erico2k2:

On the healthcare side you need to train as an healthcare assistant, its fast and easy
on the Construction side you need to get a CSCS card, its easy or you can do driving, if you have a driving licence, these are way to start earning real quick

Please share more insight on how to make money when driving please

Hello house, pls someone shared a site where u can check vehicle MOT details sometimes ago. Can it be share again please. Thank u

humbleprof19:



how do I put a registered return address on the envelope ? Do I just write the return address on it ?
Is it s normal stamp or priority stamp ?

Can someone please explain in plain E
nglish, I be JJC and don't understand

Go to Post Office, after u must have address the DVLA envelope, there is a form sent to u with the earlier pre addressed enveloped. Add the filled form to the new addressed envelope. At post office, tell the attendant that u want to buy a registered envelope (it is polythene in nature) write ur address on it for the return of ur BRP. And remember to add ur BRP to the envelope before sending. U can buy priority stamp, normal stamp or u decide to register the whole. It is better u register both the going and the returning envelope. Hope this help

humbleprof19:


Please I need clarification about sending my BRP and application.
After disregarding the initial DVLA envelope, on the new envelope do I need to get a stamp from the post office, please which stamp?

Yes u need stamp on the envelope and u can register it if u want. But make sure u put registered return self address envelope for the return of ur BRP

Kobicove:
Super story!

The African child that will lie and wrongfully accuse her father of sleeping with her has not being born!

This kind of stories are not new to those that are abroad. In UK a girl of 16 year old lied against her father just because she wanted to have her own apartment fron the council so that she can gain freedom. She lied that her father was sleeping with her and the father was arrested and during the cause of investigation the man killed himself. Only fornthe girl to say that her friends told her to lie against him and she never forsee him killing himself.

Very sad. For the OP, I will always blame the woman and at the same time not because the girls can lie against her if she doesn't belive them too.

I have a case right now, a young boy that was just brought to England from Nigeria in less than a year is lying against the father just because he want freedom which might end up destroying his life.

This story made me remember a girl i once dated and later passed on to my friend. She loved my friend so much that she narrated all her life to him and just imagine even told my guy that I was no 28 that slept with her and that made my friend to be no 29. Behold, there is this guy in the neighborhood that she has dated and did video with. The guy came threatening her and she told my guy and my guy told me. We and the father of the girl set the guy up and the guy being foolish enough played along. We first beat this guy and later handed him over to the police. The girl sabi nak sha and I guess the guy have not seen something close. He was asked to do undertaken which he gladly did and the funniest thing is that the guy's wife is very very beautiful.

AT OP, go and report to the police as advised.

I have read with kin interest all responses and I will like to tell u that I live in UK. Here in UK, some girls use this as a way of making money from the government because if ur case is prove and the govt win the case the will pay her over £20k. That's y to sleep wit a woman here involves wisdom and discrete which the guy did not applied.

Even here in UK, your own wife can accuse you of rape and if during investigation , ur sperm is seen on her private part, u automatically earn 6 to 7 years in prison.

So before u condem this guy of rape just know that he might be a victim of circumstances which me and all of u can fall victim.

I have witness a case where a 16 year old daughter accused her father of sexual assault just because she wants freedom from home and the father in question eventually killed himself only for the girl to come out and said she was lying against her father.

A friend was accused of rape and he was given house arrest for close to 6 months only for the police to realised the girl was lying against my friend after thorough investigation and the girl was eventually jailed. Note here that it was just one cctv that proved my friend right and if not for the camera, he would have being in prison. The lady was eventually jailed.

I will pray for the guy to see God face if truly he did not rape the lady.

So many experiences and to the potential JAPA, this are one of the odds of living abroad.

Chreze:


We talk about fees and financial stuff a lot on these threads (here n student), I think we need to talk more about how to manage some situation too (situations like this). A lot of people are traveling for the first time and there is this old mindset that whites are not nice or racist and all that. This old tales make people hold things inside instead of asking for help.

If I were to be in this situation, I would have knocked on the next room to explain my situation and pass the night with the person. I don’t mind knocking on 5 doors till I get someone to say “ok you can come in”.

