₦airaland Forum

@efuah
thank you hun, i mean when i asked him about it, naturally he denied cheating, but admitted to the others.
I will concentrate on my exams, and if he doesnt come well, i guess like u said its his loss

@opuro
who is decieving who now?, i beg u no go carry ur wahala waka, if u no get better tin to tell me. if i been sabi say na deception, i for enter in d first place?, see no make me transfer aggression, i no send 4 wahala at all now so!!

ur welcome, @nurex

@priscare, thank u
actually i know to concentrate on my exams just now. and i am actually willing to put up with some of his crap, but only if he too makes some sort of compromise.
i havent called him since sunday and he too hasnt called. should i call him?, or wait 4 him to make the 1st move, given that i've often made the first move in the past.
i mean, if i am willing to put up with some crap, then surely atleast i should get my due respect, right?, or should i call?

@mubowa, u got me cracking up!! u dont 'dramatize' in public, kai nairaland go tich me words oh!!

@nurex, trhnk u, eyahh sorry oh, no worry sha, me when open forum here, say i need una help/opinion, nobody no offer me help, hahaha, i just laugh say i go full through somehow, u'll be alright hun, just go with what ur heart decides and if ur heart aint deciding nothin' then stay away from all of them (cos u aint a playa), otherwise if they find out,, they might feel played and hurt -even though that was not ur intention

INFACT @NUREX i shall be far from offended

ohh, now ur entering new territory oh,

abohrandy:
i don't like drama queens because i am not a drama king.
first of all, i am the kind of guy who like s his liberty in every relationship. not because i am your guy, u gonn chain me to one spot and when you c me wit another sista WWIII starts.

just trust your man and learn to forgive and forget.

which one should she be FORGIVING?

@nurex
hmmm only 'smooth talkers' dey call babes BABY so freely ohh!, because their are used to it now, wen dem go dey toss 3 girls at once, no de want mistake dia names, na so dem go dey call all of them and everyone else 'baby'

sha, maybe me and u view it differently, but remember im a babe, ur a guy, im at d recieving end, so i know d kind of ppl that usually call me baby, when they dont even know ME, sha maybe ur an exception ([size=8pt]yeah right! )

@bebe
im only saying it as i see it, abi u no feel me?

hahahah i have never fought with any body in my life (well apart from wrestling with my little sister-when we were kids) and i am not about to start, and certainly not for a guy.

If a guy cheats or is cheating and i know the babe, i will tell her that she's messing with my man, and walk away, afetr all he is the one that has the power to choose over us,

infact i will deal with the guy, and given that i dont use physical strength on ppl, my tongue IS very hurtful when i am hurt, not provocative or insultive, just hurtful, but then again i suppose truth hurts!, so d guy will benefit from my words not teh girl.

i wont fight with her, VERBAL MATCH OR PHYSICAL MATCH, she aint worth it, shes just another gurl trying to climb up in the world via another babe's man, and sometimes these girls dont even know he got a gf

@bebe, hahah yes, i've met babes like oh!!, infact there is dis one girl in my class who give me dirty looks, because she likes one guy when don dey eye me, hahaha, i just dey laugh her, see me ohh

Omo, d way u dey yarn sef e come be like playboy, kai, im almost inclined to not feel for u ohh, see as u don dey call BEBE, baby, and b4 u say it, i know her name means 'baby' but d way u 'smooth talk am' again, hmmmm

jeez, ruudie, ur a bit pessimistic arent u?!!

E*V*E*R*Y*T*H*I*N*G, about me is fan-bloody-tastic

can't help myself, i was born that way!!

HAHAHHA i am sensing a competition here, haha

WHO IS THE GREATEST NO-STRINGS SEX GENDER?, MALE/FEMLAE!!!

i'm not for open relationships sha, but if he insists on cheating, i'd leave him, thus giving him the freedom he needs to sleep around

@poster, distance has its issues oh, but i suppose u gotta deccide whether or not u r READY to love again
and whether u are ready for the whole Distance relationship thing and its troubles, if u no get mind, i go tell u to leave am, bco dat one is for the strong hearted.

errmmm, i am thinking WHAT HAVE YOU DON?, OR WHAT HAVE YOU BEEN DOING?

