deesquarediddy: stop arguing with this OP. Just teach her English, I'm sure she failed in English comprehension all through her stay in school. I mean, did she really read that lady's post? This isn't a counter thread to that thread. The lady never mentioned it anywhere that ladies should settle for less.

Her message was so apt... its so simple. Her advice was for ladies to look beyond physical appearance and learn to compromise. I'm still waiting to know what height and six packs offer in marriage and why ladies who marry short and plum guys settled for less.

Even we guys too...I understand large ass and big breast enhances sexual pleasure but what does ladies with fine face, fair complexion and straight legs add to marriage.

These are crazy desires, if you find love in a partner that possess all these then good for you but if not, it does not in any way portray you as settling for less.

I always preach that people should compromise, but you can't on certain things.

Physical attraction plays a big part in most marriages, if you don't find someone attractive physically and you marry them, eventually when someone you find physically attractive comes around, you may stray.

You cannot tell a man to marry someone with small b00bs cuz the big-b00bed women he likes aren't coming around yet, cuz tomorrow when they finally do, it won't take much to lead him away.

You CANNOT do away with the physical part of any relatuonship as much as you all wish we could

safarigirl: I don't have to be married to have a life. If I ddon't get what I want, I won't marry.

I can always addopt a kid and live my life. You didn't even get the entire point of my post

It's not just about adopting a kid and living your life. I think you should also 'adopt' a man - a healthy man - who would be servicing you too. Very important. Very very important.

safarigirl: I've met ladies who like short guys, to them, tall guys are 'less'

Lies would do you no good. No lady prefer a shorter guy to herself. She may not be too crazy about a very tall dude but ladies like someone a bit taller thannthem or same height don't make it sound as if the ones you met readily prefer a short guy. Some ladies are also indifferent about height and that does not necessarily imply prererence for short guys.

100Cents: Finally, in the end, you will have only yourself to blame...

Since you are a trophy who deserves free food, free ride, expensive dates and BIS/recharge card for doing absolutely nothing. Please do not settle for less.

The way our young ladies carry themselves shows that marriage is not their ultimate goal but scouting for the richest, most handsome and most successful man in the society who is willing enough to pay the imaginary value she has placed on her love.

These sort of ladies do not take corrections for any wrong. They are always right and the last thing she expects from you, her date, is saying that what she did didn't go down well with you, instantly her mind tells her, " it is time to dump mike for John ".

Some of them go as far as dating every single guy who says hi to them seeing him as a potential maga to be kept on the ever long list of those under her false promise of, " I will come and see you ". Because he is a potential goldmine and will serve a future purpose at a future date. This keeps the stu.pid gullible man calling and sending recharge card to make sure he out performs or outsmarts any other competitor for the elusive girl. It is all a game. But it ends in confusion. It takes deceiving oneself first to be able to deceive others..

God punish all the gold digging ladies. All the men you have wrecked with your lying tongues and pretences will hunt you later.. Keep searching for Mr. Right. He has already passed you by when you treated him as dung..

Nonsense..

u nailed it bro.....afta evry sed n done like my mother used to say " the pride of a woman is her husband"

jennylove7575: ha ha ha ha laugh wan kill me, as I dey laugh my breasst dey shake ha ha ha...see okafor talking.. Ha ha ha ha...my breasst still dey shake as I dey laugh..ha ha ha.........

Check am nao....u never give birth but want tall guys. U don't have a job but want men who do...u make no money but have a long list. We are product of our environment and we are in this corrupt and bad economy togeda.

Last time I fake-talked of getting married, some US-based female relatives were hailing me. No show for them there. Some wey wan step down, come to Nigeria to marry. Dey there dey mumu yourself.

Lol
another deluded Nigerian girl at it again

safarigirl: her thread was not the sole focus. It was just the inspiration. The main focus is on the insitence that women must manage evryone that comes to them.

Inspiration meaning, what she said led me to compose this thread, it's not a rebuttal or a backlash, it's just an opinion inspiredd by something else I.e this lady's thread. It wasn't her entire thread that sparked it, it was the comments after. The whole "even if you want a tall man, you can just manage one that's short."

She didn't need to put it the way she did, she failed to think of pros and cons and rather than tell women, "it's okay to compromise on certain things" she said "stop loooking for the tall dude, he's not coming"

The fact that he didn't come for her, doesn't mean she has any right to start up a tall-guys bashing thread (which is what she did) as far as she knew, tall guys are mean and unfriendly and aren't husband materials. She'll be shocked I grew up around short men and they're far worse than any tall one I've met.

