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Crime › Re: NDLEA Statement Shows Abba Kyari Is Still Active In IRT Despite Suspension by Shokoloko(f): 9:12pm On Feb 14, 2022

tesppidd:
You don't even understand what we are talking about.

I do. Thank you

Crime › Re: NDLEA Statement Shows Abba Kyari Is Still Active In IRT Despite Suspension by Shokoloko(f): 6:52pm On Feb 14, 2022

tesppidd:
And if he does time for the drugs case in Nigeria the US would still require his extradiction even if it is 30 years from now.

You think the Nigerian government doesn't know this?

This government is not thinking of 30 years.
They just don't want him extradited during their tenure.

1 Like

Crime › Re: NDLEA Statement Shows Abba Kyari Is Still Active In IRT Despite Suspension by Shokoloko(f): 6:51pm On Feb 14, 2022

emmyN:
The allegations do not really make sense. Kyari, a high ranking police officer would not be negotiating with a puppet on a drug deal worth millions, rather he would be talking to the person that calls the shot in the department. Also, he wouldn't pick a random person to make the deal with. If he was a drug baron, he didn't just start today and should have contacts of moles in the NDLEA that aid them in their trade. Unless the person that was involved in this so-called sting operation has been bursted earlier and is being used to expose others in their network. If this was not the case, then this Kyari drug story is bullocks.

I also believe its false. They are making something up so that the FG doesn't have to extradite him. He will be "prosecuted" here in Nigeria and the case will go on forever.

1 Like

Romance › Re: I Have Feelings For My House Help. by Shokoloko(f): 10:27pm On Feb 12, 2022

Nedangel:
So this girl ( 15 years) was brought to my house by my wife after my wife gave birth a year after. My wife said she really needs someone to help her, but I kicked against it. After much pestering from my wife, I agreed.
I sooo much have feelings for this girl.
I have fought it so much. Some times my wife is out/ travels and am alone with her and kid when am back from work. But this strong feeling comes up and I feel like having her. Most times I find my self thinking about this girl. It's to the point that my chest pains me.. When I ask my wife for s*x, Most times & always she says she's tired.
Please it's really affecting me, it's eating me up. I need suggestions/ advice from my well meaning Nairalanders. Thanks allot.

She is a child.
What you are thinking is only for pedophiles, so stop.
Send her away. NOW

I hope your newborn is not female.

4 Likes 1 Share

Crime › Re: Iranian Man Carries His Wife’s Head After ‘Honor Killing’ by Shokoloko(f): 5:36pm On Feb 10, 2022

techWriter3:
I dont care about that! The absurdity of the "crime" is what irritates me.

I also care that the media is somehow trying to put some responsibility on the poor girl by making it seem that she returned. Its also an indirect message to others who may want to escape that its so tough out there you will want to return.

15 Likes

Romance › Re: I Really Don't Know What To Do. Please Help A Sister. by Shokoloko(f): 3:22pm On Feb 10, 2022

Jennyclay:
Good afternoon nairalanders and Happy new year to everyone. I promise to be brief.

My fiance and I hv been dating for 2 years. He's doing well for himself, he's humble, he's quick to apologize even when you're at fault. He calls his mom and siblings regularly, but he don't talk to his Dad. If I ask, he would say forget about him

My fiance has been keeping malice with his father for 3 years now. I don't know what transpired between them because he would never tell me. He act like his father doesn't exist.

His mom and I do talk on phone once in a while. Yesterday I called her to wish her happy new year, we spoke well and she prayed for me. Abt 10 mins later she called back, but this time she was crying, She explained how his son has not been talking to his Father, she said this year 2022 would make it 3 years, she said they have called elders and pastors to talk to him but all to no avail. She said It would be her greatest joy if I also help her talk to him since he loves me so much. We were on the phone for over 45min.

Nairalanders, he's coming to seek my hand in marriage by March but I'm scared and here are my reasons. 1) His he pretending to be nice to me 2) what if we have little misunderstanding when we get married will he forgive me or keep malice with me for years

I was so angry at him, I told him that I'm giving him now till month end to reconcile every conflict or dispute he has with his father else I'm calling our relationship a quit, because this character seems to be a redflag to me. He started begging me, he said I don't understand yet he's not telling me anything.

I'm really confused. Please help a sister.

1. He has to tell you why. Anything less than sexual molestation or attempt to murder for rituals is not enough to keep malice for 3 years.

