noblefada: ~smh~ just reading comments from the ladies proves the open right. Listen ladies no matter how you try to justify it, it can never be the same, you're always to submit and be a more humble. Though there are some who want to run over you, but I can assure majority are not like that.

my dear majority of Nigerian/West African men are nothing but dictators-in-waiting. They want to run you, run your kids, run the entire house and even run the kitchen. Their true natures may not manifest immediately, but wait until you defy them once or twice and the beast shall be unleashed. The entire world knows West African men LOVE to dominate everything, they get hard-ons from ordering people about. Only 20% could be absolved of this, the rest just want some puppet to do their will without question.

favouredprince: Its funny how some of us react to dis post. My summary is dat men should love deir wives nd wives should submit to deir hubby, cos as christ is the head of d church so also is christ d head of d church.note dat nt all ladies can be loved nd u cant submit to all men, u do so at ur own peril.Am sorry am a bit religious bt d women controls d home tru humility nd nt by force.Men r like dogs dat can be tamed by women.

Thank you. I know some men are assholes, but some women are also terrible. For those of us who has lived abroad at some point, we see how our country men and women misbehave. I will give a few examples...in los angeles, the igbo community always encourage us to go home to marry. They tell us that they make better wives(a lie from the mojave desert) when they eventually bring them, they become something else. Rude, arrogant prideful and the list goes on. When they finish their nursing school, that's another story. What excuse does a married woman have for clubbing regularly with the girls and leaving the children alone? Or dressing half unclad on the streets? They say they have been liberated, always competing with their husbands and when they cannot take it again, divorce. Humility is not in MOST of them's dictionary. It's so sad. Why can't some modern day women see their husband as a partner, friend and protector? Why see him as a threat or competitor? Why can't some men see their wives as a helper, friend, companion, confidant, and extra pair of eyes? Why see her as a threat, competitor, breeding machine, sex tool or punching bag? I'm just tired.

A sense of entitlement: an idiotic phenomenon. No one owes you anything in this world. Female or male.

safarigirl: my dear majority of Nigerian/West African men are nothing but dictators-in-waiting. They want to run you, run your kids, run the entire house and even run the kitchen. Their true natures may not manifest immediately, but wait until you defy them once or twice and the beast shall be unleashed. The entire world knows West African men LOVE to dominate everything, they get hard-ons from ordering people about. Only 20% could be absolved of this, the rest just want some puppet to do their will without question.

minus me. When i know that the happiness of my family depends greatly on the happiness of my wife, why should i oppress her or make her sad. A woman i swore to protect? I know for sure that most women are more discerning than men, consulting her and getting her opinion on a wide range of things can contribute immensely to my(our) success. Not all men are dominant and oppressive, take that from me.

@safarigurl, i have ghanaian connections and trust me, many men there are not dominating, in fact their wives are even more aggressive.

PocketEconomist: @safarigurl, i have ghanaian connections and trust me, many men there are not dominating, in fact their wives are even more aggressive.

like I posted earlier "only 20% of West African men can be absolved of a dominating nature", the majority: 80% are guilty. You guys have a worldwide reputation for dominance

I HATE COMPOSITE BE IT IN MEN OR WOMEN....I HAVE SEEN A 38…yr old virgin waiting to give her virginity to highest bidder..but the digest of the highest bidder never came with menopause in view how and who wants to marry her. what of my neighbour the babe is so proud and so ugly but the worst thing is she is so uneducated and un traded...she won't greet one day she came asking my wife to teach her English that she wants to pass WAEC...how can you teach somebody that can't write any word in English and above all she doesn't even greet me how does she expect my wife to teach her. she went out murmuring something in yoruba and how can one be so proud and illiterate and broke also. men just fuckkkk her and leave. her composite pomposity caused her that.

WHAT OF THE BABE THAT TOLD ME WHEN I WAS STARTING OFF THEN I WAS SQUATTING WITH SOMEBODY THAT SHE CAN'T MARRY MY TYPE THEN I WAS UGLY AND NEVER HAD GUCCI ALL I GOT WAS JUST GOOD OLD DICK LOL...WHEN SHE SAW ME FEW WEEKS AGO,LOOKING COOL AND SEXY ..I TOLD HER THAT MY DAUGHTER IS IN BASIC TWO ...SHE IS CALLING ME EVERYDAY BUT I REMINDED HER THAT I CAN'T MARRY HER TYPE....SHE IS IN HER 30S BUT HER FUSSY USED TO BE INVESTING THEN.


