₦airaland Forum

shaybebaby:
Lol@ cane being applied liberally. However in my opinion, making excuses based on a diagnosis and caning are two polar opposites. The former being inaction in the face of a problem and the latter being taking action albeit incorrectly.

Thing is there is no " one size-fits-all" approach. Just as we are individuals, same with neurodisability, same diagnosis but different personalities and responses to input. The key is to keep evolving to meet the child's needs.

My son is a very literal thinker, so in the summer, when he was naughty, I started smacking him. It worked for a while and then, he got to school and started clumping other kids... And me too.

I had to think, " how can I convey that hitting is bad, if I do the same to him?". I needed a rethink.
My solution: I had to understand the why, which was him craving attention from me, so being naughty was a way to get. The more attention he gets, the better his behaviour.

In all, it's not all doom and gloom, a reorientation of expectations and tons of patience is what is needed. And plenty of support, for them and for oneself.

Thank you for your wishes, I know he will grow up to be a fine young man.

Ouch at him hitting back.

You are very correct, there is no "One-size fits all" method. I and Himself are not people who responded to caning or typical Nigerian parenting tactics (my favourite family member is the one who constantly talked to me in a calm, understanding voice. She ranks higher than my mum). On the other hand, I have a brother that Boarding School was the making of him. Baby E is the same: I think she's beginning to hit and it's not just naughtiness. I don't smack her that much (she knows her warning smacks and will even administer it to her hand when I ask her "are you being naughty?". And she has a tendency to throw my phone away a lot. So 2017 will be the year of "Mummy not being glued to her handset all the time". I think she wants my full attention so I can applaud when she's using white crayon to complete her design masterpiece on the tv stand .

That's why I query some of the diagnosis of mental issues I hear of in the US: what is normal? Your definition of "this is an abnormal child who has a mental issue" may be a Russian's definition of normal. Every child is different and requires different ways to handle their issues. Lord knows, I wasn't on the normal scale of the Nigerian child. But I think I'm normal...or am I...(duh duh duhhhhhh!!! )

Shaybebaby, Merry Christmas to you guys!

It's interesting that you say a lot of his behaviours, you had them too with no diagnosis. BTW, I'm sure your little man is going to grow up wonderfully too

My friend with ADHD, once he was given that diagnosis, it became a crutch for his parents: "he's like that because he's suffering, hormonal imbalance, he can't help himself" became their song. It helped them live with any guilt that arose from wondering if they were parenting properly. But I have nephews like him and 3 are currently adults and are doing fine, because no-one gave them that diagnosis and wrote any any prescription other than "cane, apply liberally"

Gerrard59, Powder and Dettol are not as safe as we think, especially for babies.

Powder particles are known to cause Respiratory issues in babies. Most paediatricians will recommend your baby goes powder-free. Cases are springing up that constant use of powder in the genital area leads to certain cancers (and that was so-called safe brands like Johnson's talcum). In my mum's era, you had Asthma and breathing issues because it was harmattan or it was inherited. Now, people with no history of that are having kids developing Asthma.

There are several studies that show that there is no evidence to prove Antibacterial soaps are better than regular soaps. Worse, Triclosan and Triclocarban and other chemicals in these soaps are being studied and early tests show that those things are hormone-disrupting. That's why the US FDA is banning those ingredients from soaps from 2017.
But take a look at the ingredients of Delta soap, Dettol soap and some other antibacterial soaps. And that is the first thing Mummy and Daddy will use for their kids once they start attending school. When regular soap works just fine and I say that as someone who cloth diapers.
And no-one on any Nigerian Regulatory Body is saying anything. Do they even do studies? Really, shouldn't they scrap almost all Science courses in Nigerian universities since they barely do any reseach or carry out studies?

I should have done a thread on this since but meh...

Most of the causes of early pregnancy is rape. Almost all the past reported cases were rape by father, uncles, stepfather, neighbours, brothers, cousins, boyfriends of older kids or child minders, forced prostitution etc.

It is dangerous to a female in this world...

Lol!

They have been saying this since probably 2007, that they will close Olusosun and Solous 1 and 2. They installed pipes to tap the gas at Olusosun since, when the landfill was at peak gas production level...and did nothing. Instead they took World Bank loans and siphoned the money and be speaking English about Carbon Credits to reporters with hefty browm envelopes in their pockets. Private companies begged for opportunity to turn Olusosun into energy centres, the way Govt officials will show up for meetings without bothering to read their proposals would make you ashamed to be Nigerian. Are they using the sorting facilities to maximum efficiency yet? Did they not frustrate the efforts of Recycling companuies, refuse to assign LGAs to the different sorting facilities so that their Waste Collection coys have a more streamlined collection plan?

Lagos state is good at propanganda!

shaybebaby:
There is no cure for autism. It is a lifelong neurodisability which can be managed.

