₦airaland Forum

Jennnnnnnnyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy you are rotten LOL

who says I did not sample the goodies  first   It is just better to wait

dayokanu:
^^ Mo jeri e.

I trust you. Who would allow them to sell you bad market for the next 40yrs

I knew it was going to be good before we did it. It only happened because we were not disciplined. I knew we were sexually compatible.

@ OP you need to relax. From the post you started about who greets who first in the morning to going on hunger strike and then getting mad because she eats what you abandoned it seems that you are a big contribution to the wahala. I am sure your wife is eating the food and probably licking her fingers to exagerrate the fact that she does not care if you do not eat. You two are suffering from new marriage syndrome. It seems you people do not have problems so you go out and find them. On a serious note though do you really get upset because she does not say good morning before you do? Would you be upset if your best friend was spending the night and you notice that he does not say good morning first? Should it be different because she chose to marry you? I know you guys will figure this stuff out. It is not enough for you to be driving recklessly. WTF

dayokanu:
TOH,

Dont mind them let them be deceiving themselves.

You better test drive what you are buying else na love machine go be your husband for the next 40-50yrs

You can talk about sex honestly. Understand what each others expectations are. Unless someone is a pathological liar you should be able to have a good understanding of what you both expect when it comes to sex. I believe in talking frankly about it. The physical part is not a must. I did not say it is easy but I know it can be done if two people agree on it. Anyway I don't want to divert the thread.

LadyT:
Your a Hot little thing arent you Dayo?

That's it a nutshell. Hot. She will still be there after the wedding. Why confuse things with sex when you should be clear minded in making the most important decision of your lives

dayokanu:
You are definitely joking about the part in bold.

Sex till after marriage? Say wetin happen?

Of course I am serious. Abi you are not man enough to wait?      

I think she is beautiful. She used to be ridiculous back in the day when she used tomatch everything she wore. Eyeshadow, shoe, bangles, even contacts. She has grown up now and I believe she only gets better anytime I watch her. I will actually pick up a movie and try to watch it just because she is on the cover.

mummy3:
Pray very well-o, Because atime e dey sweet for beginning then e go bitter later. According to you, you said he's the bread winner. If you get married now and start having children, the cash inflow to his mum will drop, she wouldnt want to understand if the guy is married or not. She'll say you are the one stopping her son from giving her the way he used to. So be careful. Limit your visit, be good but minimize it. Dont allow her to get used to your too good. Im talking out of experiened. You know mother inlaws feel their daughter inlaws are their arrival that will come and block all the good things their sons has been giving to them or that will come and divert their son's heart/caring from them.

I totally agree with you. That is the one thing that I could never do. I never set that sort of thing for myself. I personally think it is a mistake. I know when I went to Nigeria my husbands oldest sister was a little pushy but I stood my ground. I don't like it when they feel like you should be tested. If you start that way then they know what to keep expecting from you. Even after I stood my ground with her she was cold at first but by the end of the night we were gisting. She's in her 60s and we talked until 2am in the morning. It was nice. Go figure. I did not even enter her kitchen. I had two kids with me and that was my focus. When the food was ready, I ate and then cleaned up after my kids and myself. As for doing his laundry (even with a washine machine) I feel somethings are better left till after the wedding eg sex, his laundry, accepting expensive gifts, his daily cooking etc. You have to remember that you are marrying each other so he is being tested by you just as much as he is testing you.

Kenezi:
In America, racial minority represent 11.4 percent of the total U.S. population. The FBI's Uniform Crime Report (UCR, 1991) stated that of 10,516,399 arrests in 1990, Whites (Caucasians) accounted for 68.96 percent (7,251,862), African-Americans 28.99 percent (3,049,299), American Indian/Alaskan Natives 1.1 percent (115,345), and Asian/Pacific Islanders 0.95 percent (99,893). The Sourcebook of Criminal Justice Statistics 1990 indicates that national incarceration rates are also disproportional in the number of minorities present:*

(A) Whites 48.21% (343,550)
(B) African-Americans** 47.01% (334,952)
(C) American Indians/Alaskan Natives .84% ( 5,994)
(D) Asian/Pacific Islanders .35% ( 2,480)
(E) Not known 3.6% ( 5,587)

http://www.doc.state.ok.us/offenders/ocjrc/94/940650k.htm

http://www.prisonpolicy.org/graphs/raceinc.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/File:U.S._incarceration_rate_by_race_2.gif

If you can disprove it go ahead.