2. The malice will reach your side as well. He has perfected the art. Get ready

3. The malice will reach your kids too

4. Thank you

2 Likes

Crime › Re: Iranian Man Carries His Wife’s Head After ‘Honor Killing’ by Shokoloko(f): 3:13pm On Feb 10, 2022

techWriter3:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=k01r8LURtok

https://nypost.com/2022/02/08/iranian-man-carries-wifes-head-after-honor-killing/
https://www.cnn.com/2022/02/09/middleeast/iran-teenage-wife-beheaded-intl/index.html

The you-tube video says the girl was traced to Turkey and brought back to Iran against her will

I don't know why the news is reporting that she retuned of her own volition

38 Likes 2 Shares

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 3:41am On Feb 09, 2022

Steep:
Older women are to teach younger women not the whole church.

Its not said who they are to teach. Lets not add

1Tim 2 talks about marriage. You are free to pretend it does not, but know this you have no authority over any woman that is not your wife.
If you have no authority over any woman that is not your wife, then she cannot usurp authority from a man who never had authority over her in the first place.

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 12:23am On Feb 09, 2022

Steep:
Christian assembly is not a cultural/political assembly, why will you say Paul is telling Corinthian Christians to obey cultural or political law?

Note Paul was instructing Timothy on the qualification of pastors, deacons etc

1 Timothy 2:11 Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.

2:12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

The woman should not teach nor usurp authority over a man.
Meaning the authority to teach and lead primarily is a male one which a woman should not take for herself.

Mind you this admonition is for church gathering not private interactions.

"Except there is not a qualified male" is just my opinion which is borne out of the word usurp.
Meaning if there is a qualified man then the mantle fall on the man not the woman.

Titus 2:3-5
The older women will
1; Teach what is good and after teaching what is good
2: Urge younger women to love husbands and children.

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 12:11am On Feb 09, 2022*

Steep:
Christian assembly is not a cultural/political assembly, why will you say Paul is telling Corinthian Christians to obey cultural or political law?

Note Paul was instructing Timothy on the qualification of pastors, deacons etc

1 Timothy 2:11 Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection.

2:12 But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence.

The woman should not teach nor usurp authority over a man.
Meaning the authority to teach and lead primarily is a male one which a woman should not take for herself.

Mind you this admonition is for church gathering not private interactions.

"Except there is not a qualified male" is just my opinion which is borne out of the word usurp.
Meaning if there is a qualified man then the mantle fall on the man not the woman.

So take out the qualified part. meaning if there is no man to teach a congregation, there should be no church service that day?

Take a look at the scripture you gave. A lot lot of words there show that this is a scripture between a man and his wife.
But a suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man. the word "the" is a particular man (her husband)
You do not have authority over another man's wife so there is not way Paul will advise another man's wife not to usurp your authority.
You do not have authority over the daughter of another man until you marry her, there is not way Paul will advise another man's daughter not to usurp your authority .You both are not even related
So that the reader is not confused Paul gives example with a married couple in the next verse.
Paul goes on to talk about child-bearing which is a result of a marriage.
So clearly Paul is not talking about church here but about the marriage.
And yes I agree that women should listen to their husbands and not usurp authority over the man.
And here Paul was inspired of God but he clearly stated that he was the one who was not permitting women to speak, he said it. Probably James or Peter may have been allowing women to speak and Paul say "Not I". That scripture is still inspired of God but that is Paul saying "I want it this way..."
Go to 1 Cor 7:10, you'll see Paul say "Not I, but the Lord says this ......" "Not the Lord, but I say this...." All scripture is inspired of God, however Paul is letting us know before hand that this is his decision

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 11:03pm On Feb 08, 2022

Steep:
What assertions?

you are wrong, there was no where Paul instruct any Christian church to follow the cultural/political law in Christian assembly. Taxes are paid externally to world government not a rule in the church. This is the scripture I found for this Matthew 22:21 Then he said to them, “Therefore render to Caesar the things that are Caesar’s, and to God the things that are God’s.” Jesus wants his disciples to pay political taxes

Please give scripture for this: But a woman is not to take leadership role except probably there is not a qualified man.

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 10:42pm On Feb 08, 2022

Steep:
you are wrong, there was no where Paul instruct any Christian church to follow the cultural/political law in Christian assembly. Taxes are paid externally to world government not a rule in the church.

