₦airaland Forum

@viee, i see where u are coming from!!

ur welcome @gbobalaid, i hope it goes well for u, If u are as nice as u sound, and ur wife is like that too, then u both deserve the best, so don't give up just yet, IN LOVE THERE IS ALWAYS HOPE

@jayi, nobody is trying to embarass them, some of them manage that quite well on their own, they don't need help with it!!

hahaaha, personally i am not big on materialistic things, if he has a big house, car etc, it is a bonus, although come to think of it, u men too na wah ohh

I once dated a guy, was with him when he was struggling at teh universit, i'd cook, clean for him, even help him study etc, when he finished (he was in germany), i helped him look for a job here, got him on a work permit here, we had plans for the furture and all, and then guess what, when the company car etc came in, the brother didn't require my services no more, he started messing around with girls that were showering him attention because of his new 'status', today he is married to a friend of mine, lol

so u see!, if i been get wicked mind, i for dey go after 'already made guys now' but i appreciate that sometimes another woman has invested in those guys, work with a guy with what he has when u meet him, if he can still appreciate u in the good times, as he did in the bad times, then u got urself a winner other, carry ur broken heart, waka to one small corner and try to men am!!

@viee, it depends, i am not one of those people that advocate leaving someone in the first isnstance because they cheat (unless they are a compulsive cheat)

If your guy cheats on u, and u turly believe its a one off, and he loves u and respects u in anyother way (just as long as he didnt cheat 'close-to-home') i would say give him one last chance, if he does it again, he knows the door!!, However if u don't think his apology is genuine and/or he will do it, then leave his first time round

If it is your hubby, stay for as long as u humanly can (without becoming a door-mat) and try and work things out

personally, I CAN TOLERATE A GUY WHO CHEATED 'AWAY-FROM-HOME', BUT A GUY WHO CHEATS ON ME, WITH MY FRIEND, SISTERS, MEMBERS OF MY FAMILY, NO WAY (not even a second chance-but thats my prejudice)

@cute, i suppose that is one side of some women i wont understand!!

How can u possibly judge a guy's intentions by how much he nags u, wahala dey oh!!, i guess im kinda different!

Coming to teh hard-to-get thing, i have a male friend that, if u play hard to get, he will play along oh, but when he gets tired of it, he will just keep playing along, d day u gree for am, he will make u 'pay' for it. He thinks by d time he has he wont want u anymore, he only wants to 'puinish' u abit for making him suffer, tehn he gon' dump ur a*se.

@iice, hahaha its true ohh, i don't like girly-guys, especially guys that look 'pretty' doesnt do it for me, like u see a guy and u think he looks exactly like his mum except he is male , that kind prettiness i no like.

rugged soothes me fine, but not 'rough' i dont do rough/ghetto, Heck No!!

OH I LOVE ME A BIT OF STUBBLE, intimacy.Y , u know! just the right length, not bin-laden sha (den dat wud be a beard i suppose )

@iice, i am a bit picky over hair sha, make somebody no come giff me lice hia, see me, infact if i have my way it will conservative and nice and short. cean, i like my men, manly,

no be d one when, i say i am going to d hairdressers, him too go dey follow me compare styles, wahala

However, if i loved a guy who decided to plait, sha, wettin i go?, i go try to support am, if he cant keep it clean, then either he goes or i go

@iice, hahahaha
callouses dey pain my body ohh,

I FORGOT TO MENTION, I LOVE A GUY WITH A CLEAN/NEAT HAIRCUT, ohhhh, u see i practically dislike everything about P.Diddy, but i can not fault his hair.
That's the way a guy should keep his hair.

Low, but sleek, on the other hand, if a guy decides to plait, HE HAD BETTER KEEP IT CLEAN. if not, that one na xcuse for dirty!!

@Adetife, actually NO i havent, because i normally dont play games, if i like a guy and i dont want to date u just yet, i will say yes to u starting communication, but NO to dating u.

@iice, ouch, anyway u start out slowly and give them time to back off, and if they don't , then they deserve the blasting u give them

@cute, haha, i'm glad i amuse u oh, because u sef, make me laugh. The means justify the ends, but sometimes u can lose the best girl just by 'nagging' her

@cute
i know hun, WORD!!, u got it

Adetife:
Now u know the reason for the double standards u was so quick to mention.
For a guy to cheat it is no thing (to him), but a girl literally invests in it emotionally and passionately and that can be painful.

@Adetife, double standards exist when both can be judged in same light, yet one side is easily 'forgiven' because of their genetic inheritance.

And yes, whilst i i mentioned that Most guys cheat physically, it is not a reason for them to use genetics as an excuse, but when girls do it, it is not genetics, they are branded.

Human beings are human beings, and though they might cheat for different reasons, if a girl is going to be called slut and made to feel ashamed for cheating, then a guy too should be made to feel same way, and not 'excused' by society because he is a man, and genetically he is 'programmed' to cheat

@iice, scrump, kini?

wettin u wan chop for dem body?

