₦airaland Forum

RosaConsidine:
The countries Nigerians are running to also have slums and rural areas. What do you expect the people in the rural areas of those countries to do - fly to to another planet? I was watching The Daily Show some days back and they did a special on a town in Texas where the citizens HAVE to drink and bath with bottled water because the water supplied to their homes was terribly contaminated. It's the same US Nigerians are falling over themselves to go to we're talking about o, not some village somewhere in Abia or Ekiti. See, those countries are just like ours - they have the privileged class, a middle class and a lower class. We just assume that if we went there we would be long to the at least the middle class because we already are middle-classers here. Then reality hits when you get there and find yourself at the lowest rungs of society.

Do you care to know that even some supposed cities in Nigeria don't have the luxury of water supply at all?

RosaConsidine:
The countries Nigerians are running to also have slums and rural areas. What do you expect the people in the rural areas of those countries to do - fly to to another planet? I was watching The Daily Show some days back and they did a special on a town in Texas where the citizens HAVE to drink and bath with bottled water because the water supplied to their homes was terribly contaminated. It's the same US Nigerians are falling over themselves to go to we're talking about o, not some village somewhere in Abia or Ekiti. See, those countries are just like ours - they have the privileged class, a middle class and a lower class. We just assume that if we went there we would be long to the at least the middle class because we already are middle-classers here. Then reality hits when you get there and find yourself at the lowest rungs of society.

Imagine the sort of comparism you are making? At least the slum got water supply from the government, how many here do?

RosaConsidine:
Nigeria might not be such a rosy place but trust me, it is much easier to survive here. We complain about how bad the Nigerian system is not knowing it favors a lot of us - A LOT. We don't pay as much in taxes as lots of the countries people are running to. You may not earn much here but it's easier to survive on the little you earn. I have had cause to compare the costs of accommodation and transportation in Nigeria and a few developed and even fellow African countries and even now that things are extremely bad here, we still have it cheaper. Cost of healthcare? Education? All these things are much cheaper here. Sure, the quality may not be up to what you would get in, say, the US or UK but trust me the same treatment for malaria that we take for granted here and the federal universities we keep complaining about are waaaay cheaper than trying to get services of an equivalent quality abroad.

I prefer to pay tax and high costs provided i get quality life.

Pidgin2:
The average Nigerian does not sell akamu

But do something worse!

I hate it when some people pretend like naija is such a rosy place when the reality on ground says otherwise.

Pidgin2:
Nice thread but Nigeria is not a difficult place to live in. Those who want to migrate can do so legitimately and anyone seeking to stay shouldn't be made to feel like he or she is living in hell because it isn't true. Good thread

Nigeria is not just a hell, but worse than hell.

AbayomiOS:
I'v been with a lady who was more financially buoyant, she spends more and i just feel somehow abt it. I never asked her to get me anything cos as a guy, it jst feels somehow to me...though she ocassionally do so on her own. Even though she knws she has far more money, she still wants me to ger her stuffs, thats just women for u. They love the feeling of being taken care of by a guy. Definitely, i would want to be more financially buoyant than my wife. At least, i hav experienced.

That she has more money does not mean you shouldn't care for her by getting her good stuffs sometimes.

dominique:
You might think this is fiction but it happens for real. I've seen cases of women being made to leave their well paid jobs just to satisfy their insecure husbands only to be subjected to maltreatment when they're no longer financially capable. A handful of my mum's colleagues go through all sorts ill-treatment in the hands of their husbands. One even surrenders her entire salary to her jobless husband just to let peace reign still that does not make her husband respect her. He even spends her money on girlfriends, yet the wife has to keep mum and look the other way so as not to be tagged arrogant and controlling by people. A lot of women are suffering in this country wlalahi.

Yeah! I'm aware of that, and i partly blame the womenfolk for massaging some insecure men's ego. Women should stop taking sh1t from men! Respect and always reason with the deserving men but never stoop to please an insecured man.

fufuNegusi:
What if she becomes overly pompous and wouldnt do anything in the house,
she becomes very disobedient and unruly, she neglects and ignores your stern instructions


will it still be a wonderful world?

What works in marriage is dialogue, not 'orders' and 'stern warnings'

Safiaa:
Shut up. Did i say all men? I said most.

Even your 'most' is not true!

Safiaa:
Shut up. Did i say all men? I said most.

Even the 'most' is not true!