It’s a very painful story. Anytime I think about the parents I just get sad. If you ever find yourself in any uncomfortable situation, just ask for help from anyone around you, forget about authorities at that time. You will be surprised that the oyibo you think are racist secretly wants to have a black friend. A lot of them want one now. Ask for help from your next door neighbors, your neighborhood. It’s better to ask for help than suffer. People are nicer now. Fewer racist this days, thanks to TikTok and others that have connected the world with fun and jokes.

The guy story pain me well well. Can’t imagine the parents, from having high hopes to no hopes. Very painful.

U are right, I once have such experience a d I was like wao.

My bicycle tyre got flat amd ripped out from.the rim while trying to manage it inside the Bbush while going to work early Sunday morning around 6.15am. I was so confused and ran to the nearest houses knocking dia doors so that I can atleast keep the bike safe.

Behold this woman came out to not only keep my bike but to drop me at work .

I was at amazed and couldn't keep my mind off the help through out the day.

kaylov12:


There was a post here on how you can get it faster, and it works cos I used the address as well.
Apparently, you are sending directly to the processing office whereas the address on the envelope sent to you is the mail receiving centre, hence the delay.

FAO
Leanne Jones
Head of Vehicle Input Service DVLA
Swansea
SA6 7JL.

You could enclose an envelope for special delivery for safe return of tour BRP.
I posted mine 31st Dec 2021 and received it 11th Jan 2022.

I posted that message here and someone bluff it off instantly. Thank u for trying it. It has being working like magic.

deept:


P800, i have recieved one of those. you do not owe HMRC, you only hold on to their money because they will collect. This was on my letter:

What happens next
We will automatically collect the tax by increasing the tax deducted from your wages, salary or
pension, usually in equalnstalments for 12 months from next April. Or you can pay the tax you
owe now online through your PersonalTax Account. Go to
www. gov. uldcheck-income-taxlast-year.

Thank u noted

wonlasewonimi:


Don't worry they are just sending you a notification before readjusting your tax code.

Thanknu

wonlasewonimi:


If you have a Ltd company, HMRC will definitely send you a letter/bill and the account to pay into. If you're on PAYE, they will adjust your tax code to recoup their money bit by bit.

Thanks

I am on PAYE, and I worked for another agency for 3 weeks and I told the agency to be deducting the tax when I see that they were not I heard to stop only for HMRC to send me a letter that I am owing them. Since then I have being calling to ask how I will pay back. Is dia no way I can pay them back once ?.

Good day to the everybody in house, thanks for the support always pls if someone is owing HMRC, how can u pay them back as they refuse to pick their phone.

Thank u

[quote author=Pacypatty post=108908734]

Pls kindly read my write up again. Thank you[/quote

U need to read ur message again. Is it u or ur husband as ur "I" look confusing.

SARSCoV2:



Hello! I am telling you accurately what plays in Canada. The country offers a good life and that is fixed. But taking about opportunities, you won't tell me Canada will match UK, US or Australia. I will repeat, the express entry is fraud.... And it's over the Internet. High competition for what's available. You want to ask me how I knew, I have worked and still working there. I have related with Nigerians there and still do to date. Do you know how many managers became Uber drivers in Canada? Visit the UK or USA and see what plays before you conclude. It you searching for opportunities at a fast go, Canada is not an option. You will have to repay your dues.

It's obvious this guy has not travelled out of Nigeria. Come to UK and see so many managers doing care work.

There is no country u go to to without paying ur dues before u climb the success ladder.

Common relocating from Akure to Lagos u will pay ur dues how much more travelling abroad.

My brother the trophy dia is the blue passport as he has said.

When u have it, u know u have life. Till then that guy is ur super bros.

All this boys claiming realtor up and down, how are we sure us nit karma that is following them.

I know a yahoo boy of almost 10 years steady scam that selling big big cars now. If police arrest him, he will be claiming he is a car dealer.

Karma is a batch and it's always catch up back at the end of the day.

Hello to the seniors

I want to say u people are so wonderful and I still find it difficult to believe how u guys have the time u give out to answer our unending questions.

Thank u for dedicating ur precious time to us on this thread.

God bless u all

Chukwuka16:


Bro, I’m sincerely pained with your personal problems but more pained that you brought it on this platform. This is a public platform where we come to catch cruise and of course from time-to-time express ideas/suggestions on sundry issues. This is not the platform to discuss your marital issues - your marriage deserves its privacy and respect.

