₦airaland Forum

You might need to put the marriage on hold till you have that figured out.

all4zionlover:
Honestly I'm going through so much here. I'm losing it. I feel depressed, so much fear, unhappy and lonely. My husband's gambling habit has removed love and affection from our home.
He quickly finishes any money that comes to him. Either salary and anything in bet nija and concentrate on asking me for money. I'm have no job, I'm buy little things and resell. My capital is not even stable because all the financial expenses is on me. Yet he doesn't care. He keeps malice with me for not giving him money and not coming home to meet food.
This year, I have decided not to keep food for him so long as he can not bring money for feeding, for the children he claim he love and upkeep.
I've endure for too long and I'm getting fade up.

All my actions and his behaviour really makes me sad.
I have no love, respect for him.
I excessively worry for upkeep, school fees, bills, things we don't have at home. Everything is on me.
I'm so stressed and lonely. I feel I need a shoulder to rest on maybe to cry.
I'm so sad because our two sons are too attached to their father and I'm scared of their feelings if I decided to divorce their father

My first son wouldn't even go to bed until his father return back from work.

Have you been in this kind of situation?
What did you do? How do people survive this kind of situations?

Why not try therapy? Truth is gambling is a big issue most folks even abroad do battle with. It's pretty hard to come out of it because the more he tries, the deeper he might fall into it. I think therapy is the best way out, and it works. I do have a friend who was so deep into gambling that a once upon a time good looking dude is now reduced to a miscreant.


For those saying this is Nigeria and therapy isn't feasible, get off it. Alot of folks have gone through it and it works.

Wiseandtrue:
Will you provide him with the machine Abi you provide am, him no use am

Or do you suggest he sits around waiting for a machine

So who is mentally lazy now

Don't mind the dude, one of those folks who wanna act wise but do sound foolish

SLAP44:
For me, it's the number of youthful voters that makes me smile. 48 million youths cannot be voting for old, senile, weak, frail, expired and analogue candidates to lead them to the past.

Vote for someone who understands your generation.

E go shock you

Pipe dream. Won't hold water.

Johnthejohn:
That serves him right.
I hate Gays and Lesbians with passion

Even the God you serve won't judge this easily.

m4una:
Your family matter

Wisdom will not kill you

after4:
Will you give this advice to your brother or son?

You dey mind that bastard?


Fuckers like that go their Papa house you no go fit chop there and Las Las dem go come online dey find guy wey go buy them iPhone and all. Awon omo oju o ro lari.


I spit on her

All this from an over used engine


You better keep her at Bay.
After one for that matter. She wise like that na hin she after one.




I wonder where guys meet ladies like this

2dice01:
Red flag all the way

She want you to be subbing for her
She want expensive date
She want expensive lifestyle
All on your head


She is for G-boys and Sugar daddies

She's for the street.

I wonder why people don't see chubby as beautiful...

Tony elumelu ko tomisin ni.



Abeg first three.

PrimadonnaO:
You're the one who's not a good person for holding grudges against your sister.

What did she do to you?

Her husband is her head.. her own family comes first.

Am not a good person... And you don't even know me or what I am talking about. Well enjoy your holidays.

unzend:
What you need to deliver

ARCHITECTURAL DRAWINGS
1. Site location plan
2 site plan
3 floor plans ( ground, first second etc)
4 roof plan
5 sections (2)
6 elevations ( front, sides , rear)
7 windows & doors schedules

STRUCTURAL
1 Foundation layouts & details
2 suspended floor layouts & details
3 colum details
4 beam details + roof beams
5 stairs details
6 calculations sheet

Post it here and I send you the balance after review.

You are the scammer cos you are rushing me to pay without delivering satisfactorily.

Has the guy delivered the job? What was your agreement before now.


I don't know your religion, but if he has delivered what you ask of him even tell prophet said pay the labourer his wages before his sweat dries up.

cana882:
These are actions that we can forgive but can’t forget. My sister used her money to travel to Dubai instead of assisting me. Asin she didn’t even encourage me or comment on my travel plans. Like I created a WhatsApp group for us and shared my idea but they didn’t even comment. Instead, they went discussing how bad the idea was in my absence. 3 months after getting to Dubai, she went back to Nigeria with NOTHING!! This is same person I’ve been helping her business and even planning on bringing her over.
The worst thing a person would do is to undermine someone’s tomorrow for your today’s pleasure. I’ve learnt this a long time ago and have benefited from assisting others.
She should keep following this generation-Z’s e-warriors.

That's the word,. Forgive not forget

Sweetvie:
That's the thing... Nothing goes for nothing. she should never have moved to her parents place

Even at that,. She should about tried helping her bro. My fiancee is the first and am always proud of her when I see how she loves and can give everything for her siblings.

cana882:
Don’t know why people don’t understand family relationships. At the end, family is everything. When I was about travelling, my siblings all ignored me. Even when my mum sold her land to add to my savings, they all got angry that she’s wasting funds. Now, I’m the one sending all of them hundreds of thousands and even trying to bring them over.
Let her keep underrating her brother. 5yrs from now, he’ll remind her about this stupid act and I hope her foodstuff business will grow so big that she won’t need any help.

Already told her. Let's hope 18 years from now her daughter won't be here to rant about her rich uncle who is useless to her. My sis also made me cry because of 300k. I needed 1.3 to sort some stuffs then, and I had 1m. This same sister of mine I paid for during masters even out of the little but I put family first. Her turn came she was complaining that her hubby wanted changing her car and they need money for some project. I even asked her to lend me not give. Mehnn I cried like real hot tears. Say in my car for like an hour crying just parked somewhere. At the end, a total stranger I once did business with was who helped out. Am doing great now but mehn I always rememeber like yesterday.