Once again, this entire thread isn't about debunking her claims, it was just kickstarted by some of her points

alright then, I now understand you better.

safarigirl: oga, no be only me. Abi can you settle for less? After making up your mind that you must marry Genevieve, will you decide to marry Lepacious Bose because Genevieve is not available?

He can do that if he can afford it and if the women can settle for it.Nobody should settle for less and everybody should go for what they want,what they can afford and what makes them whole.

Women have been free for thousands of years.They have been great rulers,warriors,community builders and mothers.It is only those that lacks that lack a sense of history that thinks women roles are that of second fiddle in the 21st century.

Everybody wants something.What you know determines your faith and your chioces.

safarigirl: I've met ladies who like short guys, to them, tall guys are 'less'

If you want your man to fit certain things, then why budge on them. Fine, he may not be as tall as you would want, but he doessn't have to be 6ft tall. What's tall for Linda Ikeji, won't be what's tall for someone like me.

Someone of 5ft.8-5ft.11 may be tall for one girl and short for another. So the word 'tall' itself is relative. Yes, I'm obsessed with tall guys, I'm 5ft.2" so I can't be following some shortie

I don't think any lady will ever see a tall guy as less, even thos who go for short guys may not mind a tall guy. The problem is with ladies who are obsessed with tall guys tagging short guys as inferior. Another problem with ur post now is that u totally misinterpreted the post by the lady who encouraged ladies to give short guys a chance. She was not saying, 'settle for less', she was only advising people like u to stop seeing short guys as less human, and probably try them out incase ur tall fantasy is failing u. I also have this problem with women claiming they don't want to be subservient to men, yet crave to have a man taller than them so that he can dominate them physical or give them 'protection'. Yet they will be the first claiming equality with me, but they still have a psychology to be 'looked down' on by the men the date or marry. Isn't that ironic?

ebosse:


will you marry me pls


Back to post.... I'm 5'9 ( which is short right?) . 95% of all the ladies I had been with were taller than me.. In fact my (last) Ex is as tall as Elle MacPherson ... waaayback I learnt something important.. This >>>> subconsciously We all just want to be happy.. Forget all these talks about golden calves and Louis scarfs... Forget height,money and all the other LITTLE things .All kinds of girls/ladies/women/grannies will like (love) you if u can make them happy. Abi una never hear of girls wey use their magas money build house and open shop for their short-fat-ugly boyfriend b4?

Finally, there's absolutely nothing wrong with aiming higher. Every1 wants a meegan good or Eva mendes but they aren't the real deal , when u find that special one u just know.He may be as short as Kevin hart or fat as Monique but it would be stupid of you not to take a shot @ being happy.

bros u are not even sure if u are short,okay are u taller than aki and popo,if u are taller u are not short,i beg leave that gurl oooo,
been long av seen brilliant gurl like that on NL,there are lot of safari on this forum,and u know the meaning of safari,daftt unintelligent,myopic,stupe,it could be in a sentence stop been safarism

safarigirl: Being born into a society such as the Nigerian one connites certain things for a female.

From the day you can tell your right from your left, you're basically taught to be subservient to men. You're told that your place is in the kitchen and your brothers' place is in front of the television. Most of all, you're told that your only purpose in this world, is to fulfill the desires of some dude, serve him and bear his children. You are not to aspire for anything more and failure to live up to these expectations means failure as a person.

Well, this thread was inspired by a certain thread that was on FP today:

https://www.nairaland.com/1911041/why-nigerian-girls-should-not

Now, the stupidity of this thread is baffling. Basically, it's some lady telling females to settle for less. Telling us that we do not deserve the best and we shouldn't make any efforts to aspire for such because that would be foolhardy.

I honestly sympathise with her that she was unable to get the man of her desires, and eventually chose to settle for Plan B, who in fact was not what she desired, but as they say, when the desirable is not available, the available becomes desirable.

Time and again on Nairaland you find numerous chauvinists telling women basically that they have no opinion, telling us that we ought to dance skelewu because one of these rare species called 'men' looked upon us with pity and decided to marry us. And for those poor souls like Rita Dominic, Linda Ikeji and Genevieve Nnaji who are yet to be honored witha wedding ring? They should keep praying the rosary and hope they don't die 'marriageless'

Marriage is the be all and end all of a woman, therefore, she must settle for a raggamuffin if she hasn't found a gentleman at the ripe 'OLD' age of 27. Once you're through with University, your next bus stop should be a man's house.

