₦airaland Forum

sanb: @op; let me give an answer from a different angle; cos it's different strokes for different folks....here we go;

I guess it really is different strokes for different folks , at least for most girls.

sanb: ·We need to feel that we can trust you and we need to know and feel that you can trust us as well;
·Make us feel good, as we want to experience a meaningful, emotionally and fulfilling life with you..i.e... make us feel that we're on common ground with you;
·Be your true self and don’t pretend; cos we have the instinct in us to smell pretence from afar;
·We know we like nagging; but be rest assured that we women hate to see a man nag; best believe it, we have some men who know how to nag more than a woman;
·Give us your support..i.e..let us feel that you’re the first person we can turn to when we’re in need, without fear of lectures or dis-interest from your side;
·When we hurt, we want you guys to listen and resist the urge to offer advice unless we ask for it…i.e.. be considerate, thoughtful, and kind;
·Compliment us and mean it; cos that compliment goes a long way in making us feel good about ourselves;
·Try not to take us for granted, neither ignore us; cos it infuriates us;
·Show your joy in spending time with us; cos we need to feel that you appreciate doing so;
·Be our greatest supporter i.e. back us up 100% cos that’ll make us know that we can always count on you;
·Most of us never forget things; and if you’re angry with us my advice would be to walk away and take time to cool down, or you might say something you'll regret;
·DON’T EVER TRY TO COMPARE US WITH OTHER WOMEN; COS WE’RE UNIQUE IN OUR INDIVIDUAL WAYS…(Purposely typed this in caps and highlighted it as well);
·Include us in your dreams and aspirations; tell us about them; when you share your life with us, it make us feel part of you; and
·If you treat us the way we deserve to be treated i.e. by showing respect and valuing us; then be rest assured that it’d be reciprocated.

Lastly, note that a happy caring guy makes a happy caring woman….

Hope the above tips helps in your quest to know what we women want……from SANB’s perspective...

Chei Madam Sanb, see check list to your heart. Anyway sha, thank God say I get smart phone, na just to download the Checklist app come input all this thinz wey u write.

Na wa oh, so if me and you come go out nko, men na to score 90% oo, at least. Abi wetin be your pass mark for this list? I fit get by with only C-?

Nashville: Bull-shitting and fluffing. Seriously, its the most important. Just sounding confident in conversations is key. Even if you saying BS people will believe you! Saying things in a confident, convincing and passionate way is very important.

Umm, I have to blow my whistle and wave by Bull-Shiiting Flag on this one, it's a foul.

Honestly I can't stand people that don't know but are bullshitting, and in a confident manner too, it irks me.

One time, this Ac Contractor was arguing with me over current, yanning some dust about starting current equals running current, and he just kept going.

I'd say be confident, but don't bullshit. You can confidently say "I don't know, but you bet I'm gonna know everything about this (whatever it is), if given the chance".

Why is there still NYSC in the first place?

My God, I don't know how NYSC scheme can make sense to anyone.

Santa I have been good, I have been nice

Doing all the needful not once, not even twice,

but so many times.

Remember when I was younger, you gave me a pair of Nykes?

Now I'm older, and still with no vice.

So Santa I hope you reward me for my sacrifice,

and this Christmas, get me something nice.

guiddoti: Stop kidding man. [qu

Please hurry and place your order, these things are selling fast.

Next time your girlfriend starts to yap, yap, yappidie yap, just hit that mute button for serenity.

Mindependent: Aww that's nice
But I just find it funny how all men want good girls when they've spoilt almost all the good girls

It's a good thing girls aren't like apples that go bad after a week, else we might have had to through them all away.

Everybody has baggage, admittedly though some are heavier than others and might need more capable hands to bear the weight, however, that doesn't stop one from seeking self improvement.

So if indeed they are spoilt as you claim, then I guess they'd have to be repaired.

Mindependent: So what's Your opinion?

Well, I see black and grey, which are shades far far away from white.

As I said, I am no saint here, but a smoker for instance, can't justify a cigarette. The smoker only indulges in his/her "guilty" pleasure, its far from an innocent pleasure.

