Finance in the family pot. Done having kids. Previously dormant careers kick-started. Less pressure (apart from dealing with stroppy teenagers). You understand each other sooooooo much better. You're much more mature, you look back at yester years and understand how you could have done things differently. You see now (well almost), that what seemed such a big deal back THEN isn't really NOW.

Year 20+: You've grown into the marriage and each other. Once again you suddenly look forward to doing simple things together again every evening. Watching tv, having meals out, etc. Basically spending more family time together. You can't wait for all your kids to fly the nest.

fine analysis... 90% correct reason I say so is each couple who try to find how to circumnavigate situations have no "scales" falling cos you already know you won't always have it smooth!!
I courted 8 years and currently in 15th year of marriage... and I meant from the first toasting that I was only interested in getting married so I was focussed on it rather than seeking "alternatives" when there was any friction in our relationship.
I think the marriage will sail if we don't make comparisons or peep over the fence!!

thefirst:
Most people change for the worse!

Could this have an underlying cause?

yes there's always a cause for change!
when one expects too much to come to him or her without working out a plan to achieve wit input then the disappointment leads to change...mostly negatively!
selfish aims and objectives unmet brings change for the worse!

KanwuliaExtra:
The GREATEST challenge is MARRIAGE itself.
Reason? MOST PEOPLE CHANGE FOR THE WORSE!
To stay na WAHALA.
To comot na HEAVY WAHALA o!

Better to die h-insai ONE marriage o, than to make the same mistake TWICE or THRICE.
Can’t imagine getting married again.
Will never try it.
You can NEVER know what is in the other person’s mind. So many dishonest people out there with lots of baggage ooooo.

They say one thing, mean another and DO NEITHER!

No need to inherit another set of emotional/financial PLUS MEDICAL RISKS, all in the name of looking for love, peace and happiness. Tufiakwa!!!!

Na real GAME OF WOES I swear!!!!


Glad to have tried it.

It is a very expensive education process.
You MUST find happiness within YOURSELF.
Simple.

oh dear! you have really set the situation spinning on it's head!
first I think motive matters. what's your desire and motive for getting married? affection or just to have someone wash cook and incubate and rear YOUR children?
what's the first reason that attracted you to the man? love? or because you needed to leave your parents home or cos your mates are married and you're getting older? your conscious conscience is your ultimate judge.
marriage is "overrated" cos most people you see closely are those who failed to see that marriage is an EMPTY box which each individual puts something into!
most folks expect marriage to put something into them it can't work that way.
if you courted, how long? what were your "expectations" of your partner? were u just being swept away without realizing that there are days the ship shouldn't sail or wouldn't sail? each individual is unique therefore no two marriages are alike!
before you signed the dotted lines did you really take time to see how people sort issues out or did you think yours will never have issues?
marriage is divine(you can contest that) therefore you must align your mind with the instructions of the One who brought this institution to existence else you're sure to miss the mark.
you will wake to see the same face daily and you can be sure the mood that went to sleep last night won't be the same that woke this morning!
if you anticipate danger or inconveniences won't you plan to deal with it?
now take your time to study your partner and discard people's"perfect" opinions first then find the formula that fits yours....and I can tell you it's gonna take years to achieve that!

9jakohai:
Good....but I am waiting for the competition for

BEST IGBO GIRL IN MATHEMATICS

BEST IGBO GIRL IN ENGLISH

BEST IGBO GIRL IN IGBO LANGUAGE AND CUSTOMS

best IGBO LADY INVENTOR

Then we can have another heroine worth celebrating

now you're talking!!
all these ones here only know about hairdo weaveon nails attachments lipsticks etc...ask them if they've heard about the G8, dem go begin get glazed eyes!! you will be surprised they're all in "higher institution"!!!

YNWA!! our blood is red ...victory is ours!!