Please let me have scriptures for all your assertions. We are here to learn.

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 3:32pm On Feb 08, 2022*

Richy4:
@ bold.. You are simply missing the point... and I am not going to deviate from the reason why I called you up which was leadership... I am not here really to answer mischievous questions that has not bases...

<<< just Incase you have forgotten the reason why I was engaging u, U said ..."No true believer should limit his walk with God by marrying a second wife. But if one has already married a second wife and became a believer then he can maintain the wives equally but he is barred from leadership roles.

Then I asked if Abraham and David that married more than one wife if they were not leaders.... and the people they lead were they not the people of God?... That was our argument right?... now u are asking me to prove if Abraham and David were Christians ....

You were implying that the God they served was different from the God of Christians...The Israelites that the bible referred to as the people of God, they were not of the same class as the present Christians because the mandate of their leadership was not directed and inspired by the holy spirit right?, The Christians leadership is better because it was mandated by Paul and should hence No need to make reference of the old Testament correct

I will suggest u read the bible.... pause and think about how it was applicable in future as well as the past...That can help u a lot to understand.

We can debate without trying to be dismissive. I am quoting scripture so I am surprised (or maybe I should not be surprised) that you who is NOT quoting scripture is calling the word of God mischievous and without basis

You have not quoted ONE SINGLE verse of scripture. Which scripture d you want me to read, pause and think about?

Christians and Jews are totally different. While Jehovah is the same God, the covenant with the Jews is the old covenant (testament) and the covenant with gentiles is the New testament (covenant). God ended covenant with Israel Jeremiah 3:6-8 and said if she returns he would take her back if she repents Jeremiah 3: 11 -13.

The church is under the law of the Spirit of life in Christ Jesus
Jews are under the law of the Torah. Neither Abraham or David was a Christian. They were JEWS and they were NOT leaders IN CHURCH. The law of Christ is only for believers.

Two different religions, one God.

What part of 1st Timothy 3:2 do you find confusing
English Standard Version
Therefore an overseer must be above reproach, the husband of one wife, sober-minded, self-controlled, respectable, hospitable, able to teach

You need to quote scripture when you debate scripture.
The moment you say you have a problem with what Paul mandated then you negate this scripture: 1st Timothy 3: 16-17 16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: 17 That the man of God may be perfect, throughly furnished unto all good works

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 2:25pm On Feb 08, 2022*

Richy4:
There's a difference between preaching and go and tell... Mary was asked to go and tell the brethren that he is alive...Full stop...That was because Mary knew them (the brethren) ..
@ bold You said Paul was telling them to follow the Law of Corinth right? meaning that they should obey the law of the land... remember it was Paul also that wrote to Timothy right?

Now, Does the law in Nigeria permits People to marry more than one wife? Yes or No,...If yes, why do you think a polygamous man should not be a leader in the church...Considering the fact that the church in Corinth obeys their law by not letting women speak... shouldn't Christians abide by Nigerian law as well since the law permits more than one wife and allow any man who wishes to be a leader be instead of the segregation?

You touched a part that makes me believe that probably u don't understand the bible....How do you define a leader as a Christian...If Abraham and David were not leaders, I wonder who was .... If David did not lead the people of God, I don't know..( church signifies where people of God gather together not a building...The Israelites were also the people of God... and the got leaders)
or maybe you were implying that there are different God in Old and new testament?...If it was the same God, how did God allow some one with multiple wives to lead his people?

Don't U realize that Paul is just like u and I.. He was saying what he believed was right at that time... Some of it was in his own accord some were inspired by God..

We are all here to learn
1. In Nigeria there is separation of church and state. There is NO law in the constitution in Nigeria that dictates the type of person who should head a church/ church departments. Since there is no law of the land /constitution concerning the headship of a church/church departments in Nigeria, we are bound to the law of Christ/the church. In some countries you cannot build a church - as long as the state forbids it, as Christians no need to make a fracas, do your evangelism and stick to your house fellowships.

If there is No law in a land concerning an issue, use the law of Christ
If there is a law in the land negating the law of Christ, use the law of Christ eg some communities have laws about wife swapping. It negates the law of Christ.
If there is a law in the land that neither negates/ nor agrees with the law of Christ use the law of the land. If the tax states to pay tax (it neither negates/agrees with Christ) pay the tax. If you are in a place where tax is not paid, why would you pay tax?

