₦airaland Forum

I dont mind paying #100,000 for electricity EVERY MONTH, if that is what l have used!

Let me have a Pre-Paid Meter and let me "manage my own cost" myself!
Put me in Prison then, if l fail to pay!

But to think you can impose just any amount on me because "You're Government", ITS A JOKE!

The issue is not about whether Nigerians pay, like to pay or dont pay for electricity. That is arrant nonsense!

What we should all be protesting for, is that the Pre-Paid Meter be made available to those who want it (if you cant make it standard for everyone).
Why are they hiding the Meters?

'Cos it has exposed the "fathom Bills" that they bring every month, light or no-light!

The sad part is that most Nigerians are too dumb and too cowardly, to demand forcefully, for what is rightfully theirs!
Just too dumb set of humans.

BTW: I was out of the country for 6weeks (House was completely empty and Change-Over switch was off Nepa-source, for safety reasons) and yet PHCN brought bill of #38,000 for 4weeks of those six weeks!

Now tell me, is it PHCN GHOSTS that were using electricity in my home, DURING MY ABSENCE? Fecking Rogues!

Hmmmm.,.,., I am guilty of idleness this evening and l am here on this thread!


Now, can we have another silly Thread like: Which Pastor can have SEX for 4hrs non-stop!

Or Better still, which Pastor has laid more of his female Congregation!!

These will make nice threads on "front page" AND WHEN I AM IDLE AND THE DEVIL IS AT WORK, l will come here again, to show it (Yawns and saunters about aimlessly)

No wonder The Pastors keeps getting "richer" while the "church members" keep getting poorer!
Mtchew!

This bit sums up the difference!

@Lorddpx: Was a graduate at the age of 23. Worked at a reputable bank and top profile construction company, and resigned to start my own business after coming into some capital and went into farming. Mind you, besides been a farmer, working on a 2nd degree, and I add a professional certs yearly. Last year, NIPR, and currently at NIMN.
I started my farm with 2000 birds, 500 fingerlings and after a year of been starved of capital: need a pen besides existing land, and battery cages cost a fortune as well as van etc
The products (eggs, chickens, fish, pork) has a shocking demand, and theres limitless market in this country for agricultural products, eggs, chickens, turkeys, snails, fish, etc
Seriously, its been like hell when you cant even approach a bank for loans. Their beauricratic carousel alone is enough to kill your spirit but well man's gotta fight.
Right now, I am operating with marginal profits, I cant expand because where on earth will the capital come from when UBA, and FCMB told me that the 50billion naira agricultural loan is for the types of Dangotes alone. They told me I must have an asset worth 300 million naira before they can give me a loan. Isnt that an insult! And you wonder who gave them this loan in the first place; if it wasnt our own lazy FG and I sometimes wonder if Lamido is actually aware of what youths are going through in this country. And talk about the bank of industry, those guys would rather pass loans to their housekeepers rather than people with vision and dreams. Ive become a professional loan seeker, and right now, its a job im thinking wont yeild anything in this country as long as your into agriculture or anything long term. Banks dont like risky business. They give loans to businesses they understand, and this is why Nigeria is still stuck in the past. Old toilet. New toilet. Same excreta
Anyways, I am still stuck between deciding on leaving the business because of its high capital depedency. For a long time now, I keep making money and seeing it disappear on expenses, and keeping my workers and customers satisfied, and this is getting a little old for me now.
There are several Nigerians who will make Dangote look like he needs to go back to school to relearn business if given the right capital. Its just a shame that wont happen.

I just hope that Dangote and all his wealth will stop putting Trailers that suck-up innocent peoples blood, ON THE ROAD!
Did anyone read/notice when he Dangote told President Jonathan that "His company looses no less than 5,000 Trucks every year, to road accidents?

Now, tell me: A so-smart chap like him should have done something about that.,.,.,.,.,IF HE WANTED TO!

BTW: I do not aspire to be like Dangote! I just want to be me and l am very comfortable in my own skin!!

@MArkenny.
I feel your love!
Nothing compares to the love of a father for his son, You cant just describe it, no matter how much you try!

I can feel the "glow" inside you!
I can imagine the "promises" you're making to yourself!
I can smell the "rehearsals" of what you will do, when he starts walking!
I can taste your "sweat" as you struggle to give him the best life can offer!
I can feel your "muscle twitching", as you stand ready to defend your son, come what may!

And l pray that God will help you, to nurture him, spare his life and teach him the wisdom from above.
May the "devil and his agents" never come between you and your son, like in the Nigeria's Ambassadors to Kenya family! )

Truly, THERE IS NO LOVE COMPARABLE TO THE LOVE OF A FATHER, FOR HIS SON

If they dont sell (or dash out) the cars, how can NASS President and Committee chairpersons "approve another inflated Contract" to purchase new ones?

Dont you know this is NIGERIA WHERE RULERS ARE CRIMINALS AND THE CITIZENS ARE WIMPS?

Mubarak did not VACATE because he was a nice guy, or because Egyptians can type well on Niaraland!

HE WAS FORCED OUT, DITTO BEN ALLI, GHADAFI, SALEY OF YEMEN, e.t.c

Lets stop deceiving ourselves, "suffer head just start".,.,.,.,. (begins to sing "Original Suffer-head" - Fela Anikulapo Kuti)

Ask yourself: Why would other more credible Newspapers in Kenya refuse to carry this story?

Ask yourself: Why are the two grown-up children disgusted with the Sun Newspaper? (More like one of our own Newspaper that you will never believe wont mention their name now!

Assuming it was the husband that actually injured her in a FIGHT, ask yourself: What was her intention is "splashing the blood allover her face"?

*Why leave a Law job in the U.K, to go and live with a husband who have not only married someone else (when you banned him from coming to your matrimonial home in UK and took another lover inside) but one which both of you communicate just by passing notes under the door! Why not just live your quiet life in UK and let him be in Kenya or is she saying KENYA life is now better than U.K?

I think the woman is just a naturally quarrelsome woman.
She is hell-bent on destroying this man and we can see from the "infantile comments" on NLand, she really planned her move very well!

Let me ask: As a grown man, can you ever stand idly by and watch your father (God forbid it happens) beat-up your Mother and do nothing?
Why then did the children (including a man!) not respond as expected, if this "so called barbaric beating" actually occurred? She herself confirmed that he children were present!

Unhh-huun, God is up above and watching us and he will judge us accordingly.

Okay, this is it.
WARNING: ITS LONG BUT TRY AND FINISH IT. YOU WILL LEARN FROM READING THIS!

RESPONSE TO ALLEGATIONS OF WIFE BATTERING AGAINST ME, DR CHIJIOKE WIGWE, BY MRS TESS IYI WIGWE AS PUBLISHED BY THE STAR NEWSPAPER ON 26TH MAY 2011

Background

I married Tess Iyi Wigwe (nee Oniga) under native law and custom on 9th April 1978. The girl I married was famous for her temper and fighting ability. With my gentle and unassuming nature, I honestly believed that the sharp contrast in our characters could neutralize and complement each other. It was a grave error of judgment.



I joined the Nigerian Foreign Service in April 1984 after teaching at the University of Jos for some years. My first posting in 1986 was to Tokyo, Japan. I was in charge of Commercial and Trade Matters. One night in July 1988, I took my female colleague from another Embassy out for dinner. It was actually the first outing. After dinner, I took her in my car in order to drop her off at a train station. As we drove through town, a car which I quickly recognised as mine (I owned 2 cars) and being driven by Mrs Wigwe pulled up beside us at a traffic light. Mrs Wigwe hurled air freshener bottles and any other objects she could find in the car to hit us. I later came down from the vehicle and explained to her who the lady was. But she did not believe me and instead chased me through the city shouting abuses at us and throwing objects at us. When I got to a train station, I opened the door and let the lady out. Mrs Wigwe abandoned her car in the middle of the road causing a big jam as she ran after the lady. She caught up with her and after interrogating her, seriously assaulted her, and beat her so mercilessly using the woman’s umbrella that the woman passed out. Mrs Wigwe fearing that the lady was dead fled the scene taking with her the woman’s hand bag. Good Samaritans took the lady to hospital where she spent one month in intensive care. I was made to pay the woman’s hospital bills. The morning after the attack, Mrs Wigwe traced me to the Embassy where I had taken shelter and took a huge stone and smashed the windscreen of the car to pieces. Mrs Wigwe never admitted to taking the handbag and its contents. However, months later, the wife of a colleague with whom she had left the handbag, confessed. This gross act of violence visited on an innocent woman, so angered the Nigerian Ambassador and the entire staff that it was decided that Mrs Wigwe should be punished severely to deter other wives with such inclinations. Accordingly, she was suspended from post for 3 months and repatriated to Nigeria by the Embassy in October 1988. She spent a total of 6 months at home coming back only in April 1989 when my posting came to an abrupt end following the decision of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs to recall over 150 officers worldwide who had spent 24 months and above at post in the wake of the structural adjustment programme of the government of the day.



That premature recall had a serious psychological impact on my very young family of 4 and I decided to take a one year study leave at own expense ostensibly to pursue a post-graduate diploma in journalism in London, but strategically, to insulate our children from the disruptive effects of the unpredictable posting policy of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. I therefore took my family along with me at great cost. When I left England in February 1992, I left my family behind. In 1993 I was posted to Warsaw, Poland but my family remained in London for the sake of the children’s and Mrs Wigwe’s education. Having learnt a bitter lesson from Tokyo, I unilaterally decided that Mrs Wigwe must not live with me at post in Warsaw. Instead, I encouraged her quest for higher education since she had only secondary education when I married her. She graduated from Middlesex University in July 1998. I paid her fees through university from 1993 and law school. At the end of my posting in October 1998, I returned to Nigeria. The family, now well established and settled, remained in London. Between 1998 and 1999 I made regular visits to the family. In November 1999, Mrs Wigwe visited me in Abuja and we travelled to her home town. We had a very serious misunderstanding. We returned to Abuja and she travelled back to London. When she returned to London after two weeks, she informed me that she no longer wished for me to come to London as previously planned to spend the Christmas and New Year holidays. All my efforts to reach her by telephone, fax and mail were unsuccessful. The situation continued until 2002 when on transiting London en route New York for an official assignment in July 2002, I discovered that Mrs Wigwe had brought her male lover, a Nigerian of Yoruba tribe, to live with her and the children in the family house. The children told me how they had bitterly resented her and her lover. But she ignored the children and co-habited with her boyfriend in the family house for close to a year. To all intents and purposes, we were still husband and wife; we were not even officially separated! It was then I knew the reason why I had been barred from visiting the family since 1999. Consequently, and bruising from the humiliation she had bestowed on me and the children in particular, I hastily remarried in December 2002. I married my colleague in the service whom I had not actually known for more than six months. By mutual consent in December 2006, we decided to separate amicably and to remain friends which we are to date. As the marriage had no children it was quite easy for us to part. I remained a bachelor.



Following my nomination as ambassador in September 2007, I called Mrs Wigwe on phone to offer her an olive branch and to ask her to join me, if she so wished, to associate with my new appointment. It was another grave error of judgment. Although I never intended that we should live together under the same roof again as husband and wife given our antecedents and the coldness of feelings that mutually existed between us after many years of separate lives. I was only prepared for her to have a sense of belonging and attachment to my new status considering also that we have 5 children together. I thought the honour was due to her. She accepted and travelled to see me in Abuja in April 2008. Our first encounter after many years, proved to me and I guess to her, that we could truly no longer call ourselves husband and wife. Nevertheless and much to my shock and deep apprehension, she decided to take a leave of absence for 3 years from her employer in London to join me in residence in Nairobi. She insisted that I should take over her monthly expenditures in London including an ongoing mortgage for the family house I had myself helped her to buy in 2004 after she was on the verge of losing it due to lack of funds to meet her housing loan requirements. I did this in spite of not being married to her. I did it for the sake of the children. I could not contest her decision to come and live with me in Nairobi thus I let her come. But, it was clear as crystal that our differences and her mistrust of me and our mutual dislike for each other’s company were insoluble but above all that our long evaporated love would never come back. Thus, we have been living in separate bedrooms connected by an inner door that is firmly and permanently locked from her side of the border. We decided to live with as minimal contact with each other as we could manage. Because she often refused to open her door, we developed the art of communication by notes pushed under the door. She liked it so much as it often allowed her to state her endless money requests without having to justify them. We hardly engage in conversations except when she needs money. Our irregular engagements in the act of conversation often end up in a quarrel. In public we manage to present a united front but those who are close to us know that we were only putting up appearances. We did fairly well and were just longing for the end of my tenure as ambassador so that we could resume forever our separate lives. That long hoped for time is nearly with us and hence the deep anxiety on the part of Mrs Wigwe who for 3 years has lived in reasonable comfort and financial security, with a Mercedes Benz car and a driver to complement her status. The end of my tenure would mean a return to financial stress and anxiety for her. Mrs Wigwe is in a desperate mood. I am reliably informed that most of the GBP 1,700 mortgage (about $2,800) that I have to cough out every month from my meagre Foreign Service allowance and remit to her account in London through my Barclays account in Nairobi, was allegedly misappropriated by someone she trusted in London and that to date the mortgage in London is in tatters and Mrs Wigwe has suffered a loss of GBP 10,000. Besides this loss, Mrs Wigwe claimed that she had lost $6,000 in cash from her bedroom in 2009 and most recently another $3,000. The houseboy then in 2009 was accused of stealing the money from Mrs Wigwe’s 24 hour locked bedroom. The servant pleaded his innocence and the money was never found and police abandoned the matter and we sacked the servant. The latest theft of $3,000 again from her heavily locked bedroom sometime this year remains a mystery. She did interrogate the new servant and even followed him to his house to interrogate his wife, but nothing came of it. Mrs Wigwe is in a desperate state financially. This is the motive for the onslaught against me in a desperate attempt to tarnish my image and reputation and to get monetary compensation that will restore her big loss and sustain her for a long time. That is why she has carefully chosen the words she used in the story that appeared in the Star where she was talking of spine and paralysis. Mrs Wigwe is an avid watcher of the television channel Crime Investigation. She hardly watches anything else. She had obviously practised and rehearsed her lines and actions for months in her premeditated assault on me on Wednesday 11th May 2011. Concerning her wish for spine injury that would lead to paralysis, I can only pray God to please graciously grant her wish so that she may truly know what it is to have spine injury.


