Hmmmmmmm, my man u sabi lagos no be small. You must have been driving for decades. thanks for the compilation but please add the aspect of "wetin you carry" at unexpected spots, adding to the hold-up and adding to the stress and accidents, as vehicles bump into one another.

I have seen couples who met at their working places. I dont think there is anything wrong with it, as long as the two involved are single and matured. Matured enough to allow other colleagues relate with their partner without any suspicion. Matured enough to separate romance from official duties. Matured enough to always know where to thrash out their differences- after work hours.

But the most important thing is that anyone that wishes to be involved in office romance should set his/her goal right. is it for fun, a serious affair, a trial relationship or a fling? And the partner must be carried along, so that if there is a need to discontinue, they will know how to handle it.

Tufiakwa! Abomination! I refuse to talk,

I wonder if that is really possible. I hate the activities of the cultists but i have since discovered that it may be difficult, if not impossible to eradicate it. Nevertheless, it can be reduced to the barest minimum. If the following are done

1. Eradicate or curtail the activities of all cults like the Ogboni fraternity, Armoc, etc This is necessary because we can not tell the children to stop it, when their parents indulge in it. There should be a law banning all of them.

2. Make it a law to be criminal for any lecturer to be a cultist. Any known cultist lecturer should be sacked

3. Treat cult members among students as armed robbers and assasins. The cultists use arms and they cause destruction, so they should be handled with very severe punishment. Anyone that kills should be killed and anyone that maims should be jailed. It is not sufficient to just rusticate them or expel them from the institutions. They should face the full brunt of the law.

4. There should be a very serious awareness programme talking about the ills of cultism and the punishment for it. The way HIV/AIDS campaign has been reinforced, is they way we need to tackle cultism. I am sure the originator of cultism is now regreting ever starting the idea because hoodlums have hijacked his intentions.

5. A high-powered espionage should be carried out on all campuses and government offices to flush cultists out. They meet on land, not in the air, some even announce their meetings. They should all be smoked out and made to face the law.

If we can be sincere about these proposals, cultism will be reduced to the barest minimum. It is seen as a statua symbol now, so some students are enticed with that but by the time we make it look as a plague, that it is, everyone will flee from it.

June 29 is the day ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Anyone in the house?

Well, am not a single father but i just feel i may be able to chip in some pices of advice when necessary. But if you dont mind, can we start from the very begining. That is to say, do you mind telling us how you got into the state of being a single mother. this could help people when they want to profer solutions.

Well, i think the thread has tried. Don't you think so? It is supposed to be an introductory thread and it has lingered this far. Anyway, i think all of the above is responsible for the crawling of the thread but you can change the story, you know. So over to you.

olabowale:

@ The poster:

If you want to a good relation with your bank Officer, you may sit with them, to discuss investment strategy with them about
your deposit. You can restrict them to what type of investment that they can engage in, with your money. Anything unIslam
should be ruled of of the potential portfolio, eg, Alcoholic, Tobacco, firearms, gambling, all kinds of businesses that the Qur'an
and hadith restrict muslims to be involved in.

How possible is this? How will they single out your money, especially when you are not there? i dont think it is practical. They have a pool of funds and they disburse money from the pool for any purpose.

Bolarge says:
Something tells me your man has already done a better/more objective analysis of the situation than you have and doesn't exactly see a future. Sorry, but that's how I see it. I may be wrong. This will explain why he's not exactly keen on investing in the relationship the way you are.

Way forward:
Dearie start thinking with your head rather than your heart. Anything above 2 contraindications to a relationship is a red alert. Ignore it to your own peril.
Sit him down and table everything before him matter-of-factly.
Take note of everything he says and use your womanly instincts to read between the lines.

Hhmmmmm. Truth is bitter. But bitter pills often give the desired relief.

Welcome baby. But try and smoke out cute ass so that you wont feel lonely on the thread. Enjoy yourself.

I think there are two ways to it. there are genuine needy and there are lazy needy among the beggars. The genuine needy are either handicapped or have some hindering deformities that make working almost impossible whereas you see some other ones who are complete, agile and strong but LAZY.