It is a known fact that the justice system is tougher on blacks. Not making excuses for any race but it is a fact that a white and black person can commit the same crime and the black person is more likely to get a much more tougher sentence. That's just the way it is right now in America. Things are changing slowly though but this is the reality of today. Maybe you should do some research on that also

My cousin was pulling crap like this when he first got married. At a point no one was seeing eye to eye with him. He would get hell at home and when he would call any of us to complain he would be left feeling like a total agabaya. Things did not change until he changed his friends. It seems your husband needs to change his friends. Show me your friends and I will tell you who you are.
Also why did you want to follow them out. I personally do not subscribe to the idea that I should chase women away from my husband. It just will not happen. I would rather spend that energy on something else. If someone is going to cheat they will cheat. You just have to believe that your commitment and respect for each other is what will keep people at bay when temptation comes. I know you have no reason to even trust your husband right now but you cannot be following him around. Your husband obviously is not remorseful. I am beginning to think he only told you because the lady probably threatened to tell you. It is really dissappointing to hear that he is still trying to play games because I was rooting for him.
Your husband should be keeping his butt in the house and when he wants to leave he should ask you to come along. It is on him to show that you can trust him. Anything he gets now he brought on himself.

ROTFLMAO. I will bail her out. Let's be serious though. I think the advice she should be getting is how to take the next step. He most likely has not told the whole truth but something made him say the little he has. They are obviously going to move on with their marriage. I believe infidelity can be forgiven if the one in the wrong is truly remorseful. If he is remorseful he will do all in his power to make his wife trust him again even if it takes the rest of his life. There is no reason to think here that he is not on that track.

aisha2:
Yes he is Nigerian. Not only socks and dishes toilet, body ordour etc. I don't know if anyone has said anything about work

wow. suprised to hear he is Nigerian.

Thanks for that video deejay20. In addition I am not sure why we are stuck on questions asked us by ignorant high school kids. It is silly really. I went to high school here and got similar questions. In fact some idiot asked me if I swam here. Of course I told them yes I swam very fast. Key word here though is high school. I am yet to see an educated adult that would ask that. It might also be where people live also. Maybe for some of us it is different because we have had mostly positive interactions.

aisha2:
Note, his feet do not naturally stink, he just refuses to change socks from dirty smelly socks to new clean socks, she bought him a lot, he refuses to shower and wear body spray, he showers when he needs too, if the weather is cold, once in 3 days, he does dry clean and goes to work, thatt bad.

Is he Nigerian?

smile11s:
AA have no culture,  they are lost people of this world.  Whatever culture they have that must have spread from USA to Japan is a deceiving culture. Only negative people from diff parts of the world know their culture. Conservative people see it as a misleading culture,

Gbam!

Why are you in their country then? There are Nigerians in Nigeria that hustle everyday to make ends meet. Many of them do not want to live anywhere else but in Nigeria so if your culture is so pure why not live in Nigeria were our culture drives everything we do just like your mates that have made the choice to live there. Has your superior culture made Nigeria better? There is the good and bad elements in every culture. Your culture is definitely not an exception. The nerve of some people. The only reason you can even go to a school right now and sit in a classroom and get the same education that your fellow white student gets is because of African Americans.

DeeJay20:
I am really looking forward to a time when more African-Americans will be contributing
strongly on Nairaland, whether we like it or not. Africa needs the imput both
intellectually, skills-wise and financially of African Americans to move forward.
We need one another and thats just the plain truth.

Amen to that

First of all I really really really hate that word "akata". It has the same connotation as n*igger to me. Just something for us to think about. Those of us with children here in the US. Do you think that people will separate your children from any other African American? At the end of the day your children are African American. No matter how you try to break it down.

Congratulations Mr and Mrs

What is my business with my mother's uterus. People just like to find something to have a headache about.