Do you think you are seeing or hearing of higher cases of a diagnosis of Autism where you are?

Good morning.

I hope it's not too late but fabmum and Dtush, could you lead us in prayers this morning? Thank you kindly.

zemaye:

How have you been? How's the baby?

Well, a lot of this is a localised issue in my opinion. Where are the worldwide studies showing corresponding rise in cases in Africa, Asia and Europe? Thats how you know MMR vaccine causes Autism. And I'm speaking from a place where I know a lot of anti-vaccers (who did their best to convince me) versus well-educated, practised medical siblings (who questioned my sanity if I refused our vaccines. One is on the forefront of Paediatric care in several African countries).

Nigeria is beginning to switch to a more processed, less organic lifestyle (how many of us have eaten Fresh fish this year or fresh chicken? How many of us will choose a leafy salad over rice and stew? How many of us exercise?). These are not Western ideas given to us, this is how our grandparents lived. Barring diseases from hygiene and poor cultural practises and other inherited illnesses, an average farmer in the 1940s had a high chance of living till 80 than a banker of today: he ate well, exercised well and had never tasted processed foods. So if you could survive Childhood, Malaria and Typhoid, your chances of growing old was high. And Agbo was effective (not whatever we drink now, the old school remedy).

Nowadays, the average Nigerian abuses Antibacterial meds. Drinking it like Tom-Tom. Any small illness a baby has, it's "break out the Augmentin!". If that doesn't work, "time to prescribe another antibiotic!". I constantly forward mums cases to my siblings and irritated, they ask them to ask their Drs to check for allergies instead. Same with Malaria meds and Painkillers: "I feel feverish, so heading to the Pharmacy to buy Coartem and Diclofenac". With all this, I expect more issues to rise in Nigeria.

As for the US, never have I seen a country which loves its medications like those guys. They have adverts for heavy medications running side-by-side with their most popular tv shows. Seriously, half way through "Jane the Virgin" will pop an Ad for medications for Asperger's, heart disease, frequent urination and more. The Pharma industry there has made a fortune off their For-Profit Healthcare. The nurses will stare at you and make snide comments when you refuse an epidural during labour (as you get wheeled in at 4cm dilation, they offer you that needle. Compare that to Naija). Because of all this, a huge distrust has grown in the mind of the public against Vaccines and meds, especially when the whole country seems to be diagnosing all sorts (I had a friend who had ADHD, a painkiller addiction due to an accident and I was forced to tell him that in Naija they would have recommended more Discipline as a child rather than meds to his parents). So there is a backlash against chemicals in everything and anti-vaccinations. And states are having to pass legislation forcing schoolkids to vaccinate.

So, will I trust the data from US Doctors? Not until I see corresponding data from other continents who have different lifestyles but show the same results. I live in Nigeria and we took all our vaccines but I try not to create a too-sterile environment around my kid. She plays outside, eats off the floor of the house, eats a lots of fruits and home-cooked meals as much as we can (but we aren't perfect), stays away from powder and we don't use Dettol. So far, she has had one cold once in her life and only got a skin reaction to sandflies.

Sensible decisions, side-by-side with Science. That's how we roll.

pheesayor:
Good day Mamas, I want to thank everyone who has given one advice or the other when I bring my concerns. My baby is three months today, I look back and I'm grateful to you all on this thread, thank you very much, God bless you all.

Her name is Ebunoluwa Adeola Ogunjimi and she says hi to you all

Ebun must show up next week Friday for Christmas edition of #Threadbabies!! Or we will fine you a very happy 3 months birthday to her.

Eminya, 3/4 of the cases being treated with Antibiotics is actually an Allergy. Babies are very easily allergic to stuff and they outgrow it. Which is why I always say "if after 7 days of antibiotics with no improvement or 2 weeks of different antibiotic treatment, it's probably an allergy and requires Loratidine from the Dr".

I think we as Nigerians feel we are immune to allergies, but the world, the environment and our food has changed.

What can you use for a cloth wipe?

Well, plain good ol' water works really well. But sometimes, you can feel you just need a little bit of extra clean. So I do a mix of the stuff below or you can use any of the other pics: soap, oil, water. It cleans lovely and smells nice. Just don't mix too much. The Lavender and Teatree oils are antibacterial and will help to fight a rash and you only nees 5 to 8 drops per mix so you will never finish it. If you are lucky to score some Organic Castile soap (it's milder than regular soap), a spoonful is all you need. Otherwise a spoonful of Babywash does the same. And water. Mix and keep in a bottle. Think 5 drops of essential oil, 3 tbsp of olive/almond/coconut oil, a tbsp of soap and about 5 to 6 cups of water.

#ThingsIMissAsAMummy: having a nice house.

That yellow box is the medicine box. That is its permanent position. Because that dispenser and the tall chest of drawers are the only places Baby E cannot reach in the house. She has even successfully climbed the Dining Table.