Many women have ended up in loveless, frustrating marriages after settling for less, because all your friends got married after University doesn't mean you must marry at that time. Don't be the one whose story ends with 'Had I Known'

Feel free to live a little, keep your head on your shoulders, walk with your chin up, if you want your man to be as tall as Lebron James, don't settle for Tom Cruise, if you want him to be as charming as Antonio Banderas, don't settle for Al Pacino, if you want him to be as fit as CR7, don't settle for Mr. Ibu. If you must settle for less, let it be reasonable, don't go from a Lebron to a Kevin Hart because you're 'getting old and all your mates are married" no be who marry first dey happy pass.

Even the bible says "ask and it shall be given unto you" so if you tell God "I will manage..." He will bless you with a 'manageable' man.

God bless you as you settle with the best

Is this ur pics? #no offense

adegwurulez: Great use of english, great sense of humor and a great deal of guts -- thats just about it.

whilst i admire your 'women shouldn't settle for less' crusade and your fight against gender-role-stereotyping or whatever dumbass name it is called, i'd like to lay bare some facts opposing your views.

1. In your bid to debunk the notion that men are doing our female folks a favour by marrying them, you only succeeded in turning the victim side of the coin to us. Actually, that is disservice of the greatest order to the male folks. Whether you like it or not, we were born imperfect and there is a great void in us that continually yearns to be filled. Furtunately, there is a perfect facet that can fill that void and that is the opposite sex. So the chicks need the guys so badly as do the guys them. This is in reply to your paragraph on Rita Dominic, Linda and Genevieve. No matter how hard these ladies try to convice us they are happy with their single status, they aren't and thats a glaring fact. I seriously hope they settle down someday cos the fufillment of a woman is to have a home, not just a house.

neither does wearing a wedding ring guarantee any woman that she will be happy. If they are unhappy with themselves at least its not because its their husband or the pressure from society causing it. Why spend the rest of your life unhappy because of other people. You were born alone and you will die alone, so why spend the rest of life doing what pleases other and never doing something for yourself.

2. Its fine if you want to marry CR7 cos he's fit but that doesn't make Mr. ibu less a man and non-husband material. Using the word 'less' in reference to the second group of guys is a tad insultive.
Ladies this days are too obsessed with physical appearance that by the time they realize what they've gotten themselves into, their mr. fit CR7 would have turned them into a nice brazuca ball to be played in their maracana stadium of a home.

Men have always placed the physical appearance of a woman as one of the priorities in a life partner. Why can't women do the same, does she not deserve to choose an appealing partner to have good looking children with too? Most men dont want to deal with an obese woman with diabetes and heart problems, but women should just take that Mr Ibu with his diabetes and heart problems, just for society to say at least she is happy?

i didn't mean to sound chauvinistic in any way, but if my post betrayed my intent then i'm sorry.
My advice to ladies out there is to look inward when looking for your man.
Mr. Ibu might not be fit outwardly but might turn out to be fitter than CR7 in heart so the bulk lies with you ladies; what type of fitness do you want, fitness of the heart or physical fitness, Do you prefer a tall man with a short heart to a short guy with tall heart? (coming from a tall guy )

if u go on to settle for someone who doesnt make u happy, guess what you are just deceiving that person for that whole time you are married. So of what use will the marriage be when its based on deceit?

JoeCutie: It's not just about adopting a kid and living your life. I think you should also 'adopt' a man - a healthy man - who would be servicing you too. Very important. Very very important.

ehen, you can even sign a contract with some fellow. The main thing na just to get money.

It's all these 'I must marry' women that are causing problem everywhere. Man go just dey use you play chacha. If you form like say you no send, they'll be pertubed. Na woman wey no dey find husband na who dey get better one, then the desperados turn to 'managers'.

safarigirl: such ladies are not included in my post. I believe everyone gets what they deserve so ladies like those you describe above are not part of what I mean.

I have a friend that's a virgin and is steadfast in that, she doesn't use men, she's Gofly bt beautiful and fashionable. She wants what she wants, a tall guy firstly. You can't tell me she should settle for less.

I'm not talking about golffigging ladies whose only purpose is to use men, I'm not talking about the leeaches who depend on men to survive. This thread is targeted at hard-working women who have earned the right to have the best.

Seek clarification first

A virgin means, her hymen is still intact. She is still a girl with the usual girl brain.

Now having dated a virgin once upon a time, she asked for recharge card one day after we met. I took it for a mistake. I sent it the exact denomination she demanded.

Dear, the demand continued throughout our 6 month relationship. It came to a point of comparing my financial status with hers. "Imagine how rich you are and I am suffering". Meanwhile I know this is blackmail but I am no fool, I will still enter my car and go and drop money with her. Money was my least problem then.

