₦airaland Forum

[b]@fekuti, [/b]western ke?, there is nothing western about it!!, right from back home, if i see a guy beat a girl and the girl goes back, then she come complain to me, no be small cuss i go cuss her oh!!

and if ur my friend a guy and i learn that u beat ur babe, sha d friendship is OVER

WHY DO YOU THINK IT IS OK TO BEAT YOUR WIFE/BABE?

haha huney, u are 19 and are most probably thinking in terms of physique (mainly) before persoanlity right now. i suppose its better than thinking with your dick and trying to take advantage of the fact that she like u too much.

My advice? here it is:

if you like her (as u suspect u are begining to do) the hang in there and see how compatible you people are just now. you are too young to be thinking of anything too serious as that would only put more strain on the relationship b4 it even starts. relationship at that age should be fun and all about enjoying each other's company and ding things togther. If this is the case then i say give her a chance, but let her know, so that she stops fussing over you (if that is what irritates you) she might just be doing it to make/get u interested. once u let her know ur hers, she will calm down and stop it.

However if u are just seeing her as an opportunity for free sex, then i say let her down gently and walk away like a man. Have a chat with her and spell things out to her. If she continues, tell her you shall cease to be her friend because it is annoying you and embarassing you. If she cares about making u happy she will stop, IF NOT THEN WE GOT A POTENTIAL STALKER IN THE MAKING!!

be careful though BECAUSE YOU DONT WANT TO BE WITH HER, AND THEN SHORTLY AFETR SOMEONE YOU ACTUALLY LIKE COMES ALONG AND YOU HAVE TO BREAK HER HEART. SO WHATEVER YOU DECIDE BE TRUE TO YOURSELF AND HER TOO!!

good luck pumpkin!!

@niceuzor, interesting meaning you dont have an opinion?

or you have, but are just not going to offer it?, i am interested in knowing what YOU (as a guy mainly and then as a person) thinks

some guys think UNWANTED PREGNANCY na d babe's wahala, make she deal with am, they either skive, or just watch her suffer and come to a decision, all the time not offering any support or consolation!! MADNESS!!

I know there are some guys out there that think it is right to beat for babe/wife all in the name of 'CORRECTION'.

you (d guy) who dey correct u?, when u go dey take am upon yourself to discipline a fellow adult?, na u born her?, she be ur pikin?

infact, IF YOU ARE A GUY THAT BEATS BABE, then know YOU ARE A SORRY EXCUSE FOR A MAN!!, no be for woman body u go show ur own power, go and pick on someone ur own size and we'll see who gets beaten then.

Look if you can't control your temper, then walk away when u feel your self getting angry, and come back when ur more controlled (although i thik some babes sef too are very provocative) that is not an excuse for you to beat A WOMAN!!

SHA, WOMEN IF A GUY BEATS U AND U GO BACK, then know ur letting him it is OK, but WAR BETIDE THAT MAN, THAT WILL EVER ATTEMPT, LET ALONE MAKE THE MISTAKE TO STRIKE ME (esp if ur ex made u understand it was ok, and ieverytime was her fault, by justifying ur actions), i pray make God comot u from my path this minute, because if we should meet, this earth go small for both of us. (anyhow, as i don pray, i trust HE will not allow this kind of frustrated man to befall me)

LADIES & GENTS (i know some of u probably grew up in househols where this one was a frequent occurence and ur mom had no say / right so u think it is ok) but it is not ohh, so show ur support in light of this, so as to let the guys know this is not acceptable. discourage this practice.

HUSBAND BEATING (sounds funny) HOWEVER RARE, IS ALSO WRONG!!, so make all d strong babes out there beware!!

@twinsy!!!

Don't mind me and my topics jarre!! , every so often i actually have a brainwave!

i am feeling your honesty. and it is good of you to not use that to judge someone. Cos i know people who do, and i think it is disgusting and very hurtful of them to try and impose their ideas on others just because they disagree with someone's actions or reasoning

I am truly sorry that your friend regrets what she did. Usually ppl regret it because people feel pushed/cornered at that time and given a different set of circumstances, they'd not do it. But if they had done it for all the right reasons at the time and they felt it was a decision they were in control of 'not circumstances' then they can live with themselves

IBDAT
sha, i like ur honest and balanced view

@miss

I was not hating on you, and i do believe you are within your right to express your opinion. and some people might disagree with you, That is the beauty of the human nature, its diversity!

