₦airaland Forum

Mumben:
The pregnancy most likely belongs to ur husband to be, but truth be told you no try at all Sha.

it's not oooooo

HUSBAND SCARCITY!!!

"Husband Scarcity" has become one of the challenges faced by many young girls today. If you go to prayer houses, majority of the intentions are prayer for a life partner. And this calls for concern.
Casting our minds back to the time of our mothers and grandmothers, was there really much of a "Husband Scarcity" problem? Or, maybe there were more men than women then, or there was an adequate corresponding numbers of both genders. I don't think so. Maybe then, the women had values and were prepared to build a
home and not park into a built home. Then, once a young man comes of age and can at least feed himself and his wife, he goes out in search of a wife and the woman really appreciates him and helps him to build a future. What am I really trying to say? We created what we now see as "Husband Scarcity" for ourselves.

Today, the reverse is the case. Ask an average girl to define her dream husband; you get things like "he has to be tall, handsome, fair, and rich, own a house at least, and be presentable" and then she adds "God fearing" in order not to sound so worldly. Then, check the number of girls around you and the number of men that meet that standard, and you will see the problem. You hear girls say, "I cannot suffer in my father's house and then go and start suffering with a man." What a wonderful dream! What if from the beginning, you have everything you want and there is no suffering, and later in the marriage, the table turns around, then comes suffering? Will you run away? No one prays for suffering, but it is good to start small and end big, than start big and end small.

The problem is that the description majority of girls give of their ideal man is virtually the same. When 50 girls want the same kind of man and the man that fits what they want is just 1 man, and the man can only pick one. Then, what becomes of 49 others? They simply startt lamenting of "Husband Scarcity".
Another irony of our time is that it is hard, due to the face of our economy to find a man who is of marriage age who possesses all those things these ladies want, legally (except those involved in Internet fraud); even the number of those in Internet fraud is not enough to match all those searching for already made husbands. If you look around, majority of the ladies of substance, of good value and virtue, who are ready to build a home with a man who has prospects, are married and not complaining of husband scarcity.

The easiest way to find a husband now, is to change your view of who a husband is. A husband is that man God made and then saw that it may be hard for him to really actualize his purpose for making him, without a help mate and then made the woman and gave to him, and he felt complete and fulfilled. MARRIAGE IS NOT A POVERTY ALLEVIATION PROGRAM. It is a mission of building the family of God here on earth.

For those who see marriage as a way out of poverty, it is a way into bondage. Women are HOME BUILDERS, not HOME WARMERS... DON'T CONFUSE A MAN'S PATH WITH HIS DESTINY. Where he is today, may only be a route to where God has destined him to be tomorrow. Another truth is that YOU MAY BE THE ONLY FAST MEANS TO THAT HIS DESTINATION. Join in alleviating "husband scarcity". PICK UP THE RIGHT VALUES. I am not saying that you should pick anyone that comes your way and talks of marriage, not all men are husband materials. What I am saying is that you should stop setting your standard on material acquisitions or
physical appearances.

Look beyond the physical. WHAT MAKES A MAN WHO HE IS, IS NOT WHAT HE OWNS OR HOW HE LOOKS, IT IS WHAT HE IS MADE UP OF. And that which he is made of is, most times, not seen with the physical eyes, only its effects can be seen. Marriage is a permanent thing. Whatever is seen is temporal and that which is not seen is permanent.

Relax and go to God. God did not just make Eve for making sake; He made her for Adam's need to be met. May God help us. Good afternoon

JustforMen:
Domestic Violence is totally evil and inexcusably bad. It has no place in civilized human society.

Now, what is domestic Violence?

What does it mean?

What are the forms it takes?

Questions begging for answers

Ladies& Gentlemen!!!!!!
What is the first thing you will check the first time you'll visit your partner?
Me: Kitchen, bathroom and bedroom

TheWolfen:
And u think online the best place to get a mate?
Think again

Let him try

RoyalBlu:
*Living within your means helps a great deal in WHEREVER you find yourself.

True but most Nigerians don't know that abroad you pay bills like kilode

Kobojunkie:
Oh, she eventually left? That is good to know.

I don't agree that children born in the midst of abuse grow up to become abusers themselves. Instead, children who are not well trained do.

Research Institute of human psychology has done research in over 80 countries about the bolded and the advise that victims of domestic violence shouldn't give birth because it will be a continuous circle. There are about 8 cases of domestic abuse at Panti all the abuser mother told us that they were abused by their sons father

In January 2019, Omotola Jalade shared on her IG that she was grateful that at 40, her last child is already in the University. Remember, she has four kids and she married quite early.

Funke Akindele (Jenifa) congratulated her on the post. Funke is 41, and just had her first babies in December of that same year.

Now, if you try to compare these two women, you'd fail at it because they are both accomplished. Will you say Funke is unfortunate for just having her first babies at 41 while Omotola's last child is already in the University?