WHAT OF MY COUSIN THAT SAID THAT SHE CAN'T MARRY A MAN THAT GOT NO BENZ OR STAYS IN A FLAT BUT ENDED UP GOTTEN PREGNANT FOR SOMEBODY BEEN SQAUTED BY A NEIGHBOUR.


LADIES NEVER YOU LOOK DOWN ON A MAN WITH POTENTIALS COS THERE IS ALWAYS THE STARTING LINE.....I HATE PROUD WOMAN..I WANT A WOMAN THAT CAN COOK MY FOOD NOT A HOUSEHOLD COOKING MY FOOD.I WANT A WOMAN THAT CAN TAKE CARE OF MY LITTLE GIRL NOT ONE WITCH CALLED NANNY. THANK LORD MY WIFE GOT THESE ATTRIBUTES .


YOU WILL NEVER CALL YOURSELF LUCKY MAN TILL YOU GET MARRIED....


HAPPY BOXING DAY

Aren't you the daft person here? Are you talking about the same Nigeria that men marry up to 2 wives and above? Your post stinks of feminism and politics. I think I'll pass...

Girls shine your eyes well o!!

PureOhio:

Very däft.
The human sex ratio at birth is 105 boys to 100 girls. The overall world ratio is 101 males to 100 females.
Plus, Nigeria is one of those countries where there are more males than females.

What you should have said is that the number of men ready to get married is less than the number of women ready to get married. The main reason for that is the economy that's going in a downward spiral. Men need financial security to start a family. Women just want to be married to financially stable man.

PocketEconomist: @safarigurl, i have ghanaian connections and trust me, many men there are not dominating, in fact their wives are even more aggressive.

very true...I have lived in Ghana and Ghana men are the most weak men in Africa...their women feed them and run their lives ....the are bunch of arseholes....try that with an igbo or urhobo man..these men don't take nonsense...but Benin man can take nonsense that's why most actress marry them and they can send their wife to Italy to hustle ...but not all

safarigirl: like I posted earlier "only 20% of West African men can be absolved of a dominating nature", the majority: 80% are guilty. You guys have a worldwide reputation for dominance

i repeat, minus me. Maybe it's due to mx upbringing.

Ladies have to do the needful,no sane man would love to enslave the woman he truly loves,Women it is a necessity to submit to the man in all humility the worldly system might say otherwise but the Word(Holy book) supports it Ephesians 5:23-25...Wives submit unto your own husbands as unto the Lord,because he (Husband) is the head of the wife,the wife should be subject to the husband in every thing,Husbands,love your wives even as Christ also loved the church and gave himself for it.Guys let us love the Ladies,who knows our love might help in renewing their minds.

I've not seen an article of such high quality lately because it goes to the heart of relationships many of which we see around us have failed, are failing or are held together by cobwebs.There's practically nothing to add.

Prodigy246:
Personalities like Tiwa Savage will not even come in contact with a bricklayer in the first place...she will meet people around her own class whether she is richer or poorer than them..

Tiwa Savage isn't married to a bricklayer?

tonychristopher:


very true...I have lived in Ghana and Ghana men are the most weak men in Africa...their women feed them and run their lives ....the are bunch of arseholes....try that with an igbo or urhobo man..these men don't take nonsense...but Benin man can take nonsense that's why most actress marry them and they can send their wife to Italy to hustle ...but not all

Oga, i hope your definition of no nonesense no be to beat up the wife? Lol. Just kidding. But seriously, some men don't deserve good wives, and some wives don't deserve good husbands.

warrior101: Aren't you the daft person here? Are you talking about the same Nigeria that men marry up to 2 wives and above? Your post stinks of feminism and politics. I think I'll pass...

