₦airaland Forum

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As much as this is hilarious, there are some form of truth in them too.
Mike Hosking (@hoskingonzb) has outdone himself this time around...





Source: https://www.facebook.com/MikeHoskingBreakfast/posts/1008425705857657

So many laws flying around and no implementation mechanism.
So, what will this amount to if there are no implementation drives backing it up?

I won't comment until this makes FP, which I am sure it would get to in the next couple of hours.

Her brother and his bushy beards though.

blublahd:
Is the groom a military officer?

Yes o, Bona na army.

I will only encourage anybody to rock any of these hair style if they can tell me how they will sleep with this hair.

You brush both lips and it was only the lower lip that turned pink while the "igbo" residue on the upper lip refused to come off.
Uncle you can lie o. Uncle, I will recommend you go and represent Nigeria in the World Lying Championship.

www.nairaland.com/attachments/2683458_cymera20150729135804_jpeg055d39424c6014bb07a4d5998b2c893e

Is Paul Biya wearing a beret or is there a soldier standing behind him?

If there is someone behind him, then Bayo's timing is marvelous.
If there is nobody behind him, why is he wearing the beret on his ogo (back of his head)?

raumdeuter:
Can a 4yr old girl bath herself properly?

So since she cant dress up in front of you, that means You cant even bath a 4yr old

I think a man who thinks he cant bath a 4yr old needs serious help

Is there a reason I have a wife?
Even if my wife is not home to do that, at least, I can afford a house help.
You really need to get you mind out of the gutters.
If I want to run my home that way, I feel you should mind your own and do your thing your way (that is of you are married)
What I have expressed is my opinion, you should do same and mind your corner.

Phema:
What would make a man feel uncomfortable when his 5 year old daughter is being dressed up in his presence?

If that is not perversion, tell me what is.

Have you ever taught of it as trying to teach your child the right thing to do in the presence of some from the opposite sex (especially adults) from a tender age?
Just get the pervertive thought out of you mind and see it from another angle.

Phema:
Really? So you cannot dress your 5 year old daughter neither will you be in her room when she's being dressed?

Is your wife not also allowed to dress your 5 year old son or see him being dressed up?

Perverts everywhere! Mstchewww!

To each man his own.
Abeg, explain the co-relation between me deciding to give my child privacy and it being basis for being a pervert.
If you are not comfy with the idea, well thats what rocks your boat. That will still not stop me from raising "my" child the way I deem it fit.

Once my daughter clocks 4, I don't think I should be around her when she is getting dressed up and she should be told why. At that age, they are very impressionable and whatever they learn from then on will play a major role in their growing up.
So, OP, don't let your Dad's disposition towards you wanting privacy bother you at all, there is no question of you wanting (in fact, you should be demanding for your) privacy

Biko, does anybody have the recipe for those kra-kra buns we eat back in the days? I mean those ones the Ghana people used to fry in the late 80s and early 90s (those delicacies seem to have disappeared)
I'm seriously craving for it and I would love to have the recipe for me to try my hands on it.

TheRealAdonye:
Lessons:

This was my first time and if you've ever had a first time , you'll know it's hardly ever perfect.

1. Shake off excess flour after dipping it in the mix if not na Buns go surround your Chicken.
2. Beware of Salt. Adjust the recipe to what you have. 2 tablespoons of salt might be a bit too much depending on what you are working with.
3. Have enough oil. It's called deep frying for a reason.
4. Except you are absolutely sure that your hand is drier than the Sahara, please don't drop the Chicken in the Oil with your hand. Biko.
Also don't drop it from a distance, bring the Chicken as close as you can.
5. It can be tempting to remove the Chicken before time. Don't. Except you like pink insides with a hint of blood.
6. Keep the Chicken on a serviette for a while when its removed from the oil. Enough said.
7. Note to self: A Meat and Normal thermometer is a necessity.

This is the first try. I'm on the lookout for the rest of the spices. Anyone who knows where I can purchase them in PH should please let me know.


It's been a Pleasure.

Check SPAR, that's where my wife gets all her spices. Nice try.

Nigerians will not kill me. See some of the rib cracking comments that followed Punch's publication of the announcement online.

Weedkhalifa:
as you dey so you get am?

Maybe he thinks it is N2,400.00

emmatok:
But the same person ordered for the ATM after his death.
I believed he faked his death and bribed the police to keep quiet.

You know we don't do properly autopsy in Nigeria, so the Police can just present anybody as the design doctor.

Yeah, right. Faked his death, killed his friend and wounded his brother. So, he then designed his face on a cadaver and sent it home for us to bury, abi? Or what's your own angle about that?

lagmostkuit:
Strange acts..

Could it be that d man ain't dead!
*just wondering*

The guy is dead and buried. I have full details of the tragedy. My family was involved in the whole process cos he was supposed to get married to my cousin.
Leave him out of this charade, the bank is trying to cover their ass.

ogahlouiskid18:
nawa ooooo
which can lie be this
I would no longer believe this shit

It is very true, I can confirm the authenticity of this story.
The lady he was supposed to marry is my cousin, Celina Okor Uzo. We were all waiting for him to get to the village before we heard the sad story.
The poor girl is yet to get over the whole tragedy. But the part they said his ghost withdrew the money is a lie, the bank is not telling the truth. It is just crazy.

OP, I understand you perfectly well. That same reason was why I dumped them and chose to use Swift for internet services. Their CSAs at Saka Tinubu are always behaving as if you are trying to woo them; when you go there, smile and greet them, they put up this kind of 'wetin dey worry this one' kind of attitude that annoy me. If I were in your shoes and I heard them spew that trash, I'd have started the fight right there and then, God help anyone that talks back.

Answer this: Should a woman take a second husband if her husband is impotent?
The thing is that we misplace our priorities; wen the man was marrying the woman, did he tell her he was marrying her because of children? If they have that understanding, no wahala. If otherwise, haba, you promised to stay with her for better for worse. Not being able to bear children is one of the worse, deal with it.

If you do it with any boy/man, yes, you will get pregnant even if they use a condom.
But you do it with me, and you are sure that you are 18 years on that day especially when I drill you without a condom, I swear you will not be pregnant. Trust me, I know what I am talking about.

Yobo, get sense o. She's just looking for an excuse to call you a wife beater, divorce you and make away with half of everything you have ever played for. Yeye GD wife.

I can't believe I have accounts in 6 of those Banks, worked for one of them as an IT and Credit consultant and rejected their offer to stay on as a staff.

We never see light since Tuesday.

Charism, I have read through the 7 pages of this thread but I can't find your response to Eden1747's questions.
Patiently waiting.

Eden1747:
This is totally a lie. If indeed you were at the bank, what was I putting on?, what did Mr Soetan who was in the cubicle with him say to calm me down?, you're most probably an ecobank staff but I seriously doubt that you're in badagry. Another eyewitness on the front page saw everything. I'm well known at ECOBANK badagry, it used to be my working account when they were Oceanic, so why would I walk in with an attitude? There was no queue. The office assistant took some files to him and scurried away. I was coming from jumat service and someone in the cubicle was asking which mosque I worshipped at. He wasn't attending to anyone. Do you think I enjoy telling the world that someone called me a goat? And since you claim you were there for your BVN, the CSM's cubicle is not where customers were for verification. All liars go to hell biblically. In Islam, you'd be hung by your tongue with the fires of hell burning you. I hope you know that.

Maggi and the rest of them (Knorr, Royco etc) are all seasoning cubes. So, if you have too much of it in you food, the beat way to say it is "The seasoning in this food is too much"

BIS/Data
Telenovela
Powder (I for say make-up)