My point here?
Stop comparing yourself with others! Your life journey isn't the same with anyone, irrespective of societal expectations.

Not everyone will get married in their twenties, not every couple will have a baby nine months into marriage, not everyone will become a millionaire in their thirties. Some people will get their dream jobs at 40, it doesn't mean they've failed. Some will become CEOs at 55.

Please, learn to focus on your life. I know it's a difficult thing to do in this era of social media where everyone seems to be doing well in life except you. Don't compare your life journey with others, not even your classmates or siblings.

There are only CLASSMATES, there are no LIFEMATES. You're your only mate in life.

Whenever you're tempted to compare yourself with others (which makes you to feel pressured and sad), come back to this post and digest every word...
Good afternoon fam❣

Foodqueen:
That's cool. But be careful of the journey you are about to start o ....

Why? Explain

Kobojunkie:
I said it before...women need to start having these serious conversations amongst themselves.

Unfortunately we wouldn't. A friend married an abuser, all the red flags were there for all to see(smoker, drinker and womaniser) but she went ahead to marry him, she has broken ribs, hospitalized countless time, STD's and in the end the last beating was what made her leave.

Women in abusive marriage please � don't give birth because you are only producing an abuser. Go to the hospital and insert it in your vaginal

Jbn11:
Who will help me with fund to start my business?

I will remain loyal and respecful.
Am losing hope my dream is dying down

Ask your pastor neighbors colleagues at work and siblings

Domestic Violence Is An Accepted Nigerian Epidemic
Domestic violence is a funny problem because everyone online fights against it and indoors dey practice it

Domestic violence is not an issue of today its something that is done regularly in our society and its often commonly overlooked , there is no Nigerian that hasn't seen a man beating his wife , from neighbors to friends even movies show it, its a common thing here, when kids or young boys see men beating their wives they accept that its the way to handle issues , the fact the social media has made it possible for people to reach out Doesn't mean that it will stop , its normal to nigerians so stop hoping for any change , instead be observant

The problem is the women not the men b4 u eat me raw hear me out

Antelope when know wetin lion be has no business staying in the same house with it - jude 2017

If a woman is dating a man , it only takes one incident for her to know that he is a violent person , maybe one day she annoys him and he insults her or slaps her a normal woman with brain in her head will run away from that relationship no matter how hard the guy begs but when this happens to most women they will stay because of love or they are desperate for marriage if he is rich , they will be hoping that he will change over time. When you marry a man that has slapped u b4 or is quick to insult u , expecting marriage to change him is desperation my sister

If u know that ur man is hot tempered and you're desperate or u love him them learn to handle him , dont talk back at him when he is angry , become a sheep after all you're the desperate person , if ur brain they work u learn to live with it

When u see news or stories of a man beating a woman , don't be deceived the man didn't just beat her for the first time that day , he has been doing it for a very very long time , na that day own u hear

Most women will talk bad about it but when it happens to them they are quiet , the common nigerian thing of no be my matter people go hear

Conclusion; Nigerian society encourages it , even our leaders beat their wives , ebonyi state governor , if a random man beats his wife and he is arrested , he wouldn’t be convicted because even if its a crime they dont see it as one , police will tell him to calm down and na woman she be , in short they will call the beaten wife and advice her to learn to respect her husband

This is us , its the way we are , when we now see threads about it , guys that beat women will be shouting no its wrong as if they are any better , all na internet holiness


its simple my sisters

From you're mad to a slap to push to punch to beating to knife to strangle to I will kill you till he eventually kills you

The domestic violence thing isn't an individual problem its a Nigerian problem

if a man slaps u, insults u or gets angry easily dont marry him run as fast as ur legs can carry u

Are these things real?

I don't understand what you have written

bamideleoyin:
Hi am oyindamola by name
Stayed in ibadan
Am 24yr Old
Am a journalist and script writer by profession,i need a someone i can talk and rub minds with not a boring type.
I want a serious relationship.

You are a journalist and you write like this

Then why get married?

Wahala

How? That age is the prime age for the average Nigerian man

dxdiag:
She took in like 4 times but miscarried on those occassions, now nothing is even popping up again.
One of the tube got blocked, but one is still active.
Then this fibrods too, done surgery once but the fibrods re back again and we both don't want another operation again.
We ve seen specialist countless of time, used herbs,expensive drugs, spent money, prayed and all that.
Pressure from family member too is there, @times everythings seems not to make sense again.
I just ve to be strong, but am human.........am weak at times too

try eekfertllity on Instagram

dxdiag:
It will be well bro, you re not alone.
God will glorify himself in this situation.
Mine is 5years plus and we still believing God.
Its not easy i must say.

What's the issues?

Hormonal imbalance
Blocked tubes
Low sperm count
See a fertility specialist not a regular physician