This one that the woman is seeing visions of you dying is a serious matter. Your husband is exposing his family to something potentially dangerous. I am sure it will not be easy to forgive but I think he is remorseful that's why he told you. As long as he does not come back tomorrow and say she got pregnant from the sucking her breasts then you guys might have a chance at working things out

Madonna's husband got almost 70 million out of her. If the woman had money the man gets his cut when he leaves. I tire for all these whiny men. It does not all of a sudden change because it is the man that made more money. Let us not even talk about the very obvious fact that the person he is calling a liability was raising the kids that they both laid down and made together. While he was out there building a house for THEM she was in the home building a life for THEM. How many of you men would walk away from your marriage without a penny of you wife hit the jackpot and wins 100 million dollars. Will you be gracious enough to leave with just the clothes on your back after all it was a money she used to buy the ticket SMH

there is a name for it Obsessive Compulsive Disorder

chic2pimp:
Yep that's me

I have seen those countless threads and as long as they are not calling their wives nasty names I will refer them to a gynaecologist. This case is different. The man will just not use a toothbrush. I don't think that this is something that you sit down and start talking to a friend of your husband or a pastor about. Everybody is different. She is obviously at her wits end. I really don't see anything wrong with asking anonymously on a public forum.

debest1:
My point exactly, so what if the guy is unhygenic he is still her husband for goodness sake! show some respect and stop washing your filthy linen in public

Do you know her husband? Do you know her? It is better than telling your husbands friend to talk to him because his funk is giving you breathing problems. Unless she put her husbands first and last name there and the name of their village I don't see your point

afrobaby:
The post is kinda funny, but if it's real,then I think there may be a greater problem than what the wife is seeing now, people don't just change, something must have triggered it, u need to talk to your husband and make him feel u are not irritated by him(though hard now), let him feel at ease and I guess he will open up.
I know most men are lazy/dirty, and once they are married, they expect the wife to do the clean up, wetin b d woman job self, lol, let her lean it up and shower for him and brush his teeth, afterall, u be his helpmeet now, lol

My dad and husband are the total opposite of this situation. My husband can be messy but everything else is even excessive. He spends so much time flossing that I am sure one day he will floss off his gums. My dad is a neat freak too. Everything has to be a certain way for him. Sometimes the other end of the spectrum can drive you crazy too.

So sad. I can't believe that a car got hit that hard and no airbags deployed. It doesn't even look like it has airbags. The airbags could have saved his life. May his soul rest in peace and may God comfort his love ones. So sad

May her soul rest in peace

This whole bride price thing is so annoying to me. I can understand doing something as a significance so really even a cowrie shell should do. It used to be worth something before. The blackberry thing is so embarrassing. That is why eloping might not be a bad thing. Blackberry indeed

I don't even know where to go with this. Has she ever asked him why he does not like to shower or brush his teeth? There has to be a reason

micklplus:
Nice topic!
My in law ehn! Chai na ACCA exam o at first!
My wife was last born . She's got five brothers(chronic players)! so, naturally it was a very difficult session except for the first born.
The father didn't like me a bit! Even though, I am good looking and I have got good job. The father said "I AM A PLAYER" and that I am going to play their baby of the house (my wife) the mother was cautious too so, I had to step up my parole in order to make them like me. I was calm and myself and stopped laughing with them and I was always at my best whenever I was going there.

That first day was hell and the father didn't even answer my greetings! I was not even offered ordinary water.

Anyway, the rest na history and I am so happy to have married their daughter. We are so cool. The father, mother, brothers and her only elder sister. Infact, one of the brothers just left my office now!

I am so part of the family now and all thanks to God.

ROTFLMAO. Okay that had me seriously rolling. Poor thing. Why did you not say your mouth was dry? LOL
I met mine for the first time after we were married with kids. They are all in Nigeria so we had to travel down there without my husband. I guess it was easier for me in a way because there no reason to impress anyone. I had already been talking to most of them on the phone for years.

[quote author=Shy-One link=topic=626154.msg7959352#msg7959352 date=1300757844]thank you for the reminder - you are definitely correct - thank you for your wisdom and your tempered words.[/quote]I am glad you see the wisdom in her words. Children are definitely a blessing from God. You might as well respect that.