₦airaland Forum

Asavivian:
Let me share with you a story from my perspective as a Nigerian lady, about the pressure we face to meet unrealistic standards set by Nigerian men.

In today's society, it feels like every Nigerian man has a laundry list of requirements for the "perfect" woman. She must be beautiful, slim, educated, respectful, and of course, able to cook like a gourmet chef. It's as if we're expected to be superwomen, capable of fulfilling every desire and expectation thrown our way.

As a result, many of us feel like we're constantly falling short. We're bombarded with images of flawless women on social media, in movies, and in magazines, and we can't help but compare ourselves to these unattainable standards.

It's not just about physical appearance either. Nigerian men also expect us to be submissive, obedient, and always put their needs before our own. We're expected to sacrifice our dreams and ambitions for the sake of our partners, without question or hesitation.

But the truth is, it's exhausting trying to live up to these unrealistic expectations. We're human beings with our own hopes, dreams, and flaws. We have bad days, insecurities, and moments of weakness, just like anyone else.

And yet, we're constantly judged and criticized for not measuring up to some arbitrary standard of perfection. It's enough to make you want to scream, to demand to be seen and appreciated for who we truly are, flaws and all.

But despite the pressure, we persevere. We refuse to let society define our worth or dictate our value. We embrace our imperfections, our quirks, and our individuality, and we demand to be loved and respected for exactly who we are.

So to all the Nigerian men out there with their unrealistic standards, I say this: we're not here to fit into your narrow mold of what a woman should be. We're here to shatter stereotypes, break barriers, and live our lives on our own terms. And if you can't handle that, well, that's your loss.




https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DNoFXD4Bjo

Virtually nothing you listed there is unrealistic and unattainable. Our fore mothers did it and it's no biggie.

Everyone have standards. Virtually every lady wants to be Odogwu's wife, Oga's wife. What of those men that are not Odogwus, Ogas?

jeromestarks:
This sounds even more stupid.

I understand you had to resort to insult to mask your ignorance on the uses and functions of quotation marks.

Verbtips:
you never see juju
i no dey talk of yoruba juju
i mean juju

Lol na yoruba get juju pass

jeromestarks:
You quoted a statement and still used second man's speech. Who taught you English language in secondary school?
That school should be closed down and the teacher put to death!

What if the quote was just to emphasize on the sentence and not necessarily to make a reported speech?

PrinceofSarcasm:
I sincerely feel sorry for any lady who marries you. This thread betrays your level of reasoning and shows how insecure, immature , unreasonable and unstable you are.

Your choice of wording and structure shows you lack any integrity of character, hence see the low level your mind went to.

You even don't have respect for her or her family hence you had to drag her elder brother into your nonsense.

I feel you are a danger to that young lady and her family.

You are uncouth and have no sense of boundaries or decorum. I suspect you are affiliated with street thugs or hooligans
As she would do well to avoid getting married to you at all costs or she may be a future murder victim.

Anyways for her to agree to even date talkless of marrying someone like you says a lot about her , she is probably a low level woman.

I would hazard a guess that she is either s treat hawker or a road side food vendor.
Likely she is an illiterate too?

You are the one that lack decorum. All these press release could be condensed into a paragraph of three sentences.

I guess you're just trying to practice your new writing skills.

Ahnie happy children's day to you!

MartinCorridon:
Yes you have none of those skills.

Face the topic at hand and deduce logical conclusions not writing rubbish for the sake of writing.

DSS and flouting rules is the topic at hand, I didn't digress.

Can you see you're the one lacking those skills instead?

MartinCorridon:
Nigeria too doesn't want people like you.

If you had critical thinking abilities , you would know :

Nigeria's poor international image isn't about law enforcement flouting the rules. It is about ordinary Nigerians who go about committing crimes.

Focus on the real reason why we have a bad international image.

DSS actions in this story is 100% wrong and must be Condemned but don't twist stories to suit a silly offpoint narrative. It is a sign of low intelligence.

Is DSS flouting the "rules" not a crime?
It's even more image denting when DSS flout the rules because they're are meant to go after those who flout rules.

See who is talking about critical thinking abilities and intelligence!

