₦airaland Forum

dayyyyyyyyyyyyyyummmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

That romangoddess is hot!!! how come I havent heard of her before

So all you women out there take note! Being a wife is nothing to be proud about anymore. Being a mother will soon join the list

This bush rat that managed to go abroad with her patriarchal father's money, this common girl that wrote a few books (all of them booooring as hell except for 'half of a yellow sun') and now thinks the world rotates around her, this wife who does not care how her husband feels about her antics but wants to be loved and respected as a person and looking for who will carry her travelling bag, is now the spokeswoman for feminism. Lol!

Anyways, If hilary clinton coould be swayed by something so petty on her social status, it shows how weak minded she was in the first place. Something she put by herself and was proud of, one girl from nowhere talked and she quickly changed it, shows how weak minded and easily swayed she would have been if she was made the POTUS.

kapelvej:
Thanks for the new dimensions. Thanks for the book, but what other ways do you think I can look to .?

This long distance thing (two countries) is too much for someone with your wife's attitude. If you want your marriage to work you have to be close to her, giving her this kind of space even when you knew she had started flirting.... It's too much. Another country? Not even another state? Haba.

I suggest instead of asking if she has moved on online, you go back to visit your kids whom I assume you are missing. Have some fun/quality time with them. Make them the centre of your happiness and not your wife. Stop looking for what's wrong with your wife and how to fix her. Somehow you married this kind of antisocial woman for whatever reason, you'll have to manage her like that. Maybe she will improve in future, maybe she won't. But your joy will be in taking care of the kids and having a great relationship with them.

The counsellor that advised you to move to another COUNTRY is crazy in the head, doesn't matter how many degrees he has.

Jethrolite:
You de crase? You hear say warri men de take people wife abi too much kponyo water you de drink don knock your brain?

Area!
I maintain bros!
Na from experience I be dey talk bros, no change am for me abeg

kapelvej:
She has the kids, I am not even home , I work in a different country. She and the kids are in Norway, I work in malta

Ahhhhhhhhhhh

You work in different countries?!

Is she even nigerian?

How do you know someone hasn't already taken your place?

What led you d heck into doing a long distance relationship? For 6 years?!

It's not looking good at all.

steph2sweet:
Pls matured minds in the house, i need an advice. I just got the shock of my life today. I got to know that the man I am planning to spend the rest of my life with has a child out of wedlock. I heard this from someone close to his family and I confronted him about it. He said he is afraid to loose me, that was why he didn't tell me about it. That he doesn't have anything to do with the lady that gave birth to the child for him, and that the lady is already married. I am just short of words.

he doesn't have anything to do with the lady? Did his sperm take flight and enter her vargina through an open window while she was sleeping ?

His fear of 'loosing' you and thus hiding this information is understandable, many people won't be able to take this kind of news. Then again some people don't mind. Which of them are you?

kapelvej:
Never, I will never cal, I have done that over a hundred times . Never in this life

Who are the kids with, you or her?

Another way out would be to ignore her Completely. Go home, when she opens the door say hi to the kids, greet and play with them like they're the best things to ever happen to you. Give them a quick look over to make sure they are OK, then arrange your bags and leave back to your zone. You must do this without saying a single word to your wife (unless she starts to apologise). Make sure the kids are OK and jejerly carry yourself back to your base. If she starts to shout or raise a ruckus, IGNORE her completely and leave. Like others have stated, you have to make your position known to her that you've had enough of her sh1t. Let her realise you mean business this time.

I'm against divorce but if temporary separation will do some good then so be it.

You're thinking of calling the stalemate. You're thinking of calling her.

I sorry for you.

Na Warri man? He wants to abduct your wife and hold her as surety until you pay.


Suggestion :

Involve the police or a lawyer. Let them draft up a memorandum of understanding for both of you saying how much you are owing and how soon you will pay back. That should put to rest any dubious thing he has in mind and also make your hustle more serious in paying him back his money.