2. Can you prove that Abraham and David were Christians? I can prove that they were not. Acts 11:26 And the disciples were called Christians first in Antioch.
Can you prove that Abraham and David were leaders IN CHURCH? I can prove that they were not. Acts 2:47, Acts 11:26 And the disciples were called Christians first in Antioch.

3. Explain 1st Tim 3:16 All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness:

4. Cambridge dictionary does not show a difference between "preach" and "go and tell" (see photo). Mary was asked to go get people to accept that Jesus had resurrected and was alive. Is that not the great commission? Acts 18:25-27 When Priscilla and Aquila heard him preaching boldly in the synagogue, they took him aside and explained the way of God even more accurately. Do you see Paul receiving correct ion in doctrine from a woman? Acts 18:25-27

I would like you to use bible verses for your points since we are discussing from the bible. I will also do the same.

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 1:04pm On Feb 08, 2022

Richy4:
@ Bold, Stop please..If someone decides to take a second wife, that's his choice..
David was the man after God's heart right? Did he marry only one wife?
Abraham walked with God... Did he marry only one wife?

In the new Testament: 1 Corinthians 14: 33-35, it stated and I quote
33.For God is not a God of disorder, but of peace—as in all the churches of the saints.
34 Women are to be silent in the churches. They are not permitted to speak, but must be in submission, as the law says.
35If they wish to inquire about something, they are to ask their own husbands at home; for it is dishonorable for a woman to speak in the church.

Does that mean women pastors were sinners? Are they going contrary to God's words? Why do you guys turn the Bible upside down?

! Corinth 14:34 .... as the law says. Which law? The law of the Land. Paul said the women should be quiet and follow the law of Corinth.
In Matt 28:5-8 and Luke 20:17 because there was no "law of Corinth" Jesus in Luke and an angel in Matt instruct Mary Magdalene (a woman) to go and teach and preach to the brethren.
Jesus/ The angels did not ask Mary Magdalene to look for a male figure to tell, who can then relay the resurrection message to his brethren. He asked her to go herself.
From this we see that Mary was the first human who got the message of the great commission.

Was Abraham a leader in church? Was David a leader in church? These men were JEWS and not Christians. What part of 1 Tim 3:2 do you find confusing? A man can take a second wife but he cannot be a leader/ overseer of anything in church.
If you have a different interpretation of 1st Timothy 3 explain it, so we can learn.
Please as believers we must accept the word as it is or walk away from Christianity. There is nothing to twist in the bible. God is not an author of confusion

1 Like

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 12:38pm On Feb 08, 2022

Idaytesj29:
I have seen church elders with more than one wife. Women who had children with more than one man are playing different roles in places if worship too.

The no of women you LEGALLY have should not in my opinion determine the strength of your faith in God.
Just saying

Nobody can change the bible. We are 2000 years too late. These churches are in gross disobedience to God.
As per faith in God - Imagine that one has so much faith in God and originally God called him to a teaching ministry, but because of second wife, you can never exercise the ministry God called you to as a child
1 Timothy 3:2 No elder should have more than one wife 1 Timothy 5:9 For a woman to be put in a church register for assistance, she must have been married only once, not twice.
The bible does not state that an unmarried man or woman with kids from several people must be treated like this. This is because marriage is a sacred covenant to God

[b]So those churches having elders with multiple husbands/ wives are committing grievous sin. A church or department in church is never to be headed by a person with multiple spouses.[/b]

You and I have no opinion here. We either follow the New testament as believers or we depart from the Christian faith.
The yoke of Christianity is very hard. Christianity is not an easy religion. A lot of people (perhaps including me) are on the wide path that leads to hell, and on that day many people will be confused saying "Lord, Lord..." and Jesus will say " Depart from me ...." Because we were living the Christian life according to our opinions and not what the bible says

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 12:14pm On Feb 08, 2022

Idaytesj29:
How Christians tries to deny this fact still amaze me. Thanks for telling it to them plainly. Also, coming from a woman. You have made my day.

This is why christians deny this fact. The bible says a man with more than one wife should not be a leader. 1 Timothy 3:2. Even a leader of a house fellowship should have one wife.
Why would a man want to know the Lord for 40 years and decide that because of "lust of the flesh"/ second wife you decide not to be a leader? At least departmental leader.
That is living below the plans God has for you.
No true believer should limit his walk with God by marrying a second wife. But if one has already married a second wife and became a believer then he can maintain the wives equally but he is barred from leadership roles.