I think one should help the genuine needy, especially the seriously disabled and the old and frail/sick. but i vehemently frown at giving alms to some lazy boys and girls pr man and woman. To them, begging is a profession, so they should sweat to earn that living just like other hardworking people sweat.

But it will be good if Government can do something about it. If it is not checked, it will spread poverty and manace on the streets.

Well, many posts before me have already offered useful advice and i think you should take it. You have not been confirmed at your working place, so taking a loan may not be easy, either from your employer or from the bank. but it is not even good living on loans, especially when the loan is not to be invested. Renting an accommodation to live in, is not an investment.

Manage for the next few months, then take a room. Do not despise the days of little begining. As you settle down and get your ICAN, your market value will increase and you will get a better job and your standard of living too will improve. Remember, Rome was not built in a day. i agree with earlier posts that N180k is too much to spend on accommodation when you are still struggling to stand. Stand well, and you can get any accommodation you want. All the best.

In as much as i want us to look at the working condition of the maids or househelps in Nigeria, i also want us to examine the causes of such ill treatment.

1. Why do they become househelps? People may rush to say poverty, but is poverty really the cause? Some parents ar truely poor but if they give birth to just one or two children, they would still have been able to cater for them in their poor status. but what do you see? the poor usually have 5 to 8 children. So they either send them to family members or turn them to househelps. so parents are sometimes the cause.

2. Another thing, parents send them off as househelps and they negotiate the pay. May be because they are desperate for money or because they are not aware of how much the agents charge the Ogas, they end up getting their children underpaid.

3. Like i said in some other threads, some employers of maids have learnt their lessons. They now know that if you dont take care of your maid and you leave your children with her/him, she/he will not take good care of your children. He/she will retaliate. nevertheless, some still havent learnt their lessons. they still maltreat maids, so for those ones, and the shylock agents, there is a need to make law to standardise the maids labour market.

4. That is where the government comes in. Government needs to fulfil its obligation to the society. Even now, it is becoming difficult for an average Nigerian to send their children to school. How then will they thinlk of sending a maid to school. it costs so much that the family is just mnanaging to educate their own children. So they wont be able to help the maid.

Laws should be in place to regulate child labour and that will cover street trading and the use of children as beggars. Some parents do that when they dont want to send their children to be househelp but this is even bad. it exposes children to many dangers.

almondjoy:

Yes! We are all guilty in enabling that kind of menace because if you look in almost every household in Nigeria you will find out that there is a slave worker hiding in the back room somewhere, including yours romeo! So come off your high horse. Are your parents breaking their own firewood, fetching their own water or cooking their own food in the village or wherever they live?

Hmmm, good question? Let me add another one. Will he also wash his car when he comes home? No, i dont think he will. he will be too big to do that. So he will need a "domestic worker" to do that for him. But how much do you think he is going to pay that "domestic worker"? Well, it doesnt matter even if the so called domestic worker is on part time basis till he leaves for espa, It doesnt also matter if the "domestic worker" is the child of his next door neighbour in the village. the fact is that he will do the dirty job that the Oga from abroad can not do. Well, he will be magnanimous to give the "domestic worker" N100.00 because it looks so much valuable in his village. But he will not see it as slavery because the "domestic worker" does not live with him and is on part time basis.

Hmmmmmmmmmmm, i hold my peace!

ella.b:

hello people.really missed u guys.

Ella.b, where have you been? is it the pressure of end of the year work or pressure of academics? Well, whichever, take it easy o. Do find time to ease off pressure. You are welcome. we sure missed you too. So any fresh gist from for the home?

Hmmmmmmm, Opokonwa must hear this. Am on my way to find him. BRB.