Those white marks are White crayon. You see, I laid down A2 big sheets and gave her her crayons. But colour white (why the $!@# do they make colour white sef??) wasn't showing up. So she looked for a more suitable background: the tv stand. It has not removed since Tuesday and she goes back daily to complete her All-White masterpiece.

Pic no 3 was what I thought my house would look like and had started buying stuff for it. How naive of me

#ThingsIMissAsAMommy: walking around by myself. Being able to enter a room without being followed and walk out without being escorted. If she was an adult, I'd have her arrested for Stalking . Being able to go to the bathroom without leaving her in tears, banging on the door. If she thinks I'm walking too fast, she grabs onto my clothes. One day I got so pissed, I stripped and walked away bare-ar.sed. She rolled her eyes at me and grabbed my butt instead. So we continued wearing clothes lest the Ancestors got offended.

Yeah, it would be nice to be by myself for once...

fabmum:
And pls too does any mama know whr I can do dis Azin d information board in d photo shoot with d lil boy... See pic attached

cc @onegai and other sabi mamas
Thanks in advance

It's part of a package deal for Children's photoshoot. The photographer will organise it. The packages go from N55,000 to N70,000. Most of the Children's photographers on IG can handle it. Or you pay a printer to do one and put it on a board.

Good morning mamas. Because of what happened with Mitchhyy's pics, we will not do #Threadbabies today but will restart for a lovely Christmas edition next week and each picture will be timed (after an hour on an hour and a half has passed, please take it down). All of us should be on holiday by then so we should have plenty time to check in on the thread. So get ready, we wanna see Santa outfits and Christmas cloth and Bottom-box Does that sound like a good idea?

Today we can share stories with hastag #ThingsIMissAsAMommy. It should be interesting.

enque:
Good evening onegai, pls can I send u a pm?

Hello. Sure.

Apple19:
Good day house, pls I need help. My DD of 10months old started vomitting at every feed and added stool on the 3rd day, went to the hosp and doc gave Zinnat.

She also have rashed only by the arms and forehead. Her Blood level is now low as per the blood test result... Dos said I should buy Another baby food with iron and give astyfer!

Pls Doctors in the house...am so confused right now as my DD had dropped from 10.7kg to 8.38kg...pls help

What are they treating her for? Are you in Lagos?

LadyPrecy:
mums in the house please dont ignore. my 9months old dd has totally rejected her formula so it happened that this evening i was drinking a glass of warm milk (nido milk) and dd started dragn the cup with me so i quickly made her formula in a cup too and offered her but tasted it nd refused taking it yet she continued dragn my cup of milk and i gave her to drink and she gulped the whole content and was crying for more.. So my question is, is it ok to start giving her cow milk at 9months(nido milk) cc all mamas.

Cow milk before 12 months isn't recommended because it is not as nutritious as formula and they say it doesn't digest as well for them. But every child is different. Some kids don't want milk from 7 months and cow milk is sweeter than formula. So, what you can do is to buy a can of another brand of formular, see if she drinks it. If she rejects it, take her to her Dr; ask the Dr to take a look at her and both of you sit down together and come to a decision (maybe you give cow milk and make sure she's eating solids rich in calciums and vegetables and legumes to make up for what she may be missing, probably add a multivitamin). Because every child is different and what works for most kids may not work for yours.

helovesme:
. You should consider making Christmas cards as an activity using glitter, colourful cardboard, etc.

I will post a picture later of one my son 'made'.

Glitter, scissors and Baby E must never be uttered in the same sentence in front of anyone who likes Sanity and wishes not to spend Christmas in a hospital crying "I only turned away for 20 seconds". No sir, not for us.

Pretimum, Nataraj is in every Bookshop nowadays. A few years ago, they came into Nigeria and really cornered the market on cheap art stuff. Their crayons have good colour payout but don't bother with their poster colours. HTH.

Honestly I don't know why Nigeria can't make these stuff. Jobs going to foreigners, why are we importing crayon?? All you need is a base, safe pigments pigments and moulds, packaging and someone with a good Science and Health & safety background...

For all the mums asking for edible paint, the recipe is as follows:

1. Make pap.
2. Add food colouring
3. give a brush with a chubby handle (like a blush brush), it's even better if it's a short brush
4. Get a brush like this (they sell them in a lot of places like stationary stores and art stores). The fat short brush forces them to put their fingers in Pincer hold, which is what all humans have to know how to do.
5. Put child in bathroom or decide to yourself that you are in the mood to repaint your house walls.

The paint is actually quite pigmented when you make it. Your little artist can eat it.