Marriage is a very sacred institution and irrespective of the happenings, this is the very wrong platform to either express your situation or seek for advice for such problems as peculiar to you and your spouse. You are an adult and MUST have a network of people around you including clerics and family who should be the circle within which your discussions about your issues should reside with. You didn’t marry out of the blues and neither have you lived with your spouse without a support network – leverage this.

There are no marriages without problems but if we all come on this platform or other public platforms airing our situations, we make mockery of this very pivotal institution and show we are incapable of handling or managing situations. You are a manager of a woman and two kids and that’s your cross – not mine or anyone else here on this platform. You must take that cross and carry it ALONE and carry it well. You must do ALL it takes to make it RIGHT.

I sincerely wish you the best in your marriage but hey MAN UP. What advice do you expect from us who aren’t in your peculiar shoes or concerned parties? If you need advice on visa routes or professional advice (lawyer for instance) that’s fine to ask here, but please respect that institution, your wife, and kids. Give them that privacy please.

God bless.

I understand bro, but at times problem talked out is half solved irrespective of the opinions given.

It's left for me to seive and take what benefits me.

I must tell u that everybody here have given a sound and matured answer to my problem.

I will cross the bridge it's just a matter of time.

fatima04:


You can also start before the ADR, infact sponsors are a lot for such jobs and like someone advised, please make friends. It will help you greatly.

BTW I believe UKVI might even have issues with renewing the visa with one parent because of consent letter and custody issues. So if shits hit the fan, all of you may end back in naija if care is not taken as you also have equal power over the kids.

I will rather sign the consent letter and go back to Naija than seeing those innocent kids go back.

I understand ur statement, but doing eye for an eye will not be good for her, myself and the kids.

Nevertheless, I wil first consult my agency if they can give me sponsorship asI have being having a lot of appraiser from them. Just on Thursday they insisted on paying me bonus even when I said they should not worry because the guy that suppose to take over did not come in time making me missed 2 train.

It will end in praise

justwise:


I have seen first hand what toxic marriage break up can do to a man.

A very close friend went through it and it almost destroyed him if not for intervention of city council and his work HR department who supported him and gave him time to return to work.

12yrs marriage with 3kids ended and he can't put his finger to what he did exactly.

He was kicked out and was sleeping in his car while the wife got council accommodation and child benefit from his work.

uhm, a lot going on in my mind. I know I am not the first person and would not be the last on this issues.

I really appreciate every one for dia contributions. Both the positive and the negatives comments are reshaping and making my spirit high.

I hope to have a good news in both ways sooner.

God bless Seun, the moderators and all the contributors because who knows if my brain would have reset to default.

this thread keeps is keeping mycompany for the time being

justwise:


I have seen first hand what toxic marriage break up can do to a man.

A very close friend went through it and it almost destroyed him if not for intervention of city council and his work HR department who supported him and gave him time to return to work.

12yrs marriage with 3kids ended and he can't put his finger to what he did exactly.

He was kicked out and was sleeping in his car while the wife got council accommodation and child benefit from his work.

uhm, a lot going on in my mind. I know I am not the first person and would not be the last on this issues.

I really appreciate every one for dia contributions. Both the positive and the negatives comments are reshaping and making my spirit high.

I to have a good news in both ways sooner.

God bless Seun, the moderators and all the contributors because who knows if my brain would have reset to default.

this thread keeps is keeping mycompany for the time being

justwise:


In addition to that @lightest if you are considering student visa route all you need to worry about is the tuition fees, you don't need to show maintenance money as you will be applying within the UK

Okay, I will look into that too. Thank u

fatima04:


Awwww, sounds like you are making improvement. Why not suggest Therapy so you can both have a professional help you work out your issues. And if she still can't overcome it then by all means it's fine.

Meanwhile what kind of job do you do? If its healthcare related go check the sponsorship list and start actively searching for an opportunity to sponsor your Skilled work visa. That way you can still be in the country to see your kids.

Wishing you the best as you navigate this period

Thank u, it's like u read my mind. I do care for now and I will start looking for sponsorship if ADR does not work out.

