₦airaland Forum

steppins:
But she's a monster Na.

Find out who she was and find the definition of a monster. Never judge a book by its cover.

Family Over Everything!

OP your own list might even be longer than hers. I can imagine how much burden your heart is carrying to have kept all these that even Tonto may not remember. keep it up.

OP your own list might even be longer than hers. I can imagine how much burden your heart is carrying to have kept all this that even Tonto may not remember. keep it up.

Some advice don't need to be given with soft words at all... Sex chat leading to divorce? I laugh tire. My dear, if I were to be in her shoes, that man will never sex chat all his life again because that very moment he will 'sex live' until the police will intervene. On a serious note, that is not reason enough to deny a 5 year a kid the joy of growing with both parents. Men do worst things that their wives are not even aware of. I hope your sis put this behind her and enjoy her marriage.

After my experience I never and will never buy online again. I know that feelings

OoniOfIfe:
So?

It's a pity you don't know what it means. That picture serves as an endorsement and a life time reference to aid that guy reach higher goals. It means a lot to that guy being an achiever.

soonest:
@juzzybabe, don't you want to move on. Catholic church will hardly give nullification to a consummated marriage that wasn't based on deceit.

I want to move on ooo in short I have even started moving on but I also need to officially settle this in order to be right with God before moving one finally. I am as well pleading with the priest involved to help us out but the guy is just very restless. I can't get why he is requesting ring and marriage certificate and concluding marriage is dissolved. The direction my life is going, I need the nullification more than that dude but I don't want him to sense it.

I can't imagine how wicked and evil some people can choose to be. I waited patiently for my husband to make the move for divorce and he attempted, his only and biggest troubles now is getting divorce in the catholic church is like picking salt amongst sand. Especially as he refused telling the obvious truth. He has been pestering me to send the rings and marriage certificate and we both assume the marriage is nullified which I refused and can never grant unless he follows the right path to nullification. According to him, we don't need the church.
Well he and his mother desperation forced them to get a half educated lawyer and he filed a petition against me which I will gladly share here. Of all the lies he told, only one got me thanking my God and people here for helping me out of that evil family. One of the reason my husband wants divorce is because I stayed hours in labour pain and finally had a CS. I can't imagine a married this wild beast...BTW, even animal have feelings,so I don't know which category to put him. His mother is also pressing all buttons as I speak to free her son off this marriage. But I pray that God forgives her after punishing her accordingly. What is this world turning into?

Every time i read stories like this, i get really angry remembering how wicked my ex husband was and i also regret not locking him up in prison for laying his filthy hands on me even while pregnant. Well he is a visitor on this forum, i pray he reads and treats his next wife with care as i have kissed him goodbye or else, he might not have the luck of freedom he had with me. All these good for-nothing beast that abuses women...hiss. Anyway, RIP to the dead. And those women living with such men and hoping he will change...may God bless your hope ooo

RIH345:
We are literally going through the same situation. Married for less than 7 months, newborn baby, a husband who went from worshipping me to now only wanting to talk about the baby, demanding that his mother is able to take our daughter to care for her while i sit around and do nothing i guess, and so much more drama. All i do is pray and fast because this pain is something I wouldn't wish on my worst enemy. All my family is saying i married into the wrong family, my marriage was built on a faulty foundation based on lies & deceit & that I should divorce. As much as I can agreex i love my husband so much I can't bear to think of divorcing him, but he hasn't tried to reconcile with me for almost 2 months now not one time. I now see that the hold his mother has on his family & him is stronger than our love.

My dear, even though your story is not so clear but I will like to point out few things. My decision to leave my husband and his parents was the best thing I ever did. But I will not encourage someone else to do the same because, in my case, leaving was the only and best choice I had. I don't know the reason why your husband said his mother should help with the kid...does he want you to be a full time house wife, relaxing all day while his mum handles your baby and he works? or you go to work while his mum help with the kid? are you in good rapol with his mum? please explain better what the situation is.
Another thing, please do not be so hasty to make people give you some bad talks about your marriage. Every marriages have challenges some can be overcome with patience while some can't.
Just of recent my husband file a petition against me and what was written in that petition made me got on my knees and praise God for the wisdom to make the decision of leaving with my kid.
My point is, be mindful of the decision you make. Am here if you want to talk.

Eneze1:
How are you Juzzybabe?

I am fine o. Thanks so much for checking up.