@Maleeq
I appreciate your honesty, and there a few guys out there that feel the same way you do. Whether or not they admit it is another issue.

@miss
i appreciate your passion and viewpoint. But there are people that have been in your situation and unfortunately for them they have had no one there to help and support the through, the partners don't want to know and having the baby would be detrimental to the baby.

then again, i think one's viewpoint would depend on when they thought human life began?
At sterilisation, implantation, or embryo/fetus?

your answer to this might very well determine how u view abortion

@nice uzor, NO i do not believe we have met before, are we supposed to have?

@poster

how about you think of it this way

THEIR LYING MIGHT BE A REACTION TO THE ACTION OF THE GUYS, some guys only look out for themselves annd what they want, what the girl wants if irrelevant. So the babes start thinking they gotta watch their own back and then it is SURVIVAL OF THE FITTEST. you lie to get on top of your game.

Is it right?, NO, i don't condone it. But instead of trying to blame, how about u change your approach to ladies, and see if theirs changes. If she really likes u and notices u are honest and sincere, chances are shee too will be honest and sincere to you. But if she see u as a hussler, she go try get max from u, b4 u waka

You are in a relationship and you get pregnant. It is unwanted and you are not ready for it, you know you can't possibly afford a baby.
LADIES
1. Do you keep it? - out of morality / religion?

2. Do you abort it?, you believe Abortion actually empowers women, and you choose to not have a baby till you are ready. (unfortunately, contraception aint 100% pregnancy proof, so i wont want smart-ass responses telling me u should have used a condom)

3. If you heard a girlfriend of urs had an abortion, woul u look at her differently?, or would u still treat her same?

GENTS
1. Would you allow your babe to commit abortion?, or would you leave it up to her?

2. Would it affect your relationship in any way or at any stage?

3. Also, if you met a girl u liked and started dating her, and then she told you she'd had an abortion in the past. Would it taint your view of her?, or make u think 'less' of her as a person?

_{PS i ain't expecting a full scale confession from anyone. So you don't have to have gone through it yourself. Just opinions.}

@potser

1. if you are prone to outbreaks, visit a dermatologist.

2. if you have already done so. then the cure is simple EXFOLIATE & CLEANSE YOUR SKIN 2TIMES A DAY (3 times if ur skin gets oily).

3. and then always keep your hair clean. dirty hair blocks the pores.

4. Avoid oily foods, e.g peanuts etc

5. DO NOT pick your spots. If you have a spot, let it dry out, then u remove it, do not pick it

6. Avoid touching your face. because ur hand carries lots of bacteria, and sometimes when u touch an area with spots, u 'infect' the clear areas.

It might not remove them 100% completely, but it will reduce them significantly. Good luck

Uk sizes are one size smaller than the Americans (cos americans are bigger)

But then most UK sizes are one size bigger than EU (cos europeans are 'smaller'

That in mind EU sizes are 2size smaller than US sizes, lol

@poster, ne4real
ur a size 12?, huney ur ok>?, hell y do u wanna starve urself smaller?, look at long as u are proportionate then that's cool I'm 75KG too, and i wear 12/14 UK. Im kool with it. I dont want to lose i just want to maintain.

If you do feel uncomfortable, then eat less, and exercise more, half your portions (calorie intake) and double ur gym time. But then do exercises like aerobics/treadmill. That way u'll burn more than u take in. that's the simple formula of it. all the other bla bla bla just won't work!!

@IBDAT
hahaha, and keep holding your tongue hun, because i know how u feel about this issue

@ijogbon
no mind people, hahahahaha, say love don dey wia contacts, kai, na for here i go hear all kain wahala

@banton
hahaha YES i have been in love, and when i was jilted, that sh*t hurt, in fact i felt like life's a bitch and mine just had puppies.
But then i also learnt, i no go kill myself 4 love oh, especially if the other person aint appreciating it.,.i'll take the choice to mend a broken heart(and get over it sooner) over staying in a relationship where i am still nursing the broken heart with no hope of getting over it anytime soon, because everything/everyday re-opens the wound and makes it hurt deeper (because things start seming like despite ur efforts nothing u do is good enough), infact don't go asking/telling me whether i have been in love, because u don't know the half of it!!

