₦airaland Forum

I'm writing this with tears in my eyes. Just some advices for my follow girls. Always stay with your man if ure sure he truly loves you. Dont listen to your friends because some of them secretly want what you have. Ignore his shortcomings cus there is no perfect man on earth. I hope my story heals someone's relationship today. And pls ignore all the grammatical blunders in this write up, i'm not a very good writer. I'm a popular nairalander, i just created this account for this purpose. Here is my story......

I started dating Brian(not real name) back then in university of lagos. He was in 300 level while i just gained admission to study economic. He was so handsome, cool and very intelligent. For some reasons which i can say here, i moved in to stay with him. We had one of the best love lives ever. He wasn't so bouyant financially, but we supported each other financially, we shared everything and i even know his account number off heart. He was caring, romantic and treated me very nicely. I mean he doesnt joke with me. But then there was something with him that was a problem. He is very high tempered and a jealous lover. ( now i understand why he was that way).He has hit me like twice or so in d cause of our relationship. To be sincere, i was alway d reason why he hit me cus i really pushed him hard. We later had a sincere pillow talk, he promised never to hit me again and he kept to his promise.
Meanwhile, i have 3 closed friends who always try to tell me how bad it is to stay with a guy, let alone allow him hit u. And that he has no right to dictate to me and choose where i go to or not. That i came to school to have fun and not to please anybody. To be sincere he rarely allow me attend parties or some school activities cus he feels i might be influenced negatively by my friends or people in d party. Reason being that he has been in the school before me and he knows how these things always end. But my friends made it clear to me that he was caging me and i wasnt free. Among these my 3 friends, only 1 was dating like me, the remaining ones were just into difference guys with no feelings( runs). For that reason, my bf wasnt comfortable with them. Meanwhile, the only one that was dating try to prove to me that her bf doesn't cage her or hit her. And that she can go anywhere she likes. She will only tell him where she is going and that's all. I realised years later that she was lying, the bf even did worst to her. Why she was interested in my relationship, i can't tell.

After hearing all this from my friends and coupled with the fact that i somehow feel i was caged., i started being stubborn and outspoken . Though i must confess my bf did some bad things to me at times and that is due to his anger issues. I can vow he never cheated on me. I became stubborn, started hurting his feelings, told him i can go anywhere i want. He has no right to dictate to me. I changed my fbk password that he has access to, meanwhile he didn't change his own as i still have access to his facebook. He was so hurt and i knew it, and he tried his best to make me understand that all he is doing was for my good. I was adamant, i even moved out of the house and started staying with my friends.we rented a 2-bedroom apartment together. Meanwhile he has rent to pay, and i was supposed to support him, but i didn't care, just wanted to enjoy my life like my friends. I truly loved him and he loved me dearly. Looking back now, i feel bad for everything i did. Meanwhile, the landlord pushed him out after his rent expired and he didn't have anywhere to go. I felt bad within me then though, but my friends pushed me on, that he is a guy, he will overcome it. They made it clear that i can start having my own things, do my own things separately and the relationship will still be fine. And if he is not ok, he can leave. At that point, i knew he will keep coming to me cus he has nobody and he has invested all his love and energy on me.

Well, i started attending parties with my friends, from difference clubs to house parties. Along the line, i cheated on him, i felt bad and dirty initially. Because my sex life with Brian was mind-blowing. Till now, i haven't met any guy that can match his sexual prowess.. Maybe we were just overly compatible sexually. And then after all he went through, he just let me be and moved on, though i must confess life was rough for him that period cus he wasn't working.
Meanwhile, i couldn't get a stable relationship while enjoying life with my friends,all i was getting were pretenders, they will just hit and run. I feel dirty and sad, cus deep down i wanted a love life that can leads to marriage and a happy home. To cut d long story short, in my final year, my two friends got involves in serious relationships. Surprising, they didn't want me around them anymore. Once i informed them of any party, they will stylishly wave it aside with some flimsy excuses. To make matter worst, they all moved in to stay with their respective bfs in their houses. The same thing they advised me against. I became so lonely and i cried everyday. I was craving Brian every seconds. I wish i could change things now, i'll go back to my relationship, never to return. I regretted telling my friends about my relationship and allowing them to subtly manipulate me. I almost had an extra year cus of emotional truama.i added weight and no making-sense-guy was ready to look my way with that kind of shape.