@mamaput

A houseboy in Germany gets minimum 7 € an hour
7€ times 8 hours= 56 a day
times 5 day a week because he must have 2 day off is 280 € a week
Times 4 weeks is1120€ a month
that is without extras like extra hours or working on sundays. or at night.
if he works on christmaChristmasic holiday its double pay.
we are talking of housboy that did not go to school

Mamaput, how much does a graduate earn in Germany and how much does a graduate earn in Nigeria? What class does a graduate belong to in Germany A, B, C, D, or E and say the truth what class do most graduates belong to in Nigeria? When you begin to see it this way, you will understand that the lack of self esteem and d degradation suffered by the "maids" is not limited to maids. The problem runs across the whole labour market.

You will also notice that if you start calling them domestic workers, henceforth, it still doesnt change their plights. So what is all the fuss about what they are called.

I am glad that Almondjoy and Davidylan have really gone indepth to examine the situation and in a way have agreed in origin of the problem- the government. So rather than blaming those who engage the services of "maids" and cursing them and raining abuses on them like some have done, why cant the aggrieved just find a way of penetrating the law makers and make them come up with laws that will address that area. That is the only time i can consider their efforts as meaningful and sensible. Abuses and flagrant display of arrogance wont help the situation.

He who has ears let him hear!

Dont worry, when Oyinbo man is through with using you as houseboy wherever you are now, we will find an old woman that will use you as a houseboy in Nigeria. When you are one, you can now come with your theory, form a union of house maids and then fight for your right. For now, i leave you with your fate as Oyinbo man's houseboy.

Zoooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooommmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

It is therefore confirmed then that "Behind every successful man, there is a woman" and aslo that "The hands that rock the craddle rules the world". My brother, respect and fear women o. Anyway, on which thread are you usually found? Atleast if we cant relate much on this thread, we can on other threads.

I still insist that "Maids" in Nigeria are not slaves. It is just like the case of the six blind men who went to know what an elephant is. Each one described it based on the side of the elephant that he touched. So each one has described a maid based on his/her experience and exposure to maids. So i will quote another easonable post on this thread,

almondjoy:

Why are you guys so hung up on this word "maid"? Domestic worker/maid/servant/housegirl are all the same things because the job description is the same. We might not like the terminologies, but face it guys same meaning.

Revive:

Nigerian situation of “MAID” is slavery period.

What about the situation of the so called “Ogas” who will have young boys serve them at home and in business like a slave and at the end will not even settle them?

Romeo, u do not have to argue with any body who neither wants to learn nor be enlightened.

Nigerian “maids” employed? Haba some people need to wake up!

How many Nigerian maids are taken to the hospital when they are sick. The highest most of them get is 'mixed medicines' from pathent (“chemist”) shops. When sick they still have to do the house cores. Some are also beaten up with slashes of cane even when they are sick.
How many Nigerian maids have their hair taken care of?
On Sundays the oga, madam and the ones they gave birth to dress up and go to church while the maid may have to stay back to clean the house and cook for them.
How many Nigerian maids can easily go to visit their own family? These children (called maid) are denied the need to visite and see their own family when they want.
How many Nigerian maids can eat what they feel like eating. The rest of the family where the maid is in have the right to choose what they want to eat but the maid does not have this right.
How many Nigerian maids can comfortably sit on the living room sit and watch television ? How many of them take their meal on the dinning table?
How many Nigerian maids attend decent school? Not to talk of going to university. Most of them can not speak good English in a country where English is the official language, yet it is not because they are not smart but because they were not given the opportunity to have a proper education. The list goes. Tell any of these families that they are maltreating their "maid" they tell u that it does not concern u.

If jintujinta concludes that u are a “maid” in Europe just because u are highlighting the horrible situation of the “maids” in Nigeria, just ignore it. Such a conclusion does not change u from being what u are.

And if I may ask jintujinta, as u know it without doubts that a “maid/domestic” servant in Europe can go online as much as he/she wants, how many nigerian “maid” know how to use computer not to talk of possibly going online? Yet u say Nigerian “maids” are employed.

Let us call a spade a spade. It is very bad to enslave these kids just because they come from a ‘less priviledged’ background. Lets be honest, how many of us would be able to go through what these “maids” are going through just for one week? I do not like unreasonable arguments. If u have been doing something out of ignorant, then change as soon as u got to know.