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 1:29am On Feb 08, 2022

Lasunray01:
Good day nairalanders. My first time post in 5yrs.

Will try to summarize the issues and seek sincere advise please.

I’ve been married before but got divorced within a year due to genotype issues(it’s a long story). So I remarried 2yrs after and with a child now, and that’s where my issues started from.

I know I have some bad sides too which I’m trying to change, which is flirting with single ladies, and this has caused multiple fight with my wife.

Whenever we have this fights, not physical, just verbal, but in her anger she breaks virtually anything around, cups, laptop, speakers etc. she can be madly angry. I’ve warned, petted her severally to desist from this act especially infront of our kid...but she won’t. It’s getting worse by the day. Now she reports me with blackmail to her parents and friends making me feel I’m the worst husband in the universe, calling me unprintable names. Calling me weak cos I don’t beat.

Now the advice I seek, we are planning to relocate as a family abroad this year, but I’m really scared. I can actually go alone, but would prefer we all go together since I have the means. But I’m scared if I won’t regret my actions to take her along with this her character. What if I get jailed or lose custody of our child abroad, because she’s a master in blackmail. She can turn simple issue overboard.

Sorry for the long epistle. Just had to pour out my mind. Constructive criticism is welcomed.

Thank you

Desist from community flirting. A man without self-control has reduced respect and makes you the worst spouse in the universe.
It is not a simple issue like you claim.
Be guided. You are about to relocate to a country where she can make or mar you.

Family › Re: Please Advice! I’m Having Multiple Issues With My Marriage by Shokoloko(f): 1:25am On Feb 08, 2022*

Righteousness2:
The Permanent cure to Bad and Sinful habits is in JESUS Christ.

But I must tell you the truth! The woman you are living with now is not your wife.

Your original wife is the woman u said you Divorced because of Genotype.
Listen! Genotype is not a reason to Divorce. As long as you two got married, she is your wife. You need to go back to your wife. Except you did not marry her. If you two got married, then she is your wife and you need to rectify that.

GOD ALMIGHTY, the GOD of Chosen Has healed many couples and changed their Genotype.

From Sorrow to Joy Happening this weekend 12th and 13th February is another opportunity.

This advice is only for practising believers.
The OP has not declared that he is one.

Since OP has not declared to be a practicing believer not just a churchgoers the solution is that he stops chasing women.
Also he needs to know that eith the woman's current attitude she will walk out once they land in the new country.
Maybe that will be God's way of pointing OP back to first wife.
Please note that wife No 2 is also recognised by God as there is no where in the Bible where God expressed displeasure at the acquisition of a second wife as long as the man does not have an ambition for any kind of leadership position in church 1Timothy 3:2.

2 Likes

Programming › Re: My Journey To The Programming World - Newbie by Shokoloko(f): 2:03pm On Feb 07, 2022

Karmatyra:
I'm a lady and I just started my journey into programming too. I started this year,last month to be precise. Im still on HTML but hopefully I am praying the journey gets smoother for me. Thanks OP for this,it's really encouraging. I'll be following up on this thread and I also look forward to your updates

May God make your path easy.
You sound very level-headed.

Politics › Re: Defend Yourselves, 500 Northerners Killed Within A Month In 4 States — CNG by Shokoloko(f): 1:12pm On Feb 07, 2022

“In the last few days, armed bandits/terrorists across four northern states of Sokoto, Zamfara, Katsina and Niger States have killed scores of helpless and defenceless citizens in addition to multiple kidnappings and other forms of exploitations. Regrettably, these killings, abductions, maiming and exploitations have been going on incessantly with no respite in sight."

I
thought
IPOB
was
the
problem.

3 Likes

Romance › Re: My Fiancé Is Having An Affair With A Married Woman. by Shokoloko(f): 12:20pm On Feb 07, 2022

Curious346:
I just hope you're not cheating in your husband

No sir, I am not cheating IN my husband.
I am not a female member of your family so I am not predisposed to cheating IN or OUT or ON or OF my spouse.

Family › Re: Marry From Your Tribe: You Will Be Saved From Lots Of Headache by Shokoloko(f): 11:09pm On Feb 06, 2022

Simeon88:
I totally disagree with this, the most peaceful marriage in my family by my own observation is between my cousin from South south and a notherner from kaduna state.