ALLEGATION OF WIFE BATTERING

On Thursday 26th May 2011, the Star, a Nairobi based tabloid, published a story in its front page with photographs showing a badly bruised face of Mrs Tess Wigwe and an allegation that I, her husband, had inflicted those injuries on her face. It was alleged that I had beaten my wife because she had responded to a “note” from me requesting to be served food. It was alleged that I had so beaten her that she suffered injuries to her spine and she was in danger of being paralysed. Many other allegations dating back to many years then followed in her premeditated attempt to build a solid case against me, including the foolish allegation that I used to bring women to the Residence in 2008 and the blatantly false information that she left me in Nigeria in 1999 and went to England to study and live.


RESPONSE

In response to these allegations, I wish to state quite categorically that I did not beat my wife and that I did not ask for food either in writing or verbally. What happened that fateful Wednesday night was shocking to me and clearly fits into a pre-planned mould cast by the avid Crime TV watcher, I had returned home late at night after attending the launch of a new product, Go Places, by Kenya Commercial Bank which was held at the Hilton Hotel. As is my practice, I went straight to my room and began to take off my jacket. Mrs Wigwe matched into my room shouting on top of her voice (that is how she speaks to me) that if I knew I would not be eating at home, I should tell her so she does not have to prepare any meals for me. I was stunned as indeed I had been eating regularly every day when I come home from work. I took it for a joke but I saw she was going on and on and would not let me put in a word. Her loud voice attracted my daughter Ada who came over to my room. Upon sighting my daughter I told her to please convince her mother that I had been eating food I met in the fridge every day at least for the past two weeks. Mrs Wigwe was taking none of that and insisted and before I knew it she was abusing me and calling me names. I naturally got angry and told her that if she were indeed taking proper charge of her kitchen then she would have noticed that I do eat what has been prepared for me. She took offence with my comment and became agitated when I asked her when or what has prompted her sudden interest and care for my welfare.

In her characteristic manner, Mrs Wigwe lunged at me to slap me. I tried defending myself and indeed my daughter came in the way and as we tussled and jostled around the door to her own bedroom where a massive wooden shoe rack was standing, Mrs Wigwe received a cut. Once she felt blood on her right side of face, Mrs Wigwe used her right hand to rub the blood and smeared her entire face with it. She ran into her bedroom and produced a camera and in the presence of my daughter and I, Mrs Wigwe photographed herself, taking two to three shots. She was shouting that she had got me, and that the whole world was going to see her bloodied face; that she was going to send the picture to Abuja. As my daughter and I tried to push her into her room to prevent her from coming to fight me, my daughter’s hand was caught in the bedroom door and she gasped in pain. Mrs Wigwe also grabbed her phone and called her friend Yvonne to come and take her as she had been injured and bleeding. My son Nelson, who also joined in the effort to restrain Mrs Wigwe, offered to wipe the blood but Mrs Wigwe refused. With camera in hand, Mrs Wigwe ran downstairs and outside the building and for the next one hour was hurling abuses at me and shouting obscenities about me and my family and friends. It took the combined efforts of the Security Guard, the Cook and my son Nelson Ikenna to hold her back and prevent her from re-entering the house which I had now safely locked. In frustration that she could not re-enter the house, Mrs Wigwe who claimed in her report to the Star that she had suffered spinal injury, managed to wrestle with three able men and finally broke loose to carry a flower pot to smash the big glass window of the room we use as gym. She carried the flower pot and threw it at the glass window, shattering it. Not long after, her friend Yvonne arrived and together with my daughter they drove off. No ambulance was needed to convey Mrs Wigwe to hospital. Mrs Wigwe did not first rush to the Police to report the incident and show her injuries to the police. Mrs Wigwe only reported to the police on 27th May! That speaks volumes. She went to the police after people had begun to doubt her story! The first wave of shock when the story first hit the headlines had begun to give way to sombre reflection and analysis. As the children and house staff began to contradict her story, she decided it was time to make a statement to the police. She began to focus on her dual citizenship and what the British government might do for her.



Yvonne later sent me a text message saying Mrs Wigwe and daughter had been admitted at Aga Khan Hospital. I sent Mrs Wigwe a text in the morning advising her to get much needed rest. I also wanted to go and see her but she bluntly told me to keep off and to await a letter from her lawyer and to watch the news for what was going to happen to me. I had advised her to take the period to rest properly in hospital having noticed that since January she had lacked proper sleep following the devastating news of the alleged misappropriation of GBP 10,000 by her trusted friend and the “theft” of $3,000 in-house. Of course, she was not aware that my son Nelson to whom she had confided about the loss in London had intimated me I had sworn to secrecy before not to divulge the information. I continue to pretend ignorance of what has been ailing her and almost confining her to her bed for months. In addition, my son had also informed me that while I was away on consultation in Abuja, Mrs Wigwe had told him that somebody had hinted her that I might have purchased a house in Nairobi. She had said that she was investigating it and if found to be true, will engage the services of a lawyer to ensure that her name was appended to the property. She thus began calling my staff in the Embassy but got no positive response. She quizzed Nelson and found out he knew nothing of any such enterprise. She could be scheming to lay her hands on the property if it is indeed true. It is instructive that on the night when her spine was broken and she had severe waist pain, Mrs Wigwe remembered to mention the house issue among the tirade of words that were flying out of her mouth like a practised actor. Her greed would not allow her to note that she alone owns the house in London and in her village which was built entirely with my money while serving in Tokyo. Considering the odds staring her in the face as my tenure in Nairobi draws to a close, Mrs Wigwe is in dire need of a way out.



My daughter Ada was discharged from hospital after several x-rays revealed no damages to her bruised hand. Mrs Wigwe remained in hospital until Saturday 14th morning when Yvonne sent me a text to say that she had been discharged and I needed to pay the bills. I was in church when the text came and I went straight to the hospital and paid the bill of ksh 27,800 (about $330) and even took her x-ray result. She had only taken the pain killer prescribed for her and had not taken the x-ray result. Her spinal injury was miraculously healed within 3 days. From hospital she went straight to Yvonne’s home and remained there. I travelled to Abuja on Wednesday 18th and came back on Wednesday 25th. When she heard news of my travel, she returned to the Residence as I was to learn later. As I had locked my bedroom from the front door, I was shocked to discover that my drawers had been ransacked and 1 (one) Rolex watch, 1(one) Accurate gold watch and 1(one) gold ring with precious stone had been stolen with their cases. Mrs Wigwe is the only one with a key to the connecting door to my room. She prevented me from keeping a spare. Only she has absolute access to my bedroom and she enters there at will including when am fast asleep. Why did she have to remove those items if not to sell them and make some extra cash from them? Secondly, when I entered the pantry next to my bedroom, I noticed that 1 (one) trunk box and over 10 (ten) empty suitcases belonging to me had disappeared and the room was desolate. The trunk box was full of my stuff but she had recklessly emptied them and forcefully repacked them into the other two boxes. I asked the houseboy who confirmed that Mrs Wigwe had packed all her personal belongings into the suitcases and locked them in the store downstairs. I went downstairs and noticed that she had removed her pictures from the various room walls. In spite of all these, I found Mrs Wigwe very much living in the house, locked up as usual in her bedroom!



On the same day that I had returned to Nairobi having flown with the night flight from Lagos, I went to work and a little after 11 am I received a call from an unfamiliar number. It was a man from Radio Africa, publishers of the Star. He mumbled something about a letter with very bad photographs of a woman sent in by a woman lawyer in respect to my wife. I was shocked but I told him that I recall that Mrs Wigwe had sent me a text on 12th May saying that I would soon hear from her lawyer. She had also told me that she was going to send pictures around. I instantly denied inflicting any such injuries as he was describing and requested him to call me back so we could set up a meeting to discuss the letter since I who was supposed to be the accused received no such letter from any lawyer. He hung up. The following day, very early in the morning, I could hear movement from Mrs Wigwe’s room and I could hear that she had ran downstairs and back upstairs. As I went into the bathroom, a friend called me and advised me to check out the Star newspaper. I ran downstairs to pick up the newspapers of the day from the front door only to discover that Mrs Wigwe had earlier picked them and returned to her room.



When I finally saw a copy of the paper in my office, I was aghast at the strange photos of Mrs Wigwe and her “battered face” and worse still to read of severe injuries to her “spine” which according to the report could leave her paralysed! I was also shocked that the story of how the argument started had been shamelessly and fraudulently altered. I was shocked to read that my two children took her to hospital. I was shocked to hear that I had beaten her up in 2008 because I had brought women to the Residence. And many other concoctions of our story over the years completed my day of mystery and entry into the world of absolute scandal and blackmail, with intent to extort money from me.


[U]CONCLUSION[/U]

I affirm on my honour that I am not a wife beater. I affirm that in the many years that I have known and lived with Mrs Wigwe, she has always been the aggressor. That Mrs Wigwe is prone to using her fists first rather than engage in a debate or an argument to prove her case. If anyone is guilty of violence in my home, it is Mrs Wigwe. If anyone is a victim of domestic violence it is I. I have lost many spectacles over the years following Mrs Wigwe’s direct hit on my face. I sleep every night afraid that she may enter my room and stab or strangle me in my sleep. I am for this reason half awake all night. I do not take phone calls when I enter the Residence. Every call I take is suspected to be from a woman who must also be my girlfriend. So even for official calls from colleagues or from my host government or my own government, I have to go downstairs where she cannot hear that I am making a call. On some occasion when I would have fallen asleep and had forgotten to turn the television set off, she had stormed into my bedroom with lights blazing, to accuse me of making a call. On such occasions, I normally summon all the humility and composure in me to endure the unwarranted interruption of my sleep in order not to provoke an argument. Mrs Wigwe removes the photographs of people she does not like from the album of official events organised by the Embassy. She had also asked that DVDs be edited to remove the people she no longer considered as friends or people she said did not greet her in a respectful way or people whose affinity to me could not be sufficiently established. Most recently, she abused officials of the Association of Nigerian Women in Kenya (ANWIK) and prevented me from attending the Nigerian Family Fun Day on Easter Saturday 23rd April 2011, organized by the women because she was angry that ANWIK which is registered with the High Commission did not consult and get her approval before approaching the Embassy. The women had apologised and pleaded and even bribed her with a free special dress which she had accepted, but in vain they pleaded. On the day of the event we were not there and my colleague from Ghana had to stand in for me!



On the level of public conduct, Mrs Wigwe has so intimidated and assaulted many people in Nairobi, men and women and staff of the High Commission alike that the High Commission no longer holds dinners, luncheons and other mandatory functions in the Residence. If in doubt, please ask around Nairobi. Mrs Wigwe has assaulted and abused so many people at public gatherings in Nairobi that people fear to greet me when we meet at public functions. Mrs Wigwe hardly supports me in my work. Although she struggles to have a copy my weekly programme and quarrels when my staffs forget to leave a copy for her, she often criticises me for attending too many functions. When people commend me for the work that I do she feels offended and often complains that I am the reason why people don’t notice her. I have tried in vain to encourage her to do more social work or to consider doing a post graduate course in any of the universities in Nairobi, as a way of keeping her occupied and fulfilled. But after three years living in Nairobi, she has not added any educational value to her degree.



On relations with staff of the Mission, Mrs Wigwe is a constant irritant. She considers herself as the ambassador and I her weak deputy. She calls staff and directs them on what to do. She intimidates the local staff and threatens to sack them and when I refuse to do so, we quarrel.


Mrs Wigwe is in dire need of psychiatric examination or what religious persons may call spiritual deliverance, but over the many years and on each occasion when I or those close to us have advised her to do so, she had always ended up insulting us. But this woman needs help. Every woman who shakes hands with Dr Wigwe is a threat to Mrs Wigwe. Even my female colleague ambassadors have not been spared. Mrs Wigwe’s ten finger nails are painted and coloured differently ranging from blue, red, brown, and gold to yellow. A different colour and pattern for each finger nail. Everybody sees something funny in that especially for a woman her age and status, but only Mrs Wigwe sees it as most fashionable and chic.