This lady was always visiting my house like 3 times a week that I got tired of her frequent visits. Mind you, the last thing on my mind was to sleep with her, and since she always felt very free with me, I would have succeeded.

After 6months, I mentioned marriage, she started her games, " send me money so I can come and see you ". You dey hear this one ?

I stopped calling her. 2 weeks later, she employed the services of her parents whom I have never met to beg me to come back to her. Her mother invited me first then her father, I bluntly refused.

Now tell me, was that lady actually looking for a husband

Ademolapaul: Is this ur pics? #no offense

you would do well to bring down that picture. It's against NL rules and it's highly immature. Gof Bless

Maybe if I explain it like this, some of these girls will finally understand.

You know what women call a guy who doesn't settle for less? A player. Yes. The dude has weighed you, and found you wanting. When he calls it quits, then the crying game begins. But you have merely gotten exactly the same judgement you handed out to guys you considered "not in your league". You know, that guy in your university is not in your league. But that bank manager who makes a good living is in your league. LOL. But are you in his league? Question for awon orisa.

OsoDupe: bro, who collect ur chin chin ds morning? Don't worry, I go help u fight d person.

lol dupe u are wicked,person papa haaa,lol pls pm me i wana have as my e-friend and nothing more before some guys start......

Ademolapaul: Is this ur pics? #no offense

Lol. you gotta be kidding me...really?
men have suffered.

100Cents:

A virgin means, her hymen is still intact. She is still a girl with the usual girl brain.

Now having dated a virgin once upon a time, she asked for recharge card one day after we met. I took it for a mistake.

Dear, the demand continued throughout our 6 month relationship. It came to a pont of comparing my financial status with hers. "Imagine how rich you are and I am suffering". Meanwhile I know this is blackmail but I am no fool, I will still enter my car and go and drop money with her.

This lady was always visiting my house like 3 times a week that I got tired of her frequent visits. Mind you, the last thing on my mind was to sleep with her since she always felt very free with me, I would have succeeded.

After 6months, I mentioned marriage, she started her games, " send me money so I can come and see you ". You dey hear this one ?

I stopped calling her. 2 weeks she employed the services of her parents whom I have never met to beg me to come back to her. I bluntly refused.

Now tell me, was that lady looking for a husband

didn't I say I wasn't referring to such women?

I've never asked a guy for something I don't plan to repay. I may hint that I want something, but if he doesn't take it, I won't mention it ever again. I make a lot of 'maga' jokes, but I shake my head at people who use others.

You may have had a bad experience, but don't we all?

Op be looking like Whoopi Goldberg and be wanting a man like Mark Walberg......Robin Thicke comes her way and she won't compromise ( she ain't settling for less). Truth be told, she gon marry Riche Hommie Quan

Mondisweets: neither does wearing a wedding ring guarantee any woman that she will be happy. If they are unhappy with themselves at least its not because its their husband or the pressure from society causing it. Why spend the rest of your life unhappy because of other people. You were born alone and you will die alone, so why spend the rest of life doing what pleases other and never doing something for yourself.

Men have always placed the physical appearance of a woman as one of the priorities in a life partner. Why can't women do the same, does she not deserve to choose an appealing partner to have good looking children with too? Most men dont want to deal with an obese woman with diabetes and heart problems, but women should just take that Mr Ibu with his diabetes and heart problems, just for society to say at least she is happy?

if u go on to settle for someone who doesnt make u happy, guess what you are just deceiving that person for that whole time you are married. So of what use will the marriage be when its based on deceit?

So dey born una unhappy that u always want a man to make u happy? Men are not happy too!

[quote
author=safarigirl]ehen, you can even sign a contract with some fellow.
The main thing na just to get money.

It's all these 'I must marry' women that are causing problem
everywhere. Man go just dey use you play chacha. If you form like say
you no send, they'll be pertubed. Na woman wey no dey find husband na
who dey get better one, then the desperados turn to 'managers'.[/quote] All these things you're saying, you had better goan find husband like others oh (husband hunting) . Life's too short oh, and there's no time sef.

contactmorak: I don't think any lady will ever see a tall guy as less, even thos who go for short guys may not mind a tall guy. The problem is with ladies who are obsessed with tall guys tagging short guys as inferior. Another problem with ur post now is that u totally misinterpreted the post by the lady who encouraged ladies to give short guys a chance. She was not saying, 'settle for less', she was only advising people like u to stop seeing short guys as less human, and probably try them out incase ur tall fantasy is failing u. I also have this problem with women claiming they don't want to be subservient to men, yet crave to have a man taller than them so that he can dominate them physical or give them 'protection'. Yet they will be the first claiming equality with me, but they still have a psychology to be 'looked down' on by the men the date or marry. Isn't that ironic?

okay. I don't know the kind of ladies you hang around, but I've never thought of women as the superior gender.