I must agree with you. In my large extended family, a lot of the girls are married to Eastern European men and for some strange reason their marriages are much more peaceful than the ones where they married our tribe.
I always advise anyone who can stomach interracial marriage to try Eastern Europe.

Romance › Re: My Fiancé Is Having An Affair With A Married Woman. by Shokoloko(f): 10:58pm On Feb 06, 2022

Curious346:
are you the married woman dating a single guy?

You sound defensive

If I was being defensive I would ask her NOT to publicize the matter.

Come to think of it you did not accuse all the people who asked her NOT to publicize the photos of being defensive. These people should be yiur first suspects.

You decided to accuse the one person that said she would neither advise her to tag or not to tag.

Asking someone to take care of her safety first is not being defensive. It's being wise.
I am an elder and what an elder sees sitting down, a young person will not see standing up.

Romance › Re: My Fiancé Is Having An Affair With A Married Woman. by Shokoloko(f): 3:09pm On Feb 06, 2022

Mineralzz:
Hello everyone.
Am an active member on this forum, I've have my main account but I wish to remain anonymous, i just want to hide my identity and i will deactivate this account as soon as I get a solution. I'm so heartbroken right now

I thought my fiancée was different from every other guys, despite his gentle and innocent face I never knew he was a liar and a cheat

He's fond of connecting his laptop to his smart TV (65 inches). What displays on the laptop automatically displays on the smart TV screen. See what happened, he went downstairs to pickup something, So I wanted to see a movie on Netflix, while I was looking for a suitable movie to watch, a message popped up from Facebook and it stated "Whr are U? Check ur phone...6 missed calls "

At first, I wasn't triggered to open the msg but what drew my attention was the "cry emoji". When I opened the msg my heart melted, I was crying . Their secret affair has been going on since April last year. A married woman with 2 kids, I checked her profile I saw her kids and husband photos everywhere, she has visited my fiance at home several times, I saw lot of romantic messages.

I videoed their chat conversations as evidence, thank goodness his TV screen is wide enough for the blind to see. The moment he came inside he noticed my mood has changed, he was smart enough to know I opened his msg. He's started begging me, he said he can explain. Explain what?

Am on my way home now feeling devastated, heartbroken and sad . I plan to upload the video on Facebook and tag all the woman's friends until her husband sees it. I will also send the video to instablog, Linda ikeji.. Honestly I feel dejected and heartbroken. Help I don't know what to do .

Mynd44, seun, lalasticlala.

I cant tell you what to do but in case you decide to upload the video and tag her friends, go into hiding, make sure this woman has never met you before. Make sure she will not have access to your fiancé to get information about you or your siblings or parents.

I recently heard of a similar case where a young wife exposed a cheating woman (who was sleeping with her husband) and the cheating woman decided that since her home was lost, she would take the life of the young wife.

To cut the story short, the young wife escaped death, but her mother did not, and her younger brother lost an eye. The madam cheater relocated with her kids, but I have no idea where to.

So please make arrangements for your safety and the safety of your immediate family first.

103 Likes 7 Shares

Romance › Re: My Friend Is Dating My Younger Sister by Shokoloko(f): 2:51pm On Feb 06, 2022

I want to believe that you choose your friends carefully and that your friend is as decent as your are.

In that case, there should be no concern that your sister is in a relationship with someone who possesses the same decent character as her brother.

1 Like

Education › Re: 7 Signs Of Ultra Smart People Hiding Their Intelligence by Shokoloko(f): 12:26pm On Feb 05, 2022

If I could generalize, the most noticeable signs of Ultra Smart People hiding their intelligence include the following –

1) They pretend to be a novice on a subject matter.

You can be talking to them like a novice, explaining concepts and buttressing your points and facts until they give you a different insight about what you are talking about. From the insight, you would have known that they are probably more well versed in the subject than you are.

2) Good Problem Solvers

This is not just physics or mathematics problems, I am talking about everyday real life challenges. They will seek out feasible means to solve any difficulty without whining about it since complaining without doing never solved a problem.

In seeking out the best logical means to solve a challenge, they take the best course of action. If it doesn’t work, they try it differently from another perspective or angle or take it to someone who can until the problem is solved.

3) Discuss about ideas mostly or all of the time.

Small minds discuss about people, average minds are more vested in events, but the ultra smart are never likely to engage in any of that except to inquire the welfare of loved ones.

