₦airaland Forum

Japhtee:
The truth is that after reading this many will still fall into high wedding expense. Just pray you don't get a wife to be who have her girl friends to impress. Most of the time the women will accept low wedding budget only to start adding and changing the plan when you have little or nothin to do than to give them their dream wedding. When I wedded last year I told my wife my budget is 1million and she was like is even too much. You don't wanna know how much I ended up spending. We got to cake shop she will be like "honey cake is the main thing people check at wedding". Offcourse using wedding gown which we rented very expensive cant be used for reception. Is not invoke according to her. It was then i heard bridal train is different from Asoebi girls and she literally dash her friends the material. Again according to her is decoration that brings out the beauty of wedding so we have to go for the best. Let me not waste you guys time with long epistle jare. She is a very good wife that's why am not regretting it but she is the one regretting everything now. Ladies mostly should try and help their man cut down wedding expenses because high wedding expenses usually come from them.

adanny01:
I paid 40k deposit for my wedding video, I am yet to see it 9yrs after.

My photographer's studio was burnt to ashes 2 weeks prior to my wedding. I had paid the deposit so he showed up with a small borrowed camera.

The reception tent i paid for was not there, it was a shouting match a 2 days later. Thank God I didn't pay upfront. I just accessed what they did for canopies, chairs and decor then balanced up.

I even bought a suit for one of my groomsmen, he never showed up. The supplier was generous to refund me.

5 cows were killed in 3days at my wedding, yet there were complaints of shortage of meat.

The only compensation was that my mum never misses a wedding, so people retaliated. She smiled to the bank.

NewSoul:
No where in the Bible where it was stated that you should cook, bake cake, kill cow, wear suit and wedding gown for marriage to take place. Its something we created to scare low income people from marriage.

That's why many of us between the ages of 23-30 are still single because we don't have the money for a glamorous wedding.
We haven't "hammered" enough to hire 2 baba to sing and Basketmouth to host the wedding.

All this glamour is for prestige and pride nothing else. Especially Ladies with their "pepper dem" competition lifestyle. As if the glamour guarantees a long lasting marriage.

Dr D.K Olukoya, General overseer of Mountain of Fire and Miracle Ministries said when he married his wife sister Folashade, he didn't cook one grain of rice, no soft drink. People that came for the wedding brought their own food and shared amongst themselves. They didn't even bother to give him from the food.

The most important thing for God to recognise you and your woman as husband and wife is for the man to pay her bride price, both parents of the couples to come together and bless the Union and for an ordained man of God to consummate the union, that's all. Any other thing is for the media.

SirMichael1:
I've heard this from brides before but never thought it was true.

WandaMaximoff:
Make up. I hated the make up. The lashes were as long as a local broom, I was just flapping my eyes like doll baby. I didn't look like me in the pictures at all. The make up aged me and I've not been able to determine which of my wedding pictures I like.

I have concluded heavy make up and eye lashes aren't for me. Full stop.

mariahAngel:
To be fair on his part, everyday calls are unnecessary, especially from mothers.

They need to learn to give some space to their married children.

Vyzz:
I heard Messi is about to leave Barcelona....



Which club go fit am now

mariahAngel:
It's happening to him alright.

He's probably the jealous type that wants all his wife's attention to himself.

Mindlog:
What is culture, what is feminism from her perspective?

crackhaus:
Tabugbo Violet Amaka has seen the light, blessed is she amongst women.

Until feminists can put equality to practice in every aspect of their lives, until they can stop criticizing/attacking women who don't subscribe to their ideologies, they will to a large extent remain clowns to sane people.

This man summarizes their madness perfectly...

area74:
Dear family,

I have created this topic to get wider opinions from the experienced and especially those who are married because sometimes when take decisions or react to situations they may not be objective but fueled by our personal biases.

What is your take on parents especially mothers calling spouses everyday in marriages? Mother-in-law calling her daughter everyday or mother-in-law calling her son everyday.

Personally, I don't like it or support my mother-in-law calling my wife everyday. Situations like this will make it inevitable for my in-laws to know everything going on in our lives. I believe when people are married, they should be left alone to live their lives.

Please what are your opinions about this topic?

pacespot:
Every animal, including humans who are higher animals, are overly protective of their siblings.

mariahAngel:
I can bet the man was not raised in India.