As far as money and women go though, its all good if she fits the bill, the bill here being my personal criteria for a good girl.

That's part of the reason I wake up and do what I do. When I have a family, It'll be the MAIN reason I wake up and do what I do.

Nuvally: Keep quiet my friend

Would you like to place your order

babseg: Ok but can please transfer some MBs to me

No problem, check your account balance.

I just transferred you 100 PETABYTES, I don't know if that's enough.

Are you tired of girlfriends not understanding you?

Are you tired of your girl always hijacking the remote control to tune away from football to Oprah?

Are you tired of always hearing the OO's and AHHs from your neighbors houses, while yours is filled with sounds of soft jazz?

Are you tired of not being able to invite your friends over for the game?

Are you tired?

Well don't be tired anymore cause today is your luck day.

Introducing the all new portable "GIRL OFF YOUR BACK" DSTV viewer with the all new sports package for guys. This device comes with an additional girlfriend tracker and girlfriend mute button ABSOLUTELY FREE!

Call now, and you we will give you 2 girlfriend trackers, and girlfriend mute buttons at NO EXTRA CHARGE.

Here at GIRL OFF YOUR BACK incorporated, we really do care.

babseg: These pictures of yours has been photoshopped a little bit.

I will take another picture from ikoyi tomorrow

And post it here

Oh boy, if you have some MB, check out the short video below.

SINGING DECORATIONS.


https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DJ7LsLz9ztA

Now I'm not saying that we should have gone this far though, I'm just acknowledging that people out there push boundaries, even in decorations.

What we have is Okay, not bad, not awesome, just okay.

T-val:
I Neva understand u.. Make it clearer

IT IS INDESTRUCTIBLE!

Mindependent: What are the justifications, please enlighten me

The justifications offered up by posters are funny, trying to blur the line between right and wrong.

I'm not being a JUDGE here, but my eyes can still tell the difference between white, black, and grey.

Willgates: I am tired of Nigeria's education system. So after passing JAMB what? ASUU right?

Well if you want the full breakdown, then here goes:

1. Secondary school- 6 Years, pretty stable I must admit.

2. 1 year after school waiting for admission - This obviously doesn't apply to everyone, but yeah, sometimes JAMB can FCK-U-UP. Nevermind that you managed to score average or better after working hard, spending sleepless nights by the candle. Yet that chronic weed smoking juvenile delinquent scored a perfect score, HOW

3. University 5-7 years- We have added 2 years here to allow for the uncertainty of ASUU, just like lightning, you can't predict the next strike.

4. NYSC Callup 1 year - Some people have to wait an additional year waiting for a callup letter from the NYSC, or some people wait to be relocated if initially posted to troubled zones.

5. NYSC 1 year- Yes, lets all love each other by spending a year teaching in a village. Never mind that no country does it besides maybe Israel Military Training, due to their country being under constant threat.

6. POST-NYSC (NO JOB) 2-4 years: After serving your country by pretty much wasting both your time and that of the government, you graduate to a sweet smelling atmosphere of joblessness.

There you have it, Nigerias education timeline, but please note that these timelines are ever changing, so please change with the changes.

Mindependent: Funny how 99% of viewers are men

Okay I'm back, but just for you Miss Mindependent.

Boys can sniff sex from a couple threads away, so yeah nothing new. The justifications are kinda funny though, but to each their own (I guess).

Abeg, what about us wey still get the original Nokia 3310.

How we go take download the app

Please abeg, no ask me why I still dey use ma 3310, the picture below go explain am.

The pics below are some A-/A+ Christmas decorations in my opinion.

All in all as some poster said above, it's Christmas, Yayy!!

Why are there so many viewers in a prostitution thread?

Wait.... I'm here too! hmmm.

Okay, I'm leaving, bye!

Okay let me put this issue to rest.

Looking with my very detail oriented eye , it doesn't look that bad, but it could have been better.

The main flaw I see on closer inspection is the fact that the black and white colored curb is very dirty, it would have bee nice if it was repainted.

The second flaw I see is the fact that there aren't enough colored lights, I would have loved to see bright reds, to complement the bland white, and light blue.

Besides that, its an okay job, I'd give it a C+.