IAMSASHY:
Kanda

this is SE pronunciation of the Hausa word "GANDA"

it's time the mother does some research and investigation around and within!
OP ask the mother about the kind of movies or soap operas she the mum watches. I say so cos many women have allowed their reasoning to be washed away just by being glued to this explicit love movies that don't help anyone!
who does the child keep company with and what words are usually heard from the little girl's mouth? music and music videos too should be investigated. it won't be long before answers will spring forth!
explain to the mum that she herself must not deny if she's found wanting and must take the blame to enable progress be made!
the girl should not be corporally punished if it's established that she's involved in any molestation else the situation will degenerate in a few year's time.
the girl will need a psychological assessment.
then if all this investigation clears her then medical help is required! good luck

EricIyke:
LOL
Brother they ain't new, if this is the first time you're hearing about this case, then you've not been following.
They've been dragging Buhari,Obiano,Buratai and several others around.
This new case really has a lot of damages on Nigerias sovereignty.
There address is online.
Use Google.
There mails are there too what else?

been following bro...just observing!

the law office doesn't have an address
the write up lacks legal language and filled with a landmine of spelling mistakes ...
maybe the OP should ask them to rewrite it properly.

Tamass:
Maybe i wasnt clear enough bro or you misunderstood me...i hate kidnappers and they deserve whatever they get..what i was driving at was that a criminal should be treated as one without attaching preference to the status of the individual

that's ok. I think i understand your standpoint
let's all fight crime to rid our society of evil people!

Tamass:
Quite alright i get your point...but is evans not a kidnapper? why wasnt he killed immediately?
get it straight bro...the rich are given preferential treatment

You're right bro...
But if you're kidnap victim I'm sure your comments will not be as you made them above!

Evestar200:
Niger Tornadoes all the way.
And OP the winner gets 25m not 10m

up tornadoes!! I dey wait for minna to follow lift the trophy oooo!!

OP,
I feel you should have thrown the floor open to both male and female...not just females.
unless you want us to believe that only women suffer sexual harassment thereby implying that men are the ONLY ones capable of harassing women!

oh! what a nation we live in! just because Kaduna is singled out it has given fodder to some people to fire from all cylinders thinking their region is better off!
let's be honest if your education is fine it means you're lucky to have natural intelligence not that you're taught in any public or private school in Nigeria.
as a man about town it's obvious that illiteracy is found in all corners of Nigeria. lack of exposure also has made lots of our graduated students victims of false notions that their education supercedes what's obtained anywhere in Nigeria. the SE and SS are as illiterate as those in the N and NE and W and SW!
travel and see!
some graduates I once traveled with exposed their ignorance as we journeyed from the north to eastern Nigeria and I laughed when they claimed the northerners are illiterate!
here on nairaland it's so easy to spot the true levels of people's literacy and exposure just by reading through their comments!
before you remove the speck in someone else's eye please remove the plank in yours!

KAYCEEJUNIOR:
Even thou am not perfect but the myopic reasoning and discussion of many of my Igbo brothers especially the ones into trading makes me believe that illiteracy is really a disease. I don't care how many that will mention me but I really have to say the truth, if you all doubt it enter market where they will be discussing about the state of affairs and you will be wondering wether you came from another planet, if you mistakenly meet them discussing about Biafra, you will be so ashamed, one will be like "Nnamdi Kanu have written to USA and Russia, that Triump have given Buhari 3days to grant Biafra Referendum, the other will be like..... American troops are in South East as we speak and they came in with their submarine waiting for Nigerian Soldiers to come to Kanu home so that they will unleash war.

What rubbish, and funny enough, these guys have Internet enabled phone and they browse daily, how they get the news are something that will even make you check your phone to know if it is a recent breaking news. Just imagine a humanitarian assistance and some low brain dafts tagged it to monkey pox even took it to school, What if there is stampede?
We really need to talk to ourselves not just by fighting for freedom which is our right but also check out our level of reasoning.
My name is Charles Emeka from Umueri in Anambra state.

well said! it's really unfortunate that people do not use their internet enabled phones for good purpose! most have turned it to an instrument to spread their ignorance and crassness! in truth how many watch CNN or al Jazeera or BBC to know the state of the world? they rather watch nollywood just to laugh at the comedy!
I saw the way the issues surrounding Biafra swayed Easterners since 2001 when I served in ebonyi. the Biafra preaching papers wrote about how Israel was going to send troops gunships and atomic bombs to aid the cause and hundreds bought the idea and each day they bought this newspapers to update themselves!! then I knew how gullible these guys could be!