Indian men are usually raised with an entitled mentality, while their daughters are raised to serve and worship their husbands.

mariahAngel:
Indian women are not familiar with what love is, so I don't blame her.
If you watch their series and see what their definition of love is, you'd understand where she's coming from perfectly.

Indian women as a whole are the worst treated on this earth.

crackhaus:
At this point, you already know that NL is filled mostly with people who present a faux version of reality just to suit an agenda and it's usually the unmarried/never married females with such narratives.

I myself grew up around female professionals – nurses, accountants, lawyers, bankers, one professor, one retired DSS officer – all of them married early, worked and progressed in their career while still married with children.
Two of the dearest people to my heart, both professionals – one a young practicing lawyer, the other a young opthalmologist, and marriage has not stopped them from their professions.

But on NL, they say women are putting off marriage for career, or putting career on hold for marriage... Lmao!
Do people even know what a career is? Someone holding down a job will still claim it's her career that's stopping her from marriage.

If you check the list of occupations above, those are not even fields where you can just take off for a long time and then return whenever you like to pick up from where you left it off, the best these women ever got/get are maternity leaves, annual leaves, etc.

But on NL, marriage is stopping women's careers/dreams – well I honestly know no such women in my life so far, but agenda must agend...

LewsTherin:
Marriage is easy. Once you both are willing to do the work.

It's a lot of work. It's compromising. It's sacrificing. It's submitting. It's providing. It's tolerating. It's more than this.

But once you put in the work, it becomes very easy and very satisfying.

Kehl:
Of course marriage as an institution is not the problem but the individuals who makes up the marriage.They decide the success of the marriage by their actions and inactions

like I said before, a lot of things can be easily said and concluded but it becomes an entirely different thing in reality.

Kehl:
1. You're right, but then... That's exactly why I said that for those who feel that marriage is is it for them, they should disregard the message.

2. It's easier said than done... It's difficult to start again after a long time.. Especially if there were no initial plans to go back. At that point, a lot would be put into consideration.

3. True... But like I said before, it's easier said.. The hard work is in the doing.. Especially in this part of the world. If I'm permitted, I'll share a survey of so many married women with same story. They thought they could go back, but a whole lot of things come with marriage.. It all ended in wishes

4. Some men, even after talking, they don't take it seriously... They would only pay lip service but won't show commitment. They would come up with a thousand reason why it should be their way.

5. For every woman who achieved their dreams, there are a whole lot more who couldn't... And they wallow in regret.

eazzzy1:
Lol abi sis, na to scatter everything since the love Dey shack am. I don’t think it’s a soul tie, I think it’s adults acting like children.

Unfortunately their selfishness is going to destroy two families, turn the kids to children from broken homes and their respective partners to divorcees, something non of them bargained for.

Calling it a soul tie kind of takes the responsibility out of their hands making seem like they have no control over their actions.

I wish their partners find out and decide to date themselves too, so basically family swap. I no holy pass but to fall in love outside your marriage and even worse to a fellow married person. No judgement here sha. Let them keep chopping life .

GboyegaD:
Well, we all have what we like. For me, the quality is key and so is the ambition. I don't want a wife who sees the world from my lens.

Truth is one can get both because marriage generally changes both sexes. So many things to drop and so many things to learn.

GboyegaD:
So true. I remember a discussion with a lady on number of children, school they would attend etc and her response was a complete turn off. Imagine, someone willing to sacrifice all her ambition to be a good wife.

I realized then that quite a number of Nigerian women, finding a man to marry is their biggest ambition.

Kehl:
Let me tell you a story…. A true life story


When we go into a relationship that would potentially lead to marriage, we sometimes leave out some of the most important points to consider, one of which is our individual life plans, and our potential partner’s commitment in helping us achieve our life goals.

Before accepting that marriage proposal, discuss your dreams and ambitions and make sure he is committed to seeing you achieve your dreams, while you also show commitment in helping him achieve his.

Don’t be forced or cajoled into buying his dreams at the expense of yours. You both can support your individual dreams

eazzzy1:
buka wahala. If fleek is still in school in 2022 she may be too young for me. I finished school in 2011. Although at quite an early age. If I do the maths she’s still a baby. I no be Oga Ned Nwokwo o.

Mariangeles:


E don be!
Laslas, na for dis nairaland we go help you settle the matter
No be here we dey ?