Suggestion:

You have been doing good business before, I assume you have a bank account. Take a soft loan from the bank and pay your friend back. You can now pay the bank back monthly.

Pick one.

Solve this matter quickly cos it seems your friend is getting desperate.

queensera:
Aljazeera finally releases the full documentary video of the brave boko haram huntress "Aisha Bakari Gombi".

Aisha Bakari Gombi is one of the few women who has joined the fight against one of the deadliest armed groups in Africa. With her shotgun slung over her shoulder, she ventures into the scrub of Borno, the northeastern province of Nigeria long plagued by Boko Haram attacks, hunting down their fighters.

Her bravery and keen hunting abilities have earned her the title of 'Queen Hunter'. Government troops are quick to call on Aisha for her skills but slow to reward her efforts financially.

While she is unable to liberate many more captives held by Boko Haram due to a lack of resources, she will never stop trying. Dive into the multiple worlds of Aisha, a commander, a hunter and a wife.

Watch The Video Below:


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SQDF7tIbhkw

Source:
http://www.nairaplus.com/2018/04/documentary-video-of-boko-haram.html


Cc Lalasticlala
Cc OAM4J,
Cc Mynd44

What a wonderful and interesting documentary. Watch it and weep for your country Nigerians!

sammydirectly:
It's either most of the people commenting on this thread are ignorant or chose to ignore the fact that his wife is circumcised.

Women who are circumcised rarely have libido. Op, that's the plain truth and the only problem I see. It is the acknowledgement of this fact and how you handle it henceforth that will matter.

It is not her fault she was circumcised. So she needs your help and understanding. Calm down, take it easy and do more sensual and romantic stuffs than the actual knacking. You will need a lot of caressing and lubrication. Don't always demand for sax, let it just happen. Kitchen, bathroom, car, cinema, church toilet , park. Remember, She does not have the cl!toris and the labia to pad the the blokus' penetration.

Saying to a circumcised woman, you wanna have sax, is like saying... Oya, let me perform surgery on you.

Educate her too so that she can help herself too. She can do hand job, and other stuff to spice things up.

It happens to women, circumcised or not.

You forget op mentioned that the sex was good premarriage and even a year into the marriage.
Most married women have a sudden drop in libido soon after their first child. I can't remember why right now. Drives men crazy though.

And no, helping with the chores doesn't work(though IRS always nice to help the wife out from time to time) The woman has to make a conscious decision to have sex with her husband to calm him down until her libido returns.

@robk,
Op her libido will return but the time for the return varieds from woman to woman. From as soon as a month to as far as a year after her last childbirth. You can google it up and read more about it. Na one of the wahala of marriage be dat. Kpele.

yettymuse:
She is CIRCUMCISED!

Its common even with the uncircumsiced.

lalanice:
It happens...my cousin bought gift for her huby's side chic on her wedding, (she was leaving d country after the wedding) the man still talks to her on phone in my cousin's presence such disrespect and because she is not complaining he thinks she's OK with it.

You may not be ok with it, but your cousin obviously is. She bought a gift for the girl. Her husband calls the girl and she doesn't complain. That is the very definition of 'Ok with it".

This is actually not that uncommon. Really there are ladies that don't mind as long as the man provides their needs and is responsible in the house. I know of one in particular.

Truth is, not every woman is against polygamy. Not every polygamous home is filled with fight.

I remember one alhaja who did something like this for her husband. Found out where his side chick of many years was living, went to the chicks house, and convinced her to be a second wife instead of all the sneaking around. It worked out perfectly.

Nigerianblogs:
More

Look at this picture very well. Look at the love in her eyes. She adores him completely

Mistake again on the front page.

Amidst tears not Aimed tears.

This is becoming a habit.

Soon it will become the norm.

Recycled old story.

