NiCurious's Posts
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Now I want to know, what does Chika Ike herself look like, without her makeup? Hmmm.... |
kponkedenge: |
GoodBoi1:https://www.snopes.com/news/2020/11/04/live-updates-snopes-coverage-of-the-aftermath-of-the-2020-u-s-election/ |
Gerrard59: |
MurphyInc:Fake info about UN. Please stop passing it. But don't stop protesting! |
That's creative thinking, using the rat's skills to locate landmines safely. A big, human-created problem, being resolved by a rat. Let the rat always feel that its humans appreciate it, lest it find a hand grenade, pull out the pin, and throw it. |
200 million people, yet not enough manpower. Hmm. |
nextstep:That's an interesting way of putting it. I like what you said. I fear that if God (if there is one) walked into a church/mosque etc. and started explaining what really happened, and how things really work, God would be kicked out of the church or mosque, for making assertions beyond what is written in the holy books. :/ |
Women getting plastic surgery try to look more "womanly" (at least in their minds). A child getting plastic surgery is trying to look like a (toy) child. What will happen to this child look, as her body grows? Maybe her mind will finally catch up with her age? |
What scrap metal yard did they take that tanker from? Look at that smashed windshield caving in...I don't think that happened from colliding with the keke. Missing headlight. Bald tyres. Is that driver side door made of wood, with no glass in it? Rust and dents everywhere...if that is the outside, what is the engine like, and how has it been maintained? And what is the inside of the water tank like, and how pure is that water? I would not drink it. Madness to take such a thing on the public road, yet it is seldom the driver who suffers. |
anonimi:How long do you feel he might have lived, if not under house arrest? |
Openbusiness:Galileo was not killed. He died at home, after nine years of house arrest. |
DICO111:If I dream about picking snails, it will have a different meaning than if you dream about picking snails. 1. What does picking snails mean to you? 2. What were you feeling disturbed about? Answer those two questions, and you will decode your dream. |
Nooil:I am better read on the topic of European witchcraft than you seem to think I am, which is why I am contesting your point on the burning of "witches". No need to reply, but please do a little reading of your own. Start with learning about who Matthew Hopkins was, and what he did. |
MrColdsweat:The motives for alchemy may have been divination and spirituality. The methods were physical. |
MrColdsweat:So when the Chinese accidentally discovered how to make gunpowder and magnetic compass, both of which are scientifically explainable after the fact of discovery, you are saying that they were able to make that discovery through "black magic"? Their purposes for using these things may have been for what you call alchemy, but can you really say that use of the governing principles of gunpowder and compass is "black magic" ? Imagine someone striking an iron on a flint to hear if it made a musical sound...then discovered that it made a spark instead...would you be comfortable using the same structure of argument, to say that music was the cause of fire? As for alcohol...is it alchemists who have been making palm wine, all this time? I like the direction you are taking your argument; I am pushing back so that you can make it stronger. |
MrColdsweat:It's best you explain what you mean by alchemy, that gunpowder and compasses are a product of it, as you claim. |
Grandmeister:Unicorn, tooth fairy, Santa Claus...also in the English dictionary. |
MrColdsweat:I tire... kindly read check facts in context, before quoting. To make it easier for you, please read the provided link to the end . Thank you. https://www.truthorfiction.com/do-800000-children-go-missing-each-year-in-the-united-states/#:~:text=At%20least%20800%2C000%20children%20go%20missing%20in%20the,%E2%80%94%20or%20that%202%2C000%20are%20disappeared%20each%20day%3A |
Nooil:I tire, o. That's "burning of accused witches". Tested with false instruments that would find the accused "guilty", same as you and I would be found "guilty". Please research the topic before referring to it. Fear-mongering and power-grabbing at the root of it all. Nothing new to see, there. |
IMAliyu:Thank you for saying that. |
joyandfaith:I believe we can already explain how juju works. |
mastermaestro:Please tell me what witchcraft and magic are being taught abroad. |
Weed is legal in many countries. I see a valuable export crop. |
ExBanker:Gbam. Telling him not to help those who helped him, she shows questionable character, lack of generosity, inability to "do unto others...". She could have remained silent or said "I'm not part of this, it's your decision to make". Instead it looks like she's dating his money and success. |
bukatyne:Indeed, the opposite, as I believe you are suggesting. Proverbs 31. The good wife makes and sells her own products, buys property, gives to the poor. Sounds to me like she is not only very industrious, but makes and spends her own money. |
Rtk5:Rtk5, I don't know what to say any more. I both feel your pain, and see your weaknesses. I am not inside your wife's head, she is not here asking advice, so I can only suggest what you can do to help yourself, whether you are with your wife, by yourself, or with someone else. I feel you both don't have the skills for marriage. If you both want to stay married, then you both need to work on your communication skills, and also see whether you both respect each other. Maybe separation would be good for both of you to reflect on yourselves, basically hit the pause button on the marriage. If you are tired and want a divorce, that's an option too, but the communication problems will rise again as soon as you are with someone else. It is worth noting that you don't seem able to speak the whole facts of your matter, on an anonymous forum, where you asked for advice. So the keys for you are to face your whole truth, and learn to speak it, first to yourself, and then to your wife, and see where it goes from there between the two of you. |
