Prec1ous:


Parental pressure? Like she is some kind of robot. If they were poor I will understand but have you ever seen where a rich parent push their kids to marriage?

All the rich parents I know are more interested in having their children making their choices and getting the best education.

So, I do not agree with your reason. She should leave the man for good.

Your analysis.
I just submitted my own analysis based on what she wrote but it seem you want to poke holes where there is none.

Prec1ous:




Can both of you please tell me what was her reason for marrying him in the first place, seeing that she never loved him.

Please tell me? If you don't love a man, what other reason will push you to get married to him? Answer me!

Parental pressure 90% of the time. Especially if the parents are wealthy like in her case. You don't go against daddy and mommy or they will cut you off kinda situation. OP was born with a silver spoon so it is not about the man's money.

bendazum:


'Used to be the norm'?

Are you saying its no longer the procedure?

Not anymore because the major actors in the operating room are always in a hurry. The old-fashioned team of operators won't leave until everything is accounted for no matter how long it takes but the teams we have now believes that they are gods.
That's until our lawyers wakes up to do the needful.

True. Always got that mixed up.

cococandy:
Agreed. except that The Rhesus factor matters only if mom is rhesus negative.

But it’s funny how people take pregnancy and childbirth so lightly. Having a child can literally kill you.Ignorance is bliss though.

Once you learn in detail the physiological happenings occurring in the woman’s body as another person is in the process of being made inside of her, you just don’t look at pregnancy and child bearing as a simple thing.

1.5m with all the dangers associated with pregnancy and birth not to talk of C-section.

1.5 m for pregnancy induced conditions you will never know you have until you are pregnant.

1.5m for all the unforeseen labour and puerperal complications which may arise. Based on the fact that Nigerians cannot be trusted, once the baby is out and she develops complications, there is a 100% chance that the lady will be left to her fate as the baby's parents will prefer her dead so that she will not come back to forment trouble or milk them dry.
1.5m should in case in the process of birth, there is a need to remove the womb cos of complications?
1.5m, when she will continue to have C-section as medical experts do not advocate for vaginal birth after C-section. Do note that most surrogate pregnancies ends in C-section.

Are we talking artificial insemination or good old procreation method? 1.5m to be touched and prodded by God knows what.?
And what if the sperm is swimming around without a Rhesus factor thereby exposing the surrogate mother to a life time agony of dealing with rhesus isoimmunisation and incompatibility. A lifetime of not being able to have a child of her own


This is a poor business deal. Ladies donate their eggs for a price close to this amount talk more of the whole deal.
7.5m will be OK.
2.5m for the surrogacy and treatment of any unforeseen pregnancy related ailments.
2.5m to keep quiet and disappear.
2.5m to establish a business.

CrazyMan:

If I may ask whats your job as a wife?

Most conflicts in marriages today arise because most of you dumb females don't even know your role as a wife. You just want a husband that's all and have nothing to offer to him aside from spreading your legs for sex and popping out babies.

When a man spends 30days struggling to earn a living in order to give you a better life, you see it as his responsibility. He leaves the home very early and ensures that enough finance is made available for the home.

Then comes back exhausted and finishes his food and you expect him to clear the plates. If you can't keep him company while he eats and prefer to play the role of a restaurant waiter then you must play it to the fullest by clearing the table when he's done. That's your own responsibility.

Shut the fvck up dude.

When you marry someone half your age without any viable means of supporting themselves this is the kind of stuff you spit out. Also when you get yourself tied to women who only offer you sex you will be forced to reason this way.

I have realized that most men marry girls that they are way older than because they are searching for maids and sex trophy not wife. They look for beauty and girls that dish out sex at will without checking if they have anything upstairs and can support themselves.

They run away from girls with independent mindset, high intellectual acumen, women that has high reasoning abilities /intelligence and women that can support and bring more to the table than sex. Because they want to feel like gods.
Men who do this, do not wish to be challenged intellectually in their homes rather they prefer to wallow in their overinflated ego but when chips are down and their egos are wounded because their trophy wife is no longer massaging those blasted egos , they go about writing trash about women.