Adebayo4christ:
Thank you very much ma for Ur advice. More of the reason I don't pray with her again is cos of her attitude,I have told her about it that how does she expect God to answer her prayers but she said God sees her heart. I have checked myself , though nobody is perfect but I don't think I have done anything to deserve what am going thru.
Now, something happened overnight, she told me on Thursday that we should fast on Friday and then have an hour vigil overnight which I accede to just to save my marriage. I came back from office around 9pm , was expecting a warm welcomed, the first thing she said was where have I been since an hour ago that I told her am in ketu, I told her the traffic from ketu to ikorodu was heavy. The next question was, is the cloth u wore to d office? Since then,she changed, she served my food separately gain. I ate cos I haven't eating since morning, now, around 11pm while I was snoring ahead d vigil, she woke me up with a tap, oga , its time for vigil, d next thing I said was, woman , y r u so agressive. A gentle tap could have been better. That was how wahala started o. She burst out of s room . Called her back , I was burning within .me but I cautioned myself. Told her to lead ,she said no, we should go n sleep. At d end, we had d vigil.
This morning, na force she take Greet me n asked wat will we eat. Told her bread n tea.meanwhile i plan going to sewy dad cos, I haven't seen him since last Saturday. Suddenly, my mum's call came in that my dad was shivering and about to be taking to d hospital. I ran to change my cloth n left, my wife didn't even say, let me follow u, the only question she asked was kilose daddy. ,I said he is being rushed to d hospital. That was all . She didn't follow me o.
I have shimarry

Mr. Man, stop cautioning yourself. Your wife is yet to see you explode. Explode! She thinks you're a walkover, probably you're the quiet type, not wanting wahala. Bros for the sake of your marriage long term you better bring the wahala oh! You're the one adapting to her, it's about time she adapts to you!

Guy Pls put warning: graphic pics!

jaszplus12:
well u all know well that some women love to be traumatized before they submit...therefore OP here's a suggestion:
calmly collect a week's amount of clothing and leave home to an unknown destination (come to my house so we share life's experience)
leave here in the dark and no communication
be sure your dad is catered for but don't info them your whereabouts.
after a week reappear ...collect another batch of clothes and calmly move out...don't answer any questions or look perturbed...
let's discuss again after this works or doesn't... cheers.

Supported. Nothing more to add.

Every marriage has its own wahala that one partner is always doing. I guess this is yours.

Who wants to move, her or you? If she's not too interested in moving then she won't feel it if you eventually don't pay the N800k. I would suggest you wait for another opportunity to teach her a lesson. In the meantime pay for the rent. One day her oversabi will trap her.

happy200:
I confronted the kids who are 12, 17, 13 years e.t.c younger than me. i was so surprise in our discussion they said '' we can't respect you cos sir said we shouldn't respect you, that we are here to serve him and not you''. since then i'm in heavy shock, pain and trauma that i even wanted to move out of the house but i cant afford to leave this case. Please guys encourage me cos only ur encouragement and God can see me through all these. Thanks

Be encouraged!

You're staying in that house because you have a goal in mind. Focus on that goal! Keep your eye on the ball and take this humiliating period as your desert phase. As long as they are not physically harming you, you're OK. When you finally succeed in getting your millions you will remember these days and laugh over it.

Cheer up bro!

Like someone else has said.
If I'm inviting a girl over from another town e.g PH, I send money for transport to and fro and then add a little change on top. Nothing much but just enough to ease her stress. Do this one or twice and the next time she won't ask for t-fare before showing up.

I don't know what other guys think about it though.

Honestly though I don't see this conversation as too serious. The girl really likes your bro but she's using style to tel him to step up a bit. I'm assuming the N1k he gives her is a joke and just her way of teasing him to loosen his hand small.

marvin906:
dude for someone to call a chick to come to another state
dont you think everything is already in place
to make her comfortable

Dude I've seen here in this forum on a thread where a guy invited a girl over meanwhile Na face-me-i-face-you e dey stay and he didn't offer her any transport. It's just basic courtesy bro. She just needs assurance or dem dey quarrel be4?

marvin906:
the chick is naturally materialistic
and this chick hasnt even sent 100 naira card to my lil one willingly..
and the otondo is working
and the two werey have been dating for a year plus

You're waiting for the girl to send your bro recharge card?