Though i doubt the authenticity of this story, i'll still say that only a foolish man would send his wife away for being more financially successful. Those men who don't want their wives to work and earn a living do it most times for selfish reasons, yet some lazy ass girls here would not see the ulterior motive. It is all about subjugating the woman so that the man could cheat with different women and the wife will be left with no option but stay and take what the man does to her. That's inprisonment, not love. It does not show that the man takes care of his wife. A man who will take care of you will do even when you are richer. There are many men who are rich, yet their shishi would not fall out to take care of their wives' personal needs, while some men would spend their last card to care for their richer wives and still give her some warm wassage when they are back from work.

That's why i advise ladies to marry good men who sincerely care for them.

Safiaa:
The fact of the matter is that MOST men will NOT be comfortable with their wife earning more than them. There is a sense of masculinty that men get being the main financial support for their familes. Now that doesnt mean a woman should take advantage of the fact that she earns more. But hey, such is life.

When i talk about not dating 'broke men' it falls back to this. You cant tell me this is the 21st century, and women are the financial providers these days. It takes a very strong emotionally stable man to withstand his wife making more than him. Women want to naturally feel like their being taken of regardless of their own financial status, so in the end it may cause problems. Its the truth, and i dont care what anybody has to say.

You have no right to declare your opinion as the truth. This one problem we have as Nigerians, always holding unfounded views as truth.

Not all men want to keep their women down in order to control her. That's insecurity!

lefulefu:
her initial post did not throw any inuslt at the igbos.she only said she never had it right with igbo guys then she resorted to dating other guys from other tribes.where is the insult in that? she was not offensive then but only when shades were thrown at her.

Read through my conversation with her. I tried to explain to her why some igbo parents kick against their sons marrying from other tribes{ with apologies o for her experience}, then she resorted to making bigoted comments like that all prostitutes in lagos are igbos, that all the igbos that marry outside igbo culture are OSU who couldn't find spouses from igboland and so seek companionship from outside. I don't know about the other people she has been exchanging words with, but what about about me? Did i type anything bad in my replies to her

Note that my mentioning her in the first place was not to make her change her mind about not wanting to date/marry igbo, but for her not to spread lies.

victorian:
Its alright dear .

Am not angry . its just too much when people try all they can to spoil someone image all because of envy . its very bad .
Because you mentioned initially that you are done with Igbo does not give anyone the right to castigate you . its your choice and your decision .
I wonder what the hulabaloo and all this hatred is all about .
They don't know you from anywhere and they are there talking as if they are part of your family or even close friends.
Its too bad . Thats why this country is where it is today .
Too much envy , too much hatred .
Smhhhh


My dear , please pm me ,

I like you already . I don't care what anyone says about you .
Lets chat privately

You were too quick to jump to her defense but chose to ignore all the fallacious comments she has been making about a whole tribe. You didn't deem it proper to also caution her against castigating a whole tribe just because of her experience with a few guys.

lefulefu:
ppl get sad over a breakup.thats not a new thing ts human nature.how that one come take correlate say na ashi she be?
hmm nairaland and story story.

And you didn't read or you simply chose to ignore all the aspersions she has been casting on a whole tribe because of the sins of a few guys? Yet you were quick to come to defend her. Good boy!

Why is it that when it comes to the issue of wives and inlaws everybody likes to hastely take side with the lady Nobody is even asking question of how the lady's attitude is. Everybody is siding her even when her bad character may have been the reason for her not being liked by her inlaws. All the inlaws can not just hate her for no reason.

Again, what efforts has she made to reach out to her inlaws? That's what a good lady would do before planning to abscond with the baby.

How about the underaged voters we saw voting in the election?

The truth is that jega tactically rigged that election in favour of buhari. He did that by making sure that while the northers got their PVCs, majority of southerners including myself didn't get it. I know how many times i was at INEC office in Abuja to get the the card, but they frustrated my efforts.

alexialin:
Thanks dear

And those ones ,some are saying they marry south south.. Its highly possible they are OSU, so no one in Igbo land wil ever marry them , so definitely they will seek for companions outside .
I will gist u more later .

I don't like the way you are going about this issue. Who told you that those igbos marrying from south-south are osu? Do you know that 90% of igbos no longer practice the osu caste system? My uncle married from Obiarukwu in delta, 2 of my cousin sisters are married to Akwaibom men. These are just the ones close to me. Stop lying please!

alexialin:
Well its unfortunate the Igbo parents are so myopic. Because promiscuity is not written on the forehead of certain tribes .. But if u want to go down that route? Who am I not to oblige your statement .
Everyone knows in club houses and hotels, is Igbo ladies u will find there , in majority selling their bodies for peanuts .its well known fact ! Especially in Lagos and in the north ..lol
Even in campuses , Igbo ladies thrive in prostitution there .