A

justwise:


You are a good man, you haven't come here to bash your wife so as to gain sympathy despite all false accusations flying around here.

Keep working on peaceful and RESPECTFULLY resolution of this issue.

Keep your own side of your marriage vows to love her even as at this difficult time.

Give her time to decide as you keep constant contact with your kids

You will definitely find peace even in separation because you have played your part.

You have my respect.

U make me cry bro.

justwise:


You can see how some people are trying so so hard to come up with made-up excuses to justify why the wife kicked him out?

They say maybe....

He is overweight and not attractive to the wife again, he is not developing himself..

She worked sooooo hard to bring her husband here.

She is doing 12hrs shift and should not be expected to come home to cook for the husband and kids

He is financially irresponsible

One asked men to explain why a nice and loving woman will suddenly changed...

Remember they are all waiting to hear the wife's side of the story ? SMH

I have being trying to engage her in talks, and I think most of her grievances have being the issues we have dealt with over and over in Nigeria.that I felt it has being erased in her mind was never erased. Not adultery issues o b4 bash me.

I believe communication gap has being created for a long time which I believe most part was my fault I wil say but nevertheless, there is no way u can read minds even when u tried to ask what is wrong all the times

She is a kind of woman that wil rather bottled up issues rather than say it out.

In what she has being saying so far, she said I should give her time to think.


Though I am proposing we walk more on our communication but she believes am doing that because of my visa.

I will soon conclude what to do if ADR does not work.

The worst that could happen is going back to Nigeria but the fate of our children is my fare right now.

Please note, she is a good woman that would rather bottled issue up than say it out untill it explodes

I believe a thread on living in marriage should be open so that we can all learn from the good, the bad and the ugly of marriage in UK.

What I have realised so far is that I still love my wife and my family as a whole.

Thanks to all advices

Owlette:
I would definitely do what your wife did if I had a financially irresponsible spouse that would come and mess things up for me by not meeting up with bill payments or messing up my credit score if we were to have a joint account. Some people are very bad with money management.
Disclaimer: I am not saying you’re financially irresponsible.

Well u don't know me and if u must be told I work 66hrs with 6hrs unpaid break in a week and I pay what she ask me to pay as bill and apart from that I spent extra £s every month.

Anyway, thanks for the advise and the polite insult.

It's well appreciated

Ticha:


Hopefully things get resolved for you soon. Few things you can do in the meantime -

1. You don't need your wife to add your name to the tenancy agreement. All you need to do is contact the estate agent or landlord and say you want to be on it. They'd be absolutely stupid not to put you on for one main reason -joint and severally liable for rents and arrears. Plus if you choose not to leave, it'd be incredibly difficult to remove you as a squatter.

2. See the children daily - especially in the evenings to participate in bath and bedtime. Wherever you are, have them come stay with you. Establish your presence in their lives as a present father in all ramifications. Split pick ups and drops offs and keep contributing to their upkeep. It will solidify your position should it ever come to custody issues.

3. You have said several times you have no friends. PLEASE AND PLEASE, I beg you in the name of everything, go make some friends. Not only can they be mediators but when shit well and truly hits the fan, they are the guardians of your trustworthiness and honour. Imagine you apply for joint custody and wife says no cos, bla, bla, ba and brings out people to say that or this is so and you'll do what?! Say I'll speak for myself? Norwich doesn't have a lot of Africans yes but the few I met there were straight up awesome humans (we lived in Attleborough for 2.5 years) You need friends. They keep you sane, they could sometimes check your excesses but good ones will always be in your corner especially in a country that can be as lonely as the UK.

4. Keep all communications civil and keep a trail. Texts, emails, etc. If she does not allow you see the kids, please see a mediator and get an order drawn up - https://www.familymediationcouncil.org.uk/find-local-mediator/ to find a local mediator and it costs 215. Unfortunately you will have to pay it as per no recourse to public funds but when it comes to the children, DO NOT SIT AND WAIT.

Last of all, I hope this is a storm that passes quickly for you.

Thank u so much

RalphJean:
I am listening to LBC Radio hosts discussing Cressida Dick's interview with Nick Ferrari yesterday.
Over 99.99% of callers had very strong views on the place of the intact family in preventing knife crime of black boys from stabbing other black boys.