Fastforward years later, my friends are now married to their bfs. I mean they made it work by enduring alot of bullshits from their bfs. Meanwhile, i'll be 33 this year, yet i have no serious relationship, no hope of marriage or raising a happy home. I cant help but cried each time i remember these things. Meanwhile, i ran into one of Brian's friends recently and he told me Brian got a scholarship and travelled to canada for his masters. He now lived and worked in Canada, married to a Filipino with two kids. When i saw the pics of his lovely kids, i cried myself out.
The one month lockdown imposed by d fg took it tolls on me. I was extremely broke. I mean i couldn't even eat good food. Non of my friends could help out and they didn't even want me in their houses for reason best known to me. I summoned courage and messaged Brian's friend, he gave me Brian's number. When i heard his voice i was crying, i didnt even know why. He calmed me down and sent 100k to me. Looking back now, i'm full of regrets, wish i never listened to my friends.
my sincere advise to young girls out there, pls if ure dating any guy and u know he truly loves you and want be with you, pls ignore his shortcomings and make it work. U see those women forming feminists up and down, they are sad inside. Deep down, they wish for a happy home and a peaceful family, it is bcus they cant have it or bcus its too late for them, thats why they always drop some silly quotes just to deceive u. I have visited many women groups and relationship experts pages, and all i see in their messages are sadness, loneliness and lack of peace of mind all hidden in their overrated ego. They will tell u go girl, dont let him push u around. Trust me they all wish they have a man like ur man deep down .Just like my wicked friends. And Brian, if you are reading this, just know I'm deeply sorry and I'm fulfilled that i finally get to hear your voice. God bless you and your home, amen.

Fake story. But I’ll humor you.
Instead of you to develop yourself, you have been chasing d!ck all your life.
Moved in with a guy 100 level. Partied hard at 400level.

Now 33, broke and without food to eat.
Still stuck on an abusive ex.

It is better you guys separate. She is very vindictive and is paying you back for all you did to her back in Naija.

And a lot of stupid men will still hook up and Bleep. And even give her money on top. Then carry their crawcraw infested dick home to infect their long suffering partners. Men!!!
Tueh!

SenecaTheYonger:
GUYS, THIS IS IT! COMMUNITY SPREADING HAS BEEN CONFIRMED IN THAT TWEET. I REPEAT, THE VIRUS IS NOW SPREADING IN OUR LOCAL COMMUNITIES - THE LOCK DOWN FAILED.

WHAT THEY WON'T TELL YOU IS THAT THE LOCK DOWN WAS SUPPOSED TO PREVENT COMMUNITY SPREADING, BUT IT FAILED.

IF WE CANNOT MASSIVE TEST (50,000 TEST/DAY) WE CANNOT CONTAIN THE COMMUNITY SPREAD EITHER.

The lockdown failed mostly because people didn’t adhere to it. People were still visiting and moving up and down, it was just businesses that were affected. And those that opened used the opportunity to fleece people. It is this stubbornness, selfishness and greed that will be the undoing of Nigerians. It can still work to an extent if people restrict their movement unless when absolutely necessary. For example, I know a woman who has been indoors mostly for about a month with her kids and they are ok. Who knows what would have happened if they were still moving as per business as usual? No visits, no visitors.

When millions of Nigerians have relocated due to the governments ineptitude. Of course, they are following events from a a safe distance.