Mrs Wigwe is desperate seeing that my posting is fast coming to an end. She badly needs money. She set me up and used me as a pawn by destroying me knowing that we were never going to be husband and wife again after Nairobi. Our coming together was only for the sake of sharing in the glamour and glory of high office. That was the motivating factor for her uncharacteristic concern for my welfare on that night of the 11th and that was why she refused to believe either I or her daughter and instead proceeded to generate an argument using provocative language. She had obviously concluded that Dr Wigwe must not be allowed to leave Nairobi with honours on his back. That was the plot and she found a willing accomplice who introduced her to a woman lawyer who is a friend to the Editor of the junk newspaper otherwise called the Star. That is how the Star has come to champion this fake and fraudulent story in an attempt to help the friend of a friend in her most difficult time of financial ruin and imminent suicide.


My daughter, Adanne and son Nelson Ikenna, had stormed the Star newspaper offices to protest the falsehood the Editor so shamelessly carried in her paper. The Editor had confessed to my children that she and the lawyer were actually friends. Two quality newspapers in Kenya namely the Nation and the Standard had refused to carry the junk story. Nelson has further made a comprehensive statement to the Diplomatic Police, where he had met the Residence Security guard (name withheld) who had witnessed the actions of Mrs Wigwe on the night of the event and had struggled in vain with the Cook and my son Nelson to restrain Mrs Wigwe, with a “seriously damaged back and spine.” Mrs Wigwe had coached, coaxed and incited him to misinform the police about what happened in order to make her story credible but fortunately for Truth and Justice and fortunately for the millions of men like me all over the world who are silently suffering and living under the Tyranny of a Woman, who are Living in Bondage, who are emotionally and physically abused and assaulted on a daily basis by their wives, who are forbidden to bring their relatives to the house, who are forbidden to bring visitors to the home, who are impoverished by gluttonous and greedy wives, the Christian and God fearing Guard refused to be intimidated. May the Truth prevail.



Violence against Men is real and must be stopped. The stereotyping of men as being responsible for domestic violence has gone too far and has damaged permanently the reputation of so many good men. Many men have lost their lives or have been forced to commit suicide because of over domineering and manipulative women. The female predators move on with glee to their next victim. Mrs Wigwe has proven beyond doubt my long held beliefs that “Truth is a lie repeated three times,” and another which says that “He lies often who cries often.”



CWW

Dr Chijioke Wilcox Wigwe

Dated this 30th day of May 2011 at Nairobi, Republic of Kenya

I know "most" NL peeps are just too lazy to read anything longer than two lines but l strongly appeal to everyone bashing this man to P-L-E-A-S-E read the man's side of the story first, FOR THE SAKE OF FAIRNESS, before condemning him. Thats only fair, abi?

Pay special attention to that "blood".
Anyone that have ever been injured will know that "under gravity" blood or any liquid will naturally flow downwards.
Go back to the womans pictures and tell me if you dont seen signs that it was "deliberately splashed and rubbed all over her face" for maximum effects!

What does that tell you (since it was intended for publication in a Newspaper!)

*Again, this woman is a U.K based Lawyer! If she were the innocent she claims to be, you think it will cost her anything to get full custody of those children? How come they prefferred staying with their "Gorilla father"?

*Again, when you read the man's account (well corroborated by other embassy staffers) you will notice that this is not the firt time she has beaten someone and she was actually deported from Japan on account of her vicious violent nature!

*Again, ask yourself: Why would the children join-up is removing her from their Residence, on the day of this last wahala? Why did they not "put their father in check or remove him instead (Recall that children would naturally side the Mum in a case of any aggression between Dad and Mum)?

Okay, l dont want to spoil your fun, go and read it yourself and make your own deductions.
*Ask yourself: What manner of woman (still married) would bring a Nigger lover into her matrimonial home, in the presence of her children?
No big deal, right?

BTW: I do not condone violence on anyone (woman or a man, it does not matter). NO ONE SHOULD RAISE THEIR HAND AGAINST A MAN, NOT JUST A WOMAN afterall, WE ARE ALL EQUAL

But lets call a spade, a spade and this "herd mentality" of blaming a man, without hearing from him also, for the sake of fairness, is sickening and women take advantage of it all the time!

There is definitely something wrong with the psyche of most Nigerians!
*I understand that there are "men" that want to be @politically correct and accepted" by the society and such men will jointhe bandwagon to condemn other men.
*I also understand that there are women apologist among men, for whatever reason.

But what l dont understand is these "bandwagon effect" of beating a man when he is down! I dont understand how supposedly intelligent people cannot fathom the cliche that "You cannot and should not give judgement until you hear from the other side".

Finally, the Ambassador himself has written a Public letter, stating the account of events as they happened.

be warned, it is long (as you would expect in a family issue) but PLEASE take your time to read and digest it till the end.
particularly, note
1.) the position taken by the woman's adult son
2.) the possibility that those blood were "smeared around" to give "effect" since they dont "run down vertically" as blood would normally flow.
3.) The woman has a history of violence
4.) She was the first to bring-in a lover, into their family home in UK.

Response To Allegations Of Wife Battering Against Me, Dr Chijioke Wigwe, By Mrs Tess Iyi Wigwe As Published By The Star Newspaper On 26th May 2011

From Vibe Weekly

Background

I married Tess Iyi Wigwe (nee Oniga) under native law and custom on 9th April 1978. The girl I married was famous for her temper and fighting ability. With my gentle and unassuming nature, I honestly believed that the sharp contrast in our characters could neutralize and complement each other. It was a grave error of judgment.alt

I joined the Nigerian Foreign Service in April 1984 after teaching at the University of Jos for some years. My first posting in 1986 was to Tokyo, Japan. I was in charge of Commercial and Trade Matters. One night in July 1988, I took my female colleague from another Embassy out for dinner. It was actually the first outing. After dinner, I took her in my car in order to drop her off at a train station. As we drove through town, a car which I quickly recognised as mine (I owned 2 cars) and being driven by Mrs Wigwe pulled up beside us at a traffic light. Mrs Wigwe hurled air freshener bottles and any other objects she could find in the car to hit us. I later came down from the vehicle and explained to her who the lady was. But she did not believe me and instead chased me through the city shouting abuses at us and throwing objects at us. When I got to a train station, I opened the door and let the lady out. Mrs Wigwe abandoned her car in the middle of the road causing a big jam as she ran after the lady. She caught up with her and after interrogating her, seriously assaulted her, and beat her so mercilessly using the woman’s umbrella that the woman passed out. Mrs Wigwe fearing that the lady was dead fled the scene taking with her the woman’s hand bag. Good Samaritans took the lady to hospital where she spent one month in intensive care. I was made to pay the woman’s hospital bills. The morning after the attack, Mrs Wigwe traced me to the Embassy where I had taken shelter and took a huge stone and smashed the windscreen of the car to pieces. Mrs Wigwe never admitted to taking the handbag and its contents. However, months later, the wife of a colleague with whom she had left the handbag, confessed. This gross act of violence visited on an innocent woman, so angered the Nigerian Ambassador and the entire staff that it was decided that Mrs Wigwe should be punished severely to deter other wives with such inclinations. Accordingly, she was suspended from post for 3 months and repatriated to Nigeria by the Embassy in October 1988. She spent a total of 6 months at home coming back only in April 1989 when my posting came to an abrupt end following the decision of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs to recall over 150 officers worldwide who had spent 24 months and above at post in the wake of the structural adjustment programme of the government of the day.

That premature recall had a serious psychological impact on my very young family of 4 and I decided to take a one year study leave at own expense ostensibly to pursue a post-graduate diploma in journalism in London, but strategically, to insulate our children from the disruptive effects of the unpredictable posting policy of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. I therefore took my family along with me at great cost. When I left England in February 1992, I left my family behind. In 1993 I was posted to Warsaw, Poland but my family remained in London for the sake of the children’s and Mrs Wigwe’s education. Having learnt a bitter lesson from Tokyo, I unilaterally decided that Mrs Wigwe must not live with me at post in Warsaw. Instead, I encouraged her quest for higher education since she had only secondary education when I married her. She graduated from Middlesex University in July 1998. I paid her fees through university from 1993 and law school. At the end of my posting in October 1998, I returned to Nigeria. The family, now well established and settled, remained in London. Between 1998 and 1999 I made regular visits to the family. In November 1999, Mrs Wigwe visited me in Abuja and we travelled to her home town. We had a very serious misunderstanding. We returned to Abuja and she travelled back to London. When she returned to London after two weeks, she informed me that she no longer wished for me to come to London as previously planned to spend the Christmas and New Year holidays. All my efforts to reach her by telephone, fax and mail were unsuccessful. The situation continued until 2002 when on transiting London en route New York for an official assignment in July 2002, I discovered that Mrs Wigwe had brought her male lover, a Nigerian of Yoruba tribe, to live with her and the children in the family house. The children told me how they had bitterly resented her and her lover. But she ignored the children and co-habited with her boyfriend in the family house for close to a year. To all intents and purposes, we were still husband and wife; we were not even officially separated! It was then I knew the reason why I had been barred from visiting the family since 1999. Consequently, and bruising from the humiliation she had bestowed on me and the children in particular, I hastily remarried in December 2002. I married my colleague in the service whom I had not actually known for more than six months. By mutual consent in December 2006, we decided to separate amicably and to remain friends which we are to date. As the marriage had no children it was quite easy for us to part. I remained a bachelor.

Following my nomination as ambassador in September 2007, I called Mrs Wigwe on phone to offer her an olive branch and to ask her to join me, if she so wished, to associate with my new appointment. It was another grave error of judgment. Although I never intended that we should live together under the same roof again as husband and wife given our antecedents and the coldness of feelings that mutually existed between us after many years of separate lives. I was only prepared for her to have a sense of belonging and attachment to my new status considering also that we have 5 children together. I thought the honour was due to her. She accepted and travelled to see me in Abuja in April 2008. Our first encounter after many years, proved to me and I guess to her, that we could truly no longer call ourselves husband and wife. Nevertheless and much to my shock and deep apprehension, she decided to take a leave of absence for 3 years from her employer in London to join me in residence in Nairobi. She insisted that I should take over her monthly expenditures in London including an ongoing mortgage for the family house I had myself helped her to buy in 2004 after she was on the verge of losing it due to lack of funds to meet her housing loan requirements. I did this in spite of not being married to her. I did it for the sake of the children. I could not contest her decision to come and live with me in Nairobi thus I let her come. But, it was clear as crystal that our differences and her mistrust of me and our mutual dislike for each other’s company were insoluble but above all that our long evaporated love would never come back. Thus, we have been living in separate bedrooms connected by an inner door that is firmly and permanently locked from her side of the border. We decided to live with as minimal contact with each other as we could manage. Because she often refused to open her door, we developed the art of communication by notes pushed under the door. She liked it so much as it often allowed her to state her endless money requests without having to justify them. We hardly engage in conversations except when she needs money. Our irregular engagements in the act of conversation often end up in a quarrel. In public we manage to present a united front but those who are close to us know that we were only putting up appearances. We did fairly well and were just longing for the end of my tenure as ambassador so that we could resume forever our separate lives. That long hoped for time is nearly with us and hence the deep anxiety on the part of Mrs Wigwe who for 3 years has lived in reasonable comfort and financial security, with a Mercedes Benz car and a driver to complement her status. The end of my tenure would mean a return to financial stress and anxiety for her. Mrs Wigwe is in a desperate mood. I am reliably informed that most of the GBP 1,700 mortgage (about $2,800) that I have to cough out every month from my meagre Foreign Service allowance and remit to her account in London through my Barclays account in Nairobi, was allegedly misappropriated by someone she trusted in London and that to date the mortgage in London is in tatters and Mrs Wigwe has suffered a loss of GBP 10,000. Besides this loss, Mrs Wigwe claimed that she had lost $6,000 in cash from her bedroom in 2009 and most recently another $3,000. The houseboy then in 2009 was accused of stealing the money from Mrs Wigwe’s 24 hour locked bedroom. The servant pleaded his innocence and the money was never found and police abandoned the matter and we sacked the servant. The latest theft of $3,000 again from her heavily locked bedroom sometime this year remains a mystery. She did interrogate the new servant and even followed him to his house to interrogate his wife, but nothing came of it. Mrs Wigwe is in a desperate state financially. This is the motive for the onslaught against me in a desperate attempt to tarnish my image and reputation and to get monetary compensation that will restore her big loss and sustain her for a long time. That is why she has carefully chosen the words she used in the story that appeared in the Star where she was talking of spine and paralysis. Mrs Wigwe is an avid watcher of the television channel Crime Investigation. She hardly watches anything else. She had obviously practised and rehearsed her lines and actions for months in her premeditated assault on me on Wednesday 11th May 2011. Concerning her wish for spine injury that would lead to paralysis, I can only pray God to please graciously grant her wish so that she may truly know what it is to have spine injury.