Research (not my research) has shown that a very large proportion of knife crime gangs (both perpetrators & victims) are products of broken families/single parenthood.

Biko, before you use those your 'MAN' muscles to tear up your family (over trivial issues), think well about the future of the children.
Before you allow some stranger on Nairaland to convince you that it is cheap to pay child support in the UK, think well well.

Lastly, to any new persons planning to embark on this UK waka, biko, Ctrl+Shift+Delete that Naija mentality of misogynistic tendencies from your brain.

It is diabolical (in 21st century UK) to expect your wife who works up to 12-hour back-breaking shifts per day to come home and cook for you, and bath the children, plus boil bathing water and carry the bucket for you to the bathroom. After all that, you still want to be the one to lie on top when you want to do the do. And if she complains that she is tired, you conclude that its because she has learned bad habit in obodo oyinbo.

I don talk my own.

Men, only if u guys know what I do to make my wife happy ehn. But its not my case to say as it will look like I am praising myself.

But my question is what would make a woman bring a man to UK and refuse to put her name on the bills, house rent, electricity, water and Co only for her to say I should be paying into her acct even when I pointed it out to her that in case of visa renewed in the nearest future?.

what will make a woman open an account for her children without her husband knowing when she knows I can contribute to it without any argument?

So many hiding thing going on that when talked about resulted into argument.

Anyway, I really appreciate the love on this forum as I have learnt a lot from everybody including the person that wants to hear from my wife side of the story.

if I say, I have being stylishly enslave I won't be wrong with some things I have seen. But I have open up a conversation channel and hope to resolve this as quickly as possible and I will be coming back with resolution and proposal of having a better home in the nearest future.

Once again, God bless u all for ur wonderful contributions.

RalphJean:



those kinds of men will prostrate to their wives in the middle of the night, to make the marriage work.
they will come to nairaland and and be telling other men to leave their house.all this while they have not even heard the other side of the story.
Swallow your Baale pride. Beg your wife, if you have to. Tell your mother (or her mother) to beg her too if necessary. Make your marriage work.... even if you manage to get your own visa independent of hers, you MUST contribute to the upkeep of those 2 children you have. And e no go be beans.

Point of correction, I am no a Baale of Norwich and I don't even have friend I only try survive where ever I found myself. Advice appreciated with thanks

Mrtruetalk:
@lightest listen up if you have ears.

Most people typing up and down here know how they manage their homes, some men even know how they prostrate to their wives in the middle of the night when no one is there to make things work. So far there isn't any case of domestic violence here, you have to go back home and sort issues out with your wife for the sake of your kids. You are over 40 years old and i believe you should be wiser to know that you don't fully depend on the advise you seek from social media platforms. Refuse to be a victim of the system. You and your wife have come into a system and you need to be strong to pull through the system. Yourself and 3 members of your family must have sacrificed at least £10K to come on this Tier 2 with renewal fees coming up soon and i believe this should be your focus at the moment not you leaving home. The tier 2 system is not an easy one. You both literally work for the system for the said 5 years with huge financial sacrifice. Your MRS is probably tired from work as a nurse and needs your support but unfortunately maybe you are adding your drama as the Baale of Norwich as per your previous post. You probably are not looking to develop yourself either. Additionally, you might no longer appear attractive to your wife, you need to look to improve in all ways and set the example. Many things might be involved for her to lose interest in you. Talk things with her and you would find an answer. Legal fees don't come cheap. I would advise you don't even think of that route.

Thank u, well appreciated

fatima04:
@lightest so sorry you are going through this. Going through your previous posts shows the family just relocated in 2020 to join your wife here and sad to know within such a period things has disintegrated to that level.

One thing I would like to add is involving her family as well or someone she listens to to resolve the issues between you guys(caveat as long as its not DV), if she has a good relationship with your family, let them know as well.

Asides from the visa issues, please consider your 2 kids who will be affected in this situation. Remember they are in a new/strange land and now loosing their familiarity with their known household unit, and their mental health is also important.

Please set aside pride and try and resolve. If possible engage therapist as well to help sort out your issues for you to know what is truly wrong in your union.

All the best.

Thank u so much for the love.

the dialogue is going on and I hope it will come to good point.

U guys are really making me to man up.

thanks so much