i have been telling my bf the same thing, and if she is like me, then it's just a few small things u do that really wind her up, but then u refuse to acknowledge them,, and i bet u the day i will dump my guy for real, he too will be surprised thinking he hasnt done anything wrong, the big things dont bother me, its the little ones, SO MAYBE U SHOULD HAVE BEEN MORE SENSITIVE TOWARDS HER NEEDS

its either that, OR SHE HAS FOUND SOMEONE ELSE WHO SHE THINKS IS BETTER/TREATS HER BETTER THAN U DID. and she just wants out of her relationhsip.what can i say?, talk to her?, u might be able to convince her to coming back, but know u have to straighten things out or she'll go again. If not, then move on dude!

hahaha, @nurexg, god don butter ur bread finish, u sound like a kid in a candy shop.

ol' boy, there is defintely one of them that u 'enjoy' more than the others. or one u feel most comfortable with. So take some time away from all 3, and do some soul-searching, u'll find ur answer has been there all along, and u've just been complicating it, maybe because the one u prefer is least pretty?

I have an a bit of an issue and i need your views on it.

My boyfriend got transferred to scotland in december.

My cousin told me this weekend that her boyfriend (who is close friends with mine) told her about 21months ago that i should leave him.

She (my cousin) reckons he has a double life and is cheating on me. Infact that there are times when he has come to london behind my back. And she knows this, by picking up on conversations her guy and mine have.

According to her she's heard him say he can't deal with the LDR thing, and he would have had other girlfriends if not because he knows she has a large mouth and would tell me.

Now, knowing me, i called him and asked him, and typically he denied everything. I know for a fact that he came down 2 weeks ago and i didn't know about it. but i found out from his sister. (he doesnt know that i know this).

I know he is a flirt, and i am too. However, i've always thought he knew where to drew the line. I have given him that trust, after all we've been together for over a year and a half.

I have busy life, and so has he. I do not pry too much into his life and neither does he pry into mine.We plan on moving in together in about 7months. Either i go up, or he comes back down to london. My cousin thinks i should leave things for now until we move in together, tehn i can know for sure if he is cheating on me, because then i can have 'evidence'.

When i asked him about the things she said he gave me answers. Then i text him yesterday telling him i know for a fact that 2 weeks ago he came down without telling me, and i don't know why. He said we would talk about it, and he still hasn't called. I haven't called him either since sunday, and a huge part of me does not intend to.

My best friend thinks i should give him another chance, seeing as i completely trusted him before this and wait until he gives me reason to chuck him out. However, my cousin has no reason to lie. Granted he was a womaniser in the past, but i don't think all the while he was in london and we were together that he ever cheated on me. and i know he 'changed'.

I have major exams coming on in 2weeks as i am doing my masters and this is the last sort of confusion i need now.

DO NOT TELL ME TO FORGET ABOUT TIT AND CONCENTRATE ON MY EXAMS JUST NOW, because i know that!, and i am trying but it's hard, if u need more info, ask, but WHAT DO U ALL THINK?

@Nymph ur statement DRAMA KINGS, really got me cracking up!

I don't do drama, infact i no even get d pawa sef. but sometimes i feel guys take advantage of d soft natured girls. because its like when they are guaranteed a headache when they do something dat doesnt please their babe, they are more likely to behave to avoid headache.

Also i also find if a guy starts shouting and acting on the defensive when u ask him a question, then more often than not, he knows he's been doing something he shouldn't have in the first place,

I know i am probably gonna get slaughtered for this, as i can see most of you are feeling her!!

but DAMN she needs to slow down.

Granted she is beautiful and talented, but heck she is doing my head in. If i have to watch one more thing on MTV about her, or Listen to a new song, i'll scream, she is LITERALLY EVERYWHERE!!

no sooner does she have one song out, than releases another one, she is competing with herself, infact pretty soon, half of the chart top 20 go be only her songs

Anybody else seen enough of her?, or is it just me?

Im digging Gabrielle Union

But i'd have to admit that KELLY ROWLAND would probably look best, without make up

i get bored, heck its human, how to keep it alive?, errm, 'WORK HARD'

like ma gurl @cute-ass, said, working ghard is the key

and like @iice said, you need a commitment to keeping the relationship alive and to each other, THAT IS WHAT WILL TAKE YOU THROUGH THE TRYING TIMES, and believe me, there are alot of those!! simply because no 2human beings are same, God is a wonderful creator. In as much as Variety is the spice of life, variety causes trbl

i meant JEALOUSY

Are you the jealous type (i mean more than 'normal'), if you, are how do u deal with it?

How do you express it? What sparks your it?

If u got a jealous [partner, what are some of the issues u've faced, and how have u dealt with it?