ALLEGATION OF WIFE BATTERING

On Thursday 26th May 2011, the Star, a Nairobi based tabloid, published a story in its front page with photographs showing a badly bruised face of Mrs Tess Wigwe and an allegation that I, her husband, had inflicted those injuries on her face. It was alleged that I had beaten my wife because she had responded to a “note” from me requesting to be served food. It was alleged that I had so beaten her that she suffered injuries to her spine and she was in danger of being paralysed. Many other allegations dating back to many years then followed in her premeditated attempt to build a solid case against me, including the foolish allegation that I used to bring women to the Residence in 2008 and the blatantly false information that she left me in Nigeria in 1999 and went to England to study and live.

RESPONSE

In response to these allegations, I wish to state quite categorically that I did not beat my wife and that I did not ask for food either in writing or verbally. What happened that fateful Wednesday night was shocking to me and clearly fits into a pre-planned mould cast by the avid Crime TV watcher, I had returned home late at night after attending the launch of a new product, Go Places, by Kenya Commercial Bank which was held at the Hilton Hotel. As is my practice, I went straight to my room and began to take off my jacket. Mrs Wigwe matched into my room shouting on top of her voice (that is how she speaks to me) that if I knew I would not be eating at home, I should tell her so she does not have to prepare any meals for me. I was stunned as indeed I had been eating regularly every day when I come home from work. I took it for a joke but I saw she was going on and on and would not let me put in a word. Her loud voice attracted my daughter Ada who came over to my room. Upon sighting my daughter I told her to please convince her mother that I had been eating food I met in the fridge every day at least for the past two weeks. Mrs Wigwe was taking none of that and insisted and before I knew it she was abusing me and calling me names. I naturally got angry and told her that if she were indeed taking proper charge of her kitchen then she would have noticed that I do eat what has been prepared for me. She took offence with my comment and became agitated when I asked her when or what has prompted her sudden interest and care for my welfare.

In her characteristic manner, Mrs Wigwe lunged at me to slap me. I tried defending myself and indeed my daughter came in the way and as we tussled and jostled around the door to her own bedroom where a massive wooden shoe rack was standing, Mrs Wigwe received a cut. Once she felt blood on her right side of face, Mrs Wigwe used her right hand to rub the blood and smeared her entire face with it. She ran into her bedroom and produced a camera and in the presence of my daughter and I, Mrs Wigwe photographed herself, taking two to three shots. She was shouting that she had got me, and that the whole world was going to see her bloodied face; that she was going to send the picture to Abuja. As my daughter and I tried to push her into her room to prevent her from coming to fight me, my daughter’s hand was caught in the bedroom door and she gasped in pain. Mrs Wigwe also grabbed her phone and called her friend Yvonne to come and take her as she had been injured and bleeding. My son Nelson, who also joined in the effort to restrain Mrs Wigwe, offered to wipe the blood but Mrs Wigwe refused. With camera in hand, Mrs Wigwe ran downstairs and outside the building and for the next one hour was hurling abuses at me and shouting obscenities about me and my family and friends. It took the combined efforts of the Security Guard, the Cook and my son Nelson Ikenna to hold her back and prevent her from re-entering the house which I had now safely locked. In frustration that she could not re-enter the house, Mrs Wigwe who claimed in her report to the Star that she had suffered spinal injury, managed to wrestle with three able men and finally broke loose to carry a flower pot to smash the big glass window of the room we use as gym. She carried the flower pot and threw it at the glass window, shattering it. Not long after, her friend Yvonne arrived and together with my daughter they drove off. No ambulance was needed to convey Mrs Wigwe to hospital. Mrs Wigwe did not first rush to the Police to report the incident and show her injuries to the police. Mrs Wigwe only reported to the police on 27th May! That speaks volumes. She went to the police after people had begun to doubt her story! The first wave of shock when the story first hit the headlines had begun to give way to sombre reflection and analysis. As the children and house staff began to contradict her story, she decided it was time to make a statement to the police. She began to focus on her dual citizenship and what the British government might do for her.

Yvonne later sent me a text message saying Mrs Wigwe and daughter had been admitted at Aga Khan Hospital. I sent Mrs Wigwe a text in the morning advising her to get much needed rest. I also wanted to go and see her but she bluntly told me to keep off and to await a letter from her lawyer and to watch the news for what was going to happen to me. I had advised her to take the period to rest properly in hospital having noticed that since January she had lacked proper sleep following the devastating news of the alleged misappropriation of GBP 10,000 by her trusted friend and the “theft” of $3,000 in-house. Of course, she was not aware that my son Nelson to whom she had confided about the loss in London had intimated me I had sworn to secrecy before not to divulge the information. I continue to pretend ignorance of what has been ailing her and almost confining her to her bed for months. In addition, my son had also informed me that while I was away on consultation in Abuja, Mrs Wigwe had told him that somebody had hinted her that I might have purchased a house in Nairobi. She had said that she was investigating it and if found to be true, will engage the services of a lawyer to ensure that her name was appended to the property. She thus began calling my staff in the Embassy but got no positive response. She quizzed Nelson and found out he knew nothing of any such enterprise. She could be scheming to lay her hands on the property if it is indeed true. It is instructive that on the night when her spine was broken and she had severe waist pain, Mrs Wigwe remembered to mention the house issue among the tirade of words that were flying out of her mouth like a practised actor. Her greed would not allow her to note that she alone owns the house in London and in her village which was built entirely with my money while serving in Tokyo. Considering the odds staring her in the face as my tenure in Nairobi draws to a close, Mrs Wigwe is in dire need of a way out.

My daughter Ada was discharged from hospital after several x-rays revealed no damages to her bruised hand. Mrs Wigwe remained in hospital until Saturday 14th morning when Yvonne sent me a text to say that she had been discharged and I needed to pay the bills. I was in church when the text came and I went straight to the hospital and paid the bill of ksh 27,800 (about $330) and even took her x-ray result. She had only taken the pain killer prescribed for her and had not taken the x-ray result. Her spinal injury was miraculously healed within 3 days. From hospital she went straight to Yvonne’s home and remained there. I travelled to Abuja on Wednesday 18th and came back on Wednesday 25th. When she heard news of my travel, she returned to the Residence as I was to learn later. As I had locked my bedroom from the front door, I was shocked to discover that my drawers had been ransacked and 1 (one) Rolex watch, 1(one) Accurate gold watch and 1(one) gold ring with precious stone had been stolen with their cases. Mrs Wigwe is the only one with a key to the connecting door to my room. She prevented me from keeping a spare. Only she has absolute access to my bedroom and she enters there at will including when am fast asleep. Why did she have to remove those items if not to sell them and make some extra cash from them? Secondly, when I entered the pantry next to my bedroom, I noticed that 1 (one) trunk box and over 10 (ten) empty suitcases belonging to me had disappeared and the room was desolate. The trunk box was full of my stuff but she had recklessly emptied them and forcefully repacked them into the other two boxes. I asked the houseboy who confirmed that Mrs Wigwe had packed all her personal belongings into the suitcases and locked them in the store downstairs. I went downstairs and noticed that she had removed her pictures from the various room walls. In spite of all these, I found Mrs Wigwe very much living in the house, locked up as usual in her bedroom!

On the same day that I had returned to Nairobi having flown with the night flight from Lagos, I went to work and a little after 11 am I received a call from an unfamiliar number. It was a man from Radio Africa, publishers of the Star. He mumbled something about a letter with very bad photographs of a woman sent in by a woman lawyer in respect to my wife. I was shocked but I told him that I recall that Mrs Wigwe had sent me a text on 12th May saying that I would soon hear from her lawyer. She had also told me that she was going to send pictures around. I instantly denied inflicting any such injuries as he was describing and requested him to call me back so we could set up a meeting to discuss the letter since I who was supposed to be the accused received no such letter from any lawyer. He hung up. The following day, very early in the morning, I could hear movement from Mrs Wigwe’s room and I could hear that she had ran downstairs and back upstairs. As I went into the bathroom, a friend called me and advised me to check out the Star newspaper. I ran downstairs to pick up the newspapers of the day from the front door only to discover that Mrs Wigwe had earlier picked them and returned to her room.

When I finally saw a copy of the paper in my office, I was aghast at the strange photos of Mrs Wigwe and her “battered face” and worse still to read of severe injuries to her “spine” which according to the report could leave her paralysed! I was also shocked that the story of how the argument started had been shamelessly and fraudulently altered. I was shocked to read that my two children took her to hospital. I was shocked to hear that I had beaten her up in 2008 because I had brought women to the Residence. And many other concoctions of our story over the years completed my day of mystery and entry into the world of absolute scandal and blackmail, with intent to extort money from me.



CONCLUSION

I affirm on my honour that I am not a wife beater. I affirm that in the many years that I have known and lived with Mrs Wigwe, she has always been the aggressor. That Mrs Wigwe is prone to using her fists first rather than engage in a debate or an argument to prove her case. If anyone is guilty of violence in my home, it is Mrs Wigwe. If anyone is a victim of domestic violence it is I. I have lost many spectacles over the years following Mrs Wigwe’s direct hit on my face. I sleep every night afraid that she may enter my room and stab or strangle me in my sleep. I am for this reason half awake all night. I do not take phone calls when I enter the Residence. Every call I take is suspected to be from a woman who must also be my girlfriend. So even for official calls from colleagues or from my host government or my own government, I have to go downstairs where she cannot hear that I am making a call. On some occasion when I would have fallen asleep and had forgotten to turn the television set off, she had stormed into my bedroom with lights blazing, to accuse me of making a call. On such occasions, I normally summon all the humility and composure in me to endure the unwarranted interruption of my sleep in order not to provoke an argument. Mrs Wigwe removes the photographs of people she does not like from the album of official events organised by the Embassy. She had also asked that DVDs be edited to remove the people she no longer considered as friends or people she said did not greet her in a respectful way or people whose affinity to me could not be sufficiently established. Most recently, she abused officials of the Association of Nigerian Women in Kenya (ANWIK) and prevented me from attending the Nigerian Family Fun Day on Easter Saturday 23rd April 2011, organized by the women because she was angry that ANWIK which is registered with the High Commission did not consult and get her approval before approaching the Embassy. The women had apologised and pleaded and even bribed her with a free special dress which she had accepted, but in vain they pleaded. On the day of the event we were not there and my colleague from Ghana had to stand in for me!

On the level of public conduct, Mrs Wigwe has so intimidated and assaulted many people in Nairobi, men and women and staff of the High Commission alike that the High Commission no longer holds dinners, luncheons and other mandatory functions in the Residence. If in doubt, please ask around Nairobi. Mrs Wigwe has assaulted and abused so many people at public gatherings in Nairobi that people fear to greet me when we meet at public functions. Mrs Wigwe hardly supports me in my work. Although she struggles to have a copy my weekly programme and quarrels when my staffs forget to leave a copy for her, she often criticises me for attending too many functions. When people commend me for the work that I do she feels offended and often complains that I am the reason why people don’t notice her. I have tried in vain to encourage her to do more social work or to consider doing a post graduate course in any of the universities in Nairobi, as a way of keeping her occupied and fulfilled. But after three years living in Nairobi, she has not added any educational value to her degree.

On relations with staff of the Mission, Mrs Wigwe is a constant irritant. She considers herself as the ambassador and I her weak deputy. She calls staff and directs them on what to do. She intimidates the local staff and threatens to sack them and when I refuse to do so, we quarrel.

Mrs Wigwe is in dire need of psychiatric examination or what religious persons may call spiritual deliverance, but over the many years and on each occasion when I or those close to us have advised her to do so, she had always ended up insulting us. But this woman needs help. Every woman who shakes hands with Dr Wigwe is a threat to Mrs Wigwe. Even my female colleague ambassadors have not been spared. Mrs Wigwe’s ten finger nails are painted and coloured differently ranging from blue, red, brown, and gold to yellow. A different colour and pattern for each finger nail. Everybody sees something funny in that especially for a woman her age and status, but only Mrs Wigwe sees it as most fashionable and chic.

Mrs Wigwe is desperate seeing that my posting is fast coming to an end. She badly needs money. She set me up and used me as a pawn by destroying me knowing that we were never going to be husband and wife again after Nairobi. Our coming together was only for the sake of sharing in the glamour and glory of high office. That was the motivating factor for her uncharacteristic concern for my welfare on that night of the 11th and that was why she refused to believe either I or her daughter and instead proceeded to generate an argument using provocative language. She had obviously concluded that Dr Wigwe must not be allowed to leave Nairobi with honours on his back. That was the plot and she found a willing accomplice who introduced her to a woman lawyer who is a friend to the Editor of the junk newspaper otherwise called the Star. That is how the Star has come to champion this fake and fraudulent story in an attempt to help the friend of a friend in her most difficult time of financial ruin and imminent suicide.