Hollybratt:
Hey chap There this my beautiful girlfriend i've been dating for the past 3years. i've always known her as a very clean lady. Even though yoruba girls are not that clean , but my babe own is different.

we meet each other, immediately i hugged her, the first thing i perceived is blood, even though she used perfume. i still perceived the odour of blood. I left her angrily and run inside my house and locked the gate. That was the odour i hated most in my life. I didn't open the gate for her, she called me on phone and explained to her. I stopped picking her call, so she asked me is it over like that and i said "Yeah"

IRMC

Aye e ti baje baby

Money dey your hand na why.

It is your attention and money that fuels their ashewo behavior.

OPICANTO2223:
Is like your kolos don finish. People wey dey eat from nose that can understand simple statement

Reread what you typed. Does that sentence make sense to you?

Other countries can never rate Nigeria. No wonder our passport is ranking lower and lower.

To be honest, I'm not proud to be a Nigerian.

ALLNIGERIANSMAD:
and you believe that? As in 500 people exodus unnoticed by security agents. Let them tell us a community are doing hide and seek games to get money from FG, This country should just separate at once. This north no be am at all

Didn't they kidnap Chibok girls? Didn't they kidnap Dapchi girls? Why did those ones go unnoticed?

We all need to realize there are big guns behind these kidnappings.

richiemcgold:

43% is less then half; so I don't even consider her as half-Nigerian.

If she is 43% Nigerian, 20% Ghanaian, 20% Togolese and 17% Gambian, which nationality will she claim?

OPICANTO2223:
Because is Cynthia Morgan. What if it's seyi Tinubu, can the prince try it?

How does Cynthia Morgan and Seyi Tinubu correlate?
Can Seyi Tinubu be making love moves on the Prince?

Una thinking just dey somehow.

NairalandGOAT1:
I thought he repented?!

My confusion is confused!

Back to the post, it has gotten to the point where ladies are now feeling insecure over a man's closeness with his fellow man.

By the way, one cross-dresser is being held in prison for "cross-dressing" (don't tell that wasn't the offense when it's obvious) while the other cross-dresser is hiring the services of the same police who arrested the other cross-dresser. Naija which way?

So why haven't they imprisoned James Brown and Jay Boogie too since they cross dress?
Was Cubana chief priest not arrested for the same offence as Bobrisky?

I wonder how you concluded that Bobrisky was arrested for cross dressing.

SHIVA001:
I'm also Introverted, it's not about Introvert OR Extrovert, It's Devotion that brings Success, be devoted to your business even if you are introvert, I'm an introvert and I'm into Sales. And I'm doing Good at it Earning well. It's your Devotion that matters not your personality. I've seen extrovert That is so broke also. In nigeria. Make your Money and mind your business. You owe nobody shit

On a second thought. That sales can actually help me develop and leave my comfort zone.

Are you in business or you're doing sales as a job? Can you shed more light?
I'm looking for something to keep me busy and earning after this my final exams.

SHIVA001:
I'm also Introverted, it's not about Introvert OR Extrovert, It's Devotion that brings Success, be devoted to your business even if you are introvert, I'm an introvert and I'm into Sales. And I'm doing Good at it Earning well. It's your Devotion that matters not your personality. I've seen extrovert That is so broke also. In nigeria. Make your Money and mind your business. You owe nobody shit

Thank you

NiRfreak:
Leave social media and start reading and focusing on your skill and career development.
You need things to boost ur confidence....and self image.
You also must try to improve your financial status at all cost...this might take few years to execute..but keep on
.
Just keep learning

Read books to broaden your mind
Read biographies to understand the life and struggles of most great men
Read history and political philosophies to understand how this world works
Read philosophy to understand the bedrock and ideas surrounding most life issues and existential questions
Read Psychological books to understand human nature and their tendencies
Read classics literature....
Read also books also about development and women nature cos of ur relationship with opposite sex

Focus ur mind in ur growth and financial freedom...
Then while at this join groups ...club...or church dept if u are Christians where u can be useful and serve others...

Aside these... there's so shortcut to solving ur problem
.
U need confident boost and those are the way out

Loaded advice.
Thank you so much.

A thread was created stating facts about introverts. https://www.nairaland.com/8085220/facts-introvert-people#up

Those are exactly facts about me. But Nigeria is not for soft introverted people. You have to be tough and assertive.
In addition to introversion, I have esteem and confidence issues as a result of my physical insecurities. It has been a limitation for me too.
I can't socialize, network, be assertive and be dominant as a man.