Girls shine your eyes well o!!

all that amounts to nothing. www.afrik-news.com/news12691.html www.nairaland.com/92409/official-nigerian-population-there-more . Use Google please

tonychristopher:


very true...I have lived in Ghana and Ghana men are the most weak men in Africa...their women feed them and run their lives ....the are bunch of arseholes....try that with an igbo or urhobo man..these men don't take nonsense...but Benin man can take nonsense that's why most actress marry them and they can send their wife to Italy to hustle ...but not all

what is this fool saying? It is obvious you don't know anything about Ghana and Ghanaian men,mor0n! Ghanaian men are weak? well, I am a Ghanaian man and I am not weak, neither does my woman run my life,ediot

nigerians are only known to be 419ners, yahoo yahoo, corrupt, pick pockets, exam cheats, ritualists, militants, oil bunkerers, armed robbers,pirates, pr0stitures and pimps, terrorists. what a shameless bigot

You've just wasted your time sending the link... Which somebody like me know very well could be politically motivated... What do you think of benue state having highest % of hiv and now its cross river? Serious why do you expect me to drop what ig with my own eyes 30yrs coming and go for a link? You must be a clown. Like I said you're wasting your time... There are more women than men born in nigeria. All my friends have more girls than boys some don't have a baby boy yet they already got two girls. Look around you and find out for yourself and drop the link... Do you understand?

safarigirl: all that amounts to nothing. www.afrik-news.com/news12691.html www.nairaland.com/92409/official-nigerian-population-there-more . Use Google please

The African man has always been a chauvinist, not because we choose to, but because chauvinism has historically been proven to be the only way to sustain a happy relationship with a true African female. There is a reason why divorce rates in most parts of Africa are amongst the lowest in the world, and it's NOT because the African female is being oppressed; but it's because she recognizes that keeping to her historical and culturally assigned role in the home is absolutely critical to maintaining the relationship.

Feminists argue that the historical roles of the African female meant she has resigned to been used as a glorified slave by the male, and this argument might be true; but this same attitude that they castigate as being a glorified slave sustained long-term loving African relationships. The increase in the divorce rates among modern African couples correlates with the rise of feminism; African females are now neglecting their culturally and historically assigned roles and pursuing a purely western culture that has even failed in the western world, little wonder we have so many single ladies about with no chance in hell of ever getting married.

The few African ladies who still retain traditional African moral values of humility coupled with a good character never have any problems in finding a sustainable mate, most of them get married even before they reach 25 years of age. These few ones know and accept where their place is, and have chosen out of their own free will to remain in that place. Feminism my foot!

bisiopinion: A sense of entitlement: an idiotic phenomenon. No one owes you anything in this world. Female or male.

Spot on. Asides normal humility that is characteristic of a good nature, I do not owe any male homosapien submission. But I will bow willingly before the man that loves me. Even the bible says "we love Him because He first loved us". I'm not a feminist but I won't like to be trampled upon as a person.

claremont: The African man has always been a chauvinist, not because we choose to, but because chauvinism has historically been proven to be the only way to sustain a happy relationship with a true African female. There is a reason why divorce rates in most parts of Africa are amongst the lowest in the world, and it's NOT because the African female is being oppressed; but it's because she recognizes that keeping to her historical and culturally assigned role in the home is absolutely critical to maintaining the relationship.

Feminists argue that the historical roles of the African female meant she has resigned to been used as a glorified slave by the male, and this argument might be true; but this same attitude that they castigate as being a glorified slave sustained long-term loving African relationships. The increase in the divorce rates among modern African couples correlates with the rise of feminism; African females are now neglecting their culturally and historically assigned roles and pursuing a purely western culture that has even failed in the western world, little wonder we have so many single ladies about with no chance in hell of ever getting married.

The few African ladies who still retain traditional African moral values of humility coupled with a good character never have any problems in finding a sustainable mate, most of them get married even before they reach 25 years of age. These few ones know and accept where their place is, and have chosen out of their own free will to remain in that place. Feminism my foot!

Have you ever considered that maybe those rising divorce rates are a good thing? Women are finally realising their worth and not settling in unhappy relationships. Culture is man made. Culture can change. Women are changing. Men are changing.

No doubt we have been socialised but that doesn't mean we have to remain that way, to continue in a backward state when you have gained consciousness is a slow death.

bukatyne:

Dear OP,

You have made some very good points in your write up.

However, humility is a virtue to be developed by both men and women.

Humility is not for the female gender alone.