My daughter, Adanne and son Nelson Ikenna, had stormed the Star newspaper offices to protest the falsehood the Editor so shamelessly carried in her paper. The Editor had confessed to my children that she and the lawyer were actually friends. Two quality newspapers in Kenya namely the Nation and the Standard had refused to carry the junk story. Nelson has further made a comprehensive statement to the Diplomatic Police, where he had met the Residence Security guard (name withheld) who had witnessed the actions of Mrs Wigwe on the night of the event and had struggled in vain with the Cook and my son Nelson to restrain Mrs Wigwe, with a “seriously damaged back and spine.” Mrs Wigwe had coached, coaxed and incited him to misinform the police about what happened in order to make her story credible but fortunately for Truth and Justice and fortunately for the millions of men like me all over the world who are silently suffering and living under the Tyranny of a Woman, who are Living in Bondage, who are emotionally and physically abused and assaulted on a daily basis by their wives, who are forbidden to bring their relatives to the house, who are forbidden to bring visitors to the home, who are impoverished by gluttonous and greedy wives, the Christian and God fearing Guard refused to be intimidated. May the Truth prevail.

Violence against Men is real and must be stopped. The stereotyping of men as being responsible for domestic violence has gone too far and has damaged permanently the reputation of so many good men. Many men have lost their lives or have been forced to commit suicide because of over domineering and manipulative women. The female predators move on with glee to their next victim. Mrs Wigwe has proven beyond doubt my long held beliefs that “Truth is a lie repeated three times,” and another which says that “He lies often who cries often.”


Comments Page: 1 2 3


posted on 05-31-2011, 11:01:52 AM
Ugochukwu
Nigerian High Commissioner to Kenya, Dr. Wigwe's Official Response to Allegations by Wife.
RESPONSE TO ALLEGATIONS OF WIFE BATTERING AGAINST ME, DR CHIJIOKE WIGWE, BY MRS TESS IYI WIGWE AS PUBLISHED BY THE STAR NEWSPAPER ON 26TH MAY 2011

Background

I married Tess Iyi Wigwe (nee Oniga) under native law and custom on 9th April 1978. The girl I married was famous for her temper and fighting ability. With my gentle and unassuming nature, I honestly believed that the sharp contrast in our characters could neutralize and complement each other. It was a grave error of judgment.



I joined the Nigerian Foreign Service in April 1984 after teaching at the University of Jos for some years. My first posting in 1986 was to Tokyo, Japan. I was in charge of Commercial and Trade Matters. One night in July 1988, I took my female colleague from another Embassy out for dinner. It was actually the first outing. After dinner, I took her in my car in order to drop her off at a train station. As we drove through town, a car which I quickly recognised as mine (I owned 2 cars) and being driven by Mrs Wigwe pulled up beside us at a traffic light. Mrs Wigwe hurled air freshener bottles and any other objects she could find in the car to hit us. I later came down from the vehicle and explained to her who the lady was. But she did not believe me and instead chased me through the city shouting abuses at us and throwing objects at us. When I got to a train station, I opened the door and let the lady out. Mrs Wigwe abandoned her car in the middle of the road causing a big jam as she ran after the lady. She caught up with her and after interrogating her, seriously assaulted her, and beat her so mercilessly using the woman’s umbrella that the woman passed out. Mrs Wigwe fearing that the lady was dead fled the scene taking with her the woman’s hand bag. Good Samaritans took the lady to hospital where she spent one month in intensive care. I was made to pay the woman’s hospital bills. The morning after the attack, Mrs Wigwe traced me to the Embassy where I had taken shelter and took a huge stone and smashed the windscreen of the car to pieces. Mrs Wigwe never admitted to taking the handbag and its contents. However, months later, the wife of a colleague with whom she had left the handbag, confessed. This gross act of violence visited on an innocent woman, so angered the Nigerian Ambassador and the entire staff that it was decided that Mrs Wigwe should be punished severely to deter other wives with such inclinations. Accordingly, she was suspended from post for 3 months and repatriated to Nigeria by the Embassy in October 1988. She spent a total of 6 months at home coming back only in April 1989 when my posting came to an abrupt end following the decision of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs to recall over 150 officers worldwide who had spent 24 months and above at post in the wake of the structural adjustment programme of the government of the day.



That premature recall had a serious psychological impact on my very young family of 4 and I decided to take a one year study leave at own expense ostensibly to pursue a post-graduate diploma in journalism in London, but strategically, to insulate our children from the disruptive effects of the unpredictable posting policy of the Ministry of Foreign Affairs. I therefore took my family along with me at great cost. When I left England in February 1992, I left my family behind. In 1993 I was posted to Warsaw, Poland but my family remained in London for the sake of the children’s and Mrs Wigwe’s education. Having learnt a bitter lesson from Tokyo, I unilaterally decided that Mrs Wigwe must not live with me at post in Warsaw. Instead, I encouraged her quest for higher education since she had only secondary education when I married her. She graduated from Middlesex University in July 1998. I paid her fees through university from 1993 and law school. At the end of my posting in October 1998, I returned to Nigeria. The family, now well established and settled, remained in London. Between 1998 and 1999 I made regular visits to the family. In November 1999, Mrs Wigwe visited me in Abuja and we travelled to her home town. We had a very serious misunderstanding. We returned to Abuja and she travelled back to London. When she returned to London after two weeks, she informed me that she no longer wished for me to come to London as previously planned to spend the Christmas and New Year holidays. All my efforts to reach her by telephone, fax and mail were unsuccessful. The situation continued until 2002 when on transiting London en route New York for an official assignment in July 2002, I discovered that Mrs Wigwe had brought her male lover, a Nigerian of Yoruba tribe, to live with her and the children in the family house. The children told me how they had bitterly resented her and her lover. But she ignored the children and co-habited with her boyfriend in the family house for close to a year. To all intents and purposes, we were still husband and wife; we were not even officially separated! It was then I knew the reason why I had been barred from visiting the family since 1999. Consequently, and bruising from the humiliation she had bestowed on me and the children in particular, I hastily remarried in December 2002. I married my colleague in the service whom I had not actually known for more than six months. By mutual consent in December 2006, we decided to separate amicably and to remain friends which we are to date. As the marriage had no children it was quite easy for us to part. I remained a bachelor.



Following my nomination as ambassador in September 2007, I called Mrs Wigwe on phone to offer her an olive branch and to ask her to join me, if she so wished, to associate with my new appointment. It was another grave error of judgment. Although I never intended that we should live together under the same roof again as husband and wife given our antecedents and the coldness of feelings that mutually existed between us after many years of separate lives. I was only prepared for her to have a sense of belonging and attachment to my new status considering also that we have 5 children together. I thought the honour was due to her. She accepted and travelled to see me in Abuja in April 2008. Our first encounter after many years, proved to me and I guess to her, that we could truly no longer call ourselves husband and wife. Nevertheless and much to my shock and deep apprehension, she decided to take a leave of absence for 3 years from her employer in London to join me in residence in Nairobi. She insisted that I should take over her monthly expenditures in London including an ongoing mortgage for the family house I had myself helped her to buy in 2004 after she was on the verge of losing it due to lack of funds to meet her housing loan requirements. I did this in spite of not being married to her. I did it for the sake of the children. I could not contest her decision to come and live with me in Nairobi thus I let her come. But, it was clear as crystal that our differences and her mistrust of me and our mutual dislike for each other’s company were insoluble but above all that our long evaporated love would never come back. Thus, we have been living in separate bedrooms connected by an inner door that is firmly and permanently locked from her side of the border. We decided to live with as minimal contact with each other as we could manage. Because she often refused to open her door, we developed the art of communication by notes pushed under the door. She liked it so much as it often allowed her to state her endless money requests without having to justify them. We hardly engage in conversations except when she needs money. Our irregular engagements in the act of conversation often end up in a quarrel. In public we manage to present a united front but those who are close to us know that we were only putting up appearances. We did fairly well and were just longing for the end of my tenure as ambassador so that we could resume forever our separate lives. That long hoped for time is nearly with us and hence the deep anxiety on the part of Mrs Wigwe who for 3 years has lived in reasonable comfort and financial security, with a Mercedes Benz car and a driver to complement her status. The end of my tenure would mean a return to financial stress and anxiety for her. Mrs Wigwe is in a desperate mood. I am reliably informed that most of the GBP 1,700 mortgage (about $2,800) that I have to cough out every month from my meagre Foreign Service allowance and remit to her account in London through my Barclays account in Nairobi, was allegedly misappropriated by someone she trusted in London and that to date the mortgage in London is in tatters and Mrs Wigwe has suffered a loss of GBP 10,000. Besides this loss, Mrs Wigwe claimed that she had lost $6,000 in cash from her bedroom in 2009 and most recently another $3,000. The houseboy then in 2009 was accused of stealing the money from Mrs Wigwe’s 24 hour locked bedroom. The servant pleaded his innocence and the money was never found and police abandoned the matter and we sacked the servant. The latest theft of $3,000 again from her heavily locked bedroom sometime this year remains a mystery. She did interrogate the new servant and even followed him to his house to interrogate his wife, but nothing came of it. Mrs Wigwe is in a desperate state financially. This is the motive for the onslaught against me in a desperate attempt to tarnish my image and reputation and to get monetary compensation that will restore her big loss and sustain her for a long time. That is why she has carefully chosen the words she used in the story that appeared in the Star where she was talking of spine and paralysis. Mrs Wigwe is an avid watcher of the television channel Crime Investigation. She hardly watches anything else. She had obviously practised and rehearsed her lines and actions for months in her premeditated assault on me on Wednesday 11th May 2011. Concerning her wish for spine injury that would lead to paralysis, I can only pray God to please graciously grant her wish so that she may truly know what it is to have spine injury.


ALLEGATION OF WIFE BATTERING

On Thursday 26th May 2011, the Star, a Nairobi based tabloid, published a story in its front page with photographs showing a badly bruised face of Mrs Tess Wigwe and an allegation that I, her husband, had inflicted those injuries on her face. It was alleged that I had beaten my wife because she had responded to a “note” from me requesting to be served food. It was alleged that I had so beaten her that she suffered injuries to her spine and she was in danger of being paralysed. Many other allegations dating back to many years then followed in her premeditated attempt to build a solid case against me, including the foolish allegation that I used to bring women to the Residence in 2008 and the blatantly false information that she left me in Nigeria in 1999 and went to England to study and live.


RESPONSE

In response to these allegations, I wish to state quite categorically that I did not beat my wife and that I did not ask for food either in writing or verbally. What happened that fateful Wednesday night was shocking to me and clearly fits into a pre-planned mould cast by the avid Crime TV watcher, I had returned home late at night after attending the launch of a new product, Go Places, by Kenya Commercial Bank which was held at the Hilton Hotel. As is my practice, I went straight to my room and began to take off my jacket. Mrs Wigwe matched into my room shouting on top of her voice (that is how she speaks to me) that if I knew I would not be eating at home, I should tell her so she does not have to prepare any meals for me. I was stunned as indeed I had been eating regularly every day when I come home from work. I took it for a joke but I saw she was going on and on and would not let me put in a word. Her loud voice attracted my daughter Ada who came over to my room. Upon sighting my daughter I told her to please convince her mother that I had been eating food I met in the fridge every day at least for the past two weeks. Mrs Wigwe was taking none of that and insisted and before I knew it she was abusing me and calling me names. I naturally got angry and told her that if she were indeed taking proper charge of her kitchen then she would have noticed that I do eat what has been prepared for me. She took offence with my comment and became agitated when I asked her when or what has prompted her sudden interest and care for my welfare.

In her characteristic manner, Mrs Wigwe lunged at me to slap me. I tried defending myself and indeed my daughter came in the way and as we tussled and jostled around the door to her own bedroom where a massive wooden shoe rack was standing, Mrs Wigwe received a cut. Once she felt blood on her right side of face, Mrs Wigwe used her right hand to rub the blood and smeared her entire face with it. She ran into her bedroom and produced a camera and in the presence of my daughter and I, Mrs Wigwe photographed herself, taking two to three shots. She was shouting that she had got me, and that the whole world was going to see her bloodied face; that she was going to send the picture to Abuja. As my daughter and I tried to push her into her room to prevent her from coming to fight me, my daughter’s hand was caught in the bedroom door and she gasped in pain. Mrs Wigwe also grabbed her phone and called her friend Yvonne to come and take her as she had been injured and bleeding. My son Nelson, who also joined in the effort to restrain Mrs Wigwe, offered to wipe the blood but Mrs Wigwe refused. With camera in hand, Mrs Wigwe ran downstairs and outside the building and for the next one hour was hurling abuses at me and shouting obscenities about me and my family and friends. It took the combined efforts of the Security Guard, the Cook and my son Nelson Ikenna to hold her back and prevent her from re-entering the house which I had now safely locked. In frustration that she could not re-enter the house, Mrs Wigwe who claimed in her report to the Star that she had suffered spinal injury, managed to wrestle with three able men and finally broke loose to carry a flower pot to smash the big glass window of the room we use as gym. She carried the flower pot and threw it at the glass window, shattering it. Not long after, her friend Yvonne arrived and together with my daughter they drove off. No ambulance was needed to convey Mrs Wigwe to hospital. Mrs Wigwe did not first rush to the Police to report the incident and show her injuries to the police. Mrs Wigwe only reported to the police on 27th May! That speaks volumes. She went to the police after people had begun to doubt her story! The first wave of shock when the story first hit the headlines had begun to give way to sombre reflection and analysis. As the children and house staff began to contradict her story, she decided it was time to make a statement to the police. She began to focus on her dual citizenship and what the British government might do for her.



