₦airaland Forum

Caracta: All the best...

Your attention is needed................

Op, sorry for derailing this hopeful thread..

All the best in your quest..............

You already restricted the sample space of people that can offer you succour by writing only single females.

You can share your challenges if you care to.

OP,

Originally, 'shrink' referred primarily to psychiatrists, but over the last two decades it can be used with respect to just about any professional who does counselling or psychotherapy. I guess she recommended a shrink for you because of the suicidal thoughts you mentioned.

Meanwhile, what exactly do you think your problem is? Boredom from being single or what? You wrote about challenges bringing suicidal thoughts but only wants to speak with a single female.

Does the challenge has anything to do with testosterone?

One of the reasons I hate cooking is the time it consumes. Though my mum made sure everyone of us can cook and not just cook but do it well. However, the kitchen is the place I hate most probably because I was forced to learn everything I learnt about cooking. When I cook, you can't but marvel at my gifted hands but it takes me no explorable option to enter the kitchen ...


I remember my lazy days in the university, to even wash the rice before cooking na big work. All we do is boil it straight to maximise the carbohydrate content .

In short, anytime I consider it takes me only maximum of 15mins to consume what takes hours to prepare, entering the kitchen always become an herculean task .

Congratulations to the family of my potential name sake.

May she grow in grace, wisdom, knowledge and fear of God..

onegig: Oga mi sir........

Compliments.......... Where is it sheleying tommorow?

I already took a full dose of andrews....lol

The andrews dosage is very good for your health, at least you will release unwanted materials from your system. Unfortunately, e no dey shele for here. My zone does not recognise christmas as holiday.

Work continues...

^^^ You wan feed your entire street ni?

@Ewuro,

Adun ni gbeyin ewuro, adun ni yio gbeyin gbogbo ohun ti e ti la koja lagbara baba loke. It is well with you and yours..

@Serubawon,

All glory to God for the grace to pull through it. May His light continue to shine in your paths...

kennygee: Interesting comments, but no one sad it is about me. We were just discussing this in the office and i decided to post it. Most women in this category are sincere.

1. There is no place I mentioned your handle in my post.

2. Are you by chance a mind reader to know the sincerity of people? Do you have enough figures and statistics to back up your claim that most of the women are sincere? Well, they may be sincere and sincerely wrong due to their unseen interest.

Revisit your doctor, explain your concern to him. If he gives you a go ahead to start taking it, then you can. My knowledge of medicine is restricted to what everybody knows. I believe your doctor should be in the best position for medical advice.

Concerning your fiancee, it is good that you discuss the medical condition with her now to know her stand. If because of this she wouldn't stay with you, let her go, its a sign that she wouldn't weather the storm with you when situation calls for it. You never can tell maybe it will reveal who she really is.

I am an advocate of openness and sincerity in relationships. If I were in your shoes, I would have explained what the doctor said to her and further reassure her that it will be well if she stays with me. Will also give her an opportunity to leave if she decides to because of the condition.

Bro, fear not, according to your post, the challenge is one with a solution.

kar bridals: My brother has his own house nd doesn't stay close to my family house.

If he doesn't stay close to your family house, how come his wife is always having issues with your sisters?

Whether you believe it or not, there are beautiful, God fearing, well mannered and cultured women who just don't have the luck of meeting good Men.
When it is about relationship, I do not believe in luck. It takes conscious effort, will and skill as well as sincerity for relationships to thrive. Knowing the right things to look out for in a person will go a long way in choosing the right partner. If we are to dissect the hidden things of the heart of those you called God fearing, well mannered and cultured women, you will understand that they were not sincere with their choices in one way or the other. Though they may have put up sanctimonious attitude but most got what they bargained for. It brings to mind the passage that says ".....the wayfarer, though they are fools, will not err therein..." Sincerity of purpose is an important factor in relationships.


Some ladies have to put up with the fact that some Men won't want anything to do with them once the "no sex before marriage" rule comes up. They are caught between spirituality and attachment.

Nobody is caught up between anything. If the ladies have principles and know what they want, threats from men will not make them compromise their stand. Why is it that it is the ladies who claim to be subdued by men choices. Every lady has an option to say NO to sex before marriage. If he can threaten you of leaving without sex, you also have a choice to threaten him of leaving if he can't hold his vessel in dignity. I wonder why you ladies always fail to understand that when there is a pure and undiluted love, your intending partner will always seek to make you happy, fulfilled and add values to your life. Sex is only an icing on the cake when it comes to love. Sex will not make any man take you to the altar except for minute percentage. If you give in to sex, do not blame any man, it is because you want it

As a result of this, is Single motherhood an option?

Is this question from a defeatist mind? If single motherhood is what you want, it should not be because of experience from a ruthless guy, it should rather be because it is what you dream of doing. Meanwhile, the spe-rm that will fertilize your egg will come from a man not an alien. Why not be patient for a right man to enjoy the joy that true union brings.

Is it possible to fill up the Vacuum with motherhood either by adoption, IVF or any other means?

I am sorry, emotional vacuum and attention from the opposite sex for someone who craves it cannot be filled with what you described above. There is a reason why you initially yearned for it. The best bet is filled the vacuum with a good man. Put a round peg in a round hole.

Some women in this situations maybe like "lemme just have a child or two kid and spend my life taking care of them instead of putting up with the pain of heartbreak and hurt from a man".

Speak for yourself ma'am. The child will come from a man and not an alien. Why would you want to bring a child into the world that will lack fatherly love and care. If it is a sper-m donor you seek, it is a great disservice to the innocent child. Life should not be about "Me and Me alone". Making a mistake is entirely different from setting out to bring a child who will lack his/her father's love. In my opinion, this is height of selfishness.