No one should be subservient to anyone, there should be a mutual understanding, the males will always be the stronger of the 2 (there are some exceptions though)...and he had been created to protect and provide. Not to Lorf over anyone

OsoDupe: bro y u dey vex na? I bet u have sisters that have criteria for the guy of their dreams, does that make them an 'oloshi' as u put it? Everybody to their own want and dreams. Abeg no vex

Sorry my sisters grew up believing in their independence and they have achieved it. They do not depend on what men have to bring to the table as they are more than capable of taking care of themselves.

Thank you.

safarigirl: I don't have to be married to have a life. If I ddon't get what I want, I won't marry.

I can always addopt a kid and live my life. You didn't even get the entire point of my post

This particular post - I didn't send to you...
Pls go to my first post on the First page and tell me where I got you wrong.

safarigirl: her thread was not the sole focus. It was just the inspiration. The main focus is on the insitence that women must manage evryone that comes to them.

Inspiration meaning, what she said led me to compose this thread, it's not a rebuttal or a backlash, it's just an opinion inspiredd by something else I.e this lady's thread. It wasn't her entire thread that sparked it, it was the comments after. The whole "even if you want a tall man, you can just manage one that's short."

She didn't need to put it the way she did, she failed to think of pros and cons and rather than tell women, "it's okay to compromise on certain things" she said "stop loooking for the tall dude, he's not coming"

The fact that he didn't come for her, doesn't mean she has any right to start up a tall-guys bashing thread (which is what she did) as far as she knew, tall guys are mean and unfriendly and aren't husband materials. She'll be shocked I grew up around short men and they're far worse than any tall one I've met.

Once again, this entire thread isn't about debunking her claims, it was just kickstarted by some of her points

safari ur stupiiidity will not kill u,obviously from ur post is because of the thread so dont lie,u cant even accept responsibilities that ur choice of words is wrong,i pity for u ooo,and na person go put u for house,anyway as one guy said no body give a damm if u like marry short or tall none of my bizness

100Cents:

A virgin means, her hymen is still intact. She is still a girl with the usual girl brain.

Now having dated a virgin once upon a time, she asked for recharge card one day after we met. I took it for a mistake. I sent it the exact denomination she demanded.

Dear, the demand continued throughout our 6 month relationship. It came to a point of comparing my financial status with hers. "Imagine how rich you are and I am suffering". Meanwhile I know this is blackmail but I am no fool, I will still enter my car and go and drop money with her. Money was my least problem then.

This lady was always visiting my house like 3 times a week that I got tired of her frequent visits. Mind you, the last thing on my mind was to sleep with her, and since she always felt very free with me, I would have succeeded.

After 6months, I mentioned marriage, she started her games, " send me money so I can come and see you ". You dey hear this one ?

I stopped calling her. 2 weeks later, she employed the services of her parents whom I have never met to beg me to come back to her. Her mother invited me first then her father, I bluntly refused.

Now tell me, was that lady actually looking for a husband

doesn't sound like you were looking for a wife either though

Mondisweets: doesn't sound like you were looking for a wife either though

Explain yourself...

Okay, I didn't listen to her parents entreaties because there was something very bad she did...

naturalwaves:
Lies would do you no good. No lady prefer a shorter guy to herself. She may not be too crazy about a very tall dude but ladies like someone a bit taller thannthem or same height don't make it sound as if the ones you met readily prefer a short guy. Some ladies are also indifferent about height and that does not necessarily imply prererence for short guys.

oh, you must be in the head of every female to determine that. Now unless you hold get-togethers with women, you really shouldn't rebuff a claim.

I'm telling you now, that I've come across tall, large women who won't mind a guy like Ime Bishop...fine, it may come from an underlying need to dominate such men, but they still want them regardless

calebo101:

Sorry my sisters grew up believing in their independence and they have achieved it. They do not depend on what men have to bring to the table as they are more than capable of taking care of themselves.

Thank you.

yea and a lot of girls out their are like ur sisters, independence all the way.

safarigirl: you would do well to bring down that picture. It's against NL rules and it's highly immature. Gof Bless

haha...c authority petite

....if Nigerian ladies want us men to respect then then they hav no choice but to change color:...light skin!