Yvonne later sent me a text message saying Mrs Wigwe and daughter had been admitted at Aga Khan Hospital. I sent Mrs Wigwe a text in the morning advising her to get much needed rest. I also wanted to go and see her but she bluntly told me to keep off and to await a letter from her lawyer and to watch the news for what was going to happen to me. I had advised her to take the period to rest properly in hospital having noticed that since January she had lacked proper sleep following the devastating news of the alleged misappropriation of GBP 10,000 by her trusted friend and the “theft” of $3,000 in-house. Of course, she was not aware that my son Nelson to whom she had confided about the loss in London had intimated me I had sworn to secrecy before not to divulge the information. I continue to pretend ignorance of what has been ailing her and almost confining her to her bed for months. In addition, my son had also informed me that while I was away on consultation in Abuja, Mrs Wigwe had told him that somebody had hinted her that I might have purchased a house in Nairobi. She had said that she was investigating it and if found to be true, will engage the services of a lawyer to ensure that her name was appended to the property. She thus began calling my staff in the Embassy but got no positive response. She quizzed Nelson and found out he knew nothing of any such enterprise. She could be scheming to lay her hands on the property if it is indeed true. It is instructive that on the night when her spine was broken and she had severe waist pain, Mrs Wigwe remembered to mention the house issue among the tirade of words that were flying out of her mouth like a practised actor. Her greed would not allow her to note that she alone owns the house in London and in her village which was built entirely with my money while serving in Tokyo. Considering the odds staring her in the face as my tenure in Nairobi draws to a close, Mrs Wigwe is in dire need of a way out.



My daughter Ada was discharged from hospital after several x-rays revealed no damages to her bruised hand. Mrs Wigwe remained in hospital until Saturday 14th morning when Yvonne sent me a text to say that she had been discharged and I needed to pay the bills. I was in church when the text came and I went straight to the hospital and paid the bill of ksh 27,800 (about $330) and even took her x-ray result. She had only taken the pain killer prescribed for her and had not taken the x-ray result. Her spinal injury was miraculously healed within 3 days. From hospital she went straight to Yvonne’s home and remained there. I travelled to Abuja on Wednesday 18th and came back on Wednesday 25th. When she heard news of my travel, she returned to the Residence as I was to learn later. As I had locked my bedroom from the front door, I was shocked to discover that my drawers had been ransacked and 1 (one) Rolex watch, 1(one) Accurate gold watch and 1(one) gold ring with precious stone had been stolen with their cases. Mrs Wigwe is the only one with a key to the connecting door to my room. She prevented me from keeping a spare. Only she has absolute access to my bedroom and she enters there at will including when am fast asleep. Why did she have to remove those items if not to sell them and make some extra cash from them? Secondly, when I entered the pantry next to my bedroom, I noticed that 1 (one) trunk box and over 10 (ten) empty suitcases belonging to me had disappeared and the room was desolate. The trunk box was full of my stuff but she had recklessly emptied them and forcefully repacked them into the other two boxes. I asked the houseboy who confirmed that Mrs Wigwe had packed all her personal belongings into the suitcases and locked them in the store downstairs. I went downstairs and noticed that she had removed her pictures from the various room walls. In spite of all these, I found Mrs Wigwe very much living in the house, locked up as usual in her bedroom!



On the same day that I had returned to Nairobi having flown with the night flight from Lagos, I went to work and a little after 11 am I received a call from an unfamiliar number. It was a man from Radio Africa, publishers of the Star. He mumbled something about a letter with very bad photographs of a woman sent in by a woman lawyer in respect to my wife. I was shocked but I told him that I recall that Mrs Wigwe had sent me a text on 12th May saying that I would soon hear from her lawyer. She had also told me that she was going to send pictures around. I instantly denied inflicting any such injuries as he was describing and requested him to call me back so we could set up a meeting to discuss the letter since I who was supposed to be the accused received no such letter from any lawyer. He hung up. The following day, very early in the morning, I could hear movement from Mrs Wigwe’s room and I could hear that she had ran downstairs and back upstairs. As I went into the bathroom, a friend called me and advised me to check out the Star newspaper. I ran downstairs to pick up the newspapers of the day from the front door only to discover that Mrs Wigwe had earlier picked them and returned to her room.



When I finally saw a copy of the paper in my office, I was aghast at the strange photos of Mrs Wigwe and her “battered face” and worse still to read of severe injuries to her “spine” which according to the report could leave her paralysed! I was also shocked that the story of how the argument started had been shamelessly and fraudulently altered. I was shocked to read that my two children took her to hospital. I was shocked to hear that I had beaten her up in 2008 because I had brought women to the Residence. And many other concoctions of our story over the years completed my day of mystery and entry into the world of absolute scandal and blackmail, with intent to extort money from me.


[U]CONCLUSION[/U]

I affirm on my honour that I am not a wife beater. I affirm that in the many years that I have known and lived with Mrs Wigwe, she has always been the aggressor. That Mrs Wigwe is prone to using her fists first rather than engage in a debate or an argument to prove her case. If anyone is guilty of violence in my home, it is Mrs Wigwe. If anyone is a victim of domestic violence it is I. I have lost many spectacles over the years following Mrs Wigwe’s direct hit on my face. I sleep every night afraid that she may enter my room and stab or strangle me in my sleep. I am for this reason half awake all night. I do not take phone calls when I enter the Residence. Every call I take is suspected to be from a woman who must also be my girlfriend. So even for official calls from colleagues or from my host government or my own government, I have to go downstairs where she cannot hear that I am making a call. On some occasion when I would have fallen asleep and had forgotten to turn the television set off, she had stormed into my bedroom with lights blazing, to accuse me of making a call. On such occasions, I normally summon all the humility and composure in me to endure the unwarranted interruption of my sleep in order not to provoke an argument. Mrs Wigwe removes the photographs of people she does not like from the album of official events organised by the Embassy. She had also asked that DVDs be edited to remove the people she no longer considered as friends or people she said did not greet her in a respectful way or people whose affinity to me could not be sufficiently established. Most recently, she abused officials of the Association of Nigerian Women in Kenya (ANWIK) and prevented me from attending the Nigerian Family Fun Day on Easter Saturday 23rd April 2011, organized by the women because she was angry that ANWIK which is registered with the High Commission did not consult and get her approval before approaching the Embassy. The women had apologised and pleaded and even bribed her with a free special dress which she had accepted, but in vain they pleaded. On the day of the event we were not there and my colleague from Ghana had to stand in for me!



On the level of public conduct, Mrs Wigwe has so intimidated and assaulted many people in Nairobi, men and women and staff of the High Commission alike that the High Commission no longer holds dinners, luncheons and other mandatory functions in the Residence. If in doubt, please ask around Nairobi. Mrs Wigwe has assaulted and abused so many people at public gatherings in Nairobi that people fear to greet me when we meet at public functions. Mrs Wigwe hardly supports me in my work. Although she struggles to have a copy my weekly programme and quarrels when my staffs forget to leave a copy for her, she often criticises me for attending too many functions. When people commend me for the work that I do she feels offended and often complains that I am the reason why people don’t notice her. I have tried in vain to encourage her to do more social work or to consider doing a post graduate course in any of the universities in Nairobi, as a way of keeping her occupied and fulfilled. But after three years living in Nairobi, she has not added any educational value to her degree.



On relations with staff of the Mission, Mrs Wigwe is a constant irritant. She considers herself as the ambassador and I her weak deputy. She calls staff and directs them on what to do. She intimidates the local staff and threatens to sack them and when I refuse to do so, we quarrel.


Mrs Wigwe is in dire need of psychiatric examination or what religious persons may call spiritual deliverance, but over the many years and on each occasion when I or those close to us have advised her to do so, she had always ended up insulting us. But this woman needs help. Every woman who shakes hands with Dr Wigwe is a threat to Mrs Wigwe. Even my female colleague ambassadors have not been spared. Mrs Wigwe’s ten finger nails are painted and coloured differently ranging from blue, red, brown, and gold to yellow. A different colour and pattern for each finger nail. Everybody sees something funny in that especially for a woman her age and status, but only Mrs Wigwe sees it as most fashionable and chic.



Mrs Wigwe is desperate seeing that my posting is fast coming to an end. She badly needs money. She set me up and used me as a pawn by destroying me knowing that we were never going to be husband and wife again after Nairobi. Our coming together was only for the sake of sharing in the glamour and glory of high office. That was the motivating factor for her uncharacteristic concern for my welfare on that night of the 11th and that was why she refused to believe either I or her daughter and instead proceeded to generate an argument using provocative language. She had obviously concluded that Dr Wigwe must not be allowed to leave Nairobi with honours on his back. That was the plot and she found a willing accomplice who introduced her to a woman lawyer who is a friend to the Editor of the junk newspaper otherwise called the Star. That is how the Star has come to champion this fake and fraudulent story in an attempt to help the friend of a friend in her most difficult time of financial ruin and imminent suicide.


My daughter, Adanne and son Nelson Ikenna, had stormed the Star newspaper offices to protest the falsehood the Editor so shamelessly carried in her paper. The Editor had confessed to my children that she and the lawyer were actually friends. Two quality newspapers in Kenya namely the Nation and the Standard had refused to carry the junk story. Nelson has further made a comprehensive statement to the Diplomatic Police, where he had met the Residence Security guard (name withheld) who had witnessed the actions of Mrs Wigwe on the night of the event and had struggled in vain with the Cook and my son Nelson to restrain Mrs Wigwe, with a “seriously damaged back and spine.” Mrs Wigwe had coached, coaxed and incited him to misinform the police about what happened in order to make her story credible but fortunately for Truth and Justice and fortunately for the millions of men like me all over the world who are silently suffering and living under the Tyranny of a Woman, who are Living in Bondage, who are emotionally and physically abused and assaulted on a daily basis by their wives, who are forbidden to bring their relatives to the house, who are forbidden to bring visitors to the home, who are impoverished by gluttonous and greedy wives, the Christian and God fearing Guard refused to be intimidated. May the Truth prevail.



Violence against Men is real and must be stopped. The stereotyping of men as being responsible for domestic violence has gone too far and has damaged permanently the reputation of so many good men. Many men have lost their lives or have been forced to commit suicide because of over domineering and manipulative women. The female predators move on with glee to their next victim. Mrs Wigwe has proven beyond doubt my long held beliefs that “Truth is a lie repeated three times,” and another which says that “He lies often who cries often.”



CWW

Dr Chijioke Wilcox Wigwe

Dated this 30th day of May 2011 at Nairobi, Republic of Kenya

Of course, some will still give a Dog a bad name, just to hang it.

And whats gonna happen to my neighbor, Baba Risi, 7 children from ONE WIFE!

He's always quarreling with his other neighbor who he calls a polygamist!
That one has TWO wives but three children!

I guess either way, UN must settle their matta, once and for life!

BTW: My own Mum had six kids and the least one (age-wise and educationally), just finished his Masters Degree in Chemical Engineering, from a Swedish University!
So, Whats the Crac about having two kids?
Sheer Nonsense and plane idleness.

Or have you not seen a family with just two kids and both of them are truants?
Peeps need to think deeply before jumping to conclusions.

Please! Stop all this Virginity talk, cant remember how long l lost mine!

How l wish l were a woman!
I will be whatever l want, get whatever l want, do whatever l want, WITH MY HUSBAND!

And l will not even have to "contend or struggle" with him!
Its called "a wise woman's wisdom".

Until all this "muscle-flexing" women learn this wisdom, they will just be running for pillar to post and go through life, struggling and unhappy!
Too bad!

@Egab gaal.
Any new tricks to use on Gaari today? I use ice cubes instead of chilled water.
The noise from the rocks, made it amusing!

From what l have read so far, l can conclude that most Nigerians are SELF-HATING!

Question is WHY?

Like someone said" Do you think that Police woman would have Shot her to DEATH (not incapacitate, as in shoot on leg or shoulder!) IF SHE WERE A WHITE WOMAN?

GO FIGURE!
Mind you, I do not advocate violence towards a fellow man, talk less of an officer of the state.

BTW: For those ignoramus yarning rubbish, if you live "legally" in the UK or anywhere in Europe, there are "LAWS, RULES, OPPORTUNITIES, RESTRICTIONS" which apply to you, regardless of your "Skin color" or where  you came from!
Do you think those paying her are stewpid or they just like to dash out awoof money?.
Take note, German citizens also go to the job centre! It is a temporary pay meant to alleviate the suffering of someone who is job hunting (not leave them to die, as is common practice in Naija )

A life is still a life, regardless of whether it is Nigerian or black.
Insane People are NOT responsible for their behavior. That is standard Practice.