I agree with you. It is important for both. But the truth is it is about the way most important quality that attracts men to females when we want to settle down whereas it's not the most important trait vise versa but it is also important. Op here just shed light on something most ladies may not take as important or overlook. Contrary to what the media or some feminist may preach this is very true. Op truly loves ladies to have shared this.

dnacrystal: Spot on. Asides normal humility that is characteristic of a good nature, I do not owe any male homosapien submission. But I will bow willingly before the man that loves me. Even the bible says "we love Him because He first loved us". I'm not a feminist but I won't like to be trampled upon as a person.

i've got a question for you sis, if your husband respects you, loves you, is responsible and seeks your opinion before taking major decisions, will you submit to him. Before you answer, i believe you know the TRUE meaning of submission.

njokusboy: For real In dis era where women are canvassing for equal rights, left , right and centre lyk this....
Humility is no longer a virtue fa, the woman wants her man to cook rice and beans while she gossips with her friends over a bottle of beer...
This equal rights of a thing seem to have done more harm than good, its one of the reasons why divorce rate is very high, our parents lived happily without all dis.. It also explains why men are wary of loud, overachieving ladies.. At the end of the day, men go for women they can live with not one dat is gonna nag them to death...
Plus women are the ones that love marriage most, even a bricklayer can afford a wife but if husband no come for you, ur own don finish... I see them in my church everyday, 30-40 yrs old, wrinkling face, fancy shoes and expensive perfumes praying like their life depends on it, accusing the devil of a crime he didn't commit.. When na dem do themselves... Mtschew... Some of them have turned down good men because he isn't bill gate, brad pitt or adam levine... Or because he doesn't look like me lol... Babes make una wise up...

I've nothing to add to this,you took the words right out of my mouth
This feminazi that the white invent is slowly eating away our women,and the truth is no real man will disrespect a woman who knows her place,pls stop all that macho stuff and stick to your root and my that I'm not meaning being dependent but knowing where you stand

This feminazi that the white invent is slowly eating away our women,and the truth is no real man will disrespect a woman who knows her place,pls stop all that macho stuff and stick to your root and my that I'm not meaning being dependent but knowing where you stand

warrior101: You've just wasted your time sending the link... Which somebody like me know very well could be politically motivated... What do you think of benue state having highest % of hiv and now its cross river? Serious why do you expect me to drop what ig with my own eyes 30yrs coming and go for a link? You must be a clown. Like I said you're wasting your time... There are more women than men born in nigeria. All my friends have more girls than boys some don't have a baby boy yet they already got two girls. Look around you and find out for yourself and drop the link... Do you understand?

are you an illiterate? That was the last census taken in 2006. 7 years later things could change eg HIV rate, the Nigerian population has increased by 20 million or more since then, so the HIV rate could increase/decrease in certain states. There are more men in Nigeria than women, the kids born from '07 till now can't change any of that because they're kids, unless you somehow killed over 2 million men, leaving the women alive, that fact hasn't changed. I'm using statistics and documented facts and you're spewing garbage off the top of your head. Or did you carry out a personal census of all the states?

PetroDolla2: what is this fool saying? It is obvious you don't know anything about Ghana and Ghanaian men,mor0n! Ghanaian men are weak? well, I am a Ghanaian man and I am not weak, neither does my woman run my life,ediot

nigerians are only known to be 419ners, yahoo yahoo, corrupt, pick pockets, exam cheats, ritualists, militants, oil bunkerers, armed robbers,pirates, pr0stitures and pimps, terrorists. what a shameless bigot

I apologize on his behalf, he doesn't speak for all Nigerians -it's his personal opinion. Likewise you shouldn't also generalize those things you said about Nigerians as the people who do these are far less than minority in the population and are present in almost all countries.

claremont: The African man has always been a chauvinist, not because we choose to, but because chauvinism has historically been proven to be the only way to sustain a happy relationship with a true African female. There is a reason why divorce rates in most parts of Africa are amongst the lowest in the world, and it's NOT because the African female is being oppressed; but it's because she recognizes that keeping to her historical and culturally assigned role in the home is absolutely critical to maintaining the relationship.

Feminists argue that the historical roles of the African female meant she has resigned to been used as a glorified slave by the male, and this argument might be true; but this same attitude that they castigate as being a glorified slave sustained long-term loving African relationships. The increase in the divorce rates among modern African couples correlates with the rise of feminism; African females are now neglecting their culturally and historically assigned roles and pursuing a purely western culture that has even failed in the western world, little wonder we have so many single ladies about with no chance in hell of ever getting married.