TonyeBarcanista:
Perhaps you should read the word of God.


"Whoever spares the rod hates their children, but the one who loves their children is careful to discipline them."- Proverbs 13:24



" Folly is bound up in the heart of a child, but the rod of discipline will drive it far away." Proverbs 22:15

"because the Lord disciplines the one he loves, and he chastens everyone he accepts as his son."- Hebrews 12:6



Do you love your child?

kekekekeke this one got be cracking here. in other news,that was how a guy cut off his joy stick and said the bible says " if your right eye causes you yo sin plug it out"
Now back to you,if God was using the rod on you accordingly as u sin,do u think u will be alive or normal to write this It takes wisdom to understand the word of God. I am not saying never discipline your child but never mistake your child for an animal all because of a crime that words could possibly correct.
the kind of rod I uses on my kid is the word of God, Morals and immediate corrections and every of her mistakes.
Pray for wisdom to understand God's word. His words are beautiful,carefully made without any errors. Thank You.

TonyeBarcanista:
A teacher that beats/punishes my child without cause will have me to contend with. BUT if my child misbehaves, I'll give the Teacher a handshake for doing the needful whether punishment or otherwise.

Those days, I do get punished each time I'm late to school (from primary to secondary). Though I do feel angered but overtime I realised how it has sharpen me.

I love my mom till death but she was a disciplinarian to the core, in fact, she would go extreme (which I don't subscribe to), but her discipline made me a better person. Ditto my Dad.

BTW it wasn't about poverty, an Ex Bestfriend Tega was a typical Ajebutter then. When we fought one day, his mom told a teacher to seriously FLOG us(we were in JS 1 and 10years olds). After the serious lashing, we never fought again

Dear, punishment of such leaves most kids feeling very less of themselves among peers. it leaves a psychological effect that grows in them. Do you know that just words can make your kids abide by all regulations? most parents are not just patient enough to have a chat with their kids. either pick pin, pin pick,crawl in bud, carry bag on head and whatever punishment una call it, I will never condone such for my precious child. Train your child from small with good morals accompanied with the word of God and you won't believe who your child will grow to be.

TonyeBarcanista:
What is barbaric here? It is discipline my Dear OP. Some of us experienced it while in primary school. For some of us it was kneel down + flogging.


Yes, it made lots of kids understand the importance of punctuality.

And you seriously think this is one sure way of installing discipline in a kid? Will you embrace the teacher if your kid was among? probably you have not started having babies, trust me,the moment you do,you will know the feeling that comes with loving one's child. or trust me, poverty and illiteracy can make some parents think this is one of the best ways of correcting a kid. Even as adults, we make the same mistakes these kids make, maybe such punishment should still be passed on to people like you who supports this, u may have forgotten the feelings of such while in public school. Cause this happens only in public schools where the poor can't speak as they have no hope. My dear, if u have children or planing on having, let them have a taste of this everyday, it will help them grow to be successful as u think.

BEENUEL:
Dyt!!! It's a pleasure to quote you...shortest name on NL

Their shoes though.... .....very d I R T Y!, especially the bride own

Gosh! you guys can be mean ooo

Timbuktou:
Interesting thought. Why would you say about men who manage an emotionally and verbally abusive one, though?

My point of view, (either men or women) you can easily live with verbal abuse and get over emotional abuse but one might not Survive physical abuse. People who manages physical abuse in marriages/relationships just to break the record, always leave us with their tale to serve as a lesson while they are either gone,or damaged beyond repairs.

Any woman managing a physically abusive relationship, simply has nothing to live for.

GasAndOilTheory:
You mentioned incident but cautiously excluded what happened probably because you know you where wrong.

Even from your narration.... Its obvious you excluded some important details....
Was it on your right or left cheek she hit ?
Or both at the same time?
Biko, make sure you beg your HM tomorrow, you are lucky she didn't allerydice you instantly

She needs to apologize to the mother of the kid as well. No mother will feel safe having her kid in the care of an enemy.

My dear, the kind of woman you want to build a family with and the location you choose to stay will determine the possibilities of your desire.

bilulu:
bros does d age matters? mind u I finished my Nysc not last year

Humm...you have no idea why he asked you "how old are you"

deracathy:
That's so true. Being able to showcase your soft skills at any interview.
Never knew being punctual is a skill until an interviewer made mention of it.