Wayward and careless parents.

anyicash:
Your wife is the only stranger in your family for she is not your blood..Do not trust her completely.

Same way a wife doesn't trust a husband at all. They are both strangers to themselves and their families. That's why they beat and kill themselves at will.
That said, how about marrying your sister or mom to keep the love in the family and keep the strangers out?

LIVINGICON:


As a female child who will be later married out to another man and will bear that man's name as well as his offsprings, she is as good as GONE. But for the dorminant and vibrant male child. He is HOME. He goes nowhere, he carries on as well as supersedes his father's legacy. Sorry to say this a male child= 3 female children.

Anybody can go and drink SNIPER.

Better not died before your father or your so called lineage or inheritance is also gone.

Tell that to Queen Victoria, Mary of Scot etc whose lineage has been on for generations.

Marriage to me is just a business contract with laid down rules, once it's not yielding profit or affecting me adversely, I quit.

I cannot tolerate deception from anybody most especially family. I will cut you off. I will forgive but will not forget. Most importantly, I will not train anybody's kids either.
I will not also maim anybody because I was deceived, I believe in the law of karma.

Thunderblasts:

When you get married, you can abandon your kids you hear?
It's safer to be irresponsible as a Dad than a mum.
Those kids will hate you beyond life as a mother when you abandon them.
You know why?
You as the woman should have been their last hope of survival. You carried them for 9 months and created a bond that shouldn't ever be broken.
They didn't suck their father's breasts looking into his eyes all day. They didn't bond that much with him.
Am talking from experience here via a relation.
Try it and see what those kids will do to you when you try coming back at old age.
The kids can forgive their Dad if he tries such but may never forgive their mum completely!

lol.

That's why there is a great difference. Mothers in good relationships, with stable jobs, sound state of minds and family supports doesn't abandon their children. Most women that do such are those that lack support from their families and friends, women with low self-esteem and confidence, who can no longer bear the societal scorn of being a single mom or married to deadbeat husbands.
The society dictates the rules and women are no longer willing to be pressured or blackmailed by societal dictations. Men cannot eat their cakes and have it. So also women. It is not supposed to be so.
People are feeling the heat and lambasting women for failing in their duties but nothing is being said about the men who chooses to be deadbeats dads waiting to reap where they did not sow in their old age. It takes two to tango. The game just started.

With the way men are clamouring for baby mamas nowadays, I expect this type of behavior of women to continue to rise.
Carrying a child for 9months doesn't mean a damn thing when you don't love or have feelings for the damn sperm donor. Or when you get abandoned during pregnancy trying to sort out your life.

victorian:









Trust me, you wouldnt want to know my past or even experience half of I went through as a married lady in the past . So don't judge because I'm single today. I know more than what u think u know in life.

I am so sorry. Didn't know you have been there. It is just that I am easily irritated when someone who hasn't had an experience of something dishes advice.

victorian:






Story! Tell that to the birds!

That does not justify the killing of men or pouring hot water on them.

It's pure evil!

Any woman who tries such with my bro, assuming he's alive. She will receive same hot water on her body, from the head down to her boob's and stomach!

I won't even spare her! She will wish she was never married to him in the first place. WTF! My dad married 5 wives! And none of his wives killed or disfigured his body! He lived long and well. Catered for everyone and every wives! Why kill or destroy men. If u can't take the heat, then don't marry!

Staying married is not byforce!

Then back to me, if my man cheats on me. Newsflash! I won't kill him, I won't disfigure him, and I will not fucvkin leave! Orelse my life and sanity is at stake in the marriage , that's when I will divorce!

You are so evil! God forbid!

No wonder you are rabid on this thread.
Look at this unmarried lady talking as if she understood what she is yapping about.

Cuties

Beautiful smiles that warms the heart.

They will be great

Deandean:

I'm sorry but u are very stupid...very very stupid...if u had said these b4 me,i definitely would av hit ur mouth...

Hit and rot in jail.