Why are peeps not even considering the fact the woman could be SICK UPSTAIRS or which normal human will:
1) Carry an 11inches Knife out of their house, in a bag, to a public place, aside with a premeditated intention to kill?
2.)Which normal human-being will draw a knife and stab an officer, when asked a simple request like "Identify yourself"?
Doesn't add-up, IMAO

Again, One poster blamed her attitude on Nigerian Men!
How ridiculous can some of these women feminist be!

@lagbaja.

Most Landlord tries to cover this cost by asking for a 2 year rent (still running at a loss). If they have to collect only 1 year rent in advance, it then means that they must increase the rent rates by as much as 100% or more to cover their recurrent costs and still make profit.

Most landlords are making losses on their investments because most still charge as low as N500k per annum or less.

How would you or why wont you factor-in the fact that a building appreciates in value, annually and lasts an average of 50yrs. If we do the maths of #500,000 x 4flats, x 50yrs = #100,000,000:00.
Do you still think the Landlord is making a loss or thy just want to recoup all their investments in the shortest possible time (like 5yrs!)?

Cheers.

Can anyone pls paste a link to a content copy of the Bill so that we can go through?

This law is "good" but l am cautiously optimistic!
We are gradually moving to that point as obtained in other climes, where you only pay one month house rent and another one month deposit, to rent a house. Two months in all.

As per implementation, everything is a question of WILL! Does the government have the political will to enforce the law?

*Do our policemen, who will be the first point of contact (when gra-gra begins to push-push  ), have the enlightenment/awareness and the will to do that which is right before the law?
What happens when Landlord give Policeman "Egunje"?

*What happens when the "government prosecutor or even the Judge" collects bribe and refuse to give effect to a tenants right?
*What happens when Lawyer (l just seen it happen at a mediation center!)  connives with your Landlord, against you?

Having said that, let us be very clear about certain things: You cannot dictate the price of a product you dont control or own
The most basic law of Economics: Demand & Supply, will always be the most important dictator of Price!
As long as we have very acute shortage in the supply (availability) of rentable houses, even a price-control act will just drive the "house-rent business" underground and it will become a Mafia thing and our yeye Police are not sharp enough to bust such Mafioso!
I also hopes the law pays attention to areas like "ejection/determination of tenancy", right to extend "a sitting tenancy", Conditions for forfeiture of tenancy, damage to property by a tenant, No use of residential property for "any form" of business/Trade, No Animals/Livestock, No over-crowding, No Sub-letting, No modification without Landlords written consent, Surety/Guarantor for every Tenant, Payment by direct Debit and consequences if it fails e.t.c

And it will also mean that Traders/Artisans/Most self employed or people without a Guaranteed source of income, WILL NOT GET HOUSE TO RENT!

BTW: What will Fashola do, to those his "low cost housing Units" that cost an ARM and a LEG?
Should the government NOT FIRST, tackle the pricing and supply of building products like Cement, Plank, Sand, Transportation, Labour Cost, Nails, Roofing Sheet, e.t.c, before trying to legislate on the Cost of the house itself?

A time will come when no one will see any advert for house rent yet, people will be moving-in and moving-out! All will become "Underground"! When that happens, even the cost of rent will escalate further and aint nothing anyone can do about it!

@Manuelkyle

That man is an animal, HE is not fit to live!!!!!

l am still checking the "Law" for where it says: The punishment for domestic violence is DEATH!

or was this just your own form of "INTERNET VIOLENCE"?

x[b]@Eko ile[/b]
Take it easy now?
At less than 50posts on this topic, your "insult rate" is more than 50%, wetin?
Remember that opinion do defer and thats why the Poster asked for "People's Opinion".

Your own opinion is just one of many, you're entitled to it just like any one has the right to defer, heaping insults on them does not make your own opinion more intelligent or superior.,.,, ,. and its does not shut them up as well!
@beejaei Continue to try, dont stoop down low, abeg!

Having said that, Fashola has impacted people, positively and negatively, we can only hope the "positives" far out-weigh the "negatives".

Most contentious (and please dont abuse me or insult my father! ) is the issue of those Toll bridges!
Three in a single local government, on a single stretch of Road, is unprecedented, not even in Europe or America has this wonder been achieved!
(BTW: l am not awoof-loving as l do pay E-Toll regularly along my route just that l dont have to pay six times on a single road that is not even 100KM in length!)
As in Nigerian version of success, it must be driven down the people's throat or how do you explain that just to ensure that "users have no option" than to pay, Fashola needs to fence out a lot of business that have nothing to do with his quest to recoup his money back!
Ask those in advance economies and they would tell you that for every "Toll gate", the government creates alternative routes which though could extend your journey by additional 5-10mins more or give you a bumpy ride but YOU ARE NOT DEPRIVED OF A CHOICE! That fencing is criminal, to say the least and as a Lawyer, l dare say, Fashola fall my hand in that area.

On roads, he's tried so much within the first 3yrs of his administration. I dont expect him to do ALL the roads, what are the LDA chairpersons doing or dont take their own statutory allocations? (If "Ojuyobo" will allow them use it and not blackmail them out of it). Street roads are the responsibility of LGA chairpersons and thats why people erroneously criticize Fashola cos it seems the road works is not reaching the grassroots.

There are hundreds of communities without water! L dont know who the 15 waterworks is benefiting! Go to Bariga, Iwaya, Makoko, Orile, Ikorodu as big as it is, and so many other places, NO PORTABLE WATER.

Beautification projects its good, a beautiful environment has a psychological impact on people's behavior and mentality. Pass mark awarded.
Oshodi too was a success. Pass Mark awarded.

BRT: Good attempt, buses revealed their state after a few months! Most are refurbished sold/presented to us as NEW.No wonder they packed up so quickly and larmingly, my prayer is that the "Toronto Train" would not go the same way! Despite that, it was a "3-steps forward, 1-step backwards". Average pass awarded.

Shops and Entrepreneurial relations: He has built and is still building "Modern shops" for people whose "local Shops" have been knocked down but whether he is building those shops for a few "money-miss-roads" or for those Traders who really need them, is another question! How do you expect my "tailor" whose shop was knocked down, (an OND school leaver who is just trying to make some money to further his education and not burden his aged parents, same reason l decide its him l will patronize) to raise close to #400,000 to rent any of those shops, is any ones guess! (Bank loan? Which bank is that?) Fail grade on that one

Housing: He has tried building a few "Government LOW COST Housing" in places like Ikorodu but at times you wonder whether our Fashola knows how much those building are renting/selling? if he does, you will ask him why he still tags them "LOW COST" when no Teacher, Nurse, Petty Trader, Civil Servant (who has not embezzled), can rent/buy such houses! I was thinking low cost will refer to something affordable by average people like Teachers or Nurses? certainly not it for purpose.
And to think that he has been talking about "private" affordable Housing, when his own houses are far from affordable! Fail Grade awarded.

Education: He has built some schools and l have seen them with my own eyes! No bull-shaet! No long story. There is room for improvement in terms of books, more Libraries, laboratories, teaching aids. Pass grade awarded.

Health: Took too much time to sign the harmonized medical pay. Doctors too were intransigent. Overall, our Health facilities are so decayed that it will take more than one administration to put them back on a good footing. Fashola only cannot bear the blame, Tinubu was worse and played area-boy with our health for 8yrs! Fashola is stepping up the game in this area and l wish him more greaze. Jury is still out on this. Paper yet to be graded!

Others can say their own as they deem fit.
Caveat: This is just my own "personal opinion", you dont have to agree and its not forced on anyone. Dont even read it, just move on. Anyone that wants to develop "dysentery of the mouth" over this, l warn you to go elsewhere!

^^^Thanks for your contribution, its been wonderful!

"Helper" is never intended to be a slave and should never be!
As a matter of fact, a "wise woman" can easily turn the husband into a "pseudo-slave", all she needs to do is "play helpless and l need your help"!

Men like to be "macho" and to feel they are depended upon! When infact, they are the "weak and dependant"
I have a sister who winks at me everytime l want my my brother (her husband) to do something for m and he refuses!
I simply crawl to his wife (my wife, as l call her) and in  a few hours, l will get the phone call from my brother that "He had just had a rethink" and would do that thing he initially refused!
He dots over his wife you would think she is a baby (He calls her "my baby gurl".
Ask him "why" and he would say "if l dont do it for her, who would?"

Simply put, "She is wise enough to know what her husband wants"!
No arguments, no confrontation, no muscle-flexing in the home, Yet EVERYTHING IS DONE HER WAY, down to what color of car or holiday destination they go!

When l compare her with all those women who go about "challenging" their husband for every blade of grass in the household, just to prove how "woman-rights and equality" they are, l just dey laugh!

Really,  "The Fool is thirsty, in the abundance of water"!
Nice nyte.

BTW: Honey is just a substitute for Sugar, just in-case the pancreas is feeling lazy and insulin is not in enough quantity! Just being careful, you now Did l hear u say "jedi-jedi"?
Did you ever try  it with very hot beans, ice-water and cashew nuts on a hot afternoon? hmmmmm.,.,.,.,.,.

@Egba Girl

Once again, I have to say this, A wise woman builds her home and a foolish one destroys it.

HOWEVER, the men sef get their own comma o and they could also do a lot more. Ko easy lati je omokunrin/obinrin afi k'Oluwa ko wa yo.

Sometimes, l think the way God created men, HE implanted a gene in them that "allows them to submit to the whims of the woman they love"!
Why would Adam defy God, just to obey Eve? and he later confessed: its the woman YOU gave me!

Juxtaposing that with your quote above, once can safely conclude that "all a woman needs to be, to maintain her home is TO BE WISE in her relationship!

On the contrary, all a woman needs to destroy her home is to be foolish!

This shows that on the balance of probability, "the input of a man is marginal" when it comes to keeping the home! He is more like a programmed Robot at the direction of a "wise/foolish" woman!
Poor or Rich, Gentle or Brash, Quiet or Assertive, caring or uncaring, e.t.c, DEPENDING ON HOW WISE/FOOLISH THE WOMAN IS, "SHE CAN MANAGE HIM".

And going by these deductions, one can see that majority of our mothers were very, very wise and thus maintained their marriage!

But ladies of our "modern-times" see/view the wisdom of our mothers of days-gone-by, as "Weakness/Foolishness"!

Now, who is wise, who is foolish?
I want to believe men are less crude now, compared to the olden days where they see women as property thus, more women should even find it easier to keep their marriage now (now, men willingly cook, look after children, share their all with their women, make their wife their next of kin, reduce family influence in the nuclear family, e.t.c) But alas, the reverse is the case! More marriages are crashing at an even more alarming rate!

Whats the life span of an average Nigerian marriage (especially those ones where the wife is exposed to western influence, by reason of residence, association, e.t.c), l bet its less than 5yrs or ten in a few cases!

Like you said, we need to go back to the basics, at least for the sake of the children born in these marriages!
Some women even deride God for calling a woman a "helper to the man" or saying "women should submit to their husbands or that a man is the head of the family"!
They think "exposure and education" has suddenly made them wiser than God or that God is old-fashioned

You're surely one of the "blessed among women"!
Thank God say l no be "single"!

Cheers.

Okay, Egba-Girl.
I read all your thirty-something contributions on NL (including that one where you told Dayo Kanu that you're not married ).
It answered most of the personal questions l would have asked you like the ones below:

Egba-girl!
Forgive me for the questions l am about to ask you, they are very personal (l wish NL has P.M.) but please feel free NOT TO ANSWER, if you dont feel like. I will understand that.
*Are you over 40yrs? (dont want to ask ur age )
*From your number of post, you appear "new",  is this true or you're just laid back?
*Are your really from "Egba"?
*Are you married?
*Do you have kids?
*Have you ever lived outside the shores of Nigeria, particularly in Europe/USA?
*Will you have attained at least a University degree, as per education (okay, that one is ludicrous, its obvious from your post!)
*Are you TRULY FEMALE?

Why do l ask this kind of "silly" questions?

Truly, in a very long time, l have not come across such matured, intelligent and balanced contribution, on issue that bothers on relationship, on NL.
Your parents must have really imparted sound training into you (no disrespect), its like a good Tree, bearing a good fruit!
You've earn my respects, big-time!

I wish more women will borrow a leaf from you, walahi.

BTW: Garri is also my favorite!
Soak it in cold-chilling water, put honey (l avoid Sugar), sprinkle some cashew Nuts and knock it down with hot beans or some dry meat, as the case may warrant!
I dey come, make l soak some, just to appreciate you!

I still recall that my parents (especially my Mum who was the "actor" in the house! ) use to say it over-and-over again that:

Two Captains cannot steer a Ship!
And my pup will chorus after her, l am the Captain of this ship!

With time, we the children settled firmly into the HIERARCHY of things within the family!

[size=14pt]Can anyone still point to a "hierarchy"  within the family, for me?[/size]

Everyone dey speak grammar, bark orders and slap the other!
And it reminds me of the story of the Nigerian Ambassador to Kenya and that of his estranged wifey!

Thats the way the Cookie crumbles!
We gat ourselves to blame.

Is it only in Nigeria that we have Pastors?
Why are we so vain and title-chasing that something as silly as "Daddy/Mummy" should cause an eyebrow to be raised?