_{(i think i better stop, i can feel a ranting/venting session coming on!!)}

because 'bad boys' are da bomb if u want a fun/exciting relationhship, they will take u places , but they are usually not at a point in their lives when they crave something serious in a relationship. so the minute u the girl want to start getting too serious/ restricting them, they move on no pain, and then u will be there crying!, so make u control ur heart

@iice, ouch!!, ahaha he still jealous as a friend?, na wah ohh, though some guys get really jealous only when they really dif a babe, so maybe thats a sign he's really down 4u

@nelseel
hahaha, get EVEN huh?, woaw, i'd kinda hate to mess with u

@poster

I'VE LEARNT THAT I AM NOT 'UN-DUMPABLE', (made me humble and controlled my big but fine ego) the first and only guy that dumped me, turned and told me, ''sorry hun even Halle Berry gets cheated on''

cute-ass, ijog, et al

una no go kill wif lafter 4 hia oh!!, hahaha

@poster
U know, u heard what these good ppl of NL have said. if she cheating, and u know she aint gonna stop or stop for e, or she aint willing to invest in you emotionally, then it's best u let her go, for BOTH your sakes, otherwise she will feel restrained by your OVER-love, and u will harbour anger towards her for no reason, y'all had better go ur separate ways, let her share herself with the world, and u mend ur heart and look for someone who will appreciate it WHOLLY

@twin

hahahahahaha, na qn me sef ask oh!!, hahaha sont mind me i was trying to be silly, b4 coming back to write something sensidble, but after sha reading ur post, i agree with what u say, he should try to forgive his mum and trust she wont do it again, otherwise, PAPA'S GAT TO KNOW, but dont give ur father high blood and kill him over something that could have been avoided

shebi i hear say DIAMONDA ARE A GIRL'S BEST FRIEND

ol' boy, u sef been don buy her diamond b4?, lol, maybe she sef don see wia her own go from come now?, lol, worse of all if ur 'poor'

sorry yah!, no mind, soon enuff some one who LOVES YOU FOR YOU will come along!

@the person b4 me

it takes one to know one,

what was ur friend doing in teh right place at the wrong time?

@nuzo
some Black women, need independence, and i am not just talking about when it favours them oh!!, I MEAN THEY NEED INDEPENDENCE OF MIND, POCKET AND SPIRIT. only when they truly achieve that, and believe that they should live according to their pockets and not their boyfriends' will they really appreciate what any man gives them (black / white)

ppl that over ask don't appreciate. because they dont stop to think that maybe they are stretching u too much, or u just might not have it

relationships should be about INTERDEPENDENCE, but until there is independence from both sides, that interdepndence will not exist!

@I-man
hahahah u clown!!, i no get answer 4 u sef, and so wat if i'm been outside, 1 day or 10 yrs?, im african by blood. it IN me, my environment doesn't matter (that much)

@Bola
the only thing i will tell u, is to give the guy space. LEAVE HIM, him sef don tyr for u, habaaaaa, e be like say na babes like una dey make guys maltreat their next gf.
Leave him, give him time to clear his mind, sounds to me like he has put up with more than a lot of other guys will. give him the respect to sort out his mind. If it is now you are realising his worth in ur life, too bad, just pray he comes back. if he is urs, he will miss you and come back to you, Then u will have the chance to right your wrongs. You will know his being with u is by his choice not by ur begging him to. If you stay there, he will transfer all his surpressed anger from b4. Leave d guy my dear. If he is urs he will come back to you for another chance.

A cat will always find its way home

@Ruudie
boo how can u try to trip me up on something i happen to think isn't very polite, as u yarn for pigin/english, me sef go follow u oh

and YES i'd like to know reasons why you would consider dating 'someone like me'

NO, there is no chance that i shall 'return' to naija (so i guess that throws that offer out the window)

and about what u had said that i didnt approve of, i can't even remember, but i know it wasn't what u said (because quite frankly you're entitled to your opinions) it was more the way u said it, came across as a bit rude & unpleasant and i just remember thinking ''i will speak to him only if addresses me'' '' no need for that attitude''

@Bola, i beg dont mislead us with ur heading ohh,

WHY ARE YOU QUESTIONING HIS RELIABILITY?, according to ur story, its ur reliability that should be in question.

@bola
u are d cause of ur troubles oh!, i cant sympathise with you on this one. because u have done it before and he chose to FORGIVE out of love, or whatever. he forgave u and gave u another chance.

Chances are it probably gotto him this more, because in the 6months, he has probably been missing u and wishing u were with him, he ha probably fought temptation, and u just give 'it' away freely

sha me i say, LEAVE D POOR GUY ALONE, AND GET OVER IT. if u loved him in d first instance u wouldnt have cheated let alone more than once!!