PureMind2:
Note taking him abroad was not really for treatment if it was that it could have been better but only to perfect there relocation stay over there now brought back the hussy to die here in Nigeria terrible humans every were

This is bullshits sir and you know it. Abroad hospitals are now God that their treatments are sacrosanct and infallible.
Stop clutching on straws to justify your despicable obsession to your brothers property. You are not even mourning your brother but what he left behind. Let the wife and kids mourn their father, Haba.

PureMind2:
If you know how the whole issue happen you will understand what trying to say the point is that no one is after the property of the husband more so the family also has access to the husband property if the family do not give birth to the husband how will he see him to marry now my point is the wife is a kind of Conny human my say is just that know the kind of woman you are going down with find out very well please it matters

Did you visit your brother when he was sick?

hakeemhakeem:
My takes on this is your family hardly contact your brother reason you dont knew when the sickness started and she felt since there was not brotherly relationship she and your brother friends took the responsible and they stood behinds her.allowed her to take charge of her husband properties and raise the kids her own ways. Nothing last forever
Moreover don't accused her for her husband death

Exactly. They didn't contact their brother or the family which made the wife to rely more on friends. He is not even ashame to mention it.
Or maybe they knew but waited for him to died. If not, how did he knew that the wife took him abroad for treatment?. Everything is wrong with this family

PureMind2:
The wife and the family have been in a distance talk no proper burial as the wife refuse to bring the children to there dad burial to pay last respect poison I can say yes because if someone is sick the wife still have the courage to take the hussy travel out without proper treat over there after fulfilling all aim return him back note the hussy is still sick she never take the courage to informed the closest person in the family what other thing is poison than these ?

She took him abroad for treatment But you said that she locked him up till he died.
You never visited your brother when he was sick to proffer solutions rather you waited till he died to ostracize the family he left behind. No wonder she is going about with security.
Embittered and entitled family enemies everywhere.

"""Her husband has started again ""
Red flag sir. A lot you are not saying. Waiting for the other side of the story

sassysure:

That is very insensitive of her.
I was shocked to the marrow.

A child she dont know his fate tomorrow?
A child that may open an unimaginable doors to her just because she used that child to do a selfless act.
We are Nigerian women and we know how we are.
Most of us that have kids unknowingly mock the rest who don't have any around us yet we pretend we sympathise with them.

That woman won't steal her child. Just an avenue to heal

If she dont know it, in hospitals, a woman who lost her child is allowed to go and stay with new born.
Why do doctors allow that?
Cos we are so self centered in this country, we sometimes behave worst than animals.

I lost a child once. Not my first but I was on constant supervision cos I nearly ran mad.
My friend parked all her family to my house and started going to work from my house.
When she came up with the idea, I was just nodding my head. She took over everything for like one month.
The day I screamed at one child for mistakenly pouring hot soup on his brother was the day she said I'm back and packed her family back to her house.
Let us show love.
This country is filled with artificial or eye service love that's why we are where we are today.

WHATTTTTTTT

I take God beg you to stick to what you know and do not mislead people.
What sort of psychotherapy is that?? Agonising desensitisation? Geezzz

Once a new woman gets in, I am getting myself a serial new men. I won't divorce either cos I am gonna lavish his money and properties on the new guys. Man will wish to his gods he never venture that far as there won't be only one.
Amma let go of my fantasies. . The era of chopping one egusi soup is over, yayi!!!!! Different sizes and shapes to test run.
I won't be left out neither will I be the first to start.

This my friend
That my friend

Shower her with dowry and she will come crawling back.

You kept someone's daughter in your house for years, producing and caring for your offsprings but you never for once man up to do the needful.

You are lucky she is not from my own neck of the wood or you will never see the kids again.

The surgery you had is

24kmagic:


I don't know what you mean by northern Nigeria been the way it is. I'm not from the core north, but l assure you where you come from is not in any way better than those core northern states you so hate.