Besides “maid” can stand for different meanings just like “light” for e.g. can stand for different meanings. For instance “light” (as in not heavy) and “light” as in (what u use to see at night). There are so many words that have more than one meaning. As far as the "Nigerian maid" is concerned we all know the meaning. We don’t need a dictionary for that.

If there is a need to open a dictionary here, I think jintujinta should be looking up the meaning of "employed"

I dont know the time you left Nigeria and i dont know the kind of people you interacted with but one thing i know is that you have a wrong view of "maids" in Nigeria. Just like some employers in real companies dont treat their staff well and others treat them well, same way therer are families who dont treat "maids" well and there are others who treat them like thier sisters or brothers. Till you get to another man's farm , you will think your father's farm is the largest.

You people should interact with people who have human feelings and you will know that not all "maids" are ill treated. It is obvious that many of you are not ready to learn. The ignorance you push to others, stink so much around you. Try and associate with real people and know that not all familioes are heartless as you want the nairalanders to believe.

mamaput:

respect elders? did you not just call his people slaves there are parts of the world that even a 14 year old boy will kill you for this statement.

This forum is full of very young people we the few old ones are on their territory so we act like visitors.
respect only to those that give it,
what will you say if Seun bans you he about 23 .

romeo is right in everything he says and to add to it, if you want to help keep the kids off the road, go and build an sos village for kids with your friends.

I dont know if you really want to be objective or biased but if you read well, you will see that he started abuses right from his first post on this thread. He also started it with me. My response was just to give him a dose of his pill.

When i see people rushing to call people names on this forum, it tells me one thing. they are immatured, weak and unaccommodating. That people dont share your views doen not mean you should abuse them. A wise man once said" Rudeness is a weak man's immitation of strength" So i know the depth of character of each from the way they respond to issues.

As for the ban, what do you think i care if anyone bans me for airing my views? Do i earn a living on nairaland? I just come around top kill time. I am a member of more matured forums, where other people's views are respected, and name calling is not the vogue.

This thin is very simple. The girl is still single not married. Does he have to wait till a broken heartwd girl comes around crying? Just make sure you are not bending her relationship only to just "chop and clean mouth". If you dont have plans for her, leave her and let her sort herself out in her present predicament.

@ Romeo
It is obvious that you are from the bush part of Nigeria and your generations must have been slaves before you left Nigeria. You are so blind to the first and last ( 1 & 5) definitions that are not arcaich and chose, in your myopic mind to stay glued to the ones tghat mentioned archaic. How foolish you are and how uncultured your mind is. Your selective perception and retention will be your doom. Be objective for once.

I guess you are are domestic worker in Spain. You better come home and find something worthwhile to do with your life, instead of washing dishes and clothes. Useless houseboy. You even chose to define what house maid means in Nihgerian context. Is that the way your parentys were used as housemaiids? Or is that the way they used their housemaids. Stop measuring every Nigherian with your useless background and coloured judgement.

Come home and mix with reasonable people so that they can cleanse you of your unreasonable past experience in Nigeria. And learn to respect your elders. Did your parents teach you that? What you don't have, you can't give though.

Where is everyone on this thread? Have you all abandoned me? Okay o. Anyway, i enjoyed your company you all. We had a nice time. I guess it was wonderful while it lasted. Hope to meet you all on other threads.

Since Romeo is so concerned about the househelp/housemaid/domestic worker case, let me ask him a question. Which is better: to have them do house maid or to have them beg on streets, where they get raped, impregnated and infected with diseases and hunger?

Dont make those who take housemaids look bad. They are not bad people. In fact, they are helping the society and the government. They are employing people.

If government fails in his responsibility, why should you blame people that are helping the situation? Besides, if we go to the roots of house maids, some parents are to blame because they give birth to children they cant take care of. So they send them as house maids. So why blame those who employ them?