Every passing second is seen as fleeting and must not be arrogated to unprofitable intellectual or other human ventures.

4) Always in search of reasons as opposed to flimsy conclusions. This stems mostly from the fact that nothing just happens, there is always a reason behind things.

5) Can Easily Prioritize

Knowing what’s important is usually a difficult task for a lot of people, but not for the ultra smart.

Knowing the most important things is a Kickstarter embedded in their psyche. They dedicate a lot of time to research and introspection to figure what’s important so that they can be able to allocate their best resources to them – time.

They don’t lurk around impossible things or fixate on imaginary fantasies based on their own shortcomings. They can easily figure out the feasibility of things. When they can’t figure it out themselves, they go seek for people that can or that will point them in the right direction.

This is because, they also recognize their own shortcomings and don’t allow ego cloud their judgment.

6) They rarely disclose what they are good at to others. Invariably, they don’t showboat or boast of their abilities.

Therefore, to get a cue as to their mental awareness and intellect, you will have to be assimilated into their tight familial circle’s. Most of the time though, it’s usually hard except you have showed signs of similar inclinations yourself which is agreeable to their personality.

Refer to point 5 above.

7) Very optimistic set of people.

This means that they are always keeping an eye on the future in all their plans. Short term plans are always amenable to the long term future plan since they’re always positive and never pessimistic in their views.

Are you ultra smart?

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Family › Re: Why Too Many Broken Marriage? Any Way Around It? by Shokoloko(f): 2:50pm On Feb 01, 2022

lorenzos1:
From my observations, a lot of marriages fail due to a couple of reasons.

Dating and breaking up with multiple partners does not prepare you for marriage, it prepares you for divorce, cause you are now used to leaving when it doesn't work. Social media doesn't help, a lot of media personalities have been divorced

Truth

Family › Re: Why Too Many Broken Marriage? Any Way Around It? by Shokoloko(f): 2:34pm On Feb 01, 2022*

The number of broken marriages did not increase.

There have always been broken marriages. Couples staying together just because of society, living as roommates - separate bedrooms, minimal communication. Some as enemies under the same roof.

The only difference is that divorce is no longer a stigma and that is why its looking like more marriages are being broken.

How many women of our mothers go to visit their children and never return to their marital homes - that was their way of saying good bye to the marriage.

How many of our fathers moved to the village and left the mothers in the homes in the city - that was their way of saying good bye to the marriage.

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Family › Re: Help! My Wife Easily Quarrels And Keeps Malice With Me. by Shokoloko(f): 1:04pm On Jan 31, 2022

sageb:
Quite interesting
Are you in Woji/YKC axis?

No, I am not.

Family › Re: Help! My Wife Easily Quarrels And Keeps Malice With Me. by Shokoloko(f): 10:50am On Jan 31, 2022*

Philip94:
My newly wedded wife always capitalize on what I did and said wrong eventhough she does and says wrong things to me which I most times overlook.

On many occasions, she will start giving me attitude and will pick up quarrel with me for weeks. I have told her countless times to always address issues she has with me immediately before it turns to a big quarrel.

She wont listen but will rather keep malice with me at any little misunderstanding we have.

Please, how can I find a lasting solution to my wife's unending quarrel, malice and resentment? I am already getting tired of the whole thing ��.

Hi, I see so many people saying you should have seen the signs before getting into the marriage. Now while that is true, you have already tied and consummated the knot - you have to make it work.
My spouse WAS a master malice keeper and I solved it.
Most people keep malice to enjoy your reaction - asking them to talk and begging for attention
When she is sane let her know that her marriage is still young and she is already trying to bury it with malice. Let her know that going forward you will not be part of that game and you will go out with friends and enjoy yourself to give her time, as long as it takes
Next time she gives you the silent treatment, don't shout, don't warn, don't beg, don't react while she is in that state.
ENJOY yourself. Be happy. Call your friends on the phone and laugh. Go out. Read books. No need for feeding money until she is ready to discuss. Don't look miserable.

On the extreme, the last period, years ago that my spouse gave me the silent treatment, he had been keeping malice for a week: I was reading books, going to the gym, sleeping, enjoying myself. On the weekend, he barged angrily into our room, pacing up and down so I would notice him. I yawned and continued to press my phone and smile at the photos. Then he decided to talk and that was the end of malice.

Don't respond to malice. Stay away from the game and enjoy yourself until she is ready to talk

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