Another man go soon collect am if dem neva collect am already

marvin906:
dude this chick coming to warri is set
hotel accommodation is set
feeding is set
shopping is set
when you wan come warri turn into this
not that my lil one told her the amount hes gonna send to her for transport
benin to warri is how much 800

what do you mean by something is set?

Is she aware things are set?

Haba na, d discussion is straightforward, if he wants her to come he should assure her that he will take care of things most especially financial wise. If he can't take care of her now is it when (if) they get married he will take care of her?

Your bros no try Abeg. No vex.

SirToby:
Thanks brother.
i will act accordingly.
sincerely appreciate.
i need your prayers also.
Thanks.

Don't joke with vows. Don't make vows you cannot keep. Even Jesus tells us no to swear. Keep away from the vowing stuff.

UDUJ:
SirToby please don’t bring religion into this. God is not punishing you for any activity you feel you did

You suffer from Anxiety. Anxiety is a mental health disorder and affects over 60% of Nigerians but because of the way our society is designed we decide not to treat it cause of the supposed stigma attached to such. When people think of anxiety, they think of worrying and stress. They think of fears and a feeling as though something is going to go wrong. Anxiety is seen in thoughts and actions.

But anxiety has a tremendous physical component, and one of the key contributors to those physical sensations is long term stress. This Stress has a tremendous impact on your health, and one of the most common conditions is feeling ill.


The stress from anxiety can cause feelings of very genuine sickness. These feelings often mimic the way illnesses make you feel. Your stomach can feel like it's rumbling and you may even feel like you are having fever or malaria. Feeling sick may be a sign that you've fallen ill, but it can also be a clear sign of anxiety.

When we are stressed and the stress is a prolonged one (e.g. grief), it is physically very hard on the body to maintain this stress response for a prolonged period, so we have to find ways to take our body out of this stress response. Some of these ways are spending time with friends, counselling, medication, mindfulness, making sure we eat and sleep enough, massage, hypnosis etc. There are lots of different things that can help.

Anxiety can weaken your immune system, increasing the risk of suffering from mild illness.

Feeling ill is something that often causes concern. Some people feel so sick that they vomit or experience profound nausea that keeps them away from their activities. Some people experience more than just nausea as well. They may experience other symptoms that are similar to catching a fever, malaria or flu. They may feel like their organss are swollen, or their tongue is dry. They may feel lightheaded. They may even cough or experience severe stomach discomfort, like indigestion.

When anxiety is causing these symptoms, they're not dangerous. Anxiety is simply your body's misfiring of the body's natural fight or flight response, and the way your body reacts is designed to make sure that you know you're supposed to be fearful.
The problem isn't the signals themselves, the problem is that you're experiencing them all the time, often when it is inconvenient. People feel these symptoms for different reasons:

Situational anxiety is actually natural. It's inconvenient, but it's natural. Back in school, if you felt severe illness before a big test, it's because you genuinely feared that test. While tests shouldn't provide that fear, the reaction is not unexpected.

But on the other hand, the one you should fear and what I think you have is Feelings of chronic illness from anxiety which is even more problematic, because when your anxiety won't go away, the feeling of being ill won't go away either. It becomes something that makes you feel worse about your health, saps your energy, and can ruin each and every day (all symptoms you are feeling now).

My recommendation: go to the clinic and see a trained therapist. He will prescribe some good anti-depressants. You will be okay.

beautiful write-up! But then you ended it with antidepressants instead of anxiolytics

Imagine being forced to eat part of your own prick! Anyamaaaa!!!

You notice how adult diapers have become more readily available in supermarkets?

This is the cause.

Lalasticlala what do you think