MrBrownJay1:Does he have to beg? How about "okay dear, I've cooled down, but we need to talk about how we deal with our issues". Yes, they obviously have some communication issues, and they both need to work on them...however, only OP is asking for advice as far as I know, so he is being advised that the silent treatment is not the way to go about it. It's certainly the opposite of constructive communication. Staying silent until one finds words is one thing--silent treatment for a week, is something else! It's also pretty horrible for the kid to endure, speaking from experience. OP works hard to downplay his own role in the trouble, the way a kid does, so we are not only getting a one-sided story, we are not getting the whole one-sided story. Who even knows what the wife did, that the OP became upset? Maybe the wife is foolish for leaving over small matters. But maybe the wife is foolish to keep coming back, over large matters. We just don't have the whole facts, to judge the whole picture. |
MrBrownJay1:MrBrownJay1, I often agree with you, but in this case I do not. Not at this point, anyhow. The OP's reported problem is indeed that his wife left the family home with the kid. But getting at the reason why she did that, how OP himself is contributing the problem, and learning how to do things differently in order to avoid having these problems again, is the useful place to focus. There is a lot that we are not being told, and which is certainly where the root of the problem lies. |
[quote author=chuddyforlife post=92876690][/quote]Lamenting? I don't think so. Indeed, lack of trust and failure to be trustworthy, do not make a happy home. But OP's household has been based on trust, and apparent worthiness of trust, for at least the last ten out of eleven years. I did read where he feels less love for the eldest child. He says it's because he's not sure she's his. Will he suddenly start loving her again if he discovers she's his? The conflict is taking place in the OP's mind, for now: -whether his love for a child is conditional, and why he feels less love for her, if it turns out that she's his -whether the last ten years of fidelity from his wife no longer count for him, even if the first year was doubtful -whether the peace and happiness of his household around him is worth more, or less, to him than having only his blood children in it. These are questions he needs to resolve before any DNA test, because if he acts with a mind unprepared for what the knowledge may bring, his whole family will be affected and himself with it, and there is no taking back his actions and going back to the way things were, if he doesn't like the result. OP is indeed free to seek a DNA test. Knowledge is good. But he needs to prepare his mind, before he trades a smaller knot in his peace, for a larger one--the risk of losing all of what he values. You are free to disagree with me. But the dilemma being discussed is not yours, but the OP's, and he has different priorities than you do. A blessed Sunday to you too. |
TheNaijaMan:There are a brother and sister known to me, who grew up assuming they were the children of their mom and dad, both of whom are late. Of recent, the sister remembered an odd incident from her childhood, where a man who wasn't her dad, came to visit to "see his son". She put that memory in the back of her mind until now, when she mentioned it to her brother, and both got their DNA tested. They are half siblings by the same mother. Further findings revealed that their "dad" is father to neither. Half-forgotten memories surfaced, suggesting that that their dad was aware. But both parents took that information with them to the grave. It was modern technology, and the memories of a child more observant than adults accounted for, that brought the secret forth again. The brother and sister, who should be enjoying their grandchildren and their elder years, are now reevaluating their entire identity and assumptions of who they are. They don't know why their "father" had no kids of his own; perhaps he was impotent. But he raised them both as his own, while trying his best to keep the truth from them. Their family has said, no matter what the DNA says, they are still family the same as they always have been, and the new information doesn't change their social relationship. What can we take away from this example? Children are smarter and more observant than we think. Familial bonds are strong. Resurfacing secrets bring confusion and pain. Knowledge can be hurtful. Some people would say, it would be better not to know. The brother and sister I mentioned, want the whole truth, and are doing everything they can to find it. I chose the moniker NiCurious for a reason--I am curious and like to know the truth. But truth and knowledge come with responsibility and consequences. I realize that I haven't given you direct answers in this post, but you wanted to hear about experiences and outcomes, so here you go. |
Dude, I am not playing victim, but it seems that you are. Reread the original post. OP wishes to keep his family intact, and continue his good relationship with his wife. He likes his life the way it is, but he is curious to know about his daughter. He does not like that he is feeling doubt, and feeling less affection toward the girl. He is curious to know the truth, without potentially turning his world upside down, when he finds out. OP is free to do a DNA test for knowledge sake, but he would be well advised to think ahead, what he will do with this knowledge, and how it will affect those around him, and himself. Supposing he discards the child as it seems you would do--whom does that benefit? Not the child who has done nothing. Not her siblings. Not his wife, who he feels has been faithful, all these long years. If you are the type who thinks of nothing but money, why would he throw away his investment so far, on someone so promising? He has been well pleased with this child, in her own right. If she is indeed another man's child, it is the other man's loss. Families do indeed raise children that aren't theirs. It's called adoption. My advice is to the OP and his sensibilities, and not to you. If you don't want to raise a child that isn't yours, don't go raw when your girlfriend is still dating around. And if you do, please, when your pregnant girlfriend marries another man, fight tooth and nail for a DNA test to prove the child is yours, so you can raise it. chuddyforlife: |