Is it necessary or not?
I mean the type of girls that nag, moan and turn every small incident into WWIII

i beg if ur one of such girls, then try explain to us why u do it. because as for me, I dont shout at my guy oh, if i say something one, twice, the third time, i go act. He's not a child i dont need to shout and cause drama

The worse combination is a JEALOUS DRAMA QUEEN, christ!! all the guy's gotta do is check out another babe in the mall, and she's all attitude and screams.

Ladies is it necesary? do u think men don't / wont listen to u oherwise?

Guys how do u deal with it?

sha, leave her, there are 2 types of ppl in this world

1. Those who listen and learn from advice
2. Those who need to experience things b4 they learn from them

maybe ur friend falls in the second category. so let her learn

closetpervert:
i cheat also.

Thanks for your honesty, much appreciated

@sam
I know, i get what ur saying and i believe it also

@dollyP, errmmm NO it is a fact, its not an excuse, some guys can have sex with u, and get nothing more than physical relief/satisfaction from it!, sad but true, just WALKING-F*CKING-MACHINES

hahah it depends, if the guy asked me out and i offer to pay the bill and he insists, then i let him. afterall, he should know i can look after myself if need be, i aint not leech, parasitic gold-digga.

Now if i like the guy, and want to see him again soon i'll let him pay, but i will get something out of it blackmail him, saying '

'OK ADE, I WILL LET YOU PAY THIS TIME, AS LONG AS YOU PROMISE THAT WHEN WE HOOK UP FOR DINNER ON SATURDAY, I'LL PAY . Is that a deal? IF NOT, THEN YOU ARE JUST GOING TO HAVE LET ME PAY THIS TIME, OR WE GO 50/50''

I've just offered a him a second date, on my terms, so i am still in control of the situaion. If he's into me, he'll take it. if not, i move on.

PS* the trick has never failed me yet!!

samsilo:
@Dezi, Read through the post again so u understand.
Also note Luxoire is a female.

Thank u choc, i dont think she picked up on that!!

Now now pees, its inetresting to see ur views, THE GENERAL CONSENSUS I AM GETTING HERE IS THAT MOST CHIKS DON'T WANNA KNOW because THEY TRUST THEIR MEN 10I% (errmmm yeah right!, burying ur head in the sand doesn't mean sh*t aint gonna happen), lol, thats just me being cynical

GUYS ON THE OTHER HAND, ABSOLUTELY WANT TO KNOW, SO THEY CAN GET RID OF THE BABE, (very realistic approach to life)

oh and some guys are asking me, how i can say guys can cheat without emotions, errm IF YOU ARE HONEST WITH UR SOUL, U'LL KNOW I AM TELLING THE TRUTH, TENDENCY IS, GUYS SEEM TO BE MORE CAPABLE OF SEPARATING SEX FROM EMOTIONS THAN LADIES, hence they can have sex with u, walk out and not remember ur name in a month, whilst the lady will probably still be able to tell u what perfume he was wearing that night. because they can't control their libido at that point in time, if u argue, check this,

u got ur babe u been dating 2yrs, and ur babe is telling u no sex before marriage (a wedding that will not happen for atleast a year or more, as u havent even proposed to her yet), u had an active sex life before u met her. Now, ur in a club/bar with some friends and suddenly u meet this ggirl (ur type physically) u 2 get chatting and u 2 hit it off. B4 she's getting tired of the noise, and wants to go home. u offer to walk her, leaving ur friends behinf. u get to her door she invites u in. She starts kissing u, and u go rock hard 'down there', she keeps intensifying the passion and the heat of her carresses. Your mind knows u shouldnt be doing this, but everytime u try to pull back she goes in deeper. You havent had some in 2yrs dude and its bursting to come out. So u give in. 2hrs later ur heading home thinking, i dont even have her number,
One night stand?, yes, she really liked u and might want to see u again, but u cant cos really u were just attracted to her, u love another, dis u cheat for love? and who is more likely to get emotionally attached here?

BTW, LUST IS NOT AN EMOTION, ATTRACTION IS NOT AN EMOTION (a feeling maybe, but in this context, i want to think emotions run deeper than feelings), LOVE is an EMOTION, SADNESS, JOY etc,

[quote author=cute-ass link=topic=52772.msg1109794#msg1109794 date=1178913981]Thanks jare . . A great list , if it was any better i would have been wondering if i wrote it myself lol [/quote]hahahah, u really are cheeky aren't you!, sha i think u and i see eye-to-eye on most issues

frankiriri:
No problem as long as you can afford it dream on

I had already said that in my posting!!