Always be there before time. You might just think no one cares but trust me you are being watched in most cases. Some go on snapping selfies in the waiting room,that is a minus. Dress code as the OP stated is very important. I have sent lot of guys away on my boss order for not wearing socs to the interview. Isn't that crazy? But always follow the rules be properly dressed and wear your smiles.

niggi4life:
Forget all this bla bla bla.
When God says it's your turn nothing will stop it.
When i got my first job some years ago, i had no experience, i was fasting so i was hungry and my mouth was very dry, i didn't have the luxury of putting on nice clothes because no money to buy them
80% of the questions they asked was strange by me. I only replied with "we learn everyday" i had no connection whatsoever and to add insult upon injury we were up to 7 being interviewed for just one position, 4 people among us were well experienced but alas, it was i who was chosen.
All what i mean is that, just relax and don't panic, believe me whatever will be will surely be

My dear, when you had your first interview, am sure you were not just sitting there like a robot and saying "we learn everyday". Sometimes,it can't be all about CV but your Smiling kills and ability to win the interviewer's heart just as the OP also stated. So which one is " bla bla bla" as if you didn't apply the some of the major skills as stated? If you were to coach a friend or younger on this topic,wonder if this is the advice you will give. Sometimes, CV and qualifications just can't win you the job but your social skill at the interview. That's why in a competitive environment like Nigeria,one needs to combine all these skills in order to win an interview.

Prettiepearlz:
Lol, don't mind him he will get tired, he is only an attention seeker. When he is serious he will send the divorce papers or better still why not send yours to him?

I was told by the priest and lawyers i contacted that in order to push forward my case, i have to be present, and i just switch jobs which am not entitled to any leave for now.

Onegai:
Ignore him. Where is your lawyer? Get a good one (everyone in the family should donate to get one if need be) and let the lawyer henceforth be the only one having any contact with him. Let your father inform your family that under no circumstances should anyone in the family engage him in any sort of dialogue. No-one beg, no-one insult, no-one from familiarity with him, no-one say anything other than "please speak to the lawyers concerning this matter. Good day" and drop the phone. If he wants his bride price back, it was paid to your family by him and his family, so let his family come and collect it after doing the necessary traditional requirement for the return (you don't just return the money). Keep your child away from any of his family unsupervised. They may only visit when you and several family members are present.

OK. My father is late but i got uncles. And i am not in Nigeria so he and his family have absolutely no access to my kid.

Prettiepearlz:
Mtchewww,which money? He should return you back to the way he met you first and then you can think of returning the bride price. Nonsense! He knew he has been defeated, and it's painful to him, that's why he is coming up with different drama. First it was his child, now marriage certificate, wedding rings(Is the ring a family jewelry?) and bride price, na wa ooooooooo, the thing is the man doesn't want a divorce, he is only pulling stunts because if he is truly serious he would have sent the divorce papers. He feels you would come begging since he knows he is the only man you have known for 9 years, so he feels he has you under his wings. Ignore him and tell your siblings to do the same. He will get tired.

you got my ribs cracking. Anyway its just the fact he is defeated and its hard to accept so he's forming drama.

thorpido:
They should just block him on all social media.Tell him to get his lawyer to file for divorce and send the papers.

He has started o! calls has been coming in from my aunts in Nigeria that he's been calling insulting n demanding money he paid for bride price.

thorpido:
Tell him to send the divorce papers first.

Initially, he had been throwing insults at my siblings on social networks which i warned him and even called his Dad to caution him on. Now he has threaten that if i don't send him the rings and marriage cert through DHL,he's gonna keep troubling my siblings.

Until this moment, my husband has not send anything for divorce but he is disturbing me to send his rings and marriage certificate. Make una see me see trouble oooo. Abeg, is this how divorce is done?

Until this moment, my husband has not send anything for divorce but he is disturbing me to send his rings and marriage certificate. Make una see me see trouble oooo. Abeg, is this how divorce is done?

Hey Dear, all i will say is, don't give up. I don't think its enough to get fed up. I know the feelings, i have a great idea of what you are passing through but either you have kids or not, hold your marriage and keep working and praying. Do the best you can and remain faithful and loyal,someday,he's gonna need a friend and it will just be your turn.
Really, i don't know whats with Nigerian mothers and their son's marriages...should his mother feel really comfortable that her son bought her a car without your consent or knowledge? SMH.

veekid:
Laptop for 8yrs old kid? is that not to early?

No.