Our painting below. You can view it at the Metropolitan Museum of Art, where it is hanging in the Impressionists Gallery. Times Magazine called it "a triumph of the century" and CNN interviewed my then 13 month old artists about what she was trying to express. A Japanese businessman offered us $10million in Bitcoins for it, but I turned him down. For the good of Society. #StraightFace

cc dtush, ajuwarhordes, pretimum

jummy004:
Hello mamas, pls my princess is having wt yoruba calls 'eela' in her bumbum n am now noticing 'alefo' too n d later is doing as if it wants to b spreading.
Note: am using mixture of shear butter n karinna promade (dats wt we used for my nephew n his body glows very well) then i use sudocream for her bombom wen i change her diaper. I dnt knw wer it came frm. Aldo mil did agbo for her b4 we left her place abt two days ago but am nt a fan of agbo.
Pls anybody dat has xperienced dis shld pls come to my aid. I dnt wnt any crocro on my baby's body. Thanks
Pls dnt waka pass

It could be a Fungal infection, Yeast infection. It could be reaction to wipes and diaper. Sudocrem generally should be able to handle antibacterial stuff so maybe it's fungal. "Alefo" and eela" are usually treated as fungal infections (from what I learned here from Yoruba mamas). Look up diaper rash due to yeast infection. If it looks similar, could be it.

comtem2011:
only if they know the address of whom they paid to. This is a game of risk. Those they paid to have paid someone too, so its a cycle.

well, if I paid N750,000 to someone and have their name and number, I'd be pretty motivated to find you. And I'm sure I could...

dtush:
@onegai, oya gimme more activities to keep my LO busy. We colored yday. Even though she does not chew the crayons, she still cannot help biting it.

See my Mini Da Vinci's work. We have started taking orders for self portraits.

Tell her she used colour Red in a very attractive manner, just like the Classical artist Titan

ajuwarhodes:
I bought an Indian product of non toxic crayons here in lagos (ilupeju)... That it is edible or not is what I don't know,beside my son is just 5months old and I honestly bought it for him,why? I don't know,but I known it's for future use,infact I bought colour books and so on.since one can't trust Chinese products,can we trust Indian's? Or all we can trust are UK n Yankee products?

You bought Nataraj. I bought it too. I really don't know, all I do know for sure is that cheap Chinese products for the African market are such a gamble. Our people will not even bother to protect us and say they should use quality, why should they? Use the Nataraj because Crayola is hard to find. Crayola is not edible, it's just no,-toxic.

For those who did MMM and someone paid you, please refund their money. People are planning on using police to get their money back from those they paid to last. Just avoid the wahala.

Envynot, DROP THIS ISSUE. Thanks.

Liftedhands:
Come out with your real moniker or just shut the Bleep up! Madam class captain will not see caution you for going on with this ish.

You keep mentioning WhatsApp group the one you Aline formed? Name the so called monikers on the group or forever keep eating shiit.

How many times have I said drop this? Or do you monitor my phone that you know whether or not I was one of those who reported her initial comment to be blocked?

If you guys want to keep going ahead, I'm pretty sure I and a few other monikers can leave this place for you so you can all go ahead and turn it into whatever you want. You won't miss us so no big deal. Again, I ask, "why so many people commenting on this matter constantly?" If you have a problem with anyone, take it to their PMs confidently. This is not the place for it.

comtem2011:
This is a public forum, opinions/advise should be dished out with love. Adding to someone's injury is not the best. Coming here to seek for advice should not be a death sentence. This place is not for scolding. Its a place where we seek for advice on our everyday life affairs.

Not everybody can take insult, I hardly ask questions but I give the little solution I can for others to learn from.

In other news! am angry, nobody asked of me.

To God be the glory. My sister got married on Saturday, it was a glorious day. She kept smiling throughout, Adesile is lucky to have her.

Congrats I think I remember your initial invite and you put up a pic.

Abeg everyone leave Get Help Worldwide. Even Ultimate Cycler has crashed. All these schemes will lead to tears.

BuddhaPalm:
Greed ke?

Onegai, my sister, I'm sure you ate Chicken today.

Nope! Chicken is not going extinct either.

Loisemm:
@Class captain Onegai , OK oo.
Lolz... I must confess its been quite entertaining though reading through the fight. Even some other mamas I never knew could fight like this joined in
I no talk again o.

Just wanted to say Congrats to You as you're expecting. Its like nobody noticed you let it slip while trying to bring order to the thread. Oh or maybe it was deleted. Congrats again.

tanksabunsch

crystalzoe:
@onegai
Ur doing great but its easy to see where Ur loyalty lies
And that stuff u wrote abt pregnancy thread?
Not nice at all. Every mama here was once pregnant.

Lol. You should look at my old posting history or ask Modath about when I was preggers, if she remembers any fight she had to settle. I don't carry anything on my head. If it is in the past, it is in the past. What I said, I'm not the only one who feels that way. I don't like fights for no reason and there is a better way to handle things. This could have been handled much, much easier.