The few African ladies who still retain traditional African moral values of humility coupled with a good character never have any problems in finding a sustainable mate, most of them get married even before they reach 25 years of age. These few ones know and accept where their place is, and have chosen out of their own free will to remain in that place. Feminism my foot!

bros you just dey yarn dust. There are MANY marriages in Nigeria where the husband and wife have turned the house to WWE arena, where did you get that idea that every married woman in Nigeria is submissive or every submissive woman is married? Submissive women tend to be extremely dull and slow, they can't do anything without being told to, they can't make decisions on their own, they're no better than housemaids and are of little or no use to their husbands. You'll never appreciate that smart, sharp, independent woman until the dull carpet you left at home starts calling you when you're in a different state/country to ask you silly questions like if she should pay the guys that dispose the trash (I had a neighbor like this, sickening)

bukatyne:

Equal rights mean a man slaves in the kitchen while the wife is a couch potato?

O Lawd, I want such equality in my life

and end up in shattered home!

claremont: The African man has always been a chauvinist, not because we choose to, but because chauvinism has historically been proven to be the only way to sustain a happy relationship with a true African female. There is a reason why divorce rates in most parts of Africa are amongst the lowest in the world, and it's NOT because the African female is being oppressed; but it's because she recognizes that keeping to her historical and culturally assigned role in the home is absolutely critical to maintaining the relationship.

Feminists argue that the historical roles of the African female meant she has resigned to been used as a glorified slave by the male, and this argument might be true; but this same attitude that they castigate as being a glorified slave sustained long-term loving African relationships. The increase in the divorce rates among modern African couples correlates with the rise of feminism; African females are now neglecting their culturally and historically assigned roles and pursuing a purely western culture that has even failed in the western world, little wonder we have so many single ladies about with no chance in hell of ever getting married.

The few African ladies who still retain traditional African moral values of humility coupled with a good character never have any problems in finding a sustainable mate, most of them get married even before they reach 25 years of age. These few ones know and accept where their place is, and have chosen out of their own free will to remain in that place. Feminism my foot!

This is absolute rubbish.

The reason why there used to be lasting marriages in africa is because africans are not as liberal as westerners.
In the UK and USA and other countries with higher divorce rates, staying married is not a do or die affair. A wife or husband can decide to end their marriage if they find that they are no longer happy with it and after ending the marriage they don't have to face stigmatization afterwards.
Africa is such a backward continent that people still think that they must stay married even when they are dying of unhappiness. Majority of the people there do not even know how to think outside the box or how to reason independently.
Africans are very quick to castigate people that want to be eccentric or original or that want to separate themselves from the herd, they believe so much in following sheep mentality, they don't encourage eccentricity or individuality that is why many people force themselves to live according to what is generally accepted in their communities instead of breaking free and doing what makes them truly happy.

Longer lasting marriages in africa is not due to the effectiveness of chauvinism, it is due to stigmatization of single adults and that in turn is due to the general foolishness and sheep mentality of africans.
That statement you made about african women needing to be controlled by men to ensure long lasting marriages is a big lie. It is just self centered chauvinism and it is borne out of your need control women and keep them under your feet because you find it difficult to simply let them live their lives in peace without being bossed around by men.

What the f**k is wrong with men anyway? Why do you people feel the need to control women?
WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?
Do you have some kind of mental disorder or something that prevents you from letting women live their lives the way they please and be happy?
Do you have some kind of psychopathic tendencies that makes you aroused and excited at the thought of belittling women and telling yourselves that you are better than them and should control them?
Are you people normal at all?

Everytime it's always something about how women should submit to men or humble themselves before men or other such crap that serve to dehumanize women and make men feel better about themselves.

YOU ARE NOT ENTITLED TO HUMILITY FROM WOMEN!
DEAL WITH IT!
IF YOU WANT RESPECT THEN YOU EARN IT, YOUR P€NIS IS NOt ENOUGH REASON FOR WOMEN TO START FALLING AT YOUR FEET AND HUMBLING THEMSELVES FOR YOU.

Silly tossers.

bukatyne:

Dear OP,

You have made some very good points in your write up.

However, humility is a virtue to be developed by both men and women.

Humility is not for the female gender alone.

I'l rather say do ur part and wait to see the pleasant result...but wen a lady is not humble how do u expect the man to b gentlemanly in his actions, Nah nah nah!

Wow it seems Ghanians will never forgive us for kicking them out of our county. Why did we have to do that? Now just see all the enmity it has caused. After all, they have contributed so much to our culture e.g: Ghana bread and...(Somebody help me out here, I'm not being fictitious).

bukatyne:

I guess analysis based on culture?

A rude man is huge turn off for me. I can't stand them

the rudeness cld b as a result of ur assumption abt every man being rude, you knw, hv a open mind and b humble, it works like a magnet nd gv u the wife material brand