No reason to be mean/insult/abuse her

Tell her u don't want her, and tell her why, finito. but then ask yourself this:

WHAT IF SHE LOVES YOU ENOUGH AND IS WILLING TO CHANGE/ADJUST THOSE FOR YOU? WILL YOU STAY? or is ur mind made up?

lol @Adetife

No sometimes, if a girl is playing hard to get 'she go dey tok YES and NO at the same time'. I don't do possessive and/or persistent boyfriends.
I want a man not a child, If i tell u something one, twice, thrice, i no go tok again ohh, d day when ur wahala pass my pawa, i go carry my load waka, leave anoda babe to deal wit u

To me, when a guy handles a NO, without persistence, it shows a backbone oh!, because the way mesef dey tok d NO sometimes, i come dey sorry for some of d guys

HAHAHAHAHA my belle dey pain me ohhh, kai see as i dey laff for office like crase woman,

'usherstype' structure, ewuoh!

as for me, make i see

Taller than me (but given that i am small, he'd have to be a pgmi to not be taller)
Broad shoulders ( i love a guy who fits well into a suits), i dont want no slouchers
Good chest, not bony, but not exactly swhazenegar, because na dey i dey sleep oh!
good/strong arms, I wanna FEEL it when you hold me
SOFT HANDS, sorry guys, but IN MY BOOKS, YOU HAVE TO MOISTURISE YOUR HANDS AND LOOK AFTER THEM. i want to feel ur hands on me, not sandpaper
Complexion, i have no preferences, just as long as u aint ugly, ur complexion must fit u
thighs, moderate, not too strong or flabby, i like wrapping my legs in his thighs, or using it like my pillow when watching tv
i dont do CHUBBY guys

bdaf:
5. patience. ( nothing is sexier than a patient man)

you see, i beg to differ, Nothing to me is sexier than a CONFIDENT man!!, ohhh BOY (not arrogant, confiendent, in his strangths and weaknesses and isn't afraid to show me either)

I am sick and tired of naija guys, that can't seem to understand the meaning of NO.
NO I don't want your number
NO i don't want to give u my number
NO i don't want to even know you
NO i don't want to date you,
NO, i aint playing hard to get, i really don't think your hot, and i really don't want to date u

Tell me guys, why do some of you not want to take NO for an answer?, Na water dey una head, abi na brain?

Ladies, do you meet these kind of guys too?

bebe2007:
Am taking another dimension here. If your babe cheats on you there is obviously a reason. Stay and find out what you are doing wrong and learn to correct your mistake. she probably would not do it again if you correct your mistake.

If your boyfriend cheats on you he obviously has no reason to do so.LOL just being a dog that he is anyway.

Seriously, i would want to know why he did it probably am doing something wrong.Sometimes its true, you are probably in the wrong. BUT MOSTLY ITS NOT YOUR FAULT.

Thus said, for most guys, cheating is physical.

But for most girls that cheat, it's an emotional thing.

Your babe will hardly screw another guy because she got aroused and couldn't control it. If she does, then your dating a prostitute (only she don't do it for the money). For girls, its deeper than physical.

hahahahahahaha y r some of u like this, lol, sha una dey make me laff

I am in the same pot soup

I have been dating my guy for over a year and a half and he aint never bought me a single gift!!, i buy for him oh!, when i asked him, he said he isnt a gift person, he doesnt expect them, but if that is how i choose to express my feelings, then thats fine, but i have no obligation to buy him gifts, he will express his feelings how he chooses, he said he would try to buy 4me too, its been 2months now, and i never see even one, and if i know him like i do, i will just accept it like one of those things, and after we have addressed the issue a few times, i know he will give in and SPOIL me if i let him see that him buying me gifts really mean THAT much to me, lol (when i start throwing tantrums and frontin', he'll do it to please me)

My point is hun, some ppl are not the gift type, u might make him start doing it to please to, but is this the reason why u wanted the gifts in the first place?, just to keep you quiet?, NO. What you need to do, is see if he expresses his affections in other ways.

My guy, pays for dinners, outings etc, unless i insist on paying. If he feels i need or want something, he will give me the money for it, if i ask, (but because i dont ask often, that one is a rarity). I have come to accept him as he is. DOES IT MEAN HE IS STINGY?, NO, some ppl were vrought up differently.

A RELATIONSHIP THAT LASTS IS BASED ON A BALANCE, YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND YOUR PARTNER AND COMPROMISE SOME OF WHAT YOU LIKE, TO MAKE HIM AT EASE/COMFORTABLE (as he too will do), so what if ur friends' guys buy them gifts?, how r u sure that that means the guy even loves them?, most guys use material things to mask the fact that they dont love a girl, and some of us girls think LOVE=MATERIAL THINGS, we make it easy for playas, because one gift shuts us up!!

If it is a guy's nature to shower you with gifts and he doesn't do it, just as long as he aint doing to to some other girl, huney hang in there, its ur 'badluck' that u chose that kinda guy, if u aint happy with it and think he is 'unromantic', u know where the door is.

Confident
generous (you dont have to rich, and i dont ask from men, but IF and WHEN i am need i need to know u'll be there)
Good dress sense
smells good
nice smile
Down to earth / playfull
He should have his ego under control i beg, if not i go break am !!