Tiwaz2:
https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.thecable.ng/i-hope-to-be-back-at-my-desk-soon-abba-kyaris-last-statement-to-the-world/amp

What is the meaning of he has been observing self isolation? Did he isolate after returning from Germany? Did he not go about his normal business? Bringing this disease from their pseudo-meeting and putting millions who don’t even have the means of traveling out at risk? Well, at least he will serve as warning for all those who don’t believe that COVID exists.

Hospitals are not safe to go now, for routine issues. Only go when absolutely necessary. Buy some routine drugs you normally need like paracetamol, your bp drugs, your antimalarial and antibiotics. Only go to the hospital when absolutely necessary.

Na you Sabi. If you like, marry one wife. If you like marry 2 wives. Na you go suffer am. But if after the strange woman has wrung you dry and you fall ill with stroke, don’t let me see your two left legs looking for your long suffering wife to nurse you. If I am the one, I will land you a flying tackle on your neck.

Is it easy purchasing goods on Amazon, as a Nigerian? Lalasticlala please assist.

It’s well o.

This is seriously crazy. We are a very confused society. Now I understand why people prefer to die rather than miss the BBN auditions.

All I’d say is to give him space. May God bless you all so one does not have to look at the other for sustenance. Your reasons for hating the wife though. You said her mother lost her husband and went back home with her daughter. What was she supposed to do? Stay back and get inherited by one of her in-laws like a piece of furniture? Una get am for hand

Rubbiish:
Yes it is bad for a lady
I can vividly remember her movies way back, if she is still single by now, it is worrisome

It seems you don't have enough things to think about. I wonder how her lack of marriage affects you.

baby124:
By the way, I am not someone that goes to party everyday. In fact hubby is more social. But I don’t joke when it comes to family and mutual friends function. I show up, decked up and come out of my shell.

She can make the effort if she wants to, there are no extremes in life. If something is important to who you love as long as it does not compromise your health and safety, you will try to make them happy. Any extremist is a no-no in any situation. Run from extremists, they will destroy you.

How can someone be reluctant to meet your family and friends before marriage, is she mad? It’s even for her own good to see if she can belong to such a family or even marry you.

How will she feel if you refuse to meet her family members at all? If you act like her you won’t even meet them for introduction and you will never attend her family functions. Women can’t take that you know? Please and please flee from this woman. This one will not want to see anybody in your house. Trust me.

Why is it always the Sisters in law who got a problem? Now you are calling the Ops girlfriend mad. It makes me wonder how you will talk to your brother's wife. Calling somebody mad just because she's getting married to your brother. If it were your brother his in laws referred to as mad, just because of some lapses, let's see how you will feel.
Moreover, all these talk of We advised, we check, we confirm Bla bla. Who are the we? It just shows you are the ones wearing the pants and making the decisions on behalf of your brothers. In other words, your brothers are tightly tied to your apron strings (puppets) and that is why you want to choose an amenable woman that you can walk all over and continue your reign, even when she becomes the woman of the house. I wonder if those men are so lacking or if they were so badly raised that they cannot choose life partners for themselves, or if it is you the woman will live with for the rest of her life.

Everyone cannot be like you. Everyone cannot be a social butterfly. Besides if the sister in law were anything like you (judgmental and bitter), I wouldnt blame the gf for avoiding her.

Come for party, come for party. One would think you people want to bond and laugh. By the time she's there now, you people will ostracize her and keep her permanently with the firewood.

Pipedreams:
If her punny were a car it would be reading over 179,000 Km by now

How is her punny your concern?

Too late, Davido is taken.

[quote author=omooba969 post=71632320][/quote]

themonk:
Hater spotted
Don't worry Donstan18 will engage you with a wheel barrow.

GTFOH. Golddigger like you running mouth like a broken tap because someone, somewhere got a Lexus. Like how is it my biz?
Hater ko, monster ni.

Both you and Donstan18 (whoever that is) can go fuccck yourselves.

OK. But what are we do with this info?