Sorry my Igbo ladies in this category out there , for revealing this secret. Cause villagers at home and Igbo guys abroad have no idea what they are paying high bride price on..

So my brother , if its promiscuity your parents and other Igbo parents are worried about ? They should come to Lagos and see what their future brides are doing with series of men from all tribes .
And that's fact!

I understand that many igbo ladies are into prostitution, but those are not the type they recomend for marriage.

GloriaNinja:
"Amala " should be BANNED AS WELL, THE DRUG NO DEY GOOD AT ALL.

Do you react to amalar?

Always insist on seeing the pharmacist when you go to buy drugs. Their professional advice will save you alot of health risk and even money.

alexialin:
Am delta, Warri and now prefer Edo .

Way back then,I was obssessed with marrying Igbo. But my two Igbo exs especially their families , way back made me realise what tribalism is all about and its for real.

Then I had to go back to the drawing board , work on myself and also change the kind of guys i date and tribe too. Edo guy came into my life and I realise delta and Edo have so many things in common and i really feel athome with my man from Edo and his family , and my other female friends and male friends from Edo state.
It's like experiencing home in Lagos . its a deep and soul lifting experience .
With speaking pidgin inclusive

Sorry about your experience with those igbo exes. The problem is that many igbo parents have this bigoted believe that ladies from delta{ especially the non igbo parts} and edo are promiscous and would not be faithful to their sons. But now many igbo guys defy their families and marry their ladies regardless tribe.

lazygal:
Look around you dear,we have many ladies with these qualities you are stating ...and what makes u feel because a few fantasize over celebs so the average lady does? Don't men fantasize also ?

Men fantasize but they know where to draw the line. But ladies will want to see their celeb crush in their man literally and so they turn down many suitors with the hope of finding their fantasy.

Another reason is that while men would stoop low to marry ladies who are not in their class with no qualms, ladies RARELY do marry a guy they consider below them. That is why there are educated working class ladies who are single. Many of them would not even settle for a guy who is at par with them let alone one below. And they forget that most of the richer and classier men would rather use their wealth to 'acquire' younger and fresher babes of who might even be of lower class.

Amarabae:
The problem is that all these beard gang tight jeans and starched big shirt wearing guys hardly propose, they are mostly time-wasters, some of them can be found in Romanceland. Lol

Then date those that can propose and stop wasting time with those that are not ready.

Edo, but their wahala too mushh...

lazygal:
Aunty before nko? Ehen!? If we don't they will say we ate gold diggers or lazy ..which one b which if we face career is bad if we don't is bad

Face your career, be confident, dress good and smart, read wide to open you mind, don't appear needy, be bold, socialize, be selfless, don't look down on people, don't have that mindset of a man is the 'head' and must provide all my needs, stop fantasizing about celebs if you are not one. If you can do the above, you will not just find a man, but a man who will love the ground upon which you walk.

Misypee:
now you know what girls pass through

I tell you!

If i were a girl, i wld have been a boxer so that any guy that messes up with me would get the beating of his life.

I would never accept to play second fiddle to any man.

I would never accept to be a house wife or to be restricted to the kitchen.

I would never tolerate a cheating man for whatever reason.

I would not accept the tag of being the weaker sex...

I reserve my comment until the result of the post mortem is out.

But the truth is that many of these doctors lack knowledge of drugs, and their big ego would not allow them to consult a Pharmacist.That was how one doctor prescribed tramadol for my aunt to treat contraceptives-induced hypertension. If not that my brother who happened to know the drug for another use became suspicious and called me to confirm, maybe the hypertension would have gone worse b4 they realize the error.

R.I.P to the dead man.

There are alot of advantages in having many offspring from the same mom. Just bond them very well and try and educate them. They will all attain greatness by coperative interactions.

I know a family of nine issues, all the children from the eldest to the youngest are professionals and doing very well.

Provided she's not below 18 and is mentally matured.

This is so true and the fault is from some sex starved boys and old married men who would practically lay down their lives just to be fuccked by a lady.

I used to have one shameless friend like that who has this annoying attitude of hitting on every girl that passed by on the road.Even small sec school girls that should be calling him uncle. I warned him severally to stop messing up where small girls are but he refused, so i had to cut him off.

One sure way of getting the ladies{especially the immature girls} disrespect a guy is showing them that you are thirsty for their pussies.

Good advice. But i think it should go to the ladies as well. As a guy i can't marry a lady of lower class.