The pressure from Family makes it worse with comments like "you are not getting any younger", "when are you bringing home your boyfriend", "early marriage is the best", your family expects this because you are a beautiful, God fearing well mannered and cultured woman so therefore, you are a big catch for guys

When your family mounts pressure on you about getting a man, read them your riot act. My mum once tried it but I gave her an appropriate response, she never bothered to ask me questions again till when I was ready. There is a reason you are an adult. Can anybody mount pressure on you to commit suicide or set yourself ablaze (excluding the Tunisian guy)? If nobody can put you under pressure to do this, nobody should put you under pressure to marry.

But they are wrong about this, Yes, they are

being all of these is not just enough Yes, it is not enough. You must also be sincere with your purpose.

there are still wolves out there making it hard to have a decent man, talk more of a "fiance". Yes, there are wolves and lions out there among men and women alike. However, with patience, sincerity and God on your side, they are not difficult to spot. No matter their skills, a wolf is easy to identify if you are not being ruled by emotions. The brain is a powerful tool.

Is it crazy to want to be a single mother ,what are we to make of this?

I don't know if it is crazy or weird. All I know is that, you still need a man to end up being a single mother. If you are completely scared of men, there are too many children in orphanages in need of adoption. You can adopt one of them. What can you make of it? Life does not begin and end with a man. My final point, despite what you have gone through in the past, there are still good guys out there. Plan, prepare and pray for a blissful union than the defeatist mind you are creeping into. It is well with you...

Good morning to y'all.......

By the power conferred on me as the resident priest, I hereby welcome the newbies but with no official ceremony. You all went through the back door to bribe your way in... The gods are presently angry. And to those that collected "egunje" behind me, I reserve your punishments........


@Salsera, I sent you a Pm....

Wishing everyone compliment of the season... May the remembrance of His birth daily draw us closer to our maker. He that hath this hope in himself, purifieth himself even as He is pure..........

Have a great and fulfilled day..

Op,

Are you talking about only one brother here or two brothers?

The story is complicated, I couldn't comprehend everything. However, I think you mentioned your brother already built two houses, what

is stopping him from moving to his house away from daily family brouhaha?

Get him the biography of John G Lake, his life will change for good.

No man fights an external enemy to neglect his immediate family to the enemy. I am sure if he is not being too bothered about ambition, he will be sensitive to that still small voice telling him not to deny his family attention needed.
Every man, no matter how highly placed must learn to make his family happy and fulfilled. Not doing that is opening crack for the enemy to perpetrate his evil desire. For we are not ignorant of the enemy's devices, lest he take advantage of us.

Tel your parents, they will handle the situation for you

Xtremely Coded: What do I do?]

If you ask me, who should should I ask?

cdamsel: even new born baby know say CC like bribe too much, well she Has been ban from handling cash here,i'm the financial secretary/ treasurer.

So pls do forward to me,u re more than welcomed,pls stay clear of mysticgal she's always cranking in the morning

Who made you the fin. sec.. You all have been undermining my position in this room. Do not let the gods go crazy ooo

greatgod2012: first of all, before i explain further, let me ask you as a man, am i right or wrong with that statement?

What you take as emotional and spiritual may be different from my own. I want to understand from your POV.

Meanwhile, I need you to explain the emotional duties?

greatgod2012: Wifely duties are more emotional and spiritual than physical.

Can you explain this part..

Please help check this.

1HGCG56752A815707

^^^ When you lay your hands on your wife, you do so by beating out the love in her heart for you.

However, there is no situation that cannot be salvaged. Since you have realised your mistake and ready to make amend, I will advise you become more loving, romantic and caring. Win her heart back like you did when you were after her before she said yes.

When she sees a new you that is not fake nor pretense, she will begin to love you again. It will take time but it will happen only if you change for good. In addition, have a heart to heart talk with her. Let her understand you acknowledge your fault and taking responsibility for it. You are ready to change and make her happy again. I believe things will work for you two again.

It is well with your home. I pray that God grant you the grace to repair the broken wall in your home.

Report to the police. Its a threat to life

Dreamflyin: Be strong and move on. I really feel your pain.

You don't have to quote the whole message now....

Limit the number of invitees.

Have a budget and stick to it.

Do what is moderate and reasonable.

Lastly, check out this thread for more info.

https://www.nairaland.com/1534505/brides-come-lets-plan-together

I am sorry, I don't think anybody has the magic wand to stop a cheating man.

The best you can do for yourself is to stop sniffing him around. What we don't know can't hurt nor kill us. Meanwhile, protect yourself from STD.

Goodluck

I guess its your husband that really needs help here from your story. Whatever you are told may only complicate the problem.

However, you can still have a long discussion with him and confront him with all the evidences you have. Let him understand what your final decision will be if your suspicion is found to be true.

Did you cheat on her?

Which authority?

Authority over vain things?

She is not talking about enrolling her in a university but hair salon.

Abeg, stick to your gun and do not let your mum dance to their tune. If she is interested in going abroad, she can go by applying to schools.

It is prostitution in disguise

Do not marry or make decision of marriage because of your son.

Let your decision be guided by where you will have peace of mind, flourishing relationship, and home filled with mutual love, understanding and respect where your son can thrive to achieve his dream.

The overall interest of the parties involved must be taken into consideration such as you, your son and the man. I think the problem you have with this guy is trust issue which if its not in any relationship, its bound to hit the rock.

If you do not want the guy, be patient and wait for a man that will marry you with your son.