IamKashyBaby:


Woooah! How old is her child? Why she was mute for 3yrs if she was being molested by their pastor?

that's the question we need answers for!!!
why the 3 year silence? if it was wrong for the pastor to mess around with her daughter after 3 years then it was wrong from the first day!

Very heartwarming to read this ...I'm in bed with my lovely wife and I'm gonna hold her tight and squeeze her and what comes after is left to your imagination OP. Thanks, married guys the ball is in your court!

DanielsParker:
"I see him everyday". This is present continuous .

what if you usually see him everyday but not anymore?

can you express that in a past tense?

yea...
under both contexts you're right but if you listen carefully to many people they tend to mean "I see him everyday" (present continuous) by saying "I use(d) to see him everyday"

konkobility:
i'm is just an abbrevation for I AM

noted. but I meant people tend to say or write "am" for 'I'm" or "I am".

agbonkamen:
Who cares All men cheat I repeat all men cheat..... With their bend penisular

I'm only being sacarstic but I think women do also but always deny it!

Ramanto:
So educative. Op, help me consider these two statements: "original copy submitted by I, John" and "original copy submitted by me, john" thanks

let me help:
"original copy submitted by me.
(then you sign off with your name signature and date)

nowadays "am" has replaced "i'm"!
it's absolutely wrong to write "am fine" rather it's "I'm fine"
same also for "I use(d) to see him everyday" rather it's "I see him everyday"
"I used to use baking powder for ...." rather it's "I use baking powder for...."
more from others please...
thanks op for brightening my grammar this Saturday morning!

zainmaxwell:
hmm nice list u got there.. try evanescence missing you will love the song

wow!!! what a song!
it actually has a similar story to daffodil lament by the cranberries!! I could just cry listening to that song! choi!! oh how much that song moved me!

oh Lord! if only they recognize it when it's given to them in purity! hearts will have peace!
unfortunate that soooo many ladies can't see it cos they think the grass is greener only on the other side!
someone said marriage relationship is an empty box and to fill it you must PUT IN...not TAKE OUT!
it can only work if the couple not just gaze into their own eyes but also look towards the same horizon!

Are you ready for love by Elton John daffodil lament by the cranberries (very sad love song...really sad!) Romeo and Juliet by Dire Straits. lots of others...

na wa o! if the same lawyer is given the chance to write the speech for the President I'm sure he will still come out to say it was filled with deep loathing for the igbos!
buhari sneezes it means hatred for igbos
buhari coughs it means disdain for igbos
buhari sleeps it means hostility for igbos
buhari showers it means dark plans for igbos!
no one lives forever so let him be...soon enough you will get your chance to prove yourselves but definitely not with the kind of Igbo leaders I see now....let's wait 1000 years!

AmoryBlacq:
Friendship should have boundaries!

from what I read this is a promising sexual relationship in its latent!

You got to understand that women are very deceptive and cunning, better flee now before you find yourself in an entanglement of problems laced with disaster!

She wants to come cook for you - what sort of B.S is that?

verdict: tell her you need her husband's permission especially with her coming to your place ( never bring her to your house man) and watch her disappear!

you never know wit women
let me say you took the words right out of my mouth.
last word is: once caught she will deny you and tell everyone you lured her! ask Joseph while in Potiphars house in Egypt!
sorry ladies I had to be firm here!

minna is peaceful as always . .one nigeria! peace to my neighborhood... peace to the nation and the world!

what I can't understand is the lawyer saying the army "were shooting into his house for close to 40 minutes..."
question: was there any resistance from kanu or his BSS?
how large was the "war zone" that the military couldn't gain access and took 40 minutes?
seriously just need answer to the two questions ...

oh Lord! some of the stories are so funny yet I shed a tear for some of you! why? I can imagine the trauma you all faced! I had mine too and patiently waited for the chance...it came when I was 22 and since then I've grown up MY way! no regrets though cos it helped me find my way in this world! no regrets however!
oh, let me say this: hope we learn that when we have kids not to destroy them emotionally and with the cane!