Sweetvie:
Then she should keep her money and start her business

She should also pack out of her parents house or pay rent. No one is entitled to ntin

tollyboy5:
I shake my head for stvpid people on this forum.
Ladies are very funny, if the first born was a guy and the second born was a lady people will accuse the guy of not helping his younger sis.
But now it's a lady , nothing concern her with her younger brother lol.

Life isn't fair to men. My fiancee is the first and she told me point blank when we met that she's the first and if we settle she still need to help her other siblings pull through. Entitlement mentality has nothing to do with family like have been saying. We are bound to help each other.

Kdsml:
Thank you so much you says it all my daughter should come first i cannot put a grown up man before her , i haven't touched the 300k yet the money i have used to buy xmas clothes and wrapper was given to me by my daughter god mother. I have given the wrapper to my aunty she is grateful

I just hope 18yrs from now the girl won't be writing and cursing her rich uncle who doesn't give a hoot about her. It starts from days like this. Wisdom is profitable to direct I hope God gives you the wisdom you need at this time.

Lemme ask, if the guy couldn't get the money and it ended up affecting him, what will happen next?

[quote author=Cazzim post=119422129][/quote]They will continue ill advising her. The other lady talking about entitlement mentality has forgotten there are exception to that stuff entitlement. Families are meant to be there no matter what betide. That's why it's called family not relative.

1Sharon:
You're contradicting yourself. You said family is so and so, but you made money come between yourself and your sister.


If you're a grown adult, you aren't owed anything, so you sound kind of entitled to bear grudged towards your sister because she didn't give you 300k.

Did you and your sister have an agreement that told help each other out financially?

Did you pay part of her Masters out of your own freewill or because she asked?

Make life better you in what way? Can you be more specific, in what you wanted the 300k for because it doesn't seem like you needed it because you were sick and helpless or destitute.

Am not here to trade banters with you. I just aired my opinion. Have fun and merry xmas

Sweetvie:
I feel you bruh
You know how mom can be... She will never return the money. The lady clearly need the money for her own family... Not that she did not care about her mom or brother but she av her own family too. What is she suppose to do if it don't work out? Crying to the mom? In that same house the little brother that she gave that money may be the one to shut her up later.
@bolded
You got to let go
You can't expect her to choose you instead of her husband lol you will do dsame too

One lesson,. Whatever you give family don't expect it back.

1Sharon:
The boy is 24 years not under 18. He's an age where he's old enough to cater for himself. He needed the money for school fees, he wasn't sick and helpless in a hospital.

What do you mean your sister chose her husband before you?

Did you want your sister to throw her husband away and marry you instead?


If your sister has kids, the family she has created are now a priority over the family she left behind.

You sound like a selfish and self-centered person.

Selfish? Lol. You might be 60 years and be successful but one way or another you might still need help somedays. Pick her husband before me.... The earliest you learn your spouse is your only family who is not your relative the better for you. Divorce is quite rampart this days, your spouse can choose to leave, your partner can leave at a time of distress but family is where one runs too at the end.


About the sister thing, I needed some help at some point that could have made life better for me. I had like a million saved needed just 300k. My sister point blank told me her husband wanted changing his car and other family stuffs. I cried deeply as I also paid part of her masters fee before marriage even when it was not convenient. I ended up letting go and when the small god go, the bigger ones come. A complete stranger ended up helping. Am good now but it really laid a kibosh on our relationship.

Most of the folks here are telling you not to mind your mum. Watch how you create if not an everlasting enemity between yourself and your brother. Even your mum won't be able to bridge the gap. Family is everything. Your brother might be desperate for the money. If you are to get an house rent won't you path with close to the amount and this is your blood brother we are talking about here. My sister once choosed her husband before me years ago and till today I still carry the grudge. Don't create an enemity, cut your budget cost for the business and help your brother even if not everything. Las Las that your hubby might loose guard you,. The 300k might finish or get stolen but the people you have are everything.

Very shameless bastard.


I hate dancing folks not to even talk of a dancing theif

been dramatic can be annoying though. But this is way extreme. The deceased could have been dramatic but the killer was extreme.

kingreign:
Last year I bought two tyres brand new. 3 months down the line, one developed a huge bulge, the other started vibrating only to discover it was bent. My true pressure was 30PSI always. My crime was driving from Uyo to Calabar and back then these tyre went bad.

But Tokumbo tyres I use never had such nastiness.

I have been using tokunbo tyres on my car now for three years. Funny I bought the tyres then due to financial constraints. The new tyres I bought for my other car after wards is gone, but this tokunbo ones light truck abi wetin Dem call am still dey very good state.

Worldwyde:
Sold it,besides that one blew a long time ago. Check jiji for gs 2jzge engine,igbo are crooks. The will remove the injector mouth and sell it seperate. I've not driven more than 2 weeks,got drunk and parked inside a mini gutter at home. So I abandoned it and travelled home.. when I'm back,heads will roll.

Talking of head. You mean your neighbours?

To whom the gods want to destroy. They first make mad.

Uptheante:
But would you ever agree to give your fellow guy 10k from your 'church mind'?
Also, do you use your aclaimed church mind to give financially help your mum & sisters?
The point is, this bitch disrespected & used you & u still dashed her money from your church mind.
The only thing u may gain from her is the sex, so if you don't want sex from her, then let her work for whatever money you want to give her or she'll see u as a fool & laugh at you with her friends behind your back.

Can I give my fellow guy 10k,. Why not if not. Can I give my siblings or mum 10k,. Haba 10k. Dude I get your point and about the sex, I don't even see sex with her as reason, someone seems stranded the first intuition as human is to be of help if you can, the gender can go to blaze. What can I get from her after sex? Lemme ask you, all the ladies in your life you talk too and deal with, is it only in the bases of sexual favours?