If we are going by Nigerian standards, then I'd give it a B-, but that's just the thing innit? we need to raise our standards in all that we do. I'm sure they will get better and better though.

Sexy Lady!

Who farted?

Cele-pope:
People abroad should come back home.There is no place like home.

Hahaha!

Boy, oh boy, oh boy!

If one was to use that toilet, won't the person leave sicker than they came in?

Food for thought.

I have soo many questions:

1. How did this make front page?
2. You only have N7,000 for Android? Abi na Abadroid?
3. So all I have to do is ask a question to make frontpage? Okay!
4. Can I get a Bugatti Veyron for N50k? Abeg, na only N50k I get.
5. How did this make front page?
6. Are the moderators on early Christmas break?
7. Is Seun aware of this?

and lastly,

8. How did this make front page?


@Op, only kidding, hope you find what you're looking for.

Je ne parle pas pidjon.

Rexceedo: na im, Nigerians likes boosting without finding d actual use of d thing they boost with

Really pathetic!

Christianos: If this is not the right section to post this article, please forgive me.

We have suffered power outage in my area in the last 5 months; I mean it has not even blinked. During this period, we have continued to receive PHCN bills for "light" not used. Businesses have been crippled and robbers now operate freely under the blanket of darkness caused by the power outage.

Considering the reach and influence of this great forum, I am persuaded that someone in good position will read this article and take action.

Mods, please put this on FP, if it's not too much trouble. If the situation improves anytime soon, I'll surely be back here to thank you all.

Damn! All nairalanders please wave your lighters in the air, for our comrade who has been forgotten. Together, with these lighters, we shall light up the OPs house.

Okay in all seriousness though, it's pathetic that someone will still campaign to give you guys light in the next election, haha, in the 21st century.

Sometimes all these laws in Nigeria just make me laugh.

What is the original purpose of a tint, isn't it to filter some of the suns rays, thereby keeping you cooler?

In saner climes, they have a tint value not to be exceeded, but here look what we have. Keep in mind that Nigeria is one hot muthafuc....

So clap for dummies, one again they have excelled in stupidity. No scientific approach whatsoever, they just say ban them all.

Now there is jail time, just imagine being in a cell with like hardened guys, and every body is telling their war stories.
"Hey what u in for?", "stealing",
"u?", "I killed someone, but I regret it"
"u?", "I stole a car"
"What about you, new guy?", "me?", "well I was driving a tinted car."

Expect a ban on sunglasses soon, police officers need to be able to see ur eyes, so they can know if you're looking at them funny.

COOLDUN: These apes that believe that their ancestor fell down from the sky with a broom and calabash will never wake up and face the realities of the 21st century. They are still living in the 1st century, while still claiming to be educated, I wonder how these people would have been, if they were not educated with a confiscated money from one section of the country.

Why in this modern time someone is wasting the lives of innocent people in the name of money ritual? Who told them that money ritual is real? Though if a tribe’s existence is based on lie/fable stories, which all of the people believe to an extend that it is written in the history books , why won’t they believe it, even if they were told that their grandfathers were transformed from women to men.

They have changed from diverting innocent bus travelers in their cities to their evil forests to the robbing of newly born babies in the hospitals.

Now I can believe a testimony of One of the escaped victims of the evil forest ritualists wrote how he and co army officer in the bus with guns overpowered ritualists/agents and slaughtered them including their village partners in rituals who always pretend to be helpers to the lucky escaped victims; he said that he and the co army officer pretended to be asleep when they blew their powdered substance in the bus, and made sure that they were proved beyond reasonable doubt that they were ritualists, when they were about to enter into the Sagamu/Lagos express way evil forest, when the bus slowed down because of the bad road, the army officer blew off the driver’s head which made the bus to fell in a ditch, before the other ritualists could know it they have surrendered them with their guns, shooting them on their heads, and tortured the remaining who pointed at the other females patners in the bus that pretended to be victims too. While they were toturing them they started showing them their villagers co ritualists too.

The army guys said that if they took them to the authorities they would be freed by their high placed patronizers so they decided to waste the ones they caught and freed the genuine passengers in the bus and fled the scene too.