@ Romeo
I think this guy romeo needs to be schooled before he gets lost in his spanish mentality. Below are the dictionary meanings of maid. Tell me what is derogatory in the way the poster has used it. Wake up boy and stop all that forming. Who are you forming for?

maid [mayd]
(plural maids)
noun
1. woman domestic worker: a female domestic employee such as one working in a hotel or tourist accommodations
2. young unmarried woman: a young unmarried woman (archaic or literary) (sometimes offensive)
3. unmarried woman: an unmarried woman past middle age (archaic or literary) (often offensive)
4. virgin: a woman who has never had sexual intercourse (archaic or literary)
5. woman servant: a female servant, especially one working in a large private house

Microsoft® Encarta® 2007. © 1993-2006 Microsoft Corporation. All rights reserved.

@vuctor4u
After all that long epistle of Victor to Bblak, i hope you were able to meet Bblak on Saturday. And i hope she has pardoned you. You really need o because as you don publicly declare for Bblak, other babes fit dey run o.

I just wonder why the poster is so bothered. Are we really sure that he, and not a tailor, is not responsible for the pregnancy? In this age of telecommunication, knowing what to do is very simple. Talk to your parents regularly and they will tell you what to do. Good enough, thjey call home often, so what are you bothering your head over?

@ifyalways
I hate sentiments. I dont like seeing all these "what if she's your sister, " or whatever. Was the girl raped? She should face the consequences of her follies. No one should organise any pity party and expect us to come and feast. Count me out. Everyone should be held responsible for his/her handiwork.

And for you who detest the name house maid, what is your problem? Wether you call her house maid or you call her domestic worker, what difference does it make? Is that the issues at stake? Is it not the same thing that they all do? Learn to address the thrust of the matter.

@Poster
Stop worrying your head. Leave the resolution of issues to your parents. Just keep them informed on developments at home, pending the time they return, and keep watch over the girl, whenever you are around.

I just wonder why the poster is so bothered. Are we really sure that he, and not a tailor, is not responsible for the pregnancy? In this age of telecommunication, knowing what to do is very simple. Talk to your parents regularly and they will tell you what to do. Good enough, thjey call home often, so what are you bothering your head over?

@ifyalways
I hate sentiments. I dont like seeing all these "what if she's your sister, " or whatever. Was the girl raped? She should face the consequences of her follies. No one should organise any pity party and expect us to come and feast. Count me out. Everyone should be held responsible for his/her handiwork.

And for you who detest the name house maid, what is your problem? Wether you call her house maid or you call her domestic worker, what difference does it make? Is that the issues at stake? Is it not the same thing that they all do? Learn to address the thrust of the matter.

@Poster
Stop worrying your head. Leave the resolution of issues to your parents. Just keep them informed on developments at home, pending the time they return, and keep watch over the girl, whenever you are around.

I have the desire to be on this thread


What do you have?

Hmmmmmmmmm, Dump! What a name! As if she were garbage. Sorry, i wont need that letter because i dont associate with garbage.

Bblak:

@jintujinta
You must be looking for my trouble for talking to my friend in that manner.ifyalways is not cut for such crap u know.Anyway ranti ,how're u doing today.

No begin feel o. Wetin ifyalways no dey cut out for. Hmmmmm, because you got a public declaration you are calling mingling crap? Okay, if it is a crap, pray make God remove man matter for your case. You fit to? You no fit.

@seun
Once you have that much "feel" for ifyalways, i think you too should go ahead with a [ublic declaration and confession, afterall victor4u is not the only fake, em, i mean only one lying on this thread.

@ifyalways
Ify, Ify becare ifybecareful, chineke mo abegi no try me o. How can you say you will call Sikira for me. You fit? Me wey you don dey die for finish. Even as you like Bblak reach, you no go fit share me with am.

And when did you become Bblak that you will be giving victor4u the condition to fulfil before hetting back to Bblak's heart. Three is a crowd o, abeg leave victor4u and Bblak alone. get busy with your partial dating

Hmmm, lucky you Bblak. I hope ifyalways too will be that lucky to get a public declaration like this, no matter how fake or pretentious it may be. That will surely shore up her market value, em, sorry, i mean ego, em, am not talking about money o. Not Ego.