Are MOG not supposed to be "simple, humble and attention-avoiding" humans?

Ofcourse, if everyone calls the Pastor and his second-in-command, Daddy/Mummy, God help you, IF YOU DONT do the same, They will label you, ostracize you and make you feel bad, all in an effort to terrorize you into compliance!

BLOODY TERRORIST!!
Osama is a joke, compared to these ones!

I bet it'll soon be "Grand-dada" very soon
Sounds more eemmmmm,, ,.,. powerful!

Each day l encounter threads like this, l am "HAPPY" as it shows that a lot of Nigerians (home and abroad) are begining to read their Bible, THEMSELVES!
They are doing "personal study" and not swallowing the bull-shaet that "SOME" overzealous scammers are preaching!

I can understand the "psychological trauma" the Poster is going through!
They make you feel like you're an OUTCAST, A REBELLIOUS PERSON and that you are arrogant, simply because you dont buy into the "follow-follow" nonsense they do.

For example, in my own Redeem church (seems this scam is the new fad in RCCG churches now), two sundays ago, the Pastor (not even "My" Pastor was preaching about serving God.
He told us all that "He" was a "servant of God" and that as such "ALL CHURCH WORKERS" are his own servant!

I was livid with rage! How can l be a servant to another human-being like me? because him be Pastor, right?
Funny thing is that "some" (l keep using the word "some" because l avoid over-generalization though the population is about 90%!) of these Pastors are "NOBODY" before becoming a Pastor; Most people now see "Pastorship" as a sort of elevation to Angelic level and a "get-rich-quick" business!

After church, l pointed out the book of Mathew to him (and some Ministers) where Christ addressed us as "Brothers"!
As expected, they all descended on me like vultures and almost mobbed me (l wan spoil business for them? )

Am not fazed and l have told them that they cant "run-me-out" of this church; we built it together, my "sweat" included and it is "our property", not the Pastors personal property.
Imagine, when Pastor and his clique (a kind of cult nowadays) have "Six Special chairs" that are "very comfy and all leather" while the rest of us sit on hard surface chair and they preach for hours on end?
Last time l checked, Jesus and his disciples were so identical it took "a kiss" from Judas to identify him?

Conclusively, IT A SCAM, Period. They are reaping people off to create "personal fortune" for themselves and even boast about it, making church members feel guilty like they are not contributing enough Tithe, thats why they are not as rich as the Pastor!
Just look at that SCAM? More money, right?

God help me if l call any MOG "Daddy", and his appendage wife (imagine the hereditary structure! ) MUMMY!
Pimps. They know its wrong but they encourage it (since they will not stand on the pulpit and ban it or even discourage it) because it "elevates them" above everyone and who better can scam you, than someone "up there", close to God?

Religion is truly the opium of the people" -- Carl Marx.

@IyaBasira

It seems like everyone is calling the woman a home wrecker and a witch, all of which are true. I'm actually happy that no one is telling the poster something silly like "All men cheat so this is not a big deal".

Finally Nairalanders can agree on something, which is that the poster is a not-so-smart person whose lineage originates from the scum of the earth.

@ Poster ; Omega25Red made a very valid point; leave her already! And[b] I wish you and your new wife all the punishment that God sends to people who break their marital vows[/b].

Iya Basira, softly, softly naah! Ewo n’tepe?
Its just another made-up story y a woman, posing as a man. It’s the “order of the day on NL now”.
It gives all of us an opportunity to “bash-a-man and feel good about it”! Problem is it still does not make anyone feel good as expected!

@Rokiatu

What happened to the vow "till death do us part?"

Hmmm.,.,.,this is the first time l will see/hear a FEMALE ADVOCATE of till death do us apart!
In the other thread where one lady said she might kill her husband because of his “over-bearing attitude” about her accent, majority of the women (except Snowdrops) were advising her to “just pretend and dump him at the slightest opportunity”!
They never told her that “what happened to "till death do us apart”!
Women sha, as usual, when it suits their fancy, they will “pick and choose” which “rule” to follow!

@stagger

If anything happens, your wife will ensure that nothing happens to your kids. They are hers as well. People do not usually realize the essence of having a wife of your youth into old age. It is when you are 80 years, vulnerable and entering your second childhood that you will know why you should not ever dream of leaving your wife.

Preach it, my Pastor! But please remember to “preach it to the women also”! I mean this thing about “Not dumping The Husband of your Youth” just because he is being naughty! After all, women live up to 80yrs as well.

@Poster: My “S-I-M-P-L-E-S” advice to you is to remember that “It will be done to you, five-fold, as you have done to others”. Very “simples”. Silly He-Goat!
Whats the problem with all these women “husband snatchers”? Cant you find your own husband and leave our wives alone? 

BTW:

21 With persuasive words she led him astray;
   she seduced him with her smooth talk.
22 All at once he followed her
   like an ox going to the slaughter,
like a deer[a] stepping into a noose[b]
23 till an arrow pierces his liver,
like a bird darting into a snare,
   little knowing it will cost him his life.
25 Do not let your heart turn to her ways
   or stray into her paths.
26 Many are the victims she has brought down;
   her slain are a mighty throng.
27 Her house is a highway to the grave,
   leading down to the chambers of death.

You mean “all these” is referring to a women? Lord have mercy on women

@Digi101

Bros need anyone say more?,
The devil deceived Adam by making him believe he  didnt have what was already his (the likeness of God), Adam fell for it Hook, Line and Sinker - please dont make the same mistake.

Digi, l take exception to you “calling WOMEN, DEVIL!” Bible account says the “woman” deceived her husband, Adam, after she herself had fallen for Satan!
BTW: Why are women always the cause of “a man’s downfall”? Look at this father of two who is being bewitched by this “used”, old cargo? WTF!

@ekt-bear: You really bad-man! (takes a cane and whacks his ar*se  )

@Manny4life and Kilode?:
I agree with you that it seems like a "double jeopardy", considering especially that someone with an ignoble past (and even present) like Alao akala (A.k.a Soyoyo! ) could aspire and was a Governor!
I guess one has to think twice before taking that foreign citizenship plunge.

Having said that, l guess there is a fundamental reason for:
1.) Swearing allegiance
2.) Ensuring that only "born citizens" can aspire to be Presidents (in U.S and Nigeria as well).

And there is also this thing called "By default".
If you are "A", then by default, you CANNOT be "B".
I guess the "reasoning" behind this position is that having "sworn allegiance" to another country, (something that is both avoidable and voluntary), your "allegiance to another country (your home country) might be suspect.

In a case of war lets say between Nigeria and Ghana (for someone with dual citizenship of both, for analysis sake), if both Countries "DRAFT" you into the army: Which country do you shaft (remember your allegiance and what it stands for, legally and morally!) and on which side do you fight?

This is what "l think" the constitution is trying to avoid.

BTW: Thank God Ajumobi is not affected otherwise, l would rather "rap-shure" than see another 4yrs of "soyoyo"!

My 10cent

sure he must be afterall he was vocal and more truthful than most of the pastors and imams we have then and now.how many pastors or imams dare challenge the military head of states we had in the past ?

Pastor to Challenge Head of State?
No Head of state can be that poor?
Naaah, we dont challenge Head of State, We PRAY for them!
And they in-turn, GIVE GENEROUSLY!


Everything is as found in the good books!

BTW: Since Pastors are assumed to be "Rapshurable", how do you expect Fela to be there?
Him dey blow Nice Sax for dem baad-boys!
God bless his soul.

@lilly, 145

For him everyday comes with a new sickening attitude. He comes back from work nowadays complaining that bringing me to the UK is the biggest mistake he made in life.
Please people, what do you think I can do, at least there are no kids involved right now.

@harakiri

She has already made up her mind to divorce him and all she wants is reassurance that she's doing the "right thing" hence the reason why she informed the public that THERE ARE NO KIDS INVOLVED. This is a lady that must have promised eternal love and loyalty but now that she has "arrived", she's suddenly discovered she has "her life" to live and[b] is looking for every excuse to break the marriage.[/b] I sincerely hope all the pathetic wimps on nairaland who intend bringing "wives" from Nigeria are reading this. When will men ever learn?

@blazay

You have 2 options.

1. Play his therapist and make him a better person by 'lovingly' putting up with his abusive nature while allowing him to go through 'rehab' with your help.

Or,

2. Just get your residency and your children ASAP. . . then bail out of the marriage or relationship,

@r231

why go when you can just stick with it for couple of yrs and get what you want then screw him later

Hmm,.,.,. just watch the “progress of the thought process” some Nigerians!
I don’t pity men that “bring wifey abroad” anymore!
They are like “Southern Nigerians” who complain of being slaughtered in the North but will still troop there to raise a family! When are we going to “LEARN”?
Every young man needs to read this “responses” and learn a thing or two from it!
“USE AND DUMP” IS THE KEY WORD!
Visit abroad? YES! Resident abroad? NO
I bet this guy called hara-kiri should have been “Raptured”!
At the rate you keep hitting the nail on the head, you will be “laying hands” very soon!

By the way, can “lilly.,.145” let us HAVE HER HUSBAND’S VERSION OF THE STORY?
I am definitely fed-up with all these “one-sided” relationship stories on Nairaland and even more skeptical in that its always the women who post such! Why peeps still take it like “Gospel Truth”, beats my imagination!

Like the other one that said “He wants to slap his wife” and everyone went crazy!
Another one said “HE wants to take her money or dump her if he cant” and you can read the response! WTF?
Are men such "brutes" as women are trying very hard to portray them? Wetin?

This “accent complaint” does not add-up one bit since l am sure the man is not unaware of her accent before marriage? And what’s important about accent in London sef? Abeg, give us a better “excuse” if you want us to “encourage”!
Which “work pressure” are you talking about?
Is he the one carrying and pushing the “Jubilee underground Train” from behind?
Even people who work like slaves in Nigeria don’t have their spouse saying so, na you wey just come London, abi?

And this made Front page?!
Seun, is this what Nairaland is all about, nowadays?
You are sure loosing credible and serious people by the minute but of course, you will always have the caliber of people "it" deserves if this continues.
Just my 5cent

BTW: Poster, since there are no kids involved yet, what are you still waiting for?
Go back to Nigeria naah, or you want to “eat your cake and still have it”?

All these “imported wives” are just “sticking at it for a while so they can USE THE MAN to get papers and then DUMP HIM”!
I see, another “man-mugun” has just bitten the dust
Sorry for men of “this” times.
BTW: Since they married in Nigeria, l hope the man would come across this thread ASAP and quickly go back home and divorce her like SPEEDWAY! Because she will becomes another nightmare in his life very soon!
No child maintenance, no wifey maintenance, no house to inherit, just split and both can look for someone who appreciates them for what they are, now that here is still no "baggages" involved. Fair enough.

And this one below is by far the best advice l have ever read on Nairaland!
@Snowdrops

It's so amusing reading responses on NL whenever someone seeks advice on their personal affairs. People become so emotional; swear; use sarcasm; and attack each other even the original poster.
End of day, poster becomes confused much more than they were ab initio.
NL is no place to ask for advice on your marital life. Remember this is a global Market place with all sorts of persons and characters, the good bad and ugly. Some have far lower IQ than you or are less experienced in the subject matter. Some go around different threads posting when they should not just to add to their post counts. Some are mischievous and deliberately give the wrong counsel in other to make your life a misery or deny you of that which they lack but long to have.
If I were you poster I would avoid reading any of the comments here. You need to tackle your issues in the real world not cyber space; speak with real people, their faces which are identifiable.
it would also be nice to hear the husbands side of th story. obviously people are are making judgments based on wife complaint.
there are always too sides to a coin.

bravo 2U!

^^^^^What makes you think she is looking for HELP?
She's probably looking for ENCOURAGEMENT and by the look of it, she's got more than enough!

[size=14pt]Oruko n'ronii.[/size]

Goodluck.,,
Jonathan.,.,,

Next time, name your child "Badluck or Absalom", .,.,and see the difference!

At my "old Age", my next pikin naa "President Goodluck Jonathan" l go name am!

BTW: What does "Ebele" mean?
I bet its something like "all your opponents, fall-down-and-die"!

In Chineese, ofcourse!

I thought Sunday Church will be less boring and all me hommies can conduct church business in a more "spiritual manner"!
But l was shocked to see the same Pastor, standing there on the pulpit and trying to justify the Saturday Night-Vigil and why this Sunday did not go as "revealed" at Night Vigil!

Of course, even him was left behind and that confirmed my suspicions!

Him, like his other pimps, are FRAUDS!

Now, he CANT brag or chance me no more, WE ARE BOTH IN THE SAME CATEGORY: UN-RAP-TURE-ABLE

Rap-shure koo, Rap-shoodi nii!

Anyway, l think the thread has seen enough "hot smoke" and we should all come together and give it a befitting burial!

Am NOT looking forward to those "Toronto Coaches" at all, they are sad reminders of the Nigerian Railway!
Light Rail will actually change the face of Lagos completely!
Especially "end of the road" to those Molue around Agege Area!