About northern woman killing their husbands.... I will refer you to this thread. https://www.nairaland.com/5668508/wife-batters-husband-over-inability

She's an ibo woman, north a nothern woman. It won't be long before she kills that impotent boy.

This is to tell you that when it comes to domestic violence, It's not about where you come from, it's about the particular individual.

Finally, we have more successful marriages in where I come from far more than where you come from. You know why? Because we know the ethics of marriage.

We don't copy whites, we simply do us!

Successful marriages
Hilarious. You should've said you have a more potent cage system for your women

24kmagic:
All these things you wrote up there will only work in southern Nigeria. Come to central north and southern Kaduna and try this nonsense, your marriage will fold up before it even begins.

If you can't find a way to accommodate your husband's relatives for as long as they want to stay, I promise you, you will be a serial divorcee.
Because you'll keep having issues with husband relatives in whichever family you marry.

I don't know the kind of training they give girls in southern Nigeria but you dare not try it here.
I've always wanted to marry from south south or south east. But after joining nairaland two years ago and seeing relationship and marriage threads, I rather stick to our girls here.

I will marry an educated girl from here cos no matter how educated and exposed she is, she knows that "woman na woman.

One even said she doesn't like her brother in-law dipping hand in her pot of soup hahahaha. I mean, wtf is that? If I ever find myself in that situation (God forbid) and the girl confronts me, I will leave that house first thing the next morning, your husband sure knows what will follow after that.

9ja girls, all these your westernisation agenda will not thrive here. We are blacks and blacks shall we remain. Wonder why the west have high rate of divorce? Their idea about marriage and family is whack. The whites ought to learn about marriage from us cos they've been divorcing right from the days of Judas Iscariot. As long as you want to copy them, we'll keep on reading divorce stories on front page

If as a girl you are lucky to come from a family where your father and mother have been living/lived together for 35+ years, ask your mum how she did it.

Don't tell me times have changed.


Woman na woman.

Lastly, IT'S A MAN'S WORLD, WOMEN SHOULD LEARN HOW TO DEAL WITH IT

It is a man's world last century, can't say the same this present time even Nigeria is already caught up in the mass awareness and literacy towards gender rights. Just a matter of time.

No wonder Northern Nigerian is what it is, your beloved northern girls are already warming up with their knives.
Do anyhow and get dismembered into bits as they cannot take your bullshits anymore.

BRATISLAVA:


It's because they have the burden of two marriages, the real one then the "traditional" one. So they are confused on which to practice.

lol.

Two marriage ceremonies and triple families. I'd be confused too.

eni4real:
Is that a threat or something??
Nairaland can be outrageous...

It is what it is.
Do not dish out what you cannot take.

Oblongata:
You wear/wore dirty boxers or boxers you didn’t wash and decided to wear it again much later...

Get mycoten cream, use Azithromycin 500mg oral 1 tablets 2 times daily for 5 days

Use the mycoten cream lavishly.

If symptoms persist after 3 days consult your physician

The emboldened is very wrong. It can lead to severe adverse effect or toxicity.

eni4real:
Yes, you marry your wife and her family!!!
Absolute yes!!!

Who was quoting religious book??

I think you are the confused one here!!!

You should be self motivated!!!

i notice you added something sinister. Do not start or you won't like the expunge.

eni4real:
Yes, you marry your wife and her family!!!
Absolute yes!!!

Who was quoting religious book??

your hypocritical goons up there.


All this arguments are things that should be sorted out during courtship and to not accept what you cannot take.

eni4real:
You like Privacy too much!!

As a married woman, you can't stop your husband's family from visiting!!!

They will visit and you must appreciate that!!!

Being homely as a wife is beyond playing love in Tokyo with your husband alone...
In Africa, you marry your husband and his family and vice versa!!!

Do you also marry your wife and her family
Seem Africans are confused, indecisive and hypocritical in everything. One minute, you are quoting the religious books, next minutes you realised you are Africans
We are two-faced in everything, we practice leaving our father and mother to cleave to our spouse tag, and at the same time practices marry your spouse and their families. So evident that we are confused hypocrites.