Mophasa:
I have seen good writtings,i have seen better hand writtings but this is the best hand writting i have ever seen and whoever wrote this deserves an award!!

Is your writting better than this?? then you must be an alien...Lol


Source: http://www.viewsnaija.com/2018/09/is-this-best-handwritting-ever-you-need.html?m=1

Guess I am an alien because mine is finer. This writing floats above the lines of the book. Great try anyway.

Imagine! These people are wickedly heartless.

Pretty face...with or without.

You want the men to go and jump from third mainland bridge, abi? Lol.

tiredoflife:
Dem don Bleep this one wella for bush

Kinappers no go see fresh sweet skin collect only ransom
She must drop

A woman says she virtually walked through the shadow of death and all you can say is; they don bleep this one for bush?

So what if she was bleeped? Did they remove the vagina and leave with it? Abi she can't use it to wee, fucc, or birth a child again after the bleep in the bush? Abeg, pack one side!

latestmodel:
Sad how much we ask about her getting pregnant.

Sad how we feel it's cool to mock another.

Do you know their struggle.. Y'll feel you are potent and fertile huh? Shame on you all.

Don't make gest of people in this situation.. They will be parent at the right time.. for now, it's simple to just like her picture, or save your stupid comment.

Who even told people that they have issues? They could be the one putting baby making in the back burner for now to focus on career. Just having lots of sex and enjoying it without kids attached.
There's nothing wrong with that....
Nigerians are just obsessed with the we're coming to eat rice in nine months thingy

bojbest:
When she go get belle?? Banky b a man

He is 1,000,000 times the man you hope to be.

That you have forgiven doesn't stop them from facing the consequences of their heinous act.

This is a reminder to all of us. A Yoruba adage says: The worm that eats up the vegetable lives on the vegetable.
Most people killed in the cruellest of ways are actually killed by those who work closely with them in their homes or romantic partners. Beautiful Naya was killed in Kaduna years back by her gateman who was secretly yearning for her. One old mama in Benin was killed by her gateman and some 10 others. It was her own gateman who left the door open for the others and informed them of the right time to strike. One story also trended early last year of the lady who was about to marry and was killed by her houseboy. Or is it the uniform man who was killed alongside his girlfriend by his former errand boy?
So many examples abound.

Let us be vigilant because most of all these yes sir, yes ma people are very envious of you and envy soon turns into hate. They want what you have....

olaboo123:
''Is this sack justified?''- Nigerian man asks after his colleague is fired for lying about his health just to go for another job interview

Continue to read the story below



via http://onecornergizt..com/2018/09/is-this-sack-justified-nigerian-man.html

What did he mean by the statement that: 'Somehow, the boss got to know?' Was it not a SNITCH amongst you people that did it? The Judas among the 12?
This is the part I don't miss in my years of working in a corporate organisation. The jealousy, envy, backbiting, lies and snitching.

My friend told her immediate supervisor she wanted to go for an interview in a topmost parastatal. He denied her leave.
She later rescheduled and called in sick to work. That was how she went for the interview and got the job.

Some Nigerians are wicked.

I remember when I joined Judo back in Uni. I was enjoying myself and the whole new fitness/experience. The coach even said he was grooming me for NUGA.
Until a sports guy told me a few months after: 'You want them to spoil this your fine face , abi?'

Omo, I ran from the sports o. It didn't help that one of my colleague's arm got broken in what was called a friendly match.

Nigeria that doesn't have good healthcare. I cannot use my own hand to DO myself. Mbanu!

Hmmn. The "friends" I lent money simply refused to return it and distanced themselves from me. 10k, 20K and so on.
Ask for your money and watch your fake friends become outright enemies.


I can't lend any baga money again. I would rather give what little I have. I have given out same amount I lent out and even more, but somehow, those ones that weren't returned remain still painful. I feel cheated.

Must you show the whole world y'all been having sex?