@topic

U want a woman who

1. Not afraid of house work
2. Can cook
3. Can host your friends / family beautifully and respectfully
4. Has her own goals in life, and is not just content with being your wife
5. Respect you for WJO you are and WHAT you have (whether it is small or big, na her choice)
6. Loyal
7. Support you at all times, even when the world is against you
8. Can stand up to you and tell u ur wrong when you are about to make a mistake
9. Is sexually compatible with you
10. Wants teh best for you both, and isn't afraid to go out there and work and show the world she's urs

I see guys taking their time to describe what/how they like their women,

so oyah, ladies, make una holla, HOW YOU LIKE UR MEN, 'chubby'(bulky), thick,

holla, and dont 4get to mention, what u like best about a man's physique also

the non-physical things that really get u going in a guy!!!!


(all those guys when want sabi how to toss babes, make una come learn wettin babes dey like oh!!, Lux don help una free of charge)

THANK YOU NAIRALANDERS, u never fail to put a smile on my face, even when i am in the middle of a horrible day, i love ya'll

Now back to the topic, maybe she is frontin', is there something she wants that you have not been giving her?, ATTENTION, LOVING, TLC, etc, maybe this is her way to get ur attention, and boy oh boy has she got it!

or MAYBE she might actually be genuinely BUSY

I SOMETIMES DISLIKE THE WAY GUYS THINK THEY CAN HAVE A LIFE, BUT THE GIRL'S LIFE SHOULD REVOLVE AROUND THEM, LIKE ITS OK FOR U TO BRUSH HER OFF THE PHONE, BUT ITS NOT OK FOR HER TO DO IT, maybe she's just giving u a taste of ur own medicine

and believe me hun, if ur babe has half-a-brain cell, she no go answer ur call sef, if she were cheating on u. Infact, she go switch ooff the phone, hell i do it, (not when im cheating-cos i dont cheat), but if i am somewhere i know my guy wont be happy me being there or i dont want to be disturbed, d phone goes on silent/off, afterall my answerphone, says SORRY I AM UNAVAILABLE, IF ITS URGENT, LEAVE A MSG I WILL CALL U BACK

@iice, arrghhhh dat just makes the guy come acorss a little arrogant.

One guy actually said to me once '' Hey hun, u look like the kind of girl i could buy a drink for''

i said '' really, is that so?, and what kind of girl would that be'' (bare in mind i was alreadysmiling)

he said ''beautiful, charming and sexy'', i said ''well since u put it so nicely, i guess i better grace u with my presence for one drink''

at teh end he wanted my number, ' just said ''sorry u asked for a drink not my number, if/when u see me next time, get straight to the point, u never know''

Alert:
Wait till she calls u first, then u can kno if she's cheap or desperate. some girls may give u their number just to shorten the time you would spend wit them in asking them questions or trying to argue wit u on why they won't let u have their phone no because they aren't interested, so when u call her she might tell u on phone.she didn't give u her house address,did she? is just a phone no.!

WORD!!,

@cute, hahahahahahha, e be like say u sef don dey notice am dey pile 4 belle

mainly because, ur usually on ur 'best' behaviour when u start dating someone,, but then with time, u relacx more and the real u startes coming out, when u made an effort to go out, u'd much rather a night in, etc

its just nature takes its course and the real u emerges

@cute, u see, i  knew theres something about u i like, i like that matter-of-factly approach to things,

he aint saying dont have anotehr person, but just to not disrespect him, by cheating on him, lol , and when i told him that was teh sweetest thing ever, lol, he rolled back into his 'macho shell' i just smiled and shook my head thinking BABY!!, MY BABY!!, i'll try my best to look after u and ur heart!!!

chudy:
yo everyone, i use to think i was asmooth talker, a player, one who can sweep the ladies off their feet with little effort. i use to thin k of myself as this. but then it happens that i've a girl, a different one, a heart beat stopper, i mean she's an angel sent from out of space. easch time i want to say smthing to her i keep swallowing spits and its as if my tongue is tied down. i just can't find the right words.

please, i need good and spirited suggestions as to how i could talk to her, please ladies in the house i need your comments on this

BABY UR HOOKED!!!, ITS DA LUVVV BUG, hahahahahaha, seriously if you cant talk to her, just look at her, sooner or later she will ask u 'what', just tell her ' everytime i'm around i go speechless', if u say it honestly and she be better babe, she will try to make u feel more at ease and do most of the intiating of the conversation until u find ur voice, if she sef be mumu, then good luck, y'all gonna be playing deaf and dumb for a long time!!,

Funny thing is, when a gy truly loves u, if u cheat on him, u will break his heart, possibly scar him for life, sensitive creatures they are, men

COME OH @vIEE, I BEG I NO UNDERSTAND U, SO HE CAN CHEAT AND ITS OK WITH U AS LONG AS ITS JUST A PHYSICAL THING AND THERE ARE NO EMOTIONAL STRINGS?, truth is u cant keep him home all the time, because if he wants he can still bang someone else in his lunch hour

@cute, i know hun

When me and my guy first started dating the first thing he made me promise was, ''the day u fall out of love with me, leave me, Dont cheat on me'', promise u will do that, and i will return the honour,