How can I break free? Who has transitioned from introvert to extrovert before? How did you do it?

Zonefree:
How does that affect the man?

Tallesty1:
Her loss

You continue to lose your women to men who know how to give her attention.
By the time you have 6 women in your lives and lose them all to other men and watch them flourishing together, it will be clear to you.

You guard whatever is valuable to you jealously.

NiRfreak:
Mumu boy... instead of u to listen to ur elders , u are talking thrash....
.

What makes you my elder?
Who made you an authority in the field of women handling?

You could be a 16 year old kid

NiRfreak:
Real men compliment their wives less......
.
It's only new generation simping men that plaster compliment on their wives for most ridiculous reasons..it's one of those reasons women take them for granted and even slap them with paternity fraud.
.
Only compliment her once in a blue moon. Let her seek ur attention and be on her toes trying to get ur validation

Don't worry, she'll seek that attention outside.

dominique:
No shame on this generation again. After they now graduate with "strong 2-1", they literally become empty blockheads when they get into corporate environment.

If the job they want to get doesn't require a professional degree e.g Engineering, Pharmacy, Law, etc then, there's nothing to worry about. They will get trained on the job.

If you like get first class in Chemistry, your Chemistry knowledge will almost not be needed in an Accounting firm. And ditto for Banking, Consulting, Tech, etc firms.

Lastly, if someone gets a job and can't perform at all, it means those that screened that candidate for that job need to get fired!

“On April 9, 2024, at about 23:00 hours, while on a sting operation to Otedola Bridge, Alausa Ikeja, Lagos State, a gang of three armed robbers surfaced from their criminal hideout and suddenly attacked the DPO Alausa division with cutlasses and other dangerous weapons, and they made away with her Samsung S22 phone."

Sending a female as part of sting operation team isn't supposed to happen. Can a woman easily defend herself if faced with attack?
Speaks volume as to why she was the only one attacked by the robbers despite they knowing she's a police woman.

Also, don't they have guns? How will someone with a cutlass attack someone with a gun? Women sha!

Also again, it was when a police personnel was affected that they swung into action. The robbers' victims for 5 years didn't prompt them to do so?

Way forward:
Jail those robbers as provided by the law.
Every force woman in Nigeria shouldn't be on the field. Move them to do administrative tasks, cooking food, serving ogas at the office and on the bed.

pocohantas:
Some of the profile pictures are foreigners.
Are they actually foreigners or some of our own using foreign pictures? I didn't know Nigerian woman make friends with foreign women this much. Women bill male and female alike. Nothing new really. This is just one of the few times when women speakup. Most times we suck it up as a woman-to-woman thing.




I was thinking same. Are those not yahoo boys with pictures of foreign women? They sound very Nigerian.

Should adult women(or anybody) be billing at all? Except maybe close relatives to an extent.
Now they've carried their billing to foreigners whom aren't ready to suck it up as a "woman-to-woman thing".

At the emboldened:
People are typing in correct English like every English speaker should, you said it sounds Nigerian. So it's until they type "gonna, wanna, finna" before it won't sound Nigerian?

Drella:
Crazy things are happening!!

Mewa n shele
10 is happening

immortalcrown:
The same reason it is difficult to find a man with similar qualities.

It takes a man with those qualities to find a matching woman. Birds of the same feathers go together.

But people try to reap where they did not sow. The post probably came from a man who is not a virgin.

I STRONGLY disagree.
A man with such qualities is considered a valuable man by most women. And majority of women will be attracted to him, both the ones that possess those qualities and those that don't.

So, a man with those qualities will definitely attract women without those qualities.

chatinent:
Try Semantic Scholar..

Will check it out. Thanks.

Proudman1:
I don't see your point

Adverts should be in the right place i.e the spot on Nairaland for ads.

lavylilly:
if you are older than 25 years the Big 4 wouldn't take you

Requirements vary across the four of them. I have seen one that accepts < 29 years. Another accepts < 27

chatinent:
Dey play.

And what about the different races in the world today...if it is true that only Noah and his family survived?

Unrelated

Can you suggest online sources to get articles to do my literature review? I get from google scholar but they all seem to be 10 to 30 pages or even 5 pages sef. Unlike our own here that our research work can span over 100 pages.
How can I get proper research projects please?