I can see that the bus travelers are wiser and well prepared nowadays, that is why they have resorted to invading the hospitals.

I believe that this has made them to change their method by invading the hospitals in their towns, as foolish gullible people they are. Why should a man kill his fellow human being for money ritual? And their people would be claiming that other section of the country is desperate for money?

I would advise other people to leave these clowns to continue killing/wasting their new generation by killing them for senseless reasons so that they will seize to exist very soon. Keep on killing yourselves and point your fingers at other people.

GBOMO GBOMO. CARRY GO.

I was feeling your post till the part in bold. What do you mean by they should keep killing themselves? Isn't it bad people that are killing good poeple?

So you mean the bad people should kill all the good people?

Same thing with Boko Haram, some people said, the northerners should finish killing themselves. Can't you see that in every case there is a good person and a bad person. Why advocate for a whole tribe to kill themselves?

daz_york: Some things confuse me.
A certain generation was in the prime of their lives when Nigeria came into being as an independent state. This generation was the generation which enjoyed all that there was to enjoy in this previously great country. Their generation existed at a time when N1 exchanged for $2. They had government provision for healthcare, accommodation, education up to tertiary level, and employment/business finance assistance afterwards.
This generation built houses, married and were given in marriage, travelled round the world and lived a standard of life which made Nigeria the envy of many nations across the earth.

Fast forward to 2013.
This generation could not bequeath constant electricity to us.
They could not bequeath pipe borne water supply to most of us.
They could not bequeath solid infrastructure.
They couldn't leave a solid road network behind.
Or suitable transport infrastructure like intercity rail and metro lines.
Or an educational system which updated itself beyond 1985.
Or a highly valued currency comensurate to our global standing.
Or healthcare infrastructure.
Or suitable facilities to train healthcare professionals.
Or industrial establishments to provide employment for the large population they created.
Or a government and civil service framework which is useful, efficient and fit for purpose.
Or stable and properly functioning national industries critical to our growth and security like Ajaokuta Steel.
Or local car assembly to prevent needless devaluing of the Naira due to importation of finished vehicles.
Or a large scale, mechanised, documented and contracted agricultural sector.
Or a vaguely transparent petroleum sector. (Please who can tell me how much revenue the NNPC makes and where it goes?!)
Or a functioning state-owned telecomms company to prevent price exploitation by foreign firms.
Or a functioning national broadcast media framework to prevent exploitation by foreign firms.
Or a fit-for-purpose NYSC scheme which is not beset by waste, theft, bribery, lack of transparency, incompetence and intimidation.
Or even a credible plan to turn the country's fortunes around by committing mass suicide.
They couldn't even use birth control to prevent the explosion of a population they were too lazy and incompetent to take care of!

This generation which this old hag belongs to is without doubt THE WORST generation of Black people the world has ever seen.
While the world waited to see a Black superpower emerging to lead Africa to freedom and prosperity, all they did was talk, drink beer, have sex, pop out children and steal money.

And this awful generation of indolent, lazy, feckless, incompetent, thoroughly useless oxygen thieves has the NERVE to lecture US about concepts like "decency"!

You want to know what's decent, Mrs Wife-of-Irrelevant-Chieftain?
Those imported Ford Taurus cars which Gov Kayode Fayemi distributed to your husband and all other traditional rulers in Ekiti some weeks back, why didn't you refuse it?
Each of those cars is worth at least N4.5 million - do you know what that amount can do in the life of the average Nigerian youth? But of course you accepted it like the greedy, corpulent fuccker you are and now you wish to set yourself up as the moral arbiter of society on an issue as irrelevant as "dressing".

That generation, instead of doing the decent thing and retiring to their graves so we can start to clean up the giant mess they have left behind - they still wish to dictate to us about morality!

Honestly from the bottom of my heart, all of you should please die! Die and leave us in peace so that we can start moving forward without the dead weight of you and your worthless opinions!

Horrid set of people!

I just want to say bravo!

Don't forget to add some gangsta rap music, always makes people dance.

Now raise your hands